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Jiang Cheng had decided. Or rather was finally succumb to accept that what he felt, in his heart, in all reality, was not even close to respect.

Of course, he did respect Lan Xichen. How could he not? How could anyone not? The man in his absolute tender gentleness, demanded respect and while Jiang Cheng for the life of him couldn’t figure out how he did that, he knew that there was no running away from this. There was no running away from how he couldn’t stop staring at Lan Xichen who almost glided over the boardwalks as he proceeded towards him, his smile firmly in place.

Jiang Cheng initially, naively (stupidly), thought it was Lan Xichen’s levitating way of walking that he noticed. Did the man ever walk? or was he just gliding everywhere? But his eyes, the traitors that they were, focused on skin, jaw, lips, and their soft upward turn every time Lan Xichen saw him in the morning. The curves they made around words as he greeted Jiang Cheng in the morning, multiple times now, since Jiang Cheng was preoccupied with gawking at Lan Xichen's lips until he felt warmth from an extended white-covered arm over his own purple robes. “Are you okay A-Cheng?” Lan Xichen asked, concerned, and Jiang noticed his smile falter as he stuttered to respond “I.. yes..yes... I am fine” he blabbed, (bring the smile back! his brain pleaded).

“I am totally fine! Sect Leader Lan” he asserted, nodding or trying to (Bob your fucking neck, he needs to smile again, his brain screamed at him). Lan Xichen finally smiled or almost grimaced. “Perhaps we shouldn’t go today?” the Lan Sect Leader almost questioned? Stated? Jiang Cheng could never really say. His stupid brain kept focusing on how Lan Xichen had taken his arm away, his body was also turned away from him and facing the grounds. Jiang Cheng’s heart sank. Xichen doesn’t want to practice today? Is Xichen unwell, is he bored? is he tired? Oh my god, does he hate me? Is he leaving? His brain was having an internal berating contest leaving him lost to the fact that he had not spoken for over two minutes

“A-Cheng”

Jiang Cheng startled at the sweet yet concerned voice of Lan Xichen. “Yes! Sect Leader..” he hurriedly answered. “Please, A-Cheng, I believe we are close enough for you to not require this much formality” Lan Xichen stated, softly, and Jiang Cheng couldn’t help but find hope in the slight edge of pain he could detect. Besides the fact that the man actually interrupted Jiang Cheng? Neglecting a sect rule of never interrupting anyone? Wow! Silencing his overtly hopeful brain, and his own ability to grab at the tiniest things the alluring man uttered he once again stuttered, “Of... Of course... Lan Huan ” he affirmed, sweat forming on his palms, as his voice slightly quivered. However,  Lan Xichen smiled, beamed almost, and Jiang Cheng felt his core, and his knees weaken at the unbelievable warmth he felt. "Is it hot?” he stammered, yet again (kill yourself, his brain supplied. Hot? in winter? You are hopeless Jiang Cheng)

“A-cheng!” Lan Xichen chuckled

“What exactly are you made of!” he almost exclaimed, his demeanor unexpectedly amused

“It is about to snow again…” he added, eyes sweeping through the already snow-filled grounds “which is why I said we should perhaps not practice today”

He turned to look at Jiang Cheng, a soft smile still in place and Jiang Cheng could feel his neck and body sweat, with his palms already in tight fists. He swallowed hard and looked away, attempting to get a semblance of the composure he required to deal with the beauty that radiated all around Lan Xichen, his soft words, his kinder eyes, his impossibly lithe gait, his flawless Jade like skin (get the fuck back on track his brain pleaded and yelled at the same time)

“Never took the Lans to be afraid of snow” He managed to scoff, with a small smirk. (You couldn’t be farther away from the track you fool! He will hate you, what is wrong with you, why would you provoke him)

“Wanyin!” Lan Xichen exclaimed, and Jiang Cheng sighed with relief internally, while also wanting to melt into the ground or violently, lovingly, and gently meet the curvature of the lips that uttered his given name oh so beautifully, with his own. (Maybe bite too? oh well, his brain at least agreed on something)

“Alright then” Lan XIchen affirmed

“We shall spar” he looked at Jiang Cheng again, eyes holding a glint of dangerousness.

(Run, his brain panicked, run Jiang Cheng)

Completely ignoring the warning, Jiang Cheng wondered—how does he do it; how does a proper, gentle, levitating grace of a man like Lan Xichen hold so much mirth and mischievousness?

His instincts finally had to take over, knowing that Jiang Cheng left to his own devices had no plans but to silently and internally drool. As though on autopilot he mounted Sandu, flying toward the middle of the grounds before he actually violently, gently but ever so lovingly would kiss the everloving life out of Lan Xichen.

Jiang Cheng liked familiarity. He, much like his personality, disliked surprises, or change. he was used to the humid, warm climate of Lotus Pier. He was immensely deft in navigating waters and loved the serenity that came from the silence down below. But having reached the grounds, he couldn’t help but look up. Snow was a beautiful, delicate thing. Something he’d not experienced firsthand or rather had the chance to observe firsthand. As delicate flakes gently fell around him, he captured one in his hand only for it to melt away. Lan Xichen, let him be, while he took the liberty to watch. Snow still had that mesmerizing effect on him. The utter magnificence of it still enraptured him, making him smile without effort. And now, as he saw Jiang Cheng, in sharp purple, enveloped in the lightest onslaught of snowfall he felt himself choke at the beautifully striking contrast it made. He felt blessed to witness the calm serenity that had captured Jiang Cheng’s face, something as unique as snowflakes themselves.

“A-Cheng!” he called, gentler than usual and Jiang Cheng turned around, beaming. Lan Xichen couldn’t help but reach out and swipe at a flake that delicately landed on Jiang Cheng’s cheek. Jiang Cheng froze. Amidst almost opening his arms to catch snowflakes, he froze and Lan Xichen froze with him - just because he could. Just because finally he could feel the thrumming warm skin that flushed red every time Jiang Cheng saw him.

“Beautiful” Lan Xichen whispered, unable to stop himself. Not wanting to really.

“Do you just want to enjoy the snow A-Cheng?” Lan Xichen asked, with the tenderness one extends to a child. Jiang Cheng could swoon, would swoon, but he was a Jiang. His pride, stood strong in his core and his unsheathed Sandu answered for Lan Xichen.

“Very well” Lan Xichen smirked, and their sword glares clashed.

The snow fell in soft blankets, unhindered by the clash of two equally powerful men brandishing swords.

However, before they realized the snow began matching the ferocity and boldness of their strikes on one another. Jiang Cheng, as unfamiliar as he was, didn’t expect that despite his strong core, snow could feel so debilitatingly cold. One powerful blow from Lan Xichen had him back against a tree, and he couldn’t escape a chatter of his teeth. He shut his eyes, attempting to collect himself, from the cold chilling his spine and the gasp threatening to leave him at the intense proximity between him and Lan Xichen

“A-Cheng” Lan XIchen pulled away “You are cold” he stated, concern dripping from his voice.

“I’m fi..nee” he stuttered, but his shivering breath deceived him and Lan Xichen took resolve,

“We are going back” he informed taking Jiang Cheng by hand and leading him to the Hanshi.

And Jiang Cheng would forever blame the cold for his inaction at letting himself be almost carried away by Xichen to what Jiang Cheng knew was his private room.

Lan Xichen was a man that exuded calm and tranquility. In the midst of the harshest things he experienced in life, he’d maintained his grace and impenetrable composure. However, with that resolve came an immense amount of self-sacrifice. He had very few instances in life where he’d allowed himself to truly take, to truly and uninhibitedly pursue what his heart wanted. But as he took Jiang Cheng by the hand, the usual voices in his head chiding him about rules, and impossibilities and wrongdoings had silenced themselves.

Holding the smaller, usually warmer, now ice cold and almost trembly hands in his own, all he wanted to do, all he could think of, was how he ached to interlace their fingers. How he could warm them up so the occasional chatter that escaped the most beautiful wide pair of lips would stop. How he could impart his much warmer breath to Jiang Cheng so he would be a little fireball once again. Reaching the Hanshi he immediately escorted Jiang Cheng to the table in the centre of the room. He unwillingly let go of Jiang Cheng’s palm, placing it softly against the table, and went about activating the fire talismans. His hearth was lit up and he turned around to see Jiang Cheng with arms around himself. Lan Xichen all but wanted to coo at Jiang Cheng’s attempts to appear like the cold didn’t bother him. He went over to the table once again and let the pot brew for their tea before he fetched a large dry robe of white for Jiang Cheng to change into. He smiled, as he handed him the considerably longer garment.

“A-Cheng, you must change, you will feel better”

Jiang Cheng looked up, swallowing

“I.. I’ll be fine Lan Huan” he whispered, clamping his lips tight, to stop an involuntary chatter.

“I understand, I can  pass you spiritual energy instead..”

“I’ll change!” Jiang Cheng yelped, conceding. His voice was loud and hurried to which Lan Xichen smiled wide. “Good” he nodded, placing palms on his folded knees, and sitting upright.

Jiang Cheng very ungracefully rose to head towards the screen behind which he would have to change, with Lan Xichen 10 feet away. His ears were ringing from how loud his own heartbeats were.

Walking or rather gliding into the Hanshi with Lan Xichen’s firm grip had been shocking enough but changing in front of him? He wanted to die. However, “What.. what about you?” Jiang Cheng turned, momentarily remembering and finally seeing that Lan Xichen was wet himself. His usually spotless white robes were dotted with patches of the slightest grey from the snow that had since become water. He couldn’t help but linger his gaze specifically on the bright spot of the otherwise baby blue forehead ribbon. Lan Xichen of course smiled, and answered “ After you, A-Cheng” and waved towards the bamboo screen for Jiang Cheng to go behind.

Once behind the screen he made quick work of shedding his purple robes and unfurled the impeccably folded white ones. He could briefly smell a hint of sandalwood, lavender, and pine. His heart fluttered as he stopped himself from taking a deep breath of the scent characteristic of Lan XIchen. After what felt like an eternity, he dragged himself from behind the screen, the robes being longer than his own, he couldn’t help the unsure strides as opposed to his usual strong and firm ones. He avoided meeting Lan XIchen’s gaze which he was certain held an amused glint. However, he looked up, seeing Lan Xichen arise, to walk behind the screen himself.

Jiang Cheng realized, in his attempt to not crane his neck and peek behind the screen, that his teeth were not chattering anymore, and while he was initially embarrassed at how Lan Xichen’s robe sleeves were way past his palms, they were doing a more than excellent job of warming him up along with the steady heat that was being exuded from the hearth. Before he could revel in his comfort, Lan Xichen walked out from behind the screen, gracefully sitting across the table and diligently pouring perfectly steeped tea into two cups “Here” he gestured smoothly, almost noiselessly placing the most exquisite china cup in front of Jiang Cheng.

“This will make you warmer,” Xichen said, softly smiling, his face uninhibitedly happy at seeing Jiang Cheng in his own robes, almost drowning in them as he looked beyond adorable.

Lan XIchen lifted his own cup and waited, as Jiang Cheng just stared at him, his arms still unmoving towards the cup

“A-Cheng?”

“Yes.. yes” Jiang Cheng startled

“Your tea” Lan Xichen nodded towards the steaming cup once again.

“Is it not to your taste?”

“No..no... I mean, it is, yes” came Jiang Cheng’s confusing response as he immediately took out his arms from below the table.

Lan Xichen couldn’t help the amusement he felt at the revelation. Jiang Cheng couldn’t let his arms out the sleeves without rolling up the long, long ones of the white flowy robes, and therefore contemplating as to how he could lift his cup, without revealing their obvious difference in stature.

“My dear A-Cheng” Lan Xichen chuckled, face helplessly warm at the sight of a Jiang Cheng that looked like a Bao with a head

“Don’t laugh” Jiang Cheng retorted, attempting annoyance and unable to stop the pout on his face.

“Let me help you” Xichen offered, easily rising from his place across the table to sit right beside Jiang Cheng.

“no... I  Lan Huan” Jiang Cheng panicked.

“Here you go” Lan Xichen ignored his flimsy, stuttering protest to hold the warm cup before Jiang Cheng’s lips.

He would have screamed—no—ran away but the hopeful warm look in Lan Xichen’s eyes had him captured and he involuntarily moved forward to take a sip.

“Good” Lan Xichen affirmed, satisfied smile in place as  his arms made no attempt to move away, steadily holding the cup for Jiang Cheng to drink from, again

“You should drink yours Sect.. “

“I mean Lan Huan” he corrected himself, hurriedly, when Xichen raised an eyebrow at his repeated mistake.

“I shall, you first” Lan Xichen stated easily, leaving no room for Jiang Cheng to argue.

With his heart in his throat, Jiang Cheng watched Xichen’s soft gaze and complied, finally finishing his tea. He felt immensely warm, inside and out, and took the moment to unabashedly stare at Lan Xichen who was now sipping at his own tea, throat bobbing with every sip.

His own mouth felt dry, and he couldn’t wait to leave. To whimper in his own misery at his unyielding affections towards a man so pure, so openly kind. One he wanted to grab by the collars and kiss until he was breathless. He wanted. Wanted to touch the pale neck, feel the liquid pass down his throat, feel the thrum of a racing heart much like his own, as he kissed and nipped and left marks, that he hoped would bloom pink and then turn purple. How beautiful would Lan Huan look marked so deeply by him? He couldn’t stop his brain which had succumbed to his wanting.

“I should probably... um go Lan Huan” he swallowed, unwillingly. Not wanting to corrupt the man with his further burning thoughts of impurity.

Lan Xichen placed his cup gently on the table and turned to face Jiang Cheng.

“Must you? A-Cheng?” he looked distraught, hurt even, and Jiang Cheng felt his heart clench.

“No.. no I, “

“Let’s move closer to the hearth, you seem to be cold still,” Lan Xichen said, softly rubbing his palm against Jiang Cheng’s arms who’d involuntarily trembled at the hurt look Xichen had given him. He could never, as long as he lived, be able to deny this man, he realized.

Succumbing, He nodded and they moved closer, both now sitting close enough for their thighs to touch and Jiang Cheng let out a long sigh.

“I didn’t know... snow was so..” He paused

“Cold?” Lan Xichen added, warmly

“Well, yes?” Jiang Cheng responded, confused.

“That is not unnatural A-Cheng. One always wonders how something so beautiful, so soft and delicate can feel so different from its appearance” Lan XIchen responded, his face almost glowing against the fire, expression serene, and Jiang Cheng couldn’t help but think, like you.

In all the years he’d known Lan XIchen, the man had been the very embodiment of snow. Beautifully delicate, and gentle, but also an unyielding icy storm if the need arose.

Jiang Cheng stirred, he’d fallen asleep? yes. Where though, and what was this soft thing his head is rested on? He groaned softly, eyes unwilling to open just yet, and sighed. He felt a soft touch, on his forehead, the unmistakable touch of fingers, skimming through his hair. Someone was petting him, whilst he was asleep on their lap. Something he had experienced only when he was tiny, cradled safely on his Shijie’s lap, as she pet his hair until he fell asleep. Such unbridled affection was shown to him only until he was grown enough to barely form memories, and with that, he couldn’t help but groan softly.

“Wanyin” a voice, a  deeper one, that could no way be his Shijie’s, whispered above him.

His body went rigid, but the hands, the soft fingers did not move away from his forehead.

He opened his eyes and saw. The fire had burned to soft soothing embers and was lighting the face of the man he was cradled upon.

His heart stopped, as he saw Lan Xichen smile down at him, his face almost sparkling with the warmth his eyes held. All directed at him, towards him.

He didn’t raise, but his arm did. He let it move up and touch. A palm reaching to cup the face of the man he had wanted to touch for so long.

“Lan Huan”

“Wanyin” Lan Xichen breathed, eyes closing involuntarily, and sighing as he leaned into the touch like he welcomed it, wanted it.

He let his thumb graze sharp cheekbones, fingers gently wrapping around the most beautiful neck he had ever seen in his existence.

“I... I fell asleep on you?” he asked, his voice low and scratchy from sleep. From one of the most contentful rest, he’d had in ages.

“You did, Wanyin. I didn’t want you to strain your neck” Lan XIchen responded, making no motion to take away his fingers that steadily were still skimming through his hair, now open in a dark blanket spread around Lan Xichen’s lap, and the mat they were both seated on.

He made himself rise, and Lan Xichen caught the wrist that dared move away from his face. Jiang Cheng was half arisen, using one arm to prop himself up. “Wanyin” Lan Xichen swallowed, looking vulnerable, and nervous

“I...

“Xichen-Ge “  Jiang Cheng whispered shakily, the way he has wanted to for so long. Using the honorific the way he had tested on his tongue and in his head for so long.

Lan Xichen gasped, eyes locked on Jiang Cheng. Lips parted, Jiang Cheng could see him not exhaling. Now or never, his brain supplied, for the first time, helpful.

“I like you... “ Jiang Cheng breathed. He couldn’t bear the idea of Lan XIchen being nervous, or uncomfortable, or anything but blissful, and in that vein he confessed, forcing himself to look, and feeling like he could melt as Lan Xichen smiled and pulled him by the neck to press their foreheads.

“Wanyin…” he breathed, against wide lips and paused.

“Wanyin” he repeated, like he could do this all day.

“Yes Huan-Ge, I” and he felt a flutter of breath before the press of a soft pair of lips.

Jiang Cheng’s heart sang, pulled taut like the notes of the Xiao that Lan Xichen so beautifully played. He felt like he could breathe.

“Ge..” he whimpered openly, almost begging, his eyes crossing from the effort to not look at Lan Xichens lips.

Lan Xichen crossed their distance once again, letting his soft press, turn to a demanding pull, and when Jiang Cheng gasped once more he dove in.

Letting his tongue in to taste, and feel warmth, so much warmth he couldn’t stop. Whimpers leaving his lips, body shivering, he clutched Jiang Cheng closer than he had any human in his entire life, and Jiang Cheng rewarded him with a groan punctuated with “Huan-Ge” Lan Xichen could die happily, he knew. Using tongue and lips together to feel the heat of the mouth he has wanted to devour for so long.

Now that they let the dams break, they kissed and kissed and devoured. Jiang Cheng found himself being lifted, let himself be lifted (fucking Lan's arm strength), and placed on top of a wider frame that enveloped him, let his arms wrap firmly around a slender jade neck, let his hair fall all around them as he moaned and whimpered for Xichen who made him keen and groan openly for more.

More sounds, more gasps, more calls of Ge from his beloved Jiang Cheng who not only returned his feelings but was also eager, and enthusiastic, openly expressive of the effect Lan Xichen, and his wandering arms and lips had on the other man. They kissed until it almost hurt, making them pause. Resting foreheads against one another, neither wanted to pull away. Finally, they opened their eyes to see, and couldn’t help but smile at each other.

“Oh..” Jiang Cheng couldn’t help the small exclamation of surprise. “Ge.. don’t cry” he choked, cupping Lan Xichens face firmly in his own, and urgently swiped at the tears that spilled, while Lan Huan kept smiling.

“You return my feelings” Xichen whispered against his lips, pressing them together mid-sentence.

Jiang Cheng stuttered “What.. what, of course!” he responded, voice dripping with disbelief.

“Have you? Have you seen yourself? Have you? how can you ever doubt.. mmmph”

Jiang Cheng was once again cut off, as Lan XIchen kissed him hard, more urgently, almost feverishly. Demandingly prying open the wide beautiful lips that felt like a drug to him. A drug he could freely partake in, now.

But Jiang Cheng pushed back, “No! No! A-Huan wait!” and Lan Xichen immediately pulled back

“You.. you have to know” he clutched at his love’s waist using his other palm to stroke soothingly against Lan XIchens cheek.

“You are unrealistically, unimaginably wonderful. I...I will never know why you like me."

“My love.. how”

"No, don’t interrupt!” Jiang Cheng chided, but his tone is one of loving urgency that Lan Xichen can do nothing but chuckle at, entwining their fingers like he’s wanted to for months now.

“you are ethereal my A-Huan, and no one, and I mean no one, not even you, gets to treat yourself like anything less” he finished, eyes wide and voice hoarse but sincere.

The snow had long since stopped falling and brought with it a chilling cold.

“Yes.. my love” Lan Xichen nodded fervently, turning his face to kiss the palm holding his jaw, reciprocated by a helpless gasp.

“Ge... I.. “

“I love you, Wanyin” Xichen countered to Jiang Cheng’s initial confession

“I... I love A-Huan” Jiang Cheng manages before letting himself fall into the tightest embrace of his life, burying his face against Xichen’s neck, which smells like the sandalwood, lavender, and pine on his clothes, breathing deep and filling his being with what felt like a warmth he’d experienced for the first time, amidst heavily falling snow.