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Chapter Text

Being in the Navy had never really been the plan, technically a contractor and not enlisted but that didn’t make much of a difference, it was still the military and I for damn sure was not a fan of the predatory practices of the imperial army of America… but they gave me a grant and it was for a good project so I had to swallow my general ethics and instead follow where the research took me – that’s what my PI had said too about the whole ordeal when I explained my misgivings about where the money originated from. The biggest employers for oceanography were academic institutions, big oil, and the US military.

It was really crushing to get that epiphany but at least I had a job. Crazy how as a kid I pictured myself more along the lines of someone working primarily at an academic institution – I also had no idea how closely linked so many of the colleges were with the military.

Working on Naval Base Coronado had its ups and downs, the downs being around an ungodly amount of people constantly. I found that the base somehow was the most populated place on the whole west coast – totally hyperbolic but it sure felt that way trying to get around and always having someone within spitting distance. I came from a tiny town. The kindergarten through twelfth grade was a total of 200 students small, neighboring districts had even less but we had pretty decent tax money to go towards having a real school building and not portables so parents pushed to get their kids enrolled. I would like to think that there were mostly ups at Coronado though, the science was good and my PI was pretty hands off letting me run on my own in a way that felt freeing. I mean, it was post-doc, at this point if I couldn’t work independently, they should take my degree back and burn it. One of the biggest ups for me though was when I was allowed on the ships for a cruise out.

We had a couple of projects I was collecting data for long term monitoring both at sea and on land, thankfully I liked to be busy and we had a few other researchers I was collaborating with to move each one along. I just happened to be the greenest in the field and the one that loved field research the most – even though people study oceanography it doesn’t mean they want to be on the water. Most were modelers, and as much as I appreciated machine learning I could only do a basic random forest model without wanting to tear my hair out. That left me happily taking up as many of the cruises as I could get on, often times not even on the spots for the research designated vessels, the agreement with the university and the base was if there was enough room and I had the facilities, I could be shuffled onto a handful of the navy boats since I applied for clearance.

Most of the time if I was on a cruise I was dropping an imaging system called a In Situ Ichthyoplankton Imaging System (ISIIS), a little contraption like a high-powered camera tugged behind the boat to check out what was in the water. My sweet little plankton had a habit of messing up sonar systems and in some cases, the boats stirred up the cuties causing fluorescence and lighting up the position of boats and other marine crafts like an easily identifiable target in the water. The point was to learn the habits of things like phytoplankton and zooplankton so cruises could avoid problems in high tension situations.

I had tried to convince the Navy to let me get an Imaging FlowCytobot, a flow through system attached to a ship that would take continuous images unlike the ISSIIS but that would require way more work and a dedicated vessel that the Navy was unwilling to provide me with any of those facilities. I wasn’t technically stationed in the Navy and only a post-doc at one of affiliated universities so it was more feasible for me to hop around ships where there was room rather than modify an existing one when there were other ships dedicated to research alone – I was unwilling to tie myself to a single ship too. I wasn’t a part of the U.S. Academic Research Fleet exclusively, they already had 17 oceanographic vessels and such which operated out of different areas, trying to petition for more was like pulling teeth but it never hurt to ask every quarter during budget meetings.

Of course, on top of the ISSIIS I had other methods coupled with the imaging systems because my work was nothing if not thorough, I also had a cool little device called a Satlantic HyperPro which was a fun little drop too behind the ship to help figure out the optical properties in the water which helps verify the density and total particle load that the ISIIS measured. It had so many cool features, my favorite of course was using to measure the chlorophyll content to help pinpoint photosynthetically available radiation, plus of course the ever-important reflectance for the Navy research too. It was much easier than filtering - but when I could manage it, I was throwing a CTD probe too. I could profile everything chemical from temperature to dissolved oxygen content at different levels in the water but it wasn’t always the case. Navy ships weren’t really set up for research, they were set up for war and trying to coordinate activities with enough time to plan ahead was a pain in my ass.

I used a combination of other machines too with the ISSIIS for a more resolute view of what I was seeing in the images, verification was always important and the more I knew the better I could inform what was going on in the sea. That included a Hyper-Spectral Backscatter probe which uses electromagnetic radiation that is reflected back so I could get a better grasp on size and composition of particles with an added LISST-200X which used laser diffraction, where a laser is emitted through a sample and the scattering of what light comes back could be used to tell not only size but concentration. That combined with a Spectral Absorption and Attenuation Sensor to use as an underwater fluorometer to measure the light emitted by a particle which helped better categorize whatever was suspended.

So many little black machines of varying shapes and sizes I tossed overboard and prayed gave me enough data to be able to make a conclusion from. The sheer volume of data alone had me baffled sometimes during blooms because, even though my focus was small, I could end up with billions of little blips that I was trying to categorize.

Less… organic when my main focuses was biological oceanography. I had always focused more on the biological aspect rather than geochemical or physical. Not that I didn’t respect it but to be honest, my ass was not built for understanding chemistry or physics in the way that some of the other researchers did. I loved me some carbon cycling and trying to understand the energy fluxes based on nitrogen, iron, and phosphorous in the ocean but it was always a topic that had me holding my head between my legs and willing what I was seeing to sink in and take so I could make a coherent thought.

Thankfully we all had niches, and mine was as close that I could keep to biological oceanography. I had started out with the basic principles, near and dear to my heart were the net tows. More labor intensive than tossing a machine down to read but it was the inspiration behind my passion. Twice a day without fail when the sun was at its lowest and when it was at its highest and the ship had the facilities for it, and I treasured every sample, sometimes getting lost under the microscope for hours that I normally should be sleeping just to catch a peek at the pretty organisms I was studying before I froze down size fractionally sorted pellets to be burned for biomass readings later.

Cruses were busy. Insanely so. Yeah, I had help from the on-board crew for casting a device over and reeling in nets but the rest of it was up to me. I pushed fifteen-hour rotations for days at a time before crashing for a couple full days after when I made it back to land and a truck load of data sorting after. Ones that made my computer whirr louder than the planes that landed and took off on the flight deck of some of the boats while it tried to run R and the rest of the data packages to asses what each of my tools was seeing.

The ocean was where my heart was at, it always had been. Growing up even, playing in the waters in my little land locked state, the water always called me. It started with a cheap discovery kids’ microscope and our local pond that always turned a pungent green in the heat of the summer months from toxic cyanobacteria blooms.

Who could’ve thought that would bring me to now studying picoplankton all the way up to some of the macroplankton. My drifters. The prettiest little organisms that were captured in my casts to dazzle me and my mind. Helping the military not lose, yes, but also allowing me to help worldwide sampling efforts to track blooms to inform everything from climate change to biodiversity indexes. Bigger picture always made it less grueling and more rewarding when I assessed where I ended up.

Now it was just keeping my head above water and remembering to live my life outside of the lab. That was my biggest comment from my PI, Kaia, had said. A woman larger than life with more knowledge crammed into her brain than any other human I had met. Warm and approachable, with kindness to match. I tried really hard to heed her advice, which meant I wasn’t allowed to hole up in the lab and sort samples under the scope in my free time as my only other hobby.

I had picked up Triva nights on Tuesday at the Hard Deck when I was on land which led to me picking up Friday nights to dance. It wasn’t like home with the continuous line dance opportunities but it had a good vibe and I had become fond of Penny Benjamin. Her and I rolled into town around the same time, when she bought the bar, it was nice to know someone else who wasn’t in service and trying to find their footing in this town.

 I had found a passion too when her daughter, Amelia, had started to ask me about my research and came to me with questions of her own to help tutor her. Being 14, she was just barely in high school, and this kid was gifted and dedicated to her education. I was decent enough at math, English, and biology that I could help her. Once a month her, and much of the other teens on base, would gather at one of the parks or the Hard Deck when the weather wasn’t permitting and we had a great time working on homework and projects together.

I didn’t have family here but I had quickly become a part of that little community all thanks to Penny. It was why lingering around the Hard Deck felt safe and familiar even when there were enough people to make my chest crawl inside because all I could picture was me breathing in other people’s air.

Since I wasn’t recovering from being at sea and wasn’t getting ready to ship off, I was at the Hard Deck like most of the other Friday’s nursing an AMF because I came to have fun, and I lived only half a mile away from the bar so it was easy walking when drunk to get home. Or I could sleep on the beach like some of the other military people I’d seen who had too much but couldn’t secure a ride home.

I had a cup of peanuts, a bag of homemade bread I had left over from my lunch, and a drink. It was a good night for people watching and relaxing, when it got a bit more packed, I could dissolve into the crowd and dance without worry someone could actually see me. I waved at Penny, already through one drink, I had shown up extra early because I was skimming one of the papers that had just come out on eDNA applications for community dynamics modeling in the Indo-Pacific over the past ten years from long term CTD samples.

I liked it because it might not have as applicable since I was on the bottom of the California Current system starting at Vancouver in Canada all the way down to Baja, but it was still interesting reading novel takes on longstanding samples. Plus, I could artificially peer pressure myself into studying like I would do in college sitting in the library, this was just a bit more fun and had better beverage opportunities.

I waved at Penny and grinned at her, flagging her down so I could get a refill since it had been over an hour between drinks for me. She mixed the drink but before I could pay the bell rang loudly. My brows pitched and some old guy had broken her special little rule, the phone on the bar, something that I was lucky Amelia had saved me from when I did it the first time. Penny was nice enough to let me off the hook when I was there with her kid trying to tutor, and if I brought my laptop to work, she would save me a table if I texted her beforehand. It was better than a coffeeshop to work because she was open way later, I knew I wasn’t always the most productive if I went home even if I wanted to believe I would be.

I grinned, sipping my now free drink as I watched her give him a hard time. The guy looked to be around her age, hairs not yet grey which told me he either had really good genetics or the more logical reason – this man dyed his hair. That uniform and matte color told me more that he was spending a good chunk of change on salon products rather than winning the lottery on not aging. He had those deep-set crow’s feet around his eyes and that wrinkle around his neck that showed he had to be around fifty. And really against sunscreen, that tan line around his jaw screamed exposed neck without any UV protection and long sun exposure times.

This man when he smiles has a tooth in the middle of his head, I realized after I had been staring for far too long. It made me giggle a little, for all the work he put into his appearance it seems he missed that little fact. At least his teeth were straight even when they weren’t in line with other parts of his dace. He smiled at Penny though like she was a goddess and I had to appreciate that fact, she smiled back with that flirty brow raise I wasn’t even sure I had seen before.

I decided I had been staring long enough at one spot and I scanned around the scarcely spotted bar. Someone was playing darts, an idiot covered the white guy with the jawline that reminded me of Angelina Jolie’s sharp angles. I wanted to throw something at them because that was such a dangerous move and I really hated how drunk people and darts could spell disaster. I could see a sandy blonde man with wire glasses sitting near them, hunched with just a cup of peanuts quietly observing too. Instantly I was worrying for that man’s safety because there was no way that he wouldn’t be first to take a hit if those buffoons lost control.

I tore my eyes away so I could pack up my little set up at the bar as people started to file in. My research papers, note pads, sticky notes, pens, and highlighters couldn’t be taking up the spaces next to me if I was going to continue to hang out at the bar. I heard a loud voice, cocky, ring out again, “What do we have here?”

I had come to people watch and by god I was going to do that when something sounded interesting so I looked up from my clean up to see the three guys from before getting approached by a model level gorgeous woman with two men flanking her. That tan of her Service Khaki somehow worked for her, something I didn’t often find out here. Of course, nothing beat the Service Dress Whites that made anyone look good but that tan washed out so many people that I swore they picked the color just to be ugly.

The cocky man had his friend, with the crispest lines in his hair that had me impressed, greeted the woman. Her friends: a man with a strong nose that reminded me more of a pretty boy actor than a military man, and a taller man with that regulation mustache that made it easy to spot an enlisted man even out of uniform. They seemed to know each other and for longer than it should’ve taken, the man with the glasses wasn’t even acknowledged.

Until the pretty woman jutted her chin towards him. That smile, awkward and sweet as he cleared off the peanut shells to introduce himself had me smiling in return even from across the bar. They chatted and she seemed genuinely enthused by his appearance. I was watching intently; I caught her lips move and his name had an ‘F’ in it. She motioned to the pool table and he was standing; I could make out his name badge ‘Floyd’.

He was tall, that was the first thing I noted when he stood, towering over the woman by a good few inches. He hunched his shoulders though, like he was scared to be physically imposing, awkward in that endearing way that spoke volumes about his confidence level. He moved to the pool table to rack up the shots and I had the sudden urge to join.

Not that I had ever been a joiner but the way that man’s hand slid up and down the cue had me salivating like one of Pavlov’s dogs. I was a sucker for a good set of hands and he had ones that made those little resin balls look tiny. I could fake not knowing how to play, it would be easy really to have him pressed up close and cradling my arms to help line up a shot.

It was cheesy and completely unrealistic but damn my imagination was vivid with more than five shots in my system, I mean a single AMF here had a shot of each vodka, gin, rum, tequila, and blue curaçao – my second glass was half way gone. I was well on my way even with my snacks to being more than tipsy. Which is why I knew I could really pull off that silly and clueless thing that guys liked so much.

That Cocky Guy came up to order four more on the old guy, presumably for the cute one with glasses, girl, and her friends since they didn’t have drinks. I had the idea of running the cute guy with glasses his drink. It was impulsive but guys bought girls drinks all the time for attention, who could it hurt to give him a drink back? It was completely irrational and a dumb move on my part to approach a guy that I hardly knew who was already with a group of people, no one wanted to be approached in a large group. Plus, he seemed so quiet, I wondered if such a strong come on would bother him.

And yet I considered it as Penny handed the beers off and Cocky Guy returned to his group. I saw Floyd break and land a good shot, hand eye coordination never looked so sexy. The way he was focused on the ball, bending over, had me picturing something else he could bend over that pool table. Again, a total cliché that every person had thought of once but it wouldn’t be so popular if it wasn’t such a sexy thought.

But that little fantasy was interrupted when the annoying and cocky one came over to snatch a cue. I hadn’t even noticed they’d been joined by a guy with that stupid little military mustache because I had been salivating over Floyd and his game, but he was dressed way down in an Aloha shirt unbuttoned and flapping over a white t-shirt. It seemed Cocky Guy was going in for some sort of dick measuring contest. I snickered watching the woman line up a shot and smack him in the stomach but that quickly died looking back to the cocky white guy. I was really not a fan of this guy and once again I felt the urge to insert myself just to smack him with that wooden stick the same way the girl did.

There was definitely underlying tension between Cocky Guy and Aloha Shirt but I couldn’t hear them well enough with the bar picking up activity. I should’ve looked harder at his nametag when he was close, calling him Cocky Guy was getting annoying while I tried to follow their whole group.

My eyes were yanked from the scene when Penny told someone their card declined, the old guy who she was making bedroom eyes at. I winced, poor dude like any other reasonable person didn’t just have the funds to throw down on a round for a whole bar even at opening.

The bell rang again and “Overboard!” started to get chanted all around me. I knew what that meant, and before I could even blink Cocky Guy – Seresin – and his buddies Machado and Fitch, all grabbed the old guy and was carrying him off. I don’t know why I was so invested, normally I didn’t even bother to try and learn the names of the people I watched because it didn’t matter.

But Floyd was too cute to not take a special interest in and his buddies. I wasn’t sure sober me would remember their names but I would sure remember Floyd. Speaking of, my eyes drifted back to where he was standing with his buddies where Aloha Shirt was sat and belting the words to “Great Balls of Fire”, an old song really at this point but it had the whole bar up and dancing together to sing the words.

It was adorable to watch Floyd dance, meaning he was just kind of shaking in that jerky way kids did. I wondered if the man had ever really danced before or if it was because his friends had their arms around him and were pulling him like a ragdoll. Something made my chest squeeze because those sorts of antics were something I craved, being a little silly and a little fun.

Kaia had said I really needed to get out of the lab and I was starting to think that she was right.

I was thankful he was so caught up in his friends he didn’t notice me watching because I didn’t even have the mind to take a break between glances and look anywhere else. He was too cute and fun to see all of them laughing and talking. I couldn’t hear them over the din of the bar and I was craving to know what his voice sounded like. He struck me as soft, the way his jaw moved and his mouth seemed to swallow vowels in the diphthong in the song had me wondering if he had a bit of an accent, nothing like a full southern accent but maybe a lithe.

I was really watching this man’s mouth. Watching his smile and lips move. His teeth were white and straight, one of the front ones slightly bigger than the other in the way that told me it wasn’t some veneers or cosmetic shaping. When he had moments of a big smile, he had deep lines around his nose that pulled into dimples at his cheeks.

Jesus fuck dimples were cute.

Yes, they were a muscle pit but fuck, I really liked them on his face. Somehow, they were sexy in a way that made my heart race but cute and boyish that left him nonthreatening. I was locked in on his mouth, that bottom lip being fuller. Still a white man but in comparison he didn’t have the same paper-thin lips that I had seen around here that pulled back into the distinctive midwestern, closed lip smile of acknowledgement.

In that moment I really wanted to know how it would be to kiss him. He was clean shaven, skin smoother than should be allowed for a man who couldn’t appreciate the work that went in to trying to keep that skin from looking like a backroad with potholes. I had thought his eyes were originally brown but when he smiled, they lit up in that dark blue that reminded me of what the ocean looked like off the bow of the boat towards dusk on a rainy day. That was a problem, comparing him to the ocean was a sign that I was getting in too deep thirsting after him.

I decided to close out my tab with Penny before the second drink somehow convinced me I was invincible and I got daring enough to approach Floyd. “You aren’t going to keep eating that boy alive?” Penny joked as she handed me my card back and I felt my face heat more than just alcohol could be blamed for.

“You know I just look,” I muttered grabbing my bag.

“Oh, I know, you’ve never looked this long though. Maybe it’s time to stop window shopping,” she said more like a mom than a friend. I shook my head and waved her off.

“It’s the alcohol, it made me slow and he was just easy to look at and follow,” I said rolling my eyes at her.

“The alcohol made you thirsty and you’re eyeing that boy like he’s the last drink of water,” she again knowing full well I never looked this long at people. I liked sitting back and experiencing social interactions passively to avoid being rejected if I ever did try and engage face first.

I took my bag and stumbled a bit trying to stand. I normally had two drinks but I was off kilter because I had been more focused on Floyd than trying to leave, looking for my last glimpse before he disappeared like Cinderella after the ball. San Diego was a huge city and god knows how long he was going to be stationed here; I didn’t have my hopes up that he would hang around long enough to catch a second showing.

“Do you need me to get someone to walk you home?” Penny asked watching me stumble. I shook my head at her and then she laughed, more like she snorted.

“You’re trying to leave and you’re still watching him!” She accused.

“I’m just drunk enough I can’t multitask. I had to watch my passing ship before he was gone forever,” I wheezed out a laugh as I finally managed to peel my eyes away from that pretty blonde hair and turned to leave sending Penny a friendly wave before I started my walk home. It normally was a good fifteen minutes while I was this tipsy.

I managed to get home, my hand on my taser at all times just in case and my head on a swivel. I may be drunk but I wasn’t stupid. And like every Friday night I was alone. This time though I had the memories of Floyd to warm me, and that pretty smile of his.

Chapter Text

The Hard Deck was crowded, more so than normal. It wasn’t November so there was no way it was fleet week with so many of those service members bringing a crazy amount of business to our little city. Most of the time I didn’t even leave my house during November because there were just too many tourists trying to catch themselves someone in white.

I couldn’t even see Penny as I tried to weave through the crowd, I watched the little model airplanes change all over the roof. It was fun to sit there and try and figure out what the hell the plane was and what it could be used for plus the mug chandeliers really added character. I had asked Penny the inspiration for it and she had mentioned that they were for some sort of squadron thing, they had names and such even on them which I was impressed with.

Never saw my name up there but I knew it was a bit harder to find a duplicate last name around these parts when my family was from another area. I drifted towards the back of the bar bumping into faceless people. Normally I would pay more attention, I liked to see the different parts of people’s outfits and how they brought them together. It was the biggest annoyance for me in the military because so many of them were cookie cutter and didn’t stand out – well besides those badges and such they wore on their uniform but I always had to have a reference book out to try and decipher the meanings of those.

I jumped when I felt an arm around my waist and I was instantly smacking at it. “Get the fuck off!” I growled when I felt a nose at the nape of my neck. I didn’t take kindly to being touched without permission, I was searching for Penny to rat out the asshole who decided to touch me to get some help. “Hey bud, fucking let go!” I yelled managing to turn around so I could hit their chest…

Those pretty blue eyes framed by those gold glasses frame.

“Floyd?” I muttered confused. He was in that tan outfit again with his pretty little ribbons. I touched them and tilted my head, distracted because they were blurry, like something was in my eye. I could see some colors but I really couldn’t make out anything distinguishing. He had his wings though, so a fly boy then? “You managed to make it into the Navy but you decided the sky is where you were going to be? Not smart enough for the air force,” I muttered watching the light reflect off the pretty gold as it glittered in a slight joke.

He had those little squire things on his collar… a lieutenant? A senior junior officer. Three something. I had this whole conversation because I called a guy’s little collar flair boring and he went on this long tangent about how important commissioned officers were with all the leadership and management with that fancy degree and training rather than an enlisted rank that have the super high specializations. It was over an hour of his yapping and all I got out of it was he thought he was all high and mighty even though he was just sort of important, not exactly a general but not entry level either.

Floyd didn’t say anything, just smiled at me softly and tilted my chin up to stop looking at his uniform and instead to pay attention to him. “Oh? And why are you breaking my concentration, I was trying to remember all my little trivia on the intricacies of the military uniform,” I waited for his response but he just had that soft smile. One that made my stomach flip.

“Not a talker?” I teased and Floyd just tilted his head at me like he was amused by my backtalk. Slowly his fingers moved from my chin to hold my cheek, they were warm and had that same rough texture that people got when they worked with their hands a lot – even with moisturizer it was impossible to beat. I had those hard callouses on the inside of my thumb from the lines I had cast, not as solid as his but still noticeable that I didn’t have dainty hands like women were expected to have.

His other hand came up to rest on my hip, big enough to go around the front and the back. I wasn’t a thin person by any definition but he had quite the expanse for his grip. “Why so quiet, I saw you making a few jokes with your friends earlier,” I was pretty confused why he was just standing there, holding my face. I was hoping to get a reaction out of him, words, I’d settle for just a few if it meant hearing his voice. He just laughed a silent chuckle and leaned in to press his lips to mine.

I guess I could handle quiet if I was getting kisses.

I brought my hand up to rest on his shoulder, which was much taller than I had expected. Being short and curvy meant I was stretching and so was he. But god did I love watching a man dip to kiss. My other hand went to play in that short hair of his, with a little whisp in the front that told me he’d have some pretty cute curls if he could grow it out.

His kiss was soft to start, just a few gentle brushes of his lips against mine before his grip got tighter and I was being walked back. Somehow the room cleared to give him a path that didn’t have me bumping into people. If I had been paying more attention I would’ve asked why I suddenly had a clear path and why the bar was so much quieter, just the sound of our shared kiss with that soft smack of lips.

My ass hit the pool table, and he was sliding the hand on my hip under to lift me onto the hard surface since it was hip height and I couldn’t stand tall enough to get there on my own without a hop. The hand on my chin trailed down to my throat and he was leaning me back against the surface of the pool table. It was a lot rougher than I had imagined and my head was lower than my hips with the lip. But he was still kissing me and his mouth was moving faster, teeth nipping at my lips asking for entrance.

Who was I to deny such a polite request, Floyd was soft in the way he asked for permission like that. Slow. I felt like I could easily tell him off and shoo him away and he would take it so respectfully. I wasn’t hurried or rushed as I parted my lips for him. He tasted like those peanuts he was eating, a little salty as I licked his lips myself. It wasn’t the worst flavor ever as I licked across his teeth trying to egg him on.

My leg was guided to wrap around his hip and his mouth left mine to trail wet kisses along my throat. “Stealth kind of guy?” I giggled and he bit at my skin playfully but still didn’t talk. I was started to get concerned with his silence and I used the hand in his hair to tug his face up to look at me. Not even a grunt or a whine in protest, his face lifted and he fixed me with a heated look.

“Seriously, why are we going with the quiet approach?” I asked trying to ignore the thrum in my body and the desire to just let it go so he could go back to my neck. I had always enjoyed my neck and chest getting attention more than I had enjoyed most other parts of sex.

Floyd shook his head with that small, boyish grin, and applied pressure as he leaned down to reattach his mouth to my neck like he was just amused by my questions. It seemed he was just as eager to continue our touches, just as much as I was. I tried to let it go, the silence of the whole ordeal, even if it wigged me out a little, I could overlook it because this was a cute guy kissing me just how I liked. I could always get words later, force a conversation maybe if I locked him with my thighs.

And then he sucked harder at my skin and I whined because I knew for a fact this man was going to leave a few hickeys if he kept that up. My plotting to try and force him into conversation stalled out as he continued his focus on marking my neck up like a pretty canvas. Call me a cheap whore but I was really into those, I liked the primal aspect of the act of claiming someone with those little bites and bruises. Being able to see them in the mirror when I saw my reflection or feeling that soft ache when I thought about them too long throughout the day without fail would be a surefire way to get me going.

The hand that I hadn’t been focused on, the one on my thigh that had my leg wrapped around his hip, had shifted to the small of my back giving him purchase to rock me into him at an urgency I wasn’t aware he had with how slowly he was working down my neck. I squeaked as he shoved me further along the table so he could get up on top of me.

“Watch the fucking fabric there Floyd,” I muttered pulling my hand from his hair to smack his back in retaliation. I could feel the ache already from a mild rugburn on my back but he didn’t seem to hear me as he was working my shirt over my head now that he was hovering over me. He used his arms at my stomach to hold me down while his hips rut into mine.

It was then I felt the push of his bulge against me, a size I wouldn’t have expected of such a shy man. “Oh, shit Floyd!” I yelped as his intensity picked up and I was feeling him practically drag all from the end of my ass up to the front bumping on my clit. I was not prepared for this man to get out of those khakis because the resulting monster would ache for days.

My shirt was bunched at my chest, the cotton t-shirt was easy enough for him to maneuver off of me, using a hand to help me sit up before it was tossed across the bar somewhere. I remembered vaguely that there were people but when I opened my eyes to look all I could see was Floyd with his eyes closed and his glasses askew as he trailed hot kisses down my chest.

Now that was a sight, a pink flush along his cheeks, those eyes closed in concentration as his tongue poked out and drug along my skin. Another soft whine escaped my lips as he mouthed me through the thin fabric, I used to keep my chest in place so I didn’t have to worry about them bouncing while I was trying to work.

And he was biting at me the next second, I saw a flash of those pretty straight teeth before they were latching onto my nipple through the fabric. A whine at the back of my throat that sounded more strangled than before came out because I wanted the fabric out of the way for his mouth. The chill from his saliva with the wet fabric was enough to have me trying to push at his chest to get it off.

Floyd was not willing to detach for a second but I managed to wiggle the offending fabric up and over my head, a glorified headband my friends would call it but it worked much better. I now wondered if I should’ve listened about getting a real bra because this whole fight to get it off without Floyd removing his mouth had me frustrated at not just myself but the clothing.

I didn’t have much time to think on it before he was biting at my nipple, no fabric to slow the pinch of pain that had me arching into his hand. The other left my neck to pull and twist at the one he wasn’t currently sucking on. Without the extra layer of my shirt, I could feel the rough material of the table biting into my skin, Floyd on top of me. That little aviator insignia chilled against my stomach as he folded over me.

Everywhere I looked there was Floyd, and I was acutely aware of the fact that he was moving lower and with that he was dragging my jeans with him. It was quite the sight to see a full uniform naval officer stripping me in with those proud and pressed clothes fully intact. “I think, you have too many clothes,” I protested which fell on deaf ears – or really, I think he couldn’t hear me because the second he was low enough the man was diving between my legs like an Olympic champion and he was wearing my thighs as earmuffs.

I had enough time to process this but not so much that I could’ve prepared myself for the open mouth make out the man was doing sloppy against my core. The digging of the band into my hip bone told me that he hadn’t even waited to try and get them off, just removing the jeans enough to get a taste and decided to deal with the rest later.

“Floyd!” I yelped because both his hands were on my hips maneuvering me on his face to ride. My hands went to find something to try and grab to ground myself but there was nothing on the table besides the short fabric. It was great to get the balls to roll but not so much for girls to use to ride a cute boy’s face. I could hear the creak of his glasses and in a moment of clarity I propped myself up to remove them from his face out of fear they would break.

I set them down by my head and as a thank you, Floyd used all that military strength to tear my perfectly good panties from my body. “Hey! You know those are like fifteen bucks a piece you asshole, you can eat me out as much as you want but you can’t go tearing my good underwear!” I huffed.

I got the words out to complain and in apology he went straight to sucking on my clit. There was no build up, no teasing like the rest of this had been, he went in for the kill like a targeted missel. I could do nothing besides mewl and whimper and reach for his head to try and hold him as close as possible chasing my orgasm.

His hands were digging into the meat of my thighs, sure to leave his hand prints to admire tomorrow, I wouldn’t complain about that. A rugburn and ruined clothes? Yes.

I rode his face unapologetically; I felt him let go of one of my thighs and then there was a pressure at my canal. “You have thick fucking fingers there Floyd,” I groaned as the digit slipped right inside. I knew I was slick already from my combined juices and his spit but I was surprised even with the pressure he was able to get inside of me like that.

The way he was petting my insides and had my hips angled against his face put that pressure in the sweet zone, my g spot lighting up. As he stroked me and sucked on my clit like it was candy, I was moving faster towards an orgasm but one that I knew was going to make more of a mess than I was willing to make on Penny’s nice pool table. A second and third finger were slid inside faster than the first scissoring me open. “Floyd, Floyd, fuck Floyd,” I babbled trying to get his attention. “Cum… I’m going to… it’s different Floyd… No, no, no… mess!” My words were broken between whines and I could hardly string a coherent sentence to warn him.  

Rather than bail, it was like I had said the magic words for him to increase his speed and enthusiasm. I squealed because there was no stopping it at this point. My body started to bare down on his fingers before the orgasm actually hit. My thighs locked around his head and I stopped breathing, everything snapped all at once and I squirt against his face. It wasn’t a little orgasm either, between the heavy petting and the way he had me angled I knew I was drenching his face.

For the first time I heard him make a noise, a deep growl as he continued to eat me all the way through my orgasm until I was crying actual, fat tears and trying to shove him away. He drew out the orgasm longer than the normal few seconds of pleasure, peaking me up and rolling on the tides like an ebb and flow that was the right side of overwhelming. Rather than move though when I tried to push him away, my wrists were grabbed by the hand on my hip and yanked away from his face as he nipped my clit in punishment. It set off a secondary orgasm too close to the waves of the first that had me sobbing and trying to get purchase with my legs to push myself away from his mouth.

He was literally holding me by my pelvic floor with his fingers inside of me pressed to his face while he lapped at me through the second orgasm until I couldn’t even kick to try and escape because it took every ounce of strength with it. I was boneless on the table when he eventually pulled back. His face was shiny, wet, and flushed. He looked self-satisfied with a cocky glint in those dark blue eyes while he looked at me like the plate of food he finished at a holiday dinner.

He looked at my wrists and his smile softened, bringing them up to his lips while he peppered kisses on the red skin where I had been yanking against him in an apology. He leaned up and connected our mouths in the same sloppy and wet kiss he was doing against my cunt, the familiar taste of my release on his tongue. I mean, who hadn’t sampled the buffet before you let someone eat? Tangy and musky, not my favorite but also not the worst flavor in the world.

I missed his hands moving his pants down just enough to free his cock but I didn’t miss them on my ass again angling my hips, “You can’t be trying for another,” I squeaked when I felt the chill of his fly on the soft skin of my ass. Rather than respond though, Floyd gave me that same boyish smile I had seen while he was singing as he spread my legs.

It was some sort of sin for him to smile like that, so innocently, while he was preparing to defile my body. “I don’t think I can take another Floyd,” I whined and he shook his head in that way that said he disagreed with my ability to take it. His hand pet against my mound in a reverent way before I felt him aim and notch his cock against my entrance. “Seriously I feel like my pussy is crying already Floyd,” I complained and then I felt that stretch and my body was reminding me that I was empty.

I was still so wet from both of my orgasms, my slick dripping out of me, giving enough glide that he slipped the first few centimeters in without resistance. I tried to breathe through it, relax the muscles, but I could feel the stretch the second under his head started to feed inside of me.

“Good god Fly Boy, how do you walk with that thing,” I muttered as I tried to prop myself up on my elbows to catch a glimpse of his cock. Floyd just shook his head and shushed me, smiling as he leaned back down to kiss me. I figured the cute kiss and impromptu make out session was to distract from the fact he was splitting me open on his cock. “Fuck,” I wheezed out as he slowly rocked himself inside of me.

With my mouth leaving his, he went back to peppering kisses down my neck and zoned back in on my breasts. I couldn’t figure out what I was trying to focus on more with his mouth back at my tits and his cock bulling its way inside of me. It was like it never ended as he nipped and sucked at my chest. I lost my ability to talk as I tried to widen my knees to accommodate the stretch like that.

I had the mind to glance around the room to see the colors of the Hard Deck and it was like I was reminded that I was in public, completely nude, splayed out like the cover of a nude-y mag, while one of the aviators fucked me in front of his friends. But it was like I was high; the colors of people were swirled and unclear like I couldn’t focus my eyes long enough to picture who they were.

It made sense, Floyd was currently fucking my brains out against this table. He could’ve fucked all my sense away because I was letting him do this. I couldn’t bring myself to shove him away as he pressed impossibly closer, folding his body over me drawing my attention back to the fact his cock was deep enough to impact my breathing. I looked back at the beautiful man that had me laid out on the table while he sucked on my chest like he was going to get a treat out of it.

This man knew how to feast, and use that mouth.

I missed it against mine and I tugged at his hair bringing our mouths together. My tongue inside his mouth, rubbing against his. My chest wasn’t forgotten though, his hands going to massage my tits in a way that I wasn’t sure if it was therapeutic or erotic because it had that shoulder tension relaxing as his fingers splayed out into the muscles. I whined into his mouth as he pinched at my nipples, the sound hitching up feeling his hip bone and wiry pubic hair finally press into mine. Even that had me twisting a bit, my clit on fire still from back-to-back orgasms.

I was thankful there was no more of his dick to add to the already impossibly small space inside of me. To his credit, Floyd was kind enough to let me adjust to his size for a few moments, content to just pet me and kiss at my mouth. But that was only for a moment before his hips drew back and slammed into mine with enough force my ass was skittering again against that damn fabric.

I pinched at his shoulder where my arm was looped and tugged on his hair in a way to reprimand him without having to break our kiss. Floyd seemed to have resigned himself to punishment because he wasn’t deterred from slamming back into me, angling so that he was going down rather than driving me against the grain of the table. I couldn’t stop the high keen as I threw my head back trying to catch my breath. It was one thing to be finger fucked into oblivion; it was something else to have the cock the size of the empire state building rearranging my insides to do it.

I was out of time for Floyd to go slow though, he was chasing his own release after giving me two, fucking into me at a speed I would never be able to sustain if I had been riding him. I was in awe between shoots of pleasure at how strong he was, that was the last of my brain power though because he dropped a hand between us to rub at my clit in quick circles and after so much play already, I was still hypersensitive.

“Jesus fucking christ Floyd!” I yelped disconnecting our mouths because what else was there to do? He had me caged in with his arms, his hand gripping my nipples and his cock pinning me in place. All I could do was sit there and take it as he rammed into me, still considerate enough to try and get another orgasm out of me. Or for all I knew this man just wanted to feel my pussy squeezing him. I was panting, my head resting against his forehead as I breathed in his air, the warm puffs between us striking me as oddly intimate, more so than the fact he had his cock deep inside of me.

Either way I was falling apart faster than I had the first time, I howled as my orgasm ripped through me, my back arching and another half-hearted squirt of my fluid coating his pants more. It couldn’t breathe and the pressure from clenching my jaw through that blindingly pleasure-painful orgasm had my ears popping. I didn’t even realize I had gripped Floyd’s shoulders and tore at him hard enough I popped the buttons of his uniform shirt.

I felt his cock inside of get harder, like it was shoving against the walls of my pussy before I felt the warmth. He growled again, the noise against my face sent me tightening around him in arousal and his eyes rolled, choking out a grunt at the sensation. I felt satisfied because I finally got a noise out of the man.

I was petting his hair and face trying to ground myself back to reality, peppering a few kisses along his cheeks in appreciation for the absolute wonderful dicking down service he provided. His smile as he came back to himself was blinding, bright in the way that had my insides melting.

But it wasn’t his smile that was blinding. It was the sun clawing at my eyelids as my alarm went off to wake my ass up to get ready to go sailing with Penny. She was teaching me the intricacies so that I could sail and get my own nearshore plankton samples just for fun. I groaned because I never though I would be angry to be woken up to go get plankton… but that dream of Floyd was still on my mind, his smile lighting my chest up.

“God damn it,” I mumbled rolling over to get up and get ready.

Chapter Text

Sun protection on these outings was always more important than being cute in my eyes. That meant a bucket hat, shades, a UV shirt, and thin UV swim tights. Covered from head to toe, no sunburns or skin cancer for me. It was hotter than walking out and going sailing in a bikini but I didn’t need surfer’s eye or worse like skin cancer.

I always was careful, growing up my mom was constantly getting skin cancer and having to get bits of her cut off I just decided I wasn’t going to play with that. Plus, burns, any shade you could burn and at any point in my life, no matter how hard I tried, if I wasn’t taking precautions I would burn and end up sick for a week after. I didn’t have time to take off and just mope around because my body was trying to recover from extensive UV damage, thankfully I had mentors who helped me learn more about keeping myself protected out on the water when I first started researcher. Not everyone took it seriously, I mean I wore crocs on cruises when I could get away with it, but for the most part I respected being able to have my own discretion in ways of taking care of myself.

After I got dressed, I was grabbing one of the meal replacement shakes I used on days I couldn’t find the will to get out of bed early enough to eat plus those little cardboard belvita biscuits to add some heft to my stomach so I didn’t feel so hungry. I glanced at my coffee pot noticing that the light was on but nothing had brewed and I winced… I forgot to fill the tank again. I rushed over to shut it off and prayed the $8 pot I picked up at Savers my freshman year of college would survive another dry run through because I had been too drunk last night to remember to fill the water.

That just left me with my shake and bar, something that didn’t sound as fun being it was so early but it would have to do. Breakfast of champions, I thought to myself as I snatched my keys to leave and tried to gag down the stale grains into my mouth. I kept a toothbrush in my center console and a spare bottle of water just for brushing my teeth when I got to my destination.

I could be organized for work and my research but my personal life was more of a disaster than any other part of my world. I was walking quickly, unlocking my little baby blue Toyota from the 90’s, a FJ60, a clunker but easy enough to fix when shit hit the fan. It was running on 400,000 miles and parts I had hodpodged from salvage yards but it still ran. My dad called it a cockroach car – joking I would be buried in it before I gave it up and moved on to something newer.

Really, who needed newer? I had a cassette collection I added when I could thrift finds (or if I really loved the album, I would take the time to rip it onto the cassette but that hadn’t happened since the last Atta Boy album drop), speakers that worked after I replaced them, AC, and heat. The car was big enough to camp in too with great off roading capabilities; I could throw a paddle board or a kayak on top, hell I could even tow my small trailer for field work if I absolutely needed to. It was honestly everything and anything I could want in a vehicle… except it couldn’t go mudding. That was a big no-no. The thing was heavy and I learned the hard way that the fucker sinks and fast. No four-wheel drive is going to get you ass out of mud when the car is chunky.

All in all, I loved her, named her Leah, and never looked back.

Leah was my first car, used from a family friend I bought the second I turned fourteen with 150,000 miles already on it but only for $1,100. It was love at first drive. Three accidents, six degrees in four states, and now my post doc in a fifth. Leah had really been there for me, sturdy, reliable… well mostly. Moreso now with the slow progression of learning the hard way how to fix a car myself and how to upkeep with maintenance.

By law this bitch could be considered a classic car at 35 years old.

Yeah, my dad was right, I would probably die in this car.

I started up the engine and reversed out of my spot so I could get over to Penny’s. I had a go pack for outings already stashed in my car, it was a mobile second home for me really which I was thankful for my foresight to plan for trips like this in advance knowing myself and my inability to drag myself out of bed at a reasonable time to prep day of any event. I popped the center console, grabbed the toothbrush that lived there, and at a light I put toothpaste on.

I regretted not tying my hair back before I had left, having my hair mess around my head like a less scary version of medusa with the windows down. At the stop sign I opened my door to spit out it and put the toothbrush on the dash to dry in the sun after rinsing it with my water bottle. Thankfully no one was ever up this fucking early if you didn’t have to be on the weekend so I had no horns raging at me for taking a moment at the stop sign. Deodorant came out next from the console and a hair tie, throwing my hair back in a knot so it would stay the hell out of my face.

AC/DC pounded through my speakers as I hit the freeway to get to Penny’s. We normally carpooled to the marina since it was past her house and there was no reason to take two vehicles. I never passed up the chance to be passenger princess either, I loved having Penny drive me around. I often joked that I was a long-lost daughter – something she would sometimes laugh at and other times give me a glare cutting enough to make me shiver.

She was only fifty, still incredibly young in my eyes. I never pointed out that she was my mom’s actual age unless she really said something to annoy me. I was just thankful she wanted to spend time with me and I really did try not to be a total shithead. I was rolling up to the light near her house, when an early 90’s white ford ranger pulled up beside me with a mismatched dark camper shell. I always gave a nod to the other clunkers I rolled up on. Living in a city populated by majority military who had disposable income out the ass (or in most cases, irresponsible losses of sign on bonuses) in comparison to me, my car always stood out in a crowd.

I tried to be proud I kept things running this long, but sometimes it got to me when I saw one of those pretty new 4Runners on the road – but no way in god’s green earth would I be spending a minimum of 45 grand on a vehicle. I could barely stomach dumping a couple hundred in to replace my speakers, much less thousands to upgrade. I just reminded myself I had no car payments and it would get me to point B in the same way as Leah and looked away.

So even now, I gave a nod to the older cars… which was not the move because a very familiar pilot was in the car next to me. Those pretty blue eyes from last night and in my dreams caught my little chin jerk and he gave me one of those tight-lipped smiles white people did when they felt awkward but still wanted to be friendly.

There I was, looking a fool at 5 am when the sun was rising, in front of my crush who had no idea who I was. Great, I thought to myself as the light turned and I immediately was looking away trying to hide in the seat of my car. Why the hell was he out? Didn’t he need sleep? “Well dumb ass, why the hell are you awake?” I muttered to myself in response to my thoughts.

I kept my eyes locked straight ahead as I made the last turn to Penny’s house, parking along the street and taking a breath seeing the cliff and out into the ocean. It was a really nice house, remnant from her parents when they passed and when home prices were actually affordable in California to some degree. Now? There was no way that this house was under a few million, she already had promised Amelia that the house was hers too when Penny passed. The kid wanted to go to a UC anyways so it would be close enough of a crash zone for her, I was unashamed in plugging my post doc school so I could try and get some of those legacy points to pass on – she might not be my kid but I sure as hell was going to try my damnedest to make it work that way since there was no chance in me procreating.

I parked at the end of the fake cul-de-sac turn around rather than in front of her single car garage where she parked so she had room to get out. It was nice not being so smashed in this area, she had a pretty good size gravel backyard unlike much of the area crammed into with a nice gazebo that she would host parties at. I took the backside entrance between the main house and the garage, glancing up to see the light off in her little loft her parents had converted when they had her younger brothers.

That admiral money was really nice for upgrading the house in my opinion. Even now it had character, and space. I could only image the property taxes though for San Pedro. It was better I was renting a small mother-in-law suite for the time being so I didn’t have to think about the ever-present looming bill for that. Before I could even knock before Theo was making a low ‘boof’ sound at me through the door.

“Theo, bud, I have been here a million times, can you not act like I’m a stranger, please? It wounds me you don’t see me as family,” I muttered knowing the damn dog could hear me through the door. I loved him but I always worried that Amelia would get woken up by the old man at the door.

“It’s unlocked!” Came a much louder Penny’s voice that overtook the low ‘boof’ from Theo. Guess Amelia was at a friend’s place again. There were multiple nights that the girl would spend the night out of the house now that she was getting older. I loved seeing her grow into herself, confidence wise and socially.

Without wasting a minute, I was pushing the door open to a panting Theo who seemed to work up a sweat just yelling that he could hear me through the door. The dog had to be at least six years old now, well into adulthood for a lab. I bent down to give obligatory pets, paying special attention behind his ears and under his collar. “See, you are just so mouthy without anything to back it up,” I cooed at the dog when I saw Penny out of the corner of my eye.

“Got coffee,” she said holding up my thermos. I grinned because that was the exact one, I had forgotten the last time we went sailing.

“Have I ever told you I love you?” I said touching my heart and giving her a grin as I was drawn away from the dog at the promise of caffeine.

“You were swaying last night, I figured you’d be more hungover,” she said laughing as I came closer and jutted her chin towards the stove where I saw that she had also made me a plate of food from her breakfast. Eggs, bacon, and toast all neatly set up so that they weren’t touching.

Something inside me cracked at that. My own parents… we weren’t close. Too much had happened when I was a kid and my mom had checked out emotionally from raising me and my dad had never learned to be open with his feelings. A classic example really, textbook for mommy and daddy issues, so unoriginal there were a million movies and shows written about children just like me.

And moments like this, when someone made me a plate of food because they were worried about my wellbeing or coffee since they had made a pot, left me trying to subtly itch at my chest because it was so meaningful. “Shit Penelope, you shouldn’t have,” I said trying to sound like myself, that same sarcastic kid, but that crack in my tone was enough to have her giving me that knowing smile that drove me crazy sometimes.

She was too smart for her own good. Too wise. She was older than me, lived more and saw more of the world so I tried to not feel ridiculous that she could read me so easy. “Let me guess, you had one of those shitty shakes you keep in the back of your car and a granola bar,” she said raising her brow at me and pointed to the plate in the way I’d seen her direct Amelia. There was no room for argument, she had her father’s ability to command a room.

I grabbed the plate, my hands shaking a little, as I moved to lean on the counter and gobble up the food. It wasn’t unusual for her to feed me; Penny always seemed to be the kind of person that cooked way too much and handed out food to save herself from leftovers. It just was that casual care, like her packing my thermos for me that I had forgotten, that had my throat closing around the toast.

“I had a breakfast bar thank you very much,” I said sticking my tongue out at her. It didn’t help that most of the time it was just a granola bar, I just bought those damn bricks in bulk at Costco and I was out of everything else.

“You mean the solid granola bars?” She teased as she rolled her eyes at me. I sighed because she was right, they were the exact same ingredients just packaged and cooked differently.

“Well, you and I both know I fucking hate mornings,” I said as I reached for my thermos before she ‘tsked’ at me and pointed to the coffee pot.

“Drink from that, the thermos is for when we’re out on the water,” and like it was natural I was getting into her cupboard to pull out a mug. I had done this dance a thousand times between hanging with Amelia to help her study to the parties Penny put on for her friends and even before our little sailing trips. “I know you hate mornings, probably even more since you didn’t bring that pilot, you’d been eyeing all night home,” she said bluntly.

I spun on my heel, my face bright red and my grip on the mug feeling less secure than before. “I wasn’t eyeing any one person, you know I like to people watch,” I said defensively. I had done it for a few years now, just coming in and watching. Sometimes I’d pick a random habit and count how many times someone did it – like a couple that did shots in time with every Elvis song someone played on the jukebox or sometimes I’d count the number of people with an article of clothing like fun socks. Hell, there were even times I would make fake conversations between people and relay them to Penny during lulls in orders. It was a pastime.

“You watched that geeky one all nights, not even a tick in that little notebook for something he did. You just looked. It’s rare for you to just be looking and not analyzing something,” she said putting her hands on her hips in that way only a mom could do during a lecture.

“Oh my god, was this my final meal before you kill me?” I groaned going for the coffee. I would definitely need caffeine to sustain myself through this conversation. Penny could smell blood.

Once again, she was too perceptive. It was like she was tuned in to me, a skill I hadn’t quite captured in the same capacity. Yeah, I could tell when she was having a bad day or Amelia’s dad had missed another phone check in but there was always more that she managed to gather from just a few seconds of watching. It was uncanny and made me feel too exposed some days. She was able to accurately tell when my mom’s birthday was because she said I was a walking rain cloud, rather than judge though she was always there with warmth. That first year she’d let me bring her flowers to the bar because I had just gotten off a cruise and was getting ready to crash, I knew that it was normally off limits because it would encourage other rowdy sailors that were trying to shmooze the beautiful bartender that she would be reciprocal to that attention. But she had left me a message that she’d be honored if I brought her flowers since I couldn’t give them to my mom.

The woman was like a human lie detector though at this point so any denial that I wasn’t eyeing Floyd all night were more proof that I was embarrassed being caught. “No, it was because I know you don’t eat real food enough,” she laughed at my little outburst, not bothered at all by my dramatics. “The questions still stand though, the boy. He’s a top gun graduate from a few years ago, I remember him from when he was just a bright-eyed guy fresh into his junior officer tour.”

There it was, the dangling lure. Penny had information and I was always weak for learning more. “Wait, so he went to Top Gun from the start right out of training?” I asked more out of shock than anything, normally they had at least the first 3 years under their belt before being shoved through the program. I knew that the Officer Candidate School is 13 weeks but for him to be a lieutenant this man had to have at least a Bachelor’s degree on top of his education already. Two years minimum for those gold wings. “When was this?” I asked Penny trying to mental math to figure out this guy’s age.

“He’s a few years older than you,” she said already grinning as she went for her own cup of coffee to sip. “He came through for the first time right when you got here actually, brief. I think he was getting ready to deploy for the first time if I remember right. He had actually came through and helped fix a couple of seals on the windows when I first bought the Hard Deck,” she offered helpfully.

So, Penny knew more about this man than just his name. “Sounds like a boy scout,” I groaned as I picked the food back up to shove my face so we could head out to sail. I tended to find the nice guys attractive but when push came to shove it didn’t work if they were too good. I needed a man who could push back and stand up to me or I would bulldoze them, boy scouts were too good boys as a general rule.

“He was a boy scout, why do you think he ended up in the military,” she joked. “Very polite, good manners, knows how to fix things. He had a whole talk about the years he lived with his mom in Wyoming and him having to learn young how to make minor repairs on their little sheep far, I grilled him pretty hard when he was doing the sealant because lord knows I needed wood rot to add to the list of fixes for that damn bar.” I felt like I should have a little pen and paper with how she was rattling off information to me. “The whole time he was very patient with me when I was rambling on and questioning his every move. When I had the yearly inspection, I was actually asked about who fixed some things Bob did, they were disappointed to learn he was long gone on some mission in Iraq by the time the paint dried.”

I gave her a weird look, “his name is Bob?” In that moment I knew I really had to be attracted to him because even a name like fucking Bob wasn’t turning me off completely.

“Robert legally,” she added with a sympathetic smile already seeing the displeasure scrunch up my face.

“Like the mother fucking tomato from veggie tales?” I groaned as I finished up my plate and turned to wash it in the sink.

“Pretty sure that’s how he got his callsign in all honesty, yeah it’s a shorter version of his name but you know how those nicknames are all inside jokes and that boy really screams altar boy,” and there was the joke. No matter what, Penny was always reminding me that even in a serious moment, she would be there with a joke.

“Good god, I’m fucking screwed Pen,” I mumbled as I stuck the plate in her dishwasher and grabbed her mug and mine to place in as well. “Even the unmoanable name Bob hasn’t icked me out bad enough to not find him cute still,” it put a damper on the mood for sure but it wasn’t enough to deter me completely.

Penny just laughed at me and threw her arm around my shoulder; she had a few inches on me but it was okay because that meant she was tucking me into her side and shaking me affectionately. “Since you didn’t even have the courage to talk to him after those drinks, I think you’re safe… that is until he comes over to help lay some of the stones for the garden tomorrow,” her voice had that conspiratorial tone that told me I was not going to like the next part.

“You’re shitting me Penny,” I groaned.

“Nope, turns out he had some time this morning to run to the store for me while we go out sailing and he’s coming over the same time you’re doing that little study group with Amelia!” Her grin told me that she had planned this perfectly, ensuring I couldn’t run or backout because there was no way that I was going to let her daughter or her friends down.

That was why he was awake this early, I thought to myself remembering the awkward stop light incident.

“You’re a fucking ass hole,” I huffed as I broke away to get into the car,

“I am a better fucking wingman than half the pilots in this town!” Her Subaru unlocked and I was throwing myself in the front seat with a huff. Her phone connected to the Bluetooth screen and read off that she had a message.

“Boy Scout Bob, new message,” the robotic lady’s voice chirped through the speakers. My frown only deepened as Penny hit the button to read the message. “Hi Ms. Benjamin, there was no issue like you said at the store to pickup the stones for the backyard. I have them in the back of my truck, covered, to lay tomorrow for you at ten am,” the robot read. Of course, he was polite and confirmed each step of the way.

“You planned this,” I grumbled shooting her the nastiest glare I could muster because somehow, she had cosmically aligned to dangle this man’s number in front of my face too in the form of a well written text message to Penny.

“Well last night when he was leaving, he offered his help again since we’d talked about it years ago when he was back in town and he wanted to get right on it before his mission starts,” it sounded perfectly innocent when she phrased it like that but something told me Penny had been less concerned about making a walking path in her backyard than meddling in my business.

I continued to frown at her, looking for the lie she knew I could never find anyways. I was shit at reading people and couldn’t discern those little tells even after all these years around her when she was trying to lie. The ride to the marina was quiet as I stewed because tomorrow there was going to be something akin to a playdate that this woman set up.

Chapter Text

The docks were busy; it was a weekend and early in the morning – prime time really for all sorts of boat enthusiasts to be rushing to launch to push a full day of sailing. I missed the days of lazy drifting with the little flat bottomed, aluminum Jon boat my grandpa had for duck hunting when I was a kid. There was never this sort of crowd or noise, even during the height of summers at our little concrete boat ramp up in the mountains where he liked to hunt, the most activity was maybe passing a park ranger with a nod when they came out to check permits. The ramp was always clear at any time of day when we went out or came in after a long day on the water, yes it was always early launch with him too (even more than Penny) because the man rose at four am religiously pretending to follow some sort of military schedule even if he had never served but being so young it was different.

I could nap in that boat, the water calm and the tiny tiller quiet in relative terms as we drifted up river to the hunting grounds. Sometimes with the dogs, always a lab because what other sort of hunting companion could you have in his eyes, so I had something to cuddle which was really great once the weather cooled down towards November when he would hunt. The world was quiet, the worst that would disturb me under the sun was rolling over if I got too hot since the Jon boat had no cover or if there were too many dragonflies landing on my legs. If I was really good and asked nicely, he’d let me set up my tiny fishing pole while he waited for mallards and wood ducks to appear. But only if I threaded my own hook and took responsibility for the fish I caught.

There was nothing casual like those lazy days with Penny and her boat, there was no laying out on a bed of life jackets and catch a nap in the soft afternoon sun. With Penny it was a lot of work and little play, that was until we made it out to sea and I could cast my plankton nets. Her boat was a 41-foot J/125 sailboat, meaning this boat was a beast and required a minimum of two people to sail successfully which limited my peace. It was pretty cool to have a designated area inside though to settle if the weather got bad or if we wanted to stay out for more than a quick little jaunt to sea. More than quick really, this boat flew past even the smaller ones without the engine, the wind if it was good could hit 8 knots which was fast for what I was used to. Not a racing boat by any means but I was thankful for that.

Today, like every other time we went out, Penny was leading me towards her mooring spot. My pre-packed bag in hand with my extra supplies including everything I would need to do a plankton tow. It was pretty heavy at this point, more than forty pounds between spare clothes, sunscreen, food, water, mini first aid, net, collection jars, and the other miscellaneous items that I had collected over time that came to rest in my bag. It never got lighter, the second I removed something from it was the second I needed it. I remembered the time I took my tabis out because I hadn’t used them in months and suddenly, I had one of my damn buoys float off course and get stuck along a rocky bank.

I just decided it was a jinx to remove anything and I would just have to lift weights to keep up.

The first step for any day out on the water with Penny was the pre-sail checklist. “Check the fuel would ya kid?” She called out as she went to check the fresh water and preserved food in case of problems out at sea. This boat had a 20-gallon fuel tank, more than enough that she only needed to refuel once or twice a season, but it was routine just in case we sprung a leak or god forbid someone siphoned off our diesel.

Next was making sure we had enough life jackets, throw rings, working fire extinguishers, first aid kits, sunscreen stocks, working flashlights, and all the rest of the safety gear for when something went wrong – because Penny always assumed something would go wrong. A check of the flairs and smoke launches to make sure they were in good condition plus the extras the coast guard required if they ever did a check, the bell and whistle since the boat was long, navigation lights, buckets in case we took on water, oars, the different anchors in case we were stopping somewhere new, and the tool kit in case we needed to make repairs on the water.

Moving on was the physical inspection, not just the supplies. There was checking extra rope, if our radio, GPS, and radar were in working order, the hull deck was clear and everything was secured. Penny was a very by the book sailor, something I appreciated because I always felt safe with her taking me out. She had a read out of the weather, a copy saved on her phone in case we couldn’t get service off shore. There was a check of the motor and batteries to ensure they were operational, the bilge check to make sure that it wasn’t wet or dirty, and that the wheel was unlocked.

I felt excited that Penny was pointing me to use the radio, I had been practicing my hailing. Our marina didn’t use channel thirteen but instead its own working frequency on two to inform about launch and enters since it was a high traffic area. It kept the rest of the channels open for communication and cut out the original hail on channel 16. I went to the radio and turned it until I heard static, moving one notch up so that it would help filter the weaker signals before I pressed down on the transmitter button a few inches from my face so I wasn’t garbled on the radio. “San Pedro Marina… San Pedro Marina… San Pedro Marina… This is Rufless… on figures 02… over.”

It took less than a minute after I took my finger off the call button for the radio to crackle to life with a man’s voice, “San Pedro Marina go ahead, over.”

“Rufless here, this is a 41-foot sailboat checking traffic conditions for launch from mooring spot figure 24, over,” I repeated clearly really focusing on annunciation. Penny shot me a look, analyzing my call in of course. It was her vessel I was representing on the marina’s airways. 

“San Pedro Marina to Rufless, you are affirmative for launch, no traffic on the north end, over,” buzzed that same man.

“Rufless here, wilco, launching, out,” I was grinning as I heard the radio beep as a confirmation from the marina that they had gotten our launch. I grinned at Penny who gave me a thumbs up as she finished removing our mooring lines. I flipped to channel 16 immediately after confirming our launch and we were ready to go.

I felt my heart rate increase as we moved off from the dock, setting out to do our sailing with Penny at the helm. The sun was barely cresting in the sky, it was still nice and cool as we moved towards the open sea, “Stay on the starboard side, keep an eye out as I back us out. Watch for traffic,” Yelled Penny as she used the small engine to get us going at a more controlled pace inside the marina, the hum a backdrop against her voice.

I gave a quick nod and moved into position, gripping the rail, the stanchion she had called it, for balance. I was grateful that she was always so clear with her directions while we sailed, even if I stumbled or forgot one of her technical jargon things she would talk me through it. She had a little “P” and “S” sticker still on the sides of her boat cabin from where I had put them when we had first started sailing because I couldn’t remember which was which while she was directing me from the wheel. The other problem was trying to figure out the damn degrees for the wind, thankfully Penny would correct until I hit the angle she was looking for.

Penny nudged the throttle into reverse to get us out of our parking spot, the propeller churning softly beneath the stern leaving the boat vibrating, something I wasn’t sure if it was from the water or the motor. The rudder resisted the turn, the waves not choppy but still turning such a large boat would end up with some force to get it on track before it caught the motion. Slowly, deliberately, the boat began easing backward out of its spot, clearing the narrow space between neighboring hulls.

The wheel turned under his hand, angled slightly to starboard to swing the bow to port so that the fiberglass hulls wouldn’t knock together. We didn’t have our dock bumpers out; she had shown me how to walk with them when coming in but I always worried about crashing going out too. Thankfully Penny knew what she was doing, we glided past the other boats that sat in their own spots, mooring lines taught to keep them from swaying too far from the dock in high waves. People waved from their boats as we moved out, Penny always polite raising her hand in greeting as we passed.

“Okie doke kid,” she called out, easing into neutral again once we were clear of the other boats, “now forward.”

The engine tone changed, a more stuttered churn that left us rocking a bit as the boat nudged ahead. The marina channel opened a straight lane of calm water flanked by ship’s slips, pilings, and water breaking rocks at the mouth of the marina to keep the waters inside calmer. Beyond that, the heave of the open ocean waved at us with a promise of a decent day of sailing.

“Go up to the mast,” Penny instructed, steady as ever. “You need to get ready to raise the mainsail but you need to wait to haul on the halyard until I tell you.” I winced at the memory, my overeager first time sailing I had grabbed at the rope to get ready to raise the mainsail and accidentally untied the rope, whipping the sheet open too quick at the wrong angle which sent us shoving towards the break rocks. Thankfully Penny had been ready, but it was still a lighter touch this time in case, I tried to learn as much as I could while I was out on the water including how my fuckups could be prevented again.

I moved from my little vantage point clinging to the rails to climb to the base of the mast, clutching the halyard and used the winch drum for leverage rather than just trusting my brute strength like the first time. Penny threw me a thumbs up, still even years later of sailing together I could tell she was proud of me for not killing us. With that Penny turned the boat into the wind, the bow facing directly seaward as the channel widened with the engine in idle. Without the rocks and other boats to break up the wind, it dropped like ten degrees and I was no longer sweating my ass off in my long sleeve sun shirt.

“Now!” she called. “Raise it!”

I pulled hard, hand-over-hand to make sure I didn’t catch my hands again and yank them out of the sockets (once again a learning moment when the wind caught and almost took me with the sail while I tried to open it), the sail climbing with a wave before it snaped loudly as it caught the wind. That first snap always made me wince, loud like a crack of a whip and just as powerful as I used the winch drum again to keep me from flying away with the sail. Penny watched the boom rise, trimming the helm slightly to keep the wind dead ahead keeping us on track with the right of way on the starboard side.

“Keep going kid, watch for the battens catching!” She called. The battens, that she had to keep parallel to the direction of the wind to keep its shape. I watched the fabric and wasn’t seeing any sort of abnormalities but I was hoping that Penny would really yell if there was a problem my untrained eye couldn’t catch.

The sail jumped a few times which had me furrowing my brows but ultimately it filled and swung the boom a bit as it did. I tried to move fast before the boom swung out of position. I tightened the line on the winch to create more tension.

“Lock it!” Penny shouted. So, it had been getting ready to flop around like a dead fish, I thought to myself grinning at the fact I was able to anticipate that. Locking was always one of the harder tasks keeping the tension on the line, my shoulders burned slightly from the wind fighting me but I still was grinning like a fool.

“Get the jib out,” Penny yelled over the wind and the noise of the sail catching. I scooted a bit to open up the front sail, the bow. I knew I needed to hold on, the jib always made us zoom and I had to be sure that I was holding on to something when it did, still scared even to this day of going overboard. I tugged the furling line, it sliding through and the jib made that same snapping sound that had me on edge until it caught fully. And like that the hum of the engine was gone as Penny killed it, no longer needing the extra boost.

The boat surged jumped forward under sail alone, slicing cleanly through the marina mouth. Penny had me adjust the jib a few degrees to catch a bit more of the wind, her eyes watching for the directionality. “Boom to starboard 25 degrees,” she instructed again, my own approximation wasn’t quite what she wanted so she waved her hand until I was on target. “Straighten the clew, I don’t want luffing,” she added as I reached for the ropes to adjust.

I relaxed a bit more once we were on the open ocean, now it was minor adjustments with Penny’s direction to get us out to where we needed to be. She preferred to sail along the coast, she never took us more than three miles out on days like this, a short jaunt really. If we were going further, she was prepping harder than what we did today. Extra food, water, and diesel storages. Technically her boat could go longer distances but she tended to not push it with me still being so green on the water sailing.

I had the GPS on, guiding us to my routine sample locations. Penny, ever the patient woman, let me hit all ten of them to do casts off the stern, dragging the net at five knots for fifteen minutes gave me roughly a 1.25 nautical mile drag for each point. Every time I was pulling out glass containers to dump my sweet little plankton into, finding that the plastic tended to make any Synechococcus and Prochlorococcus unhappy.

I had filtered, sterile seawater to hold my precious hauls until we got back to shore. I kept them in the cabin, out of the direct sun so they didn’t bake while we finished out the day sailing. Something about being on the ocean always left Penny and I in higher spirits. It was heading into summer so we caught sight of a small pod of dolphins and even sea lions rushing through a school of fish. I was having a great time, using my small camera to capture what I could, including goofy pictures of Penny at the wheel.

She’d had me grab snacks, both of us forgoing stopping to eat a full meal while we sailed. The conditions were perfect and we didn’t want to waste time cruising up and down the coast, it wasn’t until the sun was low on the horizon that she had us pulling back in to dock, the inverse of the process getting out. Radioing in our arrival, tucking the sails in, tying them down, and her navigating with me holding the bumpers to get into our spot.

She had me tie off the boat, while she went through covering and closing off what was needed. By the time my feet hit the pavement and I was drug down by my bag filled with samples, I was crawling. It was well over twelve hours of being awake and moving, somehow these outings took more out of me than a cruise.

I was setting my shit in the back of her car, making sure my carefully labeled jars of plankton were labeled and out of the sun. Penny started the car and I sat in the passenger seat, eyes barely open. She was buzzing, somehow Penny was the kind of woman that got more energy the older she got rather than burning out.

“I know you have a strict schedule with those critters or I’d make you get dinner with me,” Penny said shooting me a smile as I slouched.

“Yeah, they tend to start dying pretty quick,” I muttered. “If you wanted you could come over to my place and take a little look at them,” I offered shooting her a grin knowing full well Penny didn’t care much for them. She entertained me while I chattered on but outside of that and sitting through some pictures, she couldn’t care less about my plankton. She took me out to give me company and out of the kindness of her own heart.

“As inviting as that sounds, I have a… meeting,” she finished quickly not daring to cast me a look.

My brow quirked and suddenly the exhaustion was draining off of me, I could smell blood this time. “Dinner… meeting? Who’s the guy?” I asked already invested.

“C’mon, I just said dinner because it’s late,” she said defensively.

“No, you were going to try and heard me into something so you didn’t have to call it a date to Amelia,” I said bluntly. It was rare that Penny even gave someone a second look, she was a woman focused on her family and her bar. Something I admired because she knew where her priorities were. “Was it that old guy from the bar?” I asked trying to remember what she called him.

Penny gasped and smacked me with her free hand not on the wheel. “He’s only four years older than me!” She said shooting me a nasty glare.

“I never said you were old; you look like you aren’t a day over 45,” I said smacking her back softly on her leg. “I swear it’s like fucking witchcraft, I’ve been half expecting you to hit me over the head and drain my blood for some sort of youth spell since you started hanging out with me,” I snickered. “What was his name… Paul… Patrick… Pete! Pete like the moss!” I said finally piecing together the fragments from the previous night. I had only been half paying attention, more caught up in Bob than anyone else that night.

Penny grimaced as I guessed his name. “Oh my god, Pete and Penny, you guys have matching names!” I cooed making a kissy face at her as I laughed at the thought. “He knew you, you let him flirt, so tell me about Pete,” I said leaning on the center console to gaze at her.

“You want to play this game? Because I have Bob’s number and the ability to text him right now to meddle,” she threatened glancing at me with another grin. “Hell, I know his friends he was with too, just try me,” she warned with a threatening undertone. 

That was the problem knowing the bartender, she knew everyone else too. “What do you mean you know his friends?” I asked narrowing my eyes at her, no longer feeling like I had the upper hand. I remembered some of the people I had seen with Bob, that cocky asshole, crisp cut man, the aloha shirt guy, the gorgeous woman, her pretty boy friend, and the mustache guy all were around Bob that night. No one besides that pretty woman paid attention to him, but that cocky asshole had come up and ordered beers after he noticed for the group.

“I’m a bartender in a military town, I see some of these guys all the time during a deployment and they rotate through often. Plus, some of them are legacy kids so I know them and their family, take Bradley for example,” she pointed out like I was supposed to know who the hell that was.

“I need more to go on than a name, I don’t talk to these people Pen, I observe,” I reminded her.

“The cute one with the goofy shirts and mustache,” she said like it was obvious.

“Aloha shirt guy, got it,” I muttered trying to tack on his name to the description so that if god forbid, I ever ran into him, I wouldn’t call him Aloha Shirt Guy.

“Exactly, him and Bob were in that group by the pool table,” she tapped her temple with a smirk. “I know many people, you would be wise to remember that,” she warned.

I groaned and flipped her off, “I just was asking about Pete, I wanted to know what the story was with that guy,” I huffed at her.

“You can pry when you stop being such a chickenshit,” she countered. It was true, I was often times hugging the wall because being around people in large social situations was stressful. I never quite knew how to act or what to say, worried it would be the wrong thing. It was easier when there were reasons for interacting, say a symposium or convention. Having a reason to gather with similar interests always made for easier conversation. You could ask about someone’s research and have a three-hour long conversation.

Outside of that? I was useless, I really struggled out in the wild and not in the confines of academia. It was a miracle that Penny even kept me around, she had been the one to adopt me though it felt like. Seeing a lost kid all alone in a new city, she could smell the loneliness on me and alcohol always made it easier to forget to think through all possible conversation combinations to try and socialize like a normal human.

I considered for a moment, especially with the looming prospect of tomorrow where she would be throwing Bob and I together like a puppeteer. I knew that I couldn’t get out of it and it helped that I would be there for the specific reason of helping Amelia’s friends with their biology final study session and proofreading their reports, but it wouldn’t completely keep me out of the line of fire because Bob would be there and I would be sober… with Penny running her wingman interference.

“If I talk to Bob, will you tell me about Pete?” I bargained looking at her side profile while she drove.

“You need to get his number yourself, and then I’ll answer any questions you want about Pete,” Penny challenged. Now that was a bet, I couldn’t resist that sort of information. I already had to pry pretty hard to get anything about her ex-husband, most of it was from Amelia who loved to snitch on her mom. I was naturally curious and I hated that Penny knew exactly how to work me.

“You’re on,” I said after a moment of weighing my options. I could do this; he worked on base. I could work it in like a professional connection.

I just prayed I could pull it off as a bold faced lie.

Chapter Text

At home I spent more than a few hours sorting through my plankton, painstakingly size fraction sorting before slipping random slides under the microscope to watch what I could see. The background music for the night was a heavy dose of Shinedown and Rob Zombie to add to the ambiance of my little home lab set up. I had spent a good chunk of my graduation money on it actually; a used fluorescence microscope the school was getting rid of with high magnification an attached camera that recorded the process of me sorting and whatever came up on the screen when I wanted to add to my darkfield microscope and light microscope – it was the most expensive equipment in retrospect that I owned. It made for gorgeous videos, especially when I threw on filters looking for chitin and chlorophyl depending on if it was zooplankton or phytoplankton predominantly.

Lots of chain diatoms, in their little boxy skeletons known as frustules made of silicon dioxide, my professors had always akin it to living in glass houses that encased a bunch of organelles. Glass plants since they photosynthesize, although the silica they make is more closely related to the structure of silica in opals. Thousands of species existed all over the world, being the most abundant type of phytoplankton, not just in our salty oceans but the freshwater streams. With the pennate diatoms that formed chains, ones that looked like twigs stuck together I found Pseudo-nitzschia which was not the greatest to be seeing since it caused harmful algae blooms when the waters were high in nutrient levels, making some of the filter feeding species toxic for people to eat. I made a note to reference the historical data to see if this was unusually high or not.

I grinned parsing through and finding Lingulodinium polyedrum, the pretty dinoflagellates that had their little tails that wrapped around their center used to move. I loved to watch them do their blue fluorescence when excited, of course they bleached after too much stress but I still loved watching them vibrate in the water and dance with their flagella beating. Their armor was different than the diatoms, cellulose rather than silica, and they made some pretty cool proteins and lipids, more than diatoms too since they store energy as starches and oils.

I found tons of copepods; the same kind of creature Plankton is in Spongebob with their long antenna and tiny little legs. Mostly the calanoid copepods, they are often at least 50% of the zooplankton that I find in my samples. They were easier to identify because they glide and only swim in short bursts rather than cyclopoids which bounce around like jerky bullets. If I was having too much trouble getting my copepods to slow down so I could look at them, I had learned that throwing in some sprite to the water would chill them out. It was the weirdest advice I had ever been given, pouring a sugary soda into my sample but it worked. I figured it had to do the pH of the water changing because later one of my collaborators had recommended baking soda if I was out of sprite for the same effect.

Of course, larval fish, jellies, worms, squid, crustaceans, and mollusks were in my samples mixed into the larger size fractions. They made for the coolest pictures, everyone loved seeing the baby animals. The smaller it got the more I found bacteria, protozoa, archaea, and even fungi – mostly yeasts. I really enjoyed culturing marine yeasts because I could get fun colors like purple, blue, and orange when I isolated them. Boring under the scope without stains but in a petri dish and the appropriate nutrient broth would give me such vibrant colors that had me wanting to frame them and fill them with glutaraldehyde to preserve the pigment – too bad the glutaraldehyde is photosensitive or I’d have better results.

When my eyes eventually started to burn and I ran through most of my samples, I knew it was time to call it quits. I checked the time and winced, it was well past three am and I had to be up, functional, and ready to roll at Penny’s place by nine. Once again, my own time management skills behind the microscope failed me. I had missed my alarms to stretch out my neck and to go the fuck to sleep so I had enough energy for the next day. I groaned, looking at the multiple dishes I could still sort through and sighed because I was just one person.

This was supposed to be fun, not another project, I reminded myself as I tossed the critters into my compost bin. I was always chasing another project, keeping myself busy with all of my curiosity and ended up taking on too many things all at once. It was definitely something I was trying to learn to manage so I wasn’t hurling rapid speed towards burnout. I had no reason to try and isolate some of the bacteria or yeasts this time around, well really, I had no time to focus on that with my impending doom of trying to weasel Bob’s number out of him a bit later. I needed more time and energy; it took hours to prepare fresh media and then all the time it took to streak correctly for isolation to get those pretty colony colors.

I crawled to the shower, no longer being hunched over my microscope meant that the day was weighing me down in my bones. The lack of focus on other things meant that I could feel my pains and aches from missing my stretching plus the wear from the workout from the boat trip. It was full body workout with a day of sailing and the exhaustion from the sun baking me. I hadn’t really had time to recover either from the drinking, not my brightest idea but also not the worst I’d done to my poor body.

A quick wash and a crash in bed was all that I had in terms of sleep preparation for the following day. It felt like less than fifteen minutes before my alarm was screeching to wake me up, in reality it was like five hours but still not enough after such a long day in the sun. Waking up, I slammed another meal replacement shake and a belvita bar while I was tugging on a pair of shorts and old tank top. I would be inside, no need for the extra layers of sun protection, especially with how hot it would get during the day.

I gave myself less time to get ready for today than I did normally because I had plans to make a quick stop after, and I wasn’t a fan of being late – especially not with this sort of thing. I liked the girls, it felt nice to have a purpose and to feel like a part of something. So that meant dragging myself through the morning hoping that caffeine would be enough to perk me up.

I text the group chat with Penny, the children, and their parents that I was on my way and stopping for brain food. That was my code for a run to Dunkin’ for doughnuts and shitty coffee, because what screamed study session like sugar and caffeine? Suddenly my inbox was flooded outside the group chat with begging and bribery for special orders, routine as well. I had a small spreadsheet on my phone for the girls and their orders, recurring members in the study group got added because it made it easier on these days for me to run in with alternatives in case the store was out.

I got a private text from Penny which made my cheeks burn.

Pen Pal: Should’ve gotten Bob’s number Friday so you could get him a special order. Want me to ask him for you?

Me: I wouldn’t get to learn all about you and Pete if I had gotten it Friday <3 Get me his order, yours is the same?

Pen Pal: Always

I had a standing call in for a warning about the boxed coffee to my neighboring shop and a few base doughnuts because the girls were predictable. It took another six minutes to respond to people, letting them know I saw their text as I waited in my car. I saw a popup from Penny, a screenshot of a text thread with Penny and Bob saying that he wouldn’t want to impose. I rolled my eyes at the fact the man wouldn’t just pick a damn drink.

I wondered if he even drank coffee, and for a moment I considered asking Penny for his number so I could call him. Rather than losing out on the chance learning about the mystery man at the bar, I decided to add it to the list of things I would grill Bob on later. A pit stop at my closest Dunkin’ and I was loading up my hazelnut latte and Penny’s lavender oat milk drink, the two large boxes of warm coffee, disposable cups, cream, sugar and its alternatives, stir sticks, and a dozen and a half doughnuts. There were only nine girls this time around but I wanted spares just in case someone was feeling a bit peckish.

Some of the parents were kind enough to chip in which left my chest warm, it was like $70 a month but I liked doing it for the girls. They were good kids and it made me feel more involved; I didn’t get the chance to do the aunt thing with my family because of the differing morals so being able to do it at all was a privilege. I rolled out with my treats in hand, ready to arm the youth of America to learn.

When I pulled up, I immediately was drooling because Bob was there, sweaty and hauling a large stone for the path for Penny from the back of his truck. My eyes raked over him, frozen in my car as I ogled the fine man. Bob glanced up and made eye contact with me, tilting his head and a flash of recognition went across his face. I felt my cheeks heat and I was scrambling to try and busy myself to hide the fact I had been drooling over him just the moment before. I prayed that he didn’t think I was some freak stalking him, I had just seen him at the light the other day and now I was here. What if Penny hadn’t told him I was coming?

I saw the front door open and Amelia and Theo come bounding out to see me, all grins. “You brought treats!” She squealed like it was a surprise I came with provisions. Theo making low barking sound at Amelia’s excitement, it made me smile seeing the both of them, a pair.

“Babes, we’ve been doing this for how long? Do I ever neglect the girls?” I said laughing as I threw open my car door to unlock it so she could help carry in the coffee. I had a drink container for Penny and I’s drink, the two big coffee containers, and the doughnuts so it would be quite the juggling act.

“It was dragging on though without you,” Amelia said grinning as I handed off one of the drink carrier to her to deliver her mom’s drink for me before turning around to grab the big coffees and the doughnuts myself. I had my back turned when a low voice, twinged with the faintest drawl that I had never heard came from behind me.

“Lemme help with those, don’t want ya to spill,” said the male voice. I felt sweat gather at the back of my neck and my palms. I tried to not jump at the new voice, to show that he startled me. I hadn’t expected Bob to stop hauling rocks and come over like a hero to take care of my lifting too.

“I uh… it’s okay, really, just doughnuts and the coffee,” I said glancing over seeing those pretty blue eyes from the bar that made my insides turn to goo. Instinctively I was ready to wave him off, to do it myself rather than rely on anyone else.

“Yeah, but you still gotta lock your car and get the door,” he said holding his hand out with a brow raised. A pushy white knight, I thought shooting him a narrowed glance. “You don’t seem the type to ask for help,” he said before he snatched the heavy jugs out of my car with a small smile before I could even react.

“Hey! That’s not very nice of you,” I growled reaching for the jugs back but he moved faster than I could chase after him, just out of my reach.

“I think it’s very nice of me to take the heavy objects to the house,” he said as he walked away with both of the big coffee jugs in hand like it was nothing. Really it was, they were only a couple of gallons but still, the principle of it all was the point.

I was left there with the light pastry box and a bewildered look. I caught Penny looking out the kitchen window, eyes locked on me with a smirk. She had to have orchestrated that; I slammed my car door not bothering to lock it as I walked to the door… to find it opened for me. My eyes shot open, I almost stumbled once again because there Bob was with a small smile and the door open from the inside for me.

“I thought that you took the fucking coffee so I could open the door,” I blurted sounding a bit meaner than I had intended because I was so caught off guard seeing him there and holding the door for me like I was some sort of lady. I had never been good at flirting and I sure as hell had never handled someone taking care of things for me – especially a man – without a fight. Penny and few others were an exception that a little bit of care I could tolerate without complaint, but that was after years of friendship and her shrugging off any protest I had.

That smile didn’t falter on his face though, still polite with those kind eyes, “you moved too slow, I beat you to the door too,” he said and it sounded almost like a joke – teasing.

I had to brush past him in order to get into the house and he didn’t seem like he was going to move. “Don’t mind her, always more bark than bite,” Penny said peaking around the corner to wave me in. “Come on, you’re going to make the girls wait for sweets longer?” She chided knowing damn well I had no other option. I tried to take a deep breath before I was stepping forward.

My face felt hot as my body moved against him, my right side feeling the hard planes of his chest as I tried to squeeze past him as best I could with as little contact. Why the fuck was this man so built, I thought to myself. He seemed nerdy, and yet he was hauling massive river rocks to pave a walkway like it was nothing. I just hadn’t connected those dots until I got the flash of the muscles hidden under that shirt.

My name was cheered as I walked into the kitchen seeing the table laid out with nine sets of study materials and sets of eyes looking at me like a savior. “I have brought treats!” I said holding the box up like a trophy trying to ignore the lingering tingle from touching Bob.

Cheers rang out through the house as the door swung shut behind me, only the warmth never left meaning that Bob was lingering in the house. Trying to sound nicer than I did with the last comment I looked over my shoulder at him, finding him incredibly close to the point one step backwards and I’d be in his arms. “I uh… got you a glaze too,” I couldn’t meet his eyes, rather I turned back around to walk towards the table to hand out treats to the girls.

Like a pack of hungry wolves, the children descended on the coffee and sugar, I found myself grabbing one of the glazed ones with a napkin for Bob. I was prepared to walk back over to the door but there he was, hovering close by like I had summoned him too with the promise of sugar. I extended the doughnut, “wasn’t sure if you liked these, Penny said you didn’t want anything but I wasn’t going to let you be left out,”

His hand was gentle as he took the pastry from me, fingers brushing against mine that had my breath stuttering. He had that same small smile, but this time I could see his dimple as he looked back up at me. “She had text me to mention you wanted to know my order. I distinctly remember saying I didn’t need anything,” that dimple was distracting, too fucking cute on his face – especially when it was directed at me.

“Well, you’re outside working for Penny, I think feeding you isn’t that insane,” I countered with my brow raised in a challenge.

“How’d you know I like the classics?” He asked instead of responding, bringing the sweet treat up to his mouth, opening it in a way that had me flashing back to my sinful dream just a few nights ago with his mouth on me.

“I uh… well the glaze, sour cream, and the French cruller ones are my go to’s always. I don’t like the extra frill on my treats,” I reached for my own sour cream I had picked up for myself.

“Never thought to branch out,” he muttered as he chewed on his bite. Without thinking I held my doughnut out for him, I had less than half a second to process what I was doing when his eyes shifted from me to the sweet, I was holding out for him.

I felt my heart rate increase because he leaned forward to take a bite off of the doughnut wordlessly, taking a small bite off of it. “Woah, yeah, that is pretty good,” he said glancing back up at me. His mouth was so close to my hand and once again, I was picturing it on my neck and between my legs.

I swallowed hard and nodded, “I uh, yeah, really good. If you… here,” I said holding it back out at him because I wasn’t sure I could focus on eating the treat with him so close.

Bob shook his head, his hand moving to gently hold my wrist to push my treat back to me, “No, I can’t have the one you bought for yourself.” His hand lingered on my wrist, eyes trying to meet mine and I completely forgot I had come here to teach a room full of girls about the wonders of biology. Rather I was considered grabbing the man in front of me and dragging him to my car by his shirt to see what was under that layer and explore what other sweet things he’d let near his mouth.

“Damn it Bob, can you please just take the pastry,” I said with a small glare being denied.

His head cocked to the side, looking me over with a new curious gaze, “did Penny tell you, my name?” I froze, because I hadn’t really asked him for his name. It was plausible and technically true that Penny had given me his name.

There was a drawn-out moment of quiet before Penny was stepping in to help. “Of course, couldn’t let her wander in thinking there was a strange man at my house,” she said leaning in and putting her hand on my side. It was enough to jump start my brain so I wasn’t standing there like an idiot just gawking at him like I had been caught doing something I wasn’t supposed to. “How do you think she knew to bring provisions?” She added saving me that embarrassment too, taking the heat for the decision to bring him treats too.

She tapped my arm, a signal to tuck it back from Bob’s face. “Ah, that makes sense,” he hummed looking at me still trying to analyze the situation while he took another bite of his treat.

“Coffee too,” I added, once again my mouth working before my brain could process it.

Bob gave another smile, that damn dimple right there. “You’re a very nice hostess,” he said looking at me before his eyes flickered to Penny too like a last-minute reminder. “Both of you,” he added.

“Penny did you feed him too?” I asked laughing and looked at her where she stood at my side.

“I promise you’re still special,” she cooed playfully at me and jutted her chin over the stove where there was a covered plate. She had left me some breakfast too, always looking out for me in a way that made me feel like a part of a family.

“Okay, food then fun,” I said remembering the rest of our little family, Amelia and her friends. I glanced back over at them, they were gathered around chatting and giggling while they ate their doughnuts and sipped coffee, oblivious it felt like to the fact I was having a moment with Bob. “You girls are going to have such a great time, it’s all about bacteria this time and I love nothing more than our little friends!” I said moving from Penny to the stove to shove my face before our little study group could commence.

It was a few hours of me having to sit with my back to the window when I realized I couldn’t focus to teach when I had sight of Bob in the backyard, hauling the rocks and leveling the ground in the process for Penny and her pathway. Drooling over a man like a teenage girl around other teenage girls that I was nervous could tell what I was doing. It felt like time drug on; I would’ve dipped after lunch like normal to get home to do some cleaning but Penny had mentioned that she was having Bob over for dinner as an extra perk for doing so good in the backyard.

By four the girls had lost interest in biology and they drifted out back chattering about something or another and laughing, leaving me inside alone where there was nothing that I could pretend to be watching besides Bob. I was leaned on the counter, trying to be subtle as I took my perch up to observe privately. He had laid a path all the way from the back driveway, to the back door, unattached garage, and was working his way to the gazebo. So many of those heavy ass stones I got to enjoy the sight as his forearms flexed.

I giggled a little to myself, the memory of a childhood TV show flashed in my mind, “Bob the Builder” which had me picturing Bob plastered in flannel and wielding a hammer. Yet another thing to make me swoon when I really should’ve been focusing elsewhere. There was something about a man being capable and sweaty that just did it for me.

I was unashamed in my drooling at this point. His glasses were perched on his nose, sweat on his brow sticking his hair in little curls against his scalp, and fuck was it delicious to see a man at work. He had one of those logo shirts, bright yellow that somehow complimented that tan he had going on as the sleeve dug into his skin every time, he lifted one of the stones. Basketball shorts hung off his hips, never falling, no, that would be too easy for me to catch a little peak at him like that. But swaying enough to allude to it.

“You know hiding in the house isn’t the way to get a man’s attention,” came Penny’s voice from behind me. I jumped and knocked over my coffee cup spilling the precious bean water over her countertop.

“Holy fucking hell Penelope!” I screamed as I moved to try and mop up the mess.

“Wouldn’t have jumped if you weren’t doing that peeping thing,” she said laughing seeing me fumble around in a tizzy.

“Or if you weren’t trying to scare me!” I snapped back looking at her like she was insane.

“I called your name more than once kid, you were just too focused on drooling over the help,” she said laughing and moving to help clean up my mess.

She was right of course; I hadn’t heard her come in. I was watching the sweat rivulets run down his forehead and those taught neck muscles. “It wasn’t like that,” I groaned unable to look at her. She was completely right but that didn’t mean I wanted to tell her that. She’d already watched it once; I didn’t need her catching me doing it again.

“You and I both know you have a staring problem,” she said shaking her head at me as she tossed the paper towels into the trash.

“I was just lost in thought,” I muttered rinsing my cup to put back in the dishwasher.

“Thoughts about fucking the help,” she said laughing at my almost pout.

“Penelope!” I gasped turning to look at her, with that shit eating grin.

“You’re going to tell me I’m wrong?” She asked putting a hand on her hip and raising her brow at me in the way a mom would when she was confronting her misbehaving child.

“Yes!” Which was a total lie and that eyebrow cock was enough to tell me that she didn’t buy it for a second.

“Sure, time to face the music though, help me get the shit out to the grill. I’m going to make burgers and hotdogs,” she said pointing to the fridge for me to start pulling out supplies.

Rather than argue with her I turned to grab things. The meat, cheeses, and veggies while she grabbed the bread and the cooking tools. I followed her outside, keeping my head tucked low because I knew I couldn’t be trusted not to get stuck watching Bob so blatantly. It was like any other one of the get togethers with the girls, the end of the school year approaching meant more work though and the transition with high school all the more strenuous so it made sense Penny would have a bit more flair with the barbeque. Although, that woman never did anything half assed in her life.

I was able to set everything down on the table next to the grill under Penny’s direction, turning to run inside and running directly into Bob who had been hovering like a shadow. “Fuck,” I muttered jumping feeling his hands land on my arms to keep me steady.

“You, okay?” He said softly like he was really concerned I’d fall over and faint from just a little spook.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah,” I mumbled trying to step back and only tripping on the concrete ledge of the gazebo and falling backwards, “fucking hell!” I yelped as I went down, resulting in Bob needing to grip me again to keep me from landing on my ass. This time, I did need a bit of help, unlike the first spook which was even more frustrating because I was really getting annoyed with this whole save me bit, he was doing.

“You’re jumpy,” he said laughing a little as he held my arms, supporting a chunk of my weight. I stood there, frozen, as he stood there smiling at me. That damn dimple making an appearance once again to stun my brain. His hands were warm, they had callouses around his fingertips and on the edge of his palms, like a man that worked with his hands. I tilted my head, glancing at the warm skin on mine, confused because I was pretty sure that pilots didn’t have super rough working conditions inside the plane to make them chafe like that.

I was too distracted, letting him linger for longer than I thought possible or proper when I felt his fingers flex against my upper arm. I almost regretted the tank top because now I knew what his hands felt like and I was quickly wanting them to trail further than just the polite position on my arm.

“You’re hovering!” I huffed indignantly as I shot him a glare to cover up how flustered his touch made me. I tried to tug myself back away from him no matter how badly I wanted to crawl into his arms, it was an irrational want that I knew would be far too forward and insane to let happen. I was not that kind of woman, that just folded for a random man because he was a little sweet.

“Seems it was a good thing I did too or you might have broke your tailbone,” he quipped back seemingly unperturbed by my attitude. This man was too nice, too sweet, it was like he was built to counter every one of my complaints to disarm me.

This time I slid his hands off my arms as I stepped back, without stumbling and falling. “I don’t need you to act like an epiphyte,” I said lowly shooting him another dirty look.

“A what?” He said stooping a little to look me in my eyes. This man was big on the eye contact it seemed, those metal wire glasses framed his eyes like homing beacons.

“A… ya know, an epiphyte,” I repeated but that confused look never left his face. “Like, a plant that grows on another one but it’s not parasitic… a bromeliad?” I added as an example when that super confused look stayed on his face.

“Like a barnacle?” He said laughing a little like I was somehow amusing him.

“No because that’s an animal and some of them are parasitic,” I pointed out but I faltered because it would be a good comparison in a way. “I guess… yeah?” I amended realizing that he was on to something, relating it in his own way.

“You’re calling me a barnacle?” He confirmed, those dimples shining through making it seem like I wasn’t just trying to insult him.

“I guess, in a way, I am,” I said frowning. I ran my hands up my arm to try and wipe off the feeling of his warm hands on my skin. He shook his head, another low laugh escaping as he looked me over. It was more fitting of a metaphor for him, being a navy man and all. How could I expect him to know anything about plants when his whole job centered around planes and boats.

I turned away, trying to busy myself with the food as Penny flicked on the grill. Pretty much just laying things out so that they were neat and tidy. She came up, and handed me the lighter, “Can you start the grill for me, I want to grab some of the fruit and chips,” Penny chirped before dashing off.

The problem, I had no clue how to start a grill. Yeah, I’d worked with torches and plasma cutter or two but never a grill. Most of my meals outdoors were cooked over a fire. If she wanted me to start a grill, I only knew the random parts like propane and fire. But before I had the chance to tell her that she was darting off leaving me standing alone with Bob and a lighter that made no sense.

I was really starting to wonder if it was best to bail and go home because I was getting really tired of ending up out of my depth. I hadn’t realized I’d stopped moving and was glaring at the offending lighter until that hand was back at my wrist, gently sliding it out of my grip, “wouldn’t want you to burn yourself,” he said lowly as he brushed past me.

“Hey, fuck off,” I grunted more out of reflex than actual annoyance.

“I will, just let me get the grill started for Penny,” he said calmly as he leaned over and turned a random knob and fiddled with the lighter.

“She told me to do it,” I didn’t move to stop him though because I knew I had no clue what the hell he was doing. I could’ve just fucking googled it, I thought to myself sulking a bit that Bob was swooping in to handle yet another thing. Before I was drooling watching him work and now, I wanted to smack him for taking over.

Bob looked over at me, a glance from where he crouched down to click the lighter. Probably where he was lighting the gas. “You looked angrier at the lighter than you did at me when I saved you from falling,” he pointed out with that same smile. Nothing I said was getting to him and I wasn’t sure if it was irritating or comforting. “Something tells me it wasn’t just because Penny was bossing you around.”

Once again, he was reading more than he should’ve, that stupid ability that I hated that Penny had. Was I really that transparent?

“My sisters all have the same problem, a loud face,” he said because apparently my damn thoughts were written on my face clear enough that the man with glasses could see them. I took note, he had sisters, plural. There was something about his energy that did scream sisters, that non-threatening sort of presence that came with growing up around women. Of course he had sisters, because what other green flags could they shove into one person?

“You know, that isn’t exactly the nicest thing to say to someone,” that same offended look I was giving the lighter in its full glory was now turned to Bob because he had the audacity to point out the obvious.

“I think it’s pretty nice to tell someone in case you ever need to lie,” the grill made a soft ‘twft’ noise before the heat started and he stood back up from the crouch he was in.

“You really think you’re the nicest guy,” this was the second time he’d had something to retort back when I called him not nice. If he wasn’t annoying me so badly because he was so attractive I would’ve found him pretty nice too.

“I try my best,” it was a simple and honest answer. Something so genuine that it sounded more like a future promise than a statement.

It was heavy. I had no sarcastic response to throw back at him like a weapon, rather I shifted on my feet while he looked at me. There was more to this glance, once again another analyzing gaze trying to pick me apart. I didn’t feel like being under the microscope so I decided to turn it into an opportunity to quiz Bob. “So… sisters?” I asked trying to loop back to that. “How many?” I asked trying to sound less defensive.

He paused his little staring contest to refocus on me. “Three,” it was the least talkative he had been since I had got him talking. It came out like a tentative admission; he seemed to sense the shift and didn’t trust it.

“Any brothers?” He was right not to trust it; I was leading him away from my own inquisition on his part. He shook his head, indicating a solid no. “Oh you and your dad were outnumbered,” I tried to joke and he didn’t seem to relax at all with my attempt at humor. This poor guy was getting hit with mixed signals from me and I was only making it worse with the attempt at humor.

“It was… just me,” he said tentatively watching my face for a reaction. Of course, like he said, my face was loud. Something he saw though didn’t upset him, I felt surprise at the information that he offered that up but I didn’t think would be enough for that light furrow in his brow to smooth out. “Part time, I mean, during the summers I went to help my dad with his shop in South Carolina, the rest of the year it was just my sisters, mom, and I.”

“And the sheep,” I added because it was like forgetting treasured parts of the family to me to leave out the pets… and immediately felt my inside shrivel up because that was not information I should’ve had. My hand twitched in the need to cover my damn mouth because I couldn’t believe that I had let that fact I knew slip.

It was Bob’s turn to be surprised; his brows rose so much his glasses were tugged up with them. “Now it’s my turn for a question, where’d you learn about my sheep?” He asked leaning forward in a way that made me feel crowded against the gazebo post.

I felt like the sun had turned up the temperature a million degrees. I was sweating, even in my shorts and tank. I opened my mouth but nothing came out, I couldn’t even think of a good lie off the top of my head so my vocal cords felt frozen. I couldn’t run with my back against the post, and there was no way I was moving forward towards him.

I was stuck in a hell of my own making.

He waited though, patiently, looking at me with what could only be described as amusement with a literal fucking twinkle in his eyes. The silence stretched on, and he waited quietly for me to gather my thoughts. I had no Penny dashing in to save me this time from embarrassing myself further. “If I said… your had shepherd callouses?” I squeaked out in a weak attempt at a lie as I decided his shirt was more interesting than his face.

There was a soft laugh from Bob, “I would say you might be right, but I have a feeling that isn’t the truth by the way you’re acting.” He bent a little more to make eye contact not letting me off that easy. When I didn’t keep talking, he decided to fill the silence, “I’m pretty sure the only one in this town who knows that little fact is Penny, and the fact you knew my name before I even introduced myself only adds to my assumption that she might have been talking to you about me.” I closed my eyes willing the ground to open up and swallow me. Where were those famous California sink holes when I needed one? It seemed Bob wasn’t quite done with his whole analysis though, “Something that doesn’t seem too farfetched when she spent the morning trying to give me a not-so-subtle dissertation about you.”

And there it was, Penny had been playing matchmaker so apparent that even a man could tell that she was. Great.

“I think that I hear Penny calling me,” I said trying to slide off to the side to escape this conversation.

“I thought I told you; you had a loud face?” He said snickering at my very obvious lie. I had no comeback for that, nothing. So instead, I tucked my head, held my breath to prepare myself to brush against him, and I slid out to the side. Once again, I was pressed into that strong body of his and I was losing sight of the mission to escape because I was caught up in the sensation of how warm he was and that undertone of musk from his sweat in the hot sun.

“Running away? From Penny’s description of you, I thought you’d have hit me before you did that,” he chuckled as I took off towards the house.

I had no clue where the hell the girls were or Penny or even the fucking dog. No, the one time I needed an interruption and the world was quiet. I made it to the backdoor and it was Amelia who looked at me through the glass and locked it with a grin. I gasped in horror to find my escape blocked by a barely teen, “Mom said you had a bet to finish!” she yelled through the door.

“A bet?” Came that damned deep voice from behind me that was attached to the most infuriating man I had ever met.

It was like the universe was working against me to put me in the most cliché scenarios that made me cringe more than if I was watching it in theaters on the big screen. I took a deep breath because the only other option for this get away was to my car to leave and I knew Penny would skin me alive if I did that. “You have the worst timing, you know that Bob,” I groaned looking up at the sky like there would be some sort of answer there.

“I actually need perfect timing to do my job,” he said with a soft laugh behind me. I didn’t turn around; it was too ridiculous to be in this situation. He was ridiculous, the right side of cheesy that had me wanting to laugh along at his dry jokes. “So, I think it was the perfect time to ask about this bet,” yet another nail in the coffin to point towards the whole conspiracy between Penny and I.

I let out another annoyed noise because he wasn’t going to let this go. There was a long silence and he did that waiting thing while I tried to collect my thoughts. “She had this old guy at the bar she was talking to, Pete, and the only way she was going to tell me the story behind them was if… I got your number,” I admitted after what felt like forever.

“That’s all?” He asked and it sounded like I had caught him off guard with that answer. It felt good to finally have something that threw him off, he was getting too smug for my comfort.

“That’s all?” I huffed, too upset that he seemed so nonchalant about it that I turned around to snap at him. That was a mistake because he was close again and he looked so disarming, it was hard to stay angry.

“Yeah, you’re not asking for a kidney, I think giving you my number isn’t a crazy ask,” he held his hand out to me, “give me your phone, I’ll put it in now,” he offered without judgment. His face was soft; eyes trained on me like I was the only thing of interest and not the faces of ten teen girls and a full-grown woman watching us through the window like we were prime time TV.

I hesitated for a moment before I pulled my phone out, I guess there was no smooth way to pretend like I meant to, to get his number. My whole plan of being smooth was out the window pretty much. I unlocked it, pulling up my contacts before passing it over. “Ever the boy scout helping the less fortunate,” I said under my breath.

“You and Penny had a long conversation,” he said wheezing out a laugh because that was yet another piece of information that she’d slipped me that I shouldn’t have.

“You know how she talks,” I said praying the door was thick enough she couldn’t hear that because I knew for a fact if she did, my ass was going to be served a heaping pile of retribution. God wasn’t on my side though because I heard an indignant and muffled ‘hey!’ in the quiet between Bob and I.

He handed me my phone back and I noticed the messages were open, “to make sure I had you number too, I didn’t trust you to actually use it,” he said flashing his teeth in the smile this time – cheeky.

“What’s next, you set a profile photo and custom ringtone?” I asked grabbing my phone back and… he had a photo set with him sticking his tongue out at the camera. How had I not noticed him do that in the short time span of him inputting his number?

I didn’t catch him text himself too, a man too smart for his own good really, I thought to myself as I tucked the device back in my pocket. “With that settled, I think the girls can come back out so we can have dinner,” he said waving to the group who all squealed when his gaze went back to them.

Me too guys, me too.

Chapter Text

I felt everything heat up inside of when the door clicked open and there was a grinning Penny, “I am going to get to making dinner!” She was moving forward and looping her arms to tuck Bob on one side and me on the other. “We have some hungry girls; I think it is best that you two help me out. I think that it is best that you both run down to the market, I am out of sodas to pair with our food. It isn’t an all American cook out without soda and juice,” she chirped happily.

I was about to object, there was no reason for me to run along with Bob when I could do it myself, but there was Bob was agreeing for the both of us before I could object and Penny was dipping out from between us leaving me tucked into Bob’s side. My breath hitched as his arm fell over my shoulder and I felt myself glaring at the woman who betrayed me so blatantly to push us together. “We can take my truck,” he said softly. I tried to tug myself away from his arm over my shoulder but there was no chance, he tightened his hold just minimally and started to steer me towards his truck.

“I didn’t agree to this little run,” I huffed as I tried to dig my heels in. It wasn’t as effective as I wanted it to be though with him still moving us like I didn’t dig in at all.

“What happened to providing for your girls?” He teased turning his body to force more eye contact, knowing damn well that there was no way that I could deny that when he talked like that.

My glare was connected to him now as scorching as I could make it, “yeah! What happened to providing for us!” Amelia parroted lightly from somewhere off to the side of me. I was contemplating smacking Bob for even daring to stir up shit with the girls now, this man did nothing but push my buttons.

“You are going to shove us both in a car where you can’t escape me fighting you?” I asked lowly not glancing at Amelia, rather holding Bob’s gaze with all the contained fury of being backed into a corner. I defaulted to threatening the poor man because it was easier than just accepting that there would be some lingering tension.

“Or, you’ll be stuck in a car where you can’t escape me,” he said with that same small smile that brought out his dimple. There was nothing that I could do that seemed to shake this man, all he did was smile and laugh a little like I was as amusing as a hissing cat. I paused for a second trying to come up with a snarky response but found nothing, rather I decided to use my other

“Penny!” I yelled breaking eye contact with Bob to glance at her, “did you hear that? He’s threatening me!” I caught Penny laughing to herself and shaking her head as she threw some burgers on the grill. No sympathy or worry that a military man would be threatening me, just laughing at my antics.

“Bob, be gentle with our girl,” she sing songed as she shot me a wink before tending back to the burgers and meat.

Our girl.

“I promise to be nothing but gentle with our girl Ms. Benjamin,” Bob responded doing nothing besides tugging me closer and steering me towards his truck. My face heated to the point of almost painful because there he was saying the same thing Penny did. Only the low timbre of his voice and the closeness was causing me melt more than I was already. “Come on then, we have to get the girls some drinks,” he said with a soft laugh at the look of shock on my face.

I didn’t get a word in edgewise before he was tugging me along and opening the door to his truck for me. “I can get my own damn door,” I growled.

“I promised Penny I would be gentle with our girl,” he said like it was a simple fact like the sky was blue. “That means I open your door,” that dimple was dangerous because I faltered in my annoyance.

“I am a full-grown woman with working hands, I can open my own door,” I huffed reaching to close the door again but before I could re-open it Bob was there – faster than me – to open it. He quirked his brow at me and my little tantrum.

“And I made a sacred vow to Penny that I can’t break,” he said clicking his tongue at me. He took my elbow in one hand and used his other to slowly shift my hip to usher me into the car. “You gonna make a liar out of me?” He asked as I slid into the car. The hand on my elbow going up to cover my head to make sure I didn’t hit it on the edge of the car.

“Stupid fucking gender role bullshit,” I bit out. I was used to this stupid act guys put on and it only resulted in being treated as less than later down the line. I had worked too damn hard to be taken seriously and seen as an equal to the men around me, especially dealing with some of the other servicemen on base. Technically Bob had never done something personally to me but my hackles were risen at the idea that he was heading down that road. With a laugh Bob leaned back into my space, grabbing the seatbelt before I could buckle myself in and he was faster yet again, anticipating my moves.

“More like I don’t trust you not to run,” he said meeting my gaze.

With that he pulled his hand back after buckling me, his touch barely grazing my hip in the most respectful way possible – meaning he yanked his touch back to ensure he wasn’t making unnecessary contact. With that he closed his truck door and was jogging around to his driver side. I watched him but I was distracted because I was in his truck. I suddenly was trying to soak in details as much as possible.

He had a white ford ranger, older, with the classic grey fabric interior. The dash was clean, the cupholder on the side of the gear shift on the driver’s side housing a very familiar bright yellow energy drink can. It made me giggle a little to myself, seeing something so candy sweet yet so potent sitting open like he had been working his way through it this morning. The bench seat had always been something I admired in older trucks; no seat covers though. This man was clean, he took care of his things, there wasn’t anything that stuck out as too damning.

I looked over and saw the crank window and immediately set to work rolling mine down, if I was going to banished inside the truck like a toddler then I would be rolling down the windows like a kid goofing around too. The leather steering wheel had a small detail that made me giggle as he opened his door. “Rebel Alliance?” I asked looking at him as he opened his own truck door.

“Of course,” he said shaking his head as he climbed into the cab. There were small Rebel Alliance patterns on his cover, almost indiscernible if I hadn’t been snooping on purpose with the soft black color. “You think I would ever support the empire?” He asked starting his truck. A soft back drop of someone narrating “The Lost World” started up and immediately Bob was sheepishly pausing it.

“You are enlisted in the military,” I countered with a snort. I watched him take a breath, like he hadn’t exactly expected me to point that out so bluntly as he leaned back in his seat. It was another one of those moments that I think I threw him off.

He looked at me out of the corner of his eye, “I… uh… I had to… to pay for school,” he said a bit softer. “I wanted to do Aerospace Engineering… my dad lived in South Carolina so I could apply there and get in state tuition but I still couldn’t afford it. My mom had four kids she was supporting and my dad wasn’t exactly happy to see any of us go off to school… turns out they can make promises when you sign up to do one thing but if you score good in other places, they’re going to put you where they need,” he added.

“I was a really good pilot and had a knack for weapons specifically. As soon as I was done with courses, I didn’t even get to walk at graduation before I was shipped off. They shoved me into Officer Candidate School all the way in Rhode Island and quickly heading out to the indoctrination course at Naval Aviation Schools Command in Pensacola. I moved on to flight training for my junior officer tour without a break to even go home and see my mom. I tested well enough to land me in Top Gun at that time, it’s when I met Penny originally, stuck out here so far from everyone for even longer. I ended up on the weapons system track because of the engineering background and landed in my first deployment with the VFA-51 Screaming Eagles to Syria as soon as I got my wings.” I hadn’t expected Bob to explain it all to me. I had meant it to be a light hearted poke at him and suddenly I felt like an asshole.

“You wanted to be… mechanic for planes?” I asked a bit more reserved. I was trying to tone down the bite while we drove. I wasn’t even paying attention to anything else besides his profile and the occasional flick of his wrists when he shifted.

“Originally I wanted to build rockets to go to space, I had a small fear of heights but I really love the stars,” I could see that soft quirk in his lips again from this side.

“You… fly now and you don’t like heights?” I asked feeling a bit shocked.

“Yeah, that is why I don’t mind being in the back looking at the weapons rather than trying to steer the plane. I am really thankful I have a great pilot like Phoenix who I can trust to not kill us,” he said shrugging. “I puked the first time I went up but I guess adrenaline and anxiety make for really sharp skills.”

“And you somehow passed Top Gun?” I blurted absolutely flabbergasted that this man was afraid of heights.  

“My mom used to always tell me to fake it until I made it,” he shot me a small smile before turning back to the road.

“You made it alright… into a career that you are actually scared of,” I couldn’t help but laugh. A real laugh, the idea that a pilot didn’t like heights was hilarious in the most ironic way. Like a pastry chef with celiac disease or if a firefighter was scared of a blaze.

“Hey! I do much better now, it’s only mild panic when we dip down, I haven’t thrown up since my first tour from the nerves,” his own laugher joined mine in the small cab and it truly felt like we were sharing a moment. Something real, where I didn’t have a wall up to try and keep him at a distance.

“The son of a sheep farmer and mechanic wanted to help people reach the stars and instead got shot up himself to touch the sky,” I said fondly. “Explains the Star Wars merch,” I said giggling.

“I liked the stars before I saw Star Wars,” he corrected. “Mom had a large area of land out in Wyoming, not many people there to pollute the view of the sky.”

I nodded, “so you know all about the constellations?” The sky was bright at this moment but a part of me could picture us laying out on the beach while he pointed out the stars.

“Most of them yeah, and the planets.”

“Next time we’re underway I think it would be fun to stargaze if we’re ever on the same ship,” and somehow, I was making plans with him? I wasn’t sure what possessed me to blurt that request.

“Penny just said you did research?” Bob was pulling into some store I hadn’t really been paying attention too and backing us into a space to park. “Are you enlisted?” He questioned as he flipped the truck off and leaned towards me with an assessing gaze.

“Me? God no,” I couldn’t help the laugh that escaped. “Do I look like I could pass reg?” I asked waving my hand over my body. Bob sputtered for a moment and I could see a light blush actually dust his ears.

“I never… I didn’t… it’s not like…” Bob’s sputtering had me feeling a bit self-satisfied because once again, I had managed to throw him off when kept throwing me off. Not like I was keeping score or anything, because that would be childish to be highly competitive.

“I asked if I could pass reg, not if you would hit it, you can calm down,” I snarked and went to try and open the door so we could finish our mission to get drinks… that was what snapped Bob out of his nervous tizzy, he was rushing over to my door to open it for me like the gentleman he was.

“Nice diversion, but you have to be quicker than that,” he said in a rush. I huffed at him and went to yank my door closed and lock it so I could open my own damn door… the problem was the window was all the way open from my earlier move which left Bob laughing and sticking his hand through the open window – with me batting at it – and easily reopening it for me. “You really do like making my life difficult,” he said shaking his head at my antics.

“I like living in the 21^st century,” I grumbled not moving from the truck. He had my door open and it was a standoff, me watching him and that stupid little smile back on his face like I was somehow amusing when I was trying to be infuriating. It was a few moments frozen like that, until he remembered that he had his size on me, simply reaching for my hip and swiping me off the bench seat with his forearm forcing me out of the truck. “Asshole!” I yelped as I tried to get my feet under me, I didn’t even have a chance to stumble because he was there, large hands on my shoulders to keep me steady.

“I won’t let you fall; I promised Penny-“

I swatted at his arms before he could finish what he had to say, “I heard you before,” I grumbled stepping back away from him. I stumbled a little, thankfully catching myself on the frame of the truck – only for Bob to reach for me again.

“You are one of the least coordinated people I have ever met,” it was a playful tease rather than a mean comment.

“Because you’re constantly in my bubble!” I snapped trying to shoo him off of me. For a second Bob assessed me, stepping back a bit. That playful look on his face dropping, there was a look I couldn’t parse out that came over his face.

“Am I… invading your space to the point that is uncomfortable?” His hands withdrew from me and moved to his side.

I took a second to consider my words, the push and pull I had been enjoying overall, he was frustrating but in the same way as trying to pass a level on a videogame. “I… it’s not uncomfortable,” I eventually said. “You’re annoying but in a nonthreatening way,” I added. “If I really did hate it, I would’ve broken your nose or something.” He wouldn’t be the first man I would’ve hurt because they were too pushy or touchy more than I wanted.

“So… you just like being able to push back and have someone tease you?” He asked bending to make eye contact with me. Like he wanted to make sure that he could see any line of deception that would flicker through me.

“Yeah, I guess you could describe it like that,” I admitted. It wasn’t exactly the way I would call it; I tended to come off more gruff than I meant to when I was trying to control my surroundings. The control felt more comfortable for me, always with my own plan and way of doing things to ensure they were done correctly. Most people didn’t push back against me, it wasn’t always insane asks like opening my own damn door, but Bob seemed to take a certain kind of pleasure in riling me up.

“You would tell me blatantly if you were uncomfortable?” He asked, that intense look back in his eyes, that missing dimple that I was starting to miss. I nodded; I tried to make sure that I was calm with it even when I wanted to be more enthusiastic. “Promise?” He held up his hand, poking his pinky towards me. Something warmed inside my chest, it was such an innocent but honest gesture. I looked at his hand for a second before I linked my pinky with his.

“Promise,” I affirmed as he tapped our thumbs together and brought our linked hands to kiss my thumb ever so gently. He turned our hands so I could kiss his thumb too. I hesitated, raising my brow in confusion at him.

“You’re sealing the promise,” he said moving our hands closer to my face. “It’s a part of the ritual.” I rolled my eyes at him and went with it, bringing his thumb up to my lips and set a soft kiss to the skin. “Glad we settled that,” he said smiling. Somehow, he had drifted closer, I watched him kiss my thumb by taking it near his face but I could feel his breath on my face and see the fleck of green around the outer part of his iris at this distance. Pretty green and blue, reminding me of a deep river with how intense and dark the blue was, the green reminding me of with little lily pads flecking the surface.

We lingered like that for a moment; I was caught in his gaze holding his pinky. His hand radiated warmth even from the one point of contact. The gold of the frame of his glasses reflected in his eyes adding the optical illusion across the black of his pupil. Indents on his nose, little pink spots where his glasses moved along the bridge, small divots from where they sat all day normally and fainter lines where it drifts off.

There were quite a few faint freckles over his cheeks probably from the sun exposure being in the sky so often, soft crow’s feet at the corner of his eyes like he smiled a lot. Strong lines at the inner part of his eyebrows and the deeper lines around his mouth that pulled making his expressions more bold. It was kind of cute, his right eyebrow he had three moles, one at each end and in the middle where the arch was.

But then his dimple made an appearance and I realized I had been staring… intently. For long enough to get a read on all the minute aspects of his face.

And in a second, I was dropping his hand like it burned and trying to step back, trying being the operative word. I just shuffled mostly against the metal of the truck. “We should go get the drinks,” I said quickly sliding as quick as possible to escape the fact that I had been caught.

“Yeah, drinks,” he said coming up behind me sounding back to his teasing tone. “Gotta make sure we get the kids something to sip on.”

It felt oddly domestic to walk into the store with him, he grabbed the cart, letting me lead and all I had to do was look at something for a lingering moment before he was picking things up and tossing them in the cart, “we are doing this for nine girls, not nine hundred,” I said after the fourth box of soda was added.

“I mean, you can never have too many fun options,” he said waving his hand. “They’re young, I think it’s okay to spoil them. If we have extras then they can have it next time they do a little hang out,” he said like it was nothing.

So why was my heart fluttering at that. My brain filling in blanks, seeing him as a father in the future. The same attitude of provide. It was jarring and I tried to ignore the stupid little image of him holding a baby that my brain conjured up. I wasn’t even sure if I wanted to be a mother, much less picturing children with a man I just met. It was insane.

“You’re buying then,” I said shooting him a look as he added another box of soda bringing the total up to five.

“Of course I’m buying?” The incredulous shock on his face to imply that he wouldn’t be looked almost offended.

In total we ended up with seven different sodas, all name brand because “the girls deserved the best” according to Bob, three juices, a set of energy drinks, and even a few packs of sweets. I laughed because he hauled it all out to his truck and loaded it too. I was really there just to stand by and huff because he wasn’t letting me do anything. Even going as far as to corner me to get in the truck so he could put the cart away.

It shouldn’t have been sexy that he put a cart away but it seemed that my standards were in hell. A man putting away a cart like a decent human being shouldn’t make me salivate. That was totally insane really. Bob was coming back around and I had to force my gaze to my phone, to look at something else so he didn’t know that I was looking at him.

I didn’t say anything as he started up the truck… until he was pulling into the adjacent coffee drive through. “You know, Penny is going to think we were kidnapped with how long this outing took,” I said snickering. “You really need to stop for coffee when you could’ve asked this morning,” I teased.

Bob sent me a little smile, something soft and shy. It made his eyes shine in amusement like there was a secret I didn’t know. He rolled down his window and the old speaker crackled with a voice welcoming us and asking for our order. I figured Bob needed coffee or a new energy drink since he was warm inside the car from our little shopping trip. “Can I have a large, iced, hazelnut latte please?” He asked into the speaker. I felt almost fond that we had the same order until he continued to speak, “And a small watermelon energy drink?”

“Wait Bob,” I leaned forward to tell the speaker to forget the coffee because that man was ordering for me.

How did he know my drink order? I thought to myself, I hadn’t mentioned it to him so unless he looked at my drink and took note of what was on the cup then he wouldn’t have known. Did he care enough to take note of my coffee order? I didn’t have the chance though to remove the coffee because his arm was thrown across my shoulders locking me against the seat.

“You are going to sit back and relax while I get the damn coffee,” he said not letting go. “I need both hands to steer, you get let go when the screen changes,” he said watching until the order was completely input before letting me go and moving us forward.

“I don’t need you buying me another coffee Bob,” I huffed. “It’s like four in the afternoon, and a large? I am going to be up all night,” it was the best reasoning I could come up with to take it off the order.

“Then we put the rest in the fridge for tomorrow,” he said shrugging. As soon as I saw the window person, I opened my mouth to correct the order but his arm was going back out to hold me back into the seat. He had put the truck in park and managed to fish his wallet out one handed.

I loudly started to protest, “You can take the latte-“ but Bob’s voice was cutting mine off.

“Thank you,” he said offering the girl who was at the window a smile and handing his card. I glared at him but before I could talk over him again the drink carrier was being handed and he was setting it on the bench seat and pulling forward. “Take your drink,” he said glancing at me and letting my shoulders go to grab my drink from the carrier and offering it to me.

I took the coffee so he could drive, he needed a hand to shift and to steer. “You know I’m not drinking this because you bought it,” I grumbled. “I just don’t like things going to waste.” I held the coffee; I could smell the sweetness which was another problem because it smelled perfect.

I was just a human, taking a sip of it to see if it tasted as good as it smelled. And by god it did, I smiled around the straw because it was really fucking good coffee. It wasn’t fair that he knew where the good coffee was and that he used my weakness against me.

“That look doesn’t say that you hate it,” he teased causing my smile to turn into a pout.

“Shut the hell up and drive,” I grumbled. Bob let out a low laugh and reached for his own drink to sip off of.

“Don’t worry, I’ll get us home so the girls can have their drinks too. I just wanted something special for us,” he said looking at me out of the corner of his eye.

Yet again that sent my heart racing. He wanted something special for us. It should’ve been something casual, a treat because we had gone out like me buying myself a chicken bacon bake at Costco for braving the store… but somehow this felt like more.

The ride back felt quicker, and we were pulling up to Penny’s house in no time. It was a comfortable silence with Bob driving, and me watching the coast move by. Like before he was shooting out of the driver’s side to jog up and open my door, “you are going to-“ I was going to threaten him again when we had a hoard of girls ‘ooing’ and ‘awing’ at us while chittering about the drinks that drowned out my voice. They drew in close and swarmed the truck, pushing Bob out of the way to get to me.

“Bob is such a gentleman… he is so cute… oh he really likes you… are you two going to kiss…” all the voices melted together into one. It made me giggle a little at their naive idea about romance but also want to curl into a ball and hide because their attention was too much.

I couldn’t get out to grab the drinks, a couple of the other girls and Bob were grabbing the boxes out of the truck. I was shooing the ones off that had swarmed seeing the cute man open my door for me with one hand, clutching my coffee in the other while I sipped. Walking over to the little gazebo where Penny was grilling away like a pro. It felt like another good family get together, something warm and soft. A place of belonging. It always felt like that around Penny and the other girls, helping heal that ache for belonging.

Only there was Bob, coming out with a bottled water extended to me. “Coffee is hydrating to a point but you also need water too,” he said softly putting the bottle in my hand – holding it there until my fingers twitched and held on.

“You are worse than my mother,” I said clicking my tongue at him.

“I am attentive,” he teased.

“You are overbearing,” I corrected.

“I am considerate.”

“Despotic,” my tone was clipped as I eyed the bottle in my hand.

“Caring.”

“Are you two done?” Came Penny’s voice. I looked over and she had a stack of burgers and hot dogs all settled on a plate with toasted buns. “It’s time to eat and you’re sickeningly cute, I can’t have the girls gagging on their supper,” she waved her spatula at me like it was a pointed wand.

I would’ve flipped her off but I had the damn water bottle in my hand and coffee. I sighed and walked over to set my drinks down, Bob hot on my heels. Not so much in the oppressive way that made me feel suffocated but it was almost comforting, to know he was there. I focused instead on trying to set up my place at the table, adding a couple napkins and settled in so the girls could get their dinner first and I would follow.

I watched them file in, stacking burgers and hotdogs high with toppings, chatting and giggling in the way that every girl would know from slumber parties and sleepovers of the youth. Well, maybe not even youth because when Amelia would visit her friends Penny and I would be giggling in the same way over a bottle of wine. They were still too young to drink but I saw it in their futures, more nights together as they went off to college while they laughed together cramming over finals and talking about boys.

I jumped when a plate materialized in front of me, a deconstructed burger and hot dog set nice and neat with the toppings on the side so I could dress up whichever one I wanted in the way I wanted. “You were in your head, I wanted to make sure you got some before the pack of girls settled in for seconds,” Bob said smiling down at me. He took up residence in a chair next to mine.

He had his own plate, a simple burger with some lettuce beside it. “I could’ve gotten it myself; I wanted to make sure they all ate,” I grumbled looking at the plate. It was a sweet gesture really. It made something inside me warm once again, I was used to the reverse growing up. The women always made the plates; it was some antiquated expectations to serve the men. Something that really pissed me off most of the time.

Once again Bob was surprising me in a way that wasn’t unwanted. “There’s enough, I was exaggerating, I just wanted to make you a plate,” he said pushing the plate again just a little more toward me. “C’mon, you’ve only had the breakfast that Penny made you, coffee and doughnuts today,” he said in that slightly coaxing way.

I thought about snipping at him again. To tell him to fuck off and that I could handle it myself but something held me back, that tender feeling of being cared for. He just wanted to make me a plate. It was a new feeling for me, the level of care that Bob was showing me. A background care that wasn’t suffocating but comforting in a way that made it easier to breathe. Like a part of the burden of just existing was being taken off my shoulders.

So, for the first time I relaxed a little, I didn’t fight against it to keep my own level of control. Rather I reached for the burger to dress it up how I liked, grabbing a bite when the bottle of water was set next to my plate, now open. I took a bite of the burger, instead washing it down with the lovely coffee he had gotten me.

Just because I gave a little didn’t mean I had to let him go all the way.

I caught the little smirk Bob had looking at me while we sat and ate together. We had more of that comfortable silence, in a way that was surprisingly nice. There was no pressure to fill it, just to enjoy each other’s company.