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Originally, when Seungho had brought up the topic of running away to elope, he thought that Nakyum would reject him outright. Nakyum was always the one who remembered his duties, what society desired from both of them, always aware of their stations in life. So, when Nakyum suddenly grabbed him by the waist and agreed to leave, Seungho was more than a little shocked. His words warmed Seungho’s chest, clenching his heart further into Nakyum’s grip, and he couldn’t stop himself from agreeing.
They spent the rest of the night planning, Seungho laying out a map of Korea, choosing a small town across the country, a 2-day trip from them. Nerves kept the couple awake as they packed essentials, easy chatter between the two of them flowing into Seungho’s chambers.
While he kept his voice calm, he panicked in his mind. How would they sneak away without notice? Should he tell servant Kim? Will Nakyum regret this decision? Will they be caught and punished? He could hardly keep his hands from shaking as he stuffs his least ostentatious clothes into a pack.
“Do you think we should leave a note?” Nakyum asks gently into the night air, wrapping the yellow scarf Seungho gifted him around his neck. “At least for your brother?”
Seungho hummed in thought, taking the idea in. It might be a good idea to keep a search team away. His brother had been as supportive of Seungho and Nakyum’s whims so far as he could be, urging Seungho gently into acting in ways that would help both of them. He was endlessly good at controlling their father, something that had always evaded Seungho.
“I suppose,” Seungho says, setting his filled pack down and sitting. “Could you bring me my brush and some parchment?”
Nakyum nods, a small smile on his face. Seungho knows he’s just as nervous as Seungho is, and he wishes he could ease the boy’s anxiety more. When Nakyum brings the materials to him, Seungho gently cups the boy’s cheek in his hand, exhaling when Nakyum leans into his palm. There was a time when Nakyum flinched away from his touch because of Seungho’s behavior, and now the boy gently leaned into him, smiling and flushed. Seungho doesn’t know when the change happened, doesn’t know how he became lucky enough that Nakyum didn’t continue to reject him, but he’s forever grateful for it.
Seungho begins writing the letter, careful with his words. He tries to convey to his brother the importance of keeping silent about where they are, and how he will find some way to repay him for keeping control of his father. One day, they will meet again, and Seungho will repay him for the support he feels he has done nothing to deserve.
Once he finishes his letter to Seungwon, he writes another for servant Kim, instructing him on what to do once they are gone. He knows that he had previously doubted servant Kim, but after hearing Kim tell him that he would choose Nakyum over Lord Yoon, his distrust faded. He felt much in the same way as the servant. If anyone tried to make him choose between anyone and Nakyum, he would choose Nakyum in a heartbeat.
Nakyum leans gently on his side, eyes shut but not asleep. Seungho feels his restlessness in the way he fidgets his fingers, the way he breathes, the edge to his sighs. Seungho folds the notes and puts them together, the one for Kim on top, before kissing Nakyum’s head gently.
“You’re sure that you are okay with leaving, Nakyum?” Seungho asks, nosing at Nakyum’s hair and breathing in his scent. “I don’t want you to feel any regrets about this decision.”
Nakyum hums, eyes fluttering open, and leans back.
“I was worried, at first, when you asked me,” Nakyum admits, twirling his fingers together nervously. Seungho nods, knowing this. “I wish that there was another way that we could be together without one of us suffering, but I continue to find that life cares not for the wishes of man. While I wish there was another way for us, I do not regret choosing you, my Lord.”
Nakyum shifts, bringing his hands up to cup Seungho’s face, squishing his cheeks lightly with the pressure.
“If I were made to choose between anyone else and you, my Lord, I would choose you,” Nakyum says, smile wide and blush bright, eyes crinkling with joy. “While I may miss this comfortable bed and warm lodging, I cannot regret being with you, forever.”
Seungho can’t help but kiss him in response, overwhelming heat flooding his body in response to his small speech. While they will face hardships in the journey ahead, they will have each other.
__
Seungho and Nakyum take one horse, their packs of clothes and necessities hanging off the sides of their saddle and dressed in their darkest and most modest clothing. Nakyum gripped Seungho’s waist, hands trembling. Seungho touched his hands with his non-dominant hand, gently trying to calm him.
“Do not worry yourself, Nakyum,” he says, looking up into the night sky before spurring on the horse. “I will not allow harm to come your way.”
Seungho knows, deep down in his heart, that he cannot truly promise that, but he still says it. He will do whatever he needs to do to avoid harm coming to Nakyum.
The journey is slow, especially with paranoia nicking at their heels. Every dark shadow in the forest sends shivers down their spines, and every stop they made was filled with worry that guards or assassins had followed them. Seungho could feel Nakyum’s fear and tried to calm it when he could.
By nightfall the next day, they are both too exhausted to carry on, and Seungho estimates that they are close to halfway to their destination. They tie their horse to a tree and slowly set a place for them to sleep, covered by the forest, sheltered by the night sky.
“My lord?” Nakyum says, laying their sleeping mats flat.
“Yes?”
“While we were traveling, I had a thought come, but I am not sure if you will agree,” Nakyum plays with his fingers slightly, clearly nervous.
“Come here,” Seungho beckons, lifting Nakyum into his lap and gently petting his head. “Please tell me your thoughts. I will not be upset with you.”
Nakyum nods. “I was thinking about your hair, my Lord,” Nakyum says, running his fingers through a stray piece that fell from his topknot.
“My hair?”
“You see, having your hair in the sangtu style, especially with your manggeon, will out you as more than a mere commoner among the people in our new home,” Nakyum begins, voice gentle, as if fearing Seungho’s wrath. Seungho hopes for a day where Nakyum does not fear his wrath over simple requests. “Furthermore, I fear that, keeping your appearance as it is will cause those who may have seen you in the past to recognize your identity. I do not want you to be outed as Lord Yoon Seungho as soon as we step foot in the place we wish to make our home.”
Seungho hums, thinking on it, understanding the request. He’s kept his hair long for his entire life, as long as he can remember it has been past his shoulders. Those who know him know him by his appearance, and he understands Nakyum’s fears.
“I see your point,” Seungho says, making his decision. He reaches behind him to pull out the knife he brought with him for safety. He has his sword as well, but this knife will frighten Nakyum less. “Use this.”
He places the knife in Nakyum’s hands, watching the boy’s eyes go wide.
“What are you saying?” Nakyum exclaims, brows knotted together and flush rising to his cheeks again.
“Cut my topknot for me. Please take care to not cut me in the process,” Seungho says, guiding Nakyum to grip the knife and bringing his hands up to his head. “It’s better you than I.”
“Are you positive, my Lord?” Nakyum’s hands shake slightly, eyes wide in fear. “I don’t want to harm you.”
“You will not harm me,” Seungho says, trying to calm the boy with his smile.
Nakyum stands behind Seungho, touching the top of Seungho’s head gently, wrapping his hand around the topknot. Seungho feels the blade of the knife resting on its side against his scalp. He feels as Nakyum gently works the blade across the strands, love in every move he makes. Once he makes his way across Seungho’s scalp, the man feels his hair fall down, dusting his ears, tickling his chin.
He reaches up to feel the new style, feeling that it is not fully short like Nakyum’s, but down to only his chin. Nakyum gazes at him as well, eyes boring into Seungho’s head, and the man smiles up at him.
“How does it look?” Seungho asks, reaching to take the blade and the piece of hair from Nakyum’s grasp. “Are my handsome features ruined?”
Seungho sets the knife and hair down onto the sack before turning back, where Nakyum grasps his cheeks and kisses him hard, taking Seungho off-guard. Nakyum rarely is the one to initiate like this, much less with so much eagerness. He lets himself be swept up in the kiss, gripping Nakyum tightly and flipping him over.
“You look incredibly handsome, Lord Seungho,” Nakyum gasps when they part, eyes glittering.
“You know, Kyum-ah,” Seungho says, kissing Nakyum’s neck gently. “If you really want to play the part, you can’t call me ‘Lord’ any longer.”
“I--!” He’s cut off from a rebuttal by Seungho kissing him again, smile gently gracing his face. “I suppose you have a point, my Lord.”
“You said it again,” Seungho kisses him again, causing Nakyum to giggle. “You must practice so that you don’t slip up and expose us both.”
They kiss and roll around for a few more moments before Seungho makes Nakyum practice.
“S-Seungho,” Nakyum stutters, blushing deeply.
“Good. Once more,” Seungho says, grabbing Nakyum’s hands gently, rubbing his thumbs over Nakyum’s knuckles.
“Seungho,” he says, voice more stable and more confident. “Yoon Seungho.”
Seungho hums again, nodding. “You know, the Lord Yoon’s name is quite known in this country. I suppose that this new identity might necessitate a new surname to avoid suspicion.”
Nakyum nods, taking this information in. “That makes sense, Seungho.”
Seungho ruffles the boy’s hair, proud. “You managed to use it in a sentence. Good work.”
Nakyum smiles brightly, eyes growing tired. They should rest soon.
“I will think on it,” Seungho says, cupping Nakyum’s cheek. “Let us rest now. We have another long day of our journey in the morning.”
Settling together in their sleeping mats, trying to find comfort in the cold, hard ground, Seungho already has an idea of what he wants to change his name to.
__
They make good time in their next day of traveling, taking less stops and eating on horseback to avoid lengthening the trip any longer. They arrive in the small town near dusk, greeted by men at the edge of the town. It takes a small amount of work and bribery to allow them to go in the town, and the guards find a small home that the pair can live in. It is much more basic and threadbare than Seungho has ever lived in, with small repairs needed.
He thinks it is a perfect area for them to live in.
“You both, what are your names?” The seller of the house asks.
“This is Baek Nakyum,” Seungho says, hand gesturing at the smaller boy. “He is my partner.”
The word is more vague than Seungho would like, but he can only ask for so much.
“And you are?” The seller asks again, voice laced with irritation.
“I am Baek Seungho.”
“Welcome to the village,” the man says, departing the front yard.
Seungho turns to Nakyum, who had been silent during the interaction. He is surprised when he sees tears running down Nakyum’s cheeks.
“Kyum-ah? Are you hurt?” Seungho cups his cheeks, wiping his tears away.
“I’m perfect, Seungho,” Nakyum smiles brightly. “You just make me incredibly happy.”
Seungho smiles back, leaning down to kiss the boy.
__
It was more simple to engrain themselves in the local environment than Seungho thought it would be. Most people in the town didn’t care that there was a new addition, but a few people came around and brought them gifts to start their home.
“My Bonhwa told me that you two arrived with naught but your clothes on your backs. Take these, you will need them!” A small woman with greying hair gives them satchels of seeds to grow food.
“It will take time to settle here,” an older man tells them as he brings over a basket of different foods. “Here is something to start you both out.”
“Minjee said that you one of you paints! She wanted me to bring you these supplies to help you make something for her to sell.” A young male child says, giving Nakyum some ink and paper. “She said to make yourself known in the market so that she can get you both started.”
Seungho had trouble, sometimes, reigning in his temper and paranoia, especially when he felt that people around them were being too kind. Nakyum always knew when to interrupt, when to put himself between Seungho and the other person, when to glare and when to give a calming smile to Seungho to keep him in control. He’s endlessly grateful that Nakyum has so much control over his heart.
Nakyum is also endlessly charming to the people around him, which helps them keep suspicion away. Sometimes it gets under Seungho’s skin, especially when he sees Nakyum smile brightly at another young man, inky dark jealousy running through his veins. However, Nakyum is always quick to remind him who he comes home to, and who he sleeps with every night.
Seungho tries to hide his panic when a local salesman talks to him about how he heard a nobleman suddenly disappeared from his home. The man did not know the nobleman’s name, just working off a rumor he had heard from the grapevine, passing it along to Seungho.
That night, Nakyum runs his fingers through Seungho’s hair, gently massaging his scalp. It had been months since they had left, and they were still safe. He knows that it is his paranoia taking over, and lets Nakyum soothe him to sleep.
___
The first time Nakyum falls ill, Seungho feels slightly helpless. The town doctor helps, but he is an old, fading man, who can barely keep going to homes to care for the members of the town. It is up to Seungho to take care of Nakyum properly.
He gently wipes Nakyum’s brow, cleaning the sweat he has from his fever.
“I’m sorry, Seungho,” Nakyum says, eyes glittering and face flushed. “I should have listened to you.”
Seungho feels the vicious retort in his throat that yes, Nakyum should have listened to him that day. Seungho could see the rain coming and warned Nakyum that he should stay inside and paint instead of till their small backyard to work their garden. Nakyum instead stayed outside and tried to continue to work on the garden while it rained until Seungho carried him inside. So, yes, Nakyum should have listened to him when he said that Nakyum would fall ill from this.
But he knows that retort will do nothing but cause Nakyum more guilt. He knows that retort is a side-effect of living the life he has, living as if no other mattered as much as he did. He knows that they are past that behavior in their relationship, so he bites back the retort, knowing that it is not helpful.
“You’ll be okay, Kyum-ah,” Seungho says, cleaning the boy gently. “I am not upset with you. I just hope this fever breaks soon.”
Nakyum nods, and Seungho continues to treat him.
After two long days of care, Nakyum is back to his usual self, and Seungho feels like he can breathe properly again.
___
Time passes, and the longer the pair live in this new town and adapt themselves to life there, the more the couple relax. One day, word reaches the town that Lord Yoon has passed, and it sends a shiver through Seungho.
This was the day he dreamed of for years as a child and even when he had reached adulthood. Now, though, the fact that his father, the tyrant who caused him so much pain, was dead did not affect him as much as he thought it would.
He goes home to see Nakyum cooking their dinner, the boy smiling at Seungho gently.
“Welcome home, Seungho,” he greets, walking over to kiss him gently as he does every day.
“I’m home,” Seungho says, leaning over and kissing him back. “I heard something interesting from Junghee today.”
“Oh, the salesman?” Nakyum says, turning back to his work on the stove. “What did he say?”
Seungho steps behind Nakyum, burying his nose in the boy’s hair, taking in his scent again. “My father is dead.”
Nakyum turns, eyes wide and face pale. “Lord Yoon? He passed?”
“The very same,” Seungho says, reaching for Nakyum’s hand.
“That means—” Nakyum starts, before Seungho kisses him gently.
“We’re free, Kyum-ah,” Seungho says, a smile working its way onto his face. “I love you.”
“I love you too, Seungho,” Nakyum says, leaning against him gently. “Do you want to return home?”
“Haven’t you realized, Nakyum?” Seungho asks, and Nakyum shakes his head. “My home is with you, not a building or a town. Where you are is where I am meant to be.”
Nakyum kisses him hard, eyes glittering with tears.
As they eat dinner together, Nakyum gently goes back to the subject.
“Now that Lord Yoon is—” Nakyum begins, hesitating at the words.
“Dead.” Seungho finishes for him.
“Yes. Now that we know that, do you think it would be safe to send your brother a letter?” Nakyum looks nervous, biting his lip. The boy has gotten better with his worry during their time here, rarely getting worried of Seungho’s wrath now that he hasn’t faced it in over a year. Still, he still worries over Seungho, not fearing his anger, but wishing that he did not have to face hard emotions.
“I suppose it would be, as long as I write in a way I know only he can read,” Seungho says, thinking of his brother. “I did tell him that I would allow him to visit once he believes that the time is safe.”
Nakyum’s worry fades, a small smile adorning his face.
“Would you like to write your sisters, and I can ask him to give them your letter?” Seungho asks, petting Nakyum.
“I would love that, Seungho,” Nakyum smiles wide, brightening the room around them.
__
Two months after Seungho sends that letter, he hears a knock on their door. It’s a rare day that both he and Nakyum are home during the entire day, with Seungho cleaning and taking care of the inside of their home and its repairs while Nakyum works on their garden, finally blooming. He sets down his tools, wiping his hands on the cloth beneath him before standing to answer the door. They weren’t expecting anyone, so a nervous thread tightens in his chest, but he breathes through it.
He opens the door to find his brother standing in front of it, with Heena behind him.
“It is good to see you, brother,” Seungwon says, smiling. “May we come in?”
Seungho lets the pair in, sitting them down at their small dining table and letting them know he was going to grab Nakyum. He steps through their back door, watching his beloved work for a second. The boy has a straw hat protecting his face and hair, and his basket is full of vegetables and fruit.
Nakyum notices Seungho there and smiles up at him.
“You should come inside, Kyum-ah,” Seungho says, reaching out a hand to help the boy up. “We have visitors.”
“Visitors?” Nakyum asks, eyes wide with surprise and face flushed after working in the heat.
“Come in and see,” Seungho guides him, holding his hand gently.
Nakyum walks in and gasps when he sees Heena, running to meet her in a tight hug, both crying gently into each other’s shoulders. Seungho smiles down at his brother, who meets his smile.
“I apologize for how long it has been since we’ve seen each other,” Seungwon says, relaxing on the floor of their home. “I wanted to wait and make sure that everything had settled enough that a visit like this would not raise suspicion.”
“No apologies are needed, brother,” Seungho says, standing to make tea for everyone. “I thank you for keeping our whereabouts safe close to your chest and looking out for us.”
“Yes, thank you,” Nakyum says, finally broken free from the embrace of his sister, who has moved back to the table. Their eyes still glitter with tears, but they are smiling. “I never thought we could have a safe, gently life like this.”
“It is odd to see you both like this,” Seungwon says with a gentle laugh, taking the tea Seungho handed him in both hands. “I’ve never seen my brother by the oven without it being some cruel prank.”
“Life here has taught me respect for making food on your own,” Seungho says, causing everyone at the table to laugh.
Conversation flows gently between the four of them, catching them up on their lives. Seungwon comments on how casually Nakyum addresses Seungho now, which causes the boy to blush and hide his face. Heena gently teases Seungho on how he must dress himself now, to which Seungho smugly replies that he receives help from Nakyum in dressing. They share laughter, tears, and food through the day, and Seungho has never felt this happy around his brother since he was a child.
They invite the pair to sleep at their home that night, which they agree to. Everyone piles into the one bedroom of the home, not far from each other physically, and Seungho thinks to himself that he is glad that he can have peaceful nights now.
Seungwon and Heena leave in the morning, with Nakyum and Seungho waving them off.
Seungho and Nakyum have a busy day ahead of catching up with the tasks that were forgotten the day before, but they gently hold each other’s hand as they watch their families leave.
“Seungho?”
“Yes, Kyum-ah?”
“Thank you for bringing me here. I love you.”
Seungho smiles and kisses the top of Nakyum’s head.
“I love you, too, Nakyum,” he says, voice more gentle than he thinks he has been for years. “Thank you for saving me.”