Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

“Jude!” 

“Yeah?” 

“C’mere and tell me what you think of this outfit,” Yaz called from the bathroom. Jude had gone over to the Khans’ flat to walk over with Yaz to their friends Ryan and Tibo’s housewarming party that night, and was currently waiting for Yaz to finish getting ready. 

When they reached the open bathroom door, Jude raised an eyebrow in appreciation. Yaz was wearing something Jude had never seen her in before - a deep red, high-neck, sleeveless dress that showed off her toned shoulders and arms and also made Jude feel a bit underdressed (which, to be fair, wasn’t an unusual occurrence). “Damn, Khan. You trying to impress someone tonight?” 

Yaz shrugged. “Maybe,” she said playfully. “What would my chances be, do you think?” 

“If they’re not a bloody idiot, they’d be in love with you by the time the night was over,” Jude said solemnly. 

A strange expression flickered across Yaz’s face before she smiled. “Not too much? I wasn’t going to get the dress, but Sonya insisted.” 

“She’s got good taste,” Jude responded. “I think you should wear it.” 

Yaz looked back in the mirror, fiddling with her hair that she had plaited and tied up ( how she managed to do styles like that, Jude had never figured out) before taking in a deep breath. “Okay, then. I think I’m ready.” 

“Cool. You sure I look okay?” Jude asked nervously. They’d opted for something a lot simpler - just a white tank top, black trousers, and their favourite leather jacket. Parties were already something that took a lot of their energy; Jude didn’t want to make things harder on themselves by wearing clothes that felt uncomfortable. 

“You look great, Jude,” Yaz said, and Jude couldn’t hear a hint of dishonesty in her words. “Seriously.” 

Jude smiled shyly, feeling a sudden heat rush to their cheeks. “Right,” they said, clapping their hands together. “Let’s get a shift on, then!” 

***

They somehow managed to get to Ryan and Tibo’s new flat about ten minutes early, which Jude was happy about. They hadn’t seen the boys (as they were affectionately referred to by Jude and Yaz) in a few weeks due to everyone’s busy schedules, and they were glad to get the chance to say hello before the evening chaos that they were sure was coming began. 

Tibo answered the door, a wry grin spreading across his face at the sight of them. “I thought we said no gifts.” 

“I couldn’t resist,” Jude said, holding out the messily-wrapped box they were carrying. 

“Well, thank you,” Tibo said with a smile as he took the present, waving them inside. “Ryan’s just finishing setting up the music,” he added. “I made him promise not to play anything too bass-y, though.” 

Jude smiled gratefully. Tibo may have been the newest member of their friend group, but he had quickly picked up on some of Jude’s little quirks and always tried to be as inclusive as possible. 

When they got to the lounge room, Ryan looked up, a smile spreading across his face when he saw them. He quickly walked over, giving them both a hug. Jude wasn’t always one for hugs, but Ryan was one of the few they didn’t mind one from occasionally. 

“What do you think?” Ryan asked, gesturing around them. “Pretty sweet flat, yeah?” 

“It looks great,” Yaz said appreciatively. “Nice little setup.” 

“Yeah,” Jude agreed. “Although it is missing one thing…” 

Ryan furrowed his brows. “What’s that?” 

“I assume whatever is in this box,” Tibo said, raising an eyebrow. 

Ryan narrowed his eyes at Jude. “I thought we said no gifts.” 

“Yes, yes, I know,” Jude replied, waving him off. “It’s nowt. Just open it.” 

Ryan sighed, rolling his eyes in amusement before he and Tibo began unwrapping the box. 

“It’s a lava lamp!” Jude said excitedly as the last bit of wrapping paper came off. “ And it's blue and orange, ‘cause those are the best colours.” 

“Oh my god, I haven’t had one of these since I was a kid,” Tibo said with a laugh. “This is great, Jude. Thank you.” 

“Never been a fan of growing up,” Jude said smugly. “Lava lamps make everything cooler. It’s a proven fact.” 

“And what is your source, exactly?” Yaz asked teasingly. 

“Me,” Jude quipped. “I know lots of things.” 

“Alright, bighead,” Yaz said fondly. 

“Oi! Did you just call me bighead?” Jude turned to Ryan, affronted. “Did you hear that?” 

Ryan held up his hands in surrender. “Nope. Not getting in the middle of that one.” 

“Smart move,” Yaz said sweetly, and Jude lightly shoved her. They looked at each other, and Jude couldn’t stop the smile that spread across their face. 

“Can I get you guys anything to drink?” Tibo asked, an amused expression on his face as he looked between them. 

“Mind if I use the loo first, actually?” Yaz asked. “Forgot to go before we walked over.”  

“Course. It’s the first door on the left,” Tibo said, pointing. “Jude?” 

“Do you have any cider?” they asked hopefully. 

Tibo smiled. “Sure do. Be right back.” 

Jude turned to Ryan. “So? Anything new happened recently?” they asked. “Feels like we haven’t seen each other in ages.” 

“It has been awhile,” Ryan agreed. “And actually… yeah. There is something I - we - wanted to tell you guys.”
“Yeah? What is it?” Jude asked excitedly. “Are you guys getting a communal cat? A dog? Ooh, did you finally try the custard cream sandwich I recommended?” 

“N - no,” Ryan , shooting a sideways glance at Tibo, who was walking back from the kitchen. “No, we haven’t tried that yet. And we’re not getting a pet.” 

“Oh. Then what is it?” Jude tilted their head curiously, taking the drink that Tibo held out to them.

Ryan took in a deep breath. “We’re together,” he said, looking at Tibo with an uncharacteristic shyness.

Jude’s brows furrowed. “Well, yeah,” they said, confused. “You usually are. You live in the same flat.” 

Tibo pressed his lips together like he was trying not to laugh, and Ryan smiled wryly. “No, like. We’re dating. He’s my boyfriend now.” 

Jude’s eyes widened. “Oh! Brilliant!” They looked over at Yaz, who was currently walking back towards them. “Yaz! They’re boyfriends!” 

Yaz’s face lit up into a grin. “About damn time.”

“That’s what I said,” Tibo said playfully, looking at Ryan adoringly. 

“Oi!” Ryan replied indignantly. “I got there in the end.” 

“Congratulations, you two,” Yaz said warmly, giving them both a hug. “Seriously. I’m so happy for you.” 

“Me too,” Jude agreed, grinning. “This is ace.” 

“Alright, no need to go on about it,” Ryan said bashfully. “Everyone else should be getting here soon. Can I get you a drink, Yaz?” 

***

A couple hours later, the party was in full swing and Jude had a nice buzz going on. There were more people there than Jude would have usually preferred, but everyone they’d met had seemed nice. There were a few of Ryan’s friends from his mechanics classes, some of Tibo’s uni friends, some friends of those friends. Jude had forgotten a lot of their names, but they suspected that most of them probably didn’t remember theirs, either. 

“We should play a game,” Mels - one of Tibo’s good friends from uni that they had hung out with quite a bit over the last couple years, along with her girlfriend Clara - suggested. “Never Have I Ever?” 

Ryan looked at Tibo, who shrugged. “Sure.” 

Jude shifted nervously from their spot beside Yaz on the couch. Games like this always made them feel out of place; they always felt like they hadn’t experienced life in the same way as most other people their age had. 

As if sensing their discomfort, Yaz linked their pinkies together, and Jude instantly calmed a little. 

“I’ll start,” Yaz said, surprising Jude. “Never have I ever broken a bone.” 

Jude softened as they realised what she was doing. Yaz had been the one to go with Jude to the hospital when they had broken their arm after falling out a tree back in year nine. They took a drink, shooting Yaz a grateful look. 

They played several more rounds, with Jude occasionally getting to take a drink. Mels was by far one of the most adventurous in their group - very rarely was there something that she hadn’t done. It was impressive, honestly, and Jude wished they had a bit more of her boldness. She clearly didn’t give a fuck about what anyone else thought of her. 

“Never have I ever kissed a girl,” Mels said smugly before taking another drink. Jude was pretty sure that this wasn’t the original intention of the people who created the game, and that Mels was just trying to get as drunk as possible - but no one else seemed to mind as everyone took a drink. 

Everyone except Jude, that is. 

If they had been smarter, maybe, or faster on the uptake, they might have taken a drink just to blend in. As it was, Mels immediately zeroed in on them. “You’ve never kissed a girl before?” she asked, and her genuine surprise sent a flicker of annoyance through Jude. 

Truth be told, they’d never kissed anyone before, but they weren’t about to tell Mels (and everyone else) that. Only Yaz knew, as far as they were aware. 

Jude shrugged, trying to play it off. “Nah.” 

Mels pressed her lips together, a smirk spreading across her face as she raised an eyebrow. “Then I dare you to kiss Yaz.” 

Jude felt Yaz go still beside them, and their heart began to race. “We’re not even playing truth or dare,” they said, their throat going dry. Why was the thought of kissing Yaz so terrifying? She was their best friend. Friends kissed each other sometimes; at least, that’s what Jude had heard. No matter that they had been best friends for ten years and never done anything like that. 

Or, again, that Jude had never kissed anyone before. 

Besides, who was to say that Yaz even wanted to play along? It was quite shitty of Mels, really, putting them on the spot like this. 

“We are now,” Mels said, completely ignoring the tension that had formed in the air. Was there tension? Was Jude overthinking everything? It wouldn’t be the first time that had happened, and it certainly wouldn’t be the last. They should really just look at Yaz, shouldn’t they? That would be a good start. God, why was their chest so tight? 

“Hey,” Yaz murmured beside them, her voice an instant balm to Jude’s anxiety. “You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do.” 

Jude finally managed to look up at Yaz, immediately relaxing at the sight of her warm brown eyes looking into Jude’s own. 

“I mean, it’s up to you, too,” Jude said, swallowing hard as they tried to ignore the several pairs of eyes on them both. 

Something flickered across Yaz’s face, an expression that Jude was too slow to understand before it was gone. “S’fine with me.” 

“Oh.” Jude wasn’t sure what they had been expecting Yaz to say, if they were being honest with themselves. Their stomach did somersaults as their gaze flickered over to Mels, who was watching them both with a challenging glint in her eye. 

Jude turned back to Yaz, their tongue darting out to wet their lips. Why were they so nervous? It was just Yaz. Yaz, who was looking at them right now with her lips parted. Had her lips always looked this soft? Not that Jude had spent a lot of time staring at her lips. That would be weird, wouldn’t it? But they knew she did love her lip balm. 

Yaz leaned forward a little bit, looking at Jude hesitantly. Jude nodded, answering her unspoken question, their heart pounding so loudly in their chest that it was a surprise no one else could hear it. 

Their lips met, and Jude’s heart tripped over itself. Yaz’s lips were as soft as they looked, it turned out, and tasted like strawberries. Jude tentatively began to move their lips against hers, and they heard Yaz’s breath hitch. That was good, right? Maybe Jude was doing this right. 

The world seemed to disappear around them, and Jude felt like they were floating as their worries about their inexperience disappeared. They hadn’t been this dizzy before - had they really drunk that much tonight? Maybe it was just hitting them now that their eyes were closed. Yeah. That had to be it. 

Jude pulled back, taking a second before they slowly opened their eyes. Yaz was watching them, her eyes wide as she licked her lips nervously. 

“So? How was it?” Mels’ question was faint in Jude’s ears as they tried to reorient themselves. 

“Brilliant,” they breathed without thinking, feeling their cheeks immediately flush as Yaz swallowed hard before turning back towards the group. 

“Good to know I’ve still got it,” Yaz said, taking a swig of her drink. “Now, Mels . I dare you to give Clara a lap dance.” 

Mels flashed her a grin. “Oh, sweetie,” she said, already standing up and taking off her jacket. “You’re all about to get a show.” 

***

Jude was still feeling rather buzzed when everyone started to head home. Mels and Clara had been the first to leave, and Jude already felt bad for whichever Uber driver was unfortunate enough to pick them up, considering how handsy they had been progressively getting in the last half hour. After that it had been a domino effect, and soon enough it was only Jude and Yaz left with Tibo and Ryan.

“You sure you don’t want some help cleaning up?” Jude asked, their brows furrowed. 

“Nah, we got it,” Ryan said easily. “I’m really glad you guys could make it, though.” 

“Wouldn’t have missed it,” Yaz said warmly. “We should all grab dinner sometime next week, yeah? Something a bit more… relaxed.” 

Tibo laughed. “It’s a date.” 

Jude’s heart skipped a beat. God, that kiss had really thrown them out of whack. The four of them had all gone out before many times; this wasn’t even the first time it had been referred to as a ‘date’. But now that Ryan and Tibo were officially together, it felt… different. Which was ridiculous. 

After saying their final goodbyes, Yaz and Jude stood outside the door to the flat for a moment in awkward silence. 

“Did you want to come over?” Jude finally asked, suddenly feeling a flutter of nervousness. They weren’t sure why; it wasn’t an uncommon thing for Yaz to crash at their place when they’d stayed out too late. 

Yaz quickly checked her phone. “Sure,” she answered. “Mind if I stay the night, then? Mum’s got a big meeting in the morning; I don’t want to accidentally wake them up this late.” 

“Yeah,” Jude said quickly. Too quickly. What was going on with them tonight? “Yeah, course.” 

Yaz gave them a hesitant smile and they started walking towards Jude’s flat. Luckily, all three of them happened to live near each other, and it wasn’t a far walk from Ryan’s place. 

Soon enough, Jude was unlocking the door, nearly dropping the key as they tried to put it in the lock. 

“Didn’t think you were that drunk,” Yaz quipped. 

Jude stuck their tongue out at her as they pushed open the door, gesturing for Yaz to go first. 

Once they followed her in, they were suddenly struck by how messy the flat looked. They’d always been a bit scatterbrained, always getting distracted and leaving things everywhere. There were five mugs on the table alone, next to a few dog-eared books. Their guitar was still on the couch from where they’d been playing earlier that afternoon before realising they were nearly late to meet Yaz. 

“Sorry it’s so cluttered,” Jude muttered as they stood awkwardly. 

“It usually is, Jude,” Yaz said teasingly. “I am over here quite often, you know. Used to it by this point.” 

Jude blushed. “Oh. Right.” They scrunched their nose, wringing their hands together. “Would you like a cuppa? Got some custard creams somewhere around here, too. And mini eggs, unless you ate them all last time. Or -”

“Jude,” Yaz interrupted. “What’s wrong?” 

“What? Nothing’s wrong,” Jude said immediately, shifting nervously. 

Yaz pressed her lips together, taking in a deep breath. “Look… I really don’t want that kiss to make things weird between us.” 

Jude swallowed hard, their mind immediately recalling the taste of Yaz’s lips on their own, how soft and full they had felt against theirs. “Right. Me neither.” 

“It were just a kiss, yeah?” Yaz asked, giving a little shrug. “It doesn’t… it doesn’t mean anything. Just part of a silly game.” 

Jude exhaled the breath they didn’t realise they’d been holding. “Yeah. Right.” 

Yaz gave them a small smile. “Cool. Mind if I go get all this makeup off my face?” 

Jude nodded. “Course.” 

Yaz made her way to the bathroom, and Jude went to grab her the NASA t-shirt and ratty boxer briefs that had somehow become Yaz’s pajamas whenever she stayed the night. They took the clothes to the bathroom, setting them on the toilet lid before grabbing their toothbrush. 

It was comforting, this routine that they had when Yaz stayed over. 

Jude really liked it when Yaz stayed over. 

They watched as Yaz removed her lipstick, not even realising that they’d stopped brushing until Yaz raised her eyebrow at them. Blushing furiously (and not really sure why), they finished brushing their teeth and went back to their bedroom to get changed into their own pajamas before climbing into bed. 

Only a few minutes later, Yaz came in, her hair hanging loose and wavy around her shoulders from where it had been braided all day. Jude’s mouth went dry as they stared at her. It was nothing they hadn’t seen before, so why was it tonight that everything seemed to be making their head spin? Had the kiss really thrown them that off-balance? Maybe they’d just had one too many drinks at the party. Maybe this was how everyone was after their first kiss. 

“Why’re you -” 

“You’re really pretty,” Jude blurted out, interrupting whatever question Yaz had been about to ask. 

Yaz blinked at them a couple of times. “How drunk are you?” 

“M’not that drunk,” Jude grumbled. “You drank just as much as I did.” 

Yaz hummed. “Well. Thanks.” 

Jude watched as Yaz walked over and climbed into bed beside them, their heart starting to beat a little faster. Had their bed always felt this small? 

“Can you turn off the light?” Yaz asked, and Jude nodded. 

The moment the light was off, it was like the air was electrified. Jude had never been so aware of how close Yaz was, how little space existed between them. Swallowing hard, they turned towards her, hardly daring to breathe when they found her looking right back at them. 

Was it the moonlight that made everything feel like a dream, Jude wondered? It made Yaz’s skin glow, her eyes shine. She’d always been beautiful - Jude wasn’t blind - but never before had they ever dared to think about touching her the way they wanted to right now. Their gaze dropped to Yaz’s lips, as if of their own accord, and they licked their lips nervously. 

Yaz’s eyes widened, and Jude wondered what it was she saw on their face. Jude wasn’t even sure what she might have found, not really. 

They almost felt like they were in a trance as they leaned forward, gaze flickering up to Yaz’s. Yaz’s lips parted, her breath sounding shaky as she nodded. 

Jude pressed their lips to hers, hearing Yaz gasp softly as they deepened the kiss. 

It was as if a dam had broken; all of a sudden, Jude needed more. They needed more of the taste of Yaz’s lips on their own, needed to feel her skin underneath their fingertips. 

Hesitantly, they moved their hand to Yaz’s waist, teasing the hem of her t-shirt and hearing Yaz inhale sharply as their fingertips brushed against her skin. Emboldened, Jude let their hand slide up even further, shuddering into Yaz’s mouth as their thumb grazed the side of her breast. 

Yaz pulled back from their kiss and Jude froze, their eyes wide. Yaz was breathing heavily as she stared at Jude before slowly sitting up. Jude let their hand fall, ready to apologise before Yaz suddenly lifted off her shirt, tossing it to the side. 

Jude’s tongue instinctively darted out to wet their lips as they sat up, taking Yaz in. Dusky nipples stood to attention, and Jude couldn’t help but lean forward and put their mouth on one. Yaz moaned, her hand moving to wind in Jude’s hair as they sucked. 

After a few moments, they switched sides, feeling the heat between their legs grow as Yaz pressed her chest further into Jude’s mouth. 

When Jude finally pulled back, Yaz swallowed hard, holding Jude’s gaze as she laid back down. Jude followed her, holding themselves up with one hand as they began kissing her deeply while using the other hand to roam up and down her body. Yaz was so soft, so warm, and Jude felt like they would never be able to get enough of her. 

They traced their finger along the inside of her thigh, their throat going dry at the hitch in Yaz’s breath and the way she spread her legs a bit wider. Hesitantly, they brushed their fingers over her underwear, swallowing Yaz’s shuddering breath. Jude could already feel the heat radiating from her core, could feel the dampened state of the flimsy fabric. 

They pulled back, chest heaving as they looked at Yaz, waiting. 

“Please,” Yaz whispered, and Jude swallowed hard. 

They slowly slid their hand beneath the waistband of her boxers, through trimmed wiry curls into the wet heat of her. 

“Oh, fuck ,” they breathed, and Yaz whimpered. 

It wasn’t like Jude had never masturbated before; they knew, theoretically, what to expect. But nothing could have prepared them for the feeling of Yaz, so slick and warm beneath their fingers. They started kissing at her neck, the smell of coconut shampoo and something intrinsically Yaz nearly overwhelming them. 

When they found her clit, her hips jerked forward underneath them, and Jude let out a shuddering breath as they started rubbing slow circles around it. 

“ God, yes, please, a little faster - just like that, yes ,” Yaz panted, and Jude couldn’t stop the moan that escaped them at the quiet praise. 

After a few minutes, they let their finger drift downwards, pressing at Yaz’s entrance. 

“Can I -” they started, their voice sounding huskier than usual as they pulled back to look at Yaz. 

“Yes,” Yaz said quickly. “Please, I need you.” 

Jude’s breath caught in their throat for a second, and they felt a brief pang in their chest at Yaz’s words. Suddenly unable to hold her wide-eyed gaze any longer, they brushed aside the strange feeling and kissed her as they slowly slid one finger inside, determined to give Yaz the release she so clearly craved. 

Yaz moaned into their mouth, and Jude was sure they’d never feel anything like this again as long as they lived. Time seemed to disperse around them as they began to finger her in earnest, Yaz growing wetter with every thrust. 

“More, please, I need -” Yaz broke off as Jude added another finger, marveling at how tight and hot Yaz felt around them. It was almost overwhelming, all the sensations they were experiencing - but the sounds of pleasure that Yaz was making as Jude fucked her spurred them on. 

“Jude, I’m - I’m so close,” Yaz said breathlessly, trembling underneath them. “Can you - fuck - can you go to my clit again?” 

Jude immediately withdrew their fingers, moving back upwards to her clit. Yaz was breathing heavily, rutting against Jude’s hand as they watched her in wonder. She had never looked so beautiful as she did right now, and suddenly Jude wanted nothing more than to see the look on her face when she came. 

“Don’t stop, god , don’t stop,” Yaz moaned, and Jude pushed past the ache in their wrist, desperate to push Yaz over the edge. 

With a shuddering breath, Yaz’s legs clamped around Jude’s hand, her back arching underneath them as she came. They slowed their movements, coming to a stop as Yaz’s body started to relax, her legs releasing their hold on Jude’s hand. 

Her eyes slowly started to flutter open, her chest still heaving slightly as she stared wide-eyed at Jude. For a moment, Jude just stared back. 

What have I just done?  

Suddenly feeling rather awkward, Jude removed their hand, reaching for a tissue on their bedside table and cleaning off their fingers. They tossed the tissue into the bin before starting to get back underneath the duvet. 

“Don’t you…” Yaz started hesitantly, and Jude froze as their eyes flickered back upwards to meet hers. “I mean. I could return the favour, you know. If you wanted.” 

Jude’s throat went dry, and they licked their lips nervously even as they felt a rush of heat between their legs. They’d certainly gotten worked up, their body aching for its own release, but - “You don’t have to. I don’t want you to feel obligated or anything.” 

An unreadable expression flickered across Yaz’s face. “I want to,” she finally said. “If you’re okay with that.” 

Jude swallowed hard, nodding. 

Yaz shifted forward, pressing her lips to theirs. She kissed them slowly, deeply, until Jude couldn’t remember anything but the taste of Yaz’s tongue in their mouth. 

When Yaz finally pulled back, Jude’s head was spinning. Whether it was from the alcohol or Yaz’s kiss, they weren’t sure - and they couldn’t find it in them to care. 

“Lay down for me?” Yaz murmured, and Jude immediately complied. She leaned over them, pressing hot open-mouthed kisses down their neck as one hand moved to cup their breast over their shirt. 

Jude shifted uncomfortably, and Yaz immediately removed her hand. “No?” she asked softly as she looked up at Jude, nothing but genuine concern in her eyes. 

Jude felt their heart skip a beat at how well Yaz could understand them, even in a situation the two had never found themselves in before. 

Even though this didn’t mean anything, even if they pretended it never happened when the morning came, they were glad Yaz was their first. 

“Yeah, I don’t think so,” Jude said nervously. 

“That’s okay,” Yaz said reassuringly. “Do you still want to -” 

“Yes,” Jude said quickly. “Please.” 

Yaz licked her lips, and Jude swallowed hard. 

“Can I taste you?” she asked, her voice sounding more hoarse than usual. 

Jude nodded, trembling. 

Yaz grabbed a pillow, motioning for Jude to lift their hips and sliding the pillow underneath them. 

“Can I?” she asked, fingers drifting towards Jude’s pajama shorts. In response, Jude lifted their hips again, letting Yaz take off their shorts and underwear in one go. 

They fought the urge to close their legs, suddenly feeling very self-conscious and vulnerable as Yaz’s gaze dropped to their cunt. 

They watched Yaz’s tongue dart out to wet her lips as she slowly ran a finger through Jude’s folds, causing them to inhale sharply. She pulled her finger away and looked at it with a wondrous expression, Jude’s arousal glistening in the moonlight. She brought her finger to her mouth, eyes closing as she wrapped her lips around it. 

When she opened her eyes, all Jude could see was desire. Their body tensed in anticipation as Yaz lowered herself between their legs, her breath ghosting against Jude’s cunt as she looked up at them. 

“Please,” Jude breathed, their heart pounding in their chest. 

At the first swipe of Yaz’s tongue, Jude clenched the sheets in their hands, a moan escaping them. 

Yaz ate them out like she was dying of thirst and Jude was her only supply of water. Just when Jude thought they knew what to expect, Yaz would switch things up, going from circling their clit with a pointed tongue to licking broadly up and down the length of them. When she sucked on their clit, one of their hands flew to her head, gripping her hair more tightly than they meant to. Yaz, for her part, didn’t seem to mind, instead moaning into Jude’s cunt and mouthing at them with renewed fervour. 

Jude wondered if they should feel embarrassed at how quickly they were close to coming, but couldn’t find it in them when Yaz’s tongue felt so good and her fingers were digging into their thighs and - 

“Oh, fuck, Yaz ,” Jude cried out as they rutted against her face, their orgasm hitting them like a tidal wave. 

Yaz slowed her movements, gently easing Jude through their orgasm. By the time she pulled away, Jude was simply staring at the ceiling, trying to remember how to breathe properly. 

A few moments later, they sensed Yaz laying down beside them and rolled over to face her. 

They looked at each other in silence, and Jude struggled to think of what they should say. What was there to say when you’d just hooked up with the person who’d been your best friend for the last decade? 

“Good night, Jude,” Yaz said softly, and Jude let out the breath they didn’t realise they’d been holding. 

“Good night, Yaz,” they murmured, watching as Yaz rolled over to face away from them. Their fingers twitched toward her, and they were surprised to find themselves with the urge to trace the smooth expanse of her back, to pull her close and wrap their arms around her. 

Swallowing hard, they quickly found their underwear and put it back on before turning their back to Yaz, hoping that sleep would take them soon. 

Chapter Text

Jude had only managed to sleep for about four hours or so, waking up with the first hint of sun behind the curtains. Their head was mildly pounding, and they once again vowed that they would never touch a drink as long as they lived. (That, they knew, was a lie, but it wouldn’t stop them from thinking it.) They quietly got up out of bed, careful not to disturb Yaz as they went down to the kitchen. After washing down a paracetamol with a large glass of water, they started pacing the kitchen, thinking about the events that had transpired the night before. 

They’d kissed Yaz. 

More than that, they’d had sex with Yaz. 

Fucking hell, they’d had sex with Yaz. Their best friend for the last decade, the person they turned to for everything. 

And it had been… nice. Good. Brilliant, even. As long as they lived, they knew they’d never forget the look on Yaz’s face when she came, the sounds that she made. 

Was that weird? People probably weren’t supposed to think about their best friend like that. Even if they had hooked up. For all they knew, Yaz would want to forget anything had ever happened. 

But maybe… maybe not. Maybe Yaz had enjoyed herself just as much as they had. 

What the hell were they supposed to do now? 

Rubbing their face in their hands, they sighed deeply before their eyes landed on their laptop. 

Well. No harm in doing a little research, they supposed. 

They stared at the empty search bar for a moment, not even sure what to type in. Eventually, they shrugged, deciding to just type exactly what had happened. 

i slept with my best friend

They didn’t even realise they were holding their breath as they scanned over the first few results. Several reddit posts. An article titled “I slept with my best friend and it was an awful mistake.” 

Jude quickly decided against that one, feeling a wave of nausea roll over them. Instead, they clicked on a Buzzfeed post. 

16 People Who Had Sex With Their Best Friend Are Sharing The Ways It Impacted Their Relationship, And These Stories Range From Happily Ever After To Heartbreak

Well. At least this one had both sorts of endings. 

They wrinkled their nose as they read through the first few stories. One person had mentioned there had always been sexual tension between them and their friend. Jude was sure that wasn’t the case with them and Yaz. Sure, they had also spent a lot of time cuddling throughout the years, but that was a normal thing for friends to do. Yaz felt like their safe space. 

They skimmed over the next couple of stories before coming to one that made their heart drop into their stomach a bit. 

“Well, I can’t say it was worth it. It felt right then, like maybe we realised our friendship built up to this, but afterward, it felt icky.” 

And there it was - one of Jude’s worst fears, now. The night before had somehow felt so true, so honest and raw and real. Would Yaz look at them differently in the cold light of day? Had they irreparably damaged their friendship? They weren’t sure what they’d do if they lost Yaz. 

"We hooked up occasionally for a few years whenever we were both single. We fell in love -- well, I was in love with her, anyway. We kept getting close to dating, but there were complications."

At least that wasn’t the case, Jude mused. They loved Yaz, of course, but there was no way they were in love with her. They’d know if they were, surely. And Yaz obviously wasn’t in love with them - that would be ridiculous. Jude would definitely know if that was the case. 

They kept skimming, their heart stopping when they reached the next-to-last story. 

“We started as friends, then I proposed we be ‘friends with benefits’, although we didn’t have sex until I knew I liked her and wanted her in my life.” 

Well, obviously Jude liked Yaz. They wouldn’t be best friends if they didn’t. And Jude knew they’d want her in their life forever; they’d known since the first time they sat together at lunch back in year 7. 

“Like I’m holding the hand of the woman that I want to be with forever.” 

A funny feeling took root in Jude’s chest, but they quickly ignored it, instead opening up a new tab. 

friends with benefits

It felt silly, almost, researching something like this. They knew the gist, obviously, but something about reading more about it helped them get a better grasp on their thoughts. 

God, they were having too many thoughts. 

They skipped past the first few results about the old rom-com movie, instead clicking on a Wikipedia article. 

“A friends with benefits relationship (FWB or FWBR) is a sexual arrangement between friends that involves recurrent physical intimacy and varies in its formation, outcomes, and attributes.” 

Right. Nothing that Jude hadn’t known before. It wasn’t something they’d thought about a lot, but again, they were familiar with the basic concept. 

They kept skimming, pausing when they came to the section titled “Types of friends with benefits relationships.” 

And there it was. First on the list: “True friends - Close-knit friends who engage in sexual activity with each other.” 

A common enough occurrence, then. 

Jude closed their laptop, their body practically buzzing as their mind raced. Would it really be so out of the realm of possibility that Yaz might want this sort of relationship? Obviously, if she didn’t, Jude would be okay with that. They’d never want Yaz to feel pressured into something, especially something that felt as monumental as this. As long as they had Yaz in their life, they would be happy. 

God, they really needed Yaz to wake up. 

Deciding that they needed something physical to do in order to keep themself from spiraling, Jude got out the ingredients for some pancakes. 

Unfortunately, Jude had forgotten that they were, as Yaz frequently teased, a “disaster in the kitchen”. 

“Bloody hell,” Jude muttered as they burnt yet another pancake. 

Maybe this was a bad idea. Was it weird to make breakfast for someone you’d just had a one-night-stand-that-you-were-kinda-hoping-might-become-more-than-one-night with? 

“Dude, you have got to chill out,” they said under their breath. “It’s just Yaz. You’ve had breakfast together literally so many times.” They sighed. “Right. Talking to myself again. Good sign. Still here.”

Eventually, Jude had managed to produce a few decent pancakes, setting aside the ones that were least burnt for Yaz. They went ahead and got out the lemon and sugar they knew Yaz liked on her pancakes, as well as some Nutella to slather on their own in hopes of making them slightly more edible.  

They’d just finished setting the table when Yaz walked in from the bedroom, looking adorably rumpled and bleary-eyed. 

God, she was beautiful. How long had Jude spent pointedly ignoring that fact? They weren’t sure.  

One thing was for certain - they couldn’t ignore it anymore. 

Now that they were seeing Yaz again for the first time since they’d slept together, Jude knew that something had irrevocably shifted inside of them. No matter what they’d spent the entire morning telling themselves, they’d never truly be able to go back to the way things were. 

Nothing would ever be the same again. 

The question now was: where did they go from here? 

Jude wasn’t sure how long they’d been staring at Yaz before they finally snapped back into their body. 

“I made breakfast,” they blurted out. “Well. I tried to. You know me, not the best in the kitchen. Figured you might be hungry, you know, after last night.” They felt the blood rush to their cheeks. “I mean, you know, because we really only had snacks at Ryan and Tibo’s place. Not the… the other thing. Although I guess that does take up a good bit of energy, doesn’t it?” Fucking hell, why were they still talking? “Anyway, I don’t know, I just -” 

“Jude,” Yaz interrupted, an almost pained expression on her face, and Jude’s mouth snapped shut as they stared at her with wide eyes. “You don’t have to do all this, you know. We can just pretend it never happened.” 

“Oh.” Jude pressed their lips together, nodding slowly and trying to ignore the way their heart dropped into their stomach at the gentle rejection. “Right, course. If that’s what you want.” 

Yaz’s brows furrowed slightly. “Isn’t… isn’t that what you want?” 

Jude gave a slight shrug, shifting anxiously onto the balls of their feet. “I mean… I liked it. Really liked it, actually.” Suddenly, a wave of anxiety and self-consciousness washed over them. “Unless… you didn’t? That would be okay, you know. I know that I… I didn’t really know what I were doing. Don’t know, really. Which I guess you already know. Yeah. You’re right, we can just -” 

“I did.” 

“What?” Jude stopped in their tracks at Yaz’s interjection, their brows furrowing in confusion. 

Yaz’s lips were parted as she stared at Jude, an expression on her face that looked something like… hope? 

“I did,” Yaz repeated. “Enjoy it. A lot.”

“Oh.” Slowly, Yaz’s words sank in, and Jude swallowed hard. “Oh.” 

Yaz let out a quiet laugh, a small smile on her face. “Yeah.”   

Jude’s heart was thumping in their chest so quickly that it almost felt like they had two of them. “Would you… would you maybe want to do it again?” they asked, trying not to stumble too much over their words. 

“You’d want to?” Yaz asked breathlessly. 

Jude nodded shyly. “I’ve been researching all morning. Y’know, like, friends with benefits. It’s actually quite common, apparently.” 

Some flicker of emotion passed across Yaz’s face, gone before Jude had the chance to try and decipher it. “Right,” Yaz said, her voice sounding a little too bright. Jude tilted their head, studying her curiously. “Friends with benefits. We could do that.” 

A smile spread across Jude’s face, and Yaz smiled softly in return. “Ace.” Their brows furrowed. “So, um, what does that mean?” 

Yaz raised an eyebrow. “I thought you said you researched,” she teased. 

“I did,” Jude huffed. “I just mean, like, for us specifically.” 

Yaz shrugged, considering. “I mean, it doesn’t really have to change anything, I guess. You’re still my best mate, yeah?” 

“Course,” Jude said. “And you’re mine. Always.” 

“There we are, then,” Yaz said lightly. “Still best mates who just happen to shag each other sometimes now.” 

Jude scrunched their nose. “It sounds so vulgar when you say it like that.” 

“And how else would you like me to say it? Fuck?” Yaz cocked an eyebrow. “Make love?” 

Something in Jude practically thrummed at Yaz’s words, and they quickly shook their head as if it would make whatever feeling it was dissipate. “Okay. Whatever. Shag is fine.” 

“Great.” The corner of Yaz’s mouth tugged up into a smile. “Anything else?” 

Jude considered. “From what I read, as long as neither of us fall in love with the other, everything will be fine.” They smirked. “Course, if you haven’t fallen for my ruggedly handsome looks and whimsical charm by this point, I’m sure we’ll be fine.” 

“Oh, is ‘charm’ what we’re calling it, now?” Yaz said with an indignant huff. “Not seeing much of that, seeing how apparently there’s not even a chance you’d fall in love with me.” 

For some reason, Yaz’s words made Jude’s heart skip a beat. They gawked at her for a minute, their mouth opening and closing as they tried to figure out what to say. They hadn’t meant to offend Yaz; and after all, anyone would be lucky to love her like that, and it’s not like they couldn’t, it was just that Jude -

“Relax, Jude,” Yaz said, apparently noticing Jude’s growing distress and deciding to have mercy on them. “I’m teasing you.” 

“Oh,” Jude said, breathing a sigh of relief. “Right.” 

Yaz smiled, but there was something in it that didn’t seem quite right. Before Jude could ask about it, Yaz nodded towards the table. “So, how many of these pancakes are actually edible?” 

“Most of them,” Jude said with a huff, scrunching their nose. “And I saved you the nicest ones. Only the best for Yasmin Khan.” 

This time, Yaz’s smile looked more genuine, and Jude felt their cheeks pinken as they both sat down at the table to eat. 

Two friends. Two friends with benefits. Just sitting down, having breakfast, like they had so many mornings before. Like Yaz had said, nothing really had to change. Even if it felt like it had. 

They knew what they were doing, the two of them. Nothing could possibly go wrong.

Right?

Chapter Text

“Hey, where’s the rest of the custard creams?” Jude furrowed their brows at the small bowl of biscuits on Yaz’s nightstand, right next to Yaz’s bag of mini eggs. 

“I hid them,” Yaz said as she pulled up Netflix. “Otherwise you’d eat the whole pack in one go before we even get through the first ten minutes.” 

Jude’s mouth dropped open in faux outrage. “What a heinous accusation.” 

“Am I wrong?” Yaz challenged with a raised brow. 

Jude scrunched their nose. “No.” They smirked. “At least I stay awake the whole time, though.” 

“I don’t always fall asleep.” 

“Sure, sure. You’re just resting your eyes.” 

Yaz stuck her tongue out at them, and Jude grinned before settling in beside her. When the movie started playing, it felt just like old times; just Yaz and Jude, snuggling on Yaz’s bed, eating snacks and watching a cheesy rom-com that they both pretended they were watching ironically. 

The last time they’d watched a movie together, though, they’d never had sex with each other before. 

They’d hung out a few times since Ryan and Tibo’s party a few weeks prior - sometimes with the guys, sometimes alone. Ever since that night, though, even after deciding they could be friends with benefits, nothing had happened between them again. 

At this point, Jude was slowly driving themself crazy thinking about it. Did Yaz regret her decision to say yes and was just hoping that if she never initiated, Jude would forget all about it? Was she waiting for them to initiate? Maybe they’d just dreamed it all. Or they’d astrally projected into a parallel universe. 

But now, here they were, and Jude couldn’t deny that they were a lot more distracted by the feeling of Yaz’s thighs pressed against their own than they used to be. Had Yaz always been this warm? Maybe they should just say something. At least then they’d know. But then, of course, that would mean that they’d know, and - 

Jude didn’t even realise at first when Yaz paused the movie, shifting to face them. “Okay, what’s up? I don’t think you’ve absorbed a single bit of this movie.” 

“What? Course I have,” Jude tried, looking at the screen. “She’s just, um. Isn’t she doing the - the thing?” 

“Jude. I can hear the cogs in your brain spinning,” Yaz said dryly. “Just tell me.” 

“We haven’t had sex again.” Jude’s mouth snapped shut, their eyes widening after the blunt statement escaped them in a rush.

Yaz blinked at them a few times. “No,” she finally said. “We haven’t.” 

“Right.” Jude’s brows furrowed as they pressed their lips together and stared at their twiddling thumbs for a few moments. They took in a deep breath, finally looking back up at Yaz and doing their best to put on what they hoped was a suave, alluring expression. “Do you want to?” 

Yaz raised her eyebrow. “Is this your way of trying to seduce me?” 

“Maybe.” Jude huffed. “I thought I was doing quite well.” 

“Mm. Needs work.” 

Jude scrunched their nose. “I can do better.” 

Yaz looked like she was fighting back a smile. “Yeah?” 

“Mmhmm.” 

Yaz simply gave them an amused expression that said go on, and Jude was suddenly filled with a desperate need to fluster her. 

Their tongue unconsciously darted out to wet their lips, and they noticed Yaz’s gaze flicker down to their mouth. A small smile tugging at the corner of their lips, Jude slowly leaned forward until they could feel Yaz’s breath on them. Right before Yaz moved to meet their lips, they changed direction, pressing a kiss to the underside of Yaz’s jaw and causing the brunette to inhale sharply. 

“Jude,” Yaz said, her voice sounding beautifully strained as Jude continued pressing hot kisses to the side of Yaz’s neck. They noticed Yaz’s legs pressing together, and they couldn’t help the smirk that spread across their face as they kissed what was apparently a very sensitive spot below her ear. 

When they finally pulled back, Yaz was looking at them with a rather dazed expression on her face. Jude raised a cocky brow. “How long do we have before anyone’s back?” 

Yaz blinked a couple of times before glancing at the old alarm clock on her bedside table. “At least an hour.” 

Jude tilted their head suggestively. “Might be long enough.” A bold claim, considering this was only going to be their second time having sex, but Jude reckoned that it was sounding confident that was the key. They hoped they sounded confident, anyway, rather than the completely-out-of-their-league that they felt. 

Yaz rolled her eyes, but a smile spread across her face anyway. “Alright, bighead. Just because you -” 

Jude leaned forward, finally pressing their lips to Yaz’s and feeling quite smug at the soft sound of surprise Yaz let out before she quickly reciprocated. 

It was surprisingly easy to lose themselves when they kissed Yaz, Jude found; before they realised what they were doing, they had Yaz on her back, hovering over her as they started kissing her neck again. The sudden urge to explore every inch of Yaz’s body was so strong that it took Jude by surprise; they’d never felt anything like this before. 

Unfortunately, they remembered, they were on a bit of a time crunch. 

Next time. The thought sent a thrill down Jude’s spine and straight to their core, and they smiled as they quickly made their way down Yaz’s body, kissing her over her clothes and relishing the way Yaz squirmed the closer they got to her underwear.

Remembering how good it had felt to have Yaz’s tongue between their legs, Jude slipped their fingers into the waistband of Yaz’s underwear, looking up at her for permission.
“Please,” Yaz breathed, and Jude tugged down her jeans and knickers. It was a bit awkward, and they both laughed when the jeans got stuck on Yaz’s ankles. The tension in the air quickly thickened again, though, the moment that Jude laid down in between Yaz’s legs. With a nervous flutter in their stomach, Jude leaned forward - and swallowed hard. 

Oh no.

Yaz didn’t smell bad, but the scent was overwhelming. Anxiety churned in their gut; they didn’t want Yaz to feel embarrassed or ashamed if they couldn’t do this. 

They gave a tentative lick, and both the feeling and taste of Yaz’s arousal on their tongue was another odd sensation. Again, it wasn’t Bad, and knowing that they had drawn that from her made them feel even more turned on themself, but it was Different and still a lot to process. 

Apparently, they’d hesitated for too long, because Yaz’s voice jerked their attention back to the present moment. “Jude? You okay?” 

“Yeah!” Jude chirped immediately, lifting their head up to look at her. Judging by the look on Yaz’s face, though, they hadn’t fooled her one bit. 

“Hey,” Yaz said gently. “Talk to me.” 

Jude pressed their lips together, swallowing hard as they dropped their gaze. “It’s just,” they started, a self-directed huff of exasperation escaping them as they fought to find the words. “I don’t - I -”

“If you don’t want to, Jude, that’s okay,” they heard Yaz say softly. 

“No!” Jude’s head snapped up, their eyes widening. “I do. Want to. So badly. It’s just - I don’t know, it’s so different and I don’t want you to think that you smell bad or that it’s anything to do with you, cause it’s not, it’s just so much and -”

“Jude,” Yaz interrupted. “Breathe.” 

Jude obeyed, letting out all their air in a deep sigh. “I’m sorry,” they said, a wave of shame rolling over them. 

“Hey.” Yaz’s voice was kind, but firm. “None of that. You’ve nothing to be sorry for.”

“I feel stupid.” Jude’s admission was barely more than a mumble. “And selfish.” 

“Selfish?” Yaz frowned. 

“Because you did… that,” Jude said, scrunching their nose. “To me. I should be able to do that for you, too.” 

Yaz’s face softened. “It’s not a transaction, Jude. You don’t owe me anything.” 

“I know, but -” Jude let out a frustrated huff. “But I want to.” 

Yaz pressed her lips together, considering. “I mean, if you really want to, maybe we could try a dental dam or something? I don’t know, maybe having some sort of barrier in between might help.” 

Jude’s eyes widened. “Do you think so? Do you have any we could try now?” 

Yaz shook her head. “No, but we could get some.” She considered. “Or maybe…” She got up out of bed, walking over to her dresser. Jude tried their best not to ogle, but god did Yaz have a nice arse. Should they tell her that? Probably not. 

They were so caught up in staring at Yaz’s arse that they weren’t able to avert their gaze by the time Yaz turned around. Caught, they looked up at Yaz, who was watching them with a raised brow. Jude could feel their cheeks pinkening, and their mouth opened and closed like a fish. 

“Admiring the view?” Yaz asked teasingly. 

Jude shrugged, trying to play it cool (and failing miserably, they were sure). “Maybe.” Trying to change the subject, they nodded towards the object in Yaz’s hand. “Whaddaya got there?” 

“A condom.” Yaz went to her desk, grabbing some scissors. “Would probably work pretty much the same, I’d think? We can cut it open to make it more like a square, just so you can try it and see if it would even work. These are even strawberry flavoured. Dunno if that might make it better or worse.” Yaz had an almost sheepish expression on her face. “Only if you want to, though.”

“I’m good to try,” Jude said with a grin. “Strawberry flavoured, huh?” 

Yaz wrinkled her nose. “Made it slightly better when I were with Danny.” 

The mention of Yaz’s ex-boyfriend sent a strange feeling through Jude, and they tried not to scowl. “I never liked Danny.” 

“I know,” Yaz said wryly. Her face grew more serious as she tilted her head. “Never understood why, though.” 

Jude shrugged. They hadn’t fully understood it, either, honestly. But that hadn’t changed the fact that they’d been very grateful when Yaz had finally broken things off with him. “He just wasn’t good enough for you.” No one ever would be, really, Jude thought, but especially not him. Yaz deserved the entire world; Danny Biswas wouldn’t even give her flowers on her birthday. 

Yaz hummed, apparently deciding to let the subject drop as she cut open the condom. “Um, here you go,” she said, handing it to Jude and sitting on the edge of the bed. She shifted nervously, her hands wringing in her lap until Jude laid their hand over hers.

“Lay back down for me?” Jude requested, feeling their own anxiety start up again. 

Yaz nodded, her lips parting as she got back into her original position. Jude also got comfortable between her legs, placing the condom over Yaz’s vulva and holding it in place. It wasn’t the sexiest position, Jude mused, but they didn’t think Yaz would care very much. 

They leaned in slowly, breathing in. The strawberry was a bit intense, but it was at least something more familiar and easier to process. 

They gave an experimental lick up the length of her, a shiver going down their spine at the soft moan that immediately escaped Yaz. 

“Does that feel good?” Jude asked, looking nervously up at Yaz. 

“So good,” Yaz said breathlessly. “Fuck, Jude. Is - is it okay for you?” 

Jude nodded. “Yeah. Yeah, I think so.” Galvanised at Yaz’s response, they gave another lick, this time increasing the pressure. 

“Oh, fuck.” Yaz’s hips canted upwards, and Jude felt a surge of determination. They thought back to the night they’d first had sex, remembering that Yaz had seemed to really enjoy Jude circling her clit. For a moment, they were a bit flummoxed - it was a little harder to find with the layer of latex between them. Eventually, they succeeded - or at least, they assumed they had by the whimper that Yaz let out. 

As they ate Yaz out, their confidence grew - and so did their own arousal. They found themselves unconsciously alternating between dry humping the bed and squeezing their thighs together, already close to coming just from hearing Yaz’s own pleasure. 

“I’m gonna come,” Yaz panted, her movements growing more erratic as one of her hands flew to Jude’s head, winding in their hair. “Oh, god, I’m gonna come. Don’t stop, Jude, please don’t -” 

Yaz broke off in a strangled cry, her thighs tightening around Jude’s head. As if in response to Yaz’s own orgasm, Jude came as well, shuddering as they felt their cunt clench around nothing. 

Well. That had certainly never happened before. 

They lifted their head, wiping their mouth with the back of their hand as Yaz released her grip on their hair. 

“Fuck, I’m so sorry,” Yaz said, her brows furrowing. “I didn’t mean to -”

“S’fine,” Jude said quickly, feeling their cheeks flush. “I, uh, didn’t mind.” 

“Yeah?” Yaz asked, a hint of flirtation mixed with genuine concern. When Jude nodded, she bit her lower lip as her gaze dragged up and down Jude’s body. “Do you want me to…” 

Jude felt their face grow even more red. “Actually.” They shifted, feeling sheepish. “I kind of already, um, did.” 

Yaz tilted her head, raising a brow. “Did what?” 

God, could the floor just open up and swallow them, already? “It were just - I mean - the sounds you made were so hot and I just -” Jude let out a huffed breath, completely flustered. “I’m sorry, I wasn’t trying to, it just -” 

“Jude,” Yaz interrupted, and Jude was surprised at the look of pure hunger on Yaz’s face. “Don’t ever apologise for that. It’s actually kind of really hot.” 

“Really?” Jude scrunched their nose. 

“Really,” Yaz affirmed.  

“And I… I was okay?” Jude asked nervously. “You enjoyed that?” 

“Yes.” Yaz sat up enough to take Jude’s hand in her own, and Jude nearly shivered at both the touch and the earnestness in Yaz’s eyes. “Very much so.” 

“Oh.” Jude felt a flutter in their chest, and they let out a pleased hum. “Ace.” 

For a moment, they simply stared at each other; Jude wasn’t really sure what else to say. Just as they were about to suggest finishing the movie, they heard the sound of footsteps coming down the hall. “Yaz? I’m back early!” The sound of Najia Khan’s voice getting closer sent Jude’s heart racing.

 Yaz’s eyes widened. “Fuck,” she breathed. “Where’s my - oh shit, the condom - where’s my underwear?” 

Jude jumped up, grabbing Yaz’s discarded clothes and tossing them to her before taking the condom and putting it in the rubbish bin. Yaz seemed to quickly realise that she wasn’t going to have time to get her jeans on, so she threw the duvet over herself and the clothes. Jude clambered back on to the bed with her, hoping that their face wasn’t anywhere near as red as it felt. 

Not a moment too soon, apparently, as the door to Yaz’s bedroom opened. 

“Mum, I’ve told you a billion times -” 

“Yaz, dear -” Najia started, completely ignoring Yaz’s complaint. “Oh, hi, Jude! I didn’t realise you were here.” 

“Hiya, Yaz’s mum!” 

“Jude, you’ve been coming over here for over a decade. I’ve told you, you’re allowed to call me Najia.” 

“Right,” Jude said sheepishly. “Forgot.” 

Najia hummed, clearly not believing them. “Are you staying for tea, then? I’m making curry.” 

“Can I?” Jude asked, looking hopefully at Yaz. 

“Course you can,” Yaz said, as if it was the silliest question ever asked. “Just maybe don’t try to keep up with Dad again when it comes to the spice level.” 

“I were fine,” Jude said with a pout, knowing exactly what instance Yaz was referring to. And they had been fine - after they’d drank nearly an entire carton of the Khans’ milk. They’d had to go with Yaz to the shops after dinner to get more. 

“Your face turned a shade of red previously unknown to man,” Yaz said dryly. “Pretty sure I saw steam coming out of your ears, too.” 

Jude scrunched their nose. “Whatever.” They turned back to Najia, who was looking between the two of them with an expression on her face that Jude couldn’t exactly read. Whatever it was, though, Najia seemed happy. “I’d love to stay for tea.” 

“Great. You two can set the table in, say, twenty minutes?” 

Jude nodded enthusiastically. “Sure thing, Yaz’s - Najia.” 

Najia smiled. “See, Yaz? I’m glad someone around here doesn’t complain about helping out.” 

Yaz rolled her eyes, and Jude grinned as Najia went back to the kitchen, closing the door behind her. “Hear that? I think I’m the favourite.” 

“Shut up.” Yaz lightly punched them in the arm. “Or I won’t tell you where I hid the rest of the custard creams.” 

Jude gave a half-shrug. “That’s okay,” they said, a sly smile spreading across their face as they leaned closer to Yaz. “I’ve already had dessert today, anyway.” 

“Nope.” 

“What?” 

“Please never speak again.” 

“But I’m such a comedian.” 

“You’re a menace is what you are.” 

“Yeah, but you still love me.” Yaz’s breath hitched, and Jude’s eyes widened a bit as they realised what they said. Why was their heart racing a bit? They’d been best friends for years; they’d said ‘I love you’ or some version thereof so many times before. 

So why did the air suddenly feel so… weighted? 

“Yeah, yeah,” Yaz said with a laugh that sounded a little too forced. “C’mon, bighead. Let’s go see if Mum needs help.” 

Jude smiled weakly as Yaz got up to get dressed, wondering just what else between them was going to change.