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Parker had just wanted to have a nice, quiet meal at the diner, ideally without Ben having too many complaints about the food this time around. The last time, the cook hadn’t taken too kindly to Ben’s loud condemnation of the quality of the meal they’d received, and Parker had needed to clear out right quick to avoid getting another black eye.
In retrospect, it was foolish to hope for anything in his life to be nice or quiet or peaceful.
Everything had seemed normal enough, until Ben had raised his voice to say, “Hey! Excuse me, buddy, but you seem familiar.” And a man sitting at the counter had wheeled around to look at them.
Parker’s blood immediately ran cold. There was something about the man that made every hair on the back of his neck stand on end, an overwhelming feeling of wrongness. He didn’t recognize the man at all, but the smile that crawled across his face was strikingly familiar.
Parker had seen it enough times in the mirror, spread over the lower half of his own face.
“Ah. So this is where you’ve gotten to, has it?” the man replied, looking Parker up and down. “I’m guessing you’d like to have a little chat?”
Parker tried to urge his frozen muscles into action and frantically shake his head, but Ben answered for them before he could. “Oh, absolutely.”
The too-familiar smile widened. “Lovely. Let’s take this somewhere a little more private though, hmm?” The man pushed off from his seat and grabbed Parker by the arm, steering them back out of the diner.
The hand on Parker’s arm might as well have been made out of steel, and he had no option but to follow along. Just as the diner door closed behind them both, he heard a horrible wet crunch from inside, followed by a scream. Parker shuddered and decided not to look back through the glass.
They came to a stop in a little alleyway off of the main street, and Parker hoped that it was a cloud passing over the sun that had made all the light around them suddenly seem flat and dim. He released Parker’s arm, but Parker still didn’t think much of his chances, if he tried to run.
"Well, let's cut straight to the chase, shall we? I'll admit that the amnesiac schtick is one of my favorites to watch, but no one likes it when the exposition drags on and on. Besides, we've got an audience to consider. So," the man snapped his fingers, and Parker both heard and felt Ben gasp.
"Oh. Oh, wow," Ben murmured with rising glee. "This was a great idea."
"I know, right? Honestly, I'd just been wondering what sort of pattern Artie's little friend's corpse would make when he popped like all the rest of them, but this happy little accident turned out to be even more entertaining. So tell me, how's it been from the other side of things? Having a... ground floor perspective."
"It's been interesting! Getting the real gumshoe experience has been a blast, and there's lots of things to sink my teeth into, literally and figuratively. There's a lot to be said for novelty. But Parker can be a bit of a stick in the mud, and I think I'm ready to go back now," Ben replied. "It's probably more efficient to share the experiences that way, anyhow."
"Hm, are you sure? He'll die if you leave, you know. Well, I suppose the more accurate phrase is that he'll go back to being dead."
Wait, what? Parker had been desperately hoping that discretion would be the better part of valour until now, but the conversation was taking a much more worrying turn at this point.
"Oh, he does speak! You know, the other guy who was stuck in Arthur's head never really shut up; seemed to assume that he never needed to worry about what he was saying just because most people couldn't hear him. I must say, it's nice to meet someone with manners. Or maybe you're just shy?" the man asked.
Something like that , Parker replied, feeling deeply uneasy about suddenly being at the centre of attention for the predator in front of him. Could you... elaborate on why I'd die?
"Sure! It's because you're already dead. The only reason why your body is walking around and breathing is because you have... hm, let's call it a spark of the divine, inside of you currently. Take that away, and you'll go right back to being a corpse."
"Did you hear that, Parker? Guess I'm more than just a pain in your ass, eh?" Ben asked, sounding smug. "So. How about you say thanks, huh? Before you kick the bucket again?"
Before I…?
"Yeaaaah, sorry, but I'm still not planning on sticking around to be your life support. It's too bad for you, really, but think of it this way. This was some extra time you otherwise wouldn't have had at all. Most people don't even get that much. But now, I'm ready to go home," Ben said, and paused for a heartbeat. "Well, I guess it's fine if you don't wanna say thanks. Other me, how about we finally get this show on the road?"
"Hm," the man replied, tapping his chin pensively. Then he smiled. "No."
"What? What do you mean, no?" Ben demanded.
"I mean you're not going anywhere."
"I'm not- But- But I'm you!"
The man broke into loud, unrestrained laughter at that, slapping his knee. After an extended moment, he pulled himself together and mimed wiping a tear from his eye. "Hoo, I knew that you'd be funny, but I didn't think you'd be this funny. What about you, exactly, is anything like me? You have no power, no experience, and barely even a scrap of memory."
"I'm still a part of you! We're the same, you're just--"
The man waved his hand dismissively. "Have you ever heard of the Ship of Theseus before? You know, that thought experiment where people wonder if, after every plank and nail of a ship gets replaced, is it still the same ship? There's a reason why no one wonders if a single removed nail from the boat would be considered the same as the entire ship."
"That's... but… don't you at least want to be whole again?" Ben asked, his voice smaller now.
"Buddy. Pal." The man clapped a hand on Parker's shoulder and ignored his flinch. "I say this with love, but I've been less whole after getting a haircut than I was after I peeled you off."
"Then what am I supposed to do now?!"
The man shrugged. "That's up to you. I'm just here to watch the show. Speaking of which, I'm sure you've got some things to discuss with your roommate now, so I think I'll leave you to it. See you around." He gave a little wink and salute before he sauntered past Parker and out of the alley.
There was a long, still moment where Parker just stood there, shivering, while the sensation of unreality slowly seeped away. Then he slumped against the wall of the alley and slid into a sitting position on the ground, cradling his head in his hands.
"Parker! Hey, Parker, what do you think you're doing? Get up! We need to go after him!" Ben's voice barked out.
And why would I do that? Parker replied coldly.
"Hey, fuck you, you're only alive because of me!"
And you've made it clear you'd prefer that I wasn't.
"That's- oh come on, it's not that I want you to die! I just-"
You don't care if I do, so long as it gets you what you want.
"...yeah. You're right. I don't care about what happens to you. Why should I? You're nothing! Meaningless! A speck in a sea of identical specks!" Ben snapped.
Parker sighed and closed his eyes. Well, that makes the two of us, then.
"That's… no. No, I don't accept that! I won't accept that! I matter! I- I'll show him! What the fuck does he know, anyway! He's going to come crawling back to ask for me again, that–" Ben's tirade was cut off by Parker slapping his hands over his mouth. Ben bit him, but Parker didn't let go.
How about we don't antagonize whatever horrible outer god spawned you? Parker hissed, ignoring the blood that was trickling down his palm.
Ben bit down a little harder before he unclenched his jaw and huffed a sigh against Parker's hands. Parker lowered his arms and fished around in his coat pocket for one of the bandages he kept on hand for wrapping up bleeding bitemarks. "Fiiiine. Fine. I guess you're stuck with me a while longer, Parkie."
Don't strain yourself on my account, to talk to this speck. Parker replied, tying off the bandage and getting back to his feet.
"You don't need to take it so personally , pal."
I don't take it personally. It's the opposite of personal, isn't it? I'm from Arkham, after all. I'm familiar enough with the things that consider humans as less than insects. Parker replied wearily. I'm going to try to find us a different diner.
Ben had… well, "behaved himself" wasn't really a term that ever applied to Ben, but he had acted relatively normally for the rest of the day. He hadn't gone off on any more rants, at least.
Parker had almost managed to will himself into forgetting the uncomfortable encounter entirely, but when he crawled into bed and reached over to turn the radio on for Ben, his passenger spoke up.
"Parker. I don't know what to do. What am I supposed to do?" Ben asked, sounding more than a little lost.
Just… take things one day at a time, I guess. Parker replied, adjusting the dials to bring the gentle babble of the talk radio in more clearly. And let me sleep.
"You're no help at all," Ben complained, but it didn't sound like his heart was in it, and he obligingly shut up. Probably because the announcer was saying that Dick Tracey was up next.
It wasn't exactly easy to get P.I. work when Ben insisted on spouting barely-relevant quotes from his radio plays at every potential customer they met, but they occasionally did manage it, mostly when someone was desperate or just had poor judgement.
Their current case had Parker crawling through the broken basement window of some abandoned factory, and coming across a rather unusual piece of graffiti. Sigils and scrawled representations of monsters, those he was familiar with. But this…
"It's a clock?" Ben remarked.
A specific clock. It looks just like the one you see in postcards; it's in London. The Big Ben. Parker replied. Not sure why someone would go to the trouble to-
A rumbling, discordant growl cut him off, and Parker whirled around.
The next thing he was consciously aware of was an ear-piercing whistle followed by Ben yelling, "Get up, Parker! Get up and keep your eyes on the floor, you can't look at this thing!"
Parker scrambled to his feet, unable to remember having fallen over, and kept his head down, staring at his feet and steadfastly refusing to focus his gaze on any movement in his peripheral vision. Ben, what's happening?
"Search me, pal. I don't have encyclopedic knowledge of everything that breaks human minds just by looking at it. Seems like we caught a bit of a lucky break though; it doesn't look eager to leave its spot just yet. You should probably back up slowly towards the window, okay? No sudden movements."
Parker nodded and edged back towards the wall, doing his best to leave the thing in his peripheral vision without actually letting his attention stray to it.
"Seems like it's guarding something," Ben muttered, and his observation was accompanied by a crunch. Ben sucked in a sharp breath through his teeth. "Oooh, that's not good. It's a nest, and something's hatching. Better run, Parker."
Parker dashed for the window.
It was times like this Parker missed being able to grit his teeth, he thought as he stitched up the gash on his arm. He hoped that whatever those things were, they weren't attracted to the scent of blood. He was pretty sure they had lost them, though. Would have been better if he hadn't cut himself open on the broken glass in the window frame, but it could have been a lot worse.
"You gotta start carrying a water bottle in that first aid kit too," Ben complained. "Needing to dry swallow painkillers sucks ."
I'll trade you, Parker replied dryly, tying off the stitches and shifting his arm closer to his face, pulling the thread taut. Ben bit the trailing end off.
"You think that whole thing was a bit fishy? With that clock, I mean, the Big…" Ben trailed off, clicking his tongue.
…I think you'd be able to make that call better than I would. Parker replied.
"Yeah. I guess I would. Well, I don't think he was trying to kill us or anything. More than likely he was just messing with us, seeing what would happen."
Sounds like a familiar mindset, Parker replied wryly. So . What are the odds that you would get bored and decide go play with someone else instead, next time?
"Hmn. Not good. I mean, who wants to play with new toys just once?" Ben replied. "It's more fun if you can find some favorites, and see how long…"
It takes them to break?
" Yep," Ben replied, popping his mouth around the 'p' in the word.
Parker tilted his head back and closed his eyes. Then it does sound like I'll need to invest in a better first aid kit.
Peace and quiet were things of Parker's distant past now, but when the opportunity presented itself, Parker did try to grab what moments of tranquility he could. Which was why he set down his bag and settled down onto the soft grass of a small hill, far beyond the outskirts of the city.
"Hey, Parker, what are you doing? You said you'd sleep in your car, right? There's no radio out here," Ben complained.
There's still an hour before your show comes on, relax, Parker replied, laying back and looking up at the sky. You can't see the stars like this when we're in the city.
Ben fell silent, and Parker savored the quiet and the beauty of the glittering blanket of stars spread out before them.
After almost half an hour, and just when Parker was starting to think that he should bring Ben out to stargaze more often, the quiet of the night was shattered with a wordless scream. Parker sat bolt upright.
Ben, Jesus, what the hell?! What is it, what's wrong?
Ben just screamed again, loudly and long enough that Parker could feel their shared lungs burning to be filled again. Ben finally sucked in air in a way that almost sounded like a sob. "It isn't fair!" he yelled, his voice cracking.
Ben, what? What are you–
"That! That used to be my home! I can remember, I used to be able to dance between the stars! I could go anywhere, do anything, move planets and skip between moons with a thought! I had the entire cosmos at my fingertips and now–" Ben broke off, choking on another sob. "Now I don't even have fingers! I have nothing! I'm trapped on this miserable little dirt ball, hemmed into nothing but a handful of senses! I can't go anywhere, I'm only dragged along for the ride! You– you can't even imagine what this is like, claustrophobia doesn't begin to describe it! I'm squeezed into a point smaller than a pinprick, and it's– it's never going to get better! I can't fix it! I can't leave, I can't do anything! I'll never be free!"
Ben, I–
Ben just screamed again, like if he yelled loudly enough some part of him might be able to reach the stars again.
Parker stayed silent until Ben ran out of breath and broke into shuddering, heaving sobs.
I can't imagine that the freedom of movement was all that great. Parker finally said.
"And what the fuck would you know about it?!" Ben snarled, his voice hoarse and broken.
I mean, Big Ben can go anywhere and do anything, but he chooses to fuck with us.
Parker heard Ben open and close his mouth once, but he didn't reply.
I am sorry that you're stuck with me. I know it's not what you would choose. And I bet that being able to dance between the stars would be really nice. But I also think that, when you're accustomed to seeing things on the scale of a universe, it's hard to see anything beyond the big picture. To find much of anything that's new or interesting. If you had everything from before, then you'd be just like him. And he's got freedom in spades, but he still doesn't seem very happy to me, Parker continued.
Ben didn't say anything, and Parker wondered if he'd entirely lost his voice. Instead of being hopeful at the chance of not having to listen to constant chatter, he thought about how much smaller Ben's cage would feel, if he couldn't even speak.
I can't fix this for you, but I can take us back to the car, where we've got a radio and some lozenges for your throat? Parker asked.
"Okay," Ben rasped. "...thanks."