Chapter Text
Chilchuck had no idea how much time had passed. He only knew that the night outside was dark, the air in the room hot and humid and his own skin slick with sweat where Laios' grabbed him to flip him over. One large, calloused hand supported his hip, pulling him up and back to where that cock sank into him again. Slick and deep. Chilchuck groaned, fisting the sheets between his fingers and biting into the fabric.
They must have been at it for hours. Chilchuck's entire body was aching, muscles straining, nearly unable to keep himself up anymore. Not that he had to. Somewhere along the way he had allowed Laios to take over, trusting his lover to handle him with the same care and efficiency he always used when they fucked. Pushing and pulling him into position as soon as Chilchuck's body gave out. Fucking into him over and over again until Chilchuck was floating.
He had always known tallmen had more stamina than half-foots. It was one of the things he had been excited about when this started between them, curious just for how long his younger lover could keep him entertained. Soon he had found out ... and not looked back since.
"You like that?", Laios panted above him, curling in on himself to bury his face in Chilchuck's sweaty hair. "Like when I push you down and take you, yeah? Like when I hold you still and fuck you good?"
Chilchuck whined, straining to push his hips up and back with all the strength still left in his body. Damp fabric slipped from between his teeth as he babbled out his mindless answer.
"Fuck Laios, yes ... yes, make me beg ... beg for mercy ... and don't show me any..."
Above him Laios faltered, the steady snap of his hips slowing for just a few seconds. Then he picked up his pace with renewed vigour, making Chilchuck's eyes cross and his mind sputter out for whatever came next.
~
"So...", Laios hummed as they laid there after, Chilchuck sprawled out half on top of him where he had collapsed after getting wiped down. For some reason Laios sounded brazenly lucid while Chilchuck was close to nodding off.
"Make you beg for mercy and not show you any ... is that something you're interested in?"
Within seconds Chilchuck was wide awake again, breath catching in his throat and heart skipping a beat. Or five.
Because that stirred a memory. A hazy memory from when he had been near mindless with pleasure. A memory of him running his stupid mouth saying stupid things he really should not have said.
"Uhm", he mumbled intelligently as he tried to scrape his scrambled brain together enough to answer. "It was just ... that was ... just dirty talk. Don't worry about it."
Laios shifted underneath him, arms pulling tighter where they wrapped around Chilchuck's back.
"Are you sure? Because if it's something you want..."
"I said don't worry about it. Go to sleep, Laios." He forced out the words so fast his tongue was stumbling over itself. Before Laios could react any further Chilchuck wiggled out of his grasp to reach down for the blanket and pull it up around his shoulders. Turning onto his side he felt Laios slowly settle down to curl around his back, a careful arm coming to circle his waist and pull him closer.
Chilchuck's heart was still beating a nervous rhythm against his ribs by the time Laios' breaths had grown deep and even.
~
Morning came slow.
They had booked the room for their few days of rest between expeditions into the dungeon so sleeping in was a luxury Chilchuck allowed himself when he got the chance. By the time he groaned and stretched and blinked his eyes open sunlight was already streaming through the window and the sounds of a busy street were drifting up to them from outside. Taking a few deep breaths Chilchuck watched specks of dust dance in the sunbeams as he slowly found his way to wakefulness.
He had been apprehensive about taking a room at the local inn, way too aware of how rumours tended to spread. In the end Laios had worn him down with puppy eyes and surprisingly sound arguments. The time the two of them could spend together was limited. Too limited to waste sneaking around or travelling to meet up at remote locations. They had done that for months but by now Chilchuck, too, would much rather spend their time like they had last night.
Rumours had already started to spread, of course, most of them outrageous. For some reason though Chilchuck found himself not caring too much about those when he woke up this relaxed after a night well spent.
He stretched again with a yawn, feeling something in his back pop as his sore muscles protested.
"Ugh, I'll be feeling that for days", he grumbled, voice annoyed but body wholly satisfied as he turned around. Then blinked in confusion.
The other side of the bed was empty. Laios never woke up before him.
Sitting upright with a low noise - and oh, his backside had definitely not recovered yet, either - he found the tallman seated at the desk, scribbling something into his notebook. He looked up as he noticed Chilchuck moving, a smile replacing the focused frown on his face.
"Ah, good morning! Hope I didn't wake you up?"
"No, I ... what are you doing?", Chilchuck asked, rubbing the last remnants of sleep from his eyes. Even if Laios occasionally woke up before him, he usually stayed in bed to get in as much skin on skin contact as possible. Now though he only shrugged, as if it were the most normal thing for him to be doing paperwork instead of clinging to Chilchuck under the covers.
"Just writing up a shopping list for our meet-up later. Oh, I also brought you some breakfast from downstairs!" He pointed at a wooden bowl and a spoon resting on the bedside table next to Chilchuck. "Mala made porridge and I snagged some extra berries for you."
So he had. When Chilchuck, unsure what to reply, reached for the bowl, he found the porridge still hot and steaming. A handful of blueberries and raspberries as well as some sunflower seeds were scattered across the top. It smelled of cinnamon and vanilla and other spices. But Chilchuck was not quite ready to dig in.
"Alright, what is going on?"
The smile on Laios' face faltered, he looked down, then at the bowl in Chilchuck's hands.
"Maybe you should eat first, the food's getting cold..."
"Laios, you're freaking me out."
The words were terse but not very loud or sharp and still Laios flinched in his chair, shoulders pulling up as he kneaded his hands. After a moment of tense contemplation he decided to turn around to fully face Chilchuck.
A quick, shallow breath.
"I did something wrong, didn't I?", he asked, eyes still focused on the wooden bowl in Chilchuck's hands. "Last night. I upset you."
For a moment Chilchuck was dumbfounded by the question. Last night had been incredible, Laios had spoiled him thoroughly for hours on end. He could not imagine where the tallman had gotten the idea there had been anything wrong about that ... until his waking mind remembered.
From one moment to the next the scent of cinnamon and vanilla left Chilchuck gagging.
"I didn't mean to and I'm sorry! I just ... I wanted to make you happy. But I didn't. Can you ... please explain what went wrong? So I can do better?"
Oh no. This was spiralling out of control. Chilchuck was the one who had lost his grip on his urges and ran his mouth without thinking but somehow Laios ended up blaming himself for it? And he was being so good about it, too. Getting him breakfast and apologizing and wanting to understand ... Chilchuck had to put a stop to this immediately.
"Hold on, hold on, no!", he blurted out and finally golden eyes snapped up to met his own. Alert and confused. "You have nothing to apologize for, alright? Everything's fine."
Blond eyebrows knitted together as Laios' tilted his head to the side. He was still sitting on his chair like a scolded schoolboy and the sight made Chilchuck want to scream.
"But ... the thing I asked about ... you didn't like it."
"That had nothing to do with you, I promise. You have done nothing wrong, Laios."
Laios' shoulders, so tight before, slumped at those words, tension bleeding out of his body and leaving him looking defeated.
"Then I don't get what's happening ... I was so sure you liked that thing when you said it. You got so tight, Chil." There was something soft to Laios' voice, something dreamy and longing, before it tipped back into lost confusion. "And so I thought that must be something you like, something I can give you. But when I asked about it I was so sure you got upset..."
Rumbling a noise of frustration Chilchuck dragged a hand down his face. Why, just why, could he not have kept his mouth shut and his depraved ideas to himself? As much as he had hoped to just brush this off and pretend it never happened ... that was not an option if it left Laios blaming himself for something he had not done.
"No, you're right. You're absolutely right. I did like it, when I said it ... and later I did get ... upset." The word did not sit right in his mouth but he might as well admit it if Laios had already picked up on it. "But that had nothing to do with you. I'll explain, alright? Just..."
He sighed again, wishing for a stiff drink despite the early hour. This conversation would be so much easier with alcohol. As it were he opted for the next best option.
"Just ... let me eat first? Oh, and uh ... thank you. For breakfast..."
Laios gave a wide eyed nod, then continued to sit there and watch as Chilchuck reached for the spoon and began eating. The porridge was fine, even though Chilchuck felt like something was missing. Maybe he had spent too much time in the dungeon around Senshi's cooking.
By the time he had stuffed a few spoonfuls into his mouth the nausea had ebbed away and Laios was still watching him. Waiting patiently for Chilchuck to explain. He looked much less tense and more curious now, eager to understand. Chilchuck sighed and waved at the idiot to join him.
"Come here already, I know you want to."
Before he had even finished the sentence Laios was halfway across the room and soon joined him on the bed, scooting close. It took some shifting but they found a comfortable position, Laios leaning back against the headboard with Chilchuck tucked against his side so he could continue eating.
"I really thought you were angry with me", Laios breathed, burying his face in Chilchuck's hair and pulling him close.
"I'm not. I was..." Chilchuck took a deep breath, letting the bowl sink into his lap. That was the thing about Laios. He needed honesty. Usually it was not this challenging to give it to him. "I was embarrassed. That's why I didn't want to talk about it."
"Oh ... why?"
Chilchuck had known this question would be coming. He stuffed another spoonful of porridge into his mouth so he did not have to answer right away. Of course Laios would be confused about this. He was obviously not in the habit of feeling ashamed about the things he enjoyed.
All the more reason to explain this as plainly as possible, even though it might not be pleasant.
"All my life I have been ... ignored, talked down to, exploited and abused. I have fought long and hard to not have that happen to me again. So I think I'm allowed to feel a bit conflicted about ... asking you to do the same thing to me in bed. Especially since I didn't mean to and it just ... slipped out."
Laios said nothing for a long moment and Chilchuck was quick to stuff his face again, tips of his ears burning. He had finished his bowl and placed it on the bedside table by the time Laios answered.
"Of course you're allowed. It wouldn't be, though. The same, I mean."
Turning back around Chilchuck frowned at Laios and a large hand found his to gently pull him closer again. He did not return to Laios' side, though. Instead those hands guided him to straddle Laios' thighs so they could look at each other. The position was intimate in a way that would have made Chilchuck's skin crawl just a few months ago. But he understood Laios wanted to see him for this, even if his face was flushed too dark a shade and he would much rather hide it.
"You don't actually want me to abuse you and do things you don't like, right?" Large hands settled on his hips, warm and grounding, a comforting weight. His face was relaxed, eyes awake as they watched Chilchuck settle into his lap.
"Right. I mean ... wait a minute! I don't want you to do anything, alright? It was just a stupid thing I said and it doesn't matter. We can just keep on doing what we've been doing."
"Ah", Laios hummed and shifted underneath him, Chilchuck's bare legs rubbing against the rough fabric of his breeches. "But you got so tight Chil ... if there's anything making you that excited ... I'd love to give it to you."
Something flipped in Chilchuck's stomach. It was not a bad feeling.
"And there's nothing to be embarrassed about! We'd just ... play pretend, yes? Just like Falin and I did when we were kids ... I didn't actually want to shoot and kill her when we played guards and bandits."
"Laios, stop talking about your sister right now."
Before him Laios straightened just slightly, eyes widening as if snapping to attention. It was ... cute. In a way that made Chilchuck soften more than was probably wise right now.
"Yes, of course, sorry!", he stammered, then let out a quick breath before continuing. "What I mean is ... if there's something you want, this or ... or anything else, really, we can always just try. I like making you feel good, Chil ... and I'd love to make you feel good in all the ways you want."
Laios' voice dipped at the end, sweet devotion in his words and longing in his eyes. Though there was something else as well, something hot and wanting. Chilchuck swallowed. So much gentle honesty was almost contagious. He let the words sit for a moment, contemplating the pleasantly relaxed offer. If Laios was so nonchalant about all this, if he really wanted to give Chilchuck everything, even this ... then maybe at least contemplating it further would not hurt.
"I don't even know why I like the idea so much...", he admitted after a long stretch of silence, carefully wading into these unfamiliar waters with Laios' warm hands heavy on his hips. Laios shrugged.
"Does it matter?"
"I..." Chilchuck frowned. He had always assumed there must be a reason for those quiet, secret thoughts he only allowed himself to indulge in every so often. But with Laios so uninterested in any possible explanation for his fucked up fantasies...
"I only care that you like it, not why. And ... I would also care about what you'd want to happen. If we ever tried it?" It was a careful suggestion, leaving Chilchuck enough room to back out if he needed to. But it was also direct enough to immediately summon a number of interesting images that made heat flood back into Chilchuck's cheeks.
Laios tearing his clothes off and pushing him down, fingering him rough and quick before slapping his ass and sinking inside, too fast, too soon. Laios cooing about Chilchuck's cries and whimpers but ignoring them otherwise. Laios using his body without much regard for his enjoyment or even comfort, pushing and pulling him into all kinds of positions, fucking into him for hours, leaving him marked up and bruised...
Chilchuck swallowed again and shifted in Laios' lap. His cock was already stirring inside the smallclothes he wore during the night. Laios' eyes followed his movements, subtle as they were, watching the bob of his throat, the slow roll and shift of his hips.
"Do you want to tell me?" Barely more than a whisper, no more pressing than the previous question. "Tell me what you want me to do to you...?" Chilchuck felt the breath catch in his throat at the sensual tone. Anything, he almost said, everything. Thankfully he was not that far gone. But with Laios eyes and hands on him ... Chilchuck did want to answer.
His lips were sticking together as he parted them, absent-minded tongue flicking out to wet them.
"I want...", he began but soon did not know how to continue. It was not like he had one nice, coherent fantasy he could simply tell Laios about. Those ideas were scattered, needy things he only ever allowed himself to indulge in alone and never for long. "I..."
"Come on", Laios encouraged, sweet without pushing too much. "I want to give you everything you want ... you just have to tell me." He pulled Chilchuck closer, slanting their hips together until the press of his half hard cock became very much apparent.
Laios was not just entertaining Chilchuck. He truly liked where this was going.
Chilchuck let out a heated breath and tried again.
"Sometimes I ... I think about you overpowering me. Holding me down and making me take it." His face was flushed hot by the time he had gotten the words out but the look in Laios eyes was worth every thudding heartbeat. There was a glimmer to them, one they sometimes held when they had been going for a while. As if nothing else mattered to him but wringing as much pleasure as possible out of Chilchuck's body. Intense and sparking.
"You like when I do that? When I use my strength on you and you can just let go? Ah, you're so beautiful when you let go, Chil..."
"Yes. Yes, but ... this time ... I'm asking you to stop or ... or to slow down." Chilchuck's gaze drifted lower at that, away from Laios' intense eyes and down to his chest. He reached up to splay the fingers of one hand against a bare collarbone, feeling the rhythmic thumping of a curious heartbeat. "But you don't. You just tell me I'll have to bear it for you ... 'cause you're not finished..."
Chilchuck's hips twitched at his own words, at the image he painted for both own them. Laios encouraged the movement, helping his hips rock forward and down, guiding them with his hands and pushing his own upward into the friction between them. Chilchuck shuddered as he felt the heat of Laios' growing erection even through the fabric of breeches and smallclothes.
"Mh, you like that thought? Me using you until I'm satisfied? Even if you're begging me to stop?"
"Fuck, Laios", Chilchuck bit out, his cock giving a heavy throb in his smallclothes. He had not expected his lover to be this on board with his dark little fantasies. It left him hopelessly enamoured and helplessly aroused.
"Tell me more, Chil. Tell me about all the ways you want me to use you." The low rumble of his voice left the hairs along Chilchuck's neck prickling in the best way.
"I want you ... to use my mouth", he admitted after a short breath, still not able to look up again. "Want you to stuff it full ... and fuck it ... and barely let me breathe. No matter how much I squirm and whine..."
Laios reached up with one hand then, brushing curious fingertips against Chilchuck's lips who opened up willingly. Two fingers pushed into his mouth, salty sweet, pressing down against his tongue and sliding all the way to the back of Chilchuck's throat.
"Like this?", Laios asked as he pushed deeper, slowing down as Chilchuck gagged around the intrusion. But not stopping. Allowing him to get used to the pressure, to relax the back of his throat. "Hmm, yes. You love it when I force your throat open with my cock. Do you want to be all nice and spread out for me? With your head hanging off the edge of the bed so I can use your mouth?"
Chilchuck let out a heated whimper that was cut short when Laios pushed his fingers deeper, sliding them right down Chilchuck's throat. He gagged again, the sound of it wet and desperate.
"Do you want to get all light headed when I decide I need relief more than you need air?"
Chilchuck felt himself throb hard and heavy and he could swear he was already getting light headed even though it had barely been a few seconds. With how close they were pressed together Laios must have felt him twitch and he rolled his hips up into Chilchuck's again, pressing their hard lengths together.
The fingers remained where they were for a moment longer, almost long enough to make Chilchuck's heart flutter with an edge of panic, before he pulled them back out, slow and careful. Thick spit was clinging to them, drawing strands between the fingertips and Chilchuck's lips as he coughed, eyes watery and hands shaking.
"Fuck, Laios", he croaked and then watched, wide eyed and frozen, as Laios sucked the fingers between his own lips to gleefully clean Chilchuck's spit away. The sight made his stomach lurch and his cock twitch again. Laios only hummed, smacking his lips as he was finished.
"What else do you want, Chil?", he asked, as if any of this was normal. "Do you want to struggle? Try to escape and find out you can't?"
Their hips had taken up a steady rocking movement by now, grinding together in slow, even motions. For a moment Chilchuck was caught in the teasing grind and the image Laios' words painted for him. Imagined himself squirming and kicking, imagined Laios holding him down with ease. Then his eyes focused again, confused.
"Wait ... why are you so good at this? How do you know that?"
As if having been caught a cheeky smile snuck onto Laios' lips and the feverish heat dusted across his face and down his neck darkened.
"Ah ... well you're not the only one wondering what it would be like ... to be held down by someone ... something ... much larger and stronger than yourself..."
For a moment those words just hovered between them as Chilchuck blinked up at Laios. Then everything fell into place. Of course. He almost laughed, giddy relief flooding his body, replacing the cowering remains of doubt and shame. If there was anyone uniquely equipped to understand just what Chilchuck wanted out of this it had to be Laios. At the same time a shudder ran down his spine, his cock throbbing heavy where it rubbed up against Laios' through the fabric.
Reaching down with one hand he began unbuttoning Laios' breeches.
"Take them off right now."
But instead of following the demand the way Laios usually did when they fell into bed together, large hands came down to cover his own, stopping the motions.
"I ... I'd love to", Laios stammered, breathless and still deeply flushed when Chilchuck looked up at him in confusion. "But I ... also really want to talk about this. And I don't want you to say anything you'll regret, like last night. So maybe ... maybe we shouldn't..."
Chilchuck fell entirely still at those words, staring at Laios incredulously. For some reason his cock gave another heavy throb at being denied. He had never considered Laios being this hot when he was being responsible, of all things. Then he deflated with a huff that made Laios stammer again.
"I-I'm sorry! But I ... need you to tell me about this because you want to ... not because you can't think anymore."
Even though one part of Chilchuck still wanted to climb the man, now even more so than before, another, stronger part of him could admit that Laios was on to something. If they really wanted to try anything like this they needed to discuss it at least somewhat level-headed. As hard as pulling back now was.
But they were still pressed closely together and Chilchuck was happy to wrap his arms around Laios' neck and slip even closer. At least this had to still be allowed.
"You're right", he admitted as Laios arms found their way around him, one circling his waist, the other hand cupping his ass to tip him forward. "Gods, you are distracting sometimes..."
"Sorry", the word was warm against his lips and tasted of mint when they kissed, slow and deep and hot. The feverish heat crawling across Chilchuck's skin cooled down to a gentle simmer, the air between them still buzzing but with less urgency. After they parted from their indulgent kiss Chilchuck had made his peace with holding back. For now.
"Alright", he hummed, tilting back just enough so he could look at Laios. The slow, even grind of his hips did not stop. "What else do you want to know?"
"Anything you want to tell me. Like ... where would you want it to happen? Right here? On this bed?"
The images were immediate and vivid, Laios pushing his face down into these very sheets Chilchuck had fisted helplessly last night, pushing into him without care or mercy. But something about the fantasy was off.
"No...", he mumbled, still trying to find his reasoning. Then it occurred to him. "Too many people. I want to be loud. I want to scream..."
"Oh, yes..." The sigh was dreamy, Laios' gaze softening as he looked at Chilchuck, as if he were already imagining his helpless struggle. His shouts and screams and whimpers. "Somewhere secluded, then. Somewhere nobody can come and help you..."
The words, brimming with promises of danger and helpless struggle, sent another hot shudder down Chilchuck's spine.
"Yes", he breathed, mind flipping excitedly through ideas. "Want to be all alone with you, try to run and struggle and scream ... out in the woods, maybe. You could chase me a bit, hunt me down and then ravage me..."
Laios' eyes flashed at that, fingertips digging deeper into Chilchuck's skin, breath deepening.
"You want that?", he asked, voice low and deep as he shifted minutely. "Get away, maybe think you've made it just in time ... only for me to find you again and take what I want after all?"
"Mhh, you could even punish me ... for trying to get away from you...", Chilchuck added, coming up with all new ideas, now that they were spinning this tale together. Laios' eyes widened and he licked his lips.
"P-punish you how?"
Oh, so he liked that idea, judging by the breathless wonder in his voice. Chilchuck grinned, leaning in to ghost his lips against Laios' ear.
"Spank me, maybe. Or choke me. Or maybe ... maybe make me come."
"What?" The word was low and incredulous, Laios' cock twitching against his own as Chilchuck rolled his hips again.
"Ah, can't you imagine? I'm struggling and screaming so much, trying to get away from you ... so you hold me down and make me come just to prove how much a hypocrite I am, how badly I want it..."
"Gods, Chil..."
"Would leave me so sensitive as well, for anything else you want to do to me. I'd be a helpless, whimpering mess before you know it..."
A large hand came up to cup the back of Chilchuck's head, pulling him close as Laios shivered violently.
"Oh Chil, you want me to do that to you, yes?", he whispered, heated and needy, as his hips rolled up against Chilchuck's with more force. "Make you come so hard you're screaming and taunt you for it? Call you a greedy, little thing and tell you I'll give you what you need?"
Then there was a long, deep breath and a shuddering exhale as Laios stilled underneath him, then allowed Chilchuck more room to move again.
"Alright", he mumbled, "I think I can do that but, uhm ... I need to know some more things."
"Oh yeah?", Chilchuck asked, amused, as he leaned back to look at Laios. "Like what?"
"Like ... uhm, what's the story, I suppose? Am I myself? Do we know each other? What's ... going on?"
Chilchuck took a moment to ponder, playing with the different options until something felt right.
"You're definitely not yourself. You wouldn't do something like that to me, not even in a fantasy. And I ... don't think I want to know you. I think it'd be more intense if you were a stranger. But maybe ... you know me a little? Maybe you watched me? Waiting for your chance..."
Laios nodded quickly, breaths consciously slow and deep.
"Yes, that works ... I've been watching you ... and now I find you all alone in the woods ... or maybe I stalked you, followed you there..."
"Hmm, guess I'll never know", Chilchuck grinned, running the fingers of one hand through the buzzed, blond hair at the back of Laios' head. "Anything else you need to know?"
Another pause as Laios breathed slow and deep, eyes never leaving Chilchuck's.
"Yes", he finally said, somewhat more steady. "If we really want to do this ... and we don't have to but ... but I'd really like to ... uhm, I need to know how to keep you safe." He paused when Chilchuck just frowned up at him at that, then hurried to add: "I mean ... I don't want to accidentally do something you don't like so we need to talk about what you don't want to happen. And you need a way to stop me. A signal or something. If ... if it becomes too much."
Chilchuck hummed and nodded, leaning back a bit more, hands coming to rest on Laios' shoulders.
"Yes, you're right. I need some time to think about it, if that's alright? I mean there's some obvious stuff but ... I don't want to forget anything."
"Of course, yeah."
"And as for the signal ... well, I can't just tell you to stop, that's true..." Chilchuck was still thinking about a good kind of code when Laios piped up with an idea.
"Back when ... I played guards and bandits ... I would just call for a timeout when I needed a break?"
Chilchuck noticed the small hiccup to the words and quietly grinned to himself. Laios really was trying his best here.
"That should work. And if for some reason I can't talk ... I can give you a signal holding my hand up like this?", he suggested, holding up one hand with the thumb and pinky tucked into the palm so only the three fingers in the middle were still stretched out. I was a simple enough gesture he would be able to make even if his coordination was not the best anymore.
"You just need to make sure I can always either speak or use my arm. What do you think?"
Laios nodded, slow and thoughtful.
"Yes ... yes, I think that works for me."
"Anything else you want to know?"
Another pause, this time longer as Laios seemed to ponder their conversation.
"Right now ... just one more thing", he finally hummed, voice dipping lower as he took up the smooth roll of his hips again. "Do you still want me to take off my breeches?"
They ended up late to the meet-up with the others but Chilchuck did not mind. Not when he could still hear Laios' heated whisper:
"I will make you beg for mercy, Chil, and never show you any."