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Alastor felt an unpleasant chill when Charlie told him that her father was meeting with Vox . Sure, he might worry that the two of them were planning something together, worry that the influence he was so carefully weaving over Lucifer and his daughter wasn't as firm as he'd believed, but none of that was the reason for his dismay. .
Several months ago, when Alastor, to his utter annoyance, received advances from Vox (Again!) he had accidentally hinted that he was dating Lucifer. It wasn't his intention, but upon realizing it he decided that the plan was brilliant. Without a doubt, Vox would begin to stay within the acceptable limits of their rivalry now that he thought that Alastor was “taken” by the king of hell. Who would dare to challenge that white lie?
A few weeks later, when Lucifer seemed to be about to make a confession to him he had panicked until his brain lit up with the bright idea of recycling his plan and he told Lucifer that he had to leave for a date with Vox. Lucifer had been remarkably faithful to his ex-wife for literal thousands of years and only very recently had he taken off his ring and started dropping hints that he was ready to get back into the swing of things. Alastor did not understand why he had apparently wanted to try it with him, but he saw it as unlikely that he would continue after this refusal. They could both pretend it hadn't even happened.
So far it had been the perfect plan. What were the chances of them meeting and discovering his little lie? Null, zero, impossible. Except it seemed like he was completely wrong.
"How long have they been there?" Alastor asked, looking at his shadow to spy on them.
"They went up shortly before you arrived," replied Husk, the only one left present. He was also looking in the direction of the stairs with something that almost seemed like concern.
Alastor wondered why before concluding that it was possible that Husk was looking for a way to release Angel from his contract. Annoying, dangerous, and potentially useful if there was actually a way to do it and Lucifer wasn't simply looking for a way to get Vox to negotiate with Valentino on his behalf. Alastor deeply regretted not being present for that meeting.
He really didn't like being left in the dark.
His shadow returned looking frantic. When he joined Alastor he could see a distorted version of Lucifer's office, both men glaring at each other. Vox looked barely civil and Lucifer leaned on his desk with a fierce glare.
" I certainly can't understand what he sees in you ," Lucifer told him with a scornful look.
Alastor walked to the bar and gestured to Husk who looked at him surprised. Alastor was going to need at least two drinks to deal with this because from what his shadow observed, they had both somehow concluded that Alastor was dating both of them .
Vox? he could deal with a scorned Vox, although it would be annoying. Lucifer? Alastor really didn't want to know what his reaction would be to finding out that he had been figuratively cuckolded. How could they both be such idiots? Should Alastor confess to his ruse?
He downed the first two drinks and sat down with the third to wait. He would see what happened when they came down. Until then it was better not to rush, that's what got him into this mess. He should have broken Vox's screen again and trampled on Lucifer's tender heart.
What was done was done.
Almost half an hour later both men came down. Happy. Whispering. Next to each other. Alastor swallowed when they saw him, he felt a weight in his stomach and wondered if it was too late to run away.
"Alastor, there you are!" Vox shouted happily.
Alastor took a long drink, hoping the burning sensation would help him calm down.
"You really have to improve your communication, Alastor," Lucifer admonished him. Alastor didn't dare to answer. Did they think it was all a misunderstanding? Certainly Alastor had relied on making them believe assumptions, that would be a good alibi: Alastor did nothing, they misunderstood him. "That's not how polyamorous relationships work, they're a little more difficult. But I know that between the three of us we will figure it out."
Alastor couldn't understand what they were talking about, he looked to Husk for guidance, but the cat seemed just as confused. Luckily, before his gaze, Husk decided to take a step forward (or maybe it was just the curiosity of a cat)
"What are you talking about?"
The two men looked at each other and laughed, gesturing to each other until Lucifer agreed to be the one to explain.
“You see, someone ” he gave Alator a dirty look, but it was too full of good humor to actually look angry“informed us that he was happy to be in a relationship with both of us.” When did Alastor do that?! "but he did it so badly that we didn't realize until we talked about it" Lucifer threw a delighted smile at Alastor and Vox, Alastor for his part could only look horrified at the nonsense that came out of Lucifer's mouth "but everything It's fixed."
"Completely" Vox winked at Alastor.
—And who knows—Lucifer's cheeks blushed—perhaps completing the triangle will be more convenient for everyone—He looked askance at Vox and then at Alastor—Only if you agree, Al!
Alastor took a deep breath and leaned back from the bar, whispering into Husk's fine ears without moving his lips.
"What the hell are they talking about?"
Husk leaned over the bar, at a level that Alastor's ears would easily pick up even though he covered his mouth to pretend to hide a smile.
"They think you're dating both of them and they want to date each other... Boss, how...?"
"Later," Alastor silenced Husk's curiosity. He was going to indulge this quirk of his, after all Alastor valued what Husk had to say even when he didn't like listening to it and it was likely that he was going to need some help.
"It looks like we'll have to talk about a lot of things in the future!" Alastor said happily, getting up, "but tonight I'm tired."
Alastor dissolved into the shadows. He needed time and space to think. Maybe it was all a ruse? and if it wasn't... Alastor didn't particularly want to fake a relationship or give Vox power over Lucifer but... Could he match them up? Maybe then they would finally leave Alastor alone…