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1.
“I’m still of the opinion that you should take a unit of men with you, Commander” Varel said with a frown for at least the hundredth time that day as he was walking Gerod and his wardens to the front gate of the Keep.
“Yes, you’ve said so, Varel. But we’re wardens, let us handle this” Gerod replied, shaking his head again as he led Nathaniel, Oghren, and Anders outside the Vigil’s gates. His tone was a mix of exasperation and resolve—he’d had this same argument so many times, he was eager to get moving before it dragged on further. As fond of Varel as he was, he was an experienced warden, not a child to be fussed over.
“So you’ve said. But it’s still only three fresh recruits” Varel’s frown deepened as he kept pace beside the commander. “You’re walking into an unknown situation with barely more than a handful of men. That’s reckless.”
Gerod sighed as he paused, then glanced over his shoulder - his men were keeping their distance, giving them some privacy at Nathaniel’s urging. He was already giving Oghren and Anders a subtle look, warning them to stay back, the disciplined soldier in him clearly taking hold. Gerod appreciated Nathaniel’s sense of order and duty, and despite how they had started, he suspected the two of them would soon get along very well.
“Two wardens were enough to end a Blight in a year, Seneschal, the four of us can deal with a patrol” Gerod shook his head with a sigh, his voice steady, as he turned to Varel. His expression was firm but not unkind. “May I remind you, I also have nearly two decades of experience being a soldier, and over a decade of that was as a warden.”
“I know, Commander” Varel sighed in defeat, his concern still visible in his eyes but there was also an air of defeat in the way the tension left his shoulders. “But after the attempt at your life, I’ve ample cause to worry.”
“Thank you, Seneschal” Gerod said, his voice softer than before, and he moved a bit closer to the man. “It’s touching you care so much for my safety. I’ll forever owe you for taking that crossbow bolt for me, you risked yourself-”
“There’s no need-”
“There absolutely is” Gerod interrupted Varel with a firm voice. “You saved my life. But the conspiracy has been exposed, and those who would’ve liked to see me dead are either dead themselves or are locked up safely. As for the darkspawn, they are the wardens’ burden.”
“You’re a difficult man to argue with” Varel rubbed his eyes in exasperation.
“You’re telling me” Gerod laughed as he straightened up, his hands clasped behind his back. “I’m not used to people wanting to protect me so much. It’s a nice sentiment, even if it’s misplaced. I should be the one to do the protecting.”
“You’re my arl now, I’m here to serve you and keep you safe” Varel said in a defeated voice.
“I know, and believe me, I’m not rushing my end” Gerod smiled and leaned forward slightly. “But maybe… after I return, we could have a drink. A proper celebration, perhaps? I have a fine bottle of Antivan brandy in my room. Nothing like good company to celebrate our successes.”
“If you’d like, Commander” Varel said with a polite, measured tone and an unreadable expression, then stepped away from Gerod with a resigned sigh. “I won’t keep you from your mission any longer.”
With that, Varel turned and walked back inside the Vigil’s imposing walls. Gerod watched him go, a flicker of disappointment crossing his face as he noted the non-committal response he had received before Varel’s departure. He hesitated for a moment, then squared his shoulders, trying to mask the disappointment creeping into his expression. Turning around slowly, he pushed any personal thoughts out of his mind as he faced his men, who were ready and waiting, and led them towards their goal.
2.
Varel barged inside the silent infirmary with panic on his face. The healer on duty gave him a dirty look but he was ignored as Varel strode over to where Gerod was sitting on a bed.
“Commander, I heard you were injured!”
“A bit, yes” Gerod looked up at Varel from where was propped up against the wall with a pillow behind his head and only wearing his pants, no shirt or boots. “Nothing serious, but I’m touched you came.”
“Of course I came! I thought-” Varel stopped short as he took a good look at the commander and realized that he did appear mostly unharmed. With a relieved sigh, Varel sat down on the chair beside the bed. “I thought your life was in danger. It’s a relief to see that you’re well.”
“I was in good hands” Gerod gave the healer standing across the room a smile and a playful wink, but received only a huff and a glare as an answer. Gerod sighed – he really missed Anders, he was the only fun person in the Vigil. “But I do have a nice slash here” Gerod indicated the bandages on his right side, and turned to Varel with a charming smile. “We could compare scars later if you’d like.”
“I still don’t find it as amusing as you do” Varel sighed, eyeing the bandages that covered what appeared to be a long wound above his right hip. It must have been left by a sword dodged just in the nick of time. “Maker, Commander, if that blade gets you a bit more to your left-”
“But it didn’t” Gerod interrupted Varel. “I jumped away, received a small slice, and I’m all good.”
Varel gave him a look, clearly unimpressed.
“You’re lucky that sword missed anything important, commander. You’ve got a knack for flirting with danger, but next time, try to avoid any close calls with death.”
“Oh, come on, Varel, I’ve been much closer to death than this” Gerod shrugged and moved his arms, putting his hands behind his head, flexing his muscles a bit, just enough to make Varel’s gaze linger, then grinned at the other. “I’ve only got a slight nick, everyone came back in one piece, and I have you fussing over me. What more could I ask for?”
“Maybe be glad I’m worried about you” Varel sighed with an exasperated look on his face as he leaned back and crossed his arms.
“Oh, I am, Varel, I’m very happy to have you here” Gerod smiled at him. “And since I’ve come back in one piece after defeating so many darkspawn, maybe I’ve earned that drink we discussed the other day? To celebrate my safe return?”
Before Varel could answer, the healer stopped at the foot of the bed and glared at Gerod.
“I’ve said no alcohol while you’re taking the potions, Commander! I will shackle you to the bed if you can’t be trusted with your own health.”
“Am I not your arl? I distinctly remember being reminded of that fact” Gerod leaned back against the wall with a mock-hurt expression and sneaked a glance at Varel, curious about his reaction.
The healer looked at him with a deadpan expression.
“A dead arl is no arl, so you better listen to me.”
With that, he walked away, leaving the commander and Varel alone in the infirmary.
“He is right, Commander. You should take your health seriously” Varel said with badly concealed amusement in his voice.
“Well, I do take it seriously, especially when it gets you here by my side. But maybe I could use some further incentive” Gerod smiled at him. “That brandy isn’t going anywhere, you know.”
“That does sound like good motivation” Varel nodded, amusement now plain to see on his face, and stood up from his chair. “Get better, then we can come back to the topic.”
Then with a nod, Varel walked out of the infirmary to return to his duties.
3.
It had been a long day for Varel.
Ever since the darkspawn attack, repairs were being made on the Vigil, but some things were taking longer than expected. While the walls held against the attack, a lot of wooden buildings were burned to the ground, and with them, many tools necessary for daily life, too. These had to be replaced, too, but with Amaranthine attacked as well, they had to be brought in from further away, which meant all the more waiting. Varel had been in the courtyard all day, coordinating the people rebuilding the Vigil, so it didn’t all fall on the shoulders of Voldrik. He was but one man, too, and Varel had also been in the Vigil far longer than almost anyone.
With a sigh, Varel let his dirty clothes fall to the ground of the officers’ bathroom and climbed into the tub of steaming water that had been prepared for him. He sighed when the warm water enveloped him and started to ease the tension in his muscles, the pain morphing into a dull ache while he rested, his head back against the edge of tub. The water was scented, too, with a type of rose that was in fashion in Orlais – it was probably the Commander who ordered it, he preferred the flowery oils to the simple soaps most people used. It did have its perks, Varel thought to himself as he relaxed in his bath, to be the seneschal. Despite how it appeared when he had to deal with particularly difficult nobles.
Varel took a deep breath, then slid down under the water and ran his fingers through his hair, letting the water run through the strands. When he came up, he slicked his wet hair back before leaning his head back against the edge of the tub once more. His hair too felt dirty and greasy after a long day of sweating under the sun. While he himself hadn’t done any building per se, he had been running along the length of the courtyard all day, showing people where to do what, and occasionally helped carry whatever needed carrying. It took a lot out of him, more than it used to, but he wasn’t getting any younger, and an unfortunate side effect of that was being exhausted after running around in the sun all day.
The warm water slowly relaxed his tense muscles, the aches abating as he enjoyed his bath. He let himself relax, eyes closed, and he wasn’t sleeping, only reveled in the calm comfort the water provided. He heard the door to the room open behind him but didn’t pay it much attention. He didn’t expect that he’d be alone for long but didn’t mind until he wasn’t disturbed. He supposed it was Garevel, he should have also been done with the soldiers by now, and marching around in the dust all day would warrant a priority trip to the bath. He didn’t care enough to open his eyes to see, just let his head stay back against the tub, his arms propped on the side, and enjoyed the warm water around his body. He heard the other person moving around and getting ready for their bath. He heard an armor being removed and put on the bench, then the rustling of clothing.
“How are the new recruits? Making any progress with them?” he asked, because Garevel had been complaining about the newest recruits not knowing which end of the sword they should be on.
“Oh, I see how it is, it’s all work and no play with you, even here?”
The voice that answered was most definitely not Garevel.
Varel sat up in the tub and turned to look at the Commander, who was now naked, so he quickly turned away again.
“Forgive me, Commander, I thought it was Garevel” Varel said as he settled back into the tub, now less comfortably than before.
“Figured, since I have no rookies anymore” Gerod said in an amused voice. “I’d also say Garevel is not making enough progress with them, judging by the way he’s still making them run laps around the Keep.”
Varel sighed – he knew they were young and not especially gifted… but they seemed enthusiastic enough.
“I fear Garevel’s patience wears thin if they don’t start showing results soon, and he’ll lose his temper with them. We do need competent soldiers” Varel said in a tired voice.
“You are always free to help him if you think that would net results. I can also lend a few wardens, maybe learning from them would help. Although- not Oghren. We don’t need the poor recruits running away in horror” Gerod chuckled and walked over to another prepared tub, then got in. Varel turned away and did not look at the Commander’s muscular backside. “The others can keep things under control while you’re busy with them, I’m sure.”
“I’ll see what I can do” Varel said as he considered the options. He himself had trained countless soldiers for the Vigil, perhaps it would be wise for him to take some time and help Garevel. “Perhaps a more direct approach is needed. A warden would surely help as well, both awe and fear at being trained by a famed warrior.”
“Exactly my thinking” Gerod said with a smile, then disappeared under the surface of the water. When he next came up, he shook his head to get rid of some of the water, then leaned back against the tub while lifting his legs and letting them dangle off the sides.
Varel looked away.
“I’ll catch up on the rebuilding efforts tomorrow and see what I can help with, to give you more free time” Gerod continued, his eyes closed as his head rested against the edge of the tub. “I know I’ve not been helping enough around the Keep lately, but now that there should really be no more darkspawn on the surface, I should have more time. I also haven’t replied to a single letter in two weeks. Mistress Woolsey will have my head.”
Varel winced in sympathy.
“That might be true” Varel conceded in a sympathetic tone. “But you’re doing well, Commander, keeping the people all around the arling safe, and actually caring about their fates. You’re the best arl this place could have asked for.”
“That’s sweet of you to say, Varel, but it’s truly because of your work around the Keep” Gerod said in an uncharacteristically serious voice. Well, that was unfair of Varel – the Commander could be serious when the circumstances demanded it, it had just been that around Varel, he hadn’t been too serious lately. “I would be lost around the nobility and the administrative work if not for you and Woolsey. I can organize defenses, patrols, and train soldiers if I had the time, but run an arling? Sometimes I wonder if the First Warden meant this as a punishment, or if he was a seer and had a vision about all the bullshit that happened last year.”
“I’m sure the First Warden knew what he was doing when he chose you. You’re a very talented man who inspires the people around him, no matter who they are. And I think I can speak for Woolsey and Garevel that it’s an honor for us to work with you” Varel said softly. “You shouldn’t be so hard on yourself, Commander. What you’re doing isn’t easy. But enough work for tonight, try to enjoy your bath and relax.”
“Would you like to help with that, Varel?” Gerod turned towards Varel with a grin.
Well, at least the teasing meant he was feeling better.
“I do also think you perfectly capable of having a bath alone” Varel rolled his eyes and stood up, turning his back towards the Commander as he reached for his towel. He stepped out of his bath and quickly dried his chest and back, then wrapped the towel around his waist.
“Capable and willing are two different things” Gerod laughed. “I could also always use a helping hand. Or lend one. But I can make do with only enjoying the sights.”
Varel shook his head as he walked over to his clothes and finished toweling, then began to put on his clothes.
“Your sense of humor reminds me more and more of Anders, Commander. And I’m not saying that as a good thing” he said but he was laughing a bit, so he knew Gerod wouldn’t take him seriously.
“I’ll try to improve it then to better suit what you find amusing” Gerod replied, his voice light.
“If you say so, Commander” Varel smiled as he finished, then wished the Commander a good night and left the room.
+1
It was late at night in the Vigil, and Varel was sitting in the Commander’s office, with both of them settled comfortably in the armchairs by the fireplace. They were both working in silence, Gerod reading through the accumulated letters of the week from the other arlings, Denerim, Orlais, and Weisshaupt, while Varel was reading a report prepared by Mistress Woolsey about the cost of the repairs, itemized and total. It was not as bad as Varel feared, thanks to the expertise of Voldrik and the donations flooding in from the city of Amaranthine, in all forms, as a thanks for the Commander having protected it.
The fire cast a warm, inviting light over the room and also provided a welcome heat. It was not yet winter, but the autumn nights were getting chillier with the time passing. Varel wished he had had the time to change out of his armor before they settled in to do the paperwork, but alas, this day had been just as busy as all the others this week. His armor was cold, making it a bit uncomfortable to sit around, but it was also nothing he wasn’t used to.
“Sweet Maker” Gerod groaned and leaned back in his chair, head tilted back against the seat.
Varel looked at him expectantly.
“Don’t you just love how we’re still cleaning up after the Blight, and also fighting the usual stragglers that always pop up, but the biggest concern of the Commander of the Grey of Orlais is if I could send an envoy to Empress Celene’s court to show off our Fereldan forces? Is that truly the priority?”
“Well, you are also the arl, Commander” Varel shrugged. “It is to be expected that you have representative duties, on both fronts.”
“Why, Varel, would you like to see me use my Orlesian charms on the Empress?” Gerod grinned at Varel in a way that just made Varel roll his eyes with a fond smile. “I’m afraid I’ve become too Fereldan for that to work. I don’t even have the proper shoes for court, and I haven’t owned a mask in more than a decade.”
“I’m pretty sure those could be arranged in time if you do have to go” Varel commented as he turned back to the letter in his hand.
“Are you so eager to witness me in court? I could always dress up properly just for your sake, too” Gerod said in a suggestive voice as he watched Varel through heavy-lidded eyes.
Varel looked up at him, then quickly turned back to his letter and hoped his cheeks didn’t betray him. He forced his voice into a careful neutrality when answering while trying his best to continue focusing on the letter.
“That won’t be necessary, Commander.”
Varel kept his eyes on the letter, but he heard the commander let out a frustrated sigh. Then suddenly, Gerod was kneeling in front of him, gently pushing the letter out of his way as he looked into Varel’s eyes with determination.
“Varel” Gerod breathed as he put a hand on the seneschal’s thigh, warm and muscular under his palm. “I have no idea how to make myself any clearer to you.”
“I- You’re my arl- And a warden” Varel managed as a weak protest, trying to comprehend what was happening.
“Precisely because of the latter, the first doesn’t matter” Gerod said.
“I don’t think it works that way, Commander” Varel said breathlessly but with a hint of amusement. “You’re also at least twenty years my junior. I could be your father.”
“Please don’t put it that way” Gerod made a face but then looked into Varel’s eyes with determination. “I’m serious about this, Varel. About you. I know I’ve been acting like a bit of a fool lately, but I’m at the end of my rope. I want you. I love you.”
Varel felt as if all the air had been sucked out of the room. He was all too aware that beneath the fondness and admiration he felt for the commander, there was something deeper he tried hard not to acknowledge because it was improper. Because he shouldn’t have had these thoughts or feelings for his arl. But Gerod was here now, a warm hand still on Varel’s thigh, the touch scorching even through his pants, and a desperate longing in his deep blue eyes that were watching him, waiting for an answer.
“While I still don’t think this is smart, Commander” Varel started softly, his resolve weakening. “I too love you.”
He barely got the words out and Gerod was on him, sliding onto his lap, making it work even with both of their armors in the way, then, after a short pause where he looked into Varel’s eyes, giving him one last chance to stop him, leaned forward to kiss him.
It was as sweet as Varel had imagined – Maker, he had, no point in denying it anymore -, even if a bit desperate from both sides. Gerod held onto Varel’s shoulders as if his life depended on it, and Varel wrapped his arms around his waist, their armors clinking awkwardly and the letter he had in his lap crumpling between them. He couldn’t bring himself to care though, as Gerod’s warm lips moved tenderly against his, his stubble rubbing against his skin in a way that made him shiver pleasantly, and he let his hands slide down to Gerod’s hips to pull him closer.
“Maybe we should take this slow, Gerod” Varel said a bit warily as he pulled back, although he himself wasn’t too fond of the idea. “Consider the circumstances and our positions.”
“I’ve been waiting for more than a year” Gerod said, and he absolutely was not whining. “I know what I want, you know what you want. What’s the point in taking it slow?”
For fuck’s sake, Varel was only human, too.
He pulled Gerod into his arms and kissed him desperately. The commander recovered quickly from his surprise and returned the kiss while putting his hands back on Varel’s shoulders, holding onto him. As the kiss deepened, Gerod slid off his lap and tugged Varel along as he stood, leading them towards his bed. The commander had also begun to work on the clasps and fastenings of Varel’s armor, his hands moving as expertly over the armor as if it was his own – Varel wasn’t surprised, with how many years the man had served in the wardens, but his efficiency was still impressive. He pulled back while Gerod removed his chestplate – fortunately, he had removed the gauntlets earlier, they both had, as it was nigh impossible to write in them – and helped him arrange it on the armchair in lieu of a stand. Then wasting no time, he too moved forward to help rid the commander of his own. Gerod was wearing a rather simple chainmail armor this day luckily, as Varel was sure neither of them would have the patience to remove some of the more ornate ones Gerod used for missions.
While Varel deposited the armor on its stand as quickly as he could, Gerod began to rid himself of his greaves. Varel too turned to quickly remove the remaining pieces of his armor, the two of them racing to strip down to only leggings and shirts.
Once Varel was done, he found himself pushed up against the wall, Gerod pressed against his front, their lips meeting in another fervent kiss. He slid a leg between the commander’s thighs, swallowing the surprised moan Gerod let out at that. He felt the commander’s hands on his chest move downwards, over his stomach, to his thighs, then onto his ass. Now it was Varel’s turn to let out a groan and at this point, the only thing left on his mind was getting Gerod naked as soon as possible. He grabbed the hem of the other’s shirt and broke the kiss just enough to pull it over his head. He looked over the commander’s now naked chest in front of him in admiration, and let his hands map it, feeling the hard muscles under his palms. Even though he had seen the man shirtless, even naked, countless times before, this was different.
“You like what you see?” Gerod grinned at him, although his voice wasn’t as confident as usual when he made similarly smart comments.
“Of course I do, you impossible man” Varel shook his head with fond exasperation, then leaned forward to kiss him again. He wasn’t, of course, faced with any resistance. Instead, he felt the warden grip at the edge of his undershirt, dragging it upwards, and he only pulled back until Gerod took it off him, then moved to his neck, trailing his lips down to the man’s chest.
“Well then” Gerod grinned, tilting his head to give Varel access. His hands moved to the waist of his leggings and pushed it down to the ground in one go, revealing that he was naked underneath. Then he reached for the lacing on Varel’s pants, beginning to work them open, too. “Take me to bed, Varel.”
Later, they were lying there together, breathing heavily, and although all of his muscles hurt, Varel felt like he was reborn. He closed his eyes and laughed lightly, breathy and barely making a sound, and he felt young again.
“Was… was it alright?” he heard Gerod ask in a tentative, sheepish voice.
Varel opened his eyes and turned to look at him, laughing at the nervous look he met with.
“I do hope it was more than alright, Gerod” he answered teasingly, and finally the nervousness disappeared from Gerod’s face as he started to join him in laughter, too. Then he pushed himself up on his arms, leaning over Varel.
“Oh, a lot more than alright” he smiled and leaned down for a kiss, placing one hand on Varel’s chest.
“I rather hoped” Varel returned the smile as he pulled Gerod on top of himself, running a hand through the man’s short hair, and kissed him again.
Bonus
As the heavy wooden door swung open with a soft creak, Gerod stepped into their shared bedchamber, his shoulders sagging beneath the weight of a long, exhausting day. The dancing flames of the fireplace cast flickering shadows across the stone walls, making the room warm and inviting. His armor clinked faintly as he removed his gauntlets and kicked off his heavy boots, and with a weary sigh, he sank onto one of the armchairs by the fire, running his fingers through his hair.
Waiting for him in the other armchair was Varel, a book open in his lap as he took in the tired form of his lover. His eyes softened as they met his, and he reached out to place a tender hand upon his arm.
“Long day, I see” Varel said gently. “The new warden recruits giving you any trouble?”
“No, but tracking through the Deep Roads is beginning to become too exhausting” Gerod sighed as he rested his head against the headrest. “Why did the dwarves need so many stairs? My knees are going to kill me tomorrow.”
Varel chuckled in amusement as he laced their fingers together. The room grew silent save for the crackling of the fire and the distant whisper of wind through the Vigil’s stone corridors.
“Let’s go to bed then, darling. Let’s get you out of this heavy armor” Varel said as he nudged Gerod gently, then putting his book on the table between the armchairs, he stood up, pulling Gerod with him.
The Commander let him, but when they stopped before his armor stand, he instead pulled Varel against himself and hugged him. Gerod rested his head against Varel’s shoulder and closed his eyes, then enjoyed the warm arms that came up around him in an embrace.
“Just give me a moment, love” he whispered.
“Of course” Varel said softly, a tender smile on his lips.
Gerod breathed in the familiar scent of earth and steel that was Varel, lingering on his skin from the day. The weight of the past hours was melted away by the comfort of Varel’s embrace, his closeness. The silence between them was filled with unspoken understanding, a reassurance that they were there for each other.
After a moment, Gerod slowly pulled back, enough to meet Varel’s gaze with a faint, grateful smile.
“I needed that” Gerod admitted softly, voice thick with emotion. “Thank you, love.”
Varel’s smile grew tender, his eyes shimmering with quiet affection.
“I’m always here for you, dear” he smiled, brushing a stray lock of hair from Gerod’s brow. “No matter how long the day, or how heavy the burden, I’m here.”
Gerod leaned forward and brushed their lips together in a sweet, tender kiss.
“Thank you. Now let me get out of this blasted armor, and we can go to bed.”
Varel nodded and assisted Gerod as he began to remove the many pieces of his armor with expert hands. Once they were finally settled together under the soft covers, lying in each other’s arms comfortably, Gerod closed his eyes and allowed himself to drift into sleep, comforted by the steady beat of Varel’s heart and the knowledge that, no matter what tomorrow might bring, they would face it together.