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“Woah! You’re the god of justice!? That’s so cool!” Apollo gushed excitedly. “You’re so cool! My dad is the absolute best!” He pumped his fist and ran circles around Zeus.
Zeus cracked a smile and lifted Apollo up via under his arms like he was a toddler. Apollo did not appreciate the (mis)treatment of himself and made a face like he was a particularly disgruntled cat.
Of course, this only served to amuse Zeus more, as offended animals were universally hilarious.
“This is not very justice of you, Mr justice god.” Apollo noted with his distaste being made very evident with his tone of voice.
The offending party merely sat Apollo on his lap, still holding him like a little child. “Yeah?” Zeus remarked with an underlying tone of humor, “and how would you know that, little mister not a justice god?”
Apollo bluffed, or at least tried to in this case. He needed some serious practice. “Well, actually, I am a justice god! It’s just that my domain of justice is in another pantheon, so you wouldn’t have met it.”
“Mhm.”
“Yes! As a matter of fact, I’ll go get it right now!” Apollo declared with confidence.
Zeus set him down, and eagerly awaited to see how Apollo would make good on his bluff. He sauntered away and eventually left Zeus’s line of sight, and Zeus decided to not use his divine powers in order to leave the suspense. His hand twitched.
An iris message popped up right in front of Zeus’s face. Zeus, having nothing better to do at the moment, decided to open the message in all his humility and grace as the King of Gods, and was immediately greeted by little Apollo’s tiny baby face covered in shadow, making him look almost sinister. Apollo whispered to Zeus as if conspiring with an enemy about a secret plan, and said, “psst, justice god. I need you to lend me your domain. A big bad and meanie god is bullying me and saying that I’m a weirdo freak, and I wanna prove him wrong.”
Zeus chuckled heartily.
“Hey!” Apollo exclaimed, feeling insulted, “This is a very serious matter regarding my honor!”
“Yes, yes of course. My apologies.” Zeus nodded, and willed his face to become solemn with much difficulty. Zeus granted Apollo sovereignty over the domain of justice, like he had asked, saying with a fully serious demeanor, “I have decided to fulfill your request, after much consideration, young godling. Make haste and prove to the masses that justice will be served”. Then he waved his hand over the iris message and dismissed it.
A few moments later, Apollo ran back into the room. He stopped a few paces short of Zeus and put his hands on his hips. “Do you feel the power of justice within mine essence now? Mine self hath proven thine wrong!” He said smugly, making sure to project his voice. Apollo was doing a rather bad job even pretending to be a dictator. He was no threat at all.
Zeus lightly rested his hand over his mouth to cover his smile. “Oh no! I have done such a great injustice to a being as great as you! I am so sorry!”
Apollo hump’ed. “Thoust art lucky that mine being is benevolent! This one shall accept an offering of ten…” he trailed off. “Ten… ambrosia cakes to make up for the major crime thou hast committed!” He declared with flair, pointing a finger at Zeus.
“Very well,” Zeus replied, “if it is ten ambrosia cakes a being as great as yourself wants, it is ten ambrosia cakes you shall get.”
Zeus magic-ed ten ambrosia cakes for Apollo’s pleasure and laid them out in front of him. “Here are the offerings you wanted, oh great justice god. This one hopes you find them to your satisfaction.”
Apollo wiggled his fingers like a damn cartoon character before magically cutting a slice for himself with a golden string and stuffing the slice in his mouth.
Before long, the ten ambrosia cakes all met their fated end, to disappear in Apollo’s seemingly unending stomach. He licked his lips and stated with much gusto, “Yes, yes. Your offerings have met my standards! Your sins are henceforth forgiven. Just make sure to not repeat the same mistake twice, or you’ll face even dire-er consequences!”
He teleported away in a show of light and confetti, of all things, which only served to fuel Zeus’s mirth.
