Chapter Text
In a residential area in Tokyo there is a certain house. At a glance it’s just a normal house, exactly the same as every other one on the street. Just looking at it nobody would be able to tell that it is the current residence of one of the most powerful, and most evil, gods in existence.
Said god is also one of the most lazy.
She is in this house, in this world, because she is lazy. It’s a “vacation spot” as she skips out of her job of managing the underworld. This god is known as D.
And as her boss it’s my job to bring her back.
Teleporting into the house I see her beautiful form sitting at a desk with various gaming consoles and what a first glance looks like a human soul on it. Though looking at it for more than a second It’s clear that it is not a human soul.
To most people, even most divine beings, I would be imperceptible. Only being noticed when I want to be noticed. So It says something about how powerful she is that as soon as I entered the room she looks up from what she was doing with the soul and stares at me with her expressionless face.
“Darn.” she says completely monotone.
“Hello D. I’m here to take you back now.”
She picks up the controller for her game console and the character on screen, A buff looking bald man, effectively throws a tantrum.
Still in monotone she says “How did you find me? I was careful not to use my power in detectable ways, you shouldn’t have found me out.”
“I sensed a large blast of energy heading towards this planet, But when it got here it barely caused any damage. There are few gods who can trivialize attacks like that and you being you my first thought was to check your station and sure enough you weren’t there. Though your decoy was more convincing this time it was only a matter of time before I found you here.”
She makes her game character do a thinking pose, and while she remains perfectly expressionless she talks to herself. “That planet has recovered a lot… I should have anticipated other gods would notice that energy. Stupid hero and demon lord ruining my vacation.”
She must be talking about one of her ‘sources of entertainment’. I don’t usually care about D’s little pet projects but I must admit it’s very satisfying that one of them came back to bite her in the end.
Well… I say I don’t care but I keep finding myself staring at the soul on her desk. It’s not of a human but it’s unlike anything else, and deep inside it I feel a similar aura too the evil god whose desktop its placed on.
“What is that?” I ask pointing to the strange soul.
“Oh the maid is curious is she? Maybe you aren’t just a meathead. I guess I can tell you about it since it won’t be of any use now.”
She proceeded to explain the false identity she took on this planet, how the energy blast destroyed the classroom she was in, how she reincarnated the people in the class into the world were the blast came from for her own amusement, and how she needed a soul to take the place of her false identity to maintain the illusion that it was real so she wouldn’t get caught playing hooky.
To that end she took the soul of a spider that was also in the classroom and added her own, though altered, memories to it as well as gave it more power so that it has the volume of a human soul.
“I guess this is the part where I say ‘And I would have gotten away with it if it weren’t for that meddling demon lord and hero!’” She says as her on screen avatar does a laughing gesture.
“Well I all that’s left to do with this is to send it too where the other reincarnations are.” Despite her total lack of outward emotions you can still tell she’s getting enjoyment out of bringing these souls to a world of her rules.
As she starts reaching for the soul I grab her, open a portal back to the underworld office, and throw her into it. The throw leaves her body completely torn and broken, though to someone like D that is not even a minor concern. I close the portal.
Honestly after ditching her post and no doubt causing a massive work backup there’s no way I’m letting her do something that would bring her amusement. Is this petty? Yes. But it’s D so fuck her.
Now It’s just me and the soul. I need to reincarnate this soul but it’s so mutated that it wouldn’t fit as an earth spider anymore. I have to find somewhere for it to fit. I look through the cosmos with my mind to find somewhere with compatible organisms but I run into a problem.
All planets with compatible organisms are either under the jurisdiction of Angels, and I am not getting in a fight with angels just for one soul, or under D’s influence. I don’t want to have D use it for her entertainment so I guess I’ll have to look through parallel universes Instead.
It doesn’t take long to find what I’m looking for. The universe N3 has so many compatible species it’s almost funny, and there are no gods there to even notice a extra soul.
I send the soul to a random compatible creature about be born and that’s that.
///////////////
Gaaahhh!
“Skreeeee!”
I tried to scream just now but all managed to do was make a weird chirping noise.
What happened?!
One moment I was sitting, read dosing off, in class and then suddenly I feel an intense pain. Now it’s pitch black, my body feels weird, and I can’t move at all!
***
Huh? Did I hear something?
*boom*
Was that a gunshot or something!?
*BOOM*
*CRASH*
*RAAaAaAAA*
What the hell!? It sounds like a war zone out there! Did the school become the target for a terrorist attack!?
No Way!!!
I have to get out of here! Although I currently can’t seem to move my body so I don’t know how likely escape is. Come to think of it I feel covered by some hard surface, did an explosion bury me in rubble!?
Odds of survival are dropping by the second, I can’t let it end like this! I’ve barely lived!
Well that’s a depressing thought. I’ve spent most of my life just simply existing, I don’t really have a relationship with my parents, even now I barely remember their faces. I only went to school for appearances sake, I never had any friends, never was passionate about learning anything, and I was generally not interacted with except for when that Mirei girl was bullying me. I never bothered with good food, only getting store bought box lunches and stuff I could just microwave or boil.
The only thing I was ever passionate about was video games. My best achievement was grinding a my free to play character in an MMO, a buff bald guy, to max level. Well not only that but also giving him a speed based build that most players can’t seem to use properly. Baldy was kind of a legend in that game thanks to me.
I wonder… If I die here will people miss Baldy more than anyone will miss me?
No! This is Unacceptable! I’m going to get out of here and live damn it! I’m not going to die having only lived a small, admittedly pathetic, life!
I struggle to move despite the stuff covering me and eventually my head brushes up against another surface.
This surface seems to be weaker than the others! Maybe I can push through and escape! Although it’s very concerning that I couldn’t feel any of my limbs while I was moving, all I can feel is my head and body. Oh god I hope that my limbs aren’t unusable now.
*BOOOOOOOOOOOMMM*
Jesus Christ! That blast was waaaay bigger than the others! All the other sounds seem to stop after that earth shattering kaboom. I have to get out NOW!
It takes a solid minute of pushing but the surface is finally starting to give! Pushing with my head is very awkward and uncomfortable but it’s not like I have any other options here! Almost there! Almost there!
And then suddenly I burst out with much more force then I realized. I also seem to be upright which is weird because I was certain I was on the ground earlier. But that minor confusion is nothing compared what I am seeing right now.
Colour. The first thing that jumps out at me right now is the colour. What am I talking about you ask? What is so special about colour? The room I’m in seems to have nothing but colours I’ve never seen before. Colours that should be impossible!
Honestly I have no idea what I’m looking at right now! Just looking at the walls, which incidentally seem to look made of rocks with fleshy growths on them, is overwhelming because I’m seeing something that no human should ever see! I don’t know how to describe what I’m seeing at all, How do you describe a colour that humans can’t see? It looks completely alien, and it’s not even the only thing weird with my vision right now.
I can see more than usual. I mean that literally, my field of vision is so wide! The room I’m in is very big and tall, it also seems more and more like a cave the more I look at it, but I can see the floor, ceiling, both walls, and everything in between without having to move my head.
To be honest I am freaking out right now. What I’m seeing seems to give me a headache, though even that is weird! My head doesn’t physically hurt but it’s like my mind is overwhelmed with the new experiences. It’s so bad that I barely notice the humanoid figure in the corner of my vision, which is almost directly behind me, before I start to collapse.
*Thud*
Ouch.
“Skree.”
Oh great I’m still making chirping noises. I honestly just want to lie here until my brain can process all this new stimulation, but unfortunately with an unknown person behind me in a strange situation I basically have no choice but to get up and get my bearings.
Though I guess I can turn around while still laying here to look at the other person. I’ll get up and run if it looks like I’m in danger.
When I turn around I see a giant armoured figure that seems to have a large glowing arm canon aimed directly at me!
Oh hell! I immediately force myself to get up and notice another strange thing going on with me. When getting up my body doesn’t actually move, I seem to just float up in the same position I was laying down in.
If it wasn’t obvious already something is seriously wrong with me. Fortunately I’m about to get an answer to why. Unfortunately the answer is not anything good.
I look at the scary armoured person who has a strange suit that looks like it came straight from a Sci-Fi series. Looking It over my gaze falls on their helmet, and I realize two things. One, looking through their visor it turns out the scary armoured person is a scary armoured lady, and more importantly Two, from the reflection of her visor I see myself.
And I’m some kind of weird jellyfish monster with fangs!? Unbelievable! Am I really this weird thing? I move to the side slightly and sure enough the reflection moves too. If that wasn’t enough confirmation the armour lady shifts her canon arm slightly so it still aims at me.
Well no use denying reality, I have to accept that I am now this jellyfish thing. Though that just raises even more questions!
Why am I a jellyfish? I’m pretty sure I’m not underwater so why can I float? Who is the lady in the suit pointing a gun at me? Where am I? It looks like some kind of cave, but The fleshy growths are like nothing on earth. How did I get here? Beneath me there are the remains of an egg, is that what I came out of?
Did I die and get reborn? It was a popular genre of fiction at home so it’s not to crazy. Wait, if I died and was Isekai-ed...
That means during all that struggling to escape and gathering my will to live I was already dead! No way, this sucks! All that effort was pointless!
Well I still meant what I thought in there! I’ll live this new life to the fullest even if I am a jellyfish! Though I guess the first order of business on that front is to not die immediately by way of arm canon.
No but seriously what’s the big idea lady! Who points a gun at a freshly hatched baby whatever I am! Are you some kind of psycho!?
“Skreeee! Chir Chir Skreeee!”
She keeps her aim on me.
I float from side to side in annoyance. I know she can’t understand me but come on it’s common sense that pointing a weapon a someone is extremely rude!
Maybe if I show her I’m not a threat she’ll let up, though I’m already nowhere near a threat. I mean what kind of damage could a baby blob with dull fangs even do?
Nevertheless I lower myself down to the ground so that my fangs touch the cave floor. Maybe if I make myself seem cute she won’t shoot? To be honest my new body is kind of ugly, especially with the veins going between my impossible coloured skin and my red ‘cores’, but maybe I’m just ugly enough that I can be considered pathetically cute? I’ll try to make cute noises.
“Skree... chir chu Skreee...”
Did that do it? Just after I think that her arm canon glows much less! Am I safe now?
Miss armour kneels down and reaches out to me with her not gun arm. Is she trying to pet me?! I’m a bit uncomfortable with physical contact but if it means I won’t get shot I won’t complain.
... Ok despite the hand being covered in metal the pet actually felt really nice.
Once she’s done petting me I float back up to eye level. We just stare at each other for a while so It’s kind of awkward now. Does she expect me to do something? I’m a baby for crying out loud! I don’t have any clue what I should be doing!
Oh man I have no clue what I should be doing! How am supposed to live as this thing?! Should I just live in this cave like an animal? I mean that could be appealing in in it’s own way but no thanks. Plus I don’t know what I am, what I can eat, if this is even my natural habitat, if I have any natural predators, the list goes on.
Maybe I should stick with Miss armour? I mean she is a human under there, maybe I can find a way to communicate with her? And maybe she can take care of me for a while since I don’t know anything about my biology.
I cautiously float closer to her. She points her canon at me but thankfully it doesn’t get that intense glow again. I float up and down slowly to reassure her. Honestly this is pretty annoying, how much do you need to think I’m no threat?
Finally she seems to get the message. She starts to move forward, going past me a bit and then gesturing for me to follow.
Yes! I might be completely lost in a strange Sci-Fi world with a weird body I don’t understand any of the functions of, but I feel if I stick with Miss Armour than everything is going to work out fine!