Chapter Text
Someone knocked on Tooru’s door for the nth time that day.
Before he can even ask them to go away, he heard someone speak across the door.
“Tooru, you have to get ready for the gala,” Miko, Tooru’s mom, said. Tooru definitely didn’t expect his mom to come to his flat today.
“What’re you doing here mom? I thought you were already on your Greek holiday with Tsuna and Takeru.” Tooru said as he, once again, rolled around his bed, but still not opening his door.
“Well, Shimizu called me. Of course I had to cancel for you. You have to get ready, Tooru.”
Bloody Shimizu. He really wanted to fire her sometimes, but he knew that she was only doing her job.
He didn’t answer. He didn’t want to go to that hell of an event. He wanted to wallow in despair and cry his eyes out more.
He expected Toshi, his boyfriend for two years, to come with him and be his date tonight, but they once again had a big fight this morning. It was tiring, to say the least, to constantly fight with someone whom you expected to be there and support you.
Maintaining a public career as an international star in the music industry ever since he was fifteen, Tooru had always been careful with whom he associates himself with. This made it hard for him to have romantic relationship of sorts. With all his moves being tracked by paparazzi, both in mainstream media and online, it’s hard to find someone willing to put up with you and your baggage.
Contrary to what the media had been speculating about him, he wasn’t a serial dater at all. Toshi is just his second relationship.
He hoped that Toshi would be the one he would spend the rest of his life with. He hoped that he would understand the nature of his career since he is also in the music industry. Despite their differences in upbringing and personality, they bonded with their shared love for music.
It all turned sour when he was in the middle of his world tour. They started talking less than what they did before. Rumours spread around like wildfire, saying that Toshi had been seen constantly with a certain model around town. He didn’t believe it of course, and Toshi denied it as well. They both talked about not believing everything you see reported on the news before.
Despite all of it, it was evident that things were getting cold. Tooru tried to fix it by flying after his concert in Australia back to London just to spend their second year anniversary together. He thought he’d done well, but apparently not. Ever since then, every conversation almost turned into an argument.
After the world tour, they once again tried to patch things up by going on a vacation together. They decided on a private holiday in the Caribbean. It went well, not until another fight the night before their flight back home. This was when Toshi had enough of everything and finally confessed that he had indeed been unfaithful to Tooru by being with the model he was seen with on those damn paparazzi photos.
But of course Tooru forgave him.
Because he believed that he could change and mistakes happen. Everyone was turning their backs away from him, and Toshi was the only thing he can hold onto.
He thought it was the one last time it would happen, not until that morning.
And it just added to the mountains of problems that Tooru was facing.
“Tooru! If you don’t open this door, I will get the master key and force you out of that bed!” His mom shouted, interrupting his thoughts.
He sighed and climbed out of bed. He had to do it eventually, and he’s pretty sure that his mom would literally drag him out if he didn’t do it himself.
As soon as he opened the door, he was met with his mom’s sad smile.
“Oh my boy.” She cooed and hugged him tightly. Moms’ hugs are the warmest and most calming ones, he reminds himself. It was the comfiest hug despite his mom being a lot shorter than him. “Tell me what happened, sweetie. Maybe over brunch-”
“Can we please just not talk about it, mom?”
“Okay, okay. Not for now.”
-
After a brunch with his mom, he decided to finally get ready.
He still looked like a mess after his shower. His eyes were red and raw from crying, he had massive black under eye circles from sleepless nights full of worrying, and he hadn’t straightened his hair for weeks.
Did he really want to turn up to the met gala looking like shit? He could probably cover everything up with makeup, but it wouldn’t erase the fact that he’d look as boring, unwanted and unloved as ever.
Then, an idea sparked.
He rummaged his medicine cabinet and found a box of hair dye and bleach.
He was totally going to do this.
-
It was a few hours later when Miwa, Tooru’s personal stylist, arrived.
“What in the name of Lord have you done with your hair, Tooru?!” She had exclaimed when she saw his bleached blonde hair.
“It’s a nice change. Also it fits the met gala theme, futuristic.”
She just sighed and did his makeup.
-
Everyone was shocked when they saw Tooru.
It was a contrary to the constant and almost conservative style that he had always sported. Wavy neat natural brown hair, now bleach blonde straight swept to the side.
That night, he walked in the red carpet with his ironed bleach blonde hair, a smoky eye look partnered with dark black lipstick, and an asymmetrical black and silver tuxedo that defined the futuristic theme of the met gala.
Actually, even Tooru was surprised at how brave he was acting.
-
The clothes almost covered up the fact that he turned up to the met gala alone despite being in a relationship. ALMOST.
-
Koushi was shocked.
He was shocked both because of Tooru turning up without Wakatoshi and his avant-garde style.
They were sitting in a round table full of Koushi’s friends. He was very glad to have a friend like Koushi. They’ve met when Tooru was just starting to put out music, and Koushi had already been an established actor. Despite the drastic changes in the past few years, Tooru changing his genre to mainly focus on pop and Koushi deciding to direct more films than star on them, and their ever so busy schedules, they still continued to stay friends. He was especially thankful for his company today.
No one wanted to be seen with Tooru. It seemed like since the infamous drama with Alisa, everyone avoided him like plague.
Koushi, however, said that he didn’t care about what they think and that he still believes in Tooru.
In times like this, he could finally see those people who were worth to keep, and he was somehow glad to find that silver lining amidst all of this.
-
Koushi’s friends seemed to welcome him with open arms.
One in particular had caught his eye. The guy was sitting across him. His hair was black and buzz cut, and his eyes were the prettiest olive green. He had seen the guy in a couple of feature and indie films, but he couldn’t put a name to the face.
He was timid and attentive. He listened to anyone who was speaking and added his thoughts into the rolling conversation. Tooru can’t seem to look him straight in the eye during the rare times that he talked. He couldn’t even seem to participate in the conversation, almost afraid to make a fool of himself in front of this gorgeous man.
Everyone in the table had drinks. It was the liquid courage that Tooru needed that night. For what reason? He doesn’t know either. After a few rounds, almost everyone had left to dance on the dance floor. Tooru even danced with Koushi. He was definitely tipsy at that point.
Back at their table, he noticed the black haired guy, sitting alone and scrolling on his phone.
“What is he doing alone there?” Tooru asked Koushi, pointing at him.
Koushi squinted his eyes at where he’s pointing at before answering, “Oh, you mean Hajime. Well, he’s not really the party-type, let alone a dancer. I’m sure he’s fine.”
“I think I’ll join him back.” Tooru said and walked back to the table.
Koushi just shrugged and shouted a faint ‘have fun’ throughout the flood of noise.
-
“You have such a weird accent,” Tooru said as he sat on the empty seat beside Hajime.
Hajime almost dropped his phone in surprise and it just made Tooru giggle.
“Oh, Tooru. You surprised me. I’ll take that as a compliment though.” Hajime said as he put his phone away in his pocket.
“It definitely is a compliment. I can’t place what it is but it’s endearing.” Tooru said as he tried not to giggle. The whiskey was definitely helping him here. “Where from the north are you from?”
“We moved around a lot as a kid. But I’m mostly now staying in Manchester.” Hajime said with a soft smile.
“I’ve performed there for a few shows, it was nice.”
“It is,” Hajime had said. He looked at him with another smile, and then frowned as if realising something. “Uh, you turned up alone. Aren’t you with that DJ Toshi? Oh, uh sorry. That was intrusive.”
“It’s fine. I think I’m going to break up with him soon anyway. He’s in a club doing God knows what, said that he’d rather dance with a bunch of strangers than be my date tonight.”
“That’s awful. I’m sorry,” Hajime said with a frown.
“Hey, stop saying sorry. Not your fault,” Tooru said as he took another sip of his whisky.
“I love your music, by the way. I think your Darkest Black album deserved that Grammy.” Hajime said, changing the topic completely.
“Thank you. I’ve long since accepted that not everything I make would be appreciated by everyone.”
“Yup, just like Muse. They deserve more love and support for their music. I’m glad you spoke out about that.”
With that, their conversation rolled by easily. It made Tooru long for such a connection with someone. Being able to talk freely about your interests and passions without the burden of everyone prying on you, or the constant feeling that they don’t actually appreciate you for who you are but only for that persona that they see on media.
Then he realised that he totally liked this guy. With his gorgeous green eyes, quirky personality and nerdy interests. It was weird, they’ve only talked for a few hours. For all he know, Hajime might be in a relationship right now and he was just being friendly. He might not even swing that way.
Dare he say, he was already jealous of this man’s special person—whether they exist or not.
-
The morning after the met gala, despite his massive hangover, Tooru immediately broke up with Toshi.
Like every other thing that he does, news spread like wildfire. By lunch, every headline in media was about him and Toshi’s break up.
His phone constantly kept ringing. There were a bunch of emails and texts from Shimizu asking him about damage control and releasing of official statements.
He just wanted to pause and stop life for a moment, thus he turned his phone off.
Even after everything Toshi has done, breaking up with him felt like losing a limb, a constant in his life for two years.
He wanted to confide with someone, but he didn’t want to disturb anyone. His mom, sister, and nephew are finally on their Greek holiday. His dad is probably busy with work. Kenma, his best friend, is probably asleep since its night time in Japan. Koushi had had enough of him last night, he probably wants to take a rest today and spend time with Daichi.
He wish he had brought his cats with him, but they had to stay at home.
-
It was a few days later on the plane back to home, when he noticed a receipt sticking out of his wallet.
At the back of the receipt, a phone number was written in blue ink, followed by Hajime’s name and a poor attempt at drawing a smiley face.
It was the first time that Tooru had smiled truthfully in three days.