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English
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Spook Me Ficathon 2025
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Published:
2025-10-14
Completed:
2025-10-14
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3,728
Chapters:
6/6
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2
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13
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103

Catcalls

Summary:

Wei Wuxian is just your average everyday working single-parent necromancer living next to a cursed and haunted graveyard. People are welcome to call him to hire him - if he has phone minutes this month, which he probably doesn't.

Notes:

Written for [personal profile] spook_me 2025, with the prompt "Graveyard." (There is less graveyard here than might be expected from that. Also probably less spookiness.)

This is based on a solo TTRPG, Six Figures Under ("or, You Went Through Ten Years Of Necromancy School And They Never Taught You How To Market Yourself."). The chapter titles are the "minigames" (or more accurately, stages) from the original game. Summaries are mostly paraphrased.

Beta assistance from the wonderful dinosnoree who noticed things like "was this paragraph supposed to just trail off mid-sentence?"

Chapter 1: False Life Advertising

Summary:

Create a Craigslist post for your necromancy business; do not use any of the forbidden words: Necromancy/Necromancer; Revive/Revivification; Resurrect/Resurrection; Dead/Death/Deceased; Life/Living/Alive; Bring back; Undead; Grave; Corpse/Body

Chapter Text

I’m Wei Wuxian; you may have heard of me as the Yiling Patriarch and a hero of the Sunshot War. I specialize in resentful energies and returning inactive people to a state of useful temporary activity. I also remove curses, especially those related to the Burial Mounds or caused by ghosts. I can find unquiet beings powered by resentment and soothe their way into rest with the hope of a better future when they are reborn.

If you are afflicted by demonic creatures, worried about the spirits of family members that are sticking around longer than they should, or want some paper talismans to protect your home, give me a call. My rates are good!

Note: I don’t work in Yunmeng and I do not take apprentices.