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Running through the forest, John didn't even know where he was.
He barely knew which way was up and which way was down; the blinding pain in his head dominating everything else and blocking any rational thoughts he might have had in regards to planning his next move. All he knew was that he needed to fucking get away, one way or another.
Maybe he was running straight into more danger than he'd already been in, but it was hard to imagine that possibility. He would have ended up dead if he hadn't taken the opportunity to run, and that was the only thing he was certain of right now.
Part of him felt sick with guilt that he hadn't checked if any of the other guys on that cart had still been alive before he'd made a run for it, but the tiny part of his brain that was still thinking rationally knew that he couldn't have afforded to. The guy next to him had still been alive, quietly muttering to himself, and those evil bastards had killed him with a fucking shovel. The poor guy's blood was still on his face, for Christ's sakes. He knew he only would have met the same fate if he'd hung around any longer than he had.
His ribs screamed with every step that he took, begging him to stop running. He knew that a couple of them were more than likely broken, but he couldn't afford to stop moving, not even for a second. If he stopped, he'd be caught again, and then God only knew what they'd do to him for making an attempt to escape in the first place.
His ribs weren't even the worst of his injuries, but he refused to let himself dwell on that for a second. It'd be too easy to just let himself give up if he thought about it for too long; if he thought about the fact that he was probably going to die anyway.
He felt almost dizzy from the pain in his head, and his stomach was rolling with nausea with every step that he took. Taking that crack to his head had been the last thing he remembered before waking up on the cart, and he honestly wouldn't have been surprised if they'd cracked his skull with the force of it.
There were spots blurring the edges of his vision, and a tiny part of him couldn't help but hope that his injuries were bad enough to kill him. It would have felt like a kinder fate than whatever it was that was awaiting him.
He knew that stopping was the worst possible thing he could do in this moment, since he didn't know if he was being followed or not, but he eventually trailed to a stop, leaning back against the tree closest to him.
He physically couldn't run anymore. He could barely breathe because of the pain in his ribs, and there was blood in his eyes; blood that he was sure wasn't even completely his.
Maybe he'd be caught, but what was the worst that would happen to him, even if he was? He'd already been beaten to within an inch of his life, and so maybe it wouldn't be so bad if they killed him. It would be an escape from this pain, this terror.
Taking a step away from the tree, he pitched forward as he stomach suddenly turned, throwing up what little he'd eaten over the last day. It really hadn't been much, a few scraps of raw cabbage that he'd scrounged from a garden before he'd been caught, and so he had a feeling that the vomiting was due to the head injury more than anything else.
Once he'd thrown up everything that was in his stomach, and had spent the next couple of minutes retching up nothing but bile, he leaned back against the tree with a groan, fighting back the new wave of pain he felt as he moved.
He'd taken hits before. He remembered goading Curt into hitting him out on the wing of their fort that morning, after they'd spent the night out drinking. He was no stranger to picking bar fights either, but this was like nothing that he'd ever experienced before.
The right side of his face screamed with pain, and a bit of tentative prodding and poking found a nasty welt around his eye, already scabbed over with blood. He couldn't remember exactly when that had happened, the terror he'd felt in that bombed out town erasing any of the details that he might have remembered.
God, that was.. he didn't think he'd ever felt fear like that before.
He knew what it was like to feel adrenaline; a healthy fear that came with being up in a flying fortress, soaring through flak and enemy fighters. Despite that, though, despite the fact that he'd been twenty missions in when he'd eventually been shot down, he'd never felt terror like he had when those German civilians had turned on them.
It had been a blind panic more than anything else, only fuelled by the fact that their captors seemed more willing to shoot them than to help them when things had started getting out of hand.
If he survived this whole experience, he didn't think he'd ever forget how it had felt to see those civilians, trying to put their lives back together despite the sudden destruction surrounding them, and how it had felt when they'd turned on them and had accused them of destroying their lives, of killing their children.
All through this war, their jobs had been to drop bombs. At first, he'd been able to get through it because they didn't see the destruction that they left behind; they didn't see the women and children that might have been killed by their bombs. He'd told himself that those sort of casualties had been minimal, and that they'd only been hitting strategic targets. By this last mission, though, he hadn't fucking cared who they hit.
He'd been out for revenge, wanting nothing more than to kill every last German in this godforsaken country. He wanted to kill the bastards that had taken Gale from him.
Christ, Gale.
The other man hadn't crossed his mind since he'd been captured, and there was a part of him that felt almost guilty for that.
All along, he'd been hoping that Gale was alive, that he'd somehow managed to survive his plane going down, and that he'd make his way back to them. Now, part of him hoped that Gale had died, just because he couldn't face the thought of the younger man going through this sort of experience. It would have been a kinder fate if he'd died in his fort.
It was a horrible thought to think, but he knew that the chances of him ever seeing Gale again were slim to none, and so he hoped that if Gale had died, that it had at least been quick and painless, rather than being brutally beaten the way he had been.
Dropping his head back against the tree, he didn't bother fighting the tears that had started to roll down his cheeks, stinging the various cuts and scrapes on his face.
He knew he wouldn't survive this.
He didn't even know what direction he was running in, or where he was going to end up. It felt like he was miles out in the middle of nowhere, and so if he wasn't caught and executed for making an attempt at escaping, he was almost sure that he'd simply die out here.
Like he'd said, he was pretty sure that his skull was cracked, and his stomach was already rolling with nausea again, despite the fact that it was empty. He almost wanted to die, just so that he could stop feeling like this.
His breath caught in his throat as he gasped against the tears, the pain in his ribs flaring up again with the action, "God fucking damnit." He hissed, knocking his head back against the tree again, which only aggravated the wound at the back of his head.
A dog barking in the distance drew his attention, and he squeezed his eyes shut for a moment as he deliberated with himself on what to do.
The easy option would have been to simply sit here, to let them find him again. He was pretty sure that he'd be executed on sight if he was to do that, though, and while that didn't seem like the worst thing in the world right now, there was a part of him that still wanted to fight. He'd never been one to give up, even in the most horrific of circumstances.
So, he dragged himself to his feet again, swallowing thickly at how his stomach turned and his head swam for a moment, before doing his best to shake it off.
He knew that his movements were unsteady as he stumbled along, but he just needed to keep moving, to do whatever he could to get away. It didn't matter where he ended up, once he just kept moving forward.
Through the pain, and the fog, and the blind panic, though, he could hear the barking getting louder, followed by voices speaking in German. Maybe they'd catch him anyway, maybe he wasn't fast enough as he stumbled along.
"Fuck!" He stumbled as his foot caught on a branch on the ground, staggering to his knees.
Jesus fucking Christ. He'd thought that the pain was intense enough before; now, he felt like he was going to black out.
He'd caught himself on his knees when he'd first fallen, but he was suddenly tired of running from a fate that he was sure he'd meet in the end anyway. So, he let himself pitch forward, his vision swimming as he collapsed onto the ground.
He'd tried so goddamn hard, but what was the point? He knew he'd been shuffling along rather than properly running, and so he wasn't getting anywhere anytime soon. He could have been running towards his captors instead of away from them, for all of his sense of direction right now. He was pretty sure he was going to die anyway, and so what was the point in fighting it?
John.
He could hear the voices getting closer, and so he simply turned his face in against the ground, hoping that he'd at least black out from the pain before they found him. At least if they killed him, he wouldn't have to look down the barrel of their gun and wait for it to happen.
John.
It was strange that they knew his name, though, he didn't remember telling anybody his name after he'd been caught. That wasn't even the strangest part, the strangest part was that whoever was chasing him sounded just like Gale. That wasn't right, Gale was probably dead, not running after him through a forest in the middle of nowhere.
"John!"
He was startled awake as his cheek was gently tapped, his heart hammering in his chest as he looked up at Gale's concerned face.
"No, I.. I-" He stammered, pushing the sheets off of himself as he scrambled away from Gale, feeling disorientated and panicked.
"Hey, it's alright, it's just me." Gale said softly, reaching out for him.
"Buck?"
"Shh, it's alright." Gale whispered, curling in close to him as he wrapped his arms around him to hold him close, "I've got you, you're safe."
He losed his eyes, letting himself cling to Gale for a moment as he tried his best to calm down.
He'd been almost overwhelmed with blind panic when he'd woken up; disorientated and confused by how vivid his dream had been. It had taken him longer than it usually would to realise that he wasn't actually in that forest in Germany. He was safe at home, in his bedroom, with Gale next to him in their bed.
Christ, Goddamnit. This wasn't the first time that he'd woken up with nightmares.
Ever since he and Gale had gotten out of that damn camp and had made it home, it had been a fairly regular occurrence, it was just.. some nights were worse than others, some nights left him feeling more rattled than others. This had definitely been a bad one.
It wasn't all of the time. Most nights he was fine, he'd sleep through the night without any issues at all. Every so often though, he'd go to bed with that anxious feeling twisting in his stomach, and when he eventually managed to drop off to sleep, he'd usually wake an hour or so later with horrific nightmares.
Gale had never judged him for it, though, which he couldn't be more grateful for. He'd simply hold him through the particularly bad ones, try his best to wake him when he started tossing and turning, make him a cup of tea to calm him down afterwards. He couldn't even begin to say how much he appreciated having the younger man there when things were bad.
"I'm sorry." He eventually whispered, his face still pressed in against Gale's shoulder.
"Hey, don't be sorry." Gale said softly, gently stroking his hand down along the length of his back, "You wanna talk about it?" He asked.
He shook his head, finally letting go of Gale so that he could lie back down on his pillow, "Not really." He admitted, wiping at his face. His fingers came away wet, and he couldn't help the embarrassment he felt at that.
It wasn't the first time that he'd woke up crying from the nightmares, but he couldn't help but feel embarrassed about it every time that it happened. He was a grown man, he should be well past waking up crying because he'd had a bad dream.
Gale didn't say anything in response to that, choosing instead to simply stroke his fingers through his hair, which he found himself almost grateful for.
It was rare that he did actually want to talk about the nightmares, but Gale had never pushed him into it. He'd simply listened if he had wanted to talk, but he'd accepted it if he didn't. It was something he had always appreciated from the younger man.
"It was the forest again." He eventually admitted, looking up at the ceiling.
He hadn't told Gale the full extent of what he'd gone through in the days before he'd been taken to the camp, but he had told him about the forest. He would have preferred not to say anything at all, but by the time he'd made it to the camp, the welt around his eye had faded to a nasty bruise, and his ribs had still been tender and sore. So, he'd told Gale that they'd been attacked by German civilians, and that he'd tried to make his escape once they'd been brought through the forest, but that was it.
He hadn't told him about the cart, or about the man that the German soldiers had killed with the shovel. He hadn't told him that he'd barely been able to see where he'd been going as he'd stumbled along, or that he'd almost hoped that he'd die from his injuries. He couldn't face the thought of seeing how that information would make Gale feel.
He was sure that Gale could tell that he was keeping something from him, but he'd never pushed him to tell him what had really happened out there. He appreciated that, because he really wasn't ready to talk about it. He didn't think he'd ever be, honestly.
Gale just nodded, gently stroking his hair back from his forehead, "You're safe here, I'll never let anything like that happen to you ever again."
He couldn't help the faint smile that crawled onto his face then, finally turning his head to look back at Gale, "I know." He said softly.
All throughout the war, he'd done his best to convince himself that he hadn't been affected by any of it. He'd slapped on a smile and had insisted he was fine, that he didn't feel a thing. The truth, though, was that he felt too much. It had been easy to push everything down in the moment. It was only once they'd gotten home that he realised just how badly he'd been coping with everything.
Being with Gale had definitely helped, despite the fact that it had taken them a while to get to this point.
After they'd gotten back to the States, he'd gone home to his house in Manitowoc, and had done his best to just.. acclimatise to being back home. It hadn't been easy, though. He wasn't close to his family, and he knew that none of his friends from back home would ever understand the kind of things he'd been through, and so he'd ended up isolating himself for the most part, attempting to deal with it all by himself.
It had only taken Gale three weeks to show up on his doorstep, with a suitcase full of clothes and an admission that he didn't know how long he was staying for.
He hadn't known it at the time, but he'd desperately needed that. He'd missed Gale with everything that he had, and he'd really underestimated how much he'd needed to spend some time with somebody who understood what it had been like. He and Gale had been with each other from the very beginning, though, and so he doubted there was anybody who would understand better.
What he had with Gale was already one of, if not the most important relationship in his life, and so by the time that he and Gale had fallen into bed together for the first time, he knew that he'd well and truly fallen in love with him.
Thankfully, Gale hadn't actually booked himself a return ticket home on the train, and so he'd just.. never left.
He'd never planned on Gale being a permanent fixture in his house, but God, he was so grateful that he was. It had taken them months to settle into this new found change in their relationship, and for Gale to slowly move his entire life from Casper, Wyoming to Manitowoc, Wisconsin, but he could honestly say now that he'd never been happier than he was now that he got to wake up next to Gale every morning.
Of course, it wasn't all smooth sailing. Outside of the walls of this house, they had to keep their relationship a secret. Officially, Gale had his own bedroom, and he was just a buddy that had wanted a change of scenery after the war. That second bedroom was very much just for show, though, since he and Gale slept in the same bed every night.
Aside from that, he knew that he wasn't the only one who was struggling.
Gale had never woken him up with nightmares, but he did get this faraway look in his eye sometimes, and he did tend to retreat in on himself. There were some evenings where he could barely get a word out of Gale, and so he'd simply curl up on the couch with him, reading his book while Gale sorted through whatever was going on in his head.
He'd never try to force him into talking about it, though, because Gale had always given him that same courtesy. He'd made it clear that he was here to listen if he did want to talk, but that it was okay if he didn't. He'd be here for him regardless, and he knew that Gale was there for him too.
It was exactly the way he wanted it to be.
"What time is it?" He asked, rubbing his face as he leaned up slightly to see the clock.
Gale shrugged, combing his fingers through his hair again, "It's early."
He dropped his head back against the pillow, looking up at Gale, "I'm sorry, you go back to sleep." He said.
Gale looked tired, and so he guessed that he'd probably been in a deep sleep when he'd been disturbed by his tossing and turning. He did feel guilty for that, because he knew that Gale didn't tend to sleep great at the best of times. More often than not, he'd fall asleep before Gale, and it wasn't unusual for him to wake in the middle of the night to find Gale with the lamp next to the bed switched on, reading his book.
"I'm alright." Gale insisted, giving him a small smile as he slid his arm over him to gently trail his fingers along his bare chest.
He just smiled back, taking Gale's hand in his own so that he could lift it to his lips, pressing a soft kiss to Gale's skin.
He could tell that it wasn't middle of the night early. The sun had come up long enough ago that the bedroom was washed in that golden morning light, and there was a faint breeze coming in through the window that they'd left open last night.
He liked this time of year, where it was warm enough to leave the window open at night. Being trapped in that prison camp for over a year had left him with a deadly hatred of the cold, and so he appreciated waking up in a warm bed more than he ever had before in his life. It helped that he had Gale there to wrap himself around, if he got cold during the night.
The cold was something that he didn't do all too well with these days, and he knew that Gale didn't either. They'd spent too long in that damn camp, huddling for warmth at night just so that they wouldn't freeze to death. It was something that he didn't particularly like to think about for too long.
"I think we should just stay here for a while longer." He suggested, leaving his fingers linked through Gale's as he let their hands rest on his chest again.
It was Sunday, neither of them had anywhere to be any time soon. Sure, they were both awake now, but he was warm and comfortable now that the initial panic from his dream had passed, and Gale was being soft and affectionate next to him, and so he had no complaints about spending the rest of the morning in bed.
Gale smiled, shrugging his shoulders, "I could be convinced."
"Oh, I've gotta convince you, do I?" He asked with a grin, sliding his hand around the back of Gale's neck to pull him down into a kiss.
He couldn't deny that he still felt a little bit rattled, but he knew that that would pass. Gale had always been the best distraction whenever he felt like this, though, and so he was more than happy to just lose himself in this for a little while; to focus on the feel of Gale's body against his own, on the way he'd kiss him that could make him forget even his own name at the best of times.
Thankfully, Gale went easily with it, bracing himself on his forearm as he leaned down over him to kiss him back.
This was something that he still couldn't quite believe that he got to have.
As much as he'd always known that Gale loved him, he'd always thought that it had been in nothing more than a platonic sense. He'd never imagined that their tight knit friendship would ever turn into something like this, but God.. he was so grateful that it had.
Towards the end, when the days had started to blend together in that prison camp, he'd really started to struggle with the reality of just how alone he actually was. The other guys had girls and families to go home to, and what did he have? He didn't have a girl waiting for him to come home, he didn't really speak to his family anymore, and so what the hell had he been fighting for? It wasn't an easy reality to deal with, even after he'd gotten to go home.
Before, he'd at least been surrounded by friendly faces. He'd managed to get through each day because he'd had the other guys, and they understood just how hard every day was. Once he'd gotten home, though, he'd realised just how alone he truly was.
As the days had gone on, he'd felt himself sliding further and further into depression; wanting to get out of bed and face the world less and less as the days had passed. Then Gale had showed up at his front door, and had changed everything for the better.
Maybe it was just because they'd been so close even before their relationship had turned romantic, but Gale had always been able to tell when he wasn't feeling the best. He'd never tried to force him into talking about it, but he'd always been there to provide a gentle touch and soft words, to remind him that he was safe and that he was loved, and that he was here for him.
That was all he'd wanted, just somebody to love him, somebody to choose him; and he got that in spades with Gale.
He draped his arms around Gale's neck, a soft noise spilling from his throat as he parted his lips to meet Gale's tongue with his own.
This was how he loved to spend Sunday mornings. Slow, lazy sex, focusing on nothing but the feeling of their bodies moving together. He'd always been a fan of sex being fun, being a little wild sometimes, but he'd never realised just how much he loved this slow, intense lovemaking too. Maybe that had a lot to do with Gale, though, and the fact that it meant so much more to him than just a meaningless one night stand.
"You wanna?" Gale asked, evidently reading his mind as he pulled back from the kiss just far enough to speak, although he gently nudged their noses together.
"Always." He whispered, leaning up to chase Gale's lips with his own.
He didn't think that he'd ever say no to that particular question. Given the choice, he'd spend the rest of his life in bed with Gale.
"You sure?"
"Yeah, and I want you to fuck me."
It was rare that they did it like that. It wasn't that they were dead set on doing it the other way, where he'd fuck Gale; he'd always just preferred to take the lead. He liked being the one in control, he liked to see just how good he could make Gale feel with just his hands, and his mouth, and his cock. They'd spoken about it shortly after they'd started sleeping together, and Gale had told him that he liked being on the receiving end, and so that was just what they naturally tended to fall into.
Still, sometimes he needed to give up that control. He needed to let Gale take the lead in order to ground him, to remind him that he was safe, that he was home, that he was loved. This morning was definitely one of those times, and so he wanted to just take it slow and easy, and to give himself over to the pleasure of being surrounded by Gale in every sense of the word.
Thankfully, Gale just nodded, leaning down to kiss him again as he moved over to cover his body with his own.
They were both already naked, having gone to bed like that last night, and he couldn't even begin to describe how good it felt to have Gale's naked body pressed against his own.
The bed was comfortable and warm underneath the covers from his and Gale's combined body heat. He could feel Gale smiling into it as they kissed, and he couldn't help the smile that crawled onto his own face in return.
Honestly, he could have stayed here in this bed for the rest of his life, relearning the taste and texture of Gale's mouth as though it wasn't something that he was already intimately familiar with.
Gale broke the kiss so that he could trail his lips down along the line of his throat instead, and so he dropped his head back against the pillow, smoothing his hands down the length of Gale's back as he did.
He and Gale had both since gained back the weight that they'd lost after spending over a year in that camp, but Gale was still lean and lithe, ropes of lean muscle laced under toned, golden skin. Given the choice, he would have spent the rest of his life doing this, memorising and worshipping every little detail of Gale's body with nothing but his touch; each freckle, each tiny scar.
Gale had come home from the war with scars that he hadn't had before, but so had they all, and so it wasn't a big deal to him. It broke his heart that some of those scars were on Gale's face, though, just because he knew that Gale hated the sight of them. More than once, he'd caught him examining them in the mirror, obviously attempting to steel his face into something neutral as he'd looked at himself. They didn't matter to him, though; Gale would always be the most gorgeous thing he'd ever seen, scars or no scars.
He was pulled back to the present moment by Gale gently nipping at the sensitive skin just underneath his jaw, soothing the mark he'd obviously left afterwards with a soft kiss.
Had they still been overseas, he knew that they couldn't have risked something like that. Now that they were home, though, it didn't matter if they left marks on each other. Honestly, he rather liked it; he liked looking in the mirror afterwards and seeing his neck and collarbone littered with faint marks. It was a solid reminder that he belonged to Gale.
"You want to turn over?" Gale asked, his breath warm against his skin as he continued to trail soft kisses along the length of his neck.
He shook his head, though, combing his fingers through the soft hair at the nape of Gale's neck, "No, I want it like this." He whispered.
Sometimes, he wanted it like that. He wanted to turn over onto his hands and knees and have Gale fuck him until he couldn't remember his own name. Not right now, though. Now, he wanted to be able to kiss Gale, he wanted to be able to wrap his arms around him to hold him close as they moved together.
Gale just nodded, drawing a soft noise from them both as he finally rocked their bodies together with a slow grind of his hips.
Christ, that was.. it was something he knew he'd never get used to.
Having Gale's body pressed against his own, knowing what was about to come; it was enough to have that faint undercurrent of pleasure running just underneath the surface, but it wasn't anything overwhelming just yet.
He leaned up to press his forehead against Gale's as they moved together, close enough to breathe the same air, although he didn't kiss him, "That feels so good, baby." He whispered, nudging his nose against Gale's.
Gale just smiled, cupping his jaw in his hand as he leaned down to press their lips together in a soft kiss, before reaching down between them to wrap his fingers around his cock.
He moaned softly, dropping his head back against the pillow again. God, the feeling of Gale touching him like this was something that he didn't think he'd ever get tired of.
They'd done this enough that they were well tuned to each others bodies by now. Gale knew exactly how to touch him in order to have him gasping and arching up against him. He knew all of the little tips and tricks that were guaranteed to wind him up and push him over the edge. It wasn't completely one sided, though; he knew just how to drive Gale crazy too, and it was something that he loved to do.
They just fit together when they were like this, and part of him believed that it was because he and Gale were meant to be together.
"So damn pretty like this." Gale whispered between kisses, "You've got no idea how much I want you, how good you make me feel."
He knew that Gale wasn't the biggest on dirty talk, or on talking in bed at all, but Gale had always seemed to know when he needed those reassurances. Sometimes he just needed to be reminded of the fact that he was wanted, and Gale had always found a way of making sure that he knew that.
He gasped as Gale twisted his wrist just right, arching up against him, "Probably about as much as I want you."
Gale huffed softly against his lips, before pulling back so that he could stretch over just far enough to reach the nightstand, where he knew that there was a small tin of Vaseline; which they kept in there for this.
"Condoms?" Gale asked, glancing back at him as he rummaged through the drawer.
He shook his head, pausing in where he'd been busy grazing his teeth over the muscled curve of Gale's shoulder, "No, I wanna feel you."
Sometimes they used condoms, and sometimes they didn't. It really just depended on the moment, and what they both wanted. Right now, he wanted nothing at all between them. He wanted to feel Gale, in every sense of the word.
Gale just nodded, retrieving the Vaseline, before coming back to him.
For a moment, they just kissed, and God.. even this meant so much to him. Being able to wrap himself in Gale like this, having the younger man tip his head up into the kiss as he delved his tongue into his mouth; it was something that he thanked his lucky stars for every damn day.
"Alright, hang on." Gale whispered, drawing back from him slightly.
He settled back against the pillow again as Gale turned his attention to the tin of Vaseline, quickly slicking his fingers. They'd done this enough that they didn't really have to talk about this part. Gale knew that he liked the preparation to be quick, but just thorough enough. He wanted to be able to really feel it.
Gale turned back to him after a moment, leaning down to press a quick kiss to the juncture of his shoulder as he settled between his legs, "Alright, relax for me, sweetheart." He whispered, before sliding a finger into him.
He moaned softly, letting his head fall back against the pillow again.
Getting to have this with Gale was something that he'd still barely managed to wrap his head around. All through flight school, all through being stationed at Thorpe Abbotts, all through being stuck in that Stalag, the one thing that had never changed was his feelings for Gale.
At first, he'd chalked it up to nothing more than a simple crush. On top of falling into a hard and fast friendship, he'd had such a huge amount of admiration for Gale as a pilot; and so he didn't stress too much over a harmless crush. It was only natural, right?
Still, it hadn't gone away, and he'd eventually had to face the fact that he'd developed real feelings for Gale. It didn't matter, though, he'd known that nothing could ever come of it, and so he hadn't spent too much time dwelling on it. It was just.. a part of him, something that he'd keep to himself.
He'd never imagined that his feelings for Gale would ever be reciprocated, and so he still had to pinch himself sometimes to convince himself that he wasn't dreaming. Sometimes, when he woke up in the mornings before Gale, he'd just turn over onto his side to watch the younger man sleeping, and think to himself how goddamn lucky he was that he got to have this.
Gale was quick and efficient as he worked him open on his fingers; first on one, and then a second, and then finally a third.
When they were doing it the other way around, when he was going to fuck Gale, he liked to take his time with this part. He liked to drag it out for as long as he could, to see just how good he could make Gale feel with only his fingers. He'd made him come once, just from doing this to him, and that was an experience that he knew he'd be thinking about for the rest of his life.
"Come on, I'm ready." He gasped, arching his back as Gale pressed his fingers deep again.
He didn't want to waste any more time, not when he knew what was coming next.
"You sure? I don't want to hurt you." Gale murmured, his touch raising goosebumps on his skin as he lightly skimmed his lips along his collarbone and over his shoulder.
He nodded, combing his fingers through Gale's hair, "Yeah, I need you." He whispered, before reaching down between them to wrap his fingers around Gale's cock, slowly stroking him.
He could hear the tension in Gale's voice as he spoke, and it felt so damn good to know that he wasn't the only one affected by this. He wanted Gale to be so turned on that he could barely think straight, that he was driven by instinct and desire rather than rational thought.
Gale moaned softly, letting his head hang for a moment, "You better stop that, or we're not gonna get anywhere here."
He chuckled, before leaning up to give Gale another soft kiss.
It was only another moment then as Gale pulled his fingers free, before reaching for the Vaseline again so that he could slick himself up.
He let himself settle back against the pillow, biting his lip gently as he just watched Gale.
The younger man was so goddamn beautiful like this. There was a flush high on his cheeks as he stroked himself, and his blonde hair was tousled from John running his fingers through it.
When they'd first started sleeping together, he'd been surprised at how self-conscious Gale could be when they were in bed. He knew he didn't have a whole lot of experience, but that didn't matter to him. Still, even reassuring Gale of that hadn't changed the fact that Gale had been nervous and unsure of himself the first few times that they'd done this.
He was so damn glad that that seemed to have faded the more they'd slept together.
He'd always been completely unashamed in his pleasure. He didn't have any reservations in doing something that he knew would feel good, or something that he knew would make Gale feel good. Gale hadn't seemed to share the same sentiment, though; he remembered almost feeling guilty for it whenever he'd do something as simply as laying back and just watching Gale, because of how self-conscious Gale would get.
Now, there didn't seem to be any shame in Gale as he stroked himself, closing his eyes as a soft moan spilled from his throat. It was something that he was so damn glad to see.
Gale settled back on top of him once he was satisfied that he was slick enough and ready to go, and so he hitched his legs up around Gale's hips, settling back against the pillow.
"Ready?" Gale asked, glancing up at him.
He nodded, gently combing his fingers through Gale's hair again, "Always." He insisted.
Gale just gave him a soft smile in return, bracing himself on his forearm as he reached down between them to guide his cock, before drawing a soft moan from them both as he finally began the slow push into his body.
Jesus Christ, nothing would ever feel as good as this did, and he still couldn't quite wrap his head around that.
Gale was the only man that he'd ever slept with, and he knew that he was the only man that he'd ever want to sleep with. He couldn't imagine ever letting another man do this to him - or any of the things that he and Gale did together, if he was being completely honest.
Still, Gale being a man wasn't this huge, life changing factor. He didn't consider himself queer, he didn't have any desires to start frequenting the spots that he knew men like that would secretly go to. It was just.. he loved Gale, and he was happy, and that was all there was to it.
Sure, there were things that they'd had to consider; they had to keep their relationship under wraps when they were in public, and it had definitely been something to figure out once sex had become a factor in their relationship. He knew that they'd never be able to get married, which did make him a little bit sad to think about, but he didn't consider it to be a deal breaker. Once he and Gale were both happy with the way things were, then what did it matter?
Gale stopped moving once he'd pushed as far as he could go, sighing as he let his head hang for a moment, "Jesus, John.." He whispered, closing his eyes.
"Come on, I need you." He gasped, pressing his fingers against Gale's lower back in an attempt to get him to move.
Gale had always done this. Once he was inside, he liked to keep still for as long as possible, letting him adjust to the feeling. Usually, that was fine, but sometimes he didn't want to waste any time in getting straight to it. This was one of those times.
Thankfully, Gale was obviously already feeling good enough that he didn't argue. He simply leaned down close to him as he stroked his fingers through his hair, finally starting to move with a slow roll of his hips.
He sighed, dropping his head back against the pillow as he looked up at Gale, letting his hands smooth up the length of Gale's back.
Like he'd said before, this was the kind of sex that he had a new found love for. Slow, lazy, intense, their faces inches from each other as they moved together. It was the kind of sex that he really needed sometimes, the kind that would ground him after he'd wake up shaking and disorientated after a nightmare.
It was hard to dwell on the nightmare when he felt so fully surrounded by Gale in every sense of the word. The warm weight of Gale moving on top of him and inside him, the feeling of his breath on his face as he leaned their foreheads together; it was exactly what he needed.
"That.. oh, fuck, you feel so good, baby." He whispered, hitching his legs up a little better around Gale's hips to keep him close as they moved together.
Gale just huffed softly, something warm in his eyes, before leaning down to kiss him again.
This was.. God, this was exactly why he'd wanted to do it this way, with him on his back and Gale on top of him.
He was all for having fun in bed, for trying out new things and new positions that they hadn't tried before. There was a lot to be said for that kind of sex, but hardly anything beat the feeling of this. Having Gale gently cup his face between his hands, their tongues slowly sliding together as they kissed, it was the kind of thing that made him fall a little bit more in love with Gale every time it happened.
The room was quiet except for the sounds of their heavy breathing as they moved together, and he leaned up slightly to keep his forehead pressed against Gale's after they'd broken the kiss, his eyes closed.
"God, I love you so much." He whispered, gasping as Gale rocked into him at a slightly different angle.
Gale sighed softly, "I love you too, darlin', more than you know." He whispered.
He wasn't sure that was true. Since they'd gotten together, Gale had always been completely open in his feelings for him, and so he knew just how deeply the younger man loved him. He felt exactly the same, though, and he hoped that Gale could see that in return. He'd never been great at talking about things, but even if he didn't talk about it, he made sure to show just how deeply and intensely he loved Gale with his whole heart.
Gale leaned back down to press his lips to his neck again, his fingers still in his hair as he grazed his teeth over the sensitive skin of his throat.
Sliding his own fingers up and into Gale's hair, he simply dropped his head back against the pillow again, his other hand sliding up the length of Gale's back to grip the back of his shoulder.
God, it felt so damn good to just wrap himself in Gale and let himself really feel it.
Gale's weight on top of him was grounding, and he could feel the way he was breathing heavily against his neck in between soft kisses and gentle bites. The way that Gale was rocking into him had that current of pleasure running just underneath the surface, but it was a gentle pleasure, rather than anything overwhelming. It was exactly what he'd needed.
"I'm close, sweetheart." He eventually whispered, turning his face in towards Gale's, letting himself breathe in the familiar scent of his hair.
He could tell that Gale was too. He was still moving languidly, but his rhythm was beginning to falter slightly; just enough that he'd noticed. He could feel the tension in his shoulders too, and the barely there way that he was trembling against him.
Gale nodded, his face still pressed in against the hollow of his shoulder, "Yeah, I- goddamn, so am I." He whispered, gasping softly, "You want me to pull out?"
"Don't even think about it." He huffed, a grin tugging at his lips at the raspy chuckle Gale let out in response.
Gale didn't say anything, but he shifted slightly in order to give himself a little bit more leverage, drawing a gasp from them both as he did. Like this, at this angle, Gale was hitting that spot inside him that made him see stars, and all he could do was hold on and let himself succumb to the pleasure.
He arched up against Gale, moaning as he pressed his fingers hard against the back of his shoulder again, "Please, Buck, I-" He trailed off, moaning again. He was right there on that edge, and he knew it wouldn't take much more to push him over.
"I know, I got you."
Gale reached down between them then so that he could wrap his fingers around his cock, slowly stroking him in time with his thrusts.
That was all it took, and he arched up against Gale with a soft moan, spilling between them.
That was.. God, it felt so unbelievably good. Sometimes, he was almost caught off guard by how intense and overwhelming the pleasure of his climax could feel, but this was different. It was like a gentle wave of pleasure washing over him, and it felt so goddamn good.
Through the pleasure, he vaguely registered Gale shuddering to a stop with a low moan, followed by that warm, wet feeling of Gale coming inside him.
Jesus Christ, that was something that he didn't think he'd ever get used to. Five years ago, he wouldn't have believed that he'd ever let another man do that to him; not even Gale, if he was being perfectly honest. Now, it was something that he loved. He loved the feeling of Gale marking him from the inside.
For a moment, the room was quiet except for the sounds of their quiet breathing, until he huffed softly as he combed his fingers through Gale's hair again, "You alive?"
Gale just mumbled something unintelligible, his face still pressed in against his neck.
He chuckled softly, before cupping Gale's face to lift his head, giving him a small smile, "Thank you." He whispered, leaning up to give him a quick kiss.
"For what?" Gale asked, leaning into his touch.
He shook his head, "Just.. for being here."
He meant that. No matter how tough things got, or how badly he felt that he was dealing with everything that had happened, he knew that he'd be okay once Gale was right here with him. He knew that Gale felt the same way, that he knew they'd be okay once they were together.
It was so much more than that, though. He was thanking Gale for getting him out of his head when he'd needed it, for loving him every day and reminding him that he wasn't alone. He couldn't even begin to say how grateful he was for all of that, and so he hoped that Gale could see it.
Gale just smiled at him, something softening in his face, before giving him another soft kiss.
"Stay there, I'm just gonna get a towel." Gale said once he'd pulled back from the kiss, before drawing a soft noise from them both as he slowly pulled out.
He folded his arm behind his head, a smile crawling onto his face as he watched Gale walking out to the bathroom. It was nice to see how comfortable Gale was around him, how unashamed of his nakedness he'd become with him. It was all he wanted, just for Gale to feel completely at ease around him.
Gale had obviously told him to stay where he was, but after not using a condom, he'd rather give himself a proper clean up before going back to bed. They could shower later, but he planned on staying in bed with Gale for at least another hour or so.
He dragged himself up and out of bed to follow Gale into the bathroom, finding the younger man cleaning himself down with a damp towel.
"I thought I told you to stay where you were?" Gale asked, a smile crawling onto his face as he caught his eye in the mirror.
He just shrugged, crossing the bathroom to wrap his arms around Gale from behind, "When have I ever done what I was told?"
"Don't I know it." Gale huffed.
For a moment, they just stood where they were. He pressed his cheek against Gale's shoulder, his arms still wrapped around his waist to hold him close. He could feel Gale gently stroking his forearm with his thumb, where he was holding onto him in return, and it was something that brought a smile to his face.
This was something that he loved. Those quiet moments where neither of them had to say anything, but still felt so full of love and affection. It was moments like this that made him so damn happy that Gale was here with him.
"You go back to bed, I won't be long." He eventually said, pressing a quick kiss to Gale's shoulder, before letting go of him.
"You've got five minutes." Gale teased, catching his hand to give his fingers a quick squeeze as he stepped away from him.
It didn't take him long to clean himself up, and he tossed the damp towel in the basket in the corner to be dealt with later. Before heading back to the bedroom, he couldn't help but stop for a moment to glance at himself in the mirror, admiring the faint mark just underneath his jaw.
Like he'd said before, he'd always had such a weak spot for that. He loved seeing the marks on himself and knowing that Gale had left them there. It felt like proof that he belonged to Gale.
He headed back into the bedroom then, giving Gale a smile as he slid back into the bed next to him. He was glad that they didn't have anywhere to be for the rest of the morning, because all he wanted nothing more than to tuck himself in against Gale and doze for the next hour or so.
Gale wrapped an arm around his shoulders once he curled close to him, and so he tucked his head in against Gale's shoulder, closing his eyes as he nestled in close, "Oh, you're so warm."
Gale chuckled softly, carding his fingers through his hair. For a while, they just laid there together, until Gale tilted his head slightly to look down at him, "Are you sure you're alright?" He asked.
He opened his eyes, looking back up at Gale, "I will be." He promised, giving him a small smile.
He was trying to get better at that. He was trying to be better at saying I will be okay, rather than simply insisting that everything was fine, when it so obviously wasn't. Gale had always been able to see straight through his bullshit anyway, so he knew there was no point in lying to him about it.
Gale smiled, and he could almost see the relief in his eyes at the fact that he was being honest with him. He didn't blame him for that, he knew that he'd spent far too long putting up walls where he hadn't needed to - even in front of Gale - and so he couldn't blame him for being relieved that he wasn't doing that now.
"I love you." Gale said softly, stroking his fingers through his hair again, "You know that, right? No matter what."
"Yeah, course I do. I love you too." He insisted.
That was all he needed; just to know that Gale loved him, no matter what. He could deal with anything else that life threw at him, once Gale was there with him to help him get through it.
He knew it wouldn't be the last time that he woke up with nightmares. It probably wouldn't even be the last time that he dreamt about that damn forest, and the pain he'd been in as he'd ran blindly from his captors. It was okay, though. He and Gale had both survived the war, and so once he had Gale to hold him through the nightmares and remind him that everything was okay, that they were okay, then he knew he'd be fine.
He closed his eyes as he tucked himself in against Gale again, smiling as Gale wrapped his arms around him in response, "How about we stay here for another couple of hours, and then I'll make breakfast when we get up?"
He wasn't sure he'd properly go back to sleep, but he was more than okay with just spending the rest of the morning dozing off like this. The bed was warm, Gale even warmer as he wrapped himself around him, his fingers tracing gentle patterns on his skin. It was where he felt happiest, and most at ease.
"Bacon and eggs?" Gale asked, tilting his head slightly to rest his cheek against the top of his head.
He smiled, huffing quietly under his breath, "Whatever you want, baby."