Chapter Text
Izuku is four and he does not yet have a quirk.
His mama takes him to the doctor. He’s a tall old man in a great white coat and he smells of mothballs and the cleaning stuff under the sink that his mama tells him to never, ever touch. This doctor-old-man pokes and prods him, takes funny pictures called X-rays and in the afternoon; after his mama has taken him to go get lunch at the Wacdonalds to get an All-Might Meal— they come back.
The sun is shining bright and happy and the sky is a pretty blue as the old-doctor-man tells him that he won’t get a quirk. Tells him that he will never get one. Tells four-year-old Izuku that he can’t ever get one because of some funny little bone in his toe. Not even if it gets cut off. Or broken.
Izuku is four and a half years old, and he does not have a quirk.
He’s in a children’s daycare next to the zoo. It’s summer and his mama is out doing shopping because their icebox broke. It’s not called that, but he has trouble saying re-fri-dger-ate-or so he says ice-box instead. But he’ll master it soon. He finds words and letters and other things easier to understand. Izuku learns them faster than other kids, older kids, and even Kacchan. He won’t say that though, Kacchan wouldn’t like it. So most times he pretends. Heroes and quirks are more interesting than things in books, anyway.
But he’s in the daycare next to the zoo because mama is shopping. The icebox broke so they had to come into the shopping district, and mama didn’t want him to get lost. Didn’t want to leave him at Kacchan’s either. Kacchan’s mama says a lot more bad words than Kacchan, and he thinks that’s why mama doesn’t leave him there instead.
It’s because Izuku is at this daycare by the zoo, today, in the summer, that he gets to meet his hero. All Might! He saved the day! He beat up a mean villain who was going to take all the kids hos-tage. Hos-tage means they were going to steal all of them for money! But they didn’t need to fear… For All Might was here! All Might saved them! He even stayed to make sure everyone was alright after they took the villain away!
He hung back by the side-exit door. Izuku had a small chance to ask his question and not get inter-rupted by others. He chose this door because it led out the back, and not the front. It was the faster way to get out of the shopping area without getting caught by all those people with cameras and noisy crowds. He’d noticed from the videos that All Might never let the crowds get too close. So he knew, just knew, that this was the right door.
And he was right!
All Might was big. So big he blocked out the sun, but still he smiled! You could see his smile in the dark! Izuku is so excited he’s jumping up and down, clutching the edge of his shirt and his All Might toy in both hands. He hopes he doesn’t have an accident because he can barely stand still, it’s All Might!
He stutters and stops, but Izuku bites his lip and he spits out his question. His head is tilted all the way up so his big green eyes can find the sharp blue ones that glow somewhere up past that big smile. He has to know, so he asks. Of anyone, All Might would know.
All Might is big, so big that he blocks out the sun. But his smile and his eyes glow in the dark. The number one hero doesn’t stop smiling as he tells his number one fan that he can’t be a hero without a quirk. Big, smiling All Might, tells him that without one, it’s too dangerous.
Izuku is four and a half years old, and he is heartbroken.
His heart is in pieces, and he is quirkless.
Mama finishes her shopping and picks Izuku up. They go home. He is quiet and he goes to his room and climbs into the computer chair. He pulls up the video. His favorite one, and watches it. Over and over he watches All Might, the number one hero. He watches him smile and save over a dozen people at once. Watches as All Might’s smile splits open so he can tell everyone not to fear, for he is here.
His mama comes in. He knows because the glare from the hallway light reflects off the screen and blocks the video. He can’t see it anymore so he pushes off the side of the desk, the chair spins a little. Izuku looks up at his mama, standing just inside his room. He wonders why she looks so pale and why her eyes look so wet. But more than anything, he wonders;
“Can I still be a hero, without a quirk?”
Izuku sees his mama’s hands fly up to her mouth as she gasps. He sees tears sparkle at the corners of her eyes. Things start to go a little blurry and he can feel the weight of his own tears in his eyes. His mama lurches forward then, stumbles and skids to her knees. Izuku knows that has to hurt, he’s skinned his knees before through his pants so he knows that it’s still gotta hurt, even if it’s through a skirt.
Mama is right in front of his chair, one of her hands grips the arm of it, and the other cups his cheek. It feels warm and solid. He’s afraid of what she’s going to say when she opens her mouth, but he stays still. If he could sit through the old-man-doctor and then stand before All Might, he can sit and wait. He can take it. He can. He’ll cry, but he can do this much without a quirk, too.
“Oh baby, my sweet baby ‘zuku,” Mama says through tears and a choked voice. She sounds the same as when she gets off the phone with daddy in the evenings when she’s put him down for bed and thinks he’s asleep. “Of course you can.”
Something big and scary has gripped Izuku’s heart and clenched it tight. He is crying and scrubbing at his face that feels hot and tingly all over. His nose is stuffy and it leaks and he has a hard time breathing around it, but he speaks.
“How, Mama? How can I do it?” he sobs, crying.
“W-Well,” Mama stutters and Izuku is pulled to her chest where it’s warm and smells of home. She rubs his back in soothing circles and kisses the wild curls on his head; “Y-You need to build up your strength! And you need to eat balanced meals... and... and get plenty of fresh air!”
“How do I b-build up my strength?” Izuku asks after some of his tears have dried. He sniffles and tries to figure out how these things will mean he can be a hero. A hero without a quirk.
“Uh…” Mama starts, she pats his back several times when he starts to cough. She squeezes him in a hug and rubs his back again when he stops coughing, and plants kisses in his hair before she tells him the truth; “It’ll be hard, Izuku. W-what I’m about to tell you, but you can do it, because you’re my son, and you can do anything. With, or without a quirk…”
“What is it?” he asks, worried now but he feels like whatever it is, if his mama says that he can do it, then he can.
“Ah…” Mama rubs his back some more and keeps his head tucked down under her chin and pauses. He thinks that Mama’s worried she’ll scare him. But he can do it, whatever it is. He grasps at the sleeves of her shirt and tells her that too, so she won’t be worried.
“Y-You’ll need to do... one hundred push-ups… uh... one-hundred sit-ups, a-and one hundred squats… and a ten kilometer run. Every day, Izu-kun. You’ll need to do all of those things, every day… while doing your schoolwork and eating healthy, and getting plenty of fresh air. F-For several years.” Mama finally tells him, and Izuku is awed, that she would tell him the truth about how to get strong; “Once you’ve done all of that, you’ll be stronger than any hero I know of.”
His eyes are wide as saucers and he pushes against his Mama’s chest so he can see her face.
“Stronger than All Might?” he dares to believe. To hope.
“Stronger than All Might.” Mama smiles, eyes shiny from the light from the screen and tears.
Izuku is four and a half years old and he is quirkless. He has been told by All Might, his number one hero, that he can’t be a hero. He has been told by his mama, that he can. Even without a quirk.
Izuku is five years old when Mama moves them from the city to the countryside. She tells him the fresh air out there is the very best and it will help him to get strong. He has been doing the training she told him. He’s been trying, but its hard and he can’t count that high yet. Or run that far without tripping and falling because he can’t breathe and his legs stop working.
Kacchan laughs and makes fun of him when he sees it happen. But because he’s Kacchan, he yanks him up onto noodly-legs and half-carries, half-drags him onto a log as he does it. He pops and crackles his explosions in Izuku’s face to make sure he’s listening, because when Kacchan speaks, everyone is supposed to listen.
His water bottle is kicked towards him as Kacchan makes to stomp away.
Izuku is going to be gone next week, days after his fifth birthday. He’s not sure when he’ll see Kacchan again. Not if. Always when. Because it’s Kacchan. So he tells him that Mama and Izuku will be moving soon.
Kacchan freezes up. He’s got one leg sticking out in front. He looks like one of those cartoons with the cat and mouse. Izuku never watched them much because he liked All Might videos and hero stuff more. He isn’t sure what to watch anymore, maybe stuff that can help with his studies so he’d have more time to train.
“What?” Kacchan says, and he sounds angry. He always sounds kind of angry, but he sounds more angry now. He’s spun around and stomped that foot down in front him. A cloud of dust kicked up from it. His red eyes look like they’re on fire and his pale hair looks more spike-y than usual.
“I said Mama and I will be moving next week.” He says more clearly this time, “To the country. For training.” he adds. He can breathe easier now, but his legs still tingle and feel like jelly. He doesn’t think he’ll be able to run the full ten kilometers every day for a while. Not all the way through. He has to stop a lot, and wait until his legs do what he tells them. But one day, he’ll be able to do it without needing to stop. He will.
“Haaaah?” Kacchan snarls. Izuku isn’t sure if it’s a question or if Kacchan’s just being loud about his growing anger. Maybe both. “Whatever! It’s better that a quirkless loser like you is gone, anyway!” he spits out. His hair looks bristle-y and his shoulders are hunched up almost to his ears. His fists are clenching and opening. Small explosions come from both of his hands.
Izuku isn’t sure how to take Kacchan’s words and expressions when he’s looking so much like the neighbors mean ol’ cat Mr. Boots. The one who fluffs up and hisses every time Izuku walks by him. Swipes at his ankles and hands when he walks too close. The same Mr. Boots that will also walk up to him when he’s sitting on the grass in the yard, and lay across his legs. Whenever that happens, Izuku has to sit very still for a long time, otherwise Mr. Boots will hiss and growl if he moves to much. Sometimes, Mr. Boots even lets him stroke a sweaty, shaking hand across his shiny coat. But only sometimes, if he’s very slow, and it’s really sunny out.
Izuku feels like it’s one of those times. But with Kacchan, so maybe, if he’s really careful…
“Kacchan… can I… write you?” He tries. He hopes he doesn’t sound too forceful, “Sometimes, if you’re not too busy?”
Kacchan’s whole face scrunches up like he’s about to explode with anger. His cheeks are turning red too. Izuku hopes he doesn’t growl and swipe at him like Mr. Boots before stomping off.
“Whatever, stupid Deku!” Kacchan shouts with so much force he’s nearly hunched over. His arms are spread and his hands crackle and pop from all the explosions they’re doing. Like a bunch of firecrackers all tied together and set off at the same time. “Do what you want!”
Izuku watches as Kacchan kicks a rock in his direction and then spin around as he stomps off. He continues to sit on his log and watch as his friend angrily stomps away. Only once he’s sure. Com-pl-eee-tely, a hundred percent sure that he’s gone— does Izuku jump up onto wobbly legs and punch his fist into the air. He brings it back from the sky and down to his side and cries out his victory.
Izuku is five years and three days old as he sits in the backseat of mama’s car. He’s stuffed between boxes of their clothes and things as he stares out the tops of the windows that he can see from his seat in the middle. He clutches a notebook and a scrap of paper with an address in sweaty hands. He feels sad and happy and victorious and scared and a bunch of other things that he can’t name. It’s all tangled up inside of him and makes tears fill up his eyes and spill down his cheeks.
Izuku is five years old and he’s scared and full of hope.
He’s going to be a hero.