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Eren couldn’t sleep. It had been a week the incident happened and, since then, he just couldn’t lay his head on a mattress and sleep well. All he would think is how much he had hurt the one who was most important to him and how he’d fix that. Armin avoided him for that whole week. Every time they gazes met when they passed by each other on the school corridors, Armin would just turn the other way and leave Eren’s sight. He missed his friend so much, he felt like he wouldn’t bear it for much longer.
They were always together, always, since they were five, when they first met. Eren and Armin weren’t in any way alike, but they knew well how to handle each other’s quirks, so they fitted. Eren wouldn’t spend a day without talking to Armin, even when one of them was away visiting relatives or something, they would always talk through the phone or even by letters. Eren still kept the letters Armin sent him as kids when he spent two weeks away when they were eight. He wrote one everyday and a couple of them even arrived after Armin was already home, but he wouldn’t settle down until he sent one, much to his parents amusement, they later told the Yeagers, and it was still a good memory. Now, though, they weren’t talking for a week and Eren knew this was serious, since it never happened before.
He didn’t know what to feel anymore, his thoughts were a mess; the only thing he knew was that he wanted to see Armin, hold him and never let go, but then he remembered Armin must be with that jerk. Eren never thought he could be so jealous, but recently he discovered he was. He also discovered that his feelings towards his best friend weren’t exactly just friendship, but something else and he couldn’t handle it well, so overwhelming was realizing it, even more when somebody was taking Armin away from him.
The boys were at the park near their school along with their friends, like always. It was alright until a certain someone arrived. That person was called Josh and was a new guy at their school who had taken interest in Armin. They met in the library and shared a liking for books. Armin was happy to have a new friend, but Eren could feel it, that person was trying to take his friend from him. He was okay with Armin being friends with anyone, even with Jean, his foe, however, that Josh guy wasn’t someone he trusted. It took a while until Eren realized he was actually jealous; Josh would always try to be closer than necessary, always managing to get Armin’s attention when he was with Eren and it annoyed him to no end. That jealousy, though, wasn’t a normal one. Eren wanted to bring Armin to his arms and claim him to himself, he wanted to show how they belonged together and that no one could be between them, and it was then that he finally noticed that lingering feeling he had for a while and didn’t know what to do with, the feeling he had whenever he saw or thought of Armin. Yes, he was in love and now frustrated with the threat Josh represented.
When Josh arrived at the park, he sat beside Armin, touching his legs on his, only to make Eren even madder at his face. Josh looked at Eren and grinned like he knew what he was doing and was happy about it and it was probably true. He controlled himself for a good amount of time, but couldn’t help himself when Josh put his arms around Armin’s shoulders and kissed his cheeks. That guy couldn’t be bolder! Armin got red from his face to his ears and immediately looked at Eren, too shocked to know what to do. Eren, though, acted on the spot and punched Josh on the nose. Everything went blank when Eren did it and he couldn’t control himself, he would kill the bastard if it wasn’t for Mikasa, his sister, holding him back. Armin looked at Josh, bleeding on the floor and then at Eren. Why did you do it?. It was all he said. Eren left the place, Mikasa trailing behind him, and went home. When his head cooled down, he called Armin, but couldn’t reach him. And they didn’t spoke to each other for a week after that. Was that Josh guy so important to Armin? What he did was so inexcusable that they wouldn’t even be friends anymore? He needed to apologize; he didn’t want Armin mad at him anymore, but that Josh…! Eren knew what he did was wrong, but some kind of monster invaded him and he was filled with anger seeing Josh so close to Armin, who was probably disgusted and scared at how violent he could be. Eren was always a little hot headed, but he had never punched someone who wasn’t punching him back. He knew that, if he wanted his friend back, he would have to control himself and he wanted to do that for his sake.
It was almost nine when Eren decided to try and call Armin again. His hands were shaking so badly it took him a while to dial Armin’s number. The “beep” sounds were annoying and he wished they were replaced by the voice he wanted to hear. He didn’t think Armin would actually answer the call and he almost dropped the phone when he did.
Eren heard a sigh before he said the word. “Hello.”
“Armin, is that really you?”
“Who did you think it could be?” Armin sounded annoyed. Eren never heard him like that towards him. Maybe he had really gone overboard… “Anyway, what did you call for?”
It took him a few seconds before he could say it. He was so afraid of Armin’s reaction, but he needed to tell him. “…I miss you.”
“You do? Well, I miss my friend too, but I think he was replaced by a savage.” He was indeed mad.
Eren was desperate, practically shouting at the phone. “I’m sorry for that. I’m sorry for ruining everything. I know he’s your friend, but he shouldn’t have done that! I wanted to kill that jerk, but now I know what I did wasn’t right either;”
“You know, this is no excuse for punching Josh in the face like that. But if you say you understand you shouldn’t have…”
“I… I know. I’m sorry, I won’t ever do anything like that again, just hear me out.” Armin kept quiet and it to Eren to his limit. “Armin, I just want to see you! Please! It’s been so long since we’ve been together, I can’t take it anymore.”
Armin sighed again and after a few seconds, which felt like an eternity, he answered. “If you want to see me, I’ll be waiting.”
Eren ran out of his home and went to Armin’s, which was a couple of blocks away. When he got to the place, he was so out of breath he didn’t even see Armin was waiting by the door. The boy ran to him and told him to calm down. They sat at the stairs in front of Armin’s door until Eren caught his breath. He looked at Armin, half believing he was actually there. He had missed him so much and now they were side by side. He would do anything to have that boy by his side again, he couldn’t stand fighting with him. Armin smiled at him.
“I really can’t be mad at you.”
“Wait.” He couldn’t believe his ears. “What did you say?’
“Well, I’m mad at you, but not so much.”
“What?”
Armin looked at Eren, a serious look on his face, but he didn’t seem mad. Eren felt so relieved, but he needed to understand what Armin was thinking. “As much as I think your attitude was terrible, I also have to thank you. Josh was a little too touchy-feely, I was starting to become afraid of him.”
“I’d call that kiss sexual harassment. You should be afraid of him.” Eren was starting to get mad again, remembering the jerks face and the scene he was forced to watch before he punched him, but contained himself and didn’t say anything else..
“Josh is dealt with and I think he took it well. I rejected him.” So there was really nothing between them? That was good news, Eren couldn’t help feel happy. “But still, you shouldn’t have done that. You have to control your anger. Now if I have other friends besides you, you you’ll punch them too?”
“It was just Josh.”
After a moment of silence, Armin asked. “… Why?” Armin was looking down now and seemed a little nervous. Eren looked at Armin and froze. Armin was smart and he knew he was reading him again, he knew he had now at least an idea of what Eren’s reasons were. He must have caught him. He always did. He took a breath and answered honestly.
“I was jealous. He seemed he wanted something more than your friendship, you know. And he was provoking me, that bastard, though now I know I shouldn’t have punched him.”
Armin looked down and hesitated. Eren wondered if Armin was going to forgive him for what he had done, if things were going to be alright, and if Armin picked the meaning between the lines or what he had just said. If he asked, Eren would tell him. He couldn’t keep his feelings hidden anymore, he wanted Armin to know.
“Hey Eren, what do you mean when you say you were jealous?” And he asked indeed. Eren was ready, he wouldn’t be a coward, hiding behind thoughtless actions.
“I mean…” Eren breathed and looked at Armin, who was still looking down. He wished he was looking at him, but like that was easier. “I like you.”
“You mean…” Armin’s eyes widened and he blushed a little, Eren could see even with him facing the ground. He waited for Armin to look at him so he could confirm and so he did when his eyes looked inside his.
“Yes. What about you?”
Armin answered Eren’s question with a light peck on the lips. He looked around and saw no one nearby, to his relief. He took Eren’s hand and brought him inside, to his bedroom. The Arlerts didn’t see anything wrong with Eren being there at a Saturday night, as it was normal for them to have sleepovers. Eren was shocked and still hadn’t processed what happened. They had really kissed, though it was only a peck, but their lips had touched. He never thought things would turn that way, but he wasn’t complaining. When Armin closed the door and looked at him, his face blushing a little, he remembered there was still something he needed to understand.
“Hey, there’s something I haven’t asked you. If you weren’t that mad at me, why did you avoid me for the whole week?”
Armin seemed more relaxed now. He looked at Eren and smile. “I wanted to give you a lesson.”
Armin could be the cutest thing on earth, but was also a little devil. Eren loved that about him, that bastard.“Well, I think I learned it.’
“Good boy.”
Eren would sure never do anything to ruin what they had, he wouldn’t bear staying away from the boy who was now in his arms. He would make sure to behave himself from then on.