Chapter Text
Izuku was tired. Tired of the thoughts, tired of the stares, tired of just being here. He couldn't go anywhere without glares, couldn't do anything without the thoughts, the intrusive ones. The ones telling him what he has known all along, That he's-
pathetic
a loser
a traitor
an unworthy successor
that he's a useless Deku
Don't get him wrong he's always had these thoughts deep down but now somethings different. Now it's not only his thoughts saying it but his classmates too.
They think he's creepy
weird
a stalker
a villain
the traitor
Some cower around him but some do the opposite. They taunt and tease, and it's middle school all over again. They destroyed all of his notebooks, tore his possessions to fragments of what they were, and tore him the same way. His teachers do it too, he should have known better than to trust them. He got comfortable, let his guard down, and this is where it led him. They do the same as Aldera, UA is a carbon copy of Aldera. They fail me, don't stop the teases and taunts, actually, I think I have seen midnight sensei smirk while it was happening. The same as Aldera. He's tired. He has gone through this for weeks and he can't do it anymore. In class he doesn't listen, he just follows his routine. He goes into class first head down and says nothing. He sits down at his desk with his head still down and only ups his view slightly when they begin. In the beginning it was hard, he had to try not to mumble and not to take notes, it was painful. Now its normal, he knows he cant and won't do those things, cant being literal he cant mumble or write without crying, without thinking of before. Before they all thought he was creepy and weird and a villain. Then after class izuku would usually head to the dorms and stay in his room for the night but as he said today is different. Today izuku was no more. Today there was only Deku. Deku bolted out of the classroom when the bell rang.
Left
right
Left
Right
Left
Right
Midoriya izuku Deku says those words over and over synchronizing with his footsteps. He walks down the long corridor and up the stairs.
Up left
Up right
Up left
Up right
Then he goes to open the door. At first, he hesitates “do I really want to do this” but then they retaliate.
Of course, you do.
You're worthless.
Quirkless
A nobody
A problem child
No one wants you around
Not even all might
That’s when he decides that there is no turning back and turns the door handle. A gush of air greets him. When he was younger, when no one had received their quirk yet, he would have described it as refreshing, like a hug from nature. Now, after all, he's been through, it's chilling and hurtful. It's unpleasant, it wants him to leave like everyone else in his life
Worthless
Quirkless
Deku
Not even a rooftop wants you, how sad is that
He starts counting his steps this time. He's been here before he knows how many it takes, 24.
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He takes off his faded yellow backpack. It had been through so much. The burns from kacchan, the tosses out windows and onto beds. Today it will just sit here, getting to rest just as much as me. Before he continues to walk he opens it and takes out cursed notebook #13
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He takes off his UA uniforms jacket, surprisingly nothing changes not even the temperature, and if it wasn’t supposed to feel that way, if in reality the air dropped 10 degrees cooler he couldn’t feel it. He couldn’t feel anything, he was focused.
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He takes off his shoes. They are blood bright red. The only colour nobodys like him can get. The only kind and colour the quirkless can get, accommodated for his extra joint and wider feet. Another reminder of who he is and will always be, even in death.
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Izuku Deku still has his notebook in hand with a pen attached. He writes notes to all he can think of, not like they will read them anyways. Kacchan, Aizawa sensei, all might, Uraraka, Iida…Todoroki..
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The thoughts follow him on the way
Why don’t you take a swan dive off the roof.
If only he could but he can't even do that, he has to settle for a small jump. As gentle as a bunny, as fragile as glass. Izuku thought everyone knew it was bad luck to break glass, but maybe… he was wrong.
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