Chapter Text
Crossposted from fic and rp blog.
*whacks that X button* amuse me, I'm sleep deprived and haven't yet had my morning coffee
Asked by silvertonguedaggermaw
(This has a recording of Starscream by Max of TF: Rise Up!: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1aYpSIEC826l2mRtDdg-3ORz-tRXFfJlS/view?usp=sharing)
“With pleasure.” Starscream smirks at the message from Silvermaw, one of Soundwave’s adopted humans, now an uploaded mind inhabiting various drone bodies.
There’s a few down dethawed insecticon grubs writhing around in the bowl in front of khyr.
Kha decides to open up the Sparkling Livestream channel. Instead of cute seeker babies, this time around….its just shrieking and panicking insecticon grubs. They try to wriggle out of the bowl
Starscream grins at the camera.
“Hello to my audience, you’re here for a very special treat. It’s rare you get to see the Cybertronian ecosystem in action, with the loss of our home planet and the devastation of its ecosystem.” Starscream sounds sad as kha says this, and then kha sounds jubiliant.
"Luckily for us, my titan-ship and home, the Nemesis was retrofitted into a colony ship and it can spawn all manner of life forms to recreate our lost homeland.
This before me, is the larval stage of wild insecticons. Yes, I had my ship spawn these, little shits just for this. Of course, many of you are descended from humans who suffered underneath their cruel claws. And to you my dear human watchers, I dedicate this stream to you.
A mukbang episode of Sparkling Livestream!”
Starscream spears a screaming grub as khyr face-plates split open into an endless abyss of grinding wheels, spinning fangs, and sharp pincing mandibles.
i press X and reccommend turning the unfortunate grub into a burrito
Asked by sleeveev
“Hello viewers, on this episode of Sparkling Livestream: I shall be consuming these delicious grubs in burritos!!!”
On screen, Starscream is shown chopping rubber, and crushing diamond, along with shaving metals. Grubs whimper in a cage on the counter.
They are then pulled out.
The insecticon grubs all scream as Screamer magnetizes them, soaks them in red energon, and then rolls them in metal shavings as a form of pseudo-lettuce. Finely chopped rubber gets sprinkled on top of them along with a smattering of crushed diamond.
The grubs wail as Lord Doctor Doctor Starscream then swaddles them in rubber mats. They look very cute and then Starscream splits khyr face open for the eating.
Yaki udon noodles with a side of sparkling
Asked by Anonymous
On screen, Starscream is shown cooking in the kitchens of the Nemesis. Steelsilk is being rolled up into noodle shapes and then boiled in a pot of heated energon.
Grubs scream in their crate as Starscream smiles on camera, as kha hones khyr claws on the kitchen scratching post.
Several thick wire-tree branches are pulled out of storage and then sliced with Screamer’s finely honed talons.
The Frumbles, Laserbeak, Buzzsaw , Squawktalk, Howlback, Wingthing, and Sundor watch hungrily. With zoomed in optics, all their maws are open with flared out mandibles as they drool out lubricant for their grinding wheels and saws.
“Hello viewers, today on this episode of Sparkling Livestream, I shall be making a cybertronian version of Yaki Udon noodles, with a side of grub. As you can see, my creations are very hungry….”
The episode proceeds with Screamer pulling out a very large pan, along with Earth oil. Kha twists the neck of the grubs, slices them up and then stir-frys the grub slices with the wire-tree. There’s some pleased noises as kha samples the offlined grubs during the cooking.
The noodles are then dumped in along with red energon sauce.
Starscream intends on overclocking Soundwave’s brood and then dumping the batch of hellions on zir.
X! Insecticon Satay, let's feed the Screamer!
Asked by artsy-hobbitses
“SCREE, SCREE, ONE OF MY FAVORITE ARTISTS SENT IN A REQUEST FOR ANOTHER GRUB MUKBANG EPISODE!!!” TC’s optics are wild with fan-glee, for Artsy-Hobbitses is known for their intense humanformer AU. Granted, its often pro-autobot, but its fanfic so who cares?
Starscream smirks and then looks at the request.
“Hello, and thank you for the request. This special episode is dedicated to Oni, and her Ties That Bind RPF AU. While I find her autobot art distasteful, I do enjoy her humanized versions of me. Quite lovely.”
—
On screen, offlined grubs are stuck onto skewers and then grilled on a giant barbeque pit outside in the NEST base. NEST peacekeepers mill around and grill and bbq their own food.
They watch Starscream’s grilling with a mixture of amusement, disgust, and bafflement. None are going to pick a fight with the 63-feet tall roosterhen asshole jet over khyr tastes in cuisine.
Starscream smiles to khyrself and hums an ancient Vosian cooking song as kha slathers the roasted grubs with energon sauce, said energon sauce is mixed with all manners of additives, bismuth, crushed diamond, rubies, and then mixed with a lovely swirl of mercury.
Skywarp and TC loaf and lounge around in the background as their various creations climb and slide down their plating.
The livestream zooms in as everyone chows down.
LISTEN RS STARSCREAM CAN CALLOUT POST ME ANY DAY FOR BEING PRO AUTOBOT SHDHDJJFFFF clearly I’ll just have to make it up to him by drawing more human pinups of him :’B
Also y’all go check out RS Screamer’s sparkling mukbang if you’re into some dark comedy 😂
Starscream smirks at the reblog and fawns at the attention. “Just a friendly reminder, my pronouns are kha/khyr. And of course, all your humanformer Starscream art is hung up in my aerie on the walls.”
Khyr face darkens. “Even the windscream art. As personally abominable as I find it, the art quality is too good and flattering for me to not include.”
On screen, Starscream drops in a promo link to Oni’s RPF and commission info - https://tiesthatbind-tf.tumblr.com/
And a link to all the sparkling mukbhang episodes - https://voidwingsprime.tumblr.com/tagged/grub%20mukbang%20episode
Starscream slurps up another grub and then flashes biolights and does wingspeak as kha speaks to Oni on camera non-verbally due to khyr maw currently being full of tasty baby.
There’s subtitles: “When the next installment of reparations funding comes in from the UN, expect some commissions.”
Have you ever heard of minestrone soup? Maybe that's one to try out
On stream, there’s a boiling pot of heated energon, offlined grubs, along with chopped up rubber tires, sliced up wire trees and solar panels.
Starscream can be seen on camera tapping at khyr work station in the background as kha works on organizing khyr notes on the human reaction to grub eating.
The chat is currently having a debate on the xenoethics on eating babies.
XXXXXXX
After the meals of grub satay, grub udon, grub soup, grub burritos, and the strange sparklings from other timelines, Starscream is full.
Kha is currently recharging inside of Thundercracker and tangled up in a sleepy pile with Skywarp and the rest of their creations.
Their data dreams are full of satisfying remixes on how they all tasted. Consuming nothing but energon and scrap metal gets tiring.