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You are still Shinichi Izumi, right?
Every single time Murano had asked him that, he’d smile — sometimes it was distant, other times it was genuine and rarely, it was tired — and respond, “Yeah, who else could I be?”
And now more than ever she wished, she pleaded, that he was telling the truth. No, it had to be the truth.
The day was pretty average to begin with. The blue sky was empty and the temperatures were slowly getting colder. Some of the trees in the school yard had turned a greenish brown, preparing for the approaching winter.
School life was beginning to feel normal again. Well, as normal as life at school could be when several people were murdered only a couple months ago. The fact that was almost normal to her was strange, and everyone else probably felt the same about that. “A traumatic event happened, but nearly everyone figured out a way to move on…or to act normal once again.” The monster that did all of it still lurked in her dreams.
Shinichi… well, to put it simply, had saved her life. “Somehow he walks away after jumping out of the building, with me in his arms. How is that even possible?” His excuse: he was pumped full of adrenaline. “If I got an anderlianline rush like him, I think I could be Superman for a couple minutes.” She decided not to pry further. Looking into it was pointless, and she had no real reason to. She should just be grateful that he was okay and there for her when she needed him the most.
Somehow, they had wound up dating. She couldn’t point to a single turning point for their relationship. There was no declaration of love — one day, Shinichi just asked her out. And after that, the atmosphere around him changed. He was kind, selfless and a little bit awkward at times…actually, a lot less awkward than he used to be. No longer did he look like a shy, timid boy, uncomfortable in even his own skin. Something inside Shinichi had changed, sometime around when his father got sick. “It’s kind of like he matured…but at that same time lost touch with some of his emotions.” Her mind flicked back to their date.
There was a moment. A brief second where some of his guarded emotions erupted to the surface. They were sitting on a park bench admiring the scenery. A mother walked past groceries in hand, her eyes weary, her pace slow and uneven. All signs of fatigue from dealing with the difficult child behind her. He was crying and wailing. Murano couldn’t help but feel a wave of second hand embarrassment for the mother.
“Mommy!!!! I’m tired!!! Mommy, wait!!!” The whines of the child made Murano cringe internally.
“Hey, c’mon…” The mum sighed.
“Mommy…you're stupid! Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!” the child wailed back.
The mother’s expression turned into a mix of sadness and anger. “Hey now, there’s no need to get ugly.”
“I hate you! I hate you! I wish you would die, Mommy! ”
“How could you say that?” The woman said in disbelief. Her child continued hurling insults at his mother. She dropped her groceries and knelt down to the child’s height. Her hand raised high above her head, poised to slap the child. Murano felt herself tense up, and she looked at Shinichi. His eyes were wide with terror.
After a tense few seconds, the woman gave a sigh of defeat, and picked up her bags. “C’mon let’s go.” The sobbing child reluctantly followed.
Murano turned to Shinichi, shocked to see him doubled over and wheezing. “A panic attack?!”
“Shinichi?! Are you okay?” She leaned forward trying to get a glimpse of his face.
“There’s…a hole” he squeezed out.
“A hole? What’s going on? Are you okay?” she asked, concerned for him.
And then just like a switch had been flicked, Shinichi’s breathing returned to normal. Quickly, he brought himself up. He wiped away the beads of sweat that had formed on his brow. “Sorry, I just had a little trouble breathing — maybe I am getting old,” he said with a smile.
“Oh, cut it out. Now you're just being pathetic, grandpa,” she teased.
He let out a chuckle at her joke. “But what was that? Was he hiding something from me?”
If only she’d gotten to know him better, before his father was injured in that accident, before he changed, then she could say with certainty, “You really are Shinichi Izumi.”
Fourth period was home economics. Shinichi and Murano’s class had paired up, much to her delight. When they were given the task of making a simple miso soup, she was overjoyed when the teacher let her and Shinichi partner up.
“I don’t really help out around the house all that much, so feel free to tell me what to do,” he said, his gloved hands looking out of place in the kitchen.
“That’s fine. I end up cooking a lot at home for my siblings, to help my parents out. I’d be more than happy to take you under my wing.”
“Wow, I really don’t know what I’d do without you, Murano.”
“Well for starters, someone wouldn’t pass home economics,” she commented, a subtle smile on her lips.
She gave Shinichi the simple task of thinly slicing the green onions whilst she worked on the tofu. Her mind couldn’t help but wander to a possible future, Shinichi helping her out in the kitchen. Together, a couple making a wonderful meal…it was the kind of sweet romance that made her cheeks a light shade of pink.
Shinichi’s knife sounded like a machine gun clacking against the cutting board. Murano was taken back by the speed and precision at which he handled the blade.
“Slow down, there's no need to rush,” she gently prompted, watching his left hand turn into blur as he began to slice on the second green onion.
“Relax, I’ve got everything under control,” he said reassuringly.
“Sure…you know, for someone who doesn’t help out at home, you certainly know your way around that knife.”
“I—I guess you could say that,” Shinichi responded quickly. Murano watched puzzled as his expression became more forced. She was about to turn away and resume cutting her own ingredients when she glanced at his cutting board. A strange red liquid had stained some of the green onion slices. Her eyes raced to his right hand — sure enough, there was a fresh cut.
“Shinichi! Your right hand! I told you you should’ve slowed down,” Murano said, the worry in her voice evident.
Shinichi turned away sheepishly, trying to hide the wound. “Oh that? I barely even realized I cut myself. It should be fine.”
Murano wasn’t listening. “Ah, ah. Let me see.” Her soft gaze hardened into a more serious expression.
“Seriously, it’s nothing…” Shinichi sighed as he reluctantly held out his hand. Murano, with a touch as light as a feather, took it, peering at the wound.
“Shinichi, that’s quite deep. I hope you weren’t trying to impress me,” she muttered.
“I wasn’t.”
“I’ll let the teacher know, then I’ll take you to the infirmary myself.”
“Murano, don’t you think you’re overreacting —”
She glared at him.
“On second thought, this is perfectly reasonable,” he quickly corrected himself.
Satisfied with his answer, she quickly told the teacher and then they both headed for the infirmary.
As they walked, Murano struck up a conversation. “Why are you always so… selfless? It’s almost like you don’t want to be cared about.”
“Just my nature, I guess.”
“But still, if you're going to be an idiot and end up hurting yourself, at least admit it and let me help you.” The sentence sounded more like a plea than a mere comment.
“But most of the time it’s nothing; I don’t want you worrying about me for no good reason,” he reasoned.
“Shinichi, I worry about you because you never tell me about all the times it was nothing.”
“I...just don’t see the need to worry you.”
“I think I'd feel far less worried if I knew what all this nothing was.”
“Yeah…”
The two fell into silence. “He’s hiding something. All this nothing, it’s something so much more…but he’s just too stubborn.” Despite the overwhelming urge to uncover what all the nothing was, she doubted she’d get far. Shinichi would just tell her not to worry. Murano slowly began to suspect those words were his way of saying, “I don’t want to talk about it.” Of course, he tried to calm her down by telling her not to worry, but that’s all she could do when he wouldn't let her in.
When they arrived at the infirmary, there was no nurse. Murano sighed. “Go sit down on the bed, I’ll go grab bandaids and disinfectant.”
Shinichi nodded and obeyed her command. As she rummaged through the cabinets in search of the supplies, she could’ve sworn she heard him whispering to someone, but when she returned he was alone. “Was he talking aloud?” Everyone spoke to themselves, so it wasnt out of the ordinary, but with how guarded Shinichi was, it seemed to go against himself to vocalise his thoughts.
“Hold out your hand.” Shinichi gave her his right hand. Murano got to work cleaning up all the dried blood around the cut. Shinichi seemed oddly tense.
“You okay, you look a little tense?” “ Was he nervous?”
“Sorry, I’m fine.”
“Really?” She raised an eyebrow.
“Just a little nervous, that’s all.”
“Nervous? What’s there to be nervous about?”
“I…I heard that disinfecting a wound like this really stings.”
“Seriously? The great Shinichi Izumi fears a little disinfectant.” She couldn’t help but smile. At least that part of him was still intact. “I think it's a good lesson — to be more careful with that knife.”
“Y-yeah.” He chuckled.
“Okay, deep breath. I’ll do it on the count of three.”
He took a deep breath.
“One…” She sprayed the bottle of disinfectant immediately.
“Ow.. ow. What happened to the three?” He winced slightly in pain. Murano looked puzzled. “You okay?” Shinichi asked.
“Yeah, I just could’ve sworn I heard another voice say ow.” She examined his hand more closely looking for an explanation.
“Oh? You probably just imagined it.” Shinichi laughed, but it felt forced.
“Mhm, probably.”
Murano continued with her treatment, removing a bandaid from its packaging. “If I told you needed stitches, would you get them?”
“I uhm…no,” Shinichi admitted, a small look of guilt on his face.
“Okay then, tough guy,” she said, clearly unamused. She removed the pieces of paper on the sticky part of the bandaid. She then carefully placed the bandaid over his wound. Much to her frustration, half of the adhesive end of the bandaid insisted on clinging to her fingers. She groaned in frustration. Her end of the bandaid only became more crinkled the more she tried to fix it. “Sorry, I stuffed up.”
“No, no, it’s fine. Don’t worry about it,” he attempted to reassure her.
“I’ll just take this one off and get another one.” With a decisive pull, she ripped the bandaid off his skin. She was about to discard the bandaid when something caught her eye. A couple of small hairs had been ripped out of his hand. At first she thought her eyes were deceiving her, so she blinked, but sure enough, the hairs seemed to writhe and wiggle almost like they were alive . Instantly her mind raced to that new greeting along with that urban myth that popped up after the whole monster attack. “Pull a person’s hair out, if it wiggles they’re a monster!”
“N-no way…” she whispered, stunned.
Shinichi caught her staring at the bandaid. “Murano, you look like you’ve seen a ghost?” He rose to his feet and walked to her side. Murano stumbled back.
“Could he be a monster? I mean, the kid that attacked the school looked exactly like a student before…”
“S-stay back.” Her voice had barely any power behind it.
Shinichi froze and frowned. “Murano, what’s going on?”
“Y-you need to explain. Are you really Shinichi Izumi?”
“Yeah, who else could I be?” he said, slightly confused.
“Liar! You're a m-monster like Hideo Shimada a-aren’t you!” she stammered. Her heart pounded in her chest as her eyes went wide with terror.
“Murano, it’s really me. How about we just take a couple of deep —” His soothing words did anything but put her at ease.
“Oh, for god’s sake! Your right hand has hairs that wiggle, l-l-like little worms.” She was shaking now. “Is it…going to kill me? Like Hideo?” Vivid images of corridors filled with blood flashed across her mind.
She attempted to back away from the monster in front of her, but she tripped over her own feet.
Her eyes widened further as Shinichi’s right hand morphed? His fingers disappeared and merged into one mass. Two razor sharp blades sprouted like arms on either side of his hand. A single green eye grew on a tentacle, followed by a mouth where his palm should be.
“Shinichi, she knows of my existence,” the monster spoke.
“This is how I die! T-this is why he was acting so strange, b-because he’s been a monster all this time!” She screamed. The monster raced forward, its blades rushingtowards her neck!
“Migi!” Shinichi shouted as he jumped backwards away from Murano. Thrown off by his erratic movements, the monster’s blades just barely missed.
“Migi, we’re not killing her, for fuck’s sake!” he yelled, grabbing the long tentacle with his left hand and yanking it back.
“She poses a risk to our safety. If she tells others of our existence…well, you know what happens.” The monster’s eye snaked towards her face like a tentacle, examining her. Murano wanted to scream, but her ragged breathing left her speechless.
“Migi, maybe if you didn’t try to kill her, things would’ve gone a little more smoothly.”
“Perhaps my reaction was unwarranted, however, I did receive a wound whilst I was asleep.”
“Sorry, that was my fault.”
“Shinichi,” the monster, Migi, cautioned, its eye tendril retracting back to glare at him suspiciously.
“Relax, I wasn’t trying to cut you off,” Shinichi huffed. The monster morphed its blades back into harmless pieces of skin.
“W-what’s going on, Shinichi?” Murano said, finding her voice. It was barely louder than a whisper. “A-are you a monster? Am I going to die?” She choked on her last few words. A couple of tears welled up in her eyes.
“Murano…I know this is probably crazy, but if you let me —”
“Us,” corrected Migi.
“Fine. Us explain, it’ll probably make a lot more sense.”
“I-I’m not going to die?” She shivered.
“No, of course not,” Shinichi reassured her.
“Unless you pose a threat to us,” Migi countered.
“Migi, seriously, are you trying to scare her to death?” Shinichi hissed at his hand, irritated.
“What? I’m merely trying to assure our safety,” Migi reasoned, clueless to the error in its ways.
“By threatening her.”
“I don’t see the issue of that.” Its green eye stared blankly at him.
Shinichi sighed with frustration. “Yeah, of course you don’t.”
Slowly, Shinichi approached Murano, offering her a hand “Here.” A little less scared, she took it and he helped her up. Tremors still ran through her body, so he offered her a seat on the bed.
She sat on one end, and Shinichi and Migi sat on the other. Murano was still very wary of the fact that Migi had been mere moments away from killing her. A million questions bounced around her head.
“So, I guess I should probably explain…us.”
“Y-yeah.” A nervous chuckle burst out of her, all in an attempt to calm her nerves. It ended up making the whole situation even more awkward.
“Where to start, ahhh, man. It was a while ago…”
Shinichi began to explain how Migi failed to enter his brain and wound up becoming his right arm, sometime in the beginning of the high school year. Slowly, Murano started to relax. Shinichi was still mostly human — except for his right hand of course — he wasn’t some monster like Hideo. Just the thought of his name sent chills down her spine.
He was still Shinichi Izumi…but something still felt off. The biggest secret he had kept hidden from everyone had just been revealed to her unexpectedly and yet, he was still composed. Some might say he was just level-headed, but Murano seriously doubted that any high schoolers had this kind of mental stability. They were still kids after all. It was unnatural.
“So, yeah. That’s pretty much how we became partners.” Shinichi said, finishing up his brief explanation. Migi, or his right hand, had sat in silence, merely observing the conversation. It kept one eye on her and another on Shinichi.
“I have a question for you, Migi.” Murano’s voice, much to her relief, didn’t waver nearly as much as before. Anyone would relax if they knew their life wasn’t about to be taken from them.
“Proceed.”
“Why don’t you kill humans, like Hideo?”
“My kind kills humans for nutrition; we’re cannibalistic in nature. However, I get all the nutrition and vitamins I require from Shinichi’s bloodstream, so I have no desire to feast on humans. I only kill beings that pose a threat to my existence. I believe humans would call that self-defense.”
“Oh…I guess that makes sense.” She was a little unnerved by how analytical and lifeless Migi sounded…it reminded her of how Shinichi acted sometimes. An old memory resurfaced, from the first day of high school — back when Shinichi was acting really weird.
She narrowed her eyes in suspicion, not at Shinichi but at his right hand. “So if you were around at that start of the year, then that means…you were the one who groped me!”
Migi’s eye tendril turned away, avoiding her glare. “I do not recall such events occurring.”
Murano’s face flushed red with embarrassment and anger.
“Y-you still remember that?” Shinichi said, surprised, face ever so slightly tinged red.
“Of course I would! Who wouldn’t?” she cried out. She decided to give the parasyte a little piece of her mind. “Don’t you have any respect for others? Even worse, you made me slap Shinichi for something you did! Now, how is that fair?” she said, leaning forward towards Migi.
“Murano, please calm down, I’ll even apologise again on behalf of Migi.” Shinichi offered, trying to de-escalate the whole situation.
“I was merely curious about the anatomy of the opposite sex,” Migi responded in his lifeless tone.
“Migi…just why are you like this?” Shinichi groaned as he buried face in his left hand.
“Well, at least one of you is sorry,” Murano huffed.
“I am seriously sorry for letting him do that; it was wrong.”
“It’s fine. I just hope Migi has learnt his lesson.”
“I have no concept of human morals and ethics, and I don’t see the point in rights and wrongs; I merely act on what guarantees my survival,” Migi chimed in.
Shinichi, the frustration evident on his face, quickly added, “Which is why we act as a team. So at least then one of us has a moral code.”
Murano fell back into a silence.
“This must be a lot to take in,” Shinchi said.
“Yeah, no kidding,” She chuckled, this time it was more of a natural laugh. “I found out what he was hiding, and it explains a lot… But still, I can’t help but feel there’s still something he’s not telling me.” She stared at Shinichi’s eyes.
Never in a million years would she have guessed he had a literal parasyte in his right hand. After a brief moment of consideration, she concluded she’d probably go mad if she never found exactly what he was still hiding from her. “It doesn’t feel great to admit, but him keeping Migi a secret from me – it was tearing us apart.” Now that Murano knew, it made sense why he never told her despite desperately wanting too. “ But at the time it felt like he couldn’t trust me, to open and to be vulnerable with me.” She gathered from Migi’s initial reaction that he wasn’t too fond of others learning about his existence. It was for her safety, not his. So she mustered all of her courage and spoke up.
“Shinichi…you’ve changed. I don’t know when exactly it happened, but it was sometime around when your father got hurt. You’ve never been the same since then…it’s like you’ve forgotten how to cry, be happy…to be human.”
Shinichi's eyes dilated. A small reaction, but she caught it. He was scared. Shinichi froze. His eyes seemed to shimmer…almost like he was remembering something traumatic.
Migi’s eye examined him, before turning to face her. “Since this might be hard for Shinichi, I’ll explain on his behalf.”
Shinichi looked like he wanted to speak up. His mouth hung open in silence only to shut again.
“Whilst on vacation…Shinichi’s mother was attacked and assimilated by a parasyte.”
Murano’s mind blanched. “A parasyte…?” she spoke, breathless.
“Indeed. A rather unfortunate situation for Shinichi. The parasyte was then able to use its appearance as Shinichi’s mother as emotional leverage…” Migi paused as he pondered what words to use. “Shinichi ultimately decided to protect the parasyte posing as his mother by using a knife to prevent me from defending him. A decision which cost him dearly.”
“His own mother — a parayste.” She couldn’t even begin to grasp just how traumatic that would’ve been. Hideo was a monster, a ruthless killing machine. Imagine if a monster stole the face of your own mother and then tried to kill you.
“He sustained fatal damage to his heart. In order to save his life, the only option I had was to act as his new heart. In the process, I lost roughly 30% of my original cells. They fused with his bloodstream, resulting in several improvements to his physical and mental capabilities. One of them being his ability to calm down and control his mood quite well.” Migi explained, almost like he was impressed about Shinichi’s newfound abilities.
Murano’s mind was cast back to that fateful afternoon she bumped into Shinichi. He’d missed school the last couple of days. When she saw him, she let out a gasp. He’d lost an alarming amount of weight, making him deathly thin. His skin was as pale as a ghost. He looked like he’d been standing on death’s doorstep. And now she knew why.
Murano glanced back at Shinichi. A look of terror was stricken across his face and his breathing was erratic. Just like before on their date.
“There’s a hole…” The meaning behind those words clicked into place for Murano. There was a literal hole in his heart. It was just all so horrible. She couldn’t imagine anything worse happening to anybody. She doubted any silly words of comfort would help, and she questioned if even she could find the right ones. So she did the next best thing.
She shuffled close to him, pulling him into a hug. “I’m so sorry, I had no idea what you were going through,” she whispered into his ear.
First she felt him start to shiver. Then finally, after so long, she heard sobs along with the release of salty tears. Shinichi Izumi was still human. The tightness in her chest finally undid itself. Tears of joy and sadness welled up in her eyes as she pulled him closer “You really are Shinichi Izumi.”