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Kaori waited in front of her apartment building for her best friend. The former kage had said that she wanted to go shopping but hadn’t explained why. So Kaori stood, people watching, until Mei came strolling up. They fell into an easy pace, heading for the main street of shops.
“So what is this all about?” Kaori asked as they entered the busy district.
Mei had a determined look on her face. “We’re buying Kakashi some new clothes.”
Kaori blinked. She thought back to the last time she’d seen the man she considered to be a brother-in-law. His clothes didn’t seem particularly distasteful. They were kind of boring and similar to what a lot of other Leaf jonin wore but that was not uncommon. “Um…why?”
Mei threw her hands in the air. “Because everything the man owns is either black or blue!”
Kaori eyed Mei’s blue dress critically, then her own green attire. “Your point? It’s not unusual to pick a color you like and stick to it.”
Mei sighed, exasperated. “I know but he literally wears nothing else. I asked him what other colors he owned and he just stared at me!”
Kaori blinked, still not seeing the problem, but proceeded on. “Well I guess we’ll just have to find him something, that’s all.”
Mei nodded and stormed into a shop. She bypassed the friendly clerk and started flipping through shirts on a rack. Kaori greeted the clerk politely and his smile widened. Meanwhile Mei was shifting any blue and black shirts aside in disgust.
“Blue, blue, why is everything blue?!” Mei fumed.
“We live in the Land of Water,” Kaori deadpanned. “People like blue.”
“Well I’m sick of blue,” Mei muttered. “Let’s try somewhere else.” She whirled and stomped out of the shop. The storekeeper watched her with raised eyebrows. Kaori shrugged and mouthed an apology as she followed Mei out.
After walking down the street for several seconds Mei said, “let’s go in here.”
Kaori looked up at the shop Mei had indicated and flinched. The outer wall was painted a bright orange and the loud yellow and green sign read, “Colorful Clothes for the Kool Shinobi”. Kaori’s mouth threatened to hang open of its own accord. She knew she’d seen the shop before but had immediately tried to block the experience from her memory. “This store has more orange than the Leaf’s Orange Hokage.”
“It’s perfect,” Mei said, ignoring her friend. She grasped Kaori’s hand and yanked her inside.
“Yo,” the clerk said, leering at the women as they entered.
Kaori raised a single eyebrow and a frown settled onto her face. Mei, however, turned to her blonde friend. “See? They even talk like him!”
Kaori’s jaw dropped. She pulled Mei aside. “What’s wrong with you today?”
Mei looked at her friend. “What do you mean?”
Kaori waved her hands dramatically at the flashy posters, obnoxious clothing, and creepy clerk who was waving at them. “What are we doing in this shop?! Why do you suddenly think you need to buy Kakashi a new outfit? And in what universe does that clerk’s speech pattern even remotely resemble the Sixth Hokage’s?!”
Mei blinked and looked at the clerk who was now posing for them behind a counter. “Okay, you’re right, it isn’t remotely the same. But, I’d just like to see Kakashi wearing something different for once. He wasn’t lying; the only clothes in his wardrobe are blue, dark blue, or black. There was a green spandex suit lying on the bottom in a corner but I assume that was a gift from Guy and it has remained there ever since.” Mei took a breath and calmed herself. “Kakashi said the other day that I looked beautiful in different colors. It got me thinking that I’d like to see him in some too.”
Kaori smiled. This was sweet, in a way, and Mei was practically glowing. She caved. “Okay Mei, let’s get your husband some clothes.”
They started pawing through the merchandise, ignoring the clerk when he tried to loop them into a conversation with pickup lines. “How about this one?” Mei held up a shirt.
Kaori raised an eyebrow. “Well, he does like eggplant so…”
“It’s not eggplant it’s purple!” Mei protested.
Kaori shrugged, “what’s the difference?”
“Eggplant is more like plum.”
Kaori looked at the shirt again. “It’s a plum shirt.”
“Purple,” Mei insisted. She shook the hanger, making the shirt wave like a flag.
“Mei, I can see the tag from here.”
Mei turned the shirt to face her. “Plum,” she read aloud.
“Um-hm,” Kaori murmured, satisfied. She flipped another shirt aside on the rack.
Mei put the shirt back quickly.
“How about this?” Kaori said holding up a shirt in her own favorite color.
“Green? He’ll say he’d look too much like Guy.”
Kaori considered the kelly green color. She shrugged, “good point.”
The hunt continued.
“He could look cute in orange,” Kaori commented holding up another shirt. It was cut in the same style as the blue and black shirts he wore already, just in a muted orange.
Mei frowned thoughtfully, “yes, but then he’d look too much like Naruto.”
Kaori nodded sensibly and returned the shirt to the rack.
“Red?”
“He’ll look like a target.”
“Grey?”
“He already has that color.”
Kaori batted her eyes in confusion. “I thought you said he only had black or blue?”
“His really old black shirts are grey now.”
“Oh.”
“Yellow?”
“Too light to go with his hair.”
“Indigo?”
“Too close to blue.”
“Stripes?”
Mei just raised an eyebrow in response.
Kaori held her hands up. “I don’t know what you want me to do here! We’ve been through the rainbow and then some.”
Mei looked around the store at literally every color she could imagine. However, she couldn’t imagine Kakashi wearing any of it. With a feeling like the sun coming over the horizon and casting light on new thoughts, she looked at her friend. “This was a mistake.”
“What?”
Mei grabbed her friend and pulled her back out of the store. The clerk waved at them hopefully but they didn’t look back at his toothy grin.
“What was a mistake?” Kaori asked as they made their way out of the shopping district.
Mei shook her head. “Kakashi wears blue and black because blue and black works well for him. If he wants to change things up then it’ll be up to him.”
“So, another pointless shopping trip behind us?” Kaori said hopefully.
“Not all shopping is pointless,” Mei said. “We learned a great lesson here today.”
“What’s that?” Kaori asked with a smile.
“Leave your husband’s clothes alone.” Suddenly Mei stopped dead in the street.
Kaori frowned. She’d almost gotten away scot-free. What insane plan was her friend dreaming up now?
“We forgot pink,” Mei stated solemnly. Mei made to grab Kaori and drag her back to the shops.
Kaori pulled away from her friend’s outstretched hands. “What happened to the lesson? The great life lesson we learned!”
“Don’t be ridiculous, Kakashi needs our help,” Mei shouted as she yanked Kaori down the street.
00000
“Um,” Kakashi said. He was holding a hot pink shirt with a ruffled collar and puffed sleeves. “Thank you Mei.”
Mei was bouncing with joy, a huge grin on her face. “Now you couldn’t wear it on missions obviously but it’s fine for around the villages.”
Kakashi opened his mouth, closed it, and opened it again. “I don’t know what to say.”
Mei’s smile fell from its previous height. “You don’t like it. Kaori thought it was too loud.”
“Oh, she’s right about that,” Kakashi said. He quickly added, “but I still love it.” He smiled and Mei’s smile grew. “I’ll put it on right now.”
Kakashi slipped off his black long-sleeved shirt and put the pink monstrosity on over his black undershirt. The v-neckline of the new garment dipped low, revealing the black material beneath. Kakashi eyed the bright color with more than a little concern.
Mei clapped her hands in glee. Kakashi raised an eyebrow, “are you sure you’re alright?”
“I’m fine,” Mei said waving a hand. “Just happy.” After a pause she exclaimed, “let’s go out on a walk!”
Something inside of Kakashi’s chest clenched. The ruffles on the shirt tickled his neck and made him want to cringe. He imagined the stares and laughter, but then he imagined Mei’s smile. He closed his eyes in a moment of meditation and then opened them again. His back straightened. “Okay,” he said as nonchalantly as he could manage.
They stepped out of Kakashi’s apartment building, hand in hand. The stares and double-takes began almost immediately with two civilians sitting on a stoop across the street. Kakashi ignored this as he used to ignore his friends inviting him to eat with them. There was a giggle from somewhere behind them as they progressed down the street. Kakashi didn’t waver. His eyes were on the road in front of him and his wife. A genin squad and their sensei walked by. The students pointed and whispered. The sensei visually followed his genins’ outstretched fingers. He stopped dead, quickly averted his eyes, grasped his students by the collars, and hurried them on.
All this Kakashi ignored, but Mei did not. She blinked in confusion at the snickers and hecklers about them. She put her hand to her hair and surreptitiously glanced down at her own outfit. Then she glanced at her stone-faced husband. Her eyes traveled down to the pink ruffles and stopped, considering. “You know Kakashi,” Mei began, “that shirt makes you look kind of silly.” A giggle escaped Mei as a disbelieving side-glance was shot at her. She looked around. “I thought it’d be dashing but in retrospect,” she trailed off, frowning at herself in confusion.
Kakashi released the tiniest sigh and whispered, “follow my lead.” He raised his hands into a sign and hedged into his student turned successor. The imitation Naruto forced a laugh. “Let’s get out of here Hinata before sensei catches us.”
Oh, right. Mei transformed into Hinata. The disguised couple made their quick, but not too quick, getaway.
Back at Kakashi’s apartment Mei was cackling. “Blaming it on Naruto, that was brilliant!”
Kakashi peeled the pink garment off. He shot Mei an incredulous look. “Did you enjoy yourself?”
This gave Mei pause. She looked at her husband, mouth slightly ajar. “Oh Kakashi I didn’t mean to embarrass you. I really thought it looked good on you. And now,” she trailed off again, a little confused at herself. “How did I think that would look good anywhere?”
With this sentence hanging in the air, Kakashi tossed the garment into the corner of his closet that had thus far been reserved for green jump suits.
The Sixth Hokage shook his head and almost laughed a bit himself. “You know Mei, if I didn’t know any better I’d think you were pregnant.” He walked across the room to close the closet door on the horror within.
Mei blinked, then blinked again. Her eyebrows furrowed and she blinked yet again. Mei couldn’t speak. Her heart had begun to flutter and her mouth wouldn’t work. The silence made Kakashi turn from the closet, glancing at his wife.
“Mei?”
The room was silent as the dawn.
Kakashi crossed the space between them in two quick strides, kneeling in front of her. “Mei?”
Slowly she said, “I have to go see Sakura.” She stood up in a bit of a daze and Kakashi watched her walk out of the apartment, equally stunned. He quickly shook himself and went after her, catching her in the hall.
“Mei, are we pregnant?” There was something expanding inside of Kakashi’s heart, his chest swelling until it felt too full, too good. There was a river of thoughts rushing through his mind and his breathing quickened. All he could see was Mei’s face, feel her hands in his.
Mei looked up at him with a smile and tears in her eyes. She opened her mouth but they said it together, “we need to go see Sakura.”