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It had been a day since it happened. Jihoon had been told to sleep it off but he hadn't been able to catch much of the rest he desperately needed. So instead he layed in bed thinking. About nothing and everything. Occasionally he would write down a thought he had in his notebook but that took too much effort so it only happens a few times. The day went by slowly otherwise. With the members coming by not more then three at the time to make sure he stayed on bed rest. Soonyoung took this job seriously.
"You know you don't need to check on me every hour?" Jihoon asked when Soonyoung came into their shared room on the clock. "I know I don't. But I want to. Is that not allowed?" Soonyoung said as he walked into the room. The room was big enough to give both of them their own space if they needed it. It had a king size bed under the window, a big shared closet and a small home studio in the corner for Jihoon which was mostly a desk with some equipment and just enough room for this laptop.
Jihoon rolled his eyes at Soonyoungs question. He decided to ignore it and instead inquired about something else. "Do you think I should tell them?" "Tell who what?" "Carats. About my condition." Soonyoung stayed silent for a minute. Like he did when deep in thought. "Only if you want to. The company already put out a statement. You don't have to say anything."
Jihoon let that answer sink over until he finally fell asleep.
The next morning he made up his mind. "Soon-ah?" Soonyoung made a noise of acknowledgement. "Will you do a live with me?" "Sure, when?" "Now. I want to tell them."
That's how they ended up on the floor of their bedroom with Jihoons phone propped up against a pile of books. Almost the second the live started they were flooded with comments asking if Jihoon was okay. "I'm okay. Just very tired." Jihoon reassured them. "I actually came live today to clear up the air about what happened on stage. the other day." Jihoon started. "I have a condition called Postural or orthostatic syncope or POTS for short. I won't go into much details right now but it's a condition that causes me to faint. I developed it about two years ago and I have been on medication since. But I recently have been taken off it in favor of new medication. I talked to the company and we thought that it would be okay for me to go on stage without medication because it would be before it stopt working. I ended up fainting regardless and worrying all of you. But don't worry I'm okay. Me fainting is nothing to be concerned about." Jihoon explained. With each word it felt like a weight was lifted off him little by little.
The comments flooded with questions which they could read off SoonYoungs phone. "How did I find out about POTS? Well I went through lots of doctors to find out what was wrong with me. For some people it comes on slowly but for me it was suddenly all at once. I suddenly couldn't get through dance practice like I used to. We would be less than 10 minutes in and I was sweating buckets. I had to sit out often because I couldn't just couldn't do much without fainting or feeling like I was going to faint. A lot of doctors couldn't find what was wrong with me. But I was eventually diagnosed. I thought I would have to leave seventeen but I managed."
"The internet says that your heart rate goes up when you stand. Is that true?" Soonyoung read. "I have my smart watch on so I can show you. I hope I don't faint though. Because I need to be extra careful off medication." Jihoon clicked his watch on and swiped to the next page which had his heart rate. "Right now my heart rate is 75 BPM." He said before showing it to the camera. They got up and grabbed his phone and got up.
Now standing he showed his watch again. The numbers were steadily climbing all the way up to 137. "My heart rate rises when I do pretty much anything. It doesn't mean that I'm always going to faint when it does. I won't always feel as great though and I have to make sure I eat and rest enough to make my symptoms more manageable. However I do think I'm going to faint soon." Jihoon announced. Soonyoung who was standing behind him quickly wrapped his arms around him and helped him lie on floor.
"Want me to stop the live?" Soonyoung asked as he took Jihoon's phone from his hand. "No. It's okay. Just leave it on. I want to show them." Soonyoung put the phone back against the stack of books where it originally was before going back to Jihoon and holding up his legs to help the blood flow.
Jihoon tried to keep talking through the live but started feeling heavier by the second. It was like he was hurtling to the edge of consciousness as his visions started spotting. He might have been talking gibberish but he couldn't be sure as he was now tethering on the very edge. He could hear Soonyoung say something along the lines of squeezing something. Might have been his hands but there was a sudden push making him go over the edge. His eyes rolling back was the and plummeting down into unconsciousness.
"There he is." Soonyoungs voice sounded far away as Jihoon came to. The hands on his legs told a different story though. Jihoon blinked the blurriness from his eyes but always took a bit to adjust. He stayed flat on the ground knowing after two years that he would have a way worse experience if he tried to get up.
"Still want to stay live?" Soonyoung aske when Jihoon finally sat up. For a second Jihoon was confused until he remembered he went live with Soonyoung before he fainted. "Let it stay on." Soonyoung nodded and grabbed his hand as he read trough the comments?" Jihoon nodded but quickly stopt when he got dizzy again. "Oh before that. Jeonhan hyung came by. He went to grab you some salt. You left it in his bag apprently." Soonyoung informed him. Jihoons face immidatly soures at the word salt and Soonyoung couldn't help but let out a laugh. "Stop laughing. Salt is disusting." Jihoon whined. "It can't be that bad. I have seen you put heaps of salt of basicly anything." "You try it then." Jihoon deceide to test his luck and turned his head to his phone. "Should he try it with me?" The comments flooded with people encourginhg Soonyoung to take it with Jihoon. "Fine, fine, I'll do it." Soonyoung gave in.
Just then the hotelroom door opened. "Soon-ah. Is he awake yet? I found the salt." Jeonghan asked as he walked in with a little red rice bowl container. "I'm up." Jihoon anwsered. "Great the kids are worried. I had to put Vernon and Seungkwam in Seungcheols room to prevent them form coming here." Jeonghan said as he handed the salt to Jihoon. "Thanks hyung. They can come if they want. We are live tho." "I'll tell them."
"Help me sit up." Jihoon said when the door closed behind Jeonghan. Soonyoung did as careful as possible but Jihoon still got dizzy for a second. "Salt time." Jihoon anoounced when he felt better. "Before we do." He lifted up the little ricebowl container to the phone. "It is an old lipbalm container that Seungcheol gave me." He opned the container and took a pinch of salt and let it fall on his tongue. He cringed at the the taste. "I swear I will never get used to it. But now its your turn Soon-ah." Jihoon couldn't read Soonyoungs exprersion. He probaly wanted to show off and act like he could take the tasted of the salt. But when Jihoon let some same amount fall onto his tongeu he couldn't help but cringe at the taste too. "Ugh, that horrible." "Told you." Jihoon smiled, proud of himself.
...........
After the live they had eneded up cuddeld in bed just being close to eachother. "How do you feel? Now that you told them." Soonyoung asked all of a sudden. "Lighter. Almost like I can stop pretending eventhough I never really did."