Chapter Text
You wake up to the sound of seagulls squawking, and the gentle crashes of calm waves. You’re laying in the sand, shaded by an umbrella. Mira is next to you, too engrossed in her book to notice that you’ve woken up. Odile is similar, but chooses not to acknowledge you. The sounds of laughter make you turn your head over to the shore, where Bonnie and Nille are taking turns splashing Isabeau.
That poor man. You can’t help but chuckle quietly. It’s peaceful.
You arrived in Bambouche 2 weeks ago, and already, your party is adjusting. After an emotional reunion with Nille, you all decided that you would stay here for a bit. It would probably do good for all of you to be in one place for a while. To see all that it has to offer. And stars know that Bonnie could use some stability.
You could probably deal with some too. Some time to… compress everything. Break it down and bleh- talk about your… everything. You don’t want to, despite promising to communicate. But avoiding your problems isn’t going to make them disappear. It’s just going to make them fester. And you’d rather not get stuck in another time loop because you didn’t talk about your feelings again.
So, you’re in Bambouche! For an undecided amount of time. You have a feeling everyone will start heading out when Bonnie starts complaining, anyways. Besides, Nille already said yes to traveling with you all, so all you really need to do then is pick a location to go to.
But for now, all you have to worry about is relaxing. And talking. Still worried about talking. But at least you have your friends with you, so it isn’t too bad. You place your focus back to everything around you. The salty sea breeze. The gentle rhythmic waves. The burning sun-kissed sand. You breathe in… and out… Everything is peaceful. Isa still seems to be getting assaulted with seawater. You laugh, before standing up to go help him. You step forward.
Except… you don’t make it to him…
You take a few steps… and the world starts to spin. You feel a pain on your knees and burning on your hands as you hit the hot sand below. Your head pounds in dizzying pain and you hear the concerned shouts of familiar voices. You fall to your side, your good eye looking upwards at blurred faces… before everything goes dark...
~
You wake up slowly, your eyes adjusting to the dim lights before opening. From what you can gather from the windows, it’s evening. Probably around dinnertime even. You’re laying in the bed you and Isa have been sharing, wrapped up in a blanket. There’s a pile of more blankets at the end, as if someone wanted to place more on you but was told no.
You… passed out? How did you get here?
As if on cue, Isabeau enters the room.
“Oh! Sif, you’re up!” he quickly crosses the room towards you, careful to not spill the bowl of… something, with a smile on his face, “Are you feeling better?”
“Um… yes? I- I mean… I don’t know how I was feeling earlier? What… what happened?” You tilt your head. He sits down on the bed and places the bowl of… soup! In your hands, motioning you to eat. You let it cool before taking a bite.
…
Potatoes. He chuckles a bit at your expression.
“Yeah, Bonbon put those in there ‘cus they were mad you didn’t tell us you were sick,” he explains, “But uh… You passed out earlier. Out of nowhere. Are you okay? You didn’t get overheated did you? Heatstroke is dangerous, you know?”
He gently places a hand to your forehead. Warm… You feel fine. You were wearing your cloak so you couldn’t have overheated. You had just woken up from a nap so you couldn’t have been tired. Though, you have been having trouble with sleep ever since the loops, even with Isa being there, so you could have just gotten less sleep than you thought.
“I feel fine.”
“Sif…”
“I mean it,” You reassure, “Maybe I was just tired still. You know how hard it is to sleep sometimes now. I don’t know. I just hope this doesn’t become a regular thing.”
“Well, we’ll be there to catch you when you randomly faint next time. Most of the time. After this, I swear,” he smiles apologetically. You laugh, before getting a fun idea. You don’t remember the exact wording but...
“Okay Mr. Buff and Heroic Isabeau. You can catch me like a fair maiden,” You tease, and he stutters and stumbles and flushes and it’s cute. He hides his face in his hands, but you can hear his laugh loud and clear.
“I’m gonna tell Bonbon to put extra potatoes in your next meal.”
“Noooo!”
~
The rest of the night is smooth. It’s great, in fact! You feel great! More… solid? You guess? If that makes sense. Like your mind isn’t made out of a bunch of holes anymore... That makes even less sense. Welp! It doesn’t matter, you guess. What does matter is your family in front of you. You’re all together at Nille and Bonnie’s table, eating the soup they made. You felt good after your first bowl, so you decided to join everyone else. Bonnie gave you a lecture about communicating and saying when you’re sick, to which you tried to repeat what you said to Isa, with little to no avail. Mira offered to heal you if you felt off again, and Odile teased you for really being able to sleep anywhere. You laugh.
After dinner, you all begin to tuck in for the night. Your head feels clear for once. Not in the “forgotten everything you ever loved” way, but instead the “like a fresh rainy day with clear air” way. Like you’re not worried about anything right now. It’s nice. You hope it stays.
You’re getting ready for bed when you slip off your cloak and fold it neatly on top of your bag. You check it for any stains from dinner. You don’t have your hat anymore, so you make sure to take care of it. You know you can be a messy eater sometimes. You don’t want it to get dirty. The room you’re sharing with Isa is actually a guest room. Pétronille offered Odile to sleep in her room while she shared with Bonnie. Though, both her and Bonnie ended up camping out in the living room with Mira to “make it fair.”
You and Isa would’ve joined, but they banned you two from their secret book club. They also teased you about how they don’t want to interrupt your “Smoochy time with Isa,” as Bonnie put it. You don’t want to comment about how dark your face got. But, at least the two of you were sharing again, which is nice.
You finish changing into your night clothes when you hear Isa knocking to come in. You tell him he can and he joins you in the room. You both climb into bed, cuddled next to the other before wishing goodnight. Today was eventful. A little stressful, for the others at least. Which you tried to apologize for if it weren’t for the others saying it was fine, especially since it was accidental. But still. You hope to make it up to them tomorrow. Maybe you can carve something as a gift? You already made Odile something, so maybe someone else? Isa? Or Bonnie for making that soup? Pétronille for letting you stay
You’ll decide tomorrow. You’ll go into town or the forest nearby to get a piece of wood and pick randomly. And you can carve the rest when you start to travel again. Though, that’s not for a while. Bonnie still has so much to show you of Bambouche. It’s exciting, getting to see where they grew up- or well, are still growing up. Maybe you can show everyone where you grew up, too. One day.
After all, Stellarine is right next to Bambouche.
You shift closer to Isa, and begin to drift to sleep.
~
You buy a nice piece of wood from the market the next day. It’s sunny again, the same as it was yesterday, except with less clouds. The others are still busy at the market, so you decide to find a nice spot outside to start carving. It’s a little ways away from the beach, being slightly secluded by some trees. The docks seemed busy for some reason, so you want to avoid all of the commotion. Odile joins you soon after, commenting about how you move so quietly now that even she didn’t notice this time. You apologize sheepishly, which she waves off.
You already made her something, so you don’t have to worry about ruining the surprise. You decided to make a mini Isa. And okay, you can hear the teasing already, but hey. You like Isa…….
That’s really the only reason for why he’s first.
The others join you throughout the day, creating a similar scene to yesterday. Though, this time Isa’s not getting assaulted with water, and is instead perfectly distracted building sand castles with Bonnie. You smile. The carving for Odile took about a week, but that was when you were on the road. This shouldn’t take more than a few days, you think. Now that you’re staying here for a bit, at least.
You’ve always loved carving, you think. There’s something about it that’s so peaceful. Watching something come to life with nothing but a knife and your hands. And it’s so much easier to get materials for. You remember when you were a kid, when you would help your baba cut firewood, they would let you pick one out for them to make a toy out of. You remember them carefully teaching you how to carve, stressing to you how important it is to pay attention to where you’re cutting. It was less stressful than sewing was. You always had trouble figuring out patterns and stitches. Even when she was making your cloak and trying to teach you, you couldn’t wrap your head around it. You’re not good at fashion like her or Isa. Your mom would like him.
“Siffrin,” Mira calls. You turn to her smiling, “I haven’t asked you how you are today! I was going to a bit ago, but you seemed so focused. How are you feeling?”
“Good! Great even!” You don’t even have to lie this time. You genuinely feel good for once. You feel comfortable in your own skin. She sighs in relief.
"I’m glad to hear!” She beams, before looking at your project, “What are you making?
You blush, before nodding towards Isa in a silent confession. She seems to understand and stifles a small giggle.
“I just hope he likes it.”
“The man looks at you like you’re the Change god themself. He’ll like it. Siffrin,” Odile smirks without even looking up from her book. You hum.
“I’ve been trying to get better without Wishcraft though,” You admit.
“You said the mumbling you do when carving is a ritual right?” Odile asks. You nod. “Well, I’m sorry to let you know this, but that one’s going to be a hard habit to break. Considering you’ve been mumbling to yourself. This whole time.”
Stars. You deadpan, before grumbling to yourself and going back to carving with a pout. Odile laughs slightly.
“I wish I could remember some of my baba’s carving lessons better,” You mumble absentmindedly. You don’t even notice the way they stiffen, the look they give you, full of surprise and concern. But you continue to ramble obliviously, ”They were the one to teach me how to carve, you know. I think I took more after them than my mom with creative stuff. I could never get a grasp on sewing. I think she would like Isa.”
“Your mom liked to sew?” Mira asks cautiously.
“Yeah! She made my cloak! Isa looked at it once… back in the House… Um, she spoke some Wishcraft into the stitches so that it would grow with me, and make sure I wouldn’t get too hot or cold wearing it,” You explain, attention still on the piece of wood, “My baba though, they were really good at carving. Even without Wishcraft. They would make me toys out of leftover firewood.”
“Aw!” Mira coos. Odile still has a concerned look in her eye, tinged with a layer of skepticism. She lowered her book a while ago, placing her sole focus on you.
“Siffrin, I apologize but… I thought you couldn’t remember your parents?” She asks, and… you think….. You think….. and it doesn’t hurt.
Your… parents.
Your…. parents…?
Your parents! Your parents! You-
Your mom! You try to picture her- Long darkless hair, long dress, star-shaped jewelry. Your baba! Darker skin, kinky hair, a hat- your hat! They gave it to you! Your cloak as well! She made it for you herself! She was a seamstress and they were a fisherman! Your family had a boat and a house near the beach and and and-
It’s here! You dig deeper into your memory and recall things from long ago- echoes of the past finally being heard by your brain. It’s here! It’s blurred and fuzzy but it’s all here and it’s not going away this time! It’s here and it doesn’t hurt! You remember! You remember you remember you remember!!!! It’s here!
You want to sob and scream in joy and sigh in relief, but all you can manage is staring blankly at your friends. You don’t know what to say. You don’t know what to do. Normally you’re forgetting things. You don’t know what to do when you remember.
“I remember,” is what you settle on, breathlessly, as if you’ll forget if you acknowledge it, “I- I remember my parents, and- and my home my-“
You let out a sharp gasp. Your home- Your home! It’s-
“STELLARINE!!!” You shout so loud that the others look your way. Your eye tears up as theirs’ begin to widen. Isabeau and Nille look at you confused.
“Isn’t that the name of…“ Isa trails off.
“The island north of Vaugarde,” Odile sighs.
“The one that’s right next to Bambouche,” Nille adds, looking away towards where the ocean would be. “Does this have something to do with the rumor?”
“What? What rumor!?” You ask, a little desperate if you’re honest. She looks at you with something akin to pity.
“I overheard a few people talking about some discovery they made. About an island that disappeared long ago reappearing,” she tries to recount, “I thought I just misheard them, but if we remember now-”
You don’t even stick around to hear the rest of what she has to say before you’re running off. You hear your friends calling for you, yelling at you to come back or to wait, but you can’t. You can’t wait. You need to see it. You need to see if it’s here- with your own eye. It needs to be- It MUST be. Why else would the docks be crowded!?
You make your way to the docks and worm your way through the crowd of people. Normally, something like this would be too much, too overstimulating. But you don’t care right now!!!! You need to know!!!!! You make it towards the front and-
And you look.
You look.
And find an island in the distance. Your island. Your home.
It’s here. It’s here.
Your legs shake. You fall to your knees, eye glued to that place in the distance. You can’t look away. You can’t let it disappear from you again. This has to be a dream, a cruel twist from the play that is your life. You pray to the Universe that it isn’t the case, that it’s real. It’s here. Your home is back and so is your memory and you want to cry.
You can’t hold it back any longer. The tears in your eye begin to fall. One tear, two, until it’s too much to hold back. You sob and gasp for air as years of longing and begging and wishing are let out. Years of desperation to know who you are, to know where you came from, have come to fruition.
You jump when you feel a touch on your shoulder. There’s someone in front of you. They’re talking to you, calling your name, but all you could focus on is the island. You barely register what is happening. You can’t do anything but cry. They hug you, and you melt into their hold. Strong, warm, comfy. Isa...
You let him hold you as you cry. He says something, you barely understand what it is. A question, you think. You nod, and he picks you up. You let out a squeak that you’re sure he heard but you couldn’t care less to be embarrassed about. You hold on to him as he carries you out of the crowd and farther away.
Out of the corner of your eye, you see the rest of your party. You take a hand away from holding Isa to wipe your face, erasing whatever tears remained. You take a few breaths to quell your racing heart. You didn’t even notice how worked up you got. You take a breath, and focus on your surroundings.
Isa takes you to the others on the outskirts of the crowd.
“Hey Sif, you back with us?” He prods gently. You sniff, and try to speak, but find no words coming out of your mouth. You nod, instead.
“Do you think you can walk?” He asks. You nod again. He sets you down, but as soon as your feet touch the ground, your knees buckle and send you falling. He catches you, and you settle on leaning heavily onto him for support. Your legs are still shaky. Your eye is still red and crying, tears falling without your consent. You glance at the others. They’re looking at you with concern.
“Siffrin,” Odile starts, “Can you please explain to us why you decided to run off?”
“Madame, I don’t think-“
“It’s here,” You mumble, cutting Isa off. They look at you, confused. “The island. The island north of Vaugarde. Stellarine. It’s here.”
They freeze, taking in what you said. Odile looks over the group of people. Over all of the excited sailors and curious townsfolk, and finds what you’ve been looking for for so long.
“My home it’s- It’s right there! It’s back! I- I can finally go home!!” Your breath hitches as you realize something. You hate being selfish. You hate asking for things but... “Um… do you think we can… I mean- when we start traveling again I don’t want to rush our time in Bambouche but when we get back on the road do you think we-“
“Yes, Siffrin, we can go to Stellarine,” Odile interrupts you, “And before you say anything, I can already tell what you’re thinking. No, you are not selfish for wanting to go home and yes, we want to go with you. It’s an island that disappeared for over a decade, for gems sake. Who wouldn’t be curious?”
“Yeah! We want to see where you grew up! And now that you got your memory back, you can tell us all about it!” Isa encouraged, jostling you around a bit. The others seem to brighten up at the idea.
“How wonderful! I’d love to see something other than Vaugarde for a change!” Mira claps her hands together.
“This seems like a good starting point for traveling. It’s basically next door, anyway,” Nille adds. Bonnie seems to vibrate next to her with how excited they are.
“Yeah! Mystery island!!! What are we waiting for!!! LETS GOOO!!!!!” Bonnie yells, before running in the direction of their house.
“Bonnie!” She chases after them. You and the others laugh at your kid’s antics.
“Guess we’re headed to Stellarine then,” Odile smiles at you, “Obviously, there’s a lot more planning we need to do, but for the most part, Boniface seems eager to go, so we might as well start figuring it out later tonight.”
You hum in acknowledgement. That sounds like a good plan. You and the others decide to go back to where you were before. You take one last look up north. Home.
You can’t wait.