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A Sinful Visit

Summary:

Lucifer is working on wedding plans with Alastor, Charlie and Akos when they get a visit from a pair of Sins.

And what the heck did Alastor just cough up?

Notes:

*fingers crossed she depicted these two right....*

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

“No, Angel, we are not putting in a stripper pole at the reception location!” Alastor had snapped. Lucifer groaned and rolled his eyes at the spider demon. He was fairly certain Angel was joking but...better to nip that kind of suggestion in the bud before it took root.

He, Alastor, Akos and Charlie had been sitting around the table in the lounge, discussing placements for setting, refreshments and entertainment for the reception, a rough map of the garden on said table. Angel had been at his usual spot on the bar when he made his...uncouth suggestion.

“I was half-kidding, Smiles,” Angel remarked with a shrug.

“It’s the ‘half-kidding’ part I am worried about…,” Alastor was mumbling.

“So who are we going to hire...ask...to help with some of this?” Charlie asked, to get things back on track.

“I’m sure Husker wouldn’t mind helping with the alcohol side of refreshments,” Alastor pointed out.

“Are you ‘volunteering’ me for shit again?” Husk grumbled from his spot behind the bar.

“If he wants to,” Alastor quickly added.

“Better, but count me in anyway.”

“I could ask Beelzebub to handle the rest,” Lucifer remarked. “But stress this a reception not a full blown party. We’d rather our guest be able to, you know, walk home….”

“I’m sure Rosie would be happy to handle any of the more...special dietary requirements,” Alastor put in. “As for entertainment, I can ask Vox to assist me with that.”

“I am so happy you and Vox are getting along again!” Charlie remarked, Alastor chuckling in response, a fond smile on his face.

It was indeed, a good thing, Lucifer agreed. They didn’t have to worry about part of the city being destroyed again due to a spat….

The sound of a portal opening drew their attention. Lucifer looked and immediately recognized the dark blue portal with...dick shaped objects floating within it’s ring.

Sure enough, the Sin of Lust himself, Asmodeus, stepped through followed by the Sin of Gluttony, Beelzebub.

“Aunt Bee! Uncle Ozzie!” Charlie said excitely as she ran to them, both Sins giving her a hug.

“My my, little Princess, it’s been awhile!” Ozzie greeted warmly.

“And it’s good to see you, honey!” Bee said. “We’re here to see your-” She stopped when she saw him approaching. “Oh! There you are Luci!”

“Ozzie! Bee!” Lucifer greeted warmly, giving Bee a hug and Ozzie a fist bump.  “What brings up here to Pride?”

“A mix of social and...intervention of sorts?” Bee said as she looked around the lounge.  “Love the vibes of the new place by the way.”

“Certainly a better place to chill at than before,” Ozzie agreed.  “But seriously, Luci…we may have a…slight issue.”

Lucifer raised a brow.  “Which is?”

“It’s Satan, he has a new obsession,” Bee replied.

“Oh great…what is it?” Lucifer sighed with an eye roll.

“He’s been pinning after your...sibling?” Ozzie replied, sounding uncertain.

“My sib…oooh….” Lucifer was stunned for a moment.  “Well that's…a bit…awkward.”

Roaring laughter could be heard from both Alastor and Akos. He turned to see them both approaching, Alastor looking like he was about to fall over.

“Awkward?” He said between laughs. “No, my dear Luci, this is hilarious! He doesn't have a snowball's chance in Hell as they say!”

“Indeed, that muscle head does not,” Akos confirmed. “I have even less interest in things related to romance...or sex...than my protege here. I am Akos, by the way...the one Satan apparently is pointlessly smitten by.”

“Oh...Nice to meet you, ma’dam. And...well...damn,” Ozzie muttered, rubbing the back of his neck. “It’s gonna be a toss up on how he reacts to this news.”

“His therapist is going to have his work cut out for him, either way…,” Bee sighed, her fingers to her temple.

~Let’s just hope he doesn’t go the route Vox used to be on....~ Alastor remarked privately, a hint of concern in his voice.

~At least in this case, Akos has more than enough power to keep him in his place….~

~So long as he doesn’t have a kink for masochism.~

~Ugh…I hope not….~ Lucifer had to keep his expression of disgust of his face.

“Well this cuts this visit short,” Ozzie was saying.

“Not necessarily,” Lucifer countered. “It’s rather fortunate you two showed up. You see, we got some big things coming...and you two are the Sins I trust the most with this.”

“OK, hun, call me intrigued, what’s up?” Bee asked, Ozzie nodding in agreement.

Lucifer was torn for a moment on what to mention first.

“You know about Charlie’s redemption project, right?” Both Sin’s nodded. “Well…to put it simply, it’s possible”

“We recently had a third redemption,” Charlie added.

“Un-holy shit!” Ozzie exclaimed. “You’re not pulling our legs?”

“Nope!” Lucifer confirmed. “Some...kinks...still need to be worked out, but it should start becoming a regular thing soon.”

“Wait...wait wait…!” Ozzie had his hands raised. A chair manifested behind him as he sat down, the Sin rubbing his temples. “Something about this is poking me and it’s not quite coming...pun not intended, by the way!”

“The effects on the economy?” Bee offered.

Yes! That’s it!” Ozzie had jumped up to his feet again, the chair disappearing in a puff of dark blue smoke. “I really hope you are not going to leave us money makers high and dry on this, Luci….”

“Of course not,” Lucifer assured him. “We are looking for solutions, possible replacements for souls as collateral for soulbucks and so on.”

“We already poised the question to a few trusted Overlords here in Pride,” Alastor pointed out.

~Wait...did you ever ask Vox?~ Lucifer asked.

~He’s a smart enough man to realize the problem himself,~ Alastor assured him.

~You trust him not to use this information against us~

~If he did, I can shut him down...~ Alastor said firmly. ~After all...much of his tech relies on radio for transmission.~

~Noted.~

“Ah, so you’re asking us to brainstorm on our end,” Ozzie was saying, Lucifer nodded. “Well, we’ll give it a shot, Luci, but this sounds more like a ‘Mammon’ thing….”

“I’d rather avoid getting Mammon involved unless we have no other choice,” Lucifer said darkly.

“Unfortunately, hun, I bet he’ll monopolize any solution we come up with regardless,” Bee sighed. “Being the Sin of Greed and all…”

“I know…,” Lucifer acknowledged with a sigh of his own. “You could say I’m just trying to delay it for as long as possible. Now for the other news-”

“It just occurred to me that I was uncharacteristically rude,” Alastor cut in. “Allow me the opportunity to correct that. I am Alastor, the Radio Demon...and future King’s Consort.”

Both Sins blinked, then expressions of absolute glee covered their faces.

“Oooh,” Ozzie cooed. “So you are the lucky man that won my man, Luci over!”

“Indeed I am,” Alastor confirmed, his smile widening.  He had put out a hand, expecting a hand shake, but the Sin of Lust scooped him up into a bear hug instead.

His beloved made a very interesting squeaking sound. That and along with his expression of mortification, made Lucifer start to laugh, Akos along with him, both drowning out Charlie’s attempts to ‘inform’ the Sin of Lust of Alastor’s aversion to touch.

The scowl Alastor gave him made him laugh even harder before the Radio Demon melted into shadow and remanifested a healthy distance away from the Sin. He was now making a show of dusting himself off and straightening his coat.

“Oh..sorry, didn't know you're not a hugger type,” Ozzie said sheepishly.

“He's not the ‘touchy feely’ type in general,” Lucifer told him once he caught his breath.  “Unless it's me.”

“I believe the term you coined is ‘Lucisexual’?” Akos remarked with a smirk, Ozzie laughing.

“I love it!” the Sin exclaimed.

~If you start telling him about our sex life I am-~ Alastor’s threat was cut off when the Radio Demon sudden clenched his stomach and gagged.

“Whoa...you OK there bud?” Ozzie asked concerned. “I didn’t think I hugged ya that hard….”

“It-it’s not because of you…” Alastor wheezed, starting to stagger. “It...it’s something...else...”

“Al….” Lucifer asked, concerned. “What is going on?”

“I….” Before he could respond he suddenly shifted into his ‘devourer’ demonic form.

Furniture was knocked over and pushed aside as the form nearly completely filled the space, people scrambling to get out of the way of flailing tentacles and wings.

“Al!” Lucifer cried out as Alastor started to heave…resembling very much like a cat trying to cough up a hair ball.

“What is going on?” Bee asked, worry on both her and Ozzie’s faces.

He hadn’t want to reveal this about Alastor to them just yet but…

“Alastor..he’s been given the ability to devour unrepentant sinners...to send them to eternal damnation,” he explained. “I...I think...this...this is a part of it?”

“Um...I think we need more-” Ozzie stated to ask when Alastor finally coughed up...something.

It was mix of grey and red, landed on the carpet with a slight ‘splat’ and appeared to be somewhat gelatinous, more like playdoh, actually. Size wise it was roughly eight feet long, three feet wide and two feet tall.

“That’s...one hell of a loogie…,” Ozzie remarked, making a face.

“Gross…,” Bee stated, a similar expression on hers

But Alastor wasn’t done yet. He had shifted his head and started heaving again. A moment later, another...playdoh like blob came out, this time silver in color, slightly smaller over all in size. Only then did Alastor revert to his default state, where he promptly sat on the floor with a huff.

“Fuck…,” he moaned, Lucifer going to his side immediately. “They forgot to put that in the instruction manual….”

“Are you alright, love?” Lucifer asked him as Charlie, the two Sins and Angel joined him

“I’m fine...that just...caught me by surprise,” Alastor sighed.

“What...are those?” Charlie asked as Akos started poking one of them with their tail, thus far the only one brave enough to closely scrutinize them.

“Valentino and Cyber,” Alastor replied. “Well…what they’ve apparently been turned into....”

“Which is….” Lucifer pried.

“I’m not entirely certain….”

“I do sense their consciousness…,” Akos revealed. “I think...they are aware of their...state of being.”

“Let’s test that!” Angel spoke up with glee, the spider demon picking up a stool. “The red and grey one is Valentino, right?”

“And just how is that going to ‘test’ anything if they have no mouths to scream with?” Akos told him, their arms folded across their chest.

“They have a point, Angel,” Alastor pointed out. “Besides, I’d rather you not add ‘wrath’ to your list of sins to work on.”

“Aw, shit...you have a point,” Angel sighed and put the stool back down.

“Brother, while I run some simple appropriate tests, how about you explain to our guests what Alastor is,” Akos suggested, the seraphim summoning a few tools for such a task.

“Yes! Please do!” Ozzie stated. “I am very confused here!”

“Same,” Bee agreed.

Lucifer sighed and nodded, guiding the others away from the blobs so Akos had space to work.

---

A bit later

“Damn...that’s a heck of tale,” Ozzie concluded once Lucifer had finished. They were all currently sitting around the dinning room table. “Big man upstairs really trying to fix things it seems.”

“Seems like it,” Lucifer agreed.

“That’s a big responsibly He put on ya, kid,” Bee stated, looking at Alastor. “Hope you can handle it.”

“Time will tell,” Alastor stated with a sigh.

“Well if you ever need to unwind, you can come visit me or Ozzie on our respective Rings! We’ll help you destress, no problem!”

“Ah, I’m afraid my personal tastes don’t align with what either of you have to offer, but I do appreciate it,” Alastor said with a chuckle.

“Consider it a standing offer, then,” Bee said with a wide smile.

“Wait, Bee...would he even be able to visit our Rings?” Ozzie asked. “You know the whole...’sinners can’t leave Pride’ shit….”

“While we had yet a reason to test it, I do believe Al is no longer ‘constrained’ by that rule,” Lucifer stated. “Both due to being redeemed and our coming marriage.”

“I don’t foresee having a ‘reason’ to visit the other Rings anytime soon, at least for ‘business’ purposes,” Alastor remarked. “Since the only ones I can redeem are here in Pride.”

“We hope you do make social visits once in awhile,” Bee said, Ozzie nodding in agreements. “At least to get Luci ‘out of the house’ once in while, you hear?”

Lucifer shrunk down a bit in his chair, grinning sheepishly.

“Oh I can help...ensure that,” Alastor said with a mischievous grin.

“Al...I don’t like that look…,” Lucifer muttered.

“Come now, my dear...as King you do need to be seen by your subjects,” Alastor chided. “And not just the ones here in Pride.”

“I hate you…,” Lucifer grumbled under his breath. He didn’t mean that of course, but from the playful chuckle Alastor made, he knew that.

They heard Akos’ clear their throat and they all looked their way.

“Akos, what did you figure out?” Charlie asked.

Akos had a somewhat disturbed expression on their face as they joined them at the table.

“It took a few creative use of spells...but I was able to determine what those blobs are,” they began. “I’ll start with this: eternal punishment...is an apt description of what’s been done to them.”

“I’m afraid to know…” Lucifer muttered, the others nodding in agreement. “But go ahead….”

“Both have been reduced to...in essence...their respective sins and are experiencing the suffering of their victims their sins caused. Their...bodies...are essentially their suffering in tangible, malleable form.”

It took a moment for that to sink in, the implications to become clear in their heads. It was Husk, whom had joined him, that spoke.

“Wait a goddamn second,” the cat demon said. “Are you saying...those...blobs...could be...molded into objects?”

Akos pulled out a vial, it was full of what looked like Cyber’s ‘blob’, before dumping it’s contents onto the table. With a twirl of a finger, that small blob then split into three pieces, then flatted and hardened into coin like objects.

What they were implying was very clear.

“But...is it right to use them like this?” Charlie whimpered, hugging herself. “Yes...they...they were both horrible people but….”

“From what I can tell, they cannot feel anything we do to them,” Akos told her. “So, to the best of my knowledge, we are not adding to their suffering doing this. Still...I’d rather we continue to look for...other...options.”

“Especially since I’m the only one that can create this...material…,” Alastor muttered, reaching out with a hand to tap one of the ‘coins’.”

“Y-yeah...supply would be limited,” Lucifer agreed. “Since it has to be unrepentant sinners….”

“And Mammon would definitely attempt to monopolize that...probably try to capture Alastor to control the supply….” Ozzie mentioned grimly.

“If he even makes as much as a twitch toward, Al...He Is Toast,” Lucifer snarled, his eyes turning red.

“And I wouldn’t go down quietly to start with,” Alastor snarled.

“This is a shot in the dark but…,” Angel spoke up. “Could there be another way to...uh...’tanglablize’ suffering like this? This is Hell after all...should be plenty to draw from?”

The room went silent for a moment before Akos spoke. “It might be possible,” they said as they picked up one of the ‘coins’. “I believe what Alastor made here proves the concept...it just needs a more...feasible source.”

“Turning actual suffering into currency…,” Charlie muttering, looking uncomfortable. “I can see how that can encourage certain types to...purposely inflict it for their own gain.”

“Perhaps, perhaps not,” Akos said. “It will largely depend on what is required to accomplish this. If it requires something too complex, or too high a magic cost...it wouldn’t be feasible for just anyone to create themselves. But we are getting ahead of ourselves...we need to determine if this is even truly possible without Alastor first.”

“And defo keep this on the down low,” Ozzie pointed out.

Everyone nodded in agreement.

Notes:

AU series!
Wings of Chaos - Complete
Wings of Redemption

Other Hazbin Related Stuff
Hazbin Shorts
Ruthlessness - my contribution to the EPIC: the Musical madness!
Fanart - Hazbin Stuff starts on chap 35
Hazin Hotel Headcanons - Warning! Potential Spoilers here!

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