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Buck juggled 2 bags of groceries as he used his key to open Eddie’s front door. Upon stepping into the living room, he seemed to startle Eddie out of deeply contemplative state.
“Hey,” Eddie said as he jumped up and grabbed one of the grocery bags before following Buck into the kitchen. “What’s all this?” as he started emptying the bags and putting the groceries away.
“I’m trying a new recipe for dinner, and you agreed to be my guinea pig,” Buck reminded Eddie.
“Yeah, but this seems like a lot of groceries for just one meal.”
“Well, it’s also a few other things that I thought you needed,” Buck responded somewhat evasively.
After making quick work of putting away the groceries, they each grabbed a bottle of water before heading back to the living room and plopping on the sofa.
“So, what do you want to watch?” Eddie asked as he reached for the remote.
“Actually, do you mind if we just chat for a bit?”
“Is everything okay? I know you just worked that extra 12-hour shift at the 133.”
“Everything’s fine. While Mehta’s a bit formal, it was a relief to work under a normal captain. Of course, it helps that I didn’t try to kill him either.”
Eddie sighed before repeating what he’s told Buck multiple times. “You didn’t try to kill Gerard. Quite the opposite, you saved his life. Yes, he hit his head on the concrete but that’s a lot preferable to being decapitated by a flying saw!”
“Well anyway, the shift was fine.” Buck said, ignoring Eddie’s repeated reassurances. “On a separate topic, I’ve been thinking a lot about our call with Chris and your mom yesterday.”
Eddie visibly tensed. “What’s to think about? It’s clear my son hates me and will never forgive me.”
“He doesn’t hate you. He’s just being emotional and confused, and it doesn’t seem like your parents are helping the situation.” Buck took a deep breath. “Which is why I think we need to go down to El Paso and bring Chris home”.
As expected, Eddie vehemently objected. “I don’t want to force him to come home until he asks to do so. I owe him that much!”
Buck paused as he considered the best way to get through to Eddie. “Let me ask you something. On a scale of 1 to 10, how hard are your parents trying to help Chris and you reconcile?
“Assume a 10 would be doing everything they can to help both of you come together and heal. This might include arranging joint therapy sessions for you and Chris; helping Chris constructively work through his emotions and see your point of view; reinforcing that while they love having him in El Paso, his life is back in LA with his dad.
“Assume a 1 would be purposefully sabotaging your relationship with Chris. This might include constantly saying that you’re a lousy father and that you purposefully set out to hurt Chris. In other words, continuing to fan the flames of Chris’s anger at you while continuously stressing that Chris would be much happier staying permanently in El Paso.
“So, with that context, how would you rate your parents’ attempts to help you reconcile with your son?”
Eddie was quiet for a moment before begrudgingly saying, “I’d probably rate it a 2 or a 3.”
Buck was relieved to hear that, although he thought that rating might have even been a bit generous. But before he could discuss the implications, Eddie lamented, “But that might be what I deserve. Perhaps I’m just a bad father and aren’t worthy of reconciling with my son.”
Buck jumped in to stop Eddie from further spiraling. “I see. You think you’re a lousy parent, especially compared to your own wonderful parents. After all, they’ve been a bastion of unconditional love and support your entire life. They’ve always been fair in establishing constructive boundaries while simultaneously encouraging you to forge your own path in life.”
Eddie snorted loudly. “You know they’ve never been any of that for me. Not even close.”
“But you’ve consistently been all of that for Chris. That’s why you’re a better person and parent than them.”
Eddie forcefully shook his head. “Maybe I was before I traumatized him. Not now.”
Buck disagreed. “Yes, you made a mistake that accidentally hurt him. But that wasn’t your intent. Unlike your parents who’ve hurt you numerous times. Some of which were quite intentional.”
Buck pressed on. “Let me ask you a question. Think back to one of the times when your parents really hurt you. Perhaps when you were 12 and were being the ‘man of the house’ as your father demanded of you. From what you told me, you were making eggs for your sisters when you accidentally set off the smoke alarm. I recall hearing that your father berated you and grounded you for 2 weeks, making you miss an important baseball game. Would you have wanted to call your Abuela and beg her to come and bring you back to live with her in LA? Oh, and ask her to keep it a secret from your parents until after she arrived in El Paso.”
“I would’ve LOVED that,” Eddie admitted. “But Abuela would’ve never agreed to keep it a secret from my parents. And my parents would’ve never let me go live with her in LA. Instead, I would’ve been severely punished for even asking her.”
“So that proves two things. One is that Abuela has more class than either of your parents, who ambushed you with their arrival in LA. The second – and most important – is that you are a better parent than Helena and Ramone, since you let Chris go back to Texas with them so that he would have space to heal.”
“That may all be true,” conceded Eddie. “But my parents treat Chris a lot better than they treated me.”
“Okay, but right now they’re on their best behavior to entice Chris to stay permanently in El Paso. Once he starts school and fully settles in there, will they revert to old parenting habits?”
Buck paused to make sure he had Eddie’s full attention. “But that’s not the most important consideration. What matters most is where is Chris being best prepared to achieve his hopes and dreams for the future? Is it in El Paso where your ableist parents will limit him? Or here in LA where he’s being encouraged and equipped to soar?”
“Do you really think being in El Paso will limit his future in a meaningful way?” asked Eddie. “While the petty part of me wants to believe the worst of my parents, I need to be realistic.”
“Yes, I do. Their actions…or in some cases, inactions…are already hurting Chris. For example, we know that Chris needs to diligently work on his physical mobility. Here in LA, he has PT three times per week plus daily stretches and exercises at home. However, I know for a fact that, with your parents’ blessing, he’s been slacking off on that front since he arrived in El Paso. He’s also due for another surgery later his year or early next year. Will your parents actively support the need for that surgery, or will they put if off indefinitely because they don’t believe it’s required? While delaying that surgery will spare Chris short term pain, it will have serious detrimental effects on his long-term mobility and future independence.”
Buck paused and looked at Eddie, who appeared to be deep in thought. “Should I keep going?”
Eddie responded, “Yeah. I promise I’m listening.”
“Okay. Being in El Paso is already having similar adverse impacts on Chris’s mental health. Given your parents’ attitudes about therapy, Chris hasn’t been regularly speaking with a therapist. I believe that’s one reason why he’s still so mad at you. He hasn’t been able to constructively work through his feelings and emotions.
“Moving on, will your parents support Chris’s academic advancement? Here in LA, he’s on the AP track in most major subjects. Can your parents look beyond his CP to see how smart he is, or will they insist on holding him back in fear of him being overwhelmed?
“Finally, where will Chris have the most freedom to explore his own identify? Will your parents support and encourage him, even if his identity doesn’t conform to the narrow box they allowed you and your sisters?”
Eddie was quiet for a moment before admitting, “No question. Being here in LA is best for Chris and his future.”
Buck was thankful that Eddie agreed. “Okay, we need to start planning how to bring Chris home.” He looked Eddie in the eye before continuing. “Stop spiraling on how you don’t deserve Chris because of that one mistake. This isn’t about you! It’s about what’s best for Chris’s future. Frankly, if you let him sacrifice that future by staying in El Paso, you will be intentionally hurting him!”
“But you saw him on that video. It’s clear he doesn’t want to come home.”
“Yeah, I saw that. But you need to remember that while Chris has always been mature for his age, he’s still just a young teenager going through all that emotional adolescent angst. You may need to put your foot down to ensure he gets what he needs, which may be different from what he thinks he wants.”
Buck stopped and took note of the gob smacked expression on his friend’s face. “I’m going to go start dinner and give you time to think. Perhaps you can find a critical flaw in my logic on why it’s so important for Chris to return to LA.”
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Eddie sat on his couch in a complete daze, totally blown away by Buck’s impassioned arguments. He kept playing it over and over in his mind. Despite his best efforts, he was unable to poke holes in Buck’s logic for bringing Chris back to LA.
Buck was right. This was not about him and what he deserved for traumatizing Chris. This was only about what was best for Chris in the long term. And since he couldn’t rely on his parents to guide Chris to the right decision, he and Buck would have to intervene. (Not for the first time, Eddie ignored the implications of purposefully labeling Buck as his co-parent.)
Eddie pushed himself off the couch and into the kitchen, where Buck was chopping vegetables and adding spices to a baking pan filled with chicken breasts. A large pot of water appeared to be boiling on the stove. “Can I help?”
Buck looked over to him, seemingly trying to assess whether he was okay. “Can you add the pasta to the boiling water? I’m making a chicken ziti and veggie bake. Once the pasta is layered in, it’ll be ready to go into the oven. It’ll bake for an hour, which will give us time to continue our conversation.”
Eddie stirred the pasta and when ready, strained it into the colander. He then watched as Buck efficiently finished his preparations before putting the dish into the oven. Buck then started washing the various pans and utensils he’d used, so Eddie quickly grabbed a dishtowel to help him. As always, they worked seamlessly together, and he found the domestic routine soothing.
Buck looked up from scrubbing a pan. “So did I break your brain?”
Eddie chuckled, “According to Hen and Chim, that’s probably not possible since they claim we only share one brain cell.” He took a moment to gather his thoughts as he picked up a cutting board from the drainboard and started to dry it. “I thought about what you said, and I can’t fault your logic. We need to get Chris back to LA and the sooner, the better.”
He paused to put away the cutting board. “But I don’t know how we can make it happen. I don’t want to drag a screaming and kicking teenager onto a plane, nor do I want to put up with one in a car for over 11 hours. Plus, how do we convince my parents to let him go?”
“Those are all great questions” Buck said as he finished washing the pan, before stealing Eddie’s towel to dry his hands. “Fortunately, I’ve already set some things in motion to address them.”
“Of course you have,” Eddie said with a smile.
Buck returned the smile before saying “Let me just grab something from my car and I’ll fill you in.”
As Buck ran out to his car, Eddie couldn’t help thinking – for at least the umpteenth time – how lucky Chris and he were to have Buck in their lives.
A few moments later, Buck came back in the door with his duffle bag over his shoulder. “You’re staying overnight?”
“Yeah, if that’s okay with you.”
Before Buck could start doubting himself, Eddie was quick to reassure him “Of course. You’re always welcome and I love having you here.”. Eddie was happy to see the smile cross Buck’s face. “But is there a special reason why you’re staying here tonight? And will Tommy be okay with it?”
“Yes, there’s a reason which I’ll explain in a few minutes. And don’t worry about Tommy.”
“I do worry that I’m coming between the two of you. That all the time you’re spending with me is causing issues in your relationship.”
“Please don’t worry about that. Tommy understands the close nature of our friendship. Plus, Tommy and I aren’t yet at a point - and I’m not sure we ever will be – where we have a monopoly on each other’s free time.”
“Is everything okay between you two?”
“Honestly, I’m not sure. After very casually dating for about 5 months, we’re now at a crossroads. Do we become more serious and committed to each other? Or do we move on and hope that we can remain friends? Given how little we have in common beyond our profession, I’m not sure that I see a future with him. I guess I have a lot of thinking to do.”
“Well, please let me know if I can help, even if it’s just to be a sounding board. I want to be here for you like you’ve been for me.”
“Thanks, Eds, I appreciate it. Now, before we start planning, I have a gift for you.” Buck pulled out a wrapped present out of his duffel and handed it to Eddie.
Eddie was perplexed why Buck was giving him a gift since it wasn’t his birthday, but he opened it and immediately burst out laughing. Buck had given him a clipboard with his name neatly labeled at the top and a pad attached beneath the clip. Once he looked up, Buck was handing him another package which turned out to be an assortment of colored pens.
“Thanks, I think. Should I be grateful that you didn’t bedazzle my name on the clipboard?”
“Hey, I can if you want me to, Edmundo,” Buck smugly said with a smile. “You know I bought all that equipment for Jee.”
“No thanks!” Eddie quickly retorted.
Buck then pulled out his own clipboard, blatantly ignoring Eddie’s smirk. He then continued in a more serious tone. “As outlined on the first page of your clipboard, I see three topics that our “Operation: Rescue Chris” plan needs to cover.”
“Wait, that’s what we’re calling this plan?” Eddie incredulously asked.
“Why, do you have a better name?”
“Nope,” assured Eddie. He honestly didn’t care what they called the plan as long as long as it worked.
“As I was saying, our plan needs to address three topics. The first is making Chris willing to come back to LA, even if he’s doing it reluctantly. The second is ensuring that your parents don’t stand in the way. The third is figuring out all the logistics.” Buck explained. “Am I missing anything?”
Eddie thought for a minute. “No, I think that covers it. The first item will be the most challenging although the second probably won’t be easy.”
“Agreed. Which we have an appointment with your family practice lawyer at 9 am tomorrow. Which is also why I’m staying overnight.”
“You made us an appointment with my lawyer?” Eddie asked, then internally cringed as an expression of uncertainty crossed Buck’s face.
“Um, I’m sorry if that’s overstepping,” Buck hesitantly replied. “I can cancel it if you want.”
Eddie quickly assured Buck. “No, that’s fine. You just surprised me. You’re right. We should see the lawyer ASAP to anticipate and shoot down any roadblocks from my parents, so thank you for setting it up.” He was relieved to see the doubt fade from Buck’s eyes. “Do we have a list of questions or topics we want to review with the lawyer?”
“I have a draft list we can review after dinner. So, after the lawyer’s appointment we need to head back here to prepare for our lunch guests.”
“What lunch guests?” asked Eddie. He loved Buck’s enthusiasm, but his head was starting to spin.
As always, Buck appeared to be in tune with how he was feeling. He paused before looking Eddie directly in the eyes and saying, “I’m sorry if I’m steamrolling you. I’m just feeling a strong sense of urgency to get Chris back to LA as quickly as possible.”
Eddie took Buck’s hands as he said “While I admit to being a bit confused, you’re not steamrolling me. I love that you’re all in on getting Chris home. Please just give me a few minutes to catch up. Now, who is coming for lunch and why?”
Buck took a deep breath and explained. “Athena, Bobby, Hen, and Karen are coming for lunch at noon. I thought they could help us brainstorm ideas for getting Chris to agree to come back to LA. They always provide great advice, and I thought they could be especially helpful, since they’re parents of teenagers plus they all know Chris well. If worse comes to worse, we may even need to coopt Denny and/or Harry to help get through to Chris.”
“Makes a lot of sense.” Eddie assured Buck. He did think it was a great idea to get input from their friends and he appreciated Buck proactively making it happen. “So, what do we need to do in terms of food prep for tomorrow’s lunch? I assume those were the extra groceries that you brought over.”
“Yeah, they were. I’m keeping the menu simple. I figured we’d have chicken salad on crusty baguettes. I’m going to cook up the chicken breasts this evening after dinner. That will give them time to cool in the fridge overnight, and I’ll make the chicken salad in the morning before we head out to the lawyer. Bobby’s going to bring his pasta salad and Hen’s going to bring a tossed salad. Oh yeah, and Athena’s going to bring her caramel brownies for dessert.”
“I know the purpose of this lunch is to plan, but that menu sounds amazing.” Eddie’s stomach growled loudly, as if to punctuate his words.
Buck chuckled as he stood up. “Fortunately, dinner should be just about ready,” as he headed into the kitchen, with Eddie following closely behind.
After a delicious dinner, Eddie grabbed his clipboard so that they could review Buck’s draft list of questions for the lawyer. He sat at the kitchen table reading them aloud to Buck, who was working at the counter washing and seasoning the chicken breasts.
Most of the questions appeared relatively straightforward. The list included such questions as do Helena and Ramone have any additional or implied custodial rights simply because Chris lived with them for a few months over the summer? Is Chris still considered to be a LA resident, so that any custody application would have to go through family court in LA? What actions, if any, could Helena or Ramone legally take to prevent them from taking Chris home to LA?
It wasn’t until Eddie got down to the final question on the list, that he did a double take. He closed his eyes, positive that he’d misread the question. But when he reopened them, the wording didn’t change.
“You okay there Edmundo?” Buck snickered. “I assume you got to the final question.”
“Yeah. What do you mean by, ‘would it provide further legal protection if we got married and you adopted Chris?’
“It means exactly what it says. It’s a drastic step, but I think we should at least ask your lawyer how much additional protection that would provide Chris from a legal perspective.” Buck paused. “I know it’s likely not something you’d want to do, especially since I know you’re straight and this would obviously impact your ability to date. But if the lawyer says it could help, I would absolutely be willing to do it.”
Eddie was stunned. He couldn’t believe that Buck would be willing to make that sacrifice for him. He would personally be fine with marrying Buck. Not only was he never dating again after all the trauma he’d caused, he also wasn’t straight. He wasn’t quite ready to share that with Buck since he was still working through defining his sexuality in his therapy sessions with Frank.
“Buck, I can’t let you make that sacrifice. What about your relationship with Tommy, or if not him, other people you might want to date?”
Buck dried his hands before sitting down at the kitchen table, looking directly at Eddie. “Eds, you and Chris are the most important people in the world to me, and always will be. Tommy barely even makes it into the top 10.”
“Out of curiosity, who else is on that list above Tommy?”
“Jee, Maddie, Bobby, Athena, Hen, Karen, Chimney.”
Eddie was blown away by the depth of Buck’s love and support. He knew that this wasn’t the time to explore the implications of that love, so he simply replied “Ok, let’s keep that question on the list for the lawyer.”
Later that evening as Eddie was drifting off to sleep, he was comforted by the soft snores coming from Buck on the living room couch. Unlike his despair the previous night after that disastrous birthday party, thanks to Buck, he felt hopeful that they might be one small step closer to bringing Chris home.