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Avon/Bodie; In some improbable future incarnation of Bodie, or time-warped Avon? They're both mercenary....
Avon/Cagney; Before she arrested him.
Avon/Chapel; I think she's had enough of "Brains, but no heart."
Avon/Chewbacca; Well, it's a popular theory that all Avon's problems arise from losing his teddy-bear too young. Here's one big enough to hug him back. Also bite.
Avon/Cowley; A devious ruthless idealistic Scot and a devious ruthless pragmatic technician would get along... dangerously well?
Avon/Darth Vader; Made for each other. Ask anyone.
Avon/Doyle; ...hm. Avon's supposed to like curly hair? Doyle definitely likes tall dark men with murky pasts?
Avon/Han; Avon does like smugglers.
Avon/Illya; Also gorgeous blonds.
Avon/Kirk; Only because Avon would love to drive frantic Spock, Vila, Blake, and two whole universes of Star Trek and Blake's 7 fans simultaneously .
Avon/Lacey; She'd rather have Harvey. He may snore, but he doesn't feel obliged to kill you in the morning.
Avon/Leia; If she didn't kill him first.
Avon/Luke; If Leia didn't kill Avon first.
Avon/McCoy; Only in a very seamy alternate universe.
Avon/Murphy; How could two tall dark engagingly beautiful men go wrong? Easily.
Avon/Napoleon; Very easily.
Avon/Spock; As a friend once said, "They'd stare at each other till they both froze to death, end of story." Or would they...? I find it quite believable that Avon was brought up on Vulcan, actually.
Avon/Uhura; He has devilish eyes and he never once said "Open hailing frequencies..." but his ears aren't so much.
Blake/Bodie; A Welsh nationalist nutter and a Liverpool Irish nutter? And why not?
Blake/Cagney; Cagney has a demonstrated weakness for idealists. How odd.
Blake/Chapel; Curly-haired idealists who believe in the Cause... do not usually have time to love.
Blake/Chewbacca; Who would be whose cuddly toy?
Blake/Cowley; I somehow don't think that Cowley goes for Welsh idealists.
Blake/Darth Vader; The dark side of the Force is probably all that could contain that Welsh idealist.
Blake/Doyle; Guilt-edged security. On both sides.
Blake/Han; Blake also likes smugglers.
Blake/Illya; And gorgeous blonds.
Blake/Kirk; Made for each other. Neither of them ever listen.
Blake/Lacey; She'd take him home, gift-wrapped, for Cagney... if her partner hadn't already got one.
Blake/Leia; Both charismatic leaders of the rebellion? Nah, too much competition.
Blake/Luke; They've got a lot in common. Both as thick as several short planks.
Blake/McCoy; "I'm a doctor, NOT a freedom fighter!"
Blake/Murphy; Tall, dark, handsome... and engagingly modest.
Blake/Napoleon; Tall, dark, handsome... and fully booked.
Blake/Spock; Well, Blake likes tall dark handsome reserved men, but would Spock be able to respect a man with sleeves larger than his head?
Blake/Uhura; I suppose someone who never ever said "Open hailing frequencies" (or wanted Avalon or Jenna or Cally to make like a go-go dancer) might be quite attractive at certain moments.
Bodie/Cagney; Cagney also has a weakness for tall darkhaired beautiful men with big blue eyes. How odd.
Bodie/Cally; She'd read his mind. That would take five minutes.
Bodie/Chapel; Just the start of the hurt/hurt syndrome.
Bodie/Chewbacca; Bear Necessity? Oh no, not again.
Bodie/Darth Vader; Dark side of the Force meets dark side of the force.
Bodie/Dayna; She likes beautiful men. So does he.
Bodie/Gan; I doubt it.
Bodie/Han; I really doubt it.
Bodie/Illya; Mmm. Dark and blond, very nice.
Bodie/Jenna; Mmm. Likewise.
Bodie/Kirk; Not a chance. Bodie prefers men who age with dignity.
Bodie/Lacey; She's got one wannabee macho in the family already.
Bodie/Leia; Just his type. (Beautiful, upper-class, and quietly effective.) But is he hers?
Bodie/Luke; Han Solo would never have got a look in.
Bodie/McCoy; Only in a really seamy alternate universe.
Bodie/Napoleon; An arranged marriage?
Bodie/Servalan; He might survive the experience. But I doubt it.
Bodie/Soolin; Out of his semi-South African mercenary past?
Bodie/Spock; What would T'Pau say? ("Bring back T'Pring - she was safer!")
Bodie/Tarrant; Maybe in a "Jane" story.
Bodie/Travis; Well, they had their chance, at a quiet weekend in the country minus artificial arm and eyepatch, and didn't take it. I think.
Bodie/Uhura; She has more sense.
Bodie/Vila; Does Bodie like cute? We know Vila likes tall dark and badtempered.
Cagney/Cally; Wish-fulfillment. On my part, at least; but why should they be consulted?
Cagney/Chapel; Another doomed unromance.
Cagney/Chewbacca; Does Cagney prefer hairy men?
Cagney/Cowley; Older men?
Cagney/Darth Vader; Impotent men?
Cagney/Doyle; Guilt-ridden liberal men?
Cagney/Gan; Tall broad and incapable men?
Cagney/Han; Well, he's gorgeous....
Cagney/Illya; Well, he's pretty....
Cagney/Jenna; Yum. Yum. Yum.
Cagney/Kirk; No way. Not ever. Not even once.
Cagney/Leia; Rebel Imperial Princess meets streetwise New York cop. OK, but where do we go from here?
Cagney/Luke; If she wanted pretty boys, she could have Harvey Junior.
Cagney/McCoy; You're a doctor, not a.... well, whatever.
Cagney/Murphy; Tall dark beautiful and silent. Perfect.
Cagney/Napoleon; Tall dark chinful and talks too much. Not quite.
Cagney/Servalan; She does have some sense of self-preservation. So does Cagney.
Cagney/Soolin; Blond and blond, nice as spice.
Cagney/Spock; What would T'Pau say? (I don't know, but I'd like to hear it.)
Cagney/Tarrant; If she didn't want Esbecki, why would she want him?
Cagney/Travis; Only to get away from Tarrant.
Cagney/Uhura; Blond and dark, and why not?
Cagney/Vila; Cute. Too cute.
Cally/Chapel; Just what Chapel needs. Ask any Vulcan.
Cally/Chewbacca; As one Token Alien to another Token Alien; get huggable!
Cally/Cowley; Cowley wouldn't get along at all well with someone who could read his mind.
Cally/Darth Vader; She'd take one look at his light-sabre and die laughing.
Cally/Doyle; She's equable, ethical, and not too delicate-minded to live; therefore Doyle probably wouldn't appreciate her.
Cally/Han; Well, he's a pretty smuggler, and Cally likes pretty smugglers....
Cally/Illya; Another one to take care of...
Cally/Kirk; Since telepathic aliens who fall in love with Kirk are inevitably doomed (unless they have pointy ears) it's unthinkable. Y'hear?
Cally/Lacey; Mmmm.
Cally/Leia; Mmmmmm.
Cally/Luke; Hm. And another poor helpless male....
Cally/McCoy; She'd make him take over in the medical unit, being sick and tired of playing nurse to a bunch of atelepathic aliens.
Cally/Murphy; Hm. He's not a poor helpless male, he's got a rather nice smile, and he's not compelled to kill his lover in the morning. It has possibilities.
Cally/Napoleon; Can't quite see it.
Cally/Spock; T'Pau would probably rather like this one, actually.
Cally/Uhura; Check with Dayna if Cally likes dark beautiful women.
Chapel/Chewbacca; Every nurse needs a teddy-bear.
Chapel/Cowley; She's not tall, dark, and blue-eyed; and Controllers of CI5 don't love. Except after dark with the shutters closed tight.
Chapel/Darth Vader; Dark Lords of the Sith don't love either.
Chapel/Dayna; Never date a woman who's liable to stand up, yell "YOU!!", draw her gun, fire, and miss, every time a pale woman with very short dark hair walks through the door.
Chapel/Doyle; Nor a man who's apt to be racked with guilt regularly.
Chapel/Gan; But a man who thinks chucking hairy aliens about is healthy exercise might be kind of refreshing.
Chapel/Han; A smuggler who travels with a wookie? It's gotta be a mistake.
Chapel/Illya; He's blond, cool, and reserved. Doesn't ring the changes all that much.
Chapel/Jenna; A smuggler who loved and left would probably be a welcome relief.
Chapel/Lacey; But a cop who loved and stayed would be even better.
Chapel/Leia; Troublesome. But gorgeous.
Chapel/Luke; "Run along, dear, and play with Wesley."
Chapel/Murphy; Gorgeous. But apt to go mountain-climbing.
Chapel/Napoleon; Nice reputation. But you risk Thrush.
Chapel/Servalan; Chapel's got enough trouble.
Chapel/Soolin; No, really enough trouble.
Chapel/Travis; No, really .
Chapel/Tarrant; No.
Chapel/Vila; Why not?
Chewbacca/Cowley; Well, teddy-bear stories have been written for the other two....
Chewbacca/Dayna; Gaudy, but effective.
Chewbacca/Doyle; Both golden and furry, according to some writers.
Chewbacca/Gan; Made for each other. Ask any droid.
Chewbacca/Illya; Snuggle up, sweetums.
Chewbacca/Jenna; Jenna's demonstrated preference is not for hairy men.
Chewbacca/Kirk; Yeah.
Chewbacca/Lacey; Teddy-bears are not for grown-up cops.
Chewbacca/McCoy; Just what the doctor ordered. But which doctor, witch-doctor?
Chewbacca/Murphy; Does Chewbacca like climbing?
Chewbacca/Napoleon; Does Chewbacca like honey? With Wasps?
Chewbacca/Servalan; Better-looking than Jarvik, and twice as hairy. How could they miss?
Chewbacca/Soolin; Does a mercenary gunfighter need a teddy-bear? Doesn't everyone?
Chewbacca/Spock; What would T'Pau say? ("Awww...", probably, like the rest of us.)
Chewbacca/Tarrant; Beauty and the Beast. But which is which?
Chewbacca/Travis; The Beast and the... beast?
Chewbacca/Uhura; He can't sing but he doesn't ask his partners to make like go-go dancers either. Why not?
Chewbacca/Vila; Now this I can believe, no trouble at all. Furry and cuddly and big enough to scare the Delta-Eating Snooger-Booger away at night.
Cowley/Darth Vader; He'd be working for CI5 inside a week.
Cowley/Dayna; So would she.
Cowley/Gan; But I think MI5 would get Gan.
Cowley/Han; And MI6, Han.
Cowley/Illya; Waverly would NOT be amused.
Cowley/Jenna; Nor would Blake.
Cowley/Kirk; But Starfleet would think it was hilarious.
Cowley/Lacey; I don't think Lacey goes for the wiry type.
Cowley/Leia; I don't think Cowley approves of rebel royalty.
Cowley/Luke; Obi-Wan Kenobi, eat your heart out!
Cowley/McCoy; Just as likely to talk back as Dr Ross; and Cowley's weakness is for big blue eyes.
Cowley/Napoleon; Actually, Waverly might think this was pretty funny.
Cowley/Servalan; What happens when the supremely irresistible force meets the Scottish immovable object?
Cowley/Soolin; An explosion.
Cowley/Spock; What would T'Pau say? (She and Cowley are probably kindred spirits, mind you.)
Cowley/Tarrant; Nah. Not even for curly hair.
Cowley/Travis; Travis would be palmed off onto MI17 with extreme prejudice.
Cowley/Uhura; Could the man who fell for Annie Irving really appreciate Uhura?
Cowley/Vila; You think I'm joking, don't you? Well, maybe. I don't think Cowley likes cute.
Darth Vader/Dayna; "Without danger, there's no pleasure..." but honey, this is overdoing it.
Darth Vader/Doyle; Dark side of the force meets rebellious side of the Force.
Darth Vader/Gan; Darth crushes his mind. Gan doesn't notice.
Darth Vader/Illya; Dark and blond; to be avoided.
Darth Vader/Jenna; Likewise.
Darth Vader/Kirk; Hell, I'd throw him at Vader!
Darth Vader/Lacey; Never. He doesn't even snore.
Darth Vader/McCoy; Even I cannot imagine the seaminess required.
Darth Vader/Murphy; After coping with Cowley, Darth Vader would be a rest cure.
Darth Vader/Napoleon; And after coping with Waverly and Thrush, the Dark Lord of the Sith would be a pleasant holiday...
Darth Vader/Servalan; The two Federations would merge - and then deity help all civilised life in the universe.
Darth Vader/Soolin; To be avoided forcibly. Pun intended.
Darth Vader/Spock; What would T'Pau say? ("T'Pring was bad enough!")
Darth Vader/Tarrant; Actually, I rather like the idea.
Darth Vader/Travis; I think Travis would rather like the idea. Not sure if Vader would.
Darth Vader/Uhura; Over my dead body. Ulp.
Darth Vader/Vila; The hurt part of hurt/comfort. Bad hurt/comfort.
Dayna/Doyle; It does seem to be a rule of the universe that curly hair doesn't mix. Besides, what would they talk about?
Dayna/Han; We've never seen Dayna's reaction to pretty smugglers, have we?
Dayna/Illya; Dark and gold, pretty to watch. But they'd both kill each other in the morning, or sooner.
Dayna/Kirk; According to some commentators on the sport, he's pretty.
Dayna/Lacey; Persephone complex. Go look it up.
Dayna/Leia; Mm. Maybe. If they could both distract themselves from killing other people.
Dayna/Luke; She's not old enough for gauche innocence to appeal.
Dayna/McCoy; He's a surgeon, not a psychiatrist.
Dayna/Murphy; According to many fanciers, he's beautiful. Is it dark killers he goes for, or curly hair?
Dayna/Napoleon; Nah.
Dayna/Spock; What would T'Pau say? ("Gerroff! I want her!")
Dayna/Uhura; Cross Star Wars with The Color Purple and maybe you've got it.
Doyle/Gan; Devious undercover cop meets direct man of nonviolence...
Doyle/Han; And why not?
Doyle/Illya; When they met, it was murder.
Doyle/Jenna; He'd try to arrest her. She'd find a highly-advanced ship and escape. All in all, why bother?
Doyle/Kirk; What a revolting thought.
Doyle/Lacey; She leaves guilt-ridden liberals to Cagney.
Doyle/Leia; We already did rebel Imperial Princess meets streetwise cop.
Doyle/Luke; Shades of young Benny?
Doyle/McCoy; Mouse and cheese...
Doyle/Napoleon; If Doyle could just stop giggling every time Napoleon told him he had Thrush.
Doyle/Servalan; Doyle does have a habit of falling for incredibly unsuitable (and/or dangerous) women - doesn't he?
Doyle/Soolin; Yes; he does.
Doyle/Spock; What would T'Pau say? ("I told you before not to bring your pet sehlats into the house.")
Doyle/Tarrant; Well, they both have curly hair.
Doyle/Travis; Travis chases men with curly hair.
Doyle/Uhura; Uhura's hair is curlier.
Doyle/Vila; Another teddy-bear story.
Gan/Han; He's already got one wookie.
Gan/Illya; Odd, but appealling.
Gan/Kirk; Not tonight, Captain, I've got a headache.
Gan/Lacey; He's probably the nearest thing to Harvey she'd find in that universe.
Gan/Leia; Does she want a teddy-bear? He seems to like being one.
Gan/Luke; I can just see them, settling down together on a farm on Tatooine.
Gan/McCoy; Gan has no reason to like surgeons... but McCoy would find the limiter problem medically irresistible.
Gan/Murphy; I'm sure they have something in common. Not sure what.
Gan/Napoleon; They have even less in common.
Gan/Spock; What would T'Pau say? ("Good grief... Kroykah!!!")
Gan/Uhura; Does she really go for beefy beefcake?
Han/Illya; Stunning. Literally.
Han/Jenna; Pretty pilot meets pretty pilot. The Millenium Liberated.
Han/Kirk; You know, there could be a movie in this.
Han/Lacey; Hm.
Han/McCoy; Hmm.
Han/Murphy; Hmmm.
Han/Napoleon; Mm-hmmm.
Han/Servalan; Mmmmmmmm.
Han/Soolin; Nah.
Han/Spock; What would T'Pau say? ("Ga-noog is ga-noog. Spock, your cat is dead.")
Han/Tarrant; Actually, Del probably worked for Han before he joined up with the Liberator....
Han/Travis; Better than Darth Vader. A bit.
Han/Uhura; Better than Kirk. A little.
Han/Vila; Cuter than Chewbacca... if it's cute you want.
Illya/Jenna; Blond, bland, bloody-minded, irresistible.
Illya/Kirk; Kirk probably does have Thrush.
Illya/Lacey; Adopt-A-Russian week....
Illya/Leia; Streetwise Russian meets rebel Imperial Princess, for a twist.
Illya/Luke; Boy-toy meets toy-boy.
Illya/McCoy; Hot blue eyes meet... in complete disinterest. They both prefer brunets.
Illya/Murphy; Yum.
Illya/Servalan; Yummier.
Illya/Soolin; Do blonds have more fun?
Illya/Spock; What would T'Pau say? (Nothing at all. She'd just quietly acquire him for herself.)
Illya/Tarrant; "Del, can you spell DISEMBOWELMENT? No? Then how about CASTRATION?"
Illya/Travis; Enjoy or scream, dear reader; the choice is yours.
Illya/Uhura; Better than Chekov. Though he also might have a crush on Spock.
Illya/Vila; Harmless meets harmless. This is obviously a new use of the word 'erotic' that I was not previously aware of.
Jenna/Kirk; A match made in rogue scriptwriter heaven. But over my dead body.
Jenna/Lacey; If Jenna's looking for a reliable partner; and if Lacey's looking for a blond bombshell.
Jenna/Leia; Space-wise smuggler meets rebel Imperial princess... there's only so many ways to script this movie, but I think I like this one best.
Jenna/Luke; She'd sooner have his sister. He'd sooner have his father.
Jenna/McCoy; Hm. In an alternate universe, he was captured from an Imperial starship by a fiery Corellian smuggler... or something.
Jenna/Murphy; Yummiest, for the perversely heterosexual taste.
Jenna/Napoleon; Too much chin and not enough sleeve for Jenna; even if Napoleon likes blonds.
Jenna/Spock; She and T'Pau would settle down for a civilised discussion on Vulcan's trading problems. Jenna would come out of it with a fat contract and the hand of T'Pau's grandson in marriage.
Jenna/Uhura; They'd have a lot to talk about. And both are good at action, when required.
Kirk/Lacey; I suppose he'd be better than Esbecki, but who wouldn't be? At least he's away a lot.
Kirk/Leia; She'd prefer Darth Vader.
Kirk/Luke; So would he.
Kirk/Murphy; Kirk may like them tall, dark, and handsome, but so does Murphy.
Kirk/Napoleon; I think he'd rather have Waverly.
Kirk/Servalan; Yes. Yes. YES! Crystal daggers in the back! Go, go, go!
Kirk/Soolin; Over his dead body.
Kirk/Tarrant; Go ahead. But I don't want to watch.
Kirk/Travis; Well, they're both good Federation officers, aren't they?
Kirk/Vila; I can hear Vila saying "Captain, I'm frightened."
Lacey/Leia; She'd join the rebellion.
Lacey/Luke; She'd adopt him.
Lacey/McCoy; She'd introduce him to her mother-in-law.
Lacey/Murphy; She'd ask him home for Michael.
Lacey/Napoleon; She'd send him on to Harvey Junior.
Lacey/Servalan; Servalan would get Esbecki. Gift-wrapped.
Lacey/Soolin; Blond competent gunfighter - hm.
Lacey/Spock; What would T'Pau say? ("Thank God - stay with him!")
Lacey/Tarrant; Esbecki would get Tarrant. They deserve each other.
Lacey/Travis; She'd think he was a robot toy for the kids.
Lacey/Uhura; A kindred spirit.
Lacey/Vila; I think she'd keep this one for herself.
Leia/McCoy; McCoy would either commit her, or join the rebellion, after about a minute.
Leia/Murphy; She's a suave tough cookie; so's he. Just try to imagine the circumstances under which they might find each other's chocolate chips.
Leia/Napoleon; She isn't the type either to seduce a secret agent for information or to be dazzled by a sophisticated and witty (1950's) s.a. - but maybe he could be captured and she could rescue him, if she didn't have anything more important to do, like talk to a 'droid....
Leia/Servalan; An exercise in haughty defiance, whoever chained whom to a cellar wall.
Leia/Soolin; "Did the earth move for you too?" - "Yes. They're bombing the base."
Leia/Spock; T'Pau doesn't approve of her family marrying beneath their position; human rebel royalty is Right Out.
Leia/Tarrant; Get real.
Leia/Travis; Hurt/comfort. And Vader does it better.
Leia/Uhura; Sisters unite in armed snuggle.
Leia/Vila; She'd burst into his cabin, throw him onto the bed - and frisk him.
Luke/McCoy; Searching for a Jedi Knight...
Luke/Murphy; who's tall, dark, and engagingly modest...
Luke/Napoleon; with a nice line in chatting up a boy...
Luke/Servalan; to protect him from evil...
Luke/Soolin; and deliver him from credulity
Luke/Spock; (and the looks of a warrior elf)
Luke/Tarrant; and the manners of a well-brought up cadet
Luke/Travis; and the ability of an old soldier
Luke/Uhura; whose career is not winding down
Luke/Vila; would be just perfect.
McCoy/Murphy; "I'm a doctor, not a mountaineer!"
McCoy/Napoleon; "Or a Wasp!" (He is a WASP, but let's not break his heart.)
McCoy/Servalan; "Or suicidal!"
McCoy/Soolin; "Or stupid!"
McCoy/Tarrant; "Or a masochist!"
McCoy/Travis; "Or in need of hurt/comfort!"
McCoy/Vila; However, maybe they could check out some Romulan ale together?
Murphy/Napoleon; Tall, dark, and noncommittal. Like likes like?
Murphy/Servalan; She would love him like she loves chocolate icecream.
Murphy/Soolin; Sincere, perhaps, but short-lived.
Murphy/Spock; Irresistable. But not to each other.
Murphy/Tarrant; Ho-hum. I suppose anything, once.
Murphy/Travis; Purely a professional relationship.
Murphy/Uhura; But this isn't reality - Every Starfleet commander's got a fantasy.
Murphy/Vila; Well, maybe they could get some serious hugging done.
Napoleon/Servalan; The man from - ahem - A.U.N.T.I.E.?
Napoleon/Soolin; A relationship that would go with a bang.
Napoleon/Spock; What would T'Pau say? (A great deal, probably, and none of it polite.)
Napoleon/Tarrant; Both together now, "I'm handsomer than you, quicker than you, more successful than you - " *BANG*
Napoleon/Travis; Illya is prettier. Blake is more dramatic. Sheer boredom on both sides.
Napoleon/Uhura; I am finally tired of Thrush jokes.
Napoleon/Vila; Napoleon would be charming, witty, and urbane. Vila would be bored.
Servalan/Spock; What would T'Pau say? (Nothing. She'd stab her in the back of the neck for his own good.)
Servalan/Uhura; Good goddess. And she'd need to be -
Soolin/Spock; What would T'Pau say? ("Thank you, dear. A new assassin, how considerate.")
Soolin/Uhura; This made astonishing sense, by the time I'd dismissed the rest of the list as tiresomely obvious.
Spock/Tarrant; If he wanted brave and impetuous, he could have had Kirk.
Spock/Travis; Over Spock's dead body. Of course, that's entirely possible.
Spock/Vila; Maybe cute would make a change from Southern, or Starship Captain, gallantry. But what would Amanda say?
Travis/Uhura; Enough. Kroykah!
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