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Self-Direction

Summary:

Someone has to get the Plaga out of Leon.

Notes:

Getting into RE (or at least 4 and Village) and yaaaay I understand why the internet wants to do abhorrent things to Leon. He is, in fact, babygirl.

In watching the comparisons between RE4 and the remake I was bummed that we didn't get to see Leon get lasered, but then again his reaction in the original didn't have enough screaming anyway

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She came to with a raggedy cough. The mere act of it nearly knocked her back out again. Having the air knocked out of her was probably a good thing- any and all of it would have immediately been devoted to screaming in pain, screaming at whatever had attacked her, or both.

Ashley couldn’t think of any other way to describe it than something being slammed into her ribs. Other bodily sensations came back slowly, poking out from under the blanket of pain. Plasticky material sticking to her sweat-soaked back. Stale air. The smallest crack of her eyelids let in a flood of harsh light that left streaks even when she closed them again. What few words she could string together coherently were expletives. Whether or not they managed to leave her mouth was a worry that took far too much energy right now.

With a bit of force, her bare arms peeled away from the armrests and settled into the familiarity of her lap. As her vision started to clear, Ashley turned them over to get a good look. Nothing appeared broken. Her wrists were sore, something told her that they were going to bruise, but they still bent without much issue. Hopefully the same could be said for her legs. Placing her hands against the armrests, she managed to wiggle forward until her legs could swing over the side. One foot bumped into something immediately. Something that didn’t feel quite right. It took a few more little wiggles until she could stick her head out far enough to see.

Leon was passed out on the floor right at her side.

In her still-rattled thoughts, Ashley could only stare at him in silence, wondering why he was there and what he was doing. Had he dropped something? Was he combing through every nook and cranny for supplies again? Why-

Right. The plaga. That’s what they’d been doing, trying to find a way to get the disgusting little parasites out of them.

Ashley felt along her ribs, her chest, her sides. Nothing felt unusual. Was that good? The bone-deep sense of exhaustion was gone, and so were the rotted veins…it felt better, that was for sure. They’d done it? They had actually found the cure?

Any possible elation fizzled out. She peered over the side of the chair again. Leon hadn’t so much as twitched. He’d spent all his energy to help her, and now he had none left to help himself

For a moment, the thought crossed her mind that he was already dead. One leg moved to toe at his body. No reaction, but he rolled over slightly, offering Ashley a view of his chest as it minutely shifted up and down. Not dead. But looking very, very close to it.

A shot of adrenaline suddenly made her body much more willing to move. The harsh lights became nothing more than a background footnote. Ashley scrambled out of the chair, pushing through the wobbly knees that reluctantly held her weight for the first time in a while. This wasn’t about her anymore, it couldn’t be. She couldn’t afford to sit and waste time.

Her head snapped back and forth, looking for anything that could be of use. Ashley tore through the nearby cabinets, but found little more than medical supplies and machinery beyond her understanding. The doors clattered as she slammed them shut. One drawer was stuffed full of papers. Nothing useful to help carry Leon, but she found herself pausing for a moment. She pushed several official-looking documents away. Underneath it, there was a rumpled sheet of something, folded into quarters. Ashley pulled it out and unfolded it to get a better look. A map? It was pretty rough-looking, but it still had enough definition in its simplistic scribbles to suggest part of the building’s structure. A bright red arrow snaked through it. That had to be an escape route. Rough or not, she- they, needed whatever help they could to make it out of here safely.

A map. That was good, but it wouldn’t be as much use when it came to the weight she had to carry. No options presented itself. No straps, no stirrups, nothing to lighten the load.

…Fine. If there was nothing to help, Ashley would just have to lift him herself.

She wouldn’t pretend that this was easy. Thankfully, being alone meant there was nobody to judge her for the litany of hissed curses as she wrestled with roughly 200 pounds of dead weight. He didn’t even twitch as her hand slipped and jammed into his side. The adrenaline had to be doing the hard work. Even if it was difficult, she was still, somehow, making progress, eventually shoving her guard’s limp body into the operating chair with a few choice shoulder shoves.

This wasn’t weird anymore. Goddamn, what a bizarre couple of days this had been. Leon had to be the only thing holding her sanity intact. What would her father think? Would he be proud of her holding her own, or horrified to see her hardened by the experience? Of course, she was nowhere near Leon’s level of experience, but she struggled to acknowledge that the ‘her’ of right now was the same ‘her’ who used to worry about such small, insignificant things only a short while ago. There were moments where she wondered if she’d gone completely crazy. That this had all been some insane fantasy her brain had cooked up. Not Leon, though. She had never doubted that Leon was real.

All she could think of were the tiny things. A reluctant smile twitching at the corners of his lips. How he’d spread his arms to catch her, so cautious that even the abrupt drop and stop hadn’t left his fingers biting into her shoulders. Snickering together in the shooting gallery, sneaking in a little bit of dumb fun between the rest of the horrors. The warm timbre of his voice as he encouraged her to keep going. No matter how many times she’d been terrified or doubtful, he’d reassured her. It must have grated on his nerves, having to constantly assuage her worries, but he’d never let it slip out through his tone.

She’d trusted him with everything. Now she had to return the favor. Ashley just hoped that she’d come through when he needed her most.

The console’s setup was, mercifully, simple. She hadn’t been able to catch much of it while half-conscious and screaming. It looked like there weren’t too many options. Ashley wished she could have thanked Luis for his easy organization. Regrets could come later, once they were safe.

With a mere few keystrokes, she had found a screen that showed a scan of Leon’s chest cavity. Something wriggling and way too big- Jesus christ, that had been inside her, how could that fit inside a person- sat wrapped around his right lung, tail slithering around the nearby organs. She could barely bring herself to look at it, only doing so to make sure the scanner was doing its job. Leon had done plenty of horrifying, disgusting things for her sake. This was only fair.

The machine spent several moments more to focus in on the wriggling parasite. A new menu popped up over the scan.

[Purge?]

[Yes] No

Ashley hesitated, a finger hovering over the button that would, theoretically, save his life. But what if it didn’t? What if this was the wrong option? What if the machine ran out of juice partway through? What if she exhausted all its power, and now there was nothing left for him? Even with the solution practically handed to her, she couldn’t commit. They’d come so far. What if Ashley ruined it all at the last second, and he died, or worse, and it was all her fault? Trusting Leon was easy. Could she trust herself to not screw this up?

The screen’s sickly green glow illuminated her hand. Tinted black veins had already receded away and left her flesh pink and healthy, as though nothing had ever happened. When she turned to Leon, Ashley could barely see his normal skin tone amid the web of blackened patterns that pumped poison into every inch of his body.

She turned back to the computer. Asked herself the same question once more. The answer came quickly.

Of course she did. What was the alternative?

Restraints popped out of the chair’s armrests. A thought crossed her mind that they weren’t much use in Leon’s current state, and she despised that she found it funny. Maybe that could be pinned on nerves. A trio of strange contraptions unfolded over the seat, their sharp ends scraping the air like a looming scorpion’s claws. She looked back at the screen to be sure everything was still working. Crosshairs converged over the alien silhouette.

Ashley bit her lip. “...Here goes nothing.”

She winced almost immediately. Even if he was unconscious, something about the procedure was still enough to get a reaction out of Leon. The moment the lasers hummed to life, he screamed. Every loose muscle clenched tight, making his back arch like a bow and his arms struggle in the confined of the metal shackles. They’d served a purpose after all, it seemed. The thought didn’t bring her any joy.

She hoped it was just an initial moment of shock. No such luck. His shrieks jumped in pitch and intensity. There was no ruggedness or cool indifference toward it. No energy left to put up a front. Just screaming, just the ragged, primal wails of a man in agony. The noise hurt to listen to, and it hurt even more knowing that it came from him. From Leon, the man who had looked death in the face several times over and brushed it off with an offbeat quip.

Sparing only a second to check the screen and make sure everything was progressing, Ashley practically threw herself at his side. Though his hands were pinned, she could still hold them in hers. Leon’s fingers clung on, but she couldn’t say for sure if it was an intentional act, or the pain making everything contract. It didn’t matter. She didn’t care. Anything that made the tormented screaming more bearable. It was a noise she knew would be appearing in her bad dreams years from now.

“Breathe. You’ve got this. C-c’mon, Leon, we’ve been through worse, right?”

He didn’t respond. He only screamed.

“Breathe. Breathe. Breathe, Leon.” A thumb brushed the back of his hand in a vain attempt at reassurance. “You’re gonna be okay, I’ve got you. Just hold on…”

Something on the console chirped. When she turned to look, she caught sight of the dismantled chunks of parasite being sterilized from his body.

“Oh, thank- “ Ashley’s eyes shot open in panic.

Leon immediately went slack in her grip.

“Leon? Leon??” No reaction. She shook him. “Leon?!”

The restraints popped open, and still, nothing. She grabbed one of his arms and twisted. Two fingers from one hand pressed into the dip below his palm. It took three tries before she caught anything. But it was there. God, there was something. A dull, steady heartbeat pulsing under his skin.

“Damn it…” Ashley was thankful that he couldn’t hear the wet warbling in her voice. “Don’t you dare do that to me, don’t you dare scare me like that, you big idiot...”

He looked…okay. The tainted veins were already withdrawing. Nothing on the console screen suggested anything had gone wrong. It was gone. The filthy bugs were gone.

This whole thing had put her on edge. The sound of something creaking in Leon’s spot was enough to make her jump away. In her uneasy state of mind, a thought of the plaga somehow digging itself out of his skin flashed by with far too much detail for her liking. But there was no plaga to be found. Just Leon, blinking blearily in the light.

“Ashley?” He croaked out. “Ashley…?”

She cautiously moved into his field of view, uncertain of what she was seeing, uncertain if it was real. “I’m right here.” Though she tried to remain calm, emotions overtook her, and she wrapped herself around his waist, only thinking to restrain herself at the last second out of fear of hurting him more. “I thought you were gonna die.”

“Okay…” He awkwardly patted her on the back. Like she was the one who needed comforting, like he hadn’t just nearly died- oh god, they both had-

Leon was looking at himself, analyzing every bit of skin visible. He looked just as confused as she had. “You did this?”

Ashley was in even more disbelief, but “yeah.” She nodded, gesturing vaguely to the room around them. “Yeah, I did this!…Can you stand?”

He moved to the seat’s edge and let his feet brush the floor. Leon put up a good display of balance for a few moments, until his knees buckled and a hiss escaped from clenched teeth. Ashley ducked forward to grab him again. He regained his balance as quickly as he’d lost it, and while she wasn’t quite confident with his wonky posture yet, she let it be. It was okay if he didn’t need her right this moment. Whenever it came, she’d be there for him. She'd proven that she could now. Proven it to Leon, and to herself.