Archive of Our Own

Breaking the doctor’s stuff was more cathartic than Surge had initially expected. It was probably part of having been built as a knock-off of Sonic. Being reminded of that just made her angrier, but luckily there were still plenty of bots to break.

Her vent session was interrupted by distant shouting. Surge groaned; it was probably Sonic showing up to steal the show, with her luck. She kicked one last egg pawn into a wall, and zipped off to confront her nemesis.

“TANGLE! I keep TELLING you, don’t rush in without warning us!”

Despite the swarm of robots in every direction, two of the Diamond Cutters seemed decidedly more focused on their argument than on the fight. As Lanolin and Tangle debated whether or not the lemur had given her teammates sufficient warning (“I pointed and you nodded!”) Whisper was forced to pick up their slack, shifting her wispon to its hammer configuration because its gun forms simply couldn’t fire fast enough. “Could you two please save this for later…?”

Tangle turned to respond, and promptly fell on her face as a badnik exploded behind her.

Surge squinted at the Diamond Cutters. She hadn’t planned for running into anyone besides Sonic. “...What are you idiots doing here? Where’s Sonic?” 

Tangle bristled, throwing an egg pawn at her. “I’ll have you know the Diamond Cutters don’t need Sonic’s help to trash an Egg Base! And it’s none of your business what we’re doing here, you, you… wisp-napper!” Her words were backed up with a shot from Whisper, who was snarling at Surge. 

Surge just rolled her eyes and focused on smashing robots; these people weren’t Sonic, so fighting them was pointless. “Whatever you’re doing, I’ll distract the badniks. I’ve got some aggression to let out.”

Lanolin held a hand out to keep the other two from attacking Surge again. “You…. want to help us?”

Surge groaned. The badniks seemed to be regrouping, so she’d run out of easy targets for her frustration. “No, you moron, I just wanna take advantage of how much these bots want you dead. They’re gonna try and swarm you, and I’m gonna break them all before they reach you.”

Lanolin looked to Whisper. “It’s up to you if we wanna trust her on this; you’re the one she’s hurt.”

The wolf stared at Surge for several seconds, then turned away. “I won’t complain if she gets hurt instead of us.” 

Surge had gotten tired of waiting for their answer, and zipped up to a nearby rooftop. “HEY, DOC! Why’s this place so boring, huh? I thought I could find a CHALLENGE fighting you!”

Whisper pulled Lanolin and Tangle away; they had a job to do, after all, and she didn’t want to waste any more time.

Surge kicked a metallic arm and watched it fall to the street. All that fighting, and she STILL felt restless. Stupid augments, couldn’t she even get tired normally? She was SICK of being angry! She was sick of fighting! Whenever she tried to relax, she started thinking about Sonic, and all the ways she could be trying to kill him; it pissed her off, because those thoughts weren’t really hers. She was programmed to hate him, and every time she wanted to blame something on him, she had to wonder if that was her idea or if it was just another way Starline was forcing her to do his bidding from beyond the grave.

“Can you really blame it all on me? We both know you’re more than capable of ruining your own life without my help.”

She spun around, snarling when she saw Starline lean against a pile of broken robots, examining his nails. “Honestly, it’s pathetic. You dig yourself deeper and deeper, and blame everyone else when you can’t climb out.” 

Surge stomped forward, but the specter just grinned as she loomed over him. “You… you just won’t leave me the fuck alone, even after you kicked it. What do I have to do to get rid of you?!” She reached out to strangle him, but as her hands went through him, he vanished. “...Smug bastard won’t even die right.”

At Restoration Headquarters, Jewel was nervously flitting back and forth. “Where are they? Do you think they’re okay?” She had been whining to Amy for half an hour now, and it was starting to grate. 

Amy picked up a nearby clipboard, flipping through papers looking for something that might be able to occupy the beetle. “Jewel, they’ll be fine. They’re all perfectly capable of taking care of themselves, and they’re even better when they work together. They probably just needed more time to extract the data than we’d expected.”

As if on cue, a nearby speaker clicked on. “Director Jewel, the Diamond Cutters are back. They say they acquired potentially vital information during their mission.”

Amy turned to Jewel, smiling. “See, I told you-” But Jewel had already left the room, rushing to welcome her friends back.

“Do you think Surge might be turning over a new leaf…?” Tangle swung gently back and forth, hanging by her tail from a light fixture. “I mean, not attacking us was weird enough, but then she offered to help us! While insulting us, sure, but maybe that’s just how she talks?”

Lanolin frowned, seeming lost in thought for a moment before trying to pull Tangle back to the floor. “I don’t know, but if she’s more eager to fight Eggman than she is to fight us, maybe we could plan around that. Now get down here, we’ve got to go talk to Jewel!”

The group kept talking as they walked, mostly about less serious things like what to eat that night, or where Tangle wanted to take them all the next time they got some time off; she was talking about convincing someone to fly them to Angel Island when Jewel crashed into her. “Tangle! You’re late! What happened?”

Whisper helped Tangle stand back up, and answered for her, “We ran into Surge. She was… rude, but not hostile. I’m not sure what to think of it.”

After the Diamond Cutters finished explaining, Jewel stared at them for a few seconds, and started massaging her temples. “...Let me get this straight. Surge… the violent, crass creation of Dr. Starline, whose only goal in life is to kill Sonic… Decided to help you with your mission? Without asking for anything in return?” 

This got a nod from Whisper, but Tangle responded by throwing up her hands. “Right?! Like, what’s going on with her? If she wanted to trick us, she would’ve acted nicer, right? But she didn’t attack us, even when WE kinda sorta attacked HER, and honestly I think she seemed more tired than anything, but she wanted to fight all the robots so I’m not sure about that, and-”

Lanolin put a hand on her shoulder. “Breathe, Tangle. But yes, she helped us. I wouldn’t say she didn’t ask for anything in return, though. She seemed to view having more robots to smash as a reward in and of itself.”

Jewel had called Sonic to join them at this meeting, and Amy had still been in the director’s office when she had returned, so she turned to the heroes to get their opinion. “Sonic, you’re the one who’s interacted with her the most, what do you think?”

Sonic tapped a finger against his chin. “...Last time we fought, when she told me she couldn’t be free… she didn’t look angry, she just looked sad. I don’t think she actually wants to be a bad guy, she just… doesn’t know how to fight the stuff Starline put in her head. And if that’s the case, then it’d be easier for her to do the right thing if I’m not around, right? I think we should give her another chance. Maybe we can help her out, and then she could join the Restoration or something!”

Tangle did a cheerleader jump, while Amy stepped forward and addressed the whole room. “I think, if we want to do this, we should track her down and approach her to offer a truce. Sonic should stay behind, since seeing him will probably ruin things, but I’d like to volunteer to be the one who talks to her.” 

Jewel winced, wringing her hands. “I don’t like the idea of Sonic not being there to handle her if things go wrong… But you’re right that it’d be bad if she spotted him, so maybe he could follow a little ways behind the group, with a wristcomm so you can call him if Surge starts a fight?”

There were a few seconds of silence as everyone considered this, but one by one, everyone present nodded their assent.

“Surge! Are you here? We just wanna talk!”

Surge crouched behind a stone, peering out at the pink hedgehog wandering through the wilderness. Why was she here? How did she know Surge would be here? Were they going to attack her? She shook her head. There was only one way to get answers to those questions. She stepped into the open, putting a hand on her hip and trying to look bored, irritated, anything but nervous. “What, do I have a fanclub now?”

Amy squeaked, spinning around. “Surge! Oh thank Gaia, I was worried you weren’t actually here…” Surge frowned, leaning against the rock she’d been hiding behind. 

“And why did you wanna see me? You’re one of that blue bastard’s pals, aren’t you?” Somewhere in the back of her head, Surge knew she should be nicer, try at least feel out the olive branch she’s being offered. She’s been so alone, aside from Kit, and seeing the way his programming kicked in whenever she so much as suggested she wanted something broke whatever was left of her heart. But being reminded of Sonic, of the one she’d been built to kill, drowned out almost every other thought. It was hard not to attack Amy; she knew that if she did, Sonic would come to help her, and she could try to kill him again. Surge ground her teeth together, muttering under her breath. “I’m stronger than this… I can hold a damn conversation without going berserk when he’s not even here…”

Amy crept closer, bending down to try and meet Surge’s eyes. “Are you okay? You’re shaking…” The hedgehog reached forward to put a hand on her shoulder, but she whipped her head up and stumbled back, growling.

“I’m fine. I don’t need your help. What do you want?” She glanced around; the hedgehog had to have brought backup. She forced herself to breathe. Panicking wouldn’t do any good. 

“...Surge, you don’t seem okay… I came here because I want to try and help you. Starline programmed you to fight us, right? If you try to work with us, maybe we can find a way to help with that!”

Surge stared at her, trembling as her desperation to finally free both herself and Kit warred with her need to kill Sonic.

Starline’s voice filled her ears. “Do you really think they would help someone like you? You’re worthless, a broken weapon. You will never be free.”

Surge screamed, whirling around and sending a wave of lightning out. “GET OUT OF MY HEAD! I’M NOT BROKEN!” She was so tired of his taunts, his constant whispered mockery, she couldn’t take it anymore. “Where is Sonic?! I need to kill him… I need to end it!”

Amy backed up, raising her wristcomm so she could speak into it. “Sonic? Surge is losing control, I need help here!”

She should have been scared of the tenrec, Surge was lashing out wildly and could have hit her, but Amy found herself more worried about Surge’s wellbeing. The poor girl was clearly fighting something in her mind.

When Sonic burst into view at top speed, Amy switched channels. “Jewel! We need a room that can contain Surge, whatever Starline put in her head is too strong for her to beat with willpower alone!”

All Surge heard was the crackling of lighting around her, all she saw was Sonic’s stupid, smug face (was he smug? He looked more grim- No. He was a smug idiot she had to kill.) She bolted towards him, roaring. “YOU! You blue bastard, stand still so I can kill you!” The ground rushing beneath her shifted direction as Sonic’s foot crashed into her side and sent her flying. Damnit, he was still better than her! The pink hedgehog was talking into her wrist, something about containment? Surge didn’t care. She stood back up, and charged forward again.

Sonic danced around Surge, trying to keep her from moving too far without truly hurting her. She was sloppier than last time they fought. “Hey, I’ve been thinking about something you said last time. Mind clarifying why you can’t be free?” He hopped clear over her head to dodge a punch, sighing as she just snarled at him. “Come on, talk to me here Surge! Maybe I’ll even stand still for a punch or two if you tell me what’s wrong!”

Surge paused, squinting at him. He was lying, he had to be. But what if he wasn’t? She couldn’t beat him, she wasn’t good enough, but if he stood still… “I told you last time, it’s in my BRAIN! I can’t stop hating you, I can’t stop wanting to kill you, not until one of us is dead!” She tried for a spin dash, but he’d been ready, and dodged that attack too. “You lying piece of… if you won’t let me kill you, then just end me! Do it! FREE ME!”

Surge collapsed, sobbing. She was a failure. She just couldn’t keep up. “...Please… I just want it to end…” She was so tired. When was the last time she had slept? She’d been too busy smashing robots, trying in vain to exhaust the anger and hatred her programming filled her with. Now, as she collapsed in despair and the adrenaline began to wear off, exhaustion finally came to claim her.

Surge groaned. “Kit, what the hell did I… do last night… Kit?” She rolled out of a bed that was way too comfortable to be hers, stumbling to her feet. Where the hell was she? She tried to open the door of the small, sparsely furnished room she was in, but it was locked. “Fuckers took me prisoner…? I’ll show them…” 

She kicked the door, and promptly fell on the floor, clutching her leg. “Fuck! What’s that thing made out of?!”

She dragged herself back to her feet, glaring at the door, as a speaker she hadn’t noticed crackled to life. “Ah, you’re awake! Sorry, we thought you’d be out a while longer. Someone will be in to talk to you soon!”

Surge glanced around, looking for something she could use to escape, but there was just a bed, a chair, and a table. And an inspirational poster of a flicky hanging onto a branch, but she was trying to ignore that because she felt like it was patronizing her. She settled for flopping onto the bed as hard as she could, pouting. 

Eventually, the door opened. Surge bolted to her feet to take advantage of the opening, but Amy pushed her back in as she entered the room, closing the door with her foot. Surge groaned as she heard the click of the lock. “What do you want, pink? I was getting some quality brooding in.” She leaned against a wall as Amy straightened the bedsheets. 

“Well, Surge, I thought maybe we could talk about helping you! You um… sounded like you were in an awful place, when you were fighting Sonic…”

Surge winced. She’d forgotten all the stuff she said before she passed out, and she really wished she hadn’t remembered it. “Don’t know what you’re talking about. I’m fine.” Her words were somewhat undercut by the way she tried to curl in on herself. “Did you bring me here trying to make me turn over a new leaf? Idiot.”

Amy frowned and put her hands on her hips. “Are you really going to be this stubborn? We want to help you! We want to get rid of the commands Starline put in your head! We aren’t sure how to do that just yet, but if you try to cooperate, it’ll be a lot easier for us to figure out!” 

Surge shrank back, trying and failing to find a good reason to refuse. Amy was right, but… they were supposed to be enemies… She whined, sliding down to the floor. “I can’t… I don’t… Why are you helping me?”

Amy knelt down to take Surge’s hand in her own. “Because you need help, and we might be the only ones who can give it. There doesn’t have to be anything more to it.” 

Surge stared at her for several seconds, and started crying. What was wrong with her lately, she was supposed to be stronger than this! But it was all too overwhelming, too much at once for her to truly process. She shouldn’t trust Amy, but she’d spent so long not trusting anyone besides Kit, and the poor kid was too young for her to make him deal with all her problems.

She wrapped her arms around Amy like the hedgehog was a teddy bear, sobbing into her shoulder. Amy just patted her on the back. “It’s okay… We’re going to help you. It’ll be okay.”

It took several hours for Surge to calm down enough to fully understand what was involved in letting the Restoration help her. She wasn’t ready to put herself completely at their mercy by living in their headquarters, but Amy had offered to let Surge and Kit move into her house, since she had guest rooms. That was… better, but thinking about living with Amy made Surge feel weird. She also had to go get Kit, and tell him they weren’t going to be fighting Sonic anymore (even thinking about it that distantly made something in her scream that she was fucking up, that she needed to hunt him down, but she pushed it down by telling herself it was just for now, just until she could put herself together and improve as a fighter.) Would the little guy be alright with this? Stupid question, he was alright with anything, so long as she was the one suggesting it; that was another reason she had to do this. Kit deserved better than to spend the rest of his life tied to her, unable to become his own person.

Amy shook her gently, pulling her back to reality. “Surge? You… didn’t give me your answer…” Amy was looking at her with the most adorable puppy dog eyes. 

Surge distantly wondered what it meant that she found Amy adorable, but outwardly she just sighed and waved the hedgehog away. “Yeah, sure, I’ll… We’ll move in with you. I gotta go get Kit, and then we’ll meet you right outside this place.” She tried for a confident grin, but didn’t feel like she succeeded. Amy smiled back at her, and led her to the HQ’s main entrance. 

After she said goodbye and zipped off towards Starline’s old base (which she and Kit had actually returned to after he collapsed a large portion of it; she had figured nobody would look for them there, now) she let her thoughts wander back to how she felt about living with Amy. There was something more to it than just nervousness about trusting someone like that, or gratitude for everything Amy was doing for her, she was sure of it. She just didn’t know how to identify what that feeling was. Once again, she cursed Starline for the many things she didn’t know, but should have.

She almost ran face-first into a wall when she actually reached the base, she was so absorbed in her thoughts. She just barely jolted herself to the side at the last moment, but she didn’t slow down. If she slowed down, she might lose her nerve. “KIT! Find a box to put all your stuff in, we’re leaving this dump!”

Kit obeyed without question, and the moment he was done, Surge lifted him onto one shoulder and his box onto the other, and zipped back to Amy; Kit’s only warning was a quick “Hang on tight, Drippy” less than half a second before she started moving. 

Surge was pleasantly surprised to see a pink car waiting outside Restoration HQ. Some part of her had still been afraid this was a trap, and the rest of her had kind of figured she’d end up having to wait while Amy got ready to leave.

Kit frowned. “Ma’am, why are we here? I thought we were moving, but this is… Ma’am, are we joining the Restoration?” His eyes were wide, but Surge didn’t see the anger or fear she had worried would be there; Mostly, he seemed to be… curious? Excited? Okay, so Surge maybe wasn’t the best out there at interpreting facial expressions, but she was pretty sure this one was vaguely positive. 

“We’re moving. Not into this place, but… You know Amy Rose? The pink one? We’re moving in with her. Air conditioning, regular meals, rooms that were actually made for people to live in them… It’ll be a big upgrade.” She set Kit down, and Amy helped them move his things into the trunk.

While they were busy, Kit slipped into the backseat as quickly and quietly as possible, like he was hoping Amy wouldn’t notice he was there. Surge was trying not to stare at Amy as the car started. Maybe if she looked long enough, she’d figure out what this strange feeling was, but staring was weird, right? She was pretty sure it was weird. Starline hadn’t bothered to re-teach her social etiquette, and she wasn’t sure how good her instincts were in this area, but she was about eighty percent sure staring was weird. Amy glanced over at her. “Is something wrong?” Shit, she’d noticed! 

“Nothing! Nothing’s wrong, I’m, uh… admiring your dress?” Seriously? That was the best she could come up with? She didn’t even sound confident saying it! Amy’s dress was pretty though… It was the same dress she always wore, and Surge wondered why she’d never noticed how pretty Amy was in it before. Wait… Something was wrong with that thought.

Amy just smiled. “Thank you! Everyone else is so used to it they never compliment it, so it’s nice to be reassured it still looks good.” 

Surge couldn’t believe nobody complimented Amy. She’d have to fix that. “Well, they’re dumb, because you look great.” She tried to ignore the way her cheeks were starting to burn. What even was that? Shit, now Amy was staring at her. Which was a problem, because Amy was the one driving. 

Kit leaned forward. “Uh… Ma’ams? The road…?”

Amy screeched, the car veering off the road as she panicked. They hadn’t actually been on a collision course with anything, but the realization she’d let herself get distracted staring at Surge made her overreact. The car started to tip over, but tendrils of water smashed through the windows to push it back onto its wheels. “Ma’ams, are you okay?!”

Amy had fallen out of her seat when the car nearly turned vertical, and ended up clinging to Surge, who had a death grip on her own seat. Amy was so close… and she was cute, like this… She wrapped her arms around Amy without thinking. “Why do I… wanna keep you safe…”

Amy looked up at her, blinking, and Surge quickly let go and turned away. “Uh. I mean… We’re safe. Thanks, Kit.” What was she thinking? This girl didn’t need her protection, and she shouldn’t want to offer that to anyone but Kit anyway. She needed to figure out what these feelings were, and fast, before she completely humiliated herself. 

Amy lingered in Surge’s lap for a few seconds, but eventually she had to return to the driver’s seat. “Ugh, I’ll have to remember to get those windows replaced soon…”

The rest of the ride was spent in awkward silence, but at least that kept Amy from getting distracted, Surge supposed. Even when they reached Amy’s house, and had to move Kit’s things into his room, neither of them spoke. Kit fidgeted nervously, looking between the two women as Amy set down the laptop he’d salvaged from Starline’s base. Surge sighed, stretching as she fought back a yawn. “Drippy, why don’t you go get something to eat? It’s been a while since we ate. I’ll stay in here for a bit to talk to Amy about how we’re gonna do things.” 

Once the fox was out of the room, Amy took a deep breath and turned to Surge. “...So… What was that about, back in the car?” 

She seemed nervous. Why was she nervous, Surge was the one who’d said something weird! “I don’t know what you’re talking about, Pink.”

Amy threw head back and groaned. “Surge! You’re the one who sent Kit out so that we could talk! If nothing happened, then why are we having this conversation?” 

Amy was right. Surge had wanted to talk. But even she didn’t really know what she wanted to say; She just knew she didn’t want Amy to think she was weird, or creepy, she wanted… “Fuck, I don’t even know what I want…”

Amy opened her arms for a hug, and Surge leaned into it. “Hey, it’s okay to feel lost. It’s going to take time to readjust to being a person, instead of just a weapon, but I promise it’ll be worth it.”

“...Thanks… Since we ditched Starline, I’ve felt so many things that I just can’t put a name to. Even when I’m having my own thoughts, free of his influence, I can’t tell what they MEAN!” Surge turned to punch the wall, but Amy held her back, and belatedly she realized it was pretty rude to break someone else’s walls. “Sorry. I think I need some more rest, so uh… keep an eye on Kit, would you? I want the kid to be comfortable here.”

Amy’s soft smile made Surge’s heart flutter, but she filed that feeling away for later and made her way to the room Amy had said was hers, collapsing into the bed. She hadn’t been lying about needing rest; she hadn't spent enough time passed out to fully recover.

Amy sat alone in her kitchen, making a list of all the groceries she’d need now that she had two more mouths to feed. It wasn’t enough to distract her from thinking about Surge. 

The tenrec had been acting… strangely. If she didn’t know better, she’d say Surge had a crush on her… She shook her head, cheeks burning. No, that couldn’t be it, her imagination was getting away from her. Surge just wasn’t used to people being kind to her, and was perhaps getting more attached than she should to the first person to help her… Which could manifest as a crush… Amy steadied herself against the table. Would it be okay to reciprocate? Would she just be taking advantage of someone vulnerable? Oh Gaia, why was she even considering this… They hardly even knew each other! But when she saw the protectiveness and compassion buried beneath the role Starline had forced Surge into, she couldn’t help but want to see more of that, to be there for every step of Surge’s journey. And the way Surge held her when they almost crashed… Amy wasn’t ashamed to admit she liked to play the damsel in distress every once in a while, and she liked being held like that quite a lot. She felt surprisingly safe, in Surge’s arms, despite how their past encounters should have made her feel. 

Amy sighed, making another attempt to push it all out of her mind. Anything like that would have to wait until Surge was more comfortable in her own identity and place in the world, and there was no telling how long that would take.

The next few days went smoothly, at least compared to the day they moved in. Kit helped keep the house clean, and fixed anything that broke, while Surge… tried not to feel useless. Half of what Kit fixed was stuff she broke trying to fight a Starline that wasn’t truly there, and she wasn’t exactly contributing much to make up for it, but Amy insisted it was fine. She wanted to go out and smash something, but she was worried that if she left the Restoration would assume she’d given up on this whole arrangement. Still, she was getting those regular meals she’d promised Kit, and the bed was far more comfortable than what Starline had given them, so she couldn’t complain too much. Hell, Amy had even offered to buy her clothes! She’d wondered what was wrong with the clothes she had, but then Amy asked exactly how long she’d been wearing them. Surge didn’t want to answer that.

Eventually, it seemed Amy noticed she wasn’t comfortable, and decided Surge needed something to do. “Why don’t you join the Diamond Cutters? I heard you helped them with one of their missions, and letting out some energy and aggression fighting Eggman might let you actually enjoy the time you spend relaxing!”

Amy had a point. She was getting restless, but if it wasn’t for that this would practically be heaven; she even had her own personal angel looking after her. She was going to ignore that last thought. “Yeah, yeah, I’ll officially join the good guys. You might wanna call ahead and let them know I’ll be stopping by; don’t wanna run into the Blue Bitch and go right back to square one.” Surge ground her teeth. Thinking about him made her blood boil, but it was easier to ignore when she wasn’t desperate and scared, and one of his best friends was helping her out so much. She had feelings of her own on the matter to fight back with.

Amy rolled her eyes as she pulled her phone out. “You could try to be a little nicer when talking about him, at least…” Surge grinned. There wasn’t any real hostility in Amy’s voice. While Amy was on the phone, Surge decided to go ahead and zip over to Restoration HQ.

…She had no idea where the Diamond Cutters actually were, or where that beetle girl who was in charge of this place was. She also didn’t have a phone to call Amy and ask her where they were. The easiest solution would be to run back to the house to ask, but that would be embarrassing, so obviously she couldn’t do that. Instead, she opted to grab the arm of a passerby (who had been trying very hard not to draw attention, but Surge couldn’t care less.) “Hey. Where are the Diamond Cutters? Amy said I should join them.” Maybe saying it was Amy’s idea would make them more cooperative. 

That person didn’t tell her anything except “Please leave me alone.” Neither did the next 5, and she was starting to think she’d HAVE to go back to ask Amy when she spotted the lemur girl she remembered from the Egg Base. “HEY! Uh… whatever your name was! With the big fluffy tail that smashes robots!”

Tangle, who had been hanging upside down in the HQ’s rec room watching a fighting game tournament someone had organized, squealed in excitement and rushed over to Surge. “So you really have joined the good guys! That’s so cool, hi, I’m Tangle!” This was… encouraging. She wanted to join their group so Amy would be happy, so Tangle’s excitement was good news.

“Hey. Surge. Nice to properly meet you. So uh… Amy wanted me to see about joining your group, who do I have to talk to about that?”

Rather than answering, Tangle just grabbed Surge’s arm and dragged her into the hall. “Oh this is gonna be great! With you on our team, Eggman won’t stand a chance!” 

Surge wasn’t sure if Tangle was intentionally trying to flatter her or not, but she had to admit it was working either way. “You’re damn right he won’t! I’ll wreck all his shit, while you girls do all the… planning stuff. What goes into these missions besides smashing robots?” 

Tangle just shrugged at her. “Beats me, I’m kind of bad at the planning. So I’ll just help with the smashing, and Whisper and Lanolin can keep us on course!” Surge liked this girl already.

Tangle rambled on about how amazing her teammates were, and how lost she would be without them, right up until she pulled Surge into the Diamond Cutters’ meeting room. “Hey! Girls! Guess who decided to join us!”

The wolf and sheep had been playing some sort of card game (poker, her mind supplied from who knows where) before they came in. The wolf seemed to be staring at her, but she never actually opened her eyes. Surge couldn’t decide if that was creepy or if it made her look cute. Surge blinked. These thoughts were getting harder to ignore. She still needed to figure out what they meant…

“Are we going to talk about having Surge join the Diamond Cutters, or are you two just going to keep having a staring contest?” The sheep was tapping her fingers against the table impatiently, head resting on her other hand. “I mean, I’m willing to give you a chance. What do you say, Whisper? We’ll only let her in if it’s unanimous.” 

Surge glanced nervously between the sheep and… Whisper, apparently, who was still staring at her. “...She hurt my friends… but then she helped us, at the Egg Base. And she seems… nervous. She can join. For now.” 

Surge let out a breath she hadn’t realized she was holding in. “...Thanks. Just… point me at a target, and I’ll wreck it for you. Seriously, please give me a target, I’m getting antsy not breaking anything.” 

The sheep rolled her eyes (she had to ask for her name, she couldn’t keep thinking of this woman as “the sheep”) and pointed at a board behind her. “We’d been waiting for Tangle to get back so we could choose a base to hit next. We don’t have any particular strategic goals right now, but it’s always a good idea to keep Eggman’s forces from getting too numerous.”

Surge could have sworn she was vibrating. The sheep (Lanolin, she’d learned her name was Lanolin) had them hiding in a truck that an egg pawn was driving back to the Egg Base. The plan was that when they got there, Surge would rush out and wreak havoc, then once the badniks were well and truly focused on her, the others would make their way to the center of the base and find a way to shut the whole place down. It was a good plan, and it would give Surge the outlet she needed… But first, she had to be patient. Patience was not her strong suit. She only managed to restrain herself by thinking about how disappointed her new teammates, and Amy, would be if she messed everything up on her first mission.

When they were finally inside the base, though, Surge didn’t even wait for a signal; she zipped out immediately, frying every badnik in sight. It felt so right to be fighting again. It felt like this was what she was born to do, which she supposed was at least close to the truth. She may not have been meant for this when she was born, but when Starline remade her, it was as a weapon. This was all she was good for.

Surge growled, bouncing from bot to bot. She came here to escape thoughts like that, not give in to them! Amy had said she could be more. That she could fight her programming. Surge was going to prove her right, prove she was stronger than anything that damn platypus could put in her head. She was Surge the tenrec, damnit, she wasn’t about to lose to a dead man!

Distantly, she realized she heard someone’s voice. They were calling her name. 

She dragged herself back to reality. She was standing in a field of deactivated badniks. She was stomping on something. 

She glanced down, and saw a burnt and beaten piece of metal that she’d apparently damaged so badly she could only tell it used to be a robot’s head because the body was right there. 

Not all of the bots around her were damaged, so the Diamond Cutters - other Diamond Cutters, she reminded herself, she was part of their group now - must have completed their side of the plan. 

Tangle was standing a few feet away. “Surge…? Are you okay?” She sounded worried. How long had Surge been beating on this one badnik? Not having an answer to that worried her, she didn’t like losing time, it was too… familiar. 

“I’m… fine. I’m fine. Mission’s over?” Surge tried to casually lean against a nearby wall, stuffing her hands into her pockets, but she was breathing too hard. Her heart wouldn’t stop pounding in her chest, and her thoughts were a bit sluggish and hazy.

 “I think we need to get her back to HQ as soon as possible.” Huh, when did Lanolin show up? And Whisper was next to her. Had they been there the whole time?

Something soft wrapped around her torso; she glanced down and saw Tangle’s tail. “This is… really comfortable, but I can walk just fine.” 

Tangle lifted Surge off the ground, hands on her hips. “Nope! You might collapse, or wander off and find something to fight! You’re getting carried, so you may as well enjoy it.”

The other Diamond Cutters had been talking about something the whole way back, but Surge had no idea what; she was just so tired, which was weird, because her body felt fine. Was it the programming? Was she exhausted from fighting that? Fuck, that was probably it. “I hope this shit gets easier eventually…” Now they were all looking at her. She tried to hide behind Tangle’s tail, which had the pleasant side-effect of immersing her further in softness. She’d have to ask to get this treatment again some time. 

“Surge…? You hope what gets easier?” She opened her mouth to respond, and promptly choked on fur. Tangle released her, and she took a minute to catch her breath. 

“The… being a person. I’m supposed to be a weapon, it’s not easy ignoring that.” 

The tail wrapped back around her, more gently this time, like a hug. “It’ll get easier, and if it doesn’t, we’ll find a way to MAKE it easier!” Tangle looked and sounded so confident. It was more reassuring than Surge really thought it should have been. 

She felt weird. Hey, these three knew how to be people, maybe they’d know what was going on? “Hey, uh. Do any of you maybe know why spending time with you makes me feel… weird? It happens when I’m with Amy, too. Whenever one of you is nice to me, it just feels weird.” She wasn’t sure why her cheeks were burning, but she wished they weren’t because that was pretty clearly what Tangle and Lanolin were staring at. “Stop staring, you’re making it worse! Come on help me out here, it’s not like I can go to a library to figure this shit out.” They were still just staring, why were they still just staring? “I mean you’re all just so kind, and pretty, and FUCK I SAID THAT OUT LOUD.” Maybe if she buried herself in the fur she would vanish and not have to deal with this. “I don’t even know why I’m so embarrassed! I don’t know what all of this shit MEANS!” 

Tangle grinned, pulling Surge over for a proper hug, with her arms this time. “Awww, you think I’m pretty?”

Whisper just groaned. “Tangle… I don’t think now is the time…” 

Surge looked between them. “Wait, wait, what exactly is going on? Because I uh… I don’t think I mind it, whatever it is…” 

Whisper looked like she was in pain. “Look, once we get Amy to join us, we can talk about this properly, since you’ve said you feel this towards her too.” 

Lanolin rolled her eyes and leaned over to put an arm around Surge. “You’re just proving you’re a good fit for the group, since the rest of us are already in a polycule.”

Amy peered at the shirt she had pulled off the rack. It sure had a lot of tears in it… would Surge like that? Was that her style? Wait… was that one over… ah. This was a men’s shirt. Maybe she had enough shirts picked out already? She wanted to make sure she had at least a few things that Surge would like. The girl needed clothes that didn’t remind her of her time with that awful Eggman wannabe. Rouge had recommended this place, so she was sure the clothes would be okay, even if they weren’t really Amy’s style. Ah, her phone was ringing. She set the shirt back, pulled out her phone, and - It was Lanolin.

Her heart froze. Had something gone wrong? Had Surge decided to betray them? She hit the button to answer. “What happened? Is Surge okay? Are you okay?”

There were people talking in the background on Lanolin’s side, but she couldn’t make out what they were saying. “Amy, I’m gonna need you to calm down. Honestly, I’ve seen enough freak outs today. Surge is… well, physically she’s unharmed, but I need you to come over here. We have things we need to talk about.”

Amy ran over to the tired-looking teenager manning the cash register, shoving the pile of clothes she’d picked out into their hands. “Could you hold these for me? I need to go, but I’ll be back for them tomorrow, I swear!” She rushed out of the store before she heard their answer, shoving her phone back into her purse.

“Amy? You still there? …She freaked out, didn’t she…”

Surge fidgeted in her seat. When was Amy going to get here? Lanolin and Whisper both refused to explain anything to her until Amy got here, to avoid going over things twice. Lanolin had said the Diamond Cutters were in a polycule. Surge was pretty sure a few pieces of her vocabulary had gotten shoved out to make room for Starline’s programming, but… polycules had something to do with dating, right? Wait, did they think she wanted to date them? …DID she want to date them? It felt like a few things were clicking back into place, but it still felt strange to think about doing anything as soft and peaceful as loving another person. 

Lanolin’s hand was on her shoulder. “...I won’t say we don’t have to talk about anything if you don’t want to, but… It’s okay to not have answers. First priority is trying to keep what happened on that mission from happening again, everything else we can take a bit slower.”

Surge took a deep breath. Right. Not everything had to get settled today. “...Thanks. Man, this ‘being a person’ shit is exhausting, how do you all do it?” 

Lanolin snorted, and Surge relaxed a little. Knowing someone else here was alright with joking about all of this made it seem less overwhelming. Lanolin grinned at her for a moment before turning to Tangle. “Hey, I think we could use a tail blanket over here! And not just for her, Whisper I want you to get over here too, it’s group destressing time!”

Amy really wished she’d been able to get her car windows fixed before now, the wind blowing in was very distracting. Sure, she could slow down, but what if something else happened and she didn’t get there in time? She just couldn’t take that chance!

She nearly fell on her face getting out of the car when she finally did reach Restoration HQ. She made a mental note to apologize to the guards she was running past; she would usually greet them and ask how things were going. When she reached the Diamond Cutters' meeting room, she finally let herself pause to catch her breath. She couldn’t hear anything from the other side of the door, so there couldn’t have been anything going on that needed her right that second.

She took one last deep breath, and opened the door to find… all four Diamond Cutters cuddling together with Tangle’s tail wrapped around them. “...What… is going on?”

She couldn’t see Surge’s face - she was in the center, obscured by everyone else - but she heard a quiet “oh shit” from inside the mass of fur.

“Amy! Wanna join the tail blanket? It’s very relaxing.” Tangle was just grinning at her. What was going on?

“Tangle, what on earth- I was so worried, I thought it was an emergency! Everything looks fine!” She was so confused, hadn’t Lanolin implied Surge had freaked out-

“Lemme out, this is all my fault so I should explain!” Surge squirmed her way out, ignoring Tangle’s admittedly very cute puppy dog eyes. “So, I uh… kinda lost it when the fighting started. Guess I just really needed the outlet-” 

Surge was cut off by Lanolin slapping her arm. “It was a lot more serious than that! I am not about to let you downplay this!” She shoved Surge back over to Tangle and Whisper. “She didn’t just ‘kind of’ lose it, she was so focused on destroying things even after we’d deactivated all the badniks that Tangle had to call her name FIVE TIMES before she snapped out of it!” Lanolin’s voice got louder the longer she spoke, and she was gesturing wildly to emphasize her words. “And then she tried to act like nothing was wrong, when we could clearly see she was just as surprised to find out what she was doing as we were!”

Surge shrank further and further into herself as Lanolin spoke, not wanting to look at Amy’s face in case she was disappointed in her. At least they weren’t talking about the other thing. The idea of Amy thinking she was weird, or creepy, or wanting her to leave… That was far worse than just her being disappointed in Surge.

Amy rushed forward to hug Surge as soon as it was clear Lanolin was done speaking. “Surge… Why didn’t you tell me what was wrong? I thought you were just a bit restless…”

Amy had grabbed Surge’s face and forced her to look her in the eyes. The hedgehog didn’t look disappointed.. A little upset, yes, but she mostly looked… concerned. “Why are you always so… kind… and beautiful…” It took a moment for her to realize she’d said that out loud. When would she learn to keep her internal monologue from becoming external?

Lanolin was visibly holding back laughter. “Wow, you really just don’t have a filter between your mind and your mouth, huh? But uh… yeah, that was the other thing we wanted to bring you here to talk about.” Surge just whined - she had meant for it to be a somewhat more dignified sort of groan, and winced when she heard herself.

Amy stared at Surge for several seconds, a blush spreading across her face. “...So I was right… I thought.. I thought I was just projecting…”

Surge’s mind buzzed, too many thoughts running together to make sense of them, but one stood out. “...Projecting? Do you…” That didn’t make sense. Her having a crush on Amy made sense, Amy had eyes that glittered like emeralds, and a laugh that made her feel like she belonged, and she had given her a chance when she didn’t deserve one. Amy liking her was just ridiculous.

Tangle sat down next to Surge, pulling her in for a hug. “I can’t speak for the others, but I’d be willing to give you a chance. Honestly, you’re really cute when you’re embarrassed, and I really can’t hold what you’ve done in the past against you after what I saw on that last mission.” They were all smiling at her, even Whisper. It felt like her heart skipped a beat.

“You know this is too good to be true, don’t you? Someone like you, being loved? Don’t make me laugh.”

Surge went stiff, slowly turning to see Starline leaning against the table in the middle of the room. Her breathing slowed, and every other voice turned into a faint buzz in her ears. Starline smirked. “Did you think I was gone? That the power of love could get rid of me? You’ll never be free, and you know it. All of this pathetic sentimentality will have to end, sooner or later, and you’ll return to the role you were made for.”

She rose to her feet, her eyes never moving away from the ghost of her creator. “You’re not… real. You died. I don’t have to listen to you.” She was dimly aware of someone pulling on her arm.

Starline just kept smiling. “Then why am I still here? Clearly, some part of you thinks you need me.”

Surge heard lightning crackling all around her. “Get out. Of my. HEAD!”

The table was on fire. People were shouting. But Starline… Starline was gone. For now.

Someone was grabbing her arm again. She snarled, electricity leaping from her to - Oh, fuck. She’d zapped Tangle. Her eyes flickered between everyone in the room. They all looked shocked - it would be a moment before they reacted. Surge bolted out of the room. 

She had to get out. It was all falling apart. She’d hurt one of them, they wouldn’t keep putting up with her after this.

People were shouting as she rushed past. They’d turn on her soon. She knew they would. Where was the exit? She’d been so focused on trying to find the Diamond Cutters when she came here that she didn’t actually remember the path she took. She just had to keep moving. She’d find it eventually, and as long as she kept moving nobody could catch her.

The exit… Surge had finally found the exit. But Amy had found it first. She was talking into her wrist, telling the others she’d found Surge. Surge tried to run past her, but Amy managed to tackle her to the ground. Distantly, she realized she should’ve known Amy could keep up with her at least a little bit, after all the time she’d spent chasing Sonic.

“Surge, please, just calm down! It’s alright!”

That couldn’t be right. “It’s not alright, I hurt her, I hurt someone who was trying to help me and I have to leave, I have to get out before everyone realizes I can’t be trusted!” She struggled, but Amy was even stronger than she was, and she didn’t want to hurt her so her lightning wasn’t an option.

“No! We want to help you, we aren’t mad at you, Surge, we’re worried!” 

Amy was crying. Surge stopped struggling, staring up at her. 

“You… I’m not worth crying over…” 

Amy blinked, and then apparently decided to go back on her statement of not being mad at Surge. “Yes, you are! Just like everyone else who’s hurting and confused! You’ve been trying so hard to be better, I am not about to let you hate yourself for making a single mistake!”

Surge started to shake. Amy wrapped her arms around her. Surge leaned into her shoulder, and let herself cry. “It’ll be okay. You don’t have to be alone. You have us, now.”

Somehow, hearing it after everything Amy had done for her… Surge could almost believe her.

They sat together for what felt like an hour or so, before Surge wiped away her tears and dragged herself to her feet. “...Tangle. I… Is she alright?” The buzz in Surge’s mind was starting to fade, and she was realizing she had to go make things right.

“She’ll be fine, she just needs to take it easy for a bit.” Amy had let go of her, but her hands were raised like she was worried Surge was about to fall and she’d have to catch her.

Tangle was tough. How badly had Surge hurt her that she needed rest? “Shit, which way is she? I need to apologize, I need to make sure she’s okay-” 

Amy spun her around to look into her eyes. “Surge, listen to me. She’s going to be alright. You do need to apologize, but you also need to stay calm. Take a few deep breaths, and I’ll take you back to her.”

They were at the door. Amy was waiting for Surge to enter first, but she was frozen to the spot. Would they forgive her? Would they hate her? Would they never allow her back into the group? She shook her head, trying to dispel her fears. She certainly wouldn’t get their forgiveness by just standing here.

When she opened the door, she saw Tangle sitting in a chair, with Whisper hovering next to her. Lanolin wasn't there, and neither was the table. Surge shrank back as they turned to look at her, but Amy gently pushed her forward.

She stood awkwardly in front of the two Diamond Cutters for a few seconds, avoiding eye contact, before finally gathering her courage. “Hey… Sorry for electrocuting you. Are you alright…?”

Tangle moved to leap forward with her arms spread wide, but Whisper held her back, and moved a damp cloth Surge hadn’t noticed before back onto Tangle's arm. “Stop trying to move so much, it keeps falling off! …She’s fine. Are you alright?”

“What? Yeah, nobody attacked me! ”

Tangle stopped trying to shoo Whisper away. “...Surge, you had a full on panic attack.” Both Diamond Cutters looked at her skeptically. Amy did too.

Surge squirmed. “I… I'm a bit better, thanks to Amy.” Why had the focus shifted to her? “Look, that's not why I came back, I came back to say I'm sorry, and to ask… if I could still be a Diamond Cutter. I'll work to be better, to keep my issues from hurting other people, I swear!”

“Wh- of course you can still be one of us! Geez, did you think I would hate you or something? This isn't even that bad, Whisper just won't let me get rid of this stupid cloth until the burn is completely gone.”

Whisper stared at Tangle silently for a few seconds, then sighed - more loudly than she usually spoke. “...I am surrounding myself with women who don't know how to take care of themselves. I have learned nothing.”

Surge shook her head and sat down on Tangle’s other side. Amy found a stool to sit on. “...Thanks. Where's Lanolin?”

“Oh, she got some people to help her get that table out of here after we put the fire out, I think she's talking to Jewel about getting something we can use until it's fixed up.” Tangle was just chatting happily with her like nothing had happened. Surge didn't think she would ever understand these people. 

After a few minutes of Tangle single-handedly fighting off an awkward silence, the door opened to admit an exhausted-looking Lanolin. “Oh thank Gaia, Amy managed to bring you back. Can I ask what all that was about? You were shouting at someone none of us could see.” She was leaning against the wall beside the door.

Surge hunched her shoulders, looking at the floor. She hadn't wanted anyone to know about this. “I… sometimes, I see Starline. It’s not pleasant. Don’t wanna talk about it.”

Lanolin just nodded, tapping a finger against her leg as she thought. “...Well, just… tell us next time you see him. I'm not really sure if we can help, but we don't abandon people just because they’re struggling. We'll figure out a way to handle this, together.”

Amy smiled at Surge from the other side of the room. Tangle nodded furiously, arms crossed. Whisper walked around Tangle to sit next to Surge, putting a hand on her shoulder. Surge turned to her, and Whisper opened her eyes briefly to make eye contact, nodding silently, before moving her hand away.

The conversation soon turned to when they’d get their table back, but Surge tuned it out, leaning back against the wall. A warm feeling swelled in her chest. They weren’t going to leave her behind. It was hard to believe, but they just kept proving it to her. She swore to herself that she wouldn’t abandon them either; no matter what happened, she would stick with these people.