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It had felt like twenty one years had passed since Adrian Shephard had been left on the Osprey, but at the same time it felt like only a few days, or perhaps two weeks had gone by. Adrian had tried to keep track of the days by using his knife, the only weapon he had left from Black Mesa to carve tally marks into the sides of the Osprey. That didn’t end up working, since Adrian had no way of knowing when a day started or ended. There wasn’t much to do on the Osprey, Adrian had found out shortly that it wasn’t a real Osprey- just a copy of one. None of the controls in the cockpit worked, and most of what was inside a regular Osprey was absent. At first Adrian had thought the man with the briefcase would come back. He still referred to him as a g-man, even though it was obvious at this point that this man didn’t work for the government. Or at least not Earth’s government. When it had felt like months had passed, Adrian gave up hope. He still had the unnerving feeling that he was being watched, but that may have just been him being paranoid. That feeling still kept him on edge though.
One of the things Adrian spent most of his time doing was looking at the scenery that passed by. Sometimes it would change frequently, but other times it would be the same world for a long time. He would think about things, one of the most common being what he could have changed or done differently in the past. Adrian really wished he had said something to the g-man before he left forever, but he had been speechless when he got teleported after fighting that… thing. Adrian didn’t even know what it was called. He didn’t know what any of those creatures were called, he really wished the g-man had explained more to him before stepping into that portal and leaving. He also wished that he still had his weapons, or at least the living one. He had named it Teddy, after a dog that he had had when he was younger. It would be nice to have company now, Adrian hated being alone.
It was now that Adrian was staring out the opening of Osprey, lost in his thoughts when for the first time in an impossible to calculate number of days, he heard the sound of teleporting behind him.
“Corporal Shephard, I think I’ve kept you… waiting long enough.” Adrian quickly stood up to see who had spoken, and saw none other than the g-man that had left him there. He tried to say something, anything, but found himself at a loss for words again.
“I know it’s been… a very long time for you. Unfortunately, my employers still don’t want you… leaving,” the g-man started to say. “It’s probably for the.. Better. The world out there is not like how you would…remember it. Lucky for you though, they have agreed for me to… send you somewhere else for the time being. And this time, you do have a choice. You got an invitation to a… party. You can stay here, or you can… go to this party. I do warn you that this place is not like what you are used to, and it may take some… adjusting. If you would like to… choose the latter option, please step into the portal. You’ll meet someone who looks like me, but I assure you that he is NOT me. Now Corporal Shephard, it’s time to choose.”
Adrian looked over at his helmet, gas mask, and PCV that he had taken off long ago and left on the Osprey bench. Anywhere would be better than this place for the rest of time. Right? He really hoped so. The g-man wouldn’t send him somewhere to die after he saved his life numerous times, right? It didn’t take long for Adrian to decide. He picked up his gas mask, and put it back on. He did the same with his helmet and PCV. He might not need it where he was going, but better safe than sorry, right? He walked over to the portal but hesitated before going in. He glanced at the g-man one last time, seeing that he still had that small smirk he always had. Then Adrian stepped into the portal.
It had been awhile since Adrian had teleported, so he wasn’t used to the feeling of it anymore. It felt like he was being pulled along by a string attached to his chest and whoever was pulling it wasn’t careful about keeping him from being jerked from side to side uncontrollably. Compress all of that into a few seconds, and that's how it felt to teleport. When it was over, Adrian automatically tried to reach out his hand and steady himself on a wall, nearly stumbling over when there wasn’t anything.
“Hello Corporal Shephard, it’s… nice to see that this is what you chose.” Standing in front of Adrian was someone who looked like the g-man, but he knew it wasn’t him, and not just because the g-man had told him before. “You’re just in time for the… party. It is a party at Chuck. E. Cheese, the family entertainment center for my son Tommy. I’m being very… kind by letting you join us, so please do behave yourself, and let Tommy have a… wonderful birthday.”
Chuck E. Cheese? A birthday party? Who was Tommy? Before Adrian could ask anything about this, he was teleported again, out of the void he was in and into a seat at none other than Chuck. E. Cheese, the family entertainment center. The lights were blinding at first, and Adrian had to squint to see what was going on around him. There were five other people sitting at the table but Adrian couldn’t properly see them till his eyes adjusted. Most of them were talking, and Adrian couldn’t quite make out what they were saying, as the party going on around him was loud and several people were speaking at once. No one reacted to his sudden appearance except the person across from him who suddenly leapt to his feet.
“HOLY SHIT! GUYS STOP EATING! One of the members of the US Military fucking survived!” The man who spoke was wearing the same suit that Adrian had seen the other man who jumped into the portal back at Black Mesa was wearing. The scientist had called him… Gordon? They even looked similar too, but there were noticeable differences. The man looked like he was reaching for a weapon, but he didn’t have any so instead he picked up one of the forks on the table.
“Why are you here? How did you get here, are you here to fucking kill us and ruin Tommy’s birthday party? Are you back for revenge??” The man yelled, pointing the fork at Adrian’s face. “Answer me! We aren’t even at Black Mesa anymore!”
“Gordon, shut the fuck up we’re trying to eat our pizza here!” One of the other people at the table demanded. Oh, so this WAS Gordon.
“Bubby, we’re in danger! Remember the last time we saw one of the soldiers? He tried to kill Tommy’s dog!” Gordon yelled, still keeping his fork pointed at Adrian. “Do you have any weapons? What if he does, and we have to fight!”
“No no, wait! My- my dad said this one is okay!” said someone at the other end of the table. A scientist wearing a propeller cap. Kind of an odd choice of style.”He’s- he- he’s here to join the party.”
“Mr. Coolatta, is this true?” Gordon said, looking over to the g-man look alike- Mr. Coolatta -who Adrian had just noticed was also sitting at the table. He nodded. Gordon reluctantly sat back down, but still kept holding onto the fork and was distrustfully looking at Adrian. “So. Who are you then? And why are you here? And don’t think that you’re off the hook yet, if you’re really part of the US Military I want to know why you aren’t attacking us.”
“I’m, uh, Adrian Sh-” Adrian started to speak in a raspy voice before coughing to clear his throat. It had been a long time since he had spoken. “My name is Adrian Shephard. Can I maybe have some water?”
“All we have are ‘juice boxes’ and ‘soda’,” said the final person at the table in a cheery voice. He was another scientist and had a mustache. “Here you go!” He passed Adrian a small box of apple juice.
“Um. Thank you,” Adrian said, taking it. There was a straw attached to the side, which Adrian unwrapped and stuck into the juice box. Since this was a party and there didn’t seem to be anything hazardous or dangerous, Adrian decided it was safe enough to remove his gas mask.
“Tommy, it’s your party so is it okay if I interrogate this man?” Gordon asked. “If not, we can wait till later. I don’t want to ruin your birthday.”
“I guess so but don’t hurt him or anything,” Tommy replied. “My dad- my dad said that he shouldnt get hurt.”
“Yes, we promised Mr. Shepherd that no harm would... come to him,” Mr Coolatta added. “But also that he could not... harm anyone else.”
“Oh. I see. I still want to know why he’s here.” Gordon turned back to look at Adrian. “Adrian was it? Do you-”
“Look, I don’t know why I’m here either,” Adrian snapped, cutting Gordon off. “And I’m not going to kill anyone, I don’t even have any weapons besides a knife. And all of you are the first people that I’ve seen in YEARS. Or months? I don't know! This is the first drink I’ve had since I left Black Mesa!”
“So you were at Black Mesa then? Do you know Forzen? Or someone named Benrey?”
“No, I don’t know anyone by those names. Also if you’re wondering whether I killed any scientists or security guards, I didn’t. I never got my orders, and by the time I figured out that was what I was supposed to do, I was already stranded with no one to take orders from.”
“Oh. Every military guy we met was instantly hostile to us. Sorry for accusing you of wanting to kill us,” Gordon said. “And I’m also sorry for this, but I still don't totally trust you. Your buddies cut off my hand.”
“Damn, that sounds painful.”
“It was.”
“Yeah, I’m still sorry for betraying you that one time,” said one of the scientists- Bubby, if Adrian recalled his name correctly. “But at least we’re even now.”
There was an awkward silence at the table, only broken by the party music playing in the background. Tommy slid a plate with a singular piece of pizza on it.
“Do you want some pizza?” He asked.
“Yeah actually, I haven’t eaten in- well, you already know,” Adrian replied, taking the pizza.
“Can I ask why you haven't eaten or seen anyone in an incalculable number of days?” Gordon asked, this time more politely.
“I guess so,” Adrian shrugged. “I killed a big worm and that guy in the suit’s twin or look like decided I was too cool to die but I couldn’t go back to the regular world because I might spill all of the secrets I found out or whatever. So I was trapped in an Osprey alone. For what felt like forever. Now I’m here.”
“Oh, I understand.” Gordon did not understand. “We’re here because we fucking killed a space god. And it's Tommy’s birthday party.”
“Speaking of which, it’s time… for cake,” Mr. Coolatta said. “I’ll go and get… it.”
“Oh goodie! I love a good cake!” said the scientist whose name Adrian didn’t know yet. He turned and looked at Gordon, as if noticing him for the first time. “Oh! Hello, Gordon!”
“Hello Dr. Coomer,” Gordon sighed.
“Hey Gordon, you asked me a question and I have one for you,” Adrian said. “When I was at Black Mesa, I saw someone who looked really, really similar to you and had the same name as you jump into a portal to this orange alien world that I also ended up visiting. Also none of these guys were with you. Any idea what that’s about?”
All of the sudden it clicked for Gordon. He knew where Adrian had come from. But telling him that might end disastrously, Adrian wasn’t like the science team.
“Oh uh, I don’t know, maybe it was an alternate timeline or something,” Gordon lied. “Or you just remembered wrong.”
“Ah.” Adrian picked up another slice of pizza.
“Tommy, happy… birthday!” Mr. Coolatta had returned with a large cake, placing it down on the table. “Oh and… before we eat, I have… another surprise for you.” He motioned towards the hallway leading out of the kitchen.
“It’s- it’s my favorite illumination characters, the minions!” Tommy said excitedly. “This is the greatest birthday party ever!”
When Adrian saw the “minions”, he nearly fell out of his chair. They were seriously fucked up, but in a funny kind of way. When they got close to the table, they suddenly exploded, sending Gordon flying out of his chair.
“What a show!” Bubby said.
“I agree!” Cheered Dr. Coomer.
‘Ow,” muttered Gordon, who was still on the floor.
“Are you alright Mr. Freeman?” Tommy asked, looking over the edge of the table. “I hope that- I hope that you aren’t too injured to eat the cake.”
“I’m okay Tommy,” Gordon groaned, using the chair to pull himself back up. “I’m actually going to skip out on the cake, I’m pretty full from the pizza and the soda.”
“Hell yes, more for us!” Bubby said.
The cake was quickly consumed by everyone else at the table, Adrian managed to get one slice but by the time he finished, the rest was gone. There were some more party activities, but Adrian decided he would sit them out. He still didn’t know these people that well, and he was still processing being in this world. He needed some time to think. Gordon also stayed at the table, but that was because he was exhausted and just wanted a break.
“So uh, how did you meet these guys?” Adrian said, trying to start up a conversation. He really missed talking to people, he had been a social guy back before Black Mesa.
“Huh?” Gordon looked up. “Oh, they were my coworkers back before the resonance cascade. We traveled together to try and get through Black Mesa alive, along with someone else who ended up being the one who caused it all. I think.”
“I didn’t have anyone to travel with, whenever I found another HECU, we either ended up getting separated or they died. Your friends must be pretty strong to be able to survive all that and be scientists.”
“Well, they aren’t exactly human. Bubby was grown in a tube, I’m pretty sure Dr. Coomer is mostly cyborg, and Tommy is definitely not human. I don’t know what he is. Honestly I don’t know how I survived, I’m the only full human.”
“It could be luck. I seemed to have a lot of that. There were so many times that things always happened to line up perfectly. There was always one main path and it always got me to the right place.”
“Yeah… that's it. Luck. Wouldn’t be anything else! Definitely not,” Gordon said unconvincingly, but lucky for him Adrian didn’t seem to notice that he was lying. The two talked some more for a while, until the party started to die down. Adrian got up from his seat, and went over to the window. The outside felt really… off. It didn’t look real at all, but it could have just been Adrian’s mind. It had been awhile since he had seen anything normal.
“Mr Shephard, would you… join us for the movie? The party is not completely… over.” Adrian turned around to see Mr. Coolatta standing behind him.
“A movie? I uh, guess so,” Adrian responded.
“Excellent… choice.”
“Wait, hang on a second there's one more thing I have to do,” Adrian quickly said. He jogged over to where Tommy was standing, which was next to a very large dog. “Hi Tommy, sorry I didn’t say this earlier but um. Happy Birthday!”
And with that, everyone inside was warped away from Chuck. E. Cheese, leaving it empty and partially destroyed.
