Archive of Our Own

It begins like this: he grabs his favourite navy blue silken necktie rolled underneath a glass compartment, his toast is then lightly baked and topped with jam and peanut, afterwards he wears the brown loafer shoes that are neatly pointed towards the door. Then he leaves exactly at 7:55AM to reach work by 8:30PM.

Jeno enjoys his life, to put it simply— systematic. Everything should be organised. When everything is right in place, he wouldn’t have to fall behind. There’s an unspoken routine he follows rather strictly (though he has his own cheat days) and anything out of the ordinary would make him feel unsettled. 

Which is why having his colleague, Lee Mark, call him early during his shift throws him off.

“Yo Jen, could you check the basement and get the person to remove the cart near the cargo lift? We are receiving reports that their items are supposedly blocking the pathway.”

Jeno sighs as he puts his phone to his ear, making his inspections around the airport. It’s the weekend so the crowd of travellers is a bit hectic, but nothing beyond his control. “Why me? I’m on duty at the second level.” 

“Yes!” Mark’s voice sounds eerily cheerful from the other end. “But Dejun left for the washroom a few minutes back and he said it’s gonna take, you know…. long. Anyway! You’re the closest to the basement right now. Go Go.”

“Fine…” Jeno grumbles, hanging up.

Perhaps it kind of comes with the job, but Jeno has been actively keeping fit through his daily tasks. Afterall, he’s a security guard. He learns the route of the places by heart, memorises every exit at the back of his mind, and is trained on his ten toes to respond to any emergencies.

He finally reaches the basement and looks around for the source of complaints when he hears a loud shriek out of nowhere.

“Ahh!!”

Instinctively, Jeno runs towards the direction of the noise only to see a couple of boxes toppled all over the floor. Standing beside it is presumably the owner of this predicament.

“Oh no, I’m gonna be late!” The other male whines in frustration, quickly bending over to pick the fallen boxes.

“Hey, um,” Jeno hastily interrupts. His height towers over the former’s crouched figure and his dark shadow looms like a cloak. “We do not allow the public to use this elevator here actually.”

The other male perks his head up almost in slow motion, calculating his doom before blinking excessively in embarrassment. “S-Sorry! Actually I’m a vendor here… Today’s my first day so I’m not too familiar with this place… and one of the wheels is busted…”

“Vendors can use another accessible lift at the back. It’s much more spacious and safer than the public elevator for your goods. But this area is out of bounds to non-staff personnels.”

“I’m sorry again…”

“Let me help you with them,” Jeno offers to pick up some boxes and wonders why they feel surprisingly not as heavy as he expected. Jaemin then hauls half of them back to the platform trolley. “I’ll show you the way. Come on.”

The walk is a little stiff and quiet as they arrive at the lobby, the only ruckus coming from the wheels scraping the floors of the car park. Time to time, Jeno notices the other male gazing at him from the sides, out of… curiosity? Anguish? Anticipation? He doesn’t really know either. But he doesn’t probe further and continues with his duty.

“You’re strong…” Jaemin murmurs in wonder.

“Huh?” Jeno peeks from behind the stack of 3 boxes he’s carrying. “Oh, these packages are pretty lightweight though.”

When they finally reach the fourth level where all the local cart shops are located, the other male takes out a piece of paper and his eyebrows are furrowed amusingly.

“Which booth are you headed to?” Jeno tries to enquire.

“Booth 41!”

Jeno nods in understanding. “It’s on the 3rd row over there.”

They head over and find the big empty cart that’s waiting for the owner. Hanging off the roof, is a wooden shop name plate that Jeno reads as ‘Jaemin’s Teddy Bear Palace’.

“Teddy… bear palace?” Jeno unconsciously mouths out before he can stop himself. 

He momentarily freezes. It’s almost rare that he engages in idle talk during work hours, and he contemplates the next string of words before the other person beats him to it.

“Yeah! That’s what I sell!” The male, whom Jeno now identifies as probably Jaemin, beams proudly. “The soft toy and doll clothes!”

“Are these inspired by something?” Jeno continues, feeling a bit relaxed by the flow of their conversation.

“By the teddy bear museum, yeah! I enjoyed going there as a kid. I was so fascinated seeing so many of them lined up in one place,” Jaemin unzips his luggages as he starts to set up his empty cart. Assorted soft teddy bears are arranged, of various colours, donned in different costumes. 

There is also a pair that resembles the couple from the famous historical Korean drama Goong, dressed in royal princess and prince outfits. Then, Jeno sees a teddy bear dressed in a monochrome sailor outfit, and another mini version with a bib.

How cute.

“Ah…” Jeno scratches the back of his neck bashfully. He starts recalling some fond memories from his childhood, seeing all the toys displayed before him. It feels refreshing to talk about something that was carefree, rather than any adult responsibilities. It feels even more refreshing when the other person accepts your sentiment. “I kinda liked going there before. They would have a tour around the museum too.”

“Yes, the tour was my favourite part! Wow… who knows we might have crossed paths as kids,” Jaemin flashes a warm grin and when he fixes the lamp on his cart, his beam brightens even more.

“That could be possible.”

Jeno proceeds to check his wrist watch, and shit, he thinks he’s way past his schedule. It’s almost 12pm and he’s supposed to make his rounds at the top foyer since 15 minutes ago.

“I gotta go, it’s still working hours right now.”

“Oh, of course!” Jaemin bows profusely in order to express his gratitude. “Thank you for guiding me here, Sir.”

“Jeno is fine. Aren’t we like the same…. age?”

“Jeno. Jeno,” Jaemin repeats to himself quietly.

“And it’s no problem. But I’d like to emphasise that you should refrain from using prohibited areas around the airport again,” Jeno firmly states, not exactly a warning but more like a friendly reminder.

“I won’t trouble you anymore, Sir—“  Jaemin presses his lips and nods remorsefully. “I mean, Jeno.” Jeno, who’s been watching him with interest, finally breaks into a small chuckle.

“Alright. See ya.”

As Jeno struts down the scenic landscape, he has a few precious minutes to himself that he spends time thinking.

A pause.

Huh. Today’s routine has gone totally disarray and it’s not even past lunch yet.

He gets a second call for the day. The screen flashes the name ‘Mark’ in bold letters.

“Dude, where are you? Dejun’s already come back and you’re nowhere to be seen.”

“I’m heading back now, okay? Something came up earlier,” Jeno flatly says.

“Something came up?! Why didn’t you alert me?”  

“It’s only a trivial matter,” Jeno confesses before ending the call.

He turns around. Jaemin is still there, except he’s now greeting a few foreigners with a kid eagerly pointing at one of the teddy bears on the racks. The next thing Jaemin does is to crouch at the kid’s eye level to hand him the said teddy bear. The two of them exchange a lulling laughter. For a moment, Jeno questions himself if Jaemin’s wide smile ever dies down and he unconsciously mirrors it.

Okay, Jeno should really get going now.

His daily routine consists of being at his guard post, tending to security checks, managing the welfare of his team and much more. 

Yet he’s here now, looking back at the clumsy stranger, thinking about how he tumbles into his mundane life like a tornado. Like a wild force he never intended for. Where everything else is always followed by black and white in Jeno’s life, suddenly a new kaleidoscope is introduced. 

Jaemin has just disrupted the equation he’d been building up over years, in a span of a few minutes.

—

The next time Jeno knocks off, it’s already a little past 8:10PM. He changes into his comfortable clothes; a green parka over a plain white shirt and some frayed jeans, and bids his fellow workers farewell. He’s already exhausted and his legs are tired as if he’d just completed a marathon.

Just for some reason when he exits his office, he decides to make a quick detour out of whim to pass by a certain cart, and Jeno would like to think it’s because he has a bit of free time before collecting his dinner from the restaurant nearby. 

He checks the notification on his app and it shows there’s still 20 mins before it’s ready for collection, so his plan is set.

From afar, he spots Jaemin sitting on a chair just staring into the void, and before Jeno knew it, he’s already a few feet apart from him.

“Hey.”

“O-Oh, you!” Jaemin gets knocked out of reverie and his previous blank face is now replaced with a kittenish grin. “Knocked off work already?”

“I’m usually tasked on the morning shift,” Jeno explains briefly. “So yeah, I end around 8pm.”

Jaemin hums. “I close up my shop around 9pm… so I will normally be done in half an hour after that.”

“How’s everything so far?” Jeno opens the opportunity to engage in another small talk.

“Hmm… well,” The smile on Jaemin’s face dims a bit at that and he averts his eye contact away. “Business has been kind of slow today. I guess children nowadays prefer games on smartphones?” With that, Jaemin releases a chortle.

His voice is melancholic yet gentle. It falls pleasantly onto Jeno’s ears compared to the way his boisterous colleagues shout their way through each discussion.

Jeno observes the shelves and finally understands what Jaemin means. 

Most of the teddy bears he saw from the morning are still where they are, untouched, and despite it being a late weekend night, there’s not many customers who pass by this cart. It could be because the cart is not located at a strategic place, but either way it feels sad to hear Jaemin’s defeated tone.

Should I?

“How much… are you selling that for?”

“That…?” Jaemin manoeuvres his head to follow the trail of Jeno’s sight. “Ah, do you mean the bear wearing the colourful hanbok?”

“Yes.”

“That’s $25… But it’s one of my older works.”

“Oh. Okay. I’ll have that, do you accept card payment?” Jeno fishes out the wallet from his pocket to get ready to complete the transaction but is halted by Jaemin.

“W-Wait!” Jaemin blinks in sheer astonishment. “What? But… why?”

“What do you mean why? Is it not for sale?”

“I don’t mean you can’t purchase it. But you don’t have to. It’s just… how do I put this,” Jaemin trips over his scarce and timid words. “Out of the blue? You’re kind of my first customer after five hours.”

But why?

Good question. It strikes a nerve in Jeno. Truth to be told, he has no idea himself. Staying for a chit-chat is something that’s not part of his clock work, even more so going to such length to appease someone. Yet he feels bad to see Jaemin being so despondent after seeing him so cheerful to start the day a few hours ago.

Jeno just can’t explain this phenomenon that’s happening internally, but he does feel undefined by the change.

“Uh… It’s for my little sister. My sister is a huge fan of dolls and stuffed toys so…” Even such a statement is unbelievable to Jeno, but he manages to carry on. “So I thought of surprising her with this.”

“How sweet of you!” Any form of doubt previously has shifted to a look of pure affection and reverence. “She must be so cute!”

Jaemin seems happy, and Jeno can’t bear to break his bubble.

With swift hands, Jaemin carefully picks up the said bear to safely wrap it in a bag. 

“While you’re here, let me give you extra doll clothes too! They’re out of season, so consider these on the house!” Jaemin puts small packets of fabric one after another into the bag.

“Thanks…”

After Jaemin secures the paper bag with a dainty lilac ribbon, he hands it over to Jeno.

“Thank you for your purchase!” Jaemin cheers in excitement. “Please let me know what your little sister thinks of them!”

“I will.”

The ride to his own apartment takes about an hour. Jeno has the paper bag strapped to the passenger seat throughout the journey and when he finally makes it back home, he slumps straight into bed.

Jaemin makes him feel unsettled.

The constant events of today that transpired had been so… weird. Not only did Jeno do things that he normally wouldn’t do, but now he resorts to lying?

Jeno lied. He didn’t have any little sister or siblings at all, but at least now he would have an excuse to keep coming back to this little shop.

—

They meet again on a clear Wednesday morning. This time, the shop owner is wearing cute rabbit pins on his hair. 

Jeno figures Jaemin has a jewelry box of tiny animal hair pins where he stores and takes out a different one each day to wear it.

“Jeno! Hello!” Jaemin is the one to call him out first. “Haven’t seen you for a while.”

“I was relocated to cover up for someone sick, but I’m back here,” Somehow, when Jeno discovers that Jaemin had been searching for him, it makes his heart dance a little. “Well… I see you have new products today.”

“I come up with new items every week!” 

“What’s this week special then?

“Fairy theme!” Jaemin’s voice rises an octave higher and Jeno can’t help the small laughter that escapes his mouth. He grabs one of the toys from his big baggage to flaunt it to Jeno. “Look, I gave them little shiny wings too. Think your sister would like these?”

“I don’t know,” Jeno chuckles again. “I’m not her. Are you trying to coax me into buying them?”

“Well, if you do…” Jaemin resembles that of a deer caught in headlights. “I can give you a friend discount!”

Jeno gazes at him with an easy smile. “There’s no need to. Please pack that up for me.”

“Hey, I was kidding you know,” Jaemin panics at that, trying to redeem himself. “Like you don’t have to buy my products every time!”

“My… sister really liked the previous one I got her. She’ll be even more happy to see a teddy bear with wings just like one of her princess dolls.”

Such a tall story, Jeno.

“What a nice brother you are, Jeno. You must be really fond of her! I’m so jealous… I’ve always been a single child so I never knew how it feels like being doted on by an older sibling,” Jaemin pouts as he straightens the teddy bear’s shiny pink wings and fixes her lace dress, before slotting it into the same paper bag again.

“I’m sure you can find someone else who’s not a sibling who will dote on you as much…”

“You think so?” Jaemin’s gleeful eyes sparkle like he’s hopeful, then breaking into a grin. “Who knows how long that will take.”

“Maybe not too long,” Jeno shrugs. “I gotta go now. Work’s starting soon.”

“Okay! Bye bye!”

And afterwards, it’s becoming Jeno’s newly added routine to visit Jaemin at his shop almost everyday.

—

This is crazy.

First, Jeno left the house way earlier to make sure he manages to cross paths with a certain someone to greet him. 

And now when he’s free from work, he’s still loitering around the airport because that certain someone hasn’t finished yet.

All this trouble just so Jeno can end up waiting for Jaemin to knock off so that they can coincidentally leave together.

Jeno notices that Jaemin’s shop is doing fairly well nowadays and he has crowds at intervals and not just an empty house like before, so he feels somewhat relieved. Certainly, his efforts to promote Jaemin’s shop to his colleagues and relatives had paid off.

“Huh? You’re still here?!” Jaemin can’t mask his surprise when he sees Jeno sauntering nearby.

“Busy day, I just ended too…”

“Oh no. It must have been really busy cos it’s over an hour late for you.”

“It’s not completely new to me, so don’t worry.”

“Hmm… yeah, I guess I can get it. The airport’s always bustling with travellers, things can happen,” Jaemin murmurs to himself. Then he busies himself with keeping his products back into his luggages and locking all the compartments of the cart.

Once Jaemin has cleared up the cart, he expects Jeno to leave but the latter’s still rooted there. 

“How do you usually get home?” Jaemin wonders aloud.

“I drive,” Jeno nonchalantly says, like it’s not a big deal. 

“So cool!” To Jaemin who exclaims, it is. “I should’ve taken my driving licence while I was still studying for my major.”

“It’s never too late to start—”

“No!” Jaemin vehemently protests, making an ‘X’ sign with his arms. “I probably won’t pass the tests so easily so I’m not gonna set myself up for multiple heartbreaks.”

“They’re not that hard, Jaemin.”

“Pfft, coming from someone who already owns a licence!”

“I’m being honest,” Jeno chuckles softly, watching him frown. “Are you mad?”

“Not telling,” Jaemin coyly refutes. He loads the large bags onto the trolley again and just as he’s about to push them, Jeno grabs the handle next to his hands.

“W-What are you doing?” Jaemin asks curiously.

“Are you famished?“

“Kinda…”

“I figured. Let’s go, we can have supper before heading home.” 

—

So they end up hitching a ride in Jeno’s car to a nearby flea market, where the streets are lined up with orange food tents. Despite it being almost midnight, most of the stalls were filled with people and the whole scene portrayed a very lively atmosphere containing different walks of life.

They stroll side by side into the flea market as they enter one of the food tents, where the lady owner shouts a friendly ‘Welcome!’.

“Hello,” Jaemin reciprocates with a gentlemanly smile, while Jeno nods in acknowledgment.

They find an empty seat at the right extreme corner just as the previous couple clears their table. Jaemin leads the way first and because the space is so narrow, another customer ends up bumping into him.

Jaemin wobbles a bit but then he feels a hand clutch around his waist, cushioning him from a possible fall and his back meets a very broad chest. 

“Be careful,” Jeno reminds him in a low timbre voice, forcing Jaemin to tilt his head as their eyes meet. The light scowl on his face diminishes. “You fell when I first met you too.”

“I didn’t fall, I was bending over to pick my items up…” And it’s clear Jaemin is caught off-guard as he detaches himself off Jeno.

“Just please watch your steps carefully next time.”

”Okay…”

They finally settle down at their little private table corner and scan through the menu although both seem to have decided on what to eat.

“I haven’t been to a street market in so long,” Jaemin comments as he immerses in the nocturnal night. “This really brings back memories.”

“You sure? I was worried you had somewhere else in mind.”

Jeno takes a seat opposite Jaemin as he shakes his head.

“No, this is perfect actually. The food here is great and they’re all affordable.”

The two of them order a bowl of cold noodles, some spicy side dishes, and a glass of soju to share. 

“Let’s toast!” Jaemin grins so hard until his eyes curve like crescents and clinks their glasses together, downing the liquid in one shot. The bitter taste makes Jaemin hiss like an old man. 

Nothing like drinking after a long day at work. Except of course Jeno has to remember he’s driving, so he makes a mental note to only drink one glass responsibly.

“How long have you been working as a guard?” 

The night still seems early, and the rest of the shallow chatters drown away as Jaemin and Jeno sink into their own world. Jeno’s chopsticks halts midway in the air, seemingly thinking.

“About… 3 years? I guess. I didn’t really have a career planned out so my cousin introduced me to this industry. Since then, I’ve stayed here for a while. Kinda enjoy it after some time. I think what comes with the job has also somewhat disciplined me to follow a kind of strict schedule.”

“Schedule?” Jaemin asks in a probing tone.

“Like… eating, showering, resting on time. Like in school? I have a sort of designated regime that I’ve been doing for years… it’s kind of a bad habit for me. If I don’t follow the timeline for a day, it makes me feel strange… like a sinner, even,” Jeno adds, feeling intruded by the way Jaemin observes him like a rare specimen.

“Hmm. There’s no right or wrong in having a schedule. It keeps you grounded. Kind of like a daily planner right?”

“Yeah.”

“I see. That’s fine! But what’s not fine is being harsh on yourself when something is out of your control… Life didn’t come with a manual guide, so it’s to be expected when it doesn’t follow your plan all the time! Loosen up a bit, it wouldn’t hurt you. If you’re too uptight, then it will break you. You know, like how metal chains can break in the winter cold because they get too taut?” Jaemin lays down every word for word. “They need to be able to have some allowance. Same goes with you.”

“A total science geek, aren’t you?” Jeno sounds endeared by the end of his speech, which he refuses to hide it.

“It’s a fact! But sometimes, there’s always that thrill of breaking the rules, don’t you agree?

Jaemin waits for a favourable answer and sends a charming smirk to encourage him, to which Jeno slumps his shoulder in defeat.

“And how about you? How long have you been doing this?”

They start shedding chapters of their life, both coming from completely different backgrounds but somehow, here they are at the same spot.

“Well… I actually picked these skills ages ago and started this as a side job while I was still studying, so you could say about 7 years?”

“That’s pretty admirable,” Jeno puts some spicy vegetables into his mouth. “You’re good at it.”

“Really?” Jaemin’s eyes glimmer at the compliment.

“Yeah, really.”

“My Mum thinks I’m wasting time and would always ask me to find a real job… I don't know what she means by ‘real’, but I genuinely enjoy doing this.”

A fork in his hand, Jaemin pokes at his dumplings as he states the obvious. Jeno notices this, and the way his haunting voice trembles a bit.

“That’s not true. If you like doing what you’re good at, then it’s valuable and I don’t see why you shouldn’t continue it.” 

And Jeno doesn’t think he can find someone who would smile appreciatively like Jaemin, a pretty smile that graces his face when talking about his passion.

“You understand me right, Jeno?” Jaemin asks. “It makes me happy when I hand those little children the toys they like. I mean, of course I have adults getting them as gifts too and they’re mostly for happy occasions so I feel like I’ve achieved something. It’s adorable and inexpensive, yet the amount of joy they receive is priceless. So… I don’t think I would want to work at other places.“

“Have you ever thought of becoming a teacher then?”

“Sometimes I do… but I realise I’m better with my hands after all.”

Jeno recalls the eight new stuffed bears he has at home, all ranging from different collections he bought from Jaemin under the guise of his little sister, and they’re almost taking up his whole mattress. 

He doesn’t mind keeping them, they’re all made well. And now he knows why.

It’s ironic how Jaemin sells these toys because he wants to see the children’s innocent smiles, yet Jeno has been giving his silent support because he wishes to make Jaemin smile too in this way.

“Yeah, I totally get you,” Jeno agrees wholeheartedly. “There’s no problem with following your dreams, like you said earlier. Your own words.”

“Yay! You’re the best! That’s everything I needed to hear,” Jaemin lightens up and cheers. Jeno doesn’t say more than needed, but his consolation proves to be more than enough for Jaemin. 

Jaemin's glassy eyes are lukewarm when they scan Jeno’s face a second too long, and the latter falters. 

“Hmm?” Jeno accidentally blurts out from being the recipient of Jaemin’s unwavering gaze.

“You’re so silly, look, there’s a rice grain stuck on your lips!”

Without hesitating, Jaemin’s arm moves faster than Jeno’s heart can react, and he’s already thumbing the plush skin near Jeno’s lips. Jeno gets stunned out of his wits at the skin contact, and the feeling of Jaemin stroking his bottom lip has his system in clear overdrive.

“Are you keeping this for breakfast later?” Jaemin giggles when he sees Jeno round his eyes.

Jeno stares hard at him, experiencing all sorts of emotions for the first time in a long while inside his throbbing chest. Feelings that have never surfaced in his systematic life, and now he reckons there’ll be more instances like this. Jeno thinks he’s sick because his malfunctioning heart is about to jump out of his poor ribcage. 

It’s like Jaemin just knows how to get him unprepared every single time, but yet so far, not once was that kind of doubtful apprehension… ever unwelcomed.

To solidify this simply, Jaemin’s one careless action has made Jeno most certain of his blooming feelings throughout the weeks.

Of what he’s been feeling deep inside.

“Na Jaemin, you…”

Jaemin bats his lashes coquettishly, but the kind smile still remains. “Yes?”

Jeno sighs. “It’s nothing.”

“You know, um I was clearing my drawers yesterday and found three free tickets to the aquarium…” Jaemin suddenly suggests as he stuffs the last fried dumpling into his mouth, chomping on it until his chubby cheeks bloat out. “Why don’t we go with your sister? Does she like animals? Does she like dolphins?”

“My sister?” Jeno gawks, trying to regain his composure.

“Your sister,” Jaemin replays his question like a mime.

“Um…” Jeno’s now entangled in his own web of lies. He can’t even excuse himself or brush the topic off. The fear of losing everything built on a mirage that isn’t even his tugs on his heartstrings so dearly, yet he can’t bear to break this façade. 

At the same time, he thinks that it’s not like he can create a miracle out of this, so he grimaces and decides to go with one final lie. Anything after this… will be up to him to decide. “My sister’s in the countryside till next week so she won’t be here… Sorry.”

Jeno wonders whether Jaemin would be able to accept his apology the moment he comes clean about everything. It’s not exactly a grave mistake per se, but Jeno is painfully aware that everyone hates liars. Even if he’s being selfish, he wants to pretend just a bit more, to remain closer to Jaemin. 

“Aww…” Jaemin pouts as if disappointed, and Jeno feels so guilty for juxtaposing such an expression when he hears what Jaemin says next. “How about we two go by ourselves then?”

“Just—“ Jeno’s throat goes parched. “The two of us?”

“The tickets are gonna expire soon, like at the end of this week, Sunday, and using two out of three of them is better than nothing… Jaemin quickly adds. “It feels weird if I go to leisure places alone… but of course if you don’t want to I—“

“Let’s go then,” Jeno cuts him off with a soft smile. “To the aquarium.”

Jeno might have overthink it, but he seems to note Jaemin’s cheeks being dusted in pink. He thinks it must be the alcohol getting to him.

“That sounds… really nice,” Jaemin agrees in a tender voice, igniting a mild grin on his face as he lowers his gaze back to his unfinished food.

Jeno does the same.

It’s funny how after they finish their hearty supper and head back to Jeno’s car, Jaemin straightaway falls into a slumber. Jeno had tried to wake him up twice and thrice, but the former was sound asleep.

So instead, Jeno puts on some songs that serenade the convertible with a soothing melody as he drives into the woeful dusk of the night with his sleeping companion. He’s just thankful that Jaemin had been sober enough to provide him with his home address before being completely passed out.

When they finally arrive at his neighbourhood, Jeno peers out his windows to check the vicinity, hoping he got the right location.

There’s a lovely garden that adorns the front of the tall building, and it’s somewhat comforting to look at as the flora and fauna help make the place look less lonely.

“Hey… Jaemin. I think we’re already here?”

When Jeno receives no response, he finally realises Jaemin is still fast asleep and scoffs disbelievingly. For some reason, the view casts a calming effect and Jeno figures it’s alright to let him catch some eyeshut for a few more minutes before turning off his car engine.

The monumental silence that seeps in urges Jeno to turn and look at Jaemin once more.

In this state, Jaemin really embodies such serene innocence. There’s grace and beauty painted all over his face. His cheekbones are feathered in hues of crimson so Jeno concludes he must not really be a great drinker. Jeno has to greatly applaud his effort though, for trying to finish most of it since he didn’t want their money’s worth to go to waste.

Jaemin’s rosy lips become parted slightly and the curious thought of whether they feel as soft as they look crosses Jeno’s hazy mind. It’s not everyday he gets to look at such a gorgeous boy like this up-close, so he appreciates the view very much.

He notices Jaemin has impossibly long and straight eyelashes which he never knew until tonight, and realises a strand has dropped near his nose bridge.

Carefully, Jeno attempts to remove it without waking Jaemin up, but the lash is too fine and thin so he misses it on his first try. He’s also careful not to scratch Jaemin's ivory skin with his fingernail, but has to move closer to do so.

Jeno finally manages to peel the strayed lash away from Jaemin’s face with utter concentration but just as he’s about to retract his hand, Jaemin’s eyelids slowly flutter open.

It takes Jaemin a few moments to adjust himself to the surrounding light, but upon seeing Jeno’s face in that proximity, the younger blinks his eyes wide open and his breath hitches in his seat.

Of course, seeing Jaemin taken aback makes Jeno realise the suggestive position and the turmoil the former is in.

“Y-Yes…?” Jaemin mumbles shyly.

Both are too stunned to move; Jeno is too busy drinking in Jaemin’s visuals while Jaemin is too busy trying to unclog his words. So ultimately, the first person to move away is the person to have caused this. 

“Sorry, there was an eyelash stuck on your face. I was trying to remove it,” Jeno clenches his jaw.

“O-Oh, is it?” Jaemin quickly brings a hand to caress his own cheeks, aghast. “Is it still there?”

“It’s gone now,” Jeno says as he dusts off his palms.

“T-Thank you.”

Jeno clears his throat. “Don’t mention it…”

Jaemin then exits the car before the dreaded silence can stretch further. He walks around to unload his large bags from the car boot. Jeno follows from behind.

“Do you need help?”

“I’m fine, I can manage. Besides, I think you should get going now, it’s really late…”

“Okay,” Jeno promises him tentatively. “Then you head up first. I’ll leave once you’ve reached your apartment.”

Jaemin nods and teeters unsteadily into his apartment building, leaving a fair distance between them. Jeno worries if Jaemin can really make it back to his unit safely in one piece.

But then he stops dead in his tracks before glancing back at Jeno, who’s currently leaning against his car.

“I really enjoyed today’s supper. Thank you, Jeno.”

“I enjoyed your company too, Jaemin.”

Jaemin blushes and his smile illuminates like the garden in this dark neighbourhood. “Let’s do that again, some other day?”

“Of course, I’m always looking forward to it.”

Jaemin sheepishly looks at his fiddling sneakers and nods giddily, before a farewell is bade.

Maybe Jeno had been wrong.

All this while, Jeno has firmly believed that going out of a planned routine would be anything but sweet.

He confined himself to watching the world in a monochromatic order, didn’t challenge what he thought should be the norm, and never left room for any exceptions.

So when a wildcard like Jaemin comes in to intervene the order in his life, Jeno was unsettled at first. It just so happens that Jaemin is a good, kind, lovely and handsome person altogether; an enigma in all senses.

But now he knows these unsettled feelings come from himself, secretly indulging in a vast world he was unwilling to explore at first.

The human body is capable of feeling thousands of things emotionally and physically all at once. Jeno realises that he’s been limiting himself from these guilty pleasures for no reason. Most of the precious things in life are afterall felt through the beating organ, and not through some calculations or words.

It’s harder to even go back to how he lived before when Jeno has found love that actually came in the form of someone like Jaemin, someone he can naturally gravitate towards.

And as long as his eyes aren’t closed, these tender feelings will always remain to keep him warm, afloat and alive. Life doesn’t come with a manual guide as quoted by someone dear, so now Jeno is going to live a little more recklessly to seize the best out of it.

—

“I am telling you, he’s changed! He has all these tiny… teddy bears lined up on his desk and after lunch break, he comes back with another huge bag of stuffed toys too!”

“Jeno? That big intimidating person? Nah, you’re joking.”

“Mark, I swear I will punch you. This is a severe situation.”

“You’re not imagining it, right?” Mark chuckles but it has connotations of pure horror. “You think he secretly has a child?”

“I don’t know! But it’s driving me up the wall because he buys too much, and then he gets me to bring some home! I don’t even have any use for them!”

“Gossiping behind my back?”

Mark and Renjun cease their banter on the spot when Jeno enters the pantry with an unbothered face (as usual), who goes to the coffee machine to brew a hot mocha for himself.

“J-Jeno!” Mark snickers nervously. “You’re on break too right now?”

"Yeah. Does that disappoint you?”

“That’s not what Mark meant, sheesh! We were joking around!” Renjun chips in albeit more casually, and the three of them sit around the small round table. 

Renjun and Mark exchange a few suspicious glances, with the former occasionally nudging Mark as if to start the ball rolling. Jeno is about to ignore the blatant happenings while eating his cookie but obviously, his two colleagues aren’t exactly the most subtle people.

Jeno sets his mug down to rub his temple. “Do any of you happen to have anything to say to me?”

Renjun then leans closer and he’s almost in Jeno’s personal space which makes the latter frown.

“Is there something going on with you…?”

“Like what?”

“I mean, are you unwell?”

“Renjun!” Mark yells. “What did I tell you about hurting other people?”

“What?” Jeno asks dumbfoundedly.

“Kidding,” Renjun withdraws and sips on his own latte, eyeing Jeno incredulously. “You’ve been buying an awful lot of… toys.”

“No judgement, of course!” Mark is quick to interrupt, a measly attempt at salvaging their friendship. “I mean if that’s your hobby then—“

“I know,” Jeno sighs. “But I can’t help it—”

“Can’t help what?“ Renjun clarifies.

“Can’t stop myself from visiting him…” Jeno props his elbows on the table to knead his face wearily in his large palms.

“Visit… him? Him? What do you mean?” Mark cautiously retaliates before his jaw drops in finality. “Oh my God, have you perhaps fallen for someone?”

“Idiot, I think he has!” Renjun smacks Mark’s back with a thud. “Look at his face! I’ve never seen it as red as a tomato!”

“Enough, that’s all I’m gonna reveal.”

“No! Come back here!” Both Renjun and Mark latch onto each of Jeno’s arms to prevent the man from escaping the confrontation. “Sit down! You have some explaining to do!”

Jeno groans seeing their two expectant faces.

“Do they work here too?”

Jeno nods, and their grins grow annoyingly wider.

“Office romance?”

“He’s not from our team… I mean, he works as a store seller in this airport too.”

Renjun smacks Mark on the back again which earns a loud yelp this time. “See? See! I told you that’s where all those unknown teddy bears are coming from!”

“About that—“

Renjun lets out a wistful breath. “Look, I can see you’re trying to appeal to your lover boy, and wow, I’m low-key touched actually, but you have to stop dumping those stuffed toys on me when you don’t want them. Seriously, I feel bad for taking them for free too.”

"It’s not that I don’t want them!” Jeno defends himself almost immediately. “I like them a lot! It’s just that my house doesn’t have much space to store the rest anymore… so I don’t know what to do now. Or where to keep them.”

“So how many did you actually buy…” Renjun tries.

Jeno holds up four fingers.

“Four?”

“Forty—” When there’s ambiguity and hesitation written all over Jeno’s face, Renjun puts his hand up instead.

“Never mind, don’t answer that.”

“Oh Jeno,” Mark chuckles in amusement. “Wasn’t aware you had this flirty side in you, dude! If you can’t buy his goods anymore, just tell him! It’s not like he’ll stop seeing you for it.”

“Are you sure?”

“Jeno,” Mark deadpans as he dishevels his hair. “I know your bond isn’t just worth like 20 stuffed toys. That’s something more important than material value and money.”

Hearing Mark and Renjun put their feedback out bluntly like that indeed makes Jeno sound kind of like a fool now.

“You’re right, maybe I’ll talk to him soon.”

Mark and Renjun gasp dramatically. “Woah… He can laugh too.”

Sometimes, Jeno forgets just how insufferable his colleagues can be.

—

The day for their aquarium visit arrives sooner than Jeno can prepare for.

He may not show it, but he’s as nervous as a trainwreck inside. They agreed to meet after lunchtime at the entrance of the sea aquarium, and because it’s a date Jeno has been looking forward to, he unknowingly arrives an hour earlier. 

Jeno didn’t get to style his hair today, so the flat brown hair makes him look as young as he was in high school. He also makes sure he picks out his best clothes, and that consists of a simple denim jacket over a black turtleneck. The weather has been pretty chilly since it’s the monsoon season and inside the aquarium, the temperature is about to dip further.

Jeno hopes Jaemin is wearing warm clothes too.

Taking this opportunity to explore the timetable displayed outside the ticket booth, Jeno realises there’s a fountain show at 6pm. He makes another mental note to ensure that they both catch the big event on time.

“Jeno! Hello!”

Taking his attention off the poster, Jeno turns around to spot Jaemin beckoning him from miles apart. His frame looks tinier from this angle, and they share just a few seconds of nothingness, grazing at each other.

Jaemin looks unbelievably attractive today.

Jeno fears that with how much fondness he’s looking at the other person, it might expose his vulnerable feelings. He’s been wearing his heart on sleeve far too often now. Not that he was planning to conceal it any further after today.

In the radiant sunshine, bright but cooling, Jaemin is seen wearing a thin beige trenchcoat over a striped pullover. He has a little cat pin clipped to his hair today. The yellow rays frame him delicately, his smile glows, and Jeno’s heart seizes with desire.

Running with the wind, Jaemin’s hair flows and bounces with every step like an excited child, their distance closes in and gets smaller… smaller… and smaller… yet with each impending proximity, Jeno feels his heart grow wider to envelop all the love that he’s been containing.

Until Jaemin is finally within his arm’s reach, looking a lot like love itself.

“Did I make you wait long?” Jaemin pants irregularly. Even in this tired state, Jeno thinks he looks breathtaking. “I got here as fast as I could!”

“You didn’t have to run, we have all the time,” Jeno chuckles like he means it and helps to fix the few strands of fringe that have fallen on Jaemin’s eyelids.

“Hmm, something's different,” Jaemin tilts his head lightly and squints his eyes dubiously. “You let your hair down today.”

“Oh, y-yeah… I felt like going casual today,” Jeno blinks fast as he bashfully admits.

“I think it suits you a lot, Jeno,” Jaemin lightly smiles and says nothing else. He then clasps onto Jeno’s wrist and drags them to the entrance, never once letting go until they hand over the two complimentary tickets. 

Passing by the gold rotating doors is another sight to behold. From the floor to the ceiling, there are conceptualised with images of marine animal drawings. The centre aisle is decorated with fluorescent blue lights that lead them to a tunnel where the real adventure unlocks.

It feels like a simple date, but Jeno has no complaints about it. In fact, it feels romantic to be strolling like this without a plan in mind, just exploring the beautiful scenery at whim.

“It feels like we’re underwater right, Jeno?” Jaemin comments dreamily as his eyes rake all around the place surrounded by water, mesmerised by the sea creatures swimming over their heads. “There’s so many of them.”

The tunnel is a long stretch of a passageway, where they’re underneath a transparent acrylic dome. They can see everything when they look up. Above them is all clear and crystal water that houses diverse aquatic habitats. 

Jeno can’t disagree. He’s just as in awe as he watches a hammerhead shark glide through the ripple waves followed by a school of orange fishes. It reminds him of his favourite childhood movie.

“Look Jaemin, a jellyfish.”

“Huh? Jellyfish?! Where—“ 

Jaemin’s cheek gets poked by Jeno’s finger when he turns to his left, the effect proding a hole in his soft skin that resembles a dimple.

“Jeno! You liar!”

Yeah, I’m a liar for you.

“Now you look like a pufferfish,” Jeno smirks in a mischevous manner and avoids the incoming jab from Jaemin skillfully.

He ends up getting chased down the path by an indignant Jaemin and when he’s caught and punished with tickles, the two of them joyfully laugh it off without a care for the world; a world created where they are content with only each other’s presence.

—

The day withers away fast like sand in an hourglass when you’re having fun with the person you cherish the most.

Jaemin was impressive, to say the least.

He’d managed to list down most of the aquatic animals’ names, their origins, and it seemed that he significantly enjoyed this whole tour. He chattered so much that all of Jeno’s fatigue inevitably got washed away. It was like Jeno sitting through endless lectures, except he never would dread this one.

Occasionally, their hands would lightly brush while they explored the vast aquarium, sometimes Jeno would pull away first, sometimes Jaemin, but after a while, neither of them moved away and let it be.

The aquarium is pretty crowded on the weekends, swarmed with families and their little children. They've seen huge cute mascots scattered at every corner, delighting eager children. Some of them were sculpting balloons, and Jaemin actually got a poodle design for Jeno. The latter denied it at first out of embarrassment, but somehow managed to get convinced.

Now, he's kind of attracting little kids who are eyeing his big balloon in fascination.

They’ve seen couples holding hands too, and Jeno fidgets not knowing what he should do with his own. It feels like a direct call out to him. Somehow, it seems like Jaemin must be sharing the same sentiment, because he would awkwardly cast a glance at Jeno and giggle. 

There are so many unique booths at the aquarium that spoil the pair for choices, but they decide to take a break at one of the seats near a big display of stingrays since they’ve been walking for hours. 

Jaemin gulps down some plain water. Jeno checks his wristwatch and realises there’s 30 minutes left to the fountain show, which he wants to surprise Jaemin with.

“What do you think of today?” Jeno asks as he leans his back against the seat.

“It was amazing. The weather was so nice too. I got to see all sorts of animals and got to try new snacks! I felt like a kid again. Everything worked out really well in our favour, thankfully,” Jaemin chortles in satisfaction.

Jaemin’s smile is so pure that it causes a pricking twinge somewhere in Jeno’s lobe of chest. He knows that if he wants to advance things with Jaemin, he has to be honest and come clean about everything. Starting something on a wrong foot would only snowball into something gravely… and by then it would be too late to make amendments.

“Then… what do you think of me?”

Jeno takes a deep breath as he leans over and sees the expression on Jaemin shift into a thousand wordless things.

“About y-you…?”

“Yeah… Because the truth is…” Jeno’s face drifts into a solemn glow. "I... think I’ve caught feelings for you. And I want to know how you feel about me…”

Jaemin stares at him for a number of beats, his eyes dark and glassy like he wants to say something more.

“I don’t think I can come to visit you at your shop anymore, Jaemin…” Jeno confesses, his voice slightly shuddering like he’s trying to fight it. 

“Why not?”

“I tend to get greedier every time I come to see you. Honestly, I… don’t have a little sister. I just said that so I could keep buying those teddy bears just to come and see you. It’s not the toys that I want, but you… Those toys are in fact, lying in my bed with nowhere else to go,” Jeno chuckles painfully. “It’s silly and ridiculous, I know, but I was afraid that was the only excuse I could use to get closer to you… In that short time we had, it made me really happy.”

Jeno sees that the decision he made has crushed the boy before him in one way or more. “I’m really sorry I lied about a lot of things. So I understand if you’re mad at me.”

Jeno's chest is throbbing equally rough, and it infects his whole body in a trail of pounding confusion. When Jaemin doesn’t return anything, Jeno becomes at a loss for words. He’s about to think everything is finally over when the younger finally speaks up. 

“Jeno, you…” Jaemin’s speech is caught in his throat and his pupils are dilated with a shiny sheen. He sees everything on Jaemin’s face fall apart, like there’s no one left to pick up the pieces. 

But then, Jaemin leaps off his seat to practically throw himself at Jeno. Jeno jolts from the direct crash, but his hands quickly steady them and find purchase on the familiar lithe waist. 

“Were you so worried about that? Here I was, being afraid it was something serious!” Jaemin grumbles into Jeno’s ear, not even realising it causes goosebump to rise underneath Jeno’s skin.

“Um, well, I mean, lying is bad, right…?”

Jaemin tightens his arms around Jeno’s neck and sighs. “Yes, yes it is, a white lie is still a lie, but your reasoning behind it is too adorable for me not to forgive you.”

Jeno gapes. “Really?”

Jaemin pulls away just a bit and woah, the distance is even intimate than when they were trapped in the car previously. Still, neither of them broke eye contact, basking in the rare moment.

“Jeno, life must have been very harsh to you. It’s something that… Neither me or you should be harping on for too long. And you told me the truth, so that’s more than enough.” 

“You’ve taught me a lot of things. I’ve learnt how to laugh, live, and also love thanks to you. I used to picture everything very grimly and differently until you showed me there was more than one way to go about everyday. I have never felt this way before, but you made it so easy… Which is why, I think it was fate that we met back then.” 

Jaemin breaths and lifts a soft smile. “And what if I told you those things precisely because I feel the same about you?”

Jeno’s pulse quickens and his whole body freezes. His eyes scan Jaemin’s gentler ones to seek redemption, and the younger senses this which causes him to break into a laugh.

“Is it that hard to believe?”

“No!” Jeno refutes fast. “I mean, I’m glad you actually feel that way about me too…”

They’re both awkward, but they’re learning and will get there.

“Yes silly, you’re not very smart in the matters-of-the-heart field, huh?” Jaemin teases.

Jeno then recalls something.

He checks his wrist watch again and panics when he discovers there’s 5 more minutes left before the opening of the grand fountain show. This would be the highlight of their day so without further ado, he extends his arm to tug Jaemin along with him where they both sprint tirelessly to their final destination. 

—

They barely make it to the fountain show. A full house, but Jeno manages to squeeze through other spectators to attain them a fairly desirable spot. They get a clear view of the fountain space and wait in anticipation.

“What’s about to happen here?” Jaemin whispers hushedly.

Jeno smiles, and with a leap of newfound courage and hope, his hand finally envelopes Jaemin’s hand properly this time. And when they do, it's a perfect fit. “You’ll see.”

The staff on standby begin their countdown and the studio gets dimmed almost pitch black. Jeno feels the grip on his hand tighten at the sudden darkness, so he gives Jaemin’s hand a gentle squeeze to assure him all is well. 

Magic starts to unveil.

The strobe lights that unfold before their eyes dance in a timely rhythm. Jaemin’s jaw goes slack as he loses himself in the symphony of colourful jets, accompanied by white mists that make the entire fountain look unreal and glitter with beauty. Everything else is vibrant and perfect, just like their day.

The grandeur of the water show is spectacular. It feels like a whimsical finale to their date, akin to putting a cherry on top of an ice-cream. Their visit here has been enthralling, and though it’s their first, Jeno certainly wishes it won’t be their last.

While the neon colours of the jet switches, Jeno peels his eyes away to focus on somewhere else. 

As much as the show is gorgeous, there’s something else that captures his breath in this moment. Something that is milder than flashy lights, something that’s quieter than fireworks, and yet manages to evoke electrifying feelings all the same.

Everything afterwards is a blur. 

“Na Jaemin.”

“Hmm?” Jaemin turns to smile at him.

“I love you.”

The magic doesn’t lie with the water fountain. It’s when Jeno draws Jaemin in slowly with hands on his hip and nape, and then Jaemin automatically lets his eyes shut.

It’s when Jeno slants his head so that his gentle lips can meet with Jaemin’s quivering ones as he plants a soft and melting kiss to his heart’s desire.

All other sounds of the world go muted. Jaemin’s hands come up to place them on Jeno’s chest as they kiss languidly, ignoring the bedazzling show before them. 

Jeno kisses him, gently at first. He lingers long, to memorise the softness and curves of Jaemin's lips for the first time against his. And then with a swift gradation of fervour, he slips his tongue in and makes Jaemin cling to him as the only solid thing in this dizzying spell. Hot breaths clash against one another. A small sigh falls out of the latter's mouth as he willingly accepts the invitation.

Their tangled figures cast a silhouette against the fountain display like a work of art that could be the envy of others, and when the water show is over, the room eventually gets lit up again.

That’s when Jeno lets Jaemin go, nibbling on his bottom lip regretfully when they separate. Jaemin’s eyes are hazy and blown out from their kiss, and his knees would’ve buckled if it wasn't for the strong arm around his waist.

“So… did you like the fountain show?” Jeno teases Jaemin who’s still in his embrace.

“Fountain? What fountain show?” Jaemin plays along, feigning ignorance. “You made me miss it.”

“Oops,” Jeno chuckles in endearment and Jaemin leans his head on the former’s shoulder as they watch the finishing touches that the show has to offer.

“Hey… Jeno. You said it was fate we met. But I’m glad that we both made the choice to stay.”

“I mean, there was no way I was going to let someone like you go in the first place. Can’t imagine my life without you now.”

“Love you too,” Jaemin beams expressively. “I’m that special, huh?”

“Very,” Jeno caresses Jaemin’s knuckles like they’re the most fragile ever. “But I’m just going to confess too… that I really like you but you know, my apartment is going to burst soon… so umm, is it okay if I don’t buy any more of those bears you make for the time being… I still really adore them though!”

"I know," Jaemin cranes up a little and his eyes round adorably like marbles, and then he’s laughing uncontrollably. “Oh, Jeno.”

Heaving a lungful of air, Jeno frowns. “What? I’m being serious here.”

“From the start, I knew you were going there for me and not for those little stuffed toys. So it wouldn’t have mattered anyway…”

“Wait, really?”

“You are so oblivious sometimes. But, what can I say?” Jaemin purses his lips into a thin smug line, winking flirtatiously to emphasise his point. “I’m quite the charmer.”

When Jaemin’s a tad distracted, Jeno leans in to steal a kiss again, this time on his cheek. It makes the younger squirm with tingle and delight, and Jeno feels like the luckiest man on earth.

—

A year has passed since they started dating, and the days that fill Jeno’s life have been nothing but blissful. He makes his days count.

They nurse each other’s voids, cheer each other up, call till late nights, and spend their birthdays and anniversary together with flowers and exchanged vows and sweet nothings.

Jeno still grabs his favourite navy blue silken necktie rolled underneath a glass compartment, his toast is still lightly baked and topped with jam and peanut. And afterwards, he still wears the brown loafer shoes that are neatly pointed towards the door. 

The only difference is that now, he has someone to share all these little habits with and he’s no longer alone.

And that sometimes on their dates, Jeno allows Jaemin to put his favourite animal pins on his hair too so that they match.

Jeno hopes that when they do decide to become parents and adopt kids in the near future, he'll also be able to put the same pins on their hair lovingly.

They’re both still working at the same place, although the only thing that has changed is Jeno waiting for Jaemin to go home together, or Jaemin reaching work early to meet him for breakfast. It feels domestic, to say the least.

“Jeno!” Renjun calls out to him, his head sticking from outside the pantry. “Jaemin is here.”

“Oh okay, let me go—”

“No, it's fine! I’ll let him enter. You just continue your lunch there.”

When Renjun disappears into the corner, another head floats up in the air that makes Jeno scoff humorously. 

“Hey, am I disturbing you?” Jaemin walks into the pantry with light steps, sitting next to Jeno.

“No, I’m almost done. What brings you here today? Usually I’m the one visiting you at the shop.”

“Returning the favour,” Jaemin leans the side of his cheek against his palm, admiring his hungry lover. “Sorry I overslept, so we couldn’t leave for work together.”

“Don’t apologise, you’re probably tired. Didn’t you say that you’re also working on another seasonal collection?”

Jaemin nods gleefully. “Mhm, the upcoming Christmas collection.” 

“I’m gonna be your first customer again then,” Jeno’s kind eyes disappear into crescents as he proudly announces it, and Jaemin can’t help feeling moved by the sincerity. “Your business is slowly expanding.”

“Yes,” Jaemin agrees shyly. “I’m also thinking of recruiting part-timers to shed off some workload.”

“Good. Cos’ I don’t want you to overexert yourself,” Jeno tells him in a worried plea.

“I won’t,” Jaemin tells him. “Your awards ceremony is in February. Have you found a suit yet?”

“Not really, but I’ll probably find an old one in my closet later,” Jeno says as he puts a mouthful of fried rice into his mouth. “You’re coming, right?”

“Of course. I wouldn’t miss my baby receiving his first Excellence Award for the world.”

“Thanks, Jaem,” Jeno then presses a kiss to the tip of his nose.

“Oh,” Jaemin jolts up suddenly. “Do swing by my place tonight.”

“Alright. What’s the occasion though?”

Jaemin exudes a meaningful grin. “You’ll find out soon.”

—

In the end, Jeno receives a text from Jaemin that said he’d close up his store earlier today so Jeno should just meet him at home straight. Jeno had wondered why the younger would knock off first, but didn’t really contemplate it much since his goal of coming back home to Jaemin would still be fulfilled.

On the way to Jaemin’s apartment, Jeno decides to stop by the nearby bakery and buys a couple of their favourite buns and desserts. Jaemin especially likes their lemon meringue tart with fresh whipped cream for his sweet tooth.

When the door to his apartment clicks open, Jeno’s heart swells a bit. It’s a view he could get used to— Jaemin looks so huggable in his comfy pink pyjamas, so dressed down that it makes him look utterly innocent.

“Come in!” Jaemin doesn’t even wait for Jeno to toe off his shoes properly and yanks him inside his humble abode and makes him sit on a wooden stool near his usual working table.

“Um, Jaem, I got you some tarts—” Jeno drawls out in a hurry and Jaemin finally halts a minuscule, looking at the transparent bag of goodies next to him. 

“Oh, how lovely,” Jaemin rewards Jeno with a forehead peck. “Thank you, but I’ll save them later.”

“What are you doing…?” Jeno quips as he watches Jaemin brisk around his studio, pulling open stacked drawers as if searching for something. He then loops a measuring tape around his nape, and hauls out a nude dressmaker mannequin from his own room that Jeno has never seen before. Did he recently order that?

“Jaemin—” Jeno finally stands up, unable to withstand the commotion, and catches on his wrist. “Baby, what are you doing exactly?”

Jaemin’s stupefied eyes pass his, and then his other hand touches Jeno. 

“I want to make a suit for you… What do you think?”

And if Jeno wasn’t irrevocably in love with him before, he would be now. 

“A suit?” Jeno asks, albeit confused. “For me? Why?”

“Yes, for you,” Jaemin peers up to him with clear eyes. “I’ve been thinking. Soon, you’ll be receiving such an important award, you should look your best. So I decided to make you something personally-tailored so you can wear it on that special day… I want it to be memorable for you.”

“I’d appreciate that… but isn’t it gonna be challenging for you? You’ve never done this before, right?”

“Umm…” Jaemin ducks his head sheepishly. “I mean, I have made plenty of mini clothes before… just not life-sized ones. But I’ve been practising very diligently!”

“Is that why you’ve been so sleepy every morning?” Jeno chortles in a devoted tune.

“Hey, don’t make fun of me!” Jaemin scrunches his nose angrily that never fails to make Jeno coo.

“My bad,” The guilty man apologises after incurring his wrath. 

“C’mere babe,” Jaemin hums out as he disentangles the measuring tape from his neck. “Let me take your measurements first.”

Jeno stays still as requested. He straightens his body so that Jaemin can run the measuring tape flat against the front of his chest.

There's that instant bang in his chest. Jeno had initially expected them to just have dinner, watch a movie and then call it a day. His heart is racing but he tries not to let it show.

Jaemin is concentrating as his pupils narrow, mumbling to himself certain numbers as he measures the inches between Jeno’s shoulders and pit to pit. 

Unashamedly, Jeno continues to stare down at Jaemin with full flickering eyes. His gaze speaks a lot of things that represent his admiration, adoration and fondness all at once. They’re standing at such a close proximity that Jeno is completely sure Jaemin can count his erratic heart rate per minute with just his mere fingertips.

“H-Hey…” Jaemin stutters, albeit his eyes are still fixated on the yellow measuring tape between them.

“Hmm?”

“Stop staring at me like that… otherwise, I’m unable to work.”

“Why? Do I make you nervous?”

“Yeah… very,” Jaemin looks up, all frozen to his handsome face. “Having your full attention makes me weak.”

Jeno simply stares down at Jaemin's face with an unreadable expression in his darkened eyes.

Watching Jaemin take a step closer to measure his sleeves, Jeno then breathes a wicked smirk. And all of a sudden, it has Jaemin letting out a tiny gasp when the latter feels an arm luring him in by the waist. 

Jaemin ends up trapped, placing timid hands on Jeno's shoulders. The poor measuring tape falls to the floor but no one even cares. If ever one of them moves, their lips would be grazing and they’ll probably let themselves be taken to the oblivion.

The arm behind Jaemin’s waist remains firm, like Jeno is so scared the former will run away if he ever releases his grip. 

There's something different with the way Jaemin is studying his face. It's like there's the want for more, trying to find something that is not explicitly written. Jeno is swayed infinitely by those flawless eyes, and for a stilled moment, he can hear the magnitude of Jaemin’s roaring heartbeat just as much as his own.

A hand reaches up to cup Jaemin’s face tenderly, and Jeno throws him a beautiful smirk again. “Do we really have to take my measurements tonight?”

“What do you mean?” Jaemin tries to neglect the soothing circles that Jeno is digging into the skin of his back. “O-Of course we have—”

“I mean, I have other plans in mind… I know you do too,” Jeno leans in to whisper hoarsely into his ear. “Don’t you, Jaemin?”

“T-Tea break!” Jaemin shoves him off, although the redness inking along his neck betrays him. “I’m just gonna put those snacks in the kitchen.” With that, he huffs off by himself.

“Tea break?” Jeno gloats over his behaviour, feeling amused. “But it’s 10pm…” 

Despite the questionable statement, Jeno shrugs it off and ends up following behind the trail of his lover.

—

“...And with this recognition, we hope to foster younger talents who are passionate and goal-driven, and view Mr Lee as one of their role models in this industry, who has shown inexplicable commitment and dignity in making the community a safer and trusted place. I hereby present this award to honour Mr Lee, in attaining the highest degree of merit to commemorate his integrity, excellency and service that he has contributed throughout the years. Mr Lee, please.”

When the Leader of the Board wraps up his congratulatory speech, Jeno rises. 

The whole room erupts in a fit of applauses as Jeno struts down the aisle in his pristine black suit, bowing with deep humility to his other seated colleagues as he travels towards the stage to receive his well-deserved award. 

In the sea of familiar people, is his own beloved person who has seen him at his best and worst, smiling proudly as he adornes the spectators with pride and glory.

Their eyes connect and it holds so much mutual respect and regards. 

In those few seconds, Jaemin mouths out something. Jeno can’t audibly hear what it is, but he can read them perfectly: You did well, my Jeno.

Being the star of today’s event, Jeno has been super popular.

After his photo-taking session with the big bosses of the company, journalists and media have been swarming around him as they fight for a piece of his time to include in their respective interviews.

Jaemin has been watching from the sidelines, completely letting Jeno shine in his moment undisturbed. He’s just been quietly taking photos of the whole function, so that Jeno will have some digital memories to keep in the long run when he reminisces about his career path.

“Fancy a drink, Sir?”

A waiter comes up to him, serving a tray of champagne glasses.

“No, but thank you for your offer,” Jaemin rejects the gesture. He prefers to stay completely sober as he watches Jeno flourish like a budding flower today.

“You seem unaffected without me by your side,” A benevolent voice creeps from behind. “I’m hurt.”

Jaemin marvels sideways to meet with Jeno’s irresistible eye smiles, one that has nestled a home in his heart unalterably.

Jaemin folds his arms challengingly. “Because you seemed busy today, my superstar.

“Never too busy for you though.”

“Jeno,” Jaemin furiously whispers. “Your superiors might be watching!”

“And…? I’m the one with two prizes today, not them.”

“Two?” Jaemin muses faintly.

“Yeah. The trophy and you, of course,” Jeno smirks widely.

“Smooth-talker,” Jaemin giggles. He then looks at Jeno, really looks at him properly from underneath his lashes, and adjusts the fine lapels of his suit. 

“Sorry I’ve been leaving you on your own, it’s just that so many people are trying to make small talks with me and I have to humour them,” Jeno tells him truthfully, pouting to gain his attention.

“You look so handsome in a suit, Jeno. All these people have their eyes on you today,” Jaemin compliments him in a daze. Varied emotions are engulfing Jaemin as Jeno is truly real before him, his brown hair neatly tousled back, his defined jawline and his strong eyes firing with confidence. “This is the proudest I've been of you.”

“You touch me for days and night and still think I'm not real?" Jeno shamelessly brags. "Thankfully, it's mutual."

"You—"

"Now you’re starting to sound a lot like my bosses,” Jeno goes appalled, that playful smirk be damned. “But thanks, sweetheart. You made this happen, and just so you know, I only have my eyes for you too.”

“I’m glad. Sounds like a promotion is coming your way then,” Jaemin tiptoes slightly to plant a shy kiss on Jeno’s cheek. “After this function ends, let’s head over to a nice place for dinner. My treat.”

“Oh? I’m excited.”

“Yeah, you better be! I’ve booked a reservation at a sky deck restaurant. Took me weeks to be able to make a successful one. It’s that popular…”

“Aww, you surprise me everyday, baby,” Jeno praises him as he pinches his cheek.

Jaemin smiles. “We’ll have a ball of time.”

“Jaemin! Since you’re here too, let’s take a photo together!”

“Seems like I’m not the only popular one today,” Jeno remarks as he shakes his head noncommittally when he sees Mark and Renjun waving towards them with all their energy.

“They are an enthusiastic bunch,” Jaemin agrees light-heartedly.

“Go,” Jeno nudges him gently. “They’re gonna whine if I hold you back. Don’t be gone for too long though… I’ll start falling apart.”

“Oh my gosh,” Jaemin rolls his eyes in exasperation. “I’ll be back before you know it.”

“Mhm, okay.”

Jeno watches Jaemin’s back gradually fade into the distance as he meets up with his other friends, and the sight of his worlds clashing rekindles warmth within his soul.

In life, they say that you will meet 3 kinds of love.

The first love is said to be written like a fairy tale.

The type of affection that’s defined to be like puppy love, the one that consumes your mind almost every second and leaves an illusion that it will last forever. Which is mostly untrue because most people experience it first in high school, and they do not usually work out after our young and immature hearts grow apart or can’t cope with said differences. The heartbreak that follows can feel heavy, but it’s not impossible to recover from.

Jeno has moved on from his first love.

The intense love is the second form of love.

The rulebreaker, or the game changer. It’s the kind of love that can turn our world upside down, and we often experience a whole range of beautiful to ugly emotions. This type of love usually moulds a person into growth, and oftentimes this love makes us want to cater to the other person perfectly. In the process, one might have lost themself trying to do so, which would leave someone indescribably broken and torn. 

Jeno has also experienced an intense love, one that had consumed and tormented him so much it took him years and years to rebound from that trauma, which he then conditioned himself that he’s better off without being attached to anyone.

And lastly, unconditional love is the final kind of love, which Jeno never thought he would ever attain in this lifetime.

After promising himself to focus on his career and personal growth, Jeno has been able to heal through time.

Yet suddenly, a brunette stumbles into his life, catches him off-guard, and overhauls his systematic life. It’s unprepared, but complete. It’s clumsy, but sincere. It’s unnerving, but patient.

It's flawed, yet beautiful.

Jaemin embraces him as he is; all his imperfections, all their nuances, and all his strengths. Jeno grows alongside him as they continually inspire each other to be the better versions of themselves. True love does exist and it is possible to feel completely secured, protected, and adored by another human.

Time to time, Jaemin and Jeno discusses what the future will hold, the obstacles they might face, but nothing they cannot overcome. The beginning might differ from the ending, but the story they share will not falter with time.

Because Jaemin will always be unconditional love in his own form, for Jeno.

Jeno is glad to have met all 3 kinds of love and Jaemin completes it by being his last.

He thinks back about Jaemin’s efforts of customising a classy suit and booking a fancy high-end restaurant for the two of them to end this significant date. 

In hindsight, Jaemin had been so tight-lipped and secretive about them whenever Jeno would pry into his laptop and ask what he was doing each time the latter came over.

Well, Jaemin isn’t the only one capable of surprises though. 

Jeno slips his hand into one of his pockets. A jovial smile tugs on the edges of his lips when his fingers come in contact with it.

Jaemin will surely love this too.

Tonight, a red velvet ring box awaits its owner.