Chapter Text
“Ow.”
The small, athletic girl with the pouty mouth winced as her physiotherapist pressed against the side of her hips, stretching the stiff muscles from her twisted position.
“This wouldn’t hurt so much if you did your exercises like I told you, Gahyun,” the physiotherapist muttered. The girl, Gahyun, scowled.
“I do my exercises! I just have a conspiracy theory that you deliberately hurt me further during our sessions so that you can get more business out of me,” Gahyun huffed. The physiotherapist rolled her eyes.
“You act like you haven’t been back on the diamond for a year now because of me, after your injury,” she muttered, but she was still a bit more gentle helping Gahyun with her next set of stretches. “Besides, it’s not like I have a private practice. The hospital pays me a salary. You know that. I couldn’t squeeze more money out of you even if I wanted to.”
“Which I still find ridiculous, by the way. Aren’t you super sought after, now? Olympians seek you out for physio these days, for gods sake. You could be making bank if you started your own practice,” Gahyun pointed out.
“Yeah but, then I’d only be able to help people who can pay out of pocket. I want accessibility to be… accessible,” the physiotherapist stated.
“I guess I shouldn’t complain. This way even an amateur baseball player like me still gets to use your services,” Gahyun sighed, and then sucked in a breath as she was made to hold a difficult pose.
“Even though I apparently hurt you on purpose?” the physiotherapist grinned, releasing the stretch.
“I’ll have to deal with it. You are probably the best available, after all,” Gahyun relented, tilting side to side to test out her range of movement. Unsurprisingly, there was no pain, and she felt more limber than she had in weeks.
That’s because Kim Bora, the physiotherapist she had started seeing after her injury over a year ago, really was as good as people said. It wasn’t just the stretches and massages and exercises that she put her patients through. Bora had a very holistic approach to her physiotherapy. She even wrote a thesis back in school on how most injuries could be recovered from faster and even avoided if the mind was perfectly in tune with the body. It received acclaim.
That meant that Bora would go out of her way to find out stresses in her patients’ lives and try to help solve them as part of her therapy, and if it was beyond her means, she would get them in touch with the hospital’s psychotherapist, who also happened to be her roommate, Kim Yoohyeon.
For Gahyun specifically, though it was a sports injury, Bora kept noticing other injuries showing up on Gahyun’s body while she was under treatment. After gentle prodding, she figured out Gahyun was in an abusive relationship, and one day she followed Gahyun out of the hospital, and when Gahyun was being picked up by this abusive partner, Bora decked them in the face and told them if they went near Gahyun ever again, she would call the cops.
Bora nearly lost her job, but the abusive partner dropped all charges after public support for the badass physiotherapist that stood up for her patient. It helped that Gahyun was also a beauty influencer on the side, and was considered “women’s baseball’s little sweetheart”. Gahyun and Bora were close friends ever since.
“You wouldn’t need my help at all if you did your exercises,” Bora scolded.
“I told you, I do!” Gahyun whined.
“Then why do you text me every few weeks with yet another pulled groin,” Bora scoffed.
“I don’t know, maybe because I’m just a hard-working athlete?” Gahyun shrugged.
“Or, hear me out,” Bora started, “You’re pushing yourself too hard because you feel like you have the reputation of all of Korean Women’s Baseball on your shoulders.”
Gahyun pouted. She had to admit, because of her cute looks and personality, she had drawn a lot of attention to the sport, and it was important, because women still didn’t have a professional league for baseball in Korea. If she showed women could play a hard an exciting game on top of being cute, it would make big strides in getting the league recognized.
“You’re doing it again,” Gahyun accused.
“Doing what?”
“Psychoanalyzing me,” Gahyun huffed.
“I’m just… pointing out some observations I’ve made as your physiotherapist and your friend,” Bora stated. “Since I can’t punch the entire Korea Baseball Association, can you at least talk to Yoohyeon about it at some point?”
“Fine,” Gahyun pouted. “But only because I don’t think you should get into the habit of solving every problem by punching people.”
“It was the only time. And they deserved it,” Bora muttered, looking at the scar on her middle finger from where her ring had cut into her skin from punching so hard. “Alright. You’re cleared for today. I gotta get going so grab your things and make sure you sign out this time.”
“Geez, you’re in a hurry. I thought we could grab Yoohyeon and get some food,” Gahyun frowned, but then she caught sight of Bora’s badge around her neck, and it had twisted around so she could see the photocard of a certain idol tucked in behind it. “Oh that’s right! It’s the JiU concert tonight, right?”
Bora’s expression exploded in a grin.
“Yeah. It’s finally here,” Bora nodded.
“Didn’t you tell me you have a meet and greet ticket for the first time?” Gahyun questioned. “How are you not freaking out?”
“I am. Internally,” Bora admitted. Gahyun sighed, placing a hand on Bora’s shoulder.
“I just have to say, it was an honour to know you,” Gahyun lamented. Bora scoffed, pushing Gahyun’s hand off of her.
“I’ll be fine,” Bora assured. Gahyun raised her eyebrow.
“Haven’t you had a big lesbian crush on her since she debuted?” Gahyun questioned.
“Shh,” Bora warned, looking around. “Are you trying to get me fired?”
“Sorry,” Gahyun stiffened, looking apologetic. When she had found out Bora was gay, she hadn’t bat an eye, but she knew that wouldn’t be the reality for everyone. Bora looked relieved that no one else getting therapy seemed to be paying them any attention.
“And okay yes, but,” Bora let out a sigh. “I’m not in my early twenties anymore. I’ve… matured. I’m going to meet someone who I admire a lot and I’m going to be very normal about it. That’s all.”
Gahyun eyed Bora suspiciously as they started heading out toward the front desk.
“Uh huh,” Gahyun smirked. “So how long do you think you’ll last before you blurt out that you want her to be your wife?”
“Gahyun,” Bora scowled.
“And then to your surprise she accepts because in the sea of all her fans, you are the prettiest girl she’s ever seen~,” Gahyun teased.
“Okay, don’t feed my delusions,” Bora grumbled. Gahyun chuckled as she reached the sign out sheet, and she filled it out while Bora nodded to the receptionist.
“Yoohyeon has been giving you lectures about staying realistic, hasn’t she?” Gahyun sighed, putting the pen down. “Bora, just enjoy the night. Who cares if she’s a celebrity. I know how much you like her. Don’t let your worries about expectations versus reality keep you from being in the moment.”
“Oh I won’t. This is a dream come true for me. Even if I’m just another face among hundreds of thousands that will fade from her memory as soon as I’m out of sight, I just want her to know that she has made such a big impact on my life,” Bora explained as they walked through the hospital doors.
“Alright, just make sure I’m invited to the wedding,” Gahyun teased, making Bora roll her eyes. “Seriously though, I want to grab lunch with you and Yoohyeon soon. Then you can show me all your fancams. I assume you’re dragging Yoohyeon along with you?”
“Obviously,” Bora grinned. “She pretends like she doesn’t care but I’ve heard her singing JiU songs when she’s not paying attention.”
“Then I hope you both have fun,” Gahyun expressed. “And if you have a minute in your fangirling, tell JiU to tell her management team to get back to me about doing a collab for my beauty vlogs. Thank you.”
Bora rolled her eyes again.
“I’ll do my best.”
Bora had been doing pretty well all day.
But putting on her makeup, knowing she was mere hours from being in the same room as JiU for her concert, and then not long after that, being face-to-face with her…
She had to reapply her mascara many times.
“Shit,” Bora swore, trying to fix her mistake from her shaking hands. She was going for a heavy, dark makeup pallet. She had to. It was a JiU concert. She was the dark princess of pop rock.
“Bora, come on, we have to get going soon if you want to hit the merch booth early,” Yoohyeon’s voice came from outside the bathroom.
“I know, I know. Just… gimme a second,” Bora muttered, trying her best to salvage her clumpy eyelashes. She didn’t care if JiU was only going to see her for maybe a minute at best. She was going to look hot as hell for that minute, dammit.
Yoohyeon appeared in the doorway to see Bora wiping of a couple of streaks of mascara next to her eye. Yoohyeon let out a sigh.
“Here. Let me,” Yoohyeon offered, grabbing a wet wipe and tilting Bora’s chin up at her. She started dabbing the inky splotch off Bora’s skin. “Remember. JiU is just a person. Like you or me.”
“I know,” Bora muttered. “A very talented, pretty, kind, strong, hardworking, ethereal person. I just want to make a good impression. It’s my one chance. I… wouldn’t mind standing out, even if just for a second.”
“I admit she makes good music, but I want to remind you, if it doesn’t go exactly as you want, it’s not the end of the world,” Yoohyeon stated, now helping Bora apply her mascara. “I know she’s been important to you, but she might not be exactly what you imagined her to be, and that’s okay.”
“I’m not dumb. I know she’s been trained to show a certain, perfect side of herself to the public. But… I’ve been following her career since the beginning. I get the feeling she’s a genuinely good person who has earned everything she has,” Bora gushed. Yoohyeon let out another sigh, doing the other eye.
“I really am happy for you. I know how important she is for you. But that’s… part of why I want you to keep your expectations low. You’ve told me before that when you were younger, she’s who kept you going. If you end up having a negative experience, I don’t want that colouring all your experiences you’ve had healing,” Yoohyeon explained. She took the tube of lipstick that she assumed Bora wanted to apply and started putting that on for her, as well.
“Ha hank ooh hink eh ill ee a he hahiv eh here he huh?”
Yoohyeon pulled away, her brow furrowed.
“Pardon?”
Bora pressed her lips together, evening out the deep red wine shade, and releasing her lips with a pop.
“What makes you think it’ll be a negative experience?” Bora repeated.
“Nothing, really. It’s just, you have an image of her built up in your head. She could be tired after the concert and seeing so many other fans, so she might not be as nice as you want her to be,” Yoohyeon shrugged. “Plus… isn’t she close friends with that rapper, Dami?”
Bora raised her eyebrow.
“What’s her friendship with Dami have to do with anything?” Bora questioned.
“I dunno, it’s just, Dami always seems to act so hard on stage and she’s always so flippant. I get the whole idea of going against what the public wants in terms of diminutive female acts but she just comes off as an asshole. I can’t imagine anyone who puts up with her has a super squeaky clean personality themselves,” Yoohyeon argued.
“Wow, judgy, much,” Bora scoffed. “That’s just her stage persona. You don’t know how she is behind the scenes.”
“And that goes for JiU, too,” Yoohyeon countered, deflecting. “You don’t know what she’s like behind the scenes.”
“Yeah, but… that’s part of what I’m excited to find out. To see a glimpse of it. Good or bad, I want to know. I want to see behind the curtain of someone who has shaped me for the past 9 years of my life. Is that so wrong?” Bora inquired. Yoohyeon rested her arm against the bathroom counter, squinting, looking deep in thought.
“No. It’s not wrong. I know you’ve got a good head on your shoulders and are fairly grounded in reality. It’s just…” Yoohyeon looked over at Bora carefully, “are you sure you want to come out to her?”
Bora took a deep breath.
“Yes. I need her to know just the kind of impact she’s had on my life.”
Around the time JiU had debuted, Bora came out to her parents. They didn’t take it well, and had thrown her out with no food, money, or shelter. Bora survived the best she could, and she was inspired by this new idol on the scene that was the same age as her – a beautiful, strong, badass concept with the kindness of a princess and the swagger of a demonic empress.
Her music pushed Bora, kept her going from one day to the next, to fight back against her circumstances, all for a chance to hear her belt in a new song or see her smile on a tv in the window of some shop.
Bora had gotten a scholarship, went to university, ended up rooming with Yoohyeon, and the rest was history.
That’s why Bora always cited JiU as her biggest inspiration. It’s why she keeps JiU’s photo card close to her heart on her badge while she works. She wouldn’t be where she was today without her.
“Bora… I don’t think it’s a good idea,” Yoohyeon warned.
“Why not? What’s the worst that can happen?” Bora questioned.
“The worst? She says or does something that invalidates your existence. We don’t know her stance on the LGBTQ community. Considering how important she’s been for your journey, it could be devastating for you, no matter how you feel about it,” Yoohyeon debated. She shook her head, looking at Bora with understanding. “Listen. As a bisexual woman, I empathize. It’s natural to want to be accepted by people important to you. But… JiU accepting you isn’t going to make up for your parents not accepting you.”
Bora stiffened.
“Low blow,” Bora glowered. “This is what I get for having a psychologist as a best friend.”
“As if you can talk,” Yoohyeon argued. “Not too long ago, Gahyun texted me saying she wanted to talk about the pressures of having the fate of the entirety of Korean Women’s baseball in her hands sometime. You said something to her, didn’t you?”
“Someone had to say it! She’s going to strain her body beyond what I can fix one of these days!” Bora huffed.
“Or maybe you just put the thought in her head and now it’s going to make it way worse, ever thought about that?” Yoohyeon glared.
“Like you putting it in my head that I’m trying to use JiU’s love to replace the love of my parents?” Bora pouted.
“That’s not—” Yoohyeon pinched the bridge of her nose and exhaled deeply. “I just want you to be aware of the implications of what you’re doing. That’s all.”
“I’m an adult, Yoohyeon. I’m aware,” Bora claimed firmly. “She’s someone I look up to, yes, but I know to her I’m just a fan. I won’t be putting more stock into this interaction than that. Okay?”
“Alright, alright,” Yoohyeon raised her hands. “Just don’t pass out on me during this concert. I will carry you home on my shoulders but I’ll also complain about it the whole way.”
“No promises,” Bora smirked, knowing that she could think about it objectively now, but if JiU so much as looked in her direction during the concert, she wouldn’t be able to stop her heart from fluttering. “Thanks for helping with my makeup. Let me just grab something and we’ll get going.”
Bora pushed her way out of the bathroom and headed to her bedroom, where she went to her side table and pulled out the drawer. She reached in, picking up a drawing she had done years ago of JiU, back when she still had time to draw. It was laminated, keeping it pristine as the day she drew it, and she hugged it to herself. As low as she was keeping her expectations, she really hoped JiU would be able to accept this art. It expressed more than her own words ever could.
“What’s that?” Yoohyeon questioned, poking her head around the corner.
“Drawing I want to give JiU,” Bora admitted. “Unless there’s some psychological reason I shouldn’t give her this?”
Yoohyeon rolled her eyes.
“No, you’re fine. Come on, app says the Uber is going to be here any minute,” Yoohyeon urged, disappearing from view.
Bora looked down at the drawing again and gave it one more hug.
She couldn’t believe it.
She was really going to meet JiU.
They hadn’t been able to get barricade, so they were far back quite a bit, too far back to be involved in any sort of audience interaction. But it was still an amazing show. Bora had been to several JiU concerts over the years, and they always blew her away.
The pyrotechnics, the theatrics, the dancing, the very live vocals, and she was even hilarious and engaging while talking to the audience in between songs. She was really the perfect entertainer. Bora had given up on filming with her phone after the first few songs, just from shaking so much. As much as she had matured, she couldn’t help but fall back into that awestruck fangirl once in JiU’s presence.
She was sure Yoohyeon captured some good footage of her favourite songs, anyway, based on how Yoohyeon was actually letting herself let loose for once and enjoy the concert. Though Bora did catch her scowling when Dami was brought out as a surprise guest for a few of the songs she had featured on. Bora really didn’t know what Yoohyeon had against Dami.
That was far from her mind though, once she was in line for the meet and greet. Yoohyeon had wished her good luck and then she was herded away like cattle. She was pretty far down the line, but with how fast the line was actually moving, it was a reminder of what little time she was actually going to have in front of JiU.
She was shaking.
“Get it together, Bora,” she muttered to herself under her breath. If her voice was too busy shaking for her to say anything, she would waste her opportunity. If she was going to stand out in JiU’s mind even for a moment, it would not be for something embarrassing.
She closed her eyes and breathed.
She was just a human.
Just a person with a job.
A job she was good at. That’s all.
Bora considered herself an extrovert. She was good with people. Good with first impressions. She just had to be herself.
She touched the stiff paper that she had tucked away in her jacket, and had protected throughout the concert, even when she was jumping around wildly.
“Keep the line moving!”
The sound of the staff member yelling made Bora snap her eyes open just in time for someone to push her forward. Bora mumbled an apology, not realizing how much of a gap she had left in the line.
If she was planning on not being embarrassing, she wasn’t doing a very good job of it.
But she felt a bit more relaxed, at least until the curtain game into view. It was funny. She also often worked behind a curtain with a patient at the hospital, usually to give a patient privacy to help them with certain stretches, or if they needed ultrasound therapy.
Now she was preparing to walk behind another curtain for privacy, for her moment with JiU.
A staff member nearby yelled to have whatever people wanted signed out and ready, one item per person.
Bora pulled out her drawing, though she didn’t intend to have it signed. She intended to give it for JiU to keep. She hoped that would be okay. It didn’t seem like anyone else had a gift for JiU.
There was a chance her drawing would just end up in a trash bin.
That would be okay.
She convinced herself that would be okay.
There were only three people in front of her now.
Two.
She was just a person.
One.
Just a person doing a job.
“Next.”
Bora took a deep breath and walked through the curtain.
As mentioned, Bora had been to several JiU concerts before. So she knew that JiU was somehow even more beautiful in person. But up close like this? The long dark hair? The lacey and sparkly dress? The shining doe eyes?
She couldn’t be real.
Contain your gay, Bora. You only have one shot.
Bora broke out into a friendly smile, and bowed.
“Hi! I’m Bora,” Bora greeted. JiU broke into a wide smile herself, and even though Bora could tell it was practiced, there was a warmth behind it.
“Hi, Bora! I’m JiU!”
She said my name. She said my name.
“Oh, yes, I know,” Bora sputtered. Dumbass.
“You’re so pretty!” JiU grinned as she looked Bora over.
Ohmygodohmygodohmygod—
“Gosh, thank you. I mean, means a lot, coming from you,” Bora gestured toward the idol.
Stop flirting
“Aw, thank you,” JiU giggled. “Did you enjoy the concert?”
“Absolutely! Even my friend who is usually a stick in the mud enjoyed it,” Bora confirmed.
JiU let out a laugh as beautiful as her singing.
“Glad to hear it! Life’s too short to not allow yourself the little joys in life, don’t you think?” JiU pondered, the most beautiful smile on her face.
Bora’s brain stalled.
“Yeah,” Bora breathed out, completely mesmerized. JiU formed a bemused smile, seeming to notice.
“Do you want me to sign that?” JiU inquired, throwing Bora a lifeline. It worked, since Bora snapped out of it.
“Oh. No. I actually… made this. For you,” Bora held it out toward her. This caught the attention of a nearby staff member.
“No gifts,” they said shortly.
Bora’s heart started to sink, but JiU held up her hand.
“It’s fine. May I see?” JiU asked politely, looking curious. Bora smiled gratefully and handed the drawing over, trying to ignore that her hands were visibly shaking.
When JiU looked at the drawing, her jaw popped open with a gasp.
“You drew this?” JiU looked up at Bora, and her eyes seemed watery from emotion. “It’s beautiful. Thank you. I’ll treasure it always.”
Bora could’ve started crying, but she was too in shock to do so.
“I’m… I’m very happy you like it,” Bora mumbled bashfully. JiU looked at the drawing again and let out a wistful sigh before putting it aside.
“Um,” JiU started looking around. “I don’t want you to leave empty handed. Uh, here.”
JiU grabbed a photo of hers from a pile nearby, which was probably there for people like Bora who hadn’t brought anything to sign. She popped the cap of a pen with her teeth (which made Bora’s brain short circuit), and she quickly signed her name, then held it out.
“I’m really glad I got to meet you today, Bora. I hope maybe one day we can meet again,” JiU expressed as Bora took the photo while reforming the synapses in her brain.
“Okay, move along,” the staff member ordered, and Bora snapped back to reality.
“Wait, I really wanted to tell you—”
“We have to keep the line moving,” the staff member barked, and started pushing Bora’s shoulder.
Something switched in JiU as she dropped her friendly air and she glared at the staff member intensely.
“Don’t touch her,” JiU snapped, and then she softened again, looking back at Bora. “What were you going to say?”
Bora felt startled for a moment, feeling like she just saw a glance behind JiU’s mask. There was someone there who had a fire in her, but not out of bitterness or spite. It had the feeling of being fiercely protective. It reminded Bora of how she drew her.
“Uh, I was gonna say…” Bora took a deep breath. This was it. “I was gonna say that you and your music really helped me when my parents kicked me out for being gay, so, thank you. I’m in a much better place now, and if it weren’t for you, I don’t think I would have made it this far.”
JiU’s expression changed, but not into a look of disgust like Bora usually got. Instead, her exterior seemed to melt completely, and she pouted, her eyes filling with tears. Real tears.
“I’m honoured I was able to be with you through such a hard time. I’m so happy you’re still around and thriving. It means the world to me,” JiU sighed, and then she held out her hand and made a grabby motion toward the signed photo. “Can I have that back for a second?”
“Ma’am, we really need to keep the line moving,” the staff member warned.
“I know. Please. Just a few more seconds. This is important,” JiU stated, taking the photo and scribbling something else on it. She gave Bora a soft smile. “Please don’t blame the staff too much. They just want to get home at a timely manner like anyone else with a job.”
“I understand. Sorry I took up so much of your time,” Bora’s throat bobbed with emotion. JiU shook her head, handing the photo back.
“I wish we could talk more, honestly. This format doesn’t really allow for in depth conversations, sadly,” JiU sighed. “Just… know I’m always rooting for you, okay, Bora?”
“Okay,” Bora breathed, and she bowed again, and bowed her way backward out of the room. “Thank you. Thank you so much. Have a good tour!”
“Get home safe!” was that last thing Bora heard JiU say as the curtain fell in front of her.
And then it was over.
Bora was guided out in a daze, gripping the photo in such a way that creased the edges, something she would curse herself for later.
She was trying desperately to hold onto everything that happened, replaying it in her mind with perfect detail, so that she wouldn’t forget a thing. It was hard, because every time she would think of JiU’s smile, and the way it creased her eyes, her brain would buzz. Everything was starting to feel like a blur. But she wouldn’t forget. She wouldn’t allow herself to forget. Not one second.
She was so focused that she hadn’t realized Yoohyeon had found her wandering aimlessly until she was tapping on Bora’s cheeks.
“Earth to Bora,” Yoohyeon called, inches from her face. “You look, uh… disoriented. How did it go?”
Bora blinked a couple of times, and then she melted into a silly grin with tired eyes.
“She’s amazing, Yoohyeon,” Bora breathed. “She made me actually feel valued as an individual. Like she actually appreciated me personally, like I wasn’t just some face in the crowd. And before you say she was trained to be like that with everyone – I don’t care. Let me have this.”
“I would never,” Yoohyeon shook her head, and she really looked relieved. “I’m glad you had a good experience.”
“She called me pretty, Yooh! Me! When she’s her!” Bora gaped.
“Well you are pretty, so it’s good that she has eyes,” Yoohyeon chuckled. “Did you… tell her? What you wanted to?”
“Yeah. I told her. I almost didn’t get to, but she made sure I had my moment,” Bora mused.
“And how’d she react?” Yoohyeon questioned, curious.
“She almost seemed like she wanted to cry? And then she told me… she was happy I’m still here,” Bora beamed. “It might’ve been a generic sentiment, but… it felt like she meant it. And to me it meant the world.”
“That’s great. Honestly. I know I came off like a grump but I really was just worried she wouldn’t be as good as you thought she was. I’m glad she was,” Yoohyeon sighed, and spied the paper in Bora’s hands. “That from her?”
“This? Oh, yes. She signed it for me, since I didn’t have anything to sign for her of my own,” Bora explained, and then her eyes widened. “That’s right! She wrote something else, after I told her I’m gay.”
“What’d she write?” Yoohyeon inquired, tilting her head.
“I haven’t looked yet,” Bora frowned. “I’m nervous.”
“What are you nervous for? She’s already exceeded your expectations as it is,” Yoohyeon urged. “She wrote a message just for you. Aren’t you curious?”
“Yeah… yeah,” Bora nodded. “Okay. Here I go.”
Bora looked down at the photo. There was the pretty, cursive squiggles of her signature, the signature JiU had written herself, while the pen cap was trapped between her teeth.
And underneath, a short message that she had written in a hurry, just for her.
Bora,
You’re perfect exactly how you are
I won’t forget you
Bora fell to the ground, sobbing.
2 Months Later
“Dongie, do me a favour and always come with me on my shows abroad.”
Minji, better known among the public as her stage name JiU, sat in a chair while her stylist Handong was sprucing up her hair.
“Not my fault you happened to book a bunch of international dates when I was busy with other bookings,” Handong muttered, masterfully curling a strand of hair so it cascaded as a perfect wave outlining the side of Minji’s head.
Handong was considered a triple threat among stylists. She did hair, makeup, and clothes. She didn’t parade it around or anything, but Minji was her clear favourite to work with. She had a lot of fun styling Minji, and it helped that she got along with the experienced idol as well. They had been close friends for years now.
“Well, keep your schedule clear from now on. I need you,” Minji grinned, and Handong let out a light laugh.
“Oh, I know you do. I saw some pictures from your tour stops. Who put you in a plaid cape? You looked like a picnic blanket,” Handong scoffed.
“I didn’t want to hurt their feelings and say no,” Minji whined. Handong shook her head.
“It’s your image, you know. You should have the final say on what you look like,” Handong scolded. “Luckily, I would never make an atrocious mistake like that, so you never have to worry about telling me no.”
“Which is exactly why you’re so important to the team!” Minji sighed. “I’m just glad I was able to book you for this event. I timed the tour so I would be back in Seoul in time for this variety concert but I didn’t know if someone else already nabbed you.”
“Don’t tell anyone, but I did in fact keep my schedule clear in case you asked,” Handong smirked.
“Please just be my fulltime stylist at this point,” Minji sighed.
“I’ll consider it,” Handong grinned. “I do have the most fun styling you, after all. You might piss off some other people in the industry if you hog me to yourself, though.”
“Their loss for not pouncing on you when they had the chance,” Minji giggled. “Seriously, Dongie. Next time I’m on tour abroad, you’re coming with me. Nobody gets my aesthetic like you do. I feel most myself on stage when you style me.”
“Alright. We’ll meet soon and draft up a contract,” Handong agreed. “Just because you’re my friend doesn’t mean I’ll let you take advantage of me.”
“I’ll make sure my team pays you what you’re worth, I promise,” Minji claimed.
“Of that I have no doubt,” Handong snickered, touching up Minji’s hair a bit more. “It was probably inevitable I’d end up being your exclusive stylist. I took a risk waiting on you, you know. I’m surprised you decided to participate in this show right after getting back from tour. All that travelling around. A show almost every other night. Aren’t you tired?”
“I can handle one more show,” Minji smiled. “It’s a nice way for my Korean fans to welcome me back. Especially since I’ll probably be in the studio with Siyeon the next little while so my fans won’t see me for a bit.”
“Your dedication is impressive as always,” Handong sighed.
“It’s not like I’m not tired. But I’ve found… renewed vigor, recently,” Minji mused.
“Enjoy that. Not everyone who has been in a job for 9 straight years can so easily escape burnout,” Handong sighed.
“Yeah. I’m grateful,” Minji mumbled, looking down at her phone in her lap. She unlocked it and went into her albums, picking out a picture she had favourited.
It was a picture she had taken of some artwork given to her by a fan. She stared at it, the way her body was posed, her expression drawn, the detail, down to the ruffles in her clothes and the tone in her arms. She felt that vigor return.
“What’s that?” Handong questioned.
“It’s a drawing of me a fan gave me a while ago,” a smile tugged at Minji’s lips. “The real one is hung up on a wall back at my place. I took a picture on my phone so I can look at it… whenever. I’ve made it a habit of looking at it before any show, now.”
“That much of an impact, huh?” Handong pondered, looking over Minji’s shoulder to view it more closely. “It’s a cool drawing. You have a talented fan.”
“Yeah. I like it a lot. It’s not… pretty,” Minji smiled.
“Wow, way to roast your fan,” Handong chuckled.
“No! That’s not what I meant! The art itself is gorgeous,” Minji clarified. “It’s the way she drew me. Like I’m not just something… pretty to look at. I look strong. Confident. Almost… reliable, like I’d be able to do anything and I know it.”
“Yeah, I get that vibe. You can tell she put a lot of thought into it. Styling and drawing is just art of a different medium. It kind of looks like she drew you the way I try to style you. It’s impressive, considering I’ve known you for several years, but she seems to have clocked you pretty well beyond what people think of your idol image,” Handong nodded approvingly.
“If just one fan sees me like this, it’s all worth it,” Minji sighed. “That, and she told me I helped her through a very hard time. Just by existing. Seeing her art of me… it’s easy to see how she found strength. I’m not sure I deserve it, but I’m honoured all the same. I… wish I had gotten to talk to her more about it. About what she sees in me.”
“Sounds like you should’ve gotten her number,” Handong smirked.
“I thought about it,” Minji laughed. “I don’t think my security detail would’ve liked that very much.”
“Well, maybe she’ll be in the crowd tonight,” Handong mused.
“I hope so. I’ll honestly be looking,” Minji admitted. “She was also very pretty. Like, could have been an idol herself. Seriously, you’d have a field day if you got to style her.”
Handong barked out a laugh, and then lowered her voice enough to make sure only Minji could hear.
“Every day I’m more and more convinced you’re not straight.”
Minji blushed.
“What, just because every date I’ve ever been on with a man didn’t progress past the first date?” Minji snickered.
“And every time you see a pretty woman you forget how to function. I remember when you first met me you could barely speak. But I have that effect on most people,” Handong laughed. Minji scowled at her in the reflection of the mirror.
“Maybe I just haven’t found the right one yet. All the men I’ve been on dates with have been… boring, which is shocking considering they’ve all been other idols or actors,” Minji huffed.
“Maybe you should start looking outside of the celebrity pool,” Handong deliberated. “Maybe you should date the fan that drew that picture instead.”
“Dongie!” Minji scoffed. “I can’t… date a fan. Wouldn’t that be a faux pas?”
“Guess it depends on the fan,” Handong shrugged. “If you’re interested, why not at least explore that avenue? You never know~”
“Why date anybody at all?”
A voice came from behind them, and Minji turned in her chair to see Dami the rapper, aka one of her closest friends, Lee Yubin.
“Be like me. Accept the single life and find freedom in not having to depend on anyone else for happiness,” Yubin continued, plopping herself on the stylist chair next to them and spinning around.
“Yubin!” Minji grinned, not so much at what she was saying but for seeing her friend for the first time in two months. Handong was less impressed and let out a scoff.
“Not everyone has a lack of romanticism like you, Yubin. Some of us crave love and companionship like other people our age,” Handong tutted.
“Why open yourself up to being hurt? Doesn’t seem worth it. But, to each their own, I suppose,” Yubin sighed, hanging her legs off the arm of the chair. Minji frowned. She knew Yubin’s history better than Handong. Yubin had been hurt really bad by a past relationship, and had closed herself off ever since. She wanted to spare Yubin the argument, so she tried to change the subject for both their sakes.
“Did you miss me?” Minji questioned.
“Hell yeah I did. Hanging with Siyeon and Dongie is cool and all, but it’s not the same without you keeping up the energy,” Yubin claimed.
“This is her way of saying that she kept falling asleep early during our movie nights,” Handong chuckled.
“I didn’t mean to,” Yubin muttered, sitting up slightly. “You doing okay, Minji? You just got back.”
“Yeah, I’m good. One more show, then I can rest for a bit and just work with Siyeonie in the studio,” Minji stated. “It’s a shorter set, anyway. Don’t worry about me.”
“And I couldn’t help but notice none of the songs in your set are the ones I feature on, even though I’m in this show, too,” Yubin teased.
“Well I can’t use you to hype up my stages every time I perform in Seoul. People will start claiming I’m taking advantage of your fame,” Minji chuckled. She felt Handong pat her shoulders.
“Alright, you’re done,” Handong announced. Minji looked at herself in the mirror and sighed in satisfaction.
“Amazing job as always, Dongie. Thank you,” Minji smiled.
“Now give me a slit in my eyebrow,” Yubin grinned. Handong rolled her eyes.
“Haven’t you heard? Minji has reserved me. I’m only going to style her from now on,” Handong reveal. Yubin sat up quickly, looking distressed.
“What? You’re really depriving the rest of the industry of Dongie’s talent?” Yubin gaped. Now it was Minji’s turn to roll her eyes.
“Oh, it’s fine. We haven’t signed anything, yet. Get your cool eyebrow slit,” Minji urged, and she started to get up. Then she paused, feeling her back seize up, and she hissed in pain. “Ah! Ah…!”
“Are you okay?” Handong braced her hands against Minji, trying to support her. Yubin jumped up immediately and leapt over to Minji’s side.
“Your back acting up again?” Yubin inquired, looking worried.
“Just a little. It’s fine,” Minji winced, slowly straightening up. “See? No problem.”
“I’ll go get your pain pills. I assume they’re in your bag as usual,” Yubin offered, walking quickly over to Minji’s bag.
“Yeah, thank you,” Minji nodded, pressing against her back, trying to overcome the pain.
“Maybe you shouldn’t go on,” Handong sighed.
“No, this is fine. It’s normal. I can perform through it,” Minji assured.
“You know, most people don’t have back issues like this at age 26,” Yubin scolded, popping a pill into Minji’s hand and handing over her water tumbler. Minji quickly took it, swallowing the pill down with some water.
“I don’t know what’s wrong. I can’t think of any big injuries. Just, all of a sudden a year ago, it started bothering me,” Minji huffed, relaxing as she felt the pain fade, as it always did eventually, even without her pain pills.
“Might just be general wear and tear from performing pretty consistently for 9 years,” Yubin suggested.
“Yeah but, you debuted around the same time I did, and you have more intense choreography than I do, and your back doesn’t constantly betray you,” Minji argued.
“But Yubin is also far more relaxed than you are. You can get a little… tense,” Handong pointed out.
“Maybe you should get it looked at,” Yubin wondered, and Minji sighed.
“The company already hired someone once to look at my back. He got… a little more handsy than what I was comfortable with,” Minji sneered. “He wanted me to let him give me a ‘deep tissue massage’.”
“Gross,” Yubin scowled, which matched Handong’s.
“I’ve been a little nervous to get someone to look at me ever since,” Minji admitted.
“Well you shouldn’t just ignore it,” Handong stated.
“Dongie’s right. If it already hurts this much and then you do injure it? It won’t be good,” Yubin theorized.
“I know,” Minji relented. “Just wish I knew someone I could trust.”
“What kind of thing would you be looking for? Maybe we can research,” Yubin suggested.
“Well, not a creep, first of all,” Minji mused. “Dependable. Integrity.”
“Not something you can usually tell by a Google search,” Handong pondered. Minji thought for a moment.
“Around the time my back started hurting, a news story broke. It popped out at me because it involved a physiotherapist. Punched a patient’s abusive partner. I remember thinking, I’d trust someone like that to look at my back,” Minji revealed.
“Then why don’t we look up that person from the news story?” Yubin asked, but Minji shook her head.
“The news story hid their identity at their request because they weren’t interested in the spotlight,” Minji recalled.
“Or perhaps they were protecting their job. Something like that could alienate some of their clientele,” Handong pointed out.
“But if it’s true that they didn’t do it for recognition, there’s your integrity, right there,” Yubin stated.
“Doesn’t matter. I’ll never find out who they are, now,” Minji sighed. “Anyway, the pain has passed. I better go warm up for my set.”
“Okay but, after this we’re finding you a specialist. We’ll vet them ourselves. I’ll even ask Siyeon to get in on it. You know she has a discerning eye,” Yubin suggested.
“Alright, fair enough,” Minji relented.
“Great, now that that’s settled,” Yubin clapped her hands together, “Dongie? Eyebrow.”
“Yeah, yeah…” Handong muttered, grabbing a very tiny razor from her bag.
Minji left her two friends behind, trying to find a nice quiet wall to stand up against while doing her vocal exercises.
As she searched, she glanced at her phone again, and the picture she had taken of the fanart.
Back pain or no, she would put on a good show.
After all, what if Bora was watching?
Minji wouldn’t let her down.
Perks of working with a lot of athletes is that Bora got to meet a lot of incredible people, many of them famous in their own right.
Downside is she had to work later sometimes, since a lot of athletes trained early mornings, and that meant they usually only had evenings to have Bora work them through any lingering recovery or just a stiff muscle that acted up from time to time.
It meant that Bora had to miss out on some things, like JiU being back in Seoul and going to perform at a music show anniversary event. Not that she had been able to get a ticket (she had tried), but it meant she couldn’t watch the livestream either, or see the fancams as they came out.
Ever since Bora’s interaction with JiU, her admiration had grown even deeper. Even though the interaction didn’t feel real. She remembered it all, but it felt like it had happened to someone else. A true out-of-body-experience. If not for the signed photo on her wall in her bedroom, she would doubt that it happened to her at all.
Not that it changed Bora’s behaviour in any way. She was still just a fan, and she would cheer for JiU's success from afar. But she had to admit, every time she felt a bit down, she would think about JiU telling her she was rooting for her, and she’d feel a bit more of a bounce in her step. It’d be an interaction she would treasure always.
And she might’ve been saving up for the next meet and greet.
But now she was done with her last patient for the evening, and she was looking forward to getting home, curling up with her laptop, and watching the recording of JiU’s performance.
She should probably see if Yoohyeon was done with her last patient, too, and then they could head home together. Much like Bora, Yoohyeon also tried to be accommodating with her time for people who needed it, and Bora knew Yoohyeon had a couple of sessions this evening as well.
Bora started to head to where Yoohyeon’s office was, just to check, but she didn’t get very far, as Yoohyeon nearly collided with her after rounding a corner, and she looked breathless and wide-eyed.
“Bora!” Yoohyeon gasped. “Have you seen the news?!”
“What? No. Why?” Bora questioned. Yoohyeon took a deep breath.
“At the variety concert event. The one JiU was performing at. The stage collapsed,” Yoohyeon revealed, “during her set.”
Bora’s eyes widened, and she felt like her heart stopped for a moment.
“What?” Bora gawked. “Is everyone okay? Is she okay?”
“I don’t know! I only know anything at all because I was walking by emergency and everyone was in a frenzy,” Yoohyeon explained. “They brought anyone who was injured here, Bora!”
Bora’s eyes glazed over.
“I need to go see,” Bora stated, pushing past Yoohyeon.
“Wait!” Yoohyeon called after her. “You can’t go, Bora! Ugh… just don’t get in anyone’s way!”
Yoohyeon’s words echoed in Bora’s mind as she headed toward the emergency ward. The ward was on the other side of the hospital from outpatient care, but Bora’s feet were taking her so swiftly, she was there before she knew it.
Emergency was indeed in a tizzy. Lots of people running around. Bora didn’t even know where to start. Where should she look? How would she know where to find JiU? Was she even there? What if it was serious? Would she have already been moved to critical care? Then Bora would never be able to see her.
But she did have clearance for the ward of emergency, at the very least. She used her badge, not really thinking, to enter through the large doors, remembering not to get in anyone’s way, as Yoohyeon had warned.
Some people gave her a questioning look, but they saw her badge and saw she worked at the hospital, so they paid her no mind after that.
There seemed to be a lot of patients in the ward. There always was. Accidents were pretty frequent in a city this large. It was never a dull place. But Bora couldn’t tell who was from the concert and who was from a car accident.
None of them were JiU.
But then, at the far end.
A large cluster of doctors. Doctors she knew were from different wards, too. Bora knew enough that they only called in that much extra support if there was severe, life-threatening trauma, or it was an important person.
Bora hoped it wasn’t both.
She approached the crowd, comprised of nurses and doctors, some running to-and-fro at others’ requests, but Bora was relieved to see the atmosphere seemed kind of relaxed, with most of the doctors checking charts, chatting to each other, or chatting whoever was on the gurney.
Finally getting close enough to peer past some shoulders, Bora saw who it was.
It was JiU.
She had an oxygen mask on, but she was sitting up, nodding at a doctor as he spoke to her, and she said some words back. Even while being in the hospital she seemed like she was being friendly and patient.
Then JiU’s gaze shifted past the crowd.
Their eyes met, just for a second.
Reality hit Bora, hard, and she ripped herself away, rushing away from the scene as fast as she could.
Who was she? A sasaeng?! She wasn’t the type to ever go encroach in on an idol’s personal space. How would JiU feel, being laid up in the hospital after a probably harrowing experience, maybe in pain and not in control of her environment, and seeing a fan peek in at her?
Bora was disappointed in herself.
But part of her was also glad she could confirm for herself that JiU was okay. She seemed lucid and responsive. She was going to be alright. Bora just had to leave her in the capable hands of the doctors.
The rest was not anywhere near being Bora’s business.
She was, after all, just a fan.
It had been a week since the stage collapsed. JiU’s company as well as the event’s host put out a joint statement. There had only been minor injuries among fans near the stage, some stage crew, back up dancers, and JiU herself. Apparently JiU was recovering from a back injury, but the company assured she would make a full recovery.
It was a relief to Bora. At first, when she saw it was a back injury, she had been really worried. Back injuries were no joke. But if it was minor, and she was expected to make a full recovery, then Bora could relax, and the whole incident could be put behind them as a bad dream.
Though she hoped JiU hadn’t recognized her in the emergency ward, or even registered that she was there. She still felt embarrassed about that.
Other than that, it was business as usual. And that meant treating Gahyun again for another strained muscle.
“Ow.”
Bora let out a sigh.
“Exercises, Gah,” Bora muttered.
“How are exercises going to help when I’m women’s baseball’s greatest and only hope?” Gahyun whined. Bora rolled her eyes.
“I’m sorry I put that in your head,” Bora huffed. “Though I think I just managed to give you more of an ego.”
“One day I will overcome all my muscle pains, as that’s what a true hero would do,” Gahyun proclaimed, and then eyed Bora suspiciously. “Speaking of injuries, how’s your wife?”
Bora shook her head, and pushed on Gahyun’s leg a little more firmer than she needed to.
“I assume my quote unquote wife is fine. But I wouldn’t know. There hasn’t been more news,” Bora explained as Gahyun hissed and pouted.
“Alright, I’m just teasing, don’t break my leg,” Gahyun muttered. “I still can’t believe she was at this hospital. Any idea what gurney she was on? Maybe there’s a piece of hair we can grab off it. Sell it on the internet.”
“How am I the fan and you’re the one being creepy?” Bora scoffed.
“I’m just saying. Big picture,” Gahyun shrugged. Bora shook her head incredulously.
“All that matters to me is that she’s okay,” Bora stated.
“Of course it does. Because you’re in love~” Gahyun teased.
“Stop it. I don’t know her like that,” Bora scowled. “You’re lucky I’m done with your stretches. I was about to turn you into a pretzel.”
Bora stepped away, and Gahyun shifted like she usually did, testing Bora’s work.
“Excellent work as always, doc. Even if you were being a little more aggressive than usual,” Gahyun grumbled. “Wanna go grab food?”
“No can do. I have another patient,” Bora announced.
“What? But I’m always your last patient of the day,” Gahyun whined.
“Hospital assigned me a new one, starting today. Very last minute, actually. I haven’t had a chance to check their file, so I’m not sure what I’m dealing with,” Bora admitted.
“Ugh, fine. Put your job ahead of me. I see how it is,” Gahyun pouted. Bora scrunched her nose and rustled the hair on top of Gahyun’s head.
“Yoohyeon should be off work by now, if you’re so lonely,” Bora suggested.
“Alright, but we’re going to have so much fun without you,” Gahyun claimed.
“I feel the FOMO already,” Bora grinned. “Remember to sign out.”
“I will, I will,” Gahyun sighed, waving behind her as she stepped out around the curtain.
Bora shook her head and chuckled, amused by her friend, and reached for the file she had been keeping to the side. It had been a while since she got a new patient. Since a lot of her patients were high profile, the hospital had become more discerning with who she would take on.
Bora flipped open the file and read the name at the top.
Kim Minji
Bora paused for a moment.
She was aware that was JiU’s real name.
She shook off the thought. Kim Minji was a very common name. She went to school with three Kim Minjis. None of them were JiU. So it was probably a coincidence.
Then she read the medical reason for seeing Bora.
Lumbar and Trapezius Strain
So, a back injury.
Huh.
Again, probably a coincidence. Bora hadn’t seen anything that suggested JiU needed outpatient care.
The last thing Bora needed was to get herself worked up over nothing. So she checked the time and saw that Gahyun had distracted her longer than she thought. The patient might be waiting by now. She’d have to read the rest of the file later, and do a hands-on assessment.
Bora went to the front desk and the waiting room. She wasn’t the only physiotherapist there, so there were other patients, so she had to call out to see which one was hers when she poked her head in.
“Kim Minji?”
A woman with a very baggy, beige jacket looked up. Bora could only see the woman’s eyes between the face mask and a large ballcap, and she saw those eyes widen as they looked upon her, almost in recognition. Bora brushed it off.
“Sorry for the wait, follow me,” Bora urged, and the woman slowly got up, and Bora could tell with how she moved that she was definitely limited in her movement from some back pain.
The woman followed silently behind Bora, to the point where she kept having to check behind her to see if she was still following. Then she brought the woman to her little corner with the treatment table behind some thin, blue curtains, and she closed them around the both of them. Bora opened the file again, looking over it quickly.
“So, back injury, huh? I know that can be scary. But there’s many ways we can overcome it, and I’ll do my very best to ensure that you regain your full range of movement with no long-lasting complications. I’m very familiar with helping the body’s natural sequences to heal itself reach the height of its potential, though my methods might seem odd, at times. I hope I can earn your trust so we can work towards getting better together,” Bora rambled off, not noticing any specifics about the injury itself in her file.
Finally, the woman spoke.
“I’m sorry, but… aren’t you… Bora?”
Bora looked up from the file, surprised by the muffled question from the woman. Bora looked down at her badge, which had her full government name, and then she looked back up.
“Why, yes. Yes I am,” Bora smiled politely.
For a moment, the woman’s eyes themselves seemed to smile back, and then she pulled her mask down.
Bora felt her breath catch.
It was the first time she had ever seen her without makeup, but even still, it was unmistakable.
“The world really can be quite small, can’t it?”
The woman laughed after saying so, a laugh as beautiful as a song.
JiU was standing in front of Bora, beaming.
“I guess… you’ll be my physiotherapist from now on?”