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Victor slammed the refrigerator door shut, the sound echoing off the walls of the small dorm that he and Eli shared. He was mad. Mostly at himself, for introducing Eli and Angie. Eli, who was easily the most interesting boy he’d ever met, who he’d love to take apart and study the way a watchmaker might study a watch, carefully noting the complexities that made it tick. And Angie, his best friend. He had mattered to both of them, had been important to them, influential even, but that was before, before Victor had to go and ruin everything.
“You can’t date her.”
“I’m sorry, what?” Eli seemed disinterested, not even bothering to put the book he was holding down. This only pissed Victor off more.
“Angie. You can’t date her. She’s my best friend, and you’re my roommate. It would be weird.”
“All due respect, Vale, but why exactly do you care?”
“I don’t. You can do whatever you want, I just think it would be a bad idea, okay?” With every word Victor could feel his voice rising as he became more and more panicked, control over both Eli and Angie slipping out of his fingers.
He stepped closer to the couch where Eli was sitting. Eli finally looked up at him, setting his book down on the coffee table in front of him.
“You obviously do care, what I don’t get is why? It’s not like you want to date her.” Victor was starting to annoy Eli, and when Victor paused before answering his annoyance multiplied by tenfold. Why did Victor have to go and make things so complicated? Why couldn’t he just let Eli be normal? “You don’t want to date her, right?”
“No, Eli, I don’t want to date Angie.” He wasn’t lying, he didn’t want to date Angie. He supposed he loved her, at least in some way, and he wouldn’t mind being the most important person in her life, wouldn’t mind having more control over their relationship. But nothing about a romance with Angie appealed to him.
“If that’s the case then once again, why does it matter if I do? It’s not like you want to date me.” He said it as a joke, but his eyes said the truth, showing the hope behind them.
Now that Victor wasn’t so sure about. He still didn’t think that ‘wanting to date Eli’ was the right way to describe his feelings towards his roommate, but the idea certainly was much more appealing than the idea of dating Angie. The amount of control he would have over Eli if they were dating… He could learn so much about Eli. He could crack him open like a treasure chest and discover all of the secrets hidden inside. But that wasn’t important here, all that mattered was that he kept Eli and Angie away from each other.
“Will you please be serious here, I’m not joking around, I don’t think that you and Angie would work out.”
“Thanks for the input, I’d say I’ll keep that in mind, but I don’t care, especially since you can’t give me even one good reason for why you think that.” He stood up, grabbing his book off the coffee table. “I’m going to my room.”
“Eli wait! Please just promise you’ll listen to me on this one!”
Eli kept walking, electing to ignore Victor.
“Cardale. Look at me when I’m talking to you.”
“You don’t scare me. I said I’m going to my room, so I suggest you leave me alone.”
That made Victor even more mad then he had already been. He should scare Eli. Which is why he stepped even closer to Eli, well within his personal space. It was probably also why he reached out and grabbed the collar of Eli’s shirt, pulling him even closer.
Fear flashed across Eli’s face. Good. Now Victor was getting somewhere.
“Victor,” Eli said, his voice barely above a whisper, “let me go.”
But Victor couldn’t do that. He had Eli’s full attention and he wasn’t going to give that up.
“Ask nicely.”
“The fuck, Vale?” Eli paused, then let out a quiet “please let me go.”
“Better.” Victor’s hand was still clenched tightly onto Eli’s shirt collar. Eli didn’t seem to mind.
The look in Eli’s eyes changed, softening. Victor had the sudden urge to kiss him, just to see what would happen. He wanted to see how Eli would react. And Victor was used to getting what he wanted.
Victor tilted his head forward, closing the few inches between them, quickly forcing their lips together. Eli’s lips were soft, much softer than Victor had expected. Victor had meant for it to be a quick kiss, a test, easily written off and never spoken of again. Then Eli, who was always full of surprises, kissed him back.
Eli had always had a fire in him, one that only Victor could see. Usually it was simmering underneath his surface, but kissing Victor brought that fire to life. Victor’s free hand reached for the short hair at the back of Eli’s neck and pulled. The gasp that Eli let out was electrifying for Victor. He could spend years studying him, discovering what else it took to get him to make more noises like that.
Victor shoved Eli roughly against the hallway wall he was leaning against, using Eli’s surprise to his advantage, taking the opportunity to bite down, hard, on Eli’s bottom lip, drawing another little gasp out of Eli.
Eli was perfectly moldable in Victor’s hands, completely under his control, exactly how Victor wanted him. For the first time he could see the real Eli, he understood who his roommate actually was, past the little glimpses he had seen on the rare occasions Victor had managed to get Eli to let his guard down.
Eventually Victor pulled away, both he and Eli breathing heavily. Eli spoke first.
“I’m sorry, Victor.”
“For what?”
“I can’t do this… We can’t ever talk about this, okay?”
“What do you mean?” Victor didn’t understand. Even after what had just happened, he was still losing control of Eli. Of course he was. “Look we.. we don’t have to be anything.” His voice turned angry. “Why are you leaving me?”
“I’m not leaving you, Victor! I’m not with you.”
“So what, you’re gonna just pretend this never happened?”
“Yeah maybe.” Eli looked sad. “I think I am gonna date Angie.”
“Seriously? Fuck you, Eliot.”
“I’m sorry.” Eli really did look upset, eyes downcast, hands fidgeting with the hem of his shirt in a kind of nervous sadness.
Victor turned around, headed for the door, desperate to put as much space as possible between himself and Eli.