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Language:
English
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Yuletide 2023
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Published:
2023-11-23
Words:
1,624
Chapters:
1/1
Comments:
19
Kudos:
44
Bookmarks:
4
Hits:
480

Count Four and Pray

Summary:

Alonzo makes a different call.

Notes:

Work Text:

The first time it happens, it’s an accident. Kind of.

Alonzo tells him to get out of the car, head that way, yes, keep walking and for a moment Jake thinks that maybe Alonzo’s changed his mind about keeping Jake on as some sort of morality pet, that any moment now, the rest of Alonzo’s squad’s going to show up and that will be that.

He’s a little drunk, a little high. (When he’s with Alonzo, he’s always a little drunk, a little high.)

And then Alonzo says, “That’s far enough. Stop.”

Jake stops. There’s nothing in front of him: just more alley. He turns around.

“Drop your pants,” Alonzo says. Jake doesn’t, mostly because he’s been expecting something more like get down on your knees, hands on your head and this isn’t that, the way Alonzo is looking at him isn’t like that – but then, Alonzo is a very good liar: Jake knows this. “Now,” Alonzo says.

Jake drops his pants. It’s not – he’s not –

“Good boy,” Alonzo says, crowding Jake up against the dirty wall of the alley, and then his hand is on Jake’s dick, and Jake’s pretty sure he isn’t supposed to think that’s kind of hot: what he should be doing is shove Alonzo away, run like hell and then … what? Report Alonzo to Internal Affairs? ’I didn’t have a problem with my superior officer murdering suspects and stealing stuff, but I draw the line at sexual assault’. Yeah, right.

So he just stands there, and Alonzo gives him a hand job, and it’s weird, because Jake enjoys it, even when he’s pretty sure he shouldn’t, couldn’t: he’s married, for God’s sake, and straight, and Alonzo is Alonzo, and no way no how this isn’t going to come back to bite him in the ass.

 

The second time, it’s another alley. Jake kind of sees it coming this time around.

What he doesn’t see coming is how good it feels to have Alonzo tell him to get on his knees, like that yeah, look at what a good boy you are, which Jake figures Alonzo still isn’t planning on killing him. “You ever suck another guy’s dick, rookie?” Alonzo asks.

Jake has not. Until this moment, it didn’t seem like anything to be embarrassed about. Jake’s pretty sure the country’s full of guys who haven’t ever given another guy a blow job.

“Look at you.” Alonzo chuckles. “Bet you haven’t even gone down on your wife. Missionary position only, huh? Tell me.”

“I don’t - ” Jake says. His wife – his whole life back home, that’s back home. “Please.” He can see how it would be, if Alonzo ever came home with him. Alonzo can be very charming, and very, very crazy.

“You want to suck my dick, rookie? Tell you what, it’ll be time for evaluations soon. You suck my dick real good, and I’ll make sure you get a raise. How’s that?”

“I don’t want a raise,” Jake says. He definitely doesn’t want a raise because he’s sucked his superior officer’s dick.

“But you do want to suck my dick. Don’t you?” Alonzo says. “Practically gagging for it.”

What Jake wants is to never have met Alonzo. That would fix everything currently wrong with his life, he thinks. He would be going to work, doing good. Dreaming of one day maybe getting a chance to make officer, to make a real difference. To serve and protect the community that’s raised him, that he’s belonged to all his life.

Alonzo unzips his pants. “Go on then. Have at it.”

Jake hesitates. He knows how blow jobs work in theory: you put the other guy’s dick in your mouth and suck. Simple. “I’m not - ”

Alonzo pulls out his gun and points it at his head. Jake’s pretty sure the safety is still on, assuming Alonzo didn’t leave it off before he holstered it, which he might have done.

 

The third time, maybe. Jake’s a little more high than usual: Alonzo claims Jake needs to build up some tolerance, needs to be able to keep a clear head when he’s undercover and forced to partake of something or another, and Jake – Jake maybe likes the way it takes the edge off of everything a little too much.

When he’s sober, he can see the way he’s only getting in deeper. The way he’s slipping, even when he’s not going around killing people and stealing things the way Alonzo and the rest of the squad are. Alonzo’s done that much at least: some days, Jake might almost believe he’s a regular, well-behaved cop, making the world a safer place.

Alonzo likes to drive the two of them to the parts of town where people get mugged, likes to walk Jake like a dog, ready to go after any evil-doers. (Alonzo’s word, not Jake’s.)

And it still does feel good, to save people, even with Alonzo behind him, git, boy, watching and observing and only stepping in when Jake is in danger of getting something worse than a bit of roughing up. Alonzo isn’t the worst back up in the world: he’s good at reading people, situations. He scares people in a way Jake knows he never could, because Jake’s not some insane psycho sociopath who also happens to wear a badge that entitles him to wear a gun and shoot people all legal-like.

“You feeling all right?” Alonzo asks. “Looking a little green around the gills.”

Jake wants to be home. He’s got some vacation days saved up, but no idea how Alonzo is going to respond to Jake asking permission to take any. “I’m fine.”

“You don’t look fine.” Alonzo sounds friendly, concerned. “How about you go lie down for a bit? I know a place right around here.”

Do I even have a choice? Of course he doesn’t. Jake already knows how the rest of this conversation is going to play out.

If he drank less, smoked less, maybe he’d be clear-headed enough to handle Alonzo, to stand up to Alonzo. To get Alonzo pissed off enough to make good on his threat to get Jake either fired or shot in the line of duty – and what good’s that going to do anyone?

“Fine,” he says.

“You could say ‘thank you’,” Alonzo says.

 

Jake isn’t entirely surprised when Alonzo tells him to strip. He tells himself it’s fine, it’s no big deal. Better some bedroom than some alley.

Alonzo fucks him slow and sweet, like he genuinely wants things to be good for Jake. Like they’re two people in love, wanting to make each other feel good.

Jake’s glad his wedding band is safe and sound in a pocket of his jacket. It makes the whole thing feel less like cheating – which it isn’t, anyway, because Jake isn’t doing any of this by choice: he’s drunk and high and Alonzo is fucking crazy so.

So if he gets hard at Alonzo whispering what a good boy he’s being, that doesn’t mean anything. If he kisses Alonzo back, if he maybe gets a little aggressive, pushing back against Alonzo, that doesn’t mean anything either. If he comes, if he can’t even remember the last he had an orgasm that felt this intense – that’s just the drugs and the alcohol talking. It’s not Jake. As soon as he figures a way out of this, away from Alonzo, he will put all of this behind him and never look back.

 

The fourth time, it’s a little weird. More weird than usual.

Someone sends Jake a video file on his phone and it’s – well. Jake isn’t even sure why he’s surprised anymore.

“Just a little insurance,” Alonzo tells him, watching his face. “Or, heck, I guess you can call it a souvenir. A nice reminder of our time together.”

“Am I going anywhere?” Jake asks. Part of him hopes Alonzo will say ‘yes’, that Alonzo’s had his fun now, and it’s time for Jake to move on. Part of him knows better.

“Hey, we’re all going somewhere, aren’t we?” Alonzo says. “Like that nice bit of home made porn you’re watching. That could go to all sorts of people.”

Jake says nothing. He’d like to think he’s too high and too drunk to know how to handle this, but maybe it’s time to admit that no matter how sober he gets, he’d still never be able to get the better of Alonzo. It’s not fair and it sure as fuck isn’t right, but it is what it is.

“You know, some of the guys in my squad, they get a little nervous about you,” Alonzo says. “They come and ask me, ‘what’s stopping the rookie from making trouble, eh?’. You don’t take our money, you don’t want to kill people who deserve killing. And that’s fair: I promised you that you wouldn’t have to, and I’m a man of my word. But you can see how it puts me in a bit of a pickle, can’t you? These guys – I’ve got a responsibility to them, Jake. Them and me, we go back a long way.”

“You fuck any of them too?” Jake asks, before he can stop himself. Before he can decide whether what he feels is disgust or jealousy. (It’s definitely disgust.)

Alonzo grins at him. “Now, sweetheart, don’t be like that. You know you’re special.”

Jake turns his head to look out the car window. Somebody out there needs rescuing. Somebody out there is selling drugs. Somebody out there is about to get mugged. Somebody out there is planning to rape a schoolgirl.

“Tell you what,” Alonzo says. “Why don’t you let me buy you dinner somewhere later tonight? You pick the place. You can tell your wife you need to work late.”