Chapter Text
[Greetings, Host! This System would like to welcome you to the world of ‘Proud Immortal Demon Way’, we hope you ca-]
The Google Translate voice cuts off abruptly with a jarring mechanical beep.
System? Proud Immortal Demon Way? And what do you mean ‘welcome’? Shen Yuan is pretty sure he just died .
The System cuts back in with another loud beep.
[Error detected. Intended role ‘Shen Qingqiu’ unavailable due to unforeseen circumstances.]
Intended role?!? Shen Qingqiu!?! Ahh, System, do you want your host to die again so soon?
[Backup procedures activated. Host will be transferred to an NPC role. We hope you can still-]
Another harsh error noise.
[Unable to locate role within appropriate distance to the protagonist. System entering remote mode. Good luck, Host!]
Huh??? Who ever heard of getting downgraded by a System? What a shitty service! The Host demands a refund!
Shen Yuan feels a strange tugging sensation over his whole body, and everything goes black.
—
He kind of expects a welcoming party. At least one person to introduce him to his new role, to exclaim about how he was so close to death , and you really scared us!, all those other clichés.
Instead, he wakes up sprawled in the dirt, completely alone.
He picks himself up, looking around as he dusts himself off. It looks like he’s in the middle of a pretty standard bamboo forest. Well, standard for a cultivation novel. Also standard are his artfully threadbare robes and the ridiculously long hair he can feel brushing against his neck.
What is not standard is his absolute lack of guidance on what the fuck he’s supposed to do now.
System? He questions in his mind, could I get some pointers here?
Naturally, there’s no response. With Shen Yuan’s luck, the stupid thing is glitched out completely.
He scours the area again, hoping to find something useful. Under a bush, he finds a half spilled basket of vaguely medicinal looking plants. As he pokes through them, he recognizes several that are useful for treating wounds, some for minor illnesses, and few mild cultivation enhancers. Of course, because this is Proud Immortal Demon Way, about two thirds of them also double as aphrodisiacs.
Useful, but also worrying, because this body was obviously doing something before the System shoved him in here.
Well, no use worrying about it now. He’s in Proud Immortal Demon Way! The monsters alone are almost worth dying for!
—
Liu Qingge has enjoyed fighting and killing monsters his entire life. He’s saved towns from rogue demons, hunted monsters for parts, and gleefully picked fights with the biggest, toughest creatures he could find.
Naturally, in this line of work, he’s also had the misfortune of meeting some of the most idiotic people conceivable.
Like the idiot he’s saving right now.
Any child with any sense at all knows not to approach a Jewel-Throated Weasel den and expect to come out in one piece.
But here’s this fully grown man , picking his way across the piles of mangled bones and singed fur, pausing to slip brightly colored stones into a basket.
Gritting his teeth, Liu Qingge tries to plan an escape route. If he flies down on his sword, there’s still a chance the man will struggle and alert the monsters. Unfortunately, it’s the best plan he has.
He smoothly pulls Cheng Luan from its sheath and hops on. Narrowing his eyes, he aims for the brainless man and takes off, wind whipping his ponytail.
Thankfully, he manages to get one arm around the man’s waist and clamps the other over his mouth, muffling any potential noises. The man does struggle, and he’s stronger than he looks. Liu Qingge has to fight to keep them both on the sword.
When they hit solid ground, the man shoves him away and rounds on him.
“What do you think you’re doing?!” he clutches his basket to his chest like a scandalized village girl, “Who just grabs people like that??”
Liu Qingge is too busy gaping at his face.
“Shen Qingqiu?!?”
--
Oh, fuck no. Seriously System!?!? You couldn’t be more original than sticking him in a copy of the scum villain?
He just met this man, and he’s already glaring at him! Shen Yuan gives his ‘rescuer’ his best poker face.
“No,” he says, crossing his arms, “Who’s that?”
The cultivator blinks at him. Nailed it.
“You’re…not Shen Qingqiu?”
He looks terribly confused. Shen Yuan nods. Me and you both, dude .
The man narrows his eyes at him.
“What is your name, then?”
Shit. Does this NPC have a name? Probably not, right?
“Shen…Yuan?” It comes out like a question. Yup, totally not suspicious behavior. Just a normal guy over here, with his tenuous identity and apparently alarming resemblance to one of the most reviled characters in this universe.
Speaking of characters, this guy has to be someone important. He’s ridiculously pretty, for one, like he came straight out of a drama. It kind of undercuts the whole scowl-y thing he has going on. Also, his clothes look like sect robes. Expensive sect robes.
Before he can ask, the man crosses his arms and says, “Only an idiot would go into a monster’s den unarmed.”
Well that’s…direct. And also, hey!
“I know what I’m doing,” he protests, fishing some of the gems out of his basket. “Look! I only took the red ones.”
At the cultivator’s blank look, Shen Yuan explains, “They’re color bli-, um, they can’t see the red ones very well, so you can take them if you’re careful.”
The man carefully takes one from Shen Yuan’s hand and raises an eyebrow at it.
“What do they do?”
Shen Yuan shuffles his feet, embarrassed, “Oh, they don’t do anything.”
His brow furrows, “Then why do you want it?”
“Well,” he says, a little more animated, “the Jewel-Throated Weasel creates these gems by condensing and superheating the organic material it eats in its stomach--it can’t digest the gems, so it regurgitates them and leaves them with the rest of its food waste--which is also why it breathes fire--and you can’t take all the gems because they arrange the waste in piles on purpose--although it’s not clear whether it actually cares about aesthetics or not--”
Most of his explanation is done in one excited rambling breath. Whoops. The man blinks at him again.
Shen Yuan sighs. “I just think they’re interesting.”
The man nods slowly and gingerly places the gem back in Shen Yuan’s palm.
There is a brief moment of hesitation, and then. “It is getting dark. I will escort you home.”
Well, that’s…
Very sweet, and Shen Yuan might normally take him up on that.
But unfortunately he doesn’t know where home is . He actually doesn’t know if he has one?
“Um,” he stalls, “I’m…traveling…at the moment.”
A tense silence.
“So…I’m not…going anywhere?”
Another blank stare, then his brow furrows, “You don’t have a place to stay?”
Yes, technically, that is what he’s saying. He was kind of just planning on roughing it tonight? It’s not like he has money for an inn.
Before Shen Yuan can come up with a response, the cultivator seems to come to a decision.
“Camp with me tonight.”
Uhh. Sure. Not entirely sure where this sense of responsibility is coming from, but Shen Yuan isn’t going to say no to a warm fire, and possibly even food.
But what comes out of his mouth is-
“Ok. Um. I don’t know your name.”
The man frowns again, more to himself than at Shen Yuan.
“Liu Qingge.”
WHAT.