Chapter Text
Bootyyyshaker9000 has created a new server
Bootyyyshaker9000: Alright, it’s time
Bootyyyshaker9000: Initiating Project Jackson
Bootyyyshaker9000 has added S.H.E.L.L.D.O.N. to the server
S.H.E.L.L.D.O.N.: what’s up, dee?
Bootyyyshaker9000: I’m going to activate the connector
S.H.E.L.L.D.O.N.: ohhhhhhh, rad! alright let’s do it
Bootyyyshaker9000: /activate DDC
S.H.E.L.L.D.O.N.: Digital Dimension Connector has been activated.
S.H.E.L.L.D.O.N.: Add users?
Bootyyyshaker9000: /add
S.H.E.L.L.D.O.N. has added CaptainFearless, redhots, #1genius, and SkaterSupreme to the server
redhots: what the fuck
redhots: what is this?
CaptainFearless: Donnie, did you do something?
Bootyyyshaker9000: Why yes, yes I did
#1genius: ????
Bootyyyshaker9000: Hello, everyone. My name is Donatello, and I’m from an alternate dimension
#1genius: ohhh that explains it
SkaterSupreme: YOOOOOO
redhots: not this fucking shit again
Bootyyyshaker9000: Again?
CaptainFearless: We once had an alternate Donnie from 1987 create a dimensional portal that connected our worlds.
SkaterSupreme: 87 Dee was so cool!!!
Bootyyyshaker9000: That is minorly disappointing
Bootyyyshaker9000: However, the show must go on
redhots: what the hell does that mean
Bootyyyshaker9000 has added Nexuschamp9000, LIKEABOSS, and magic_mike to the server
magic_mike: OMGGGGG DONNIE YOU DID IT???
Bootyyyshaker9000: Yes indeed, Michael
LIKEABOSS: Donnie, what is this?
Bootyyyshaker9000: A bet successfully won
Bootyyyshaker9000: Pay up, Nardo
Nexuschamp9000: oh you’ve gotta be kidding me
CaptainFearless: Hello? I’m Leonardo, are you all Other-Donnie’s brothers?
Nexuschamp9000: *gag*
Nexuschamp9000: ALTERNATE ME USES PROPER GRAMMAR???
CaptainFearless: Sorry?
Nexuschamp9000: god idk if i can look at you rn dude
Bootyyyshaker9000: Nardo
Nexuschamp9000: donald
Bootyyyshaker9000: Give me my $20
Nexuschamp9000: ffffiiiiiinnnneee
Nexuschamp9000: sending it over rn
Nexuschamp9000: there. i portaled it to ur desk
LIKEABOSS: You couldn’t have just handed it to him? He’s right across the room.
Nexuschamp9000: if he wants his money he can walk
LIKEABOSS:
LIKEABOSS: I don’t know if you’re being lazy or petty, bro.
Nexuschamp9000: ;)
redhots: hold on, portaled??
magic_mike: nevermind that!! HI OTHER BROS!!!!
#1genius: no, no. let’s not ignore that actually
SkaterSupreme: WADDUP, BROCHACHO!!! ARE YOU ME?
#1genius: hhhhh
magic_mike: OMG MAYBE?? ARE YOU MIKEY???
SkaterSupreme: YEAH BRO
magic_mike: :DDDD HI!!!!!
SkaterSupreme: HI!!!!!!!
Nexuschamp9000: god you two are adorable
LIKEABOSS: Hey, guys? Can we maybe do introductions? Raph’s getting confused.
CaptainFearless: I agree.
#1genius: sure thing
#1genius: my name’s Donnie, but I can go by Don to separate me from other-me
Bootyyyshaker9000: In that case I’ll be Donnie
redhots: raph
redhots: and before anyone says anything i’m keeping the nickname
LIKEABOSS: Okay…I’m also Raph. I don’t know what my nickname should be.
magic_mike: OMG!! bro we can call you raphie
redhots:
redhots: you know what, i’ll take raphael. no way in hell am i calling him that
LIKEABOSS: Yeah…it would’ve been weird hearing anyone other than my bros call me that.
LIKEABOSS: I guess that makes me Raph then! ^^
CaptainFearless: I can go by Leonardo.
Nexuschamp9000: bro what is up with the boring full names? i’ll be leon
CaptainFearless: Do you not like me or something?
Nexuschamp9000: nahhh i just have a vendetta against caps /srs /lh
CaptainFearless: But your username is capitalized?
Nexuschamp9000: that’s just so i can match with donnie
CaptainFearless: Ok, gotcha. :thumbs-up:
SkaterSupreme: Hey other me, can I be Mikey? I don’t wanna use my full name lol
magic_mike: sure thing! i can go by michael :)
#1genius: alright, now that that’s out of the way
#1genius: @Nexuschamp9000 portals????
Nexuschamp9000: yeah?? it’s a part of my ninpo
redhots: tf is ninpo
magic_mike: YOU GUYS DON’T HAVE NINPO????
CaptainFearless: Afraid not.
Bootyyyshaker9000: Think of it as mystic abilities we all inherited from our clan
LIKEABOSS: I remember when you used to hate mystic.
Bootyyyshaker9000: Oh no, I still do. I refuse to believe that something as unpredictable as magic can’t be explained by science
Bootyyyshaker9000: I just categorize ninpo as something else entirely since it applies to us specifically
Nexuschamp9000: that’s a long way of saying you just hate the fact that you think ur mystic ability is cool so you can’t hate on it anymore
Bootyyyshaker9000: Nardo I will hack your phone
magic_mike: your ninpo is really cool though donnie!!
Bootyyyshaker9000: Of course it is. I can instantly create any technological device or weapon that comes to mind without having to use the materials needed to create them. Nothing is cooler than that
#1genius: i’m sorry you can WHAT?!?!
redhots: everybody run, the nerdfest has started
#1genius: shut up Raphael this is what every inventor dreams of
#1genius: are the weapons real? are they tangible??
Bootyyyshaker9000: They’re spiritual conjurations, but they are tangible and their power and damage output is very much real
SkaterSupreme: Bro I think Don is drooling
CaptainFearless: What are everyone else’s abilities?
LIKEABOSS: Mine’s kinda like Donnie’s except I can make giant versions of myself or my fists n stuff.
Nexuschamp9000: don’t forget the fact that you can make clones
LIKEABOSS: That too.
magic_mike: or that you have super strength when you use it!!
LIKEABOSS: That too.
Bootyyyshaker9000: Or that your projections are near-indestructible and act as force fields
LIKEABOSS: Guyyyys stop I’m blushing.
Nexuschamp9000: mmm, no <3
magic_mike: you deserve the praise, raph!!!!
Bootyyyshaker9000: What they said
LIKEABOSS: I’m gonna cry.
Bootyyyshaker9000: Suffer
redhots: jesus you guys are so different from us
CaptainFearless: I know, right?
Nexuschamp9000: yeah yeah we’re awesome
Nexuschamp9000: anyways
Nexuschamp9000: you guys basically got a hint already but i can make portals and teleport to my swords
Nexuschamp9000: i’ve switched places with raph a lot in fights n stuff too, it’s p fun
magic_mike: i can extend my nunchaku as far as i want and set them on fire
magic_mike: oh! and anything they touch can become weightless
#1genius: anything?
LIKEABOSS: Michael once threw an entire building during a fight.
Nexuschamp9000: yeah, he averages like two bus throws a week
redhots: what the fuck is wrong with you people
LIKEABOSS: Language.
redhots:
SkaterSupreme:
CaptainFearless:
#1genius:
LIKEABOSS: What? Did I do something?
LIKEABOSS: Guys?
Nexuschamp9000: dw about it bro, you probably just broke their brains a little
LIKEABOSS: Thanks, Leon. That inspires so much confidence.
Nexuschamp9000: anytime <3
redhots: ok, ignoring how weird you guys are
redhots: what kinda app is this thing anyway?
#1genius: yeah I don’t remember downloading this
Nexuschamp9000: welcome to doncord, guys
Bootyyyshaker9000: For the last time it is not Doncord, Leon
Nexuschamp9000: it’s literally just discord but purple wdym
Bootyyyshaker9000: SCOFF
Bootyyyshaker9000: EXCUSE YOU, TELLOTALK IS FAR SUPERIOR TO DISCORD
Bootyyyshaker9000: There are far less bugs in the system, voice call automatically comes equipped with an arrange of voice modules, it can function even in an area with little to no signal, it doesn’t have file limits, it is virtually impossible to hack into, AND it doesn’t autocorrect emojis
Bootyyyshaker9000: And yes. Its design is a beautiful shade of violet. That is the one accurate part of your statement
Nexuschamp9000: sure, donnie. whatever makes you feel better
Bootyyyshaker9000: I will strangle you
CaptainFearless: Are they always like this?
magic_mike: yup
LIKEABOSS: Yes.
redhots: jfc
#1genius: I’m still reeling over Raph being the most level-headed
SkaterSupreme: Ikr???? It’s totally wack
redhots: hey.
LIKEABOSS: Kinda comes with being the big brother.
LIKEABOSS: Why? Is Raphael not the same?
CaptainFearless:
SkaterSupreme: YOU’RE THE OLDEST?
LIKEABOSS: Yes???
CaptainFearless: This feels wrong on so many levels.
redhots:
CaptainFearless: No.
CaptainFearless: Raphael, no.
redhots: i dunno, leo. maybe don needs to check our ages
CaptainFearless: He does not.
#1genius: I mean, it’s entirely possible that Raphael is the oldest
#1genius: then again if I were to check there’s the very real possibility that Mikey could be the oldest
#1genius: which is just. no
CaptainFearless: We’re not checking our ages. That’s final.
redhots: sounds like something someone afraid of being number 2 would say
Nexuschamp9000: wait hold on are you saying that leonardo’s the oldest???
CaptainFearless: I am the oldest, yes.
magic_mike: woahhh! that’s so weird!!!
Bootyyyshaker9000: I have to agree, the idea of Raph not being the eldest seems very odd
LIKEABOSS: I don’t think I could handle any of you being older than me. You’re all too adorable and small for that.
Nexuschamp9000: now i can agree with me and michael being adorable
Nexuschamp9000: donnie on the other hand–
Bootyyyshaker9000: And that, my dearest brother, was strike three
Bootyyyshaker9000: You have 5 seconds
Nexuschamp9000: shit
LIKEABOSS: Language!
Bootyyyshaker9000: 5 seconds are up
Bootyyyshaker9000 went offline
Nexuschamp9000 is typing…
Nexuschamp9000 went offline
magic_mike: oh wow, donnie’s being RUTHLESS
magic_mike: i don’t think i’ve ever heard leon scream that high before
CaptainFearless: Is he ok?
LIKEABOSS: I’m sure he’s fine.
LIKEABOSS: …Nevermind I just heard Donnie’s chainsaw.
LIKEABOSS: I’ll be back.
LIKEABOSS went offline
redhots: again
redhots: what the fuck is wrong with you people
magic_mike: a lot of things! but we’re mostly functional :)
#1genius: well that’s 100% reassuring and leaves 0 doubts
magic_mike: dw we’re ok i promise!
magic_mike: i stopped hearing donnie’s chainsaw a little bit ago, so raph’s probably got it handled
magic_mike: anyway, leonardo you’re the oldest??
SkaterSupreme: Hell yeah, he is!
#1genius: well technically we’re all the same age since we were all born in the same clutch
#1genius: but yes, our Master Splinter determined that he was the oldest back when we were all babies
magic_mike: WAIT YOU’RE ALL THE SAME AGE???
#1genius: you’re not?
magic_mike: nope! raph’s 17, leon and donnie are both 16, and i’m 15
#1genius: interesting…
SkaterSupreme: WOAHHHH! You guys are so young!!
magic_mike: i mean, yeah???
magic_mike: are you not?????
SkaterSupreme: Nah dude, we’re like 20
magic_mike: WHAT?!?!
Bootyyyshaker9000 is online
LIKEABOSS is online
Bootyyyshaker9000: That’s quite fascinating, actually
Bootyyyshaker9000: @#1genius you said that you’re all a part of the same clutch? Does that mean you and your brothers are the same species?
#1genius: yes, we are. I did some studies a few years ago and figured out that we’re more than likely diamondback terrapins
#1genius: I take it that means you and your brothers aren’t the same species???
Bootyyyshaker9000: That is correct, yes
Bootyyyshaker9000: Raph is an alligator snapping turtle, I am a spiny softshell, Leon is a red-eared slider, and Michael is an ornate box turtle
#1genius: the differences between our dimensions are so wild
redhots: i thought you and leon were twins?
Bootyyyshaker9000: Biologically, no
Bootyyyshaker9000: In spirit, yes
SkaterSupreme: This is so rad
CaptainFearless: Speaking of Leon, is he ok?
LIKEABOSS: He’s fine. Nothing bad happened.
Bootyyyshaker9000: Indeed. I just temporarily blocked him from the server for 10 minutes
SkaterSupreme: You sir are ruthless
Bootyyyshaker9000: Thank you
CaptainFearless: Alright well as nice as it’s been meeting you all, my brothers and I need to go.
CaptainFearless: We were supposed to start patrolling 15 minutes ago.
LIKEABOSS: Alright! Stay safe you guys!!
redhots: will do
magic_mike: BYE GUYS!!!!! o/”
SkaterSupreme: BYE MINI ME!!!!
#1genius: whenever we next get the chance, Donnie, I’d love to sit down with you on call so we can go over how you managed to connect our devices between dimensions
Bootyyyshaker9000: Say no more, my parallel pal. I’m in
redhots: geek out later, you guys. we gotta go
#1genius: alright, alright
#1genius: bye you guys
Bootyyyshaker9000: Goodbye
magic_mike: BYE!!!
LIKEABOSS: Bye!
CaptainFearless went offline
redhots went offline
#1genius went offline
SkaterSupreme went offline
Bootyyyshaker9000: Well they seem cool
magic_mike: RIGHT?? omg i can’t wait to get a chance to talk to mikey some more! i wonder if he likes to cook, too!!
magic_mike: oh shoot, speaking of which!!! i need to get started on dinner
magic_mike: we’re having lasagna tonight ^^
LIKEABOSS: Michael have I told you how much I love you?
magic_mike: ily2 <333
Bootyyyshaker9000: Alrighty then it seems like we’re all going to head off
Bootyyyshaker9000: S.H.E.L.L.D.O.N. could you run some background checks on the server for me? I’ll look at them later and make sure the DDC is running smoothly
S.H.E.L.L.D.O.N.: sure thing, donnie!
Bootyyyshaker9000: Thank you. Come and join us for dinner whenever you want
S.H.E.L.L.D.O.N.: cool, see you in a bit dad :]
Bootyyyshaker9000 went offline
magic_mike went offline
LIKEABOSS went offline
Nexuschamp9000 is online
Nexuschamp9000: FINALLY
Nexuschamp9000: alright guys what are we talking about now?
Nexuschamp9000:
Nexuschamp9000: oh you’ve gotta be be kidding me