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Ben walks up to Callum when he's sitting on the bench at the park.
"You had to get away from the Mrs. didn't you? Needed a break from pretending?" Ben teased.
Callum didn't look up and said "leave me alone" in a whisper.
"Now why would I do that?"
Callum keeps his eyes on his hands and says more defiantly, "I don't want to talk to you Ben. Go find another bloke and stay away from me." Ben raises an eyebrow and scoffs as if to say 'really' Ben goes to turn away and Callum feels relief flow through his body, but disappears when he hears him stop.
Ben turns his head and says over his shoulder "you'd better me careful mate or I might just go have a nice little chat with your Whit. Tell her all about what her innocent little Callum's been getting up to."
Callum's hear dropped and he was barely able to whisper "Ben please don't, she's all I've got left." But Ben ignored his plea and walked away.
Callum started to panic and drops his head into his hands. He stayed like that until he could muster up the courage to drag himself home. On his way back, he tried to steady his breathing so he wouldn't worry Whitney.
When he reached the front door, he slowly turned the knob and closed the door as quietly as he could behind him. He was exhausted and could practically feel his body begging him for sleep. As he made his way into their bedroom, he spotted Whitney curled up on the bed. He laid down fully dressed beside her, not having the energy to undress.
He closed his eyes and forced himself to push Ben out of his head, along with it the anxiety that was flooding through his body.
He's jolted away by a loud crashing in the kitchen. He jumps up and runs there to find Whitney looking sheepish when she sees just how worried he looks.
Callum's eyes are wide with both fear and pure adrenaline. He's breathing hard with his eyes darting around the room as he tries to make sense of what's happening. Whitney goes to apologize but Callum's ears are ringing. He can't stay here.
He turns and runs out the front door, oblivious to Whitney calling his name. He only makes it a block before he realizes he's not wearing shoes, the one piece of clothing he'd taken off the night before. By this point, his breathing is starting to return to normal and he leans against an alley wall.
He thinks over what just happened and cringes when he thinks about how he just ran out on Whitney without so much as a word. He realizes that she was only trying to make him breakfast and feels the guilt start to seep in.
As he turns to leave the alley and apologize to Whitney, he runs right into someone else. He hears them curse and yell " Hey! watch what your do-" and then a quiet "Callum". The person reaches out and gently touches him on the arm. Callum flinches away and falls to the ground, curling into himself, protecting his head and stomach like Stu taught him.
The person says something to him but Callum can't hear him. All he hears is his dad yelling at him, saying how weak he is and how he's disgusting. He can smell the whiskey on his breath and flinches when he feels a hand touching his cheek, expecting a slap. He hears them softly whisper "It's okay Cal, I'm not gonna hurt you. You're safe."
And soon Callum's surroundings start to come back, and he slowly relaxes and uncurls himself. When he opens his eyes, he sees familiar blue eyes staring softly at him. "Ben?" he whispers, confused.
Ben's eyes don't change as he says "It's okay Callum" and sits him up. All Callum can focus on is Ben's gaze on him until he hears an "are you okay?" from behind him. He looks around and sees a small crowd staring at him. He puts on his most reassuring smile and shakes Ben's hands off him.
He goes to stand up, but can feel his legs wobble beneath his body. He grabs the wall for support and says "I'm okay." He goes to walk away when Ben grabs his arm and says "At least let me take you home. To Whitney." Callum nods and lets Ben guide him back.
When Callum nearly collapses about a minute later, Ben sits him on a bench and sighs when Callum closes his eyes and turns his head away. Ben is quiet for a moment before asking "what was that Callum?" Callum's getting angry with how much care is in Ben's voice. He's had enough. He shakes his head, pushes himself up, and starts to walk away. Ben lets him.
When he finally gets to his flat, his eyes are drooping shut and his hands are shaking. When he finally opens the door, he tries to go straight to bed, but is blocked by an angry Whitney, no concern left on her face from that morning.
"Where were you? I had to cancel our table for lunch!" She turns away and grips at her hair as she raises her voice, yelling "you are so selfish, you never stop to think about anyone but yourself."
He tried weakly to explain, but she stopped him with a wave of her hand when he barely got out "Whit, let me explain- ".
She scoffed and screamed "No, I don't want to see you here tonight, you can find somewhere else to sleep." When he didn't move, she lunged forwards and shoved him towards the door.
He stumbled back and flinched as she yells "GO", but turned around and hurried out the door. He was fully aware he was crying but he honestly couldn't care less who saw him as he walked through the market. He managed to get through without anyone stopping him. He doesn't know where he's going but refuses to stop to think. He's forced to confront his thoughts when he feels nausea rush through his body.
He stumbles into an alley and vomits the little food he's consumed in the past day. When he's done, he starts walking away, but has to sit down to suppress the remaining nausea. He lets his mind drift to Whitney. He things about how she doesn't want him anymore.
He doesn't blame her.
He's been selfish and hasn't been giving her what she needs lately. He starts crying at the thought of pushing her away and her inevitably leaving him for someone better.
He jumps when he hears a voice say "Callum". He sluggishly looks up at Ben and realizes he must look terrible. He looks away and feels Ben slide down beside him. When he put's his hand on his hand on his arm, Callum starts to cry. He can't help it. He lets out all the pain he's feeling.
Ben stays silent and pulls Callum into a hug. He waits for him to him to calm down and only lets him go when Callum stops crying. Callum sits back up and closes his eyes, embarrassed he let Ben see him like this.
He feels overwhelmed with his feelings and mutters out "Just do it Ben."
Ben, who had been quiet up to now, turns to Callum confused and says "what?"
Callum sighs and shakes his head "Just tell everyone. Tell them whatever you'd like, I'm done."
Callum leaned his head back against the brick and waited for Ben to laugh at him or make a snarky joke. But, it never came, only a small sniffle. Callum opens his eyes and looks over to Ben, who is staring straight ahead. He shakes his head and then turns back to face Callum. Callum can see the tears threatening to fall from his eyes.
Ben manages to sob out "I'm sorry, Callum, I really am. I shouldn't have threatened to out you. You don't mess around with things like that." Ben scooted closer to Callum and put a hand on his leg. Callum stayed quiet and hesitated before leaning his head on Ben's shoulder. Callum relished in the moment before a thought popped into his head that had been there for a long time.
"I'm selfish ain't I?" Ben just looked at him and asked "why would you say even say that? You ain't selfish."
Callum kept his gaze on the wall in front of him and said "it's what Whit said, when I ran out on her this morning."
Ben looked confused and asked "why'd you run out?"
Callum gently shook his head and muttered "Because I got started awake by her cooking. She was only tying to do something nice for me and I ruined it by being weak."
Ben turned his head so they were eye to eye and said "well she were wrong. You ain't weak Callum."
Callum scoffed and said "then why can't I be happy with what I've got? Why do I want more?" His anger was disappearing with every word.
Ben quietly said "I think you already know." At these words, Callum shook his head as the silence became loud.
Ben had just leaned his head back, not expecting an answer when Callum whispered "I think..." and then paused. Ben turned expectantly towards him and waited for an answer he already knew. Callum tried again "I think I'm...." and then was silent again. Ben nodded slowly and said "say it at your own pace" and placed a hand on Callum's arm.
Callum adverted his eyes and took a deep breath before whispering "I'm gay." Ben looked at him and smiled.
Callum tried to smile back, but his lips started to tremble and a tear fell from his eye. Ben put a hand on Callum's and whispered "It's okay Callum." He tried to nod, but ended up letting out a sob.
Ben leaned in and once again pulled Callum into a hug, putting a hand at the back of his neck. Callum desperately grasped at Ben's coat and buried his face in his shoulder. Ben's other hand started rubbing up and down Callum's back comfortingly.
He sighed and then said softly "you'll work your way through this, I know you will." He pulled back from Callum and smiled, saying "you've got me." Callum wiped the tears from his eyes and smiled. He at Ben and said "yeah, I do."
Callum pulled him back into a hug, and whispered out "thank you." Ben patted his back and said "this was all you. You didn't need me."
Callum shook his head and said back "yes I did Ben, you've help me more than you could ever know."
Callum pulled back and they smiled at each other, knowing they could get through this together.