Chapter Text
The day had really started out pretty normally. Most of 1-A was gathered in the common room, studying or hanging out. Denki had been playing video games with Jirou, but Bakugou had slammed a textbook into the top of Denki’s skull and screamed at him that he needed to study.
“You need a new love language, dude!” Denki said, rubbing the top of his head.
Bakugou snatched the controller away from Denki’s weakened grasp and threw it across the room. Sero caught it with his tape before it could hit the ground. Denki had an instant to wonder if maybe Bakugou had thrown it that way on purpose, knowing Sero would catch it, but he couldn’t be sure. Bakugou could be really hard to read sometimes.
“It’s not a fucking love language, dipshit!” In the background, Uraraka motioned wildly for the controller. Sero looked a bit surprised, but softballed it to her. “You just need to get better fucking grades!” Uraraka caught it, just in time to for Jirou to trounce Denki’s character. She hadn’t stopped playing just because Denki hadn’t been controlling his character. “So get your ass off of those stupid games and start fucking studying! Fucking Shitty Hair and Raccoon Eyes have it figured out already!”
Indeed, Ashido and Kirishima were already sitting at one of the common tables. Kirishima was frowning down intensely at a textbook. Ashido was half-laying on the desk and mouthed ‘save me’ when she saw Denki looking.
“I regret ever asking for your help with any of this,” Denki said, still rubbing his sore head. Uraraka was begging Jirou for a rematch. Jirou was looking a bit shocked that Uraraka was willing to play at all, but started another match. Uraraka picked a pink character, instead of the muscle-bound fighter Denki had been using.
“Get to the fucking table!” Bakugou actually grabbed Denki and shoved him.
“I’m moving, I’m moving!”
Denki didn’t want to study right now, but if he mentioned that, Bakugou would retort with ‘you never want to study, dumbass,’ and Denki wouldn’t have a good response to that, so he just kept quiet and sat dejectedly at the table next to Ashido. She leaned her head against his shoulder immediately, sighing. He patted her hand. “I get it, I get it. We’ll get through this together.”
“We’ll fail out of UA together, you mean?”
Denki laughed, then leaned over to see if Kirishima was going to commiserate. No, he was still frowning at his paper, chewing his lip. It looked painful, with those teeth.
Denki looked down at Ashido. “If we do, promise me we’ll start a hero agency together, where we’re just the stupid heroes, okay?”
“It’s a deal. We’ll have high school dropouts for sidekicks, too.” Ashido stuck out her pinky. Denki reached out with his as well to complete the promise–
Bakugou picked up Denki’s chair with Denki in it and put it on the other side of the table, ignoring how Ashido fell over with a yelp. “You two chucklefucks don’t get to sit together. I know you won’t focus. Open your damn book and start reading.” Bakugou slammed the textbook down in front of Denki. He walked back to Ashido and picked her up and reseated her, then sat himself down next to her, ignoring how she stuck her tongue out at him.
Denki sighed. Nothing to it, he’d have to try to make his brain work.
Kirishima had started writing, his pencil tapping on the paper. Ashido sighed, even louder than Denki had.
He’d have to make his brain work, even if it was almost physically painful to read the words.
“WHAT?!” That was Jirou! “How did you win?? You’re just button mashing!”
“I don’t know, it just worked out! Another match?” Good to know Uraraka was having fun, at least.
Oh, there was a full paragraph gone. Denki had no idea what he’d just read. He’d have to start over. Great! He loved studying! So much!!
“Everyone, can I have your attention, please?”
Oh thank goodness, a distraction! Denki looked up.
Everyone was staring in surprise at Todoroki standing in the middle of the common room. Iida and Midoriya were standing next to him, both of them looking concerned.
“I’ve found another way to piss my father off, and I’d like one of the guys to help me with it, if you’re willing.” Todoroki examined the room, but everyone was quiet, riveted to his words. Denki didn’t think he’d ever actually seen the guy make an announcement to the whole class like this before. Jirou had even paused the video game. “My father doesn’t like gay people, so,” Todoroki looked down at his clenched fist with a wild look in his eyes, “I need a boyfriend by the end of the day.” He looked up again, studying everyone. “Is there anyone willing to work with me on this?”
Into the silence that followed that proclamation, Denki said, “Duuuuuuuude, I’m down! I’ll be your fake boyfriend!”
“That is the dumbest thing I have ever heard of,” Bakugou grumbled, not even bothering to look up from his own textbook.
Todoroki focused on Denki, looking surprised. “You mean it?”
“Pfft, yeah! This sounds great!”
“Thank you.”
There was a brief silence. Midoriya looked worried, and Iida’s arms were crossed over his chest, while he frowned. Sort of an odd vibe.
“So how are we doing this?” Denki asked to break the tension. Very odd question, to be fair, and the environment with the entire class watching them made it even weirder.
“I don’t actually know.”
“Todoroki…” Midoriya said hesitantly. “Is this really a good idea?”
Iida pushed his glasses up his nose. “It doesn’t seem appropriate to distract the number one hero so soon after his appointment with something like this.”
“Yes, Midoriya, Iida, I must do this,” Todoroki said, clearly determined.
“Do it, it’ll be fucking hilarious to see him upset,” Bakugou said.
“Hey, Blasty, I thought you just said it was a dumb idea!” Ashido yelled at Bakugou.
“It can be dumb and funny at the same time. Like Sparky himself.” Bakugou smirked to himself at his own joke.
“Did you just call me funny?” Denki put his hand to his chest. “That is the nicest thing you have ever said to me.”
“Endeavor’s a bigot, he’s going to be upset one way or another,” Uraraka pointed out. “And Bakugou is a fan of the idea now because Deku wasn’t, obviously.”
“Oi! Take that back, Pink Cheeks!”
Uraraka leveled a look at him. “No.” Jirou snorted, and Uraraka smiled at her.
“Anyway, let’s go plan how to most upset Endeavor!” Kaminari leapt up from the table, linked his arm with Todoroki’s, and pulled him towards the dorm rooms. It was a way to get out of studying. “Let’s gooooo, boyfriend!!”
Ashido catcalled as they left the common room together. “OW OW! Let me know if you guys need condoms!”
The elevator doors closed on everyone shouting and the sound of Bakugou fake-retching.
“Your room or mine?” Denki asked as he let go of the other guy and leaned back against one of the walls. Todoroki was staring intently at the floor of the elevator.
“Hm?” It was like he’d been so deep in thought it was like he hadn’t even heard Denki.
“My room it is!” Denki said, taking Todoroki’s arm again and leading him out of the elevator once the doors opened. “Sorry, it’s a bit of a mess.”
“That’s fine,” Todoroki said mildly.
Of course, when they actually got to Denki’s room, Todoroki did a double-take, staring in shock at everything.
“It’s so… bright?”
“Yeah, just the way I like it!” Denki sat down on his bedspread. “So what’s the plan?”
“A plan?”
“Yeah! How are we going to upset Endeavor the most?”
“Um. Tell him I have a boyfriend now. I thought that would do it.”
“What?! No, that’s boring! That’s not enough!”
“What?”
“You gotta plan things! You gotta have ideas! For this to be convincing, we have to actually look like a couple, you know? Rub his nose into the fact that his son has a boyfriend! We gotta, like, do PDA! Go on dates, or to family dinners! Tag each other on Instagram! You know, all that kind of stuff!”
“Hm,” Todoroki said, looking pensive again. Denki waited. Todoroki was a brilliant strategist, so whatever he came up with would be great.
Finally, Todoroki looked up. “What’s PDA?”
“Oh,” Denki felt all of his enthusiasm slump for a bit at realizing just how sheltered Todoroki was. “Okay. So I’m the idea guy here, then? Yeah, that’s a problem, isn’t it?” Denki shook his head. “Nope! Nope, it’s not, we’re going to be positive about this. I have a notebook somewhere, we can write some stuff down…”
Denki slid onto the floor and searched through his school supplies for a while, Todoroki sitting quietly on his bed.
“How have I managed to write in every single notebook I have?” Denki wondered out loud. “Oh well, we’ll just use…” he flipped the notebook over to see the front of the cover, “math. We’ll use the math notebook. Actually, I was looking for this a while ago. How was it in my room this whole time? Looks like I only used it for three days anyway.” Denki re-settled himself down next to Todoroki. “Okay, we got a notebook! Right, so–”
“You need a pen,” Todoroki said.
“–yeah, obviously! A pen! I need a pen! Um,” Denki squinted at the mess of his room. “Where would a pen be?”
“There are seven on your desk.”
“Yeah, that’s a good spot for a pen to be.” Denki reached across and got a pen, and opened the notebook to a blank page. The pen didn’t work. He threw it onto the floor, knowing that with Todoroki watching he’d never make it into the trash can, and got another one. It worked!
“Alright, now we’re ready for some planning!” Denki’s pen hovered over the page. He didn’t actually know what to write down.
“What’s PDA?” Todoroki asked again.
“Public Displays of Affection,” Denki said. “Like hand holding, hugging, stuff like that.”
“You publicly display affection with everyone around you. How will that let anyone know that you’re my boyfriend?”
“Uh,” Denki said, still completely unused to Todoroki referring to him as his boyfriend. “What?”
“You touch everyone, all of the time,” Todoroki clarified. “PDA. Hugging, hand holding, with everyone around you. How does that tell anyone that we’re dating?”
“I do?”
“Yes. Usually you’re hugging Ojiro’s tail, for example. I’ve even seen you hold hands with Bakugou before.”
“I HAVE?!”
“It didn’t last for very long. He exploded at you pretty quickly. But yes, you have.”
“Yeah, that sounds right, actually.” Denki considered that. “Um, well, maybe if we’re ALWAYS right next to each other? Or like. Sometimes? PDA can include.” Denki looked at Todoroki. Todoroki looked calmly back. Did Denki look into the gray brown eye, or the bright green eye? If he looked at his green eye, did it look like he was staring at the scar too much? Was that insensitive? Whatever. Denki wasn’t up to mentioning that PDA could include kissing.
Yet.
Maybe?
No. This was a fake relationship. That would be weird.
Anyway.
Denki cleared his throat. “So, I think, instead of just ‘announcing’ that we’re now dating, we, like, build up to it slowly, so it seems more believable?”
“Alright,” Todoroki said. He seemed really agreeable to all of this so far. Denki had no idea why Bakugou couldn’t get along with him, but then again, that was just kind of how Bakugou was sometimes.
Denki wrote ‘Slow Buildup’ at the top of the notebook page.
“So the most obvious thing to do in public together is go on dates.” ‘Dates’ went under ‘Slow Buildup.’ “Anything you want to do for a date?”
“I have no idea what’s involved in dating.”
“Yeah, sure!” What. The fuck? Talk about sheltered. Or nervous? Did Todoroki get nervous? That didn’t seem right. “You like going to the movies?”
“Like in the theaters?”
“Yep!”
Todoroki looked off into the distance, or at least it looked like he tried to, but his eyes caught on the bright patterns around Denki’s room. “I think I do?”
“You think? If you don’t like this idea, dude, you can just say so, you know?”
“It’s been a while since I’ve been to the movies, but I think I enjoyed it last time I went.”
“...okay. We can work with that. So let’s go to the movies for our first date. Anything you want to see?”
Todoroki’s eyes went around Denki’s room again. “What are the options?”
“You don’t know any of the movies that are out right now?”
“No. Do you?”
“Yeah?” Did he really never come across commercials for movies? Amazing. How did he live his life? “How about we just go for a rom-com? Since, you know, you have no context for dating. We’ll be killing two birds with one stone, yeah.”
“That saying has never made any sense to me. Why do we need one stone to kill two birds?”
“Honestly, same!! In what real-life situation are stones really that hard to find? Like, just pick up several stones! They’re, like, on the ground and stuff!”
“That makes more sense to me than trying to get the right angle for one stone to kill two birds.”
“Glad we’re on the same page. So–rom-com sound good?” For once it was Denki bringing someone else back to focusing on what they were supposed to be working on. And the someone was Todoroki, of all people. Practically the most focused person in 1-A. This was insane.
“Sure.”
Denki wrote ‘Movie: ROM-COM’ under ‘Dates.’
“And then we can go somewhere for, like, as a study date? Because if you are my boyfriend, you’re gonna help me with my grades, right?” Denki grinned, as charmingly as he could manage. Hey, it might not be exactly ethical to leverage this to his own advantage, but he needed the help and he didn’t know if more of Bakugou’s tough love would be healthy for him.
“Sure.” Damn, Todoroki was nice.
“Cool! And I figure after that, we’ll be posting on our Instagrams about this the whole time, what few followers we have will probably alert Endeavor at some point, and then he’ll accept that you, his most beloved son is gay, and then bam!! He’s no longer a homophobe. We’ll have made the world a better place!”
Todoroki’s eyes narrowed. “I don’t think that’s how he’ll react.”
“Eh.” Denki was putting active thought into not considering how easily the number one hero could kill him. “We’ll burn that bridge down when we get to it, right?” he said jokingly. Oh, burn. Burn. Like Endeavor’s quirk. Hellfire. Ahhhhhh…..
It’s not like he’d actually be in any danger though. Endeavor was just intimidating, was all.
Todoroki shrugged. “That works.”
“Hey, Todoroki,” Denki said, hesitating. Todoroki turned to face Denki, waiting patiently. Denki once again panicked internally over what eye he was supposed to look at. “Do you know what a rom-com is?”
“No.”
Yeah, that wasn’t really a surprise to Denki at this point. “Romantic comedy. ...I’m gonna make up a list of movies that we should watch, okay? Aside from just our date. I feel like you should have a better knowledge of pop culture than this.”
“Okay.”
“Ohhhhh, we’ll have to ask Aizawa for permission to go off campus, won’t we?”
“Yes.”
Denki hung his head. “Can you do that? I don’t think Aizawa-sensei likes me very much.”
“Okay.” Todoroki pulled his phone out. Was he actually about to send out an email right now? He really got things done! “Why do you think he doesn’t like you?” Todoroki asked.
“Because I’m a bad student? What more reason does he need?”
Todoroki met Denki’s eyes for an instant, frowning, but didn’t respond, just looked back at his phone. Denki leaned over to see what he was saying.
“‘Kaminari and I would like to leave campus for two hours on Saturday. Todoroki.’” Denki read out loud. “Say three hours, that way we have time to maybe get food after.” Denki would love to push it more, but he knew Aizawa would never agree to it.
Todoroki made the change and then sent the email. Wow. He really was tough stuff. Denki would have agonized over that email. And Todoroki had just typed out one line and sent it. No reasons, no excuses, nothing friendly. Just matter-of-fact and straight to the point.
“I’ll let you know when he responds,” Todoroki said.
“Cool.”
“What do you think about what Midoriya and Iida said?”
“What?” Was Todoroki of all people asking for Denki’s advice? What a new world this was. “I mean… how do you feel about it? Endeavor is your father. You know him better than pretty much anyone, right?”
“I don’t know if I do. We’re not exactly close.”
That was weird. Hadn’t Endeavor been yelling like a maniac when Midoriya convinced Todoroki to use his fire during the Sports Festival? Denki was getting the feeling there was more to the family history than was immediately apparent.
Todoroki’s phone buzzed. He unlocked it to check the response from Aizawa.
Denki leaned over his shoulder again to read it. “‘sure,’” he read out loud. “It’s not even capitalized. Wow.”
“Is there something wrong with that?”
“It’s just not very formal. I dunno. I don’t think he ever would have been so casual.”
“He naps in his sleeping bag and leaves Iida to monitor the class.”
Denki considered that. “Yeah, fair, fair. I mean I guess I don’t think he’d ever talk to me like that, you know? Like he’s way stricter with me. I feel. Sometimes.”
“We can test it. Next time you can ask.”
“Yeah, sure!” Denki didn’t want to. “Oh, we should probably get the class to agree to not tell anyone that we’re fake dating, right?”
“Yes, that would be a necessary part of the plan.”
It wasn’t until after they’d gone back downstairs to try to convince the class to keep quiet that Denki realized they’d never finished the conversation about Midoriya’s and Iida’s point of view about the fake relationship.