Archive of Our Own

“So, you remain here.”

Chara knew they had been there the whole time but never truly gave them too much thought. Just another passenger sharing the same body, and a bothersome one at that. It had been hard to shut them up. 

Case was, Chara had never concerned themselves with them to even recall what they looked like. But after being asleep for so long, it wasn’t hard to latch onto the nearest thing. Chara could recognize their soul, as muted as it was. 

“All that talk and by the end of the day you allowed us to proceed without consequence.”

The yellow soul did not seem to react. But Chara knew better. They were a predator onto its last final prey. 

“You could have simply assumed control; we both know that. Did you enjoy playing the righteous vigilante back there?” 

They raised their head, finally responding to Chara’s taunts. Yellow met red.

For all the negative feelings, protests and downright tantrums they had thrown along their journey, now their gaze felt empty. 

“Where has all your rage gone to? Not going to say anything about it?”

They were fast, but Chara was faster. 

By the time they had drawn their gun, Chara was already on them. They both rolled around in this world’s nothingness, with no end or beginning to the naked eye. No up and down. They were falling. They were ascending. 

A gunshot. 

Too bad Chara was already dead. Both of them were. 

When Chara managed to pin them down, at last they could make their assessment. What had callen for the yellow soul to fight back? After waiting so long? They seemed to at least have the right instincts for it, so why…?

Yellow eyes. 

“You are not them.” 

Later, Chara would curse themselves. Their fury so profound, their pride so wounded, their ego attacked. Once they would wake back again in that golden flower’s bed they would trash so violently in the kid’s head there would be no need to coerce anybody, pure raw control. It would be so fast, so swiftly, the other ghost in the body would almost have no chance to react. To cry. To beg. 

But now, in that small moment they got taken aback, a familiar blink called their souls. The red and yellow hearts flashed in the small space between their bodies. 

Before Chara could react, the yellow soul had shot again.

◇ ◇ ◇

The second time around, Chara did not hesitate. 

This other yellow soul didn’t, either. 

Between a gun and a knife, it was not going to last long. 

◇ ◇ ◇

The third time, Chara gauged their odds and took a chance. 

“What is it that you want? I suppose you’re not merely a rabid dog hidden here, at the end of the world. You’re not much of a challenge.”

The yellow soul looked them up and down, aiming for their chest right where their soul rested. 

“And yet, you ain’t managed to beat me.”

Chara’s hand twitched for their knife, but they promised themselves to remain calm. They crossed their arm to keep themselves in check. They waited. 

After a few silences, the yellow soul bit. 

“How do I get outta here?”

Chara’s smile deepened. Okay, they could work with that. 

“I cannot say, myself. Maybe if you let me help you exit the way you have kindly done so to me we could see if it works for you too.”

“Don’tcha get tired of talking like that?”

“Like what?”

“Like you’re trying to show off you read an encyclopedia or somethin’” 

Chara bit back a nasty return. Deep breaths. 

“Pray tell, how did you end up here? You are not the same ghost that has been following me. Who are you?”

“Why do you care?”

“It’s only courteous to ask for-”

When Chara came back to the kid’s body, all the way back to that egregious flowerbed, they gritted their teeth so hard they could hear them creak. 

At least the skeleton was a quick affair, a few seconds back to try again. It did not mean to go back to the very beginning. This was starting to get annoying. And personal. 

◇ ◇ ◇

Chara raised their hands coming in. 

“Your name is Clover, right?” 

It had been so easy to make them trust them. Some small talk here and there, take some information, shut them up for the rest of the ride. 

The Clover that shared the kid’s body was weak. Too naive. Too keen. Too eager. At least it was some sort of development from the mute and disinterested kid, although Chara could not put up with them for too long before getting a headache. Although it had been a little bit funny the betrayed sounds they made when everything went down. 

Clover kept their aim on them. 

“Do not pretend to ignore me, it will not help you in the long run and I can help you.”

They tilted their head. “How do you know my name?”

Chara rolled their eyes and spat. “You hardly listen to me, why should I explain myself to you?”

Clover’s finger hovered over the trigger, Chara cursed to their insides. 

“Let’s start anew, shall we? Take this as my gesture of goodwill” They offered their hand. “I’m Chara.” 

“Sure, pal.”

They didn’t even glance at the extended hand. 

Chara physically felt their rage burning in their stomach. 

The world blinked. Chara dodged the first shot and reached for their knife. 

◇ ◇ ◇

The thing is, when you have so much time with yourself, you get to think a lot. 

Chara is not alone, not really. They have the kid, somewhere dormant inside their mind, the weak Clover when they dare to speak up, and that lying filthy flower. You could even make a point with the skeleton. 

But they’re boring . 

The weak Clover does not remember, so there’s nothing to do there. The skeleton has some insight and can make good guesses on his own script… Still a script though. They’re not much different than all the pawns in this place. 

The kid and the flower remember, however. Not everything, not the very end, but still. 

Sometimes the kid will think something that will make Chara stop for a few seconds, just for the mere novelty of it, for as the kid sometimes feels nothing less of a vessel, no mind to think and no voice to speak. These chances are few in between, and don’t go much further than a small sign they’re still there. All in all, another passive actor. 

The lying flower is a whole other issue but, as much as it angers Chara, he’s harmless enough. He had been entertaining the very first time when they killed him, very few monsters lasted long enough to beg and cry. But after some rounds it was downright irritating. Same with the skeleton, Chara could almost do the deed without breaking a sweat, it was muscle memory by now. 

They were all delays for this new real challenge. 

So. Lots of alone time. What to do about it? 

Strategize.

◇ ◇ ◇

Chara dodged the first shot, again .

“The weak you, it's rather bothersome, but at least they possess some personality.” 

Dodge.  

“You, on the other hand, barely speak and resort all the time to violence.” 

Dodge. 

“A gun at that, no class at all. Care to share with the class why the moody mood?”

Fourth and fifth shot, all coming back to back. They seemed a little too trigger-happy today. Did they have infinite ammo? 

“Guns are cool,” was their final reply. 

Chara rolled their eyes so hard they almost hurt. Of course they would focus on that. 

“It’s so impersonal, getting the job done and that’s it. There’s no emotion behind it.” 

Clover lowered their gun. Not too much, but it was a start. 

Their expression hardened, nothing too drastic, but enough so Chara could catch it. Something they had said had done something. Chara waited. They could be patient, lay the perfect trap and get their well deserved prey so this will all be forever, once and for all. 

They would play the long game and they would win. 

At last, Clover spoke up: “What should I use my gun for, then?”

Chara snorted.  “To inflict pain, duh.”

“I ain’t lookin'to hurt folks without a good reason, though.”

Chara raised a brow. “You’ve shot me, several times.”

“You’ve tried to stab me. It’s self defense.” Clover tilted his head. “If you’re takin’ it personal, that ain’t my problem.” 

Oh, Chara took it personal. In fact, they were taking it so personal they were now braiding a beautiful mattress with all the grudges they were holding from this cheap cowboy wannabe to strangle them with. It was going to be so sweet when they finally got their hands around their neck they weren’t even going to swiftly end it, no, oh no, they were going to make it count . They were going to make it last, make sure this disgusting human would never…

Sixth shot. Chara didn’t get to dodge. 

◇ ◇ ◇

◇ ◇ ◇

◇ ◇ ◇

Chara came down with a revenge.

“What was THAT for?”

Clover, for once in full defence mode, dodged. Chara chased them like a bull, their grip on their knife so tight it trembled. 

For a glimpse there, Clover could swear their red eyes flashed like a demon of the old stories would. 

Any chance they could, Chara tried to slash them, not aiming at anything in particular but to hurt them. It was frantic and almost random, but Clover had faced unfairer windows and angrier foes before. They would be okay.

There was something to say about angering the only person they had seen in a long while, so long seconds became hours and years seconds and there was no point to count from one to two and zero to infinite because nothing really mattered. There was nothing left but the expansive void here. 

Still, Clover would call it a victory, for they had gotten what they truly were looking for. 

Now, this whole “I come in peace” thing had been, if nothing, hilarious after trying to kill each other the first time. Clover was not going to fall for any of that any time soon. So they were stuck. Fighting was making them go in circles, but talking would end them right where Chara wanted them to. What was left to do?

Angering them enough to break the façade, Clover reasoned. 

Chara stepped back, maybe finally cooling down enough to try anything else that wasn’t blindly throwing their knife around. 

Clover took their chance and shot their foot. And then their leg, for good measure. 

Chara screamed in pain, falling into their injured leg and letting out such a wounded sound it startled something inside Clover. They were taken aback and approached Chara to check on them. They were sure neither of them could feel any physical pain outside of their souls, so why…?

They did not see Chara’s smile quickly enough. 

When Chara threw themselves at them, not much different from the very first time, both of their weapons went flying as they went down. This time it was an anything goes sort of thing, both of them reaching anything they could hold onto to their advantage. Clover pulled Chara’s hair as they bit down on their arm, then Chara kicked their guts as Clover punched them in their neck just for Chara to headbutt straight to Clover’s face.

They didn’t really feel anything of that, they were ghosts, but it was the principle of the matter.

Now, not to be mean, but Clover was stronger, and taller, and cooler, so it took almost no time for them to pin Chara back. Their chest tightly going up and down as if they had run a marathon to get here. Maybe they had done so. Clover still didn’t know where did they exactly go every time they killed them.

“Why did you do that” Chara gritted out. “Why did you shoot me. I didn’t even do anything. ”

The image had been so clear, back then and now. It had been an easy decision, for they knew it was the chance they had been waiting for. 

“You were makin’ a scary face.”

“Huh???”  

Chara’s face was… a whole picture of its own. The emotions ranged from shocked to confused to angered to flattered. Clover, being completely honest, was not going to unpack all that from someone they had just heard said they inflicted pain for fun. Still, it was amusing to see them for once not be all fakey-smiley and go completely nuclear. 

Clover couldn’t hide a small chuckle. Chara went ballistic.

“What are you laughing about? What’s so funny?” They trashed under Clover’s heavy constraint. “Let me go!”

“Nah, so you can try stabbin’ me again? Don’t think so.” 

“What do you want then? What is it?” Chara quieted down as they went on. “ You can’t kill me, you don’t want to talk, you won’t let me finish this once and for all… What. What do you seek?”

What did Clover want, indeed. 

Answers, first of all, even better if they did not come from an axe pending above him. A chance because they, too, had an unfinished mission they could not forget about. And, if we were being honest… 

Suddenly, Chara started to laugh.

“You’re so pathetic.” 

Their smile grew longer. And longer. Clover recognized the same expression from before. 

“A mindless attack dog, guarding what?”

From their eyes grew a dark, smushy liquid. Well, that was new and actually disgusting, Clover thought, did they do it on command?

“You know there won’t be a good ending for you right? Your weak self does not even have the ability to remember, I doubt you do either,” Chara leaned towards Clover, bringing their faces closer, “I will come back again, and again, and again; until I get rid of you.”

The both of them kept still. 

Clover took a gamble. They weakened their grip.  

“I would love to see you give it a try, for real.” Clover closed in even more. “You’re sorta rude, but I reckon we could get along just fine. Whatcha think, mate?” 

To that, Chara got away from them and reached for the gun. However, before Clover could try anything, Chara shot themselves. 

Clover was stunned beyond words. 

As they said, rude. 

◇ ◇ ◇

When Chara woke up, they were mostly angry at themselves for not getting at least the last word in. 

◇ ◇ ◇

“Okay, I don’t get it. I cannot understand you” They admitted right after the world faded again to its end. Clover was waiting for them, gun by their side, surprised by the sudden entrance. It had taken them longer than normal to come back . “You want to be friends or whatever, but you didn’t even reply to me most of the time when I was being nice.”

Clover crossed their arms.

“You’re a pretty bad liar, has anybody ever told you so?”

Chara's sweet everpresent smile deepened. “You thought you hurt my leg for real back there.”  

“Yeah, that’s called puttin’ on a good show. But that whole “I wanna be friends” routine? You’re awful at it.”

“I was being kind to you!”

“Right after we tried to kill each other, yeah?” 

Clover sat down and reached for their gun, but did not aim it. Rather, they just let it rest in their lap. Not completely gone out of view but not threatening either. Chara complained but sat down as well, resting their head in one of their hands as they took their knife out and let it rest by their side. They kept a good distance from each other. 

“Whatever. You are in my way, you somehow changed your opinion on me and want us to be the best of friends. What do you propose we do next?”

Clover gave it some thought, and finally said “I think we should get to know each other.”

Chara physically cringed. 

Clover burst out laughing. 

The sound was weird, to say the least. Because from what little had gathered from both the weak Clover and this one, it fitted them. They were supposed to be this sunshine-ish golden-ish good vibe-ish kid, but this Clover was more cautious, had been roughed up in some way or another, and it felt like it had been a long time since the last time they got to laugh like that. 

Once Clover had quieted down, Chara tapped their wrist, as if they had better things to do with their time. 

“Alright, joke’s over. Not to be rude, but the truth is, I don’t really care that much about ya.” Okay, Chara could take that. “Where are we?” 

“The end of the world”

“Real funny.” 

Chara rolled their eyes. They seemed to do that a lot in Clover’s company.

“I am not joking. This is the very last phase before the end of the world.” 

“Huh.” Clover looked around. The void and complete silence stared back “You know what? I ain’t even gonna bother arguin’ with that.”

“How long have you been here?”

“Dunno, lotsa time I’d say. Didn’t really want to think too hard about it after awhile” Clover dodged the question and, before Chara could start digging any further, they continued. “Wait a sec, you said this is the last phase?” 

“Exactly.”

“So what’s stopping it from, you know, ending itself?”

“You.”

Clover furrowed their eyes. 

“That doesn’t even make any sense, I ain’t even doing anything to stop anything .”

Chara sighed. 

“The first time I came here I expected someone, something else. A powerful being that could help me finish what I started. I could feel their presence in my journey. I believe they’re waiting for you to be gone.”

“If there’s any powerful being here I haven’t felt them at all.”

“Figures. Me neither.” 

They lapsed onto a brief silence. 

“What journey were you talking about? Where do you come from?”

“The Underground.”

“Oh, so they’re still alive?”

In the end of the world there is no such thing as cold and hot. It just is. There are no words to describe what doesn't exist and cannot be comprehended by the human mind. The state of perpetual existence. 

And yet, Chara suddenly felt freezing from the inside out. Something had shifted, they just didn’t know what yet.

“The monsters? Of course they are. Were.”

Clover made a weird face, they seemed to taste something sour.

“I thought I managed to get rid of most of them. Seems I missed more than I thought.”

◇ ◇ ◇

The story goes like this: 

There was once a child with a mission. 

◇ ◇ ◇

“What do you mean “rid of most of them”? Who did you miss?” 

“Ain’t we talking about the monsters in the Underground?”

Something sat heavy and cold inside Chara’s stomach as they, for the first time, realized Clover’s clothes had a heavy dust layer over them. Their heart spiked up. 

“Yes, I am. What did you do exactly when you came down here?” 

“I killed them all.” 

◇ ◇ ◇

The child was a self-called hero, who would bring light onto the mysterious disappearances of five kids who had climbed a mountain to never been seen again. Thus, they climbed the mountain as well. 

However, they would soon figure out something much worse had happened to them. 

◇ ◇ ◇

Well, that was nice while it lasted . Thought Clover, dodging Chara’s attack as they readied their gun.

◇ ◇ ◇

Soon, their mission turned into a vengeance. The child would now bring justice to the fallen children and onto the abominable monsters who had taken their lives. They would find their souls and let them leave this godforsaken place, to find their families and let them rest in peace.

The child knew it was not going to be easy, but lucky for them, they had a companion. Another hideous monster, but one that promised protection and immunity. The child didn’t know exactly how, but they would not look a gift horse in the mouth. Nevertheless, they would figure it out later.

◇ ◇ ◇

Chara knew they were being an A-grade hypocrite right now. Raging over what? The exact same thing they had just done over and over again? 

It was different, they repeated to themselves. They had the right, they knew the monsters, nobody else but them could harm them, because only them could understand, really understand, what it entailed. 

And what if they rejoiced in the pain? On the feeling of being invisible? To be in control for once? Those were their own feelings, but it did not tarnish their final, true purpose. The means to an end would be the same nevertheless. 

But of course, of course this was another scum, asshole, disgusting human. A foreigner to this place, who thought they could do whatever they wanted to this place. They had killed monsters. They had dusted their hands. They did not seem regretful about it. 

◇ ◇ ◇

Right before their vengeance was over, the betraying monster appeared and revealed its true colors. 

But the child had grown stronger. More willing to hurt others. More determined to complete their mission. And the monster had grown weaker and fearful by their side. So the child took what the monster had promised to them. 

◇ ◇ ◇

Chara grabbed the end of the gun. Clover grabbed the edge of the knife. They reached a stalemate. 

“Did you know? The other you talks all the time about justice and fairness. I bet you’re the same.” They trembled together, “but I do not see any scenario where killing monsters in the Underground is justified.”

“Why do you care?”

Chara pressed on. 

“Why do you think you can judge me? What do you know about me?” 

“No, I do not know much about you. But I know this.” Chara put more force into their knife, cutting deep into Clover’s hand. It did not bleed: “I know you’re naive, that you feel lonely and that you’re a crybaby. And that sooner or later you will go insane in this place.”

I know how you trust so easily. I know how much you want another friend. I know how stubborn you can be. I know how you quickly latch onto others. I know how you cried when you figured out we were never friends. I know how betrayal sounds to you when you learn the sort of monster I really am. I know how you rage. I know how deeply you seem to care about others. 

“You don’t seem to understand you are a leftover idea from another time. You didn’t matter back then and you don’t matter now.” 

Chara paused, coming to a realization, and then pressed on. 

“Do tell, what will you do if I never come back?” 

A flash of real and profound despair crossed Clover’s face, but Chara caught on to it.

“Keep staring into the void for eternity? Talk to yourself? Make up another companion? How do you even know if I am real?” 

Clover gulped. Chara lowered their knife and let go of the gun, but Clover didn’t. 

“Come on, Clover. Try killing me again. Do you not want to find out?” 

Chara grabbed the gun’s barrel and pointed it to their head. It shuddered. 

“Maybe this time I’ll get a dirty secret out of the other you, see how that works out in the long run while you wait and wait for me.” 

◇ ◇ ◇

But the monster was more desperate and, for just the smallest amount of time, as much determined them. 

When the monster tried to run away in time, the child landed the last blow, and so the world fell apart.

◇ ◇ ◇

Clover shot.

◇ ◇ ◇

When Chara woke up again, they laughed until they cried. 

This was starting to get interesting! 

◇ ◇ ◇

◇ ◇ ◇

◇ ◇ ◇

“You did not think I’d come back, did you?”

Clover tried to hide it but Chara could see it bright as day. They were relieved. 

They had made good of their promise. For once, they had not only bought time but actually stalled. It had been bothersome when they had to pretend they could not hear the weaker Clover try to talk to them, and even the kid had popped up to ask what was going on. But it had all been worth it just to see that slim moment of weakness in this Clover. 

Being real, it had not been that much longer. Maybe barely scraping double the time it took them to reach them at normal speed. But Chara took a chance it’d feel much, much longer for them. And it seemed they were right. 

“I had a rather lucrative time out there. Had lots of conversations–”

“Why do you care so much about the monsters? Why do you keep talking about ‘another’ me? Why–” 

Clover went silent as Chara lifted the sleeve of their sweater and raised their knife to their wrist.

“Keep trying me and I will take out my own soul to kill myself. Then you will learn what true patience is.” 

Clover did not respond, which Chara took as approval. 

“As I was saying. I had some conversations back there.” Not really, Chara would rather die than to try to speak to the weaker Clover for more than an hour again. ”And yes, in my journey there’s ‘another’ you, and if that’s your real personality I’m grateful whatever little trauma you got going on fixed you. They accompany me and–” 

“I’m glad we are past the fake niceties. The real you is much more fun.”

To that, Chara frowned and cut deep into their wrist. Their soul came out. They immediately slashed it. 

◇ ◇ ◇

“Guess you can’t handle nothin’, huh?”

Chara did not like that tone. And they did not like either they seemed amused .

“What’s got your face all twisted up?”

They had taken an even longer route to make good of their threat! 

“You seem wired.”

“What? Alone time it’s also good time to think, you know!” Clover stretched their arms and scrunched their face, a whole show in front of Chara. “So I’ve been thinkin’...”

“That’s news for me.”

“I’ve been thinkin’…” Clover repeated themselves, touching their cheek with a finger. “That you will always come back, you’ve said it yourself.”

Chara raised an eyebrow.

“I do not care that much about you.”

“Nah, this ain’t about me, fer sure” Clover smiled and Chara wanted to rip. it. off. “You got too much of an ego going on, you gotta finish this whole end-of-the-world-thing one way or another. Then you gotta come here and try kill me.”

Clover approached them. Chara noticed their gun was missing. They also noticed a headache incoming.

They readied their knife. 

“And you would rather die than back down.” 

Clover… closed their hands on theirs. They were holding them. 

“‘Cause that’d mean you lost. To me.” 

Chara was going to kill them.

“I’m going to kill you.” 

“Promise me?”

Chara smiled back. 

◇ ◇ ◇

So, what now? 

Nothing, because the original plan was still on. 

◇ ◇ ◇

Clover let Chara go.

“I reckon if we could stop killing each other for a short while we could find some sort common ground.”

“Because that worked wonder for the both of us.”

“Nay, don’t throw me into that bag. You are the one with anger issues.”

“You are the one with a trigger happy fever.”

“It was self-defense!”

“You attacked me first.”

“And you kept going and then lied like a rug.”

Chara sighed, they were going in circles back to what, three timelines ago? 

“Alright, whatever. Yes, I attacked you. Yes, you attacked me. Can we move on?” 

Clover shrugged and sat down, not much different than their first go at this. Chara followed them suit. They faced each other. 

“Can I please ask you some questions without getting jumped?” 

“I don’t know. Can you?”

Clover good humour went away, Chara chuckled.

Clover groaned. “Okay, smartass, may we please get somewhere?” 

“Yes, but hold on,” Chara leaned in “I want to hear you first. How exactly did you end up here?”

◇ ◇ ◇

“And then I killed it. And I woke up here” 

Well, that was something. 

Chara stood up, deep in thought, and began to walk around. 

Clover didn’t seem to know about the ability to SAVE/RESET, but it was clear the flower had been providing his powers for their journey until he realised Clover was too much of a threat. But if the flower had the control over the timeline, how could this Clover be here after he died and not back to the start of his save? 

Chara couldn’t really SAVE, that was the kid. But they were sure the kid had as much of an idea on how it worked as they did. The skeleton did seem to be aware of something but Chara did not think they could get any information out of them. 

The flower had said he had lost his powers when the kid fell down, but wasn’t really surprised about it…

Ugh.

“I believe I will have to go back” Chara said, stopping both their train of thought and strolling. “The flower you talk about, he is still alive. And you are dead. He must have some knowledge we are lacking.” 

If he could stop lying about being his brother for awhile that would also be fortunate. 

“Wait, you can’t leave” yet” Clover stood up “You still ain’t done your part yet.”

Chara scrunched their face. “We have more pressing matters to worry about.”

“We got all the time in the world.” 

It was quite tempting to simply take their knife out and get out. Just for a quick laugh. 

“Alright. I will not tell you anything myself, though. Ask away, and you better make it quick.”

“What do you mean there’s another me?”

“Your ghost, you are dead in my time. This is old news, keep up.”

“How can you even see ‘em?”

“I am a ghost too, goodness. If you’re keep asking dumb questions-”

“When did you die?” 

“A long time ago.”

“How’d you come here?”

“Same as you.” Killed everyone. “Killed the flower. Ended up here. That is why I need to talk to him. ” 

“Huh.” Clover breathed out. “Makes sense.”

“Then I will get going.” 

“Wait!” Clover catched Chara’s wrist “Wait, geez. You are so testy.”

Testy was what they were about to get if Clover didn’t stop touching them out of nowhere. 

 “I meant, how did you fall to the Underground?”

Chara pulled a face. “That is personal, I did not ask for your motives either.”

“I jumped down.”

“What?” 

Chara stared at Clover, waiting for any sort of giveaway they were fooling. They were not. 

Clover shrugged “Ain’t much mystery to it. I… It was a mission.”

“A mission to what? Kill yourself?”

“To find the missing children.” 

Chara didn’t think Clover was aware they started to squeeze even harder, a slightly tremor poking through their voice. Chara felt, out of nowhere, they were about to slip through their fingers. 

“So, I’m not much different than you, got myself an uncomplete mission too.” They grew quiet, squinting their eyes. But their tone stayed firm.

“But you want to go back. For them.”

“I do.”

Chara tasted bile. 

“They’re not worth of it. Of your mission.”  Shadows passed before their eyes. “They’re humans.”

“And what about it?”

“Humans are cruel creatures.”

They will hurt you. Trample over you. Try to shape you onto what they desire. And if you refuse they will make sure you regret it. 

“They were kids, and the monsters killed them.” Clover made an attempt to reach their gun, but let their hand fall in the rim of their jeans, twisting the end of it. ”How could they do that?” 

“How could humans do that to monsters?” Chara’s voice raised up. “They were the ones who trapped them here, with no way out.”

“They probably deserved it!”

“Probably? You? Justice incarnated talking about likelihoods?” Chara pointed an accusing finger to their chest. “If humans hadn’t trapped them underground with an unfair spell, they would had never resorted to this.”

Clover grabbed their fingers and threw it away. 

“Why do you care so much ‘bout the monsters? Haven’t you seen them!?”

“I HAVE!” 

The scream Chara let out took them both out of guard, but it did not stop them to keep going. 

“I have. And you know what, Clover?” They began to giggle between each word. “Guess what? I was one of the missing kids. And if any of those kids was like me, they probably got what they deserved.” 

It quickly grew into a laughter. Clover backed off. 

“I did not fall down! I jumped too, just as you.” It turned into a cackle. “Humans made me do it. And monsters treated so much better than any human ever did. Humans are the worst thing that could had happened to monsters. I along them”

By the end of their tirade, Chara was doubling over, choking on their lack of air. When they tried to see Clover, their tears obscured the view. They hoped they were scaring them. 

“I also killed them all to get here. But at least I can face it instead of hiding behind a sorry excuse like you.”

To that, Chara decided, it was worth to right out stab themselves in their chest. Make it quicker this time.  

◇ ◇ ◇

“You’re a hypocrite,” was the greeting Chara got when they finally came back. 

It had been so long since Chara had seen them it took them a few seconds to recover. The shadow of their hurt pride surfacing once again, although Chara had tried more than once to shove it down. It was starting to get downright embarrassing how much they lost their composure around Clover.

“That I am.”

“I also don’t understand you. At all.” 

“You don’t need to.” 

“You’re weird” They settled on.

Lots of voices called at once. 

Weird. Strange. Bizarre. Of course Clover would be like one of them. 

Odd. Uncanny. Creepy. What did they even think? They had tried to kill each other. 

Evil. Bastard. Savage. Chara was only getting what they deserved. 

Freak. Beast. Demon.

“I’m sorry.”

The voices quieted. Chara stared. 

“I do not understand.”

“I wish we had met sooner,” Chara wished for many things, as well, but they were never this foolish  “before neither of us climbed this mountain. I want to believe we mighta got along just fine. Pals, even.”

The words twisted something inside Chara. A daydream of another reality. They immediately trampled it.

“You would had hated me as much as you hate me right now.”

“I actually don’t hate you. I think I’ve come to like you a lot.”

They were lying, they must be lying. Nobody liked Chara, ever. 

And if they did, nothing good would come out of it. Look at their brother. Their mother. Their father. All suffered by their hands. To be near them would only end up in tragedy. There must be an actual reason. 

“That’s because I’m the only person you’ve seen since who knows how long.”

“Nah, not really. You’re fun to hang out with. Wouldn’t say that about a stuck-up boring person. You’re a stuck-up interesting person, tho.”

It must be a lie. 

“Do you hate me, Chara?” 

◇ ◇ ◇ 

“Why did you kill them?” They asked back. 

The air grew bitter. 

Clover knew Chara was trying to ignore their question by picking a fight. Okay, alright, cool. 

“Because I still believe they deserved it.”

And it was the truth. They were not going to play nice by lying about a hasty understanding to become fast friends or whatever. They had more backbone than that. 

“Judge, jury and executioner, huh.” 

Clover closed their fist. It had never been about that, their mission, they… 

“I bet if you had the chance you too would had taken revenge over those who hurt you.”

Chara tensed up.  

“The monsters have never done anything to you.” Clover tried to ignore their own sinking feeling. “You are just hiding yourself behind some weak moral high ground to try and excuse–”

“I had a mission.”

“Which you did not fulfill, and you fucked your entire world in the way.” Chara snorted. “Way to go, pretender.”

Clover squared up. “You know nothing about me.”

“I don’t need to, because I can see you’ve got dellusions of heroship.”

“That’s not–”

“Not true? Come on, Clover, I know you wanted to play the big savior.” 

“I wanted to right their wrongs!”

“Right their wrongs? Which, exactly? They never did ANYTHING to you!”

“Not to me but–”

“So I am right.”

“No, you’re not.”

“Just admit it, Clover! All that cowboy costume got to your head and–”

“I KNEW ONE OF THE KIDS!” 

Their burst surprised Chara enough they stepped back, but Clover was not done. 

“We grew up together and they were good .” They shut down their eyes, the face of the kid still clear on their memories. “Helped me when I was down, protected me from the other kids, let me take their turn on the TV, always left me leftovers even though they were more hungry…" Their calm voice, their delicate movements, the day they went away to never come back. “Never made fun of me, and always let me watch them dance despite how shy they were. They were so so so good…”

Clover was surprised when they could not hear themselves over their own sobs, not realizing when they had started to cry. 

It had been so long since they remember them, let themselves thought of them. Clover's nostalgia growing into such a strong grief it physically pained them. Until the end they had hoped there was a chance they’d be somewhere in the Underground, hiding and waiting for help. It had been their fault, they took too long to make up their mind. To come down. Maybe then Clover could had actually rescued them. 

Everything had become so numb when their killer had confessed. 

“I never got to them.” They hiccuped “To the king. They told me it had the souls. I wanted them. Take them back home. It was the least I could do.”

Human bodies remained, unlike monsters. Clover wondered where their friend's body laid. If it had been quick, if they didn’t suffer. Clover hoped so.

They did not deserve to die. They had been good . 

Their whimpers echoed. Even if they tried to calm down now, their sorrow had been so hidden and ignored it had bottled up without warning it could not be stopped so easily. Clover kept trying to wipe their tears, but there were so many of them they were now rubbing soft raw skin. It hurt. They bet they were a picture of their own. 

And then, something enveloped them. 

“Stop crying, you look ugly.”

Clover laughed, their runny nose hidden in Chara’s sweater. Chara must be disgusted. They were so tense, it was dayclear they were not used to this, but they were trying. Clover’s chest felt light. 

“Deep down I knew you had feelings.”

“Shut it.”

It felt good. To be embraced by someone you knew cared. 

◇ ◇ ◇

Sometime later, or sooner, or right now; Clover managed to calm down. 

“So, what did the flower had to say?” They said, against their shoulder. 

Chara felt physical mortification when they, admittedly, forgot they were supposed to talk about that. It was such a strong feeling they could feel how they cheeks flared up and they tensed, reaching with their hands Clover’s shoulders to part away from them. 

Clover’s huge, golden eyes were so close it was unnerving. Chara cleared their throat. 

“Well. He said there’s this thing called Determination, or DT for short…” 

◇ ◇ ◇

They’ve now resorted to wander. 

Clover swear it’d keep the ideas coming. Chara called bullshit. 

Clover said they had a plan. Chara said they barely had the scraps of it. 

They both agreed Chara had to go back to investigate further and do some experimentation before committing to anything. 

“Ya know? You were right.”

 Chara smirked. “As I always am, thank you very much.”

“Geez.” Clover elbowed them. “Ever heard of modesty?”

Chara shrugged. “Not really.” 

Clover groaned, raising their hands to their face. Chara snickered. 

“Okay, share with the class. What was I right about?”

They collected themselves and, in Chara’s eyes, tried to play cool. 

“I’m glad you stopped trying to kill me, and killing yourself, all the time.” They smiled, and it was so sincere it took Chara’s breath away. “It was starting to get lonely here, waiting for you.”

Chara needed to get away from this place as soon as possible. 

◇ ◇ ◇

It felt weird to be at the end of the gun willingly, for once.

◇ ◇ ◇

◇ ◇ ◇

◇ ◇ ◇

Chara had barely been back for a second when Clover spoke up. 

“You lied.”

They had almost started to miss their whole weirdness. Almost.

“Greetings, Chara, how are you? How did your journey go? Did you find anything new?” 

Clover did not seem to be amused. Chara quickly ran through a list of anything they may had lied about (a lot) or hidden from them (even more), but could not come up with anything right away. Some sort of uneasiness began to churn in their stomach. 

“You said you were one of the missing kids.”

“Correct.”

“Are you the last one to fall down? The seventh soul they needed?”

It said a lot of Chara’s self control to not facepalm themselves, patience quickly running out. They had more pressing matters and findings to discuss than to bring this back again .

“No, that’s the other kid. The one who lets me use their body.”

“What’s their name?”

“I do not know, I haven’t asked.”

“Gosh, you are rude.”

“I thought we had already established that, yes.” 

Chara looked around, as if anything new could come out of the void to distract them from yet another interrogation. These had gotten old since the first one.

“I was the first one. To fall down I mean.”

Clover frowned. “No, you weren’t.”

“Strange choice of words.” Chara raised an eyebrow. “I’m quite sure I was.”

“I spent weeks researching each case, I would remember you.”

“Then you were not as good as you believed yourself to be.”

“You…” 

Whatever they were about to say was lost as their eyes widened. Chara had a deep, abrupt bad feeling about this. 

“I what?”

Clover twisted their hands, their resolve slipping away as strangely as it had come. 

“Nothing.”

“Say what you mean. Now.”

“It’s really nothing, I swear.” 

They wouldn’t look at them in the eye. Some sort of panic started to arise within Chara. 

“You keep telling me I’m a bad liar and yet you cannot face me.” They grabbed them by their vest. “Tell me. Now.” 

Clover kept on looking anywhere else but on Chara. The crescendo inside them was about to go crazy, and if they didn’t get an answer soon they would-

“You weren’t in the missing poster.” 

It was barely a whisper, but they were so close and this space was empty, it sounded like they had screamed it. 

Something akin to a straight up iron fell in Chara’s stomach. 

It should not be news. They had said it themselves: humans had drove them away in the first place. Chara had not been welcomed where they came from, the people who raised them didn’t claim them, they were on their own. It would make sense they’d not search for them. Most probably they had been relieved they had finally gotten rid of them. 

Of course they had not even tried to report them, to let people know of their absence. People called them family but Chara would rather die than to be related to them in any way. Now that they knew what a true family was, now that

“Chara.” 

they understood there was something deeply wrong with those people. And maybe you were related, maybe their blood passed something onto you. Something evil and twisted. Or maybe that’s just your poor reason to try and believe there was no way to avoid the creature you’ve become. That you were always meant to become this. Maybe they knew, maybe they tried to fix you, when 

“Chara!”

they grabbed you to hit you to harm you to beat you and you wished you could just take you knife and

“CHARA!”

stab them. 

◇ ◇ ◇

This was not part of your plan. Or it was, but not this way. Not like this.

You don’t know what happened. Did Clover let it happen? Did you truly caught them off guard? 

One moment it had been hard to breath, think, exist. The next, Clover’s yellow soul was in front of you.

You are aware you were aiming for this. The long run. Backstab the moment they least expected it. 

Their body, lying on the ground. They’re bleeding, but that shouldn’t be possible. You both are dead, ghosts don’t bleed. 

But was there any purpose in your own actions? Had you not been stalling for too long?

The despair in their eyes is everything you’ve been craving. Sweet cold revenge. For their wrongdoings. For challenging you in the first place.

You had plenty of chances to do it, all along. What was really stopping you?

You wanted to see it. In their eyes. Reflected on them. The pain, the hopelessness, their soul leaving their body.

You hate it. 

◇ ◇ ◇

There was no powerful being waiting for you, just judgment.

You feel the foreign Determination rush through your body. 

Their broken yellow soul lasts remains for a few seconds longer. Their very last Determination keeping it together by scraps.

It’s not going to last long.

Suddenly, you realize what you’ve been missing and had always been there, just barely out of reach. 

You realize you can RESET. 

So you do.

◇ ◇ ◇

You have your knife out. 

“You killed me.”

You did.

“You stopped it.”

You did.

“Why?”

Because you didn’t want to be alone. 

◇ ◇ ◇

◇ ◇ ◇

◇ ◇ ◇

Chara dropped the knife. 

◇ ◇ ◇

It had been so, so, so simple. The answer had been in front of them the entire time. 

Well. They did need this whole time to come to terms with one another. If not, the idea would had never crossed Chara’s mind. 

Wouldn’t be nice, to finally end this world once and for all, and to go for the next one, and the next, and next; until they could find a world just for the two of them?

It was too good to be true, and Chara tended to be wary of fairytales and the like. They did not believe in good endings. They thought them a scam for the weak, for miserable people with miserable lives to depend on. 

But, for once, they were not against the idea. Of their very own, happy ending. 

◇ ◇ ◇

“I’ve come to a plan you and me both will surely agree upon. And it’s quite simple to test.”

Chara took Clover’s hands, interlaced their fingers. Their souls beating at one rhythm. 

“I’ve come to think of you as a companion. And it would saddened me to leave you behind.”

“You actually need me to do whatever plan you got, don’tcha?” Clover tilted their head. “You’re still a bad liar.”

“Maybe I am.” 

And Chara kissed their hand, just to see their reaction. It was exactly what they expected.  

◇ ◇ ◇

Chara guides them, telling them where to look for, what to do with the energy within them.

It’s a weird feeling, to recognize something within you you had not been aware of. It’s like the air on your lungs, the blood in your veins, the pores in your skin. It’s just so natural, it shouldn’t even be said.

And yet. 

To become self-aware of the Determination in your soul.

Clover TRUE RESETS.

◇ ◇ ◇

◇ ◇ ◇

◇ ◇ ◇

You wake up, but you aren’t alone. 

“Hey pal, easy there. You okay?” That was a long fall. Let us help you out.” 

Something softly pushes you to a sitting position. Your head hurts, but for once you feel safe. 

The voice rambles on. “Name’s Clover. The other one’s Chara, but they’re kinda shy so don’t be too harsh on them.”

“Hey!”

You give a lil chuckle, you seem to think of them as good friends. 

“I’d not give us that category.”

“Where are you? I can’t see you”   You sign.

“We are dead. Ghosts, hauntings if you will.” 

In the right angle against the light, you could almost make up two silhouettes. 

 “Glad to see you can talk." A beat of silence "Or not. Communicate.” 

You cringe. 

“Way to make it awkward.” Clover sighs. “Sorry for their rudeness.” If you could see them, you swear Clover would be rolling their eyes. “What about you, rough fall?” 

You check yourself and shake your head.

“What happened to you?”

“Nothing we cannot tell you on our journey. You desire to leave this place, right?”

You nod. 

“Sweet! Relax, we’ll guide you the whole way.”

And we will.