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Jonny was minding his own business, trying (and failing) to play a fiddle he stole from someone, when suddenly there was another person with him. They had red skin, hooves, and goat horns. They also seemed to be giving off a bit of smoke.
“I’m gonna make this quick, boy. I see ya play the fiddle, and so do I. Whatcha say about making’ a little deal with me? If I play the fiddle better’n you, I get your soul. If you play better’n me, I’ll give you a brand new fiddle.” They said to him.
Jonny huffed. “I’m not stupid. My soul’s worth a bit more than just a new fiddle.”
The Devil raised an eyebrow. “Ya want a gold fiddle?”
“That’ll do.” Jonny said instantly. “I’ve gotta go do somethin’ for my ma, but I’ll be back in an hour to play better’n you.”
The Devil started to say something, probably about how they were in a hurry, but Jonny, despite his height, was fast, and wasn’t listening anyways. They sighed, and sat back down to rosin their bow as they waited to fiddle.
Now Jonny didn’t know how to play the fiddle. He played harmonica, and that was it. But he did know someone who could play the fiddle.
Stasya Romanova lived on the outskirts of New Texas, and played the fiddle better than anyone else Jonny (or any other New Texan) knew. Even on the hottest days, she was seen wearing a heavy wool coat. She wasn’t the most social of people, but she seemed to like Jonny. At least, she didn’t seem to mind when he came around to her house to steal her curtains. (It wasn’t his fault she had good taste in patterns. She never stopped him anyways.) Sometimes he sat and sewed with her while she looked through scanners and government things that looked illegal to be on. Said she was looking for her girlfriend. Jonny hoped she found her.
There were a few rumours going around that she’d shot someone for getting in her space too much, but Jonny was too smart to indulge those rumours. He knew that Stasya would definitely shoot someone who got in her space. And who wasn’t him.
“Stasya!” He yelled, pushing himself off her floor once he was through the window.
Stasya, who, as it turned out, was sitting in the chair right next to him, looked up from her book to glare at him. “What do you want now, Jonny?”
“I need ya to play the fiddle for me.” Jonny said as he pulled her newest curtains off the rack. “See, I made a deal with the Devil where if I play the fiddle better’n them, then they’ll give me a fiddle made a gold, an’ if they play better’n me, they get my soul.”
She got up and helped him get the other curtain down without damaging the window using her far superior height. “Aren’t you the one who’s supposed to play then? И почему ты продаешь свою душу?”
“No idea what that other thing was, but Jack’s told me stories about the Devil makin’ deals with other people. He said that Frank from the bar was doing a deal, and the Devil missaw Mary’s sister Joanne as Frank. They can’t see shit! If you play instead a’ me, they won’t know, and I get ta tell everyone about how I tricked the Devil!” Stasya stepped back, away from the now vibrating child.
“Pleeeeaaaase, Stasya? Do it for your favourite ‘horrible gremlin child’?”
“Alright, Jonny. But if they can tell I am not you, it is still your soul they get.” Picking up both her own fiddle and Jonny before he could jump back out her window, she walked off to kick the Devil’s ass with a stringed instrument.
After an hour of waiting for the child to get back, the Devil was very bored. They hadn’t expected to have to wait so long to get a soul, and they had an appointment with an eye doctor in about half an hour. They hadn’t meant to put it off so long, but they’d had to do a lot of paperwork in the last few millennia, so their vision had gone faster than their secretary had when her vacation rolled around.
They were so caught up in their thoughts about their secretary and terrible vision that they didn’t notice when Stasya sat down across from them with Jonny hiding behind her.
“I’m back, Devil!” He shouted, more evil in his grin than the Devil could summon in a thousand years.
“AGH!” Valiantly pretending that they hadn’t fallen off their log perch, they pulled out their fiddle. “I’ll go first then.”
Jonny snickered, and Stasya shoved him.
The Devil did alright. Most of their performance was the band of smaller demons that had joined in, but it was alright.
Nastya Rasputina was better than alright, though.
“You done alright there, Devil, but I’m the best there’s ever been!” Jonny cackled.
Obviously Stasya won. It was hardly a competition, and the Devil barely stuck around long enough to drop the golden fiddle at her feet before rushing off to their eye appointment, grumbling about “Stupid kids and their stupid fiddle skills. I’ll show you the ‘Best there ever was.’ Stupid kids, can’t even get a good soul these-‘“
Stasya smiled as Jonny, the raccoon that he was, snatched up the fiddle and jumped around. Then he spun around to her and held it up.
“Here ya go, Stasya. I just wanted the bragging rights. Not like I can play it anyways.” He mumbled, pretending he didn’t like and respect her. (She knew better.)
She took the fiddle and patted Jonny on the head. He tried to bite her.
Eventually, she found some trace of her girlfriend, and rushed off to the stars, leaving Jonny with her stash of spare curtains.
Eventually Jonny met a doctor who gave him immortality.
Eventually he met Stasya again, and regained his sister for the first time. (He didn’t tell her about Stasya in New Texas.)
He assumed she’d have/had that particular adventure on her own, and never worried about it. Never mind the various holes in that explanation. Jonny never thought about it much, since it wasn’t like she was ever going anywhere.
And then she did, and he tried not to think about her at all.
(Eventually, she found her girlfriend.)