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Chuuya was sitting in front of the bar's counter, slowly sipping his wine. It was already 1am and the place was almost empty, the soft music filling the room.
He sighed, the tiredness taking over him. He didn't come to get drunk, but to have some peace and alone time. Well, okay, maybe he was a little bit tipsy, but nothing more.
As he was about to finish his glass, the silence he was enjoying came to an end.
"Hello there," said a man, taking a sit next to him.
Chuuya barely glanced at him, but it was enough for him to see that he didn't know who this person was. He didn't really pay attention to how he looked like, but he did notice the arrogant aura coming from the stranger.
Chuuya completely ignored him, and slowly finished his red wine.
"I can pay you another one."
This time, Chuuya slowly turned his head towards the guy, and then rolled his eyes.
"I have enough money to afford the whole bar if I want to, thanks."
''Let me introduce myself, I'm—"
"No."
"I'm—"
"I'm not interested, thank you." he interrupted, keeping his cool. The stranger cleared his throat, but he got interrupted once again before he could even speak. "Moreover, you bleached your hair like shit, it's piss yellow."
The ''piss yellow'' haired man took this as an opportunity to finally have a conversation with Chuuya.
''Oh yeah ? Then what should I do ? Seems like you're very good when it comes to hair ! Yours is so silky, and you dyed it well—" he attempted to touch Chuuya's hair, but he got his hand slapped away.
"One, use a toner or purple shampoo. Two, that's my natural hair colour. And three, don't fucking touch me."
The man huffed, a smirk plastered on his face. Oh, Chuuya wanted to punch this smile away so bad.
"I love the way you act. So bold." the blonde stranger muttered in a low voice, making Chuuya shiver. In disgust. "Keep talking to me like this and I may just—"
''I have a boyfriend."
Oh.
Did he, now.
''Oh, do you ?"
''Yeah, I do, stop trying."
He actually didn't.
"You know... That's a lame excuse we get to hear often. Well, it would be actually surprising that you don't have a boyfriend because your beauty is remarkable, but you are bad at lying," the man said, his voice smooth.
Chuuya got up, fed up by the stranger's behaviour. He was about to pay for his glass until the blonde grabbed his arm, the grip painfully tight, but not enough to affect the mafioso.
"Fucking leave me alone or I'll call him."
Honestly, he could just walk away if he wanted to. But the problem was: this bar was reputated amongst criminal organisation. If he were to kill this guy, he'd just bring big trouble to the Port Mafia. He didn't know how high was this man's status.
Great, he thought. Bravo. Now who are you going to call ?
Definitely not Akutagawa. He would just destroy the entire bar, and even Chuuya in the process. Accidentally.
Tachihara, maybe ? No, it would end up with a murder, which was exactly what they were trying to avoid.
Hirotsu... He had nothing against dilfs, but no.
...
Oh hell no.
And yet, it was his last option.
''Okay, go ahead then, call your boyfriend," said the stranger, crossing his legs.
Chuuya sighed and started scrolling through his phone contacts. When he saw the name Mackerel, he hesitated for a few seconds, but he came back to reality when he felt the man's hand still gripping his arm. He violently pulled his arm away and then finally started the call.
He was hoping for Dazai to answer, but it also made him irritated. He knew he'd get teased for that. What a pain.
The beeping sound went on for a few seconds, before finally stopping.
"Chuuuuyaaaaa ! What a surprise ! It's so late, are you perhaps missing me ? How cu—"
"Yeah, hi babe, I'm sorry for calling you so late."
Even though he couldn't see him, Chuuya was one hundred percent sure that the brunette was blinking in confusion behind his phone. The babe was also sounding very much forced.
"...I'm Dazai."
"Yes, I know love," Chuuya insisted, feeling the blond's stare on him, making him feel annoyed. ''I have a little problem you see..."
"Are you drunk ? How drunk are you ? It sounds serious—"
"I'm not drunk you dipshi— honey," he softened his voice towards the end. "Someone is causing me...trouble."
The detective seemed to finally understand that something was genuinely wrong. He then whispered :
"Can the ''someone'' hear me ?"
"No, he can't let the dog go into our house."
Dazai was quick to understand that it was a way to say ''no, he can't" without looking suspicious.
"Where are you ?" he then asked, already getting ready to go outside.
"At the bar, you know, the usual."
"Oh, okay, that's why you're not beating the shit out of him." jokingly guessed Dazai, putting on his coat. Chuuya could then hear him open and then close his door.
Wait, what.
He wasn't really expecting for Dazai to come. He simply wanted to show that he had a ''boyfriend'', then go away.
"You don't have to—"
"Stay with me on the phone."
Chuuya was about to get worried. It sounded suspicious coming from Dazai, who was quite literally a social misfit.
''Alright." he said softly, then looked at the stranger. "Isn't it enough for you ? My boyfriend's coming."
''Are you okay ?" asked the brunet, speeding up his pace without even noticing it.
"Yeah, his face is just annoying the shit out of me."
He got interrupted by the bar's door getting opened in a loud noise, drawing everybody's attention.
Chuuya tried to see who it was and, to his surprise, it was Dazai. Just how fast did he have to walk to be already here ? He let out a relieved sigh.
''Is he your man ?" asked the stranger.
''The one and only, I guess..."
Chuuya could see the detective trying to find him, and when he did, he casually approached him and the blonde man.
Big was his surprise when Dazai put his arm around his shoulders, bringing him close to himself.
And even bigger was his surprise when Dazai greeted him in such a gentle voice :
''Hi Chuu, I'm sorry for taking so long, I tried to come here as fast as possible."
"Oh, ew, don't call me that I'm not a train."
And what was an even bigger surprise to Chuuya ?
Dazai giving him an oh so tender forehead kiss.
Chuuya froze like internet explorer back in the 2000s. Most probably because he wasn't expecting it, and not because he thought it was very endearing. But, in all fairness, it was still kind of gross. Such mixed feelings on this one.
He came back to reality when the Dazai spoke again.
"Are you alright ? Did he do anything to you ?"
''Hi..." finally answered Chuuya, cursing himself for being so slow. "He kept trying to flirt with me, wanted to buy me another glass of wine, and he didn't believe me when I said I have a boyfriend."
Dazai hummed, now fully understanding the situation. He knew Chuuya could have had easily thrown the man into space if he wanted to, but he most probably didn't want to cause havoc in the bar nor in the Port Mafia. The detective glared at the troublesome stranger.
"Why does he need to have a boyfriend for you to leave him alone ?" he asked, his tone very calm, but with a tint of coldness.
''I thought that maybe he—" he tried to explain, only to get interrupted by a sardonic laugh.
"A no is a no. I'm pretty sure my boyfriend was uncomfortable. Right ?"
Chuuya quickly nodded, without an ounce of hesitation, even though he wasn't actually uncomfortable, just pissed. He cringed at "my boyfriend", because it sounded very unnatural. Who even says such things ? It felt weird, but he knew it had to be done.
Chuuya could feel Dazai's embrace tightening around him, but it wasn't painful. It was soft, and even comforting.
"Some of them say no to be wanted," casually said the blonde man, an arrogant smile back on his face.
"Dude what the fuck is wrong with you. I changed my mind, I want to murder him," Chuuya said in disgust.
Dazai slowly inhaled and then exhale, this being an attempt at staying calm. He then called the barman, who quickly approached.
''So," he started, clearing his throat. "I want you to ban this man from the bar."
"Dazai, what if he's high ranked ! Since when are you dumb !" protested Chuuya, but the detective ignored him. He then kept talking to the worker.
"And I would like you to make sure that he gets blacklisted in every bar of Yokohama. I think I can count on you, right ?" he asked, but his irritated voice made it clear that it wasn't really a question, but more of an order.
"Of course, sir," answered the barman with a polite smile, who apparently already knew who was the detective.
"Good. We don't want this man to cause any more harm."
"You can't do that !" angrily said the stranger, slamming his hand against the counter. He got up from his chair but when he saw Dazai's and Chuuya's cold stares, he clicked his tongue, "Whatever. I don't care."
"Well, if you don't care, then you'll excuse us but we have to go. Or do you need anything else here, sweetheart ?" Dazai pettily asked.
"No, nothing, let's go." Chuuya answered just as sassily.
The detective smiled and turned away, finally putting his arm away from Chuuya's shoulders. Because ew, right.
He then glanced one last time at the stranger.
"By the way, since you wanted to pay him a glass of wine, I guess you can pay for the one he drank ? Thanks !" he sneakily commanded and, to add more fuel to the fire, he gave him the biggest smile.
They finally got out of the bar after successfully avoiding chaos.
Chuuya was expecting Dazai to dramatically say how much of a hero he was, to be petty.
But he did none of that.
''Thank you for helping. I didn't want to make a fuss in the bar and the Port Mafia."
"I know," Dazai replied, "I'm glad you called me."
Chuuya blinked in surprise.
"Why ?"
"I'm glad that you still trust me enough to help you," he explained, the faint but chill wind softly blowing on his hair. He seemed a little embarrassed at his own answer.
Chuuya tried to see if he was joking.
"Well, I'm glad that I, indeed, still can trust you," he then answered, "that's the bare minimum."
They kept walking in silence, the few street lights keeping them safe from the dark.
Wait, wait a minute.
Was Dazai actually walking him home ?
"Wait, you don't need to walk me home. Moreover, it's very late—"
"It's very late indeed, I won't let you go home alone."
Chuuya felt like he would explode right now, right here.
''Where's Dazai and what did you do to him ?"
"Ohhhh hatrack, don't you think it's rude ? I saved you after all !"
"Nevermind, it's you."
Dazai giggled and Chuuya couldn't suppress his own smile.
Once they've arrived, Chuuya felt almost disappointed. Not that he enjoyed having Dazai's company in a peaceful way for once, of course.
He stared at his door without moving. The detective was about to ask what was wrong, until the smaller man spoke up.
"Do you want to come in ?"
Now, it was Dazai who was surprised.
"...It's my turn to ask who are you and what have you done to Chuuya ?"
Chuuya playfully hit Dazai's arm.
"Don't make it so difficult, just answer ! Like you've said it's late, I'm just worried about you and your weak ass !"
"Okay." breathed out Dazai, still surprised.
Both knew that the ''it's late'' excuse was lame.
If anything, the night and all its monsters were afraid of them.