Work Text:
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One slightly windy cool autumn day, years after one of the darkest winters, or for some, summers, in recent human memory:
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to Eugene Sledge
I read your book. its good. I remember you being able to hold your drink better than you said. i remeber dont want to give away any marine secrets.
M. Shelton
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A few days later:
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Merriell Shelton,
It's good to hear from you. Thank you for the kind words on the book. I spent so much time on it, by the end I was struggling to find a single word in the English language I didn't hate!
Now I couldn't be too honest on the drinking front could I, after all I have the good Southern image to uphold! But don't worry, I doubt I'm letting slip any marine secrets that haven't been bared before, and I don't think the Japanese Empire need them any more besides.
If you have any further feedback on the book, or even just questions, I'd be happy to hear them. Send them on and I'll write you back.
Warm regards, your old friend,
Eugene Sledge
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A few weeks after that cool windy day, the sun makes one last full hot day appearance in tribute to the summer, before retiring for the year:
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To Eugene Sledge
My son got me the book. I shouldnt of been surprised you published one. always were scribbling away in that damn bible. I thought it was good. bit too fluffy in places but thats the stuff people want to read bout aint it. the idea of you being a nice southern gentleman died somewhere between you whingeing about work on pavuvu and groaning about wet boondockers on peleliu.
M. Shelton
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The next day, the quickest the slow morning sun has let the postman work yet:
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To Merriell Shelton
You have a son? Congratulations! I assume belated congratulations of the nuptial variety are in order too?
I'm glad you like the book. There was an unexpected challenge when it came to editing, in having to pick witch sections to change or to keep. I found writing it to ultimately be a restorative process, the editing however was a sonna bitch worse than I anticipated. It was almost another one of those civilian things, you know the ones, where they want to talk about the war or know something about the war but you cant tell them anything too shocking or too scandalous or too real. I suppose the tide of time was on my side in this endeavour, as taking so long to write the damn thing let people move on from the war enough to be ready to read about it. I have the feeling I had to take out a whole lot less than I would of had to in 1950 let alone when we got back.
It took that long for you to see behind the mask did it SnafMerriell? would of thought the sight of me bitching with Bill Leyden and messing around with the likes of Sid Phillips let you know I weren't no southern belle. In seriousness though, if you don't mind reading my woes, of late I have been feeling as far from a proper southern gentleman as I have since coming back from our stint in living hell. I've recently become divorced, legal procedures have concluded but we are still sorting out what of the little things belongs to whom. The whole thing has been relatively amicable on both ends, so no need for any pity, its just not the kind of thing one envisions in their life is it? "I'll get back home from the war, find a girl and a job, marry the girl, get a better job, and oh yes, get divorced." I'm not complaining really, my lot in life has been pretty good on the whole, I'm a lot luckier than some of the other bastards we knew, even if my mother dosnt seem to think so. Anyhow if the worst I have is a semi-friendly ex-wife who put up with me for longer than she maybe should of and a half empty house, then the old geezer in the sky mustn't be thinking too ill of me.
Enough of my wining, what has been going on with you recently? Or hell, in the last god knows how many years since we last saw each other? I can't believe you have a son! How old is he? What does he look like? Is there a Merriel Shelton Jr running around New Orleans, creeping the jeepers out of little boys and pulling the pigtails of little girls? or does he take more after your better half? speaking of, who the hell married Merriell Shelton and how did you trick her into it? Now that's a story I'd like to hear.
Your friend, filled with so many questions,
Eugene "Sledgehammer"
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Sledgehammer.
that was one awful long letter, are we pen pals now Eugene? I have two sons. one eight, one five years old. their mother passed two years ago now. we were married. we dont live in new orleans any more, me n the boys have a house just outside the city. I dont know what you expected when writing a book. thats generally how they work aint it? I dont even need a fancy education to figure that one Eugene. you always did that, had so many thoughts in your big head that only the fool ones end up coming out. you need to believe in yourself more. the book was good. cant believe you just made me write that sentence look there it is again believe. that tells me ive done enough of this pen-pal business. you will just have to get used to short letters on my half. I dont got all those words like you sledgehammer.
From M. Shelton
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A small reprieve, for some breathing easy, for others there may be a wind picking up, perhaps making it that much harder to draw breath:
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To Merriell
I'm sorry for dribbling on like that in my last letter. I only just realised that you simply wrote me to commend the book in your first letter, and that it was me who started asking all the questions. I apologise for overstepping my bounds. I suppose I just wasn't expecting to hear from you, even though I did mention you in the book, a sign of life wasn't even considered.
My deepest condolences to hear about your wife. God condolences dosnt even begin to cover it, I am only loosing a wife in name, I cannot imagine what being widowed so young with two small children must be like. You have always seemed to be able to do what you need to survive, I hope you and your sons are landed only good living from now on Merriell.
I do have trouble, thinking too much, and never the right stuff at that. Always that much worse at the holidays what with it being, family time, and all that. just another burden i
God this letter is a mess i am just going to seal it up and send it now so i don't spend all day writing and re-writing it.
Faithfully,
Sledgehammer
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Although sent separately the following letter is delivered in the same mail round:
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No You Know What Snafu I don't owe you SHIT let alone a goddamn apology for sending a goddamn letter. I didnt used too need to ask you any fucking questions about your fucking wife and kids. but then you fucking left me without not even a goodbye. one damn word goddamn word, you wouldnt think it would be too hard would it merriell? to wake up your war buddy for one more word to saay goodbye. what the fuck did i even do to not deserve that huh?
I spent so much time trying so goddamn hard to forget the endless bloody hell we wnet through and when I couldnt do that I accepted it. I grew the fuckup and accepted it. I found a goddamn job and a goddamn girl and grew up. I build a life for myself, a family for myself Merriell and you werent in it. you didn't want to be in it so I made sure you weren't I damn near forgot your son of a bich name till you send that stupid letter. what makes you think you can just worm your way back itno my life like you have any rightto. you dont. have any right. you left that on some train in the middle of the night however manny years ago. why do you what makes my own damn father do you
donnt contact me again.
Do Not send me any more fucking letters.
E.S.
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The sky has darkened bringing one punishing hangover, and one cold solemn night:
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To Eugene
I am sorry. I didn't mean to upset you Eugene.
I never meant to hurt you. I don't know why you always used to think I knew what I was doing, I never had any idea. The whole time I didnt have a clue. Ill stop sending letters if thats what you want. It reads like you woulda slogged me a good one if you ever see me again. You can if you like. Come up here to break my jaw if you want. It sounds like it might do you some good, get rid of all that pent up stuff you got brewing in there. Help you forget if you want.
Whatever you do you don't have to hear from me again.
Goodbye,
M. Shelton
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On the day after a letter was dropped in a post box, a strong wind blew a note stuffed in an envolpoe, then promptly screwed up, out a half open window, where it fell and dissolved in a dirty puddle. If one was to read that note if probably would of said this:
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Goodbye Eugene, you deserved a lot more than I could give you.
Yours still, Merriell.
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The wind stays strong now and the sun is cold, it seems closer and closer to snowing day by day, but as one by one the flowers wilt and the leaves freeze off, it never does:
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Shelton
Sorry for that outburst. I don't normally drink that much anymore.
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Sledgehammer
Enough apologising for shit. come up if you want. Christmas aint a big thing here. the boys wont mind. theyll force you to build snowmen for them.
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(Encased in this envelope is no letter, simply a receipt for a train ticket arriving just outside New Orleans a few days before Christmas. It contains more forgiveness than words written on a page could ever attempt.)
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Remember to pack clothes that can get wet. The boys havent shut up about the snow since we got the first little bit the other day. I hope you like raisins because the old lady next door has been giving us so many damn cookies the boys aint slept a full night all week. there excited to meet you. I wonder what you look like now. Stay warm.
M. Shelton
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The days and nights rise then fall as reliably as trains arrive then leave the station. Time ticks over into a new calendar year, yet the snow falls as it ever has, the birds sing as they always have, and the seasons progress as they always will, until the days start getting that little bit longer, the sun shining that little bit stronger:
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Merriell,
Before you start needlessly worrying, yes I got back fine, yes I remembered all my things, everything I packed survived the journey back. I may have to do some grovelling at work to make up for taking a few extra days off but other than that my biggest concern is my mother. I suspect she wont be too pleased with the lack of warning I provided before diching the previously arranged Christmas plans. I've survived worse I suppose.
I know I already said it in person but I did just want to say here, formally, that I really appreciate you putting me up for the past few weeks. Merriell, I know we have put each other through the wringer over the course of us knowing each other, yet still you and both the boys welcomed me into your home and made me feel like I was one of the Sheltons too. I also can't believe you didn't warn me about your sister bringing her family around, I felt like a bit of an intruder there, some strange man in your house at the holidays.
All surprises aside, truly, I will miss being a part of your family when I'm down here in Mobile, even if it's only a few hours by train or car. Maybe I could host easter, or 4th of July, or some other occasion when the time comes. You guys come have a look-see at my corner of mobile.
Love to everyone,
Yours,
Eugene
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Eugene, you think all three of us gonna pile in some train or something just to come down see you? Keep dreamin boo. Your gonna be a new orleans local before long, just you wait. "some strage man" my ass. Unless your talkin about your face being a bit strange lookin, there were nothing strage at all. The two rascals cant shut up about Uncle Gene this Uncle Gene that. Youre family now too, boo. If I didnt know youd get your knickers in a knot about it Id tell ya, sell that damn empty house a yours, come shack up in the spare room. You know we have the space darlin, and I could use the extra set of hands. The people round here dont give a shit bout that sorta thing, everybodys got their whole damn family bunked up ya know? Anyway don't know why your still scared of you mother for, she somehow worse than the whole jap army? Tell her you gotta a boy down in new orleans and hes gonna raise you two little rugrats, thatll shut her up quick smart.
Love Merriell Shelton
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So as the earth spins the seasons revolve, the weather makes its course, and one can look out at the birds and the bees, the leaves in the trees, and see with time how things change, and sometimes, if one lets them, it can often be for the better.
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