Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Annie

Annie had always been told that she was too bold for her own good. That for a Borrower, the combination of fearlessness and curiosity could only ever mean one thing:

Trouble.

She totally got it. For beings that only reached four inches, the outside world was dangerous as hell. From the stories she was told, there wasn’t pretty much anything out there that couldn’t kill her. Potential death lurked in the form rats, cats or martens - not to mention stealthy cats and perfidious crows. Even a change in the weather was enough to trap her kind in water and mud, or whisk them away by sudden torrents.

All the dangers of the outside world, however, paled in comparison to what awaited her on the inside:

The world of the Titans. Intelligent, bloodthirsty monsters that shaped the world to their liking and devoured everything they laid their eyes upon. While their general appearance was said to resemble that of Borrowers, they were a hundred times their size - like living mountains, stretching up to the sky! She's heard stories of entire villages being destroyed in their wake, their only warning being the heavy quakes of thunderous steps before disaster striked.

They were the unquestioned apex predators of this world. And if that was not enough, the particular Titan residing right past the Wall was said to be the most gargantuan and dangerous of them all.

From the moment she had heard about the Titans, Annie had sworn to herself that she would one day see one for herself. That she would find out if the stories were actually true.

When she was younger, her father would often tell her stories about the Borrowers of old. Of people building boats to cross the largest rivers and taming birds to ride on their backs. Whenever she had trouble sleeping, he always had a new story up his sleeve. There was not a single night, however, that he told a story about the Titans and the world beyond the Wall. One evening when she had asked him about it, his eyes had gained a glint so dark and dangerous that she didn't dare to ask further. ‘There are no stories about the Titans beyond the Wall’ he had said with iron in his voice. ‘Because no Borrower who had ever ventured past had ever come back alive.’

By now, Annie wasn't entirely sure if that was really true. The more she thought about it, the more the suspicion arose that a good portion of her father’s stories had been made up for the sole purpose of keeping her from going to dangerous places and trying stupid things. She couldn’t blame him for it, really. But the prospect of exploring new worlds was simply too enticing! The thought alone was enough to make her rise to her toes, hands trembling in giddiness. Soon enough, she would go out there to see all those wonders herself.

Thing is, patience had never been one of her strong suits, and she didn’t see that changing anytime soon. It had been a miracle in and on itself that her father had shown her the outside world at the tender age of six – a first in Borrower history, not to brag. According to him, it was all thanks to her incessant questions and begging. Apparently, all her hard training in perfecting her doe eyes had finally paid off. And dare she say, she didn’t disappoint him. She had always been extra careful and vigilant whenever she ventured out into the wild. Up to this day, she had never been even close to death. Or, well, at least if you didn’t count the one time that she was chased by a cat. Or the time she fell into the light shaft. Or the time she fell off the bramble bush. But hell, were those berries worth it.

Anyway, she had learned a lot in these years. Dare she say she could call herself a full-fledged Borrower by now, ready to face anything!

And with ‘anything’, she meant nothing less than the greatest threat and mystery to Borrowerkind.

Of course, her father was absolutely against it. She deemed him a great and fearless man, but no matter the way she brought up the topic, he stayed adamant about his view on the Titan world. That part of his unbending attitude was enough to send a chill down her spine, but at the same time, it only fuelled her unending curiosity. Yes, she had heard, over and over, how Titans were bloodthirsty and cruel and extremely dangerous, but by all honesty how bad could it be? Surely they couldn’t be more vicious than a squirrel (her sworn archenemy for obvious reasons). And even so, she would simply not get caught in the first place. She wouldn’t even be seen. After all these years of training, she had it down to a fine art - merging with the stems and leaves, blending in with her environment just like a mantis.

It was the day after her thirteenth birthday that Annie decided by herself that she was ready to face the unknown. With the excuse of spending the day outside, she snuck into the passageways leading to the inside right after breakfast. The excitement grew with each step she took along the great hallway, across the nail hops and past the long pipes, until she reached the bottom end of the great staple ladder.

Bright blue eyes trailed up the ladder, trying but failing to find its end.

The Wall.

The barrier between her world and theirs.

The place none of her forebears had ever returned from.

She would be the first Borrower to achieve that. Soon enough, she would see if the stories were true.

Bertholdt

Bertholdt’s weekend had started in the worst possible way. Granted, his average day wasn’t much to celebrate – not with the resits he had to take since failing his GCSE Maths - but with Upper Sixth starting this week, the grim reality of approaching finals hit him as hard as the overhead serve in this morning’s tennis session.

His cheek was still pounding from that one single moment of carelessness, and he was lucky it missed his eye by a few inches. All just because his thoughts kept bouncing back to the message he'd received last night.

He'd never seen Reiner use so many emojis before in his life. Their chat screen was more crammed than the endgame of Tetris.

So, he and Krista were officially dating now. He couldn’t say he was surprised. The air around them had been practically sparkling for months, so it had only been a matter of time. And as his best mate, of course he'd support him as best he could. For some reason though, all the blazing hearts and giddy emojis didn’t quite hit the mark.

It was stupid, really. It wasn’t like he was jealous or anything. From what he knew about her, Krista was joyful, kind and open-hearted - one out of few who wouldn't even talk behind his back. She was perfect for Reiner. They’d be happy together.

Happier than with him, at least. 

The more sombre part of him was there in an instant, or perhaps it had never truly left. Lately, it had become as natural to him as the spots that had followed him since his early teens. It was true, though. Ever since Reiner laid eyes on her, they barely hung out anymore. Instead, he'd started hanging around the juniors - Krista's classmates - whenever he could. Their parties were on a whole different level, he'd told him.

Reluctantly, Bertholdt pulled his phone from his tennis bag, opening the colourful message to come up with a long-overdue reply. Now that he was idly waiting for the bus home, he had no more excuses to put it off.

‘Really?? I’m so chuffed for you two! Sounds like last night went well, yes?’

The answer came almost instantly.

‘It was mental. Shame you couldn’t make it. Should've seen everyone’s faces when we kissed’

Bertholdt inadvertently made a face.

‘You know how it is, extras are killing me. Sorry.’

‘Extras on Friday nights? Brutal. Hope you’ll ditch them soon’

‘Or finals will ditch me haha.’

Reiner’s reply took longer this time, and he wondered if his joke had come across too dark. It wasn’t like his grades were that bad. He had simply lost the motivation to put his all into his studies after what happened last year. And as much as he hated to admit it, watching that fairy tale unfolding in front of him didn’t make it any better.

‘Don’t be daft. You’ll be fine. And don’t forget, Krista’s offer still stands. She’s a proper angel, even when it comes to algebra.’

Bertholdt replied with a final ‘Will do’ before letting out a long sigh. Truth be told, he didn’t even have a class last night. He had dropped his extra lessons at the end of summer break since they only made him feel worse. But the thought of watching Reiner and Krista openly flirting in that painfully flashy way of theirs was enough to make him feel sick.
On top of that, he couldn’t stomach being around so many people. Never had. His own classmates already went out of their way to avoid him whenever they could, and he was certain the juniors would be no different. By now, he was wondering if he was suffering some rare form of psychological disorder because whenever he went to parties, his hands would get sweaty and his body would start to tense up like a wire pulled taut, and he'd lose the ability to form the simplest string of words if he was unlucky enough to be talked to. Wherever he was, he felt like he was taking up too much space. And the fact that he usually towered over everyone didn't help the feeling of having all eyes on him just so they wouldn't miss it if something funny happened with him.

To put it simply, being around people left him painfully uncomfortable, and he was terrible at hiding it. And it didn't help when he realised that was exactly why they avoided him in the first place.

Bertholdt heaved another sigh when the bus he'd been waiting for finally arrived. As usual, it had been delayed by almost half an hour.

Not that it mattered. As always, he didn't have any plans for the weekend.

As always, he'd spend his free time alone.

Annie

The climb up the Wall took longer than Annie had expected. Judging by her aching arms, she must have scaled about the height of the big ivy by now, and that was almost as high as the highest trees! The fact that some of the staples had come loose over the years didn’t make it any easier. More than once, they had given way under her grip, leaving her dangling in the air. It wasn’t enough to halt her progress, though. More than anything, the thought of treading ancient paths filled her with unbridled excitement.

It was a miracle in and on itself that the staple ladder had not been sealed or destroyed. Perhaps her father had not deemed her bold enough to actually make the climb. Or stupid, depending on how you saw it.

She wondered how long it had been since a Borrower had last been here. Whoever had built these stairs must have put their everything into it. Judging by the amount of dust and rust, however, it must have been generations.

Perhaps, she thought to herself, they aren’t even there anymore. Her father had said himself that he had never been past the Walls, so it would only made sense that they had abandoned the place. It would certainly explain why she had never seen a trace of them.

“Please be there…” she whispered to herself while straining her eyes in the weak light of her pocket lamp.

When she finally reached the top, she almost bumped her head against the ceiling. For some inexplicable reason, she had expected the top of the ladder to be flooded in light - that the portal to the other world would reveal itself in the most spectacular fashion. Perhaps she had been imagining this moment with a bit too much eagerness.

With her lamp held high, she followed the path further until she reached another set of stairs, this time built with nails. It was then that she noticed it: a strange, rhythmic ticking coming from somewhere up the stairs. It was sharp as a cricket’s song, but persistent as the water drop behind their house.

As if pulled by invisible threads, she followed the unknown sound without another thought.

It took her a total of almost an hour until she finally found the source: a slim yet distinct crack of light.

All her exhaustion was forgotten the moment she noticed it.

The crack was surprisingly small. She would have totally missed it if she had come at night. And at the first glance, it was far too narrow for even a Borrower like her to fit through. Upon closer inspection though, there was a larger contraption attached to it - or rather, to the end of the corridor. A rectangle wall with a circular ring in its centre – a perfect ring, no less. It was odd, to say the least, but even more was the bundle of cables attached to it. She wondered if it was a door powered electrically – if such a thing were even possible. That didn’t explain why there was no handle, though.

She ran a hand over the edge in search for a knob. The surface was smooth like glass – a special material that they rarely came across. It made her wonder if that, too, originally came from the world of the Titans.

In the end, she didn’t find a handle, or anything related. She did notice, however, that the structure didn’t fit smoothly into the wall. Perhaps, if she gave it just a little more of a push…

“It worked!!” She exclaimed, more to herself than anyone else. She had actually managed to move the wall! Now the crack was wide enough for her to squeeze through.

Annie took a deep breath. Then another. And another. Then she pushed herself through the crack and made her way toward the light.

The world Annie found herself in wasn’t anything like what she had imagined.

Granted, she didn’t exactly know what she had imagined, but certainly not… this.

The first thing that struck her was that everything was huge. And with huge, she meant freakin’ enormous!! Instead of the blue sky, there was a ceiling overhead, so far away that for a moment, she wondered if it was even higher than the sky. And there was so much space! No grass, no bushes, no nothing on the ground that could obstruct her view or offer shelter. Just a plain wooden floor and a second, softer floor on top of it. There were structures, yes, but those too loomed high like trees on all her sides. Dare she call this a room? It wasn’t a room in any ordinary sense, but she didn’t know what else to call it. A hall? A great hall? It made the great hall in the passageways laughably small in comparison.

Annie almost forgot how to breathe from the excitement flooding every vein. Carefully, as if afraid she might wake from this dream, she took one step after the other toward the centre of the ‘room’. Treading in open space like this made her incredibly queasy. All her instincts told her that she was presenting herself on a silver platter. But she trusted her senses and scanned her surroundings meticulously. So far, there was no sign of any other living being.

From her new position in the centre of the room, she could make out a lot more details that had evaded her from the cable door. The most massive of the blocks looked like a solid wooden cube, while the tallest reached almost to the ceiling. It ran around one corner and had numerous boards filled with all sorts of colourful things. Even an ivy was nestled on one of the higher boards, potted into a container almost as large as her entire room. Bordering on one side was a long, flat plain on high pillars with a second object on lower pillars beneath it. A similar set of structures was on the opposite corner of the room, though entirely black and distinctly slimmer. The strange ticking was coming from a wooden disc on the wall.

And lastly, there was a really massive plain with two layers that took up at least a quarter of the entire space. The fact that the lower layer appeared to be wood made her wonder how a construction this size didn’t collapse under its own weight. A bed, some insane part of her mind pieced together. A bed for a being that must be a hundred times her size.

It then all clicked together in an instant. The wardrobe. The corner shelf. The chair and desk. The door on the opposite wall that was just about as high as the bed was long.

This entire world was a room made for an actual Titan!!

It took her a moment to calm her racing heart and prevent her from fainting right there and then. No matter how many times she had imagined this scenario, how many times she had pictured a world fit for Titans, nothing could have prepared her for the shock of actually seeing it.

So… they were real. They were actually real. No way could a place like this have been built by Borrowers. The stories had been true, after all!

Good thing this room was obviously abandoned. Judging by the tingling in her fingers and toes, she wasn’t sure if she would survive even seeing an actual Titan.

Annie considered bolting right back to her room to process everything she had seen. To maybe even tell her father about her grand discovery. She was about to turn when she noticed a few more details that had eluded her on the first sight: a bundle of large sheets, most likely clothes, stapled in a messy pile. An open book with lines upon lines resting against the backrest of the long, black table. A couple of bags scattered against the shelf and the desk.

The obvious fact that the plant looked vital even though rain would never reach it.

The bone-rattling truth that this room was not at all abandoned made itself known in the form of a distant, powerful quake.

Oh gods, what had she gotten herself into?

Bertholdt

Bertholdt closed the door with less care than usual.

“Darling, careful with the door, please!” his mum called from the kitchen. Apparently, the bus ride had taken so long that she’s already started preparing lunch.

“Sorry.” He mumbled under his breath before dropping his coat. He wasn’t in the mood to talk, really.

“Did something happen? Lost the match again? You know you could always switch to a club where they don’t go so hard on you.”

“It’s fine. Just a bad start, that’s all.” He was already rounding the corner when his mum took a good look at him and dropped her work altogether.

“What happened to your face! Look at you, you’re all red and swollen!”

“I know. Certainly feels the part. Completely messed that one up.”

“If you want, I can wrap a cooling pack and get you some decongest-“

“I said it’s fine!” He almost spat the words. “Just give it some time, alright? It’ll heal on its own.”

He started to climb the stairs in lumbering steps, deliberately ignoring the worry plastered on his mother’s face.

“And stop calling me darling, please. I’m turning eighteen next year.”

Annie

When the first quake subsided, Annie was about 80% sure that it had only been her imagination. When a pair of muffled voices followed, not as much anymore. And when more heavy quakes became even more heavy, she finally snapped and bolted the nearest hiding spot which was the footing of the bed.

No epic tale nor wildest dream had prepared her for the moment that the door started to move - only to reveal an entity that was the stuff of nightmares. A Titan. An actual living, breathing Titan was pushing aside the massive door like it weighed nothing before ducking his head under the towering doorframe.

Annie forgot how to breathe. She forgot how to exist. She forgot how to do anything other than stare higher and higher and higher from behind her hiding spot in pure dumbfoundedness.

The door closed with a deafening clack! and Annie's entire frame cringed. She was now trapped in the room with a Titan. Oh gods, how could things end up like this? She had only wished for a little peek!

The quaking steps drew closer to her hiding spot.

Oh gods oh gods oh gods!!

A yelp escaped her throat when - out of thin air - a giant bag crashed down to the floor right next to her hiding spot. Then the pair of gigantic feet stopped right next to the bed frame and turned on the spot until they faced away. An unnerving growl was all the warning she got before an explosion louder than anything she’d ever heard reverberated through the bedframe overhead.

She couldn’t help it. She shrieked in terror at the prospect of being buried alive beneath the wooden construction most definitely not sturdy enough to support the weight of a Titan. The moment he all but collapsed on it, she had accepted her fate and sent a final prayer.

Only, that she wasn’t dead. And the bed had not crumbled as expected. It took her several moments to realize she had just made a very grave mistake.

At first, the Titan’s feet stayed planted on the floor as if nothing had happened, and for several blissful seconds, Annie almost convinced herself that he had been too distracted to hear her. Then, he started to move. Some panicked breaths later, the bitter reality crashed down in the form of two gargantuan knees and a pair of equally horrific arms dropping to the floor next to the bedframe. When his head, too, came leaning down, she finally tore her eyes away to make herself as small as possible.

Oh, how she wished she could merge with the wood right there and then.

She could feel his presence like a leaden blanket. His massive form was enough to cast heavy shadows across the entire space. Her throat constricted with fear while heart ran faster than a hawk-moth. From right behind her hiding spot, she could hear the subtle noise of shifting fabric and heavy gusts that were his breaths.

“Huh.” He finally said.

It was the most menacing thing she had heard in her lifetime.

“I could have sworn that…” his voice was right behind her now. No doubt he was scanning the floor inch by inch in this very moment. If he decided to look deeper into the space or wrap a hand around the footing, she was done for. If she flinched even a little, she was done for as well. Even with her hands folded over her mouth, she was praying he didn’t hear her breath.

“Bertholdt, darling! Lunch is ready!” A new, female voice called from beyond the door.

It was like the voice of an angel. One that magically pulled the Titan’s – ‘Bertholdt's– attention away, granting her just the smallest reprieve.

“Coming!” Annie instinctively sheltered her ears from the booming voice. It wasn’t even directed at her, and yet it hurt like crazy in her eardrums.

For a few more agonizing moments, he scanned the area before finally, finally retreating from her hiding spot.

“Urgh, whatever. Must've really hit my head or something...”

The moment she was alone in the room, Annie crossed the floor with the speed of lightning.

No way in hell would she ever come up here again. She wouldn’t leave her room for months!

Chapter Text

Annie

It had taken Annie exactly ten days and three hours after the ‘Titan incident’ to find herself scaling the Wall again.

Granted, the shock of their first encounter still lingered in her bones. She hadn’t sleep for two days, and her usual eagerness to go outside had been extinguished like a bucket of water on a flame. When another week passed, however, her curiosity sprouted again with even more vigour, steadfast and valiant like a dandelion.

The more time passed, the more questions kept bubbling up. Where did Titans come from? How long have they been there? How come they spoke the same language as them? And how did they get that tall in the first place? She still struggled to believe that this hidden world, right next to their door, had remained unseen for her entire life. But now that the door had been literally opened, there was no turning back - not until her questions were answered.

While exploring another route withing the upper Walls, she stumbled upon yet another entryway to the room - one that lead onto one of the lower boards of the corner shelf. Thanks to the ivy's long tendrils, she could reach the pot on the upper shelf while remaining completely hidden. It proved to be the perfect hiding spot. From her high vantage point beneath the leaves, she could observe most of the room while deeming herself absolutely safe.

What she witnessed filled her with equal amounts of intrigue, awe and confusion.

The first major difference she noticed was that the room was significantly warmer than the passageways. Given that she was freezing quickly and it was getting colder by the day, the warmth was very welcome. The new perspective also offered a much better view on the room’s interior. From up here, she could grasp details that had eluded her before. For instance, she noticed that most of the furniture looked similar despite their differing shapes, as if made out of the same material. That was rarely the case for their own furniture, which relied on scavenged outside materials.

She also noticed the many objects scattered on various surfaces that had been hidden from the floor. Some looked like bigger versions of things they also used at home. The majority, however, was completely new to her - all different forms and materials that she couldn’t quite make out from the distance. Nor could she fathom their purpose. Titans sure were ingenious beings.

Of course, she also got a better look at the Titan - Bertholdt - residing in this room. Her eyes had not deceived her when she had thought of him as the size of a mountain. Even up in the shelf, she could feel every rattling step he took whenever he moved. But even though her guts would squirm with every sudden movement and her instincts would scream every time he got a little too close, she couldn't shake one particular impression:

He didn't look like the bloodthirsty monster she'd imagined them to be.

Short, dark hair and pale skin free of the usual weathering of the sun. What stuck out was the he looked proportionally longer than her and her dad. One time, when the female Titan – who really turned out to be his mother – had appeared in the room, she was more than a head shorter than her son. But despite the blatant size disparaty, there was an uncanny amount of similarities shared between them.

It was almost tempting to let her guard down, but she wasn't that stupid of course. For all she knew, the familiar appearance could be a masquerade to lure unwary Borrowers. Lying hidden beneath that mask of indifference could well be the malice of an apex predator, ready to strike if given the opportunity.

There was only one way to know for sure. She had to study the Titan and learn about his habits, like with every new specimen she encountered.

Over the course of four weeks, Annie figured that the Titan's presence and activities followed a surprisingly consistent schedule. For five days a week, he was woken at point 7 a.m. by a relentlessly high-pitched beeping sound. He’d change into a white shirt and mouse-grey trousers with a jacket of a similar colour. Around his neck, he’d tie a strange band that hung down his chest like a flat fox tail. Then he’d sort a bag and leave until the afternoon.

Twice a week, he’d take an additional, larger bag with him. On those days, he’d return later than usual and with different clothes. Supplies for a ‘Tennis’ activity, as she had heard them call it. What exactly that entailed remained a mystery to her, as did the use of the odd device (a ‘racket’, she recalled) stored in his bag. The webbing interwoven in the oval circle reminded her uncomfortably of a net that could entrap creatures her size. She just hoped it wasn't used that way.

On rare occasions, the Titan would leave again in the evening. Most of the days, however, he spent the evening in his room. Mostly, he would start by reading thick books at the desk and occasionally writing in thinner notebooks. Whenever he wasn’t writing, he’d rest his head against one palm, the skin of his cheek pushed up into a fold. Mostly, he would have some snacks with him, too - sometimes some kind of crisps or nuts, but more often some flat, hard pieces, reminiscent of roots. They smelled salty and sweet though, so maybe some kind of salted fruit after all.

What exactly he was trying to accomplish remained a mystery. Judging by his grim expression, he didn’t seem to enjoy it, nor did he appear to ever finish it over the course of weeks. Then again, he always had a rather gloomy aura about him. Perhaps that was just his natural expression.

She could catch a rare smile, even a laugh whenever he used a device she could only describe as impossible. It was flat and rectangular, roughly the size of his hand. Usually, it was plain black, but it could suddenly light up and glow in all sorts of colours! A few days later, she found that the black device on his desk had a similar ability. It was much larger than the one he carried around, which allowed her to observe it in more detail. Whenever he opened it, it displayed a wide variety of clean letters and images. Some of them looked a bit like drawings, but most she couldn’t quite make out. She hoped he would leave it open one day so she could get a closer look. But unfortunately, that never happened - at least not whenever she checked.

One thing that made the repeated journeys particularly special was the multitude of sounds that rang through the upper passageways. Sometimes, the walls would carry the distant thumps of steps and the soft murmurs of a voice. Other times, they would make all sorts of mechanical sounds she had never encountered before.

And one time - just once - they did sing.

The moment she heard it felt like a dream. A clear, high melody unlike anything she had ever heard. As she drew closer, she noticed a second, deeper melody, with underlying layers that gave the tones additional depth. It gave her goosebumps all over.

When she entered the room, she found the Titan sitting at the black, slim table, tapping down an array of long, white keys that must have been hidden before. Apparently, the black table was no mere table at all, but an instrument! With every key he pressed, a tone rang out while each key produced a different note. There were black keys , too, on top of the white ones, that produced somewhat slanted notes. The way his hands danced up and down was graceful, almost like a performance.

His fingers seemed to be moving on their own, never missing their aim nor colliding with each other.  And while they were quickl and purposeful, they moved fluidly as water, applying only as much pressure as needed.

Never would she have imagined that an entity of such monstrous proportions could move so gently. That they could create something so beautiful.

Bertholdt

In recent days, Bertholdt hadn’t felt much like playing the piano.

Usually, it was one of the few things he practised regularly and without complaint. Pouring his everything into a song was one of the best ways to clear his mind. And that was very much in disorder right now. Still, he couldn’t quite bring himself to hit the keys again. He partly blamed the exercises he’d been given – to him, being forced to chew through one classical piece after another was the bane of musical education – but partly, he was afraid that whatever weird phase he was currently going through had affected his playing, too. He had already slacked off at school and Tennis. Playing piano was one of the last things he felt comfortable doing.

He opened the new music book he’d received last session and ran a hand over his face.

Beethoven. Again.

Groaning, he snapped the book shut before sitting down and pressing the power button. The next test was already next week, so there was no room for excuses anymore.

Perhaps it would help to start with some older, simple pieces that felt comfortable with.

From a low drawer in his desk, he pulled out a slim, booklet with a worn cover and flipped through it. The pages fell open on a spot that had been used many times.

‘Solas – Jamie Duffy’

Yeah, that one felt right.

He positioned his hands and feet and relaxed his shoulders. Then, he took a deep breath.

The opening arpeggios felt like an old friend. Even though he had not played the piece in years, his fingers and feet remembered as if it were yesterday. The broken chords and modulations returned instinctively - a shift in voicing, a new cycle, a tiny suspension. Balancing the dynamics came easier this time. It seemed as if the practise had paid off after all. His movements were more fluid now, the fear of missing a key gone. This time, it felt as if the piece wanted to sing for itself. And he let it.

When he reached the final cadence, he let chord linger. It faded softly, like the light of the setting sun, and he drew it out until the last overtone dissolved, waiting for the room to fall silent once more.

A single, sharp sound came from somewhere behind him - so soft he might have missed it if not for the silence. It reminded him of scraping paper, or the faint crunch of dry leaves, but shorter. Lower. If he had to name it, he'd almost say it was a...

Sniff?

He turned instinctively, not even knowing what he was looking for. It was probably nothing anyway.

He was about to go and take a closer look when his mom peeped through the door.

“Bert, would you mind using the headphones? It’s already 8 p.m., and you know the neighbours.”

“Really? I’ve already turned the volume down.”

She gave him a look that left no room for discussion.

“Please?”

“Sure.” he groaned, saying nothing else, waiting for her to close the door again. She knew he preferred privacy when he was at home.

She lingered a moment longer. “Are you sure you’re feeling alright? You’ve been awfully quiet these days.”

“I’m always quiet.”

She wasn’t persuaded.

He sighed, not feeling in the mood for this kind of conversation right now. “I’m fine, really. Just some winter blues I guess.”

“It’s only October. Sure you’ll be fine?” Why don’t you hang out with Reiner more?”

“I’ve told you he’s going out with Krista now. He’s busy with more important things.” Friends, he was about to say.

“Don’t be like that. I’m sure he can make time for his best friend if you just asked him.”

“And spend the evening listening to him babble about butterflies in the stomach? No, thanks. Not gonna happen.”

He turned back to the piano, plucking in his headphones and glancing over his shoulder.

“Can I continue practising now? Mr. Bozado will test me next week.”

“Of course, my dear. I’ll bring you some tea later.”

“Sure.”

Once the door closed, he quickly scanned the bookshelf before opening his exercise book to ‘10. Sonata in G major, Op. 14 No. 2’.

It might have been his imagination, but he could have sworn something bright had just flashed behind the ivy pot.

Annie

Much to Annie’s chagrin, Bertholdt didn’t make any music in the days that followed. Or rather, he did, but without sound. It was very strange at first, to see him press the keys in silence, but she guessed it had something to do with the black headband covering his ears. Sometimes, he would stop abruptly, his face scrunching in annoyance. He would then repeat the same string of taps over and over with increasing speed. Apparently, he was training the movements like muscle memory, because many times he would just touch the surface in the correct pattern without even pressing down.

Whenever he played, she noticed that his overall mood seemed to shift. Unfortunately, her hiding spot didn’t give her a good view of his face, but she could tell from his posture that he was more at ease. His shoulders relaxed, and his hands moved fluently. Even the hardness on his face would fade, if only for a limited time. Sooner rather than later, his usual, irritated expression returned - sometimes, when he looked at his desk, and sometimes when he stared at an idle spot on the ceiling.

He was undeniably down. Well, as "down" as a hundred-inch Titan could be. But his hanging neck and lumbering steps made clear that he was having a hard time.

And as crazy as it sounded, she felt pity for him. The Titan. The more time she spent observing him, the more she began to relate to him like any ordinary person, even though he was anything but. She didn’t even know anything about him, and what little she had observed, she barely understood. Still, with every little quirk she discovered about his daily life, she somehow felt just a little bit closer to this entity of another world. The fact that he displayed familiar emotions and behaviours made the wildest parts of her start to hope that maybe, just maybe, she wouldn’t die instantly if she ever were unfortunate enough to get caught.

It must have been that empathy, she would think later, that ultimately made her careless.

Chapter Text

Bertholdt

It was the first Friday of October when the much-dreaded moment made itself known in the form of black Helvetica on a pop-up message.

‘Predictions are online.’

Bertholdt paused his current playlist and put his phone next to where he was lying on the bed. Then he stared at the ceiling for a moment. How he wished he had muted the class group chat.

There goes my lazy weekend.

He could simply ignore it. The results would be received on Monday anyway. It wouldn’t make a difference.

It didn’t leave him in peace.

He ran a hand through his hair, then signed into their school’s portal. The moment he opened the results, his phone slipped and hit his face.

“Ack! Shit. How stupid can you be.”

He blindly groped for his phone before looking at the results again.

CDD. There went his plans for studying Law, at a decent uni no less. He’d be lucky if anywhere past clearing even looked at that. Even Music would be tough. He’d need to ace the audition to stand a chance.

At least I don’t need to bother for applications anytime soon.

Annie

When Annie had thought that Bertholdt’s mood had been bad before, today it was borderline murderous. Something about his aura screamed ‘Don’t you dare bother me’ in letters so big that even watching him from her hiding spot made her stomach churn. Whatever that book with the strange symbols contained must have been a bane of his existence, because the longer he stared at it, the more his jaws ground in frustration. Even the way he chewed his dried food was slightly more savage than usual.

She considered retreating for today. Her guts were telling her that something about him was off. But the fact that he was magically spinning the pen in his hand was enough to keep her rooted in the pot. Granted, he often spun pencils when he held one. This pen however was different to the ones he used for writing – symmetrical and without lead - and he performed a whole lot of intricate moves with it! The quick spins and seamless motions had her utterly spellbound. It was as if the pen had a will of its own. He wasn’t even looking at it in the first place!

She wondered if she could learn this at home, or if it required a particularly annoying book first.

Every now and then, his gaze flicked to a sheet of paper beside the notebook he’d been writing in, while his head sank deeper against his other palm. Over the span of a minute, he slumped lower and lower onto the desk until his face was buried in his arm, while the other kept spinning the pen above him.

She would have laughed at the sight, if that hadn’t been her death sentence.

A pair of feet sounded on the stairs outside the room. While Annie was quick to notice his approaching mother, the Titan practically jumped out of his skin when the door opened. In her hand she held a small tray with sliced fruit.

“Bert, dear, I brought you some snacks. Can’t see you chewing on nothing but dried meat any longer.”

“Thaanks.” He said in a tone that didn’t say ‘thanks’ at all.

“What’s up with you today? You’re even grumpier than lately.”

For a while, he said nothing. Then he sighed deeply and pushed the pen aside, silently handing her the sheet of paper. When her eyes reached the bottom, they widened in surprise.

“My goodness!” She covered her mouth.

“I know it’s bad. No need to be so dramatic…”

“Bert, you…” She looked at him with a mix of worry and sadness. He hadn’t even glanced at her since she entered the room.

“It’s ok, dear, I know you didn’t have it easy last year. You don’t need to take that path. You can still try something else if –“

“But I don’t want anything else!!” He snapped with such venom that Annie practically jumped against the ivy leaf. Even his mum stepped back. The anger in his eyes disappeared immediately.

“I’m sorry..” he muttered. “I didn’t mean to…”

His mother must be a truly patient and loving, Annie thought, because when she approached him and laid a hand on his shoulder, she acted as if nothing had happened.

“I know all you’ve wanted was to follow in our footsteps. But I won’t blame you if you don’t. Noone will. All I want is for you to be happy, and I’m sure that’s what your father would have wanted, too.”

“Please stop talking about him as if he were dead.”

She paused for a moment, eyeing him up.

“Bert, we’ve talked about this. You know he won’t be coming back as much as I do.”

He offered only silence, and meaningfully looked into the opposite direction. His mom sighed in defeat.

“If you want it, and I mean if you really want it, you can always reapply next year. But you’ll have to give it your all then. And I’d rather have you happy than burnt out.”

“Ok.”

“Everything alright then?”

“Everything alright.”

“Great. I’ll be there if you need me. Don’t stay up too long.” She gave him a little peck on the back of his head, then closed the door gently behind her.

Bertholdt sighed before grabbing the pen again, and Annie took it as her cue to leave. Her heart was still on edge after witnessing that scene. That was a full day's worth of adventure.

She was already turning her back when she heard it: a subtle clack of something falling to the floor, then an exasperated groan and the shriek scratching of the chair against the boards. When she chanced one last glance over her shoulder, the impossible happened.

The Titan had disappeared without a trace.

Huh?

Annie blinked in confusion, searching the room in vain. He couldn't have just disappeared into thin air, could he? But she hadn’t heard him leave the room, either.

Was he trying to squeeze himself under the shelf? Was that even possible?

Without thinking twice, she crawled a little further forward, peeking just over the cold porcelain rim to get a better view down the bookshelf.

As if to answer her question, the Colossus by the name of Bertholdt rose from the depths like some primordial god until he was face-to-face with the Borrower - perfectly on eye-level.

Bertholdt

“Bloody hell.”

Bertholdt couldn’t believe his eyes. Kneeling in the ivy pot a mere hand’s length in front of him was a tiny, blonde, tiny human staring right back at him with wide doe eyes.

He blinked. Then he blinked again. He must be hallucinating. But the illusion didn’t fade. It stayed frozen without batting an eye, still as stone like a glitch in reality.

His mind scrambled to form words, to process the impossible. He could practically feel the cogwheels lock together until a single thought forced its way through the cracks.

A girl. A tiny little girl was living in the ivy pot.

“W…wha-“

Then, as quick as a mouse, she bolted. His eyes barely tracked with the movement when the figure jumped down the back of the pot and darted behind the row of books.

“H-hey, wait!”

He quickly moved to the other side, praying he didn’t lose sight of her. Fortunately, the sides of the shelf had wide gaps that allowed him to see through.

There, in the opposite corner of the shelf, sat the little person, now hunched and trembling all over.

“hey…” he tried to keep his voice as soft as possible. She jumped in a yelp, shocked to see him looming now from the other side. Her gaze flitted frantically, searching for an escape but finding none.

“S-sorry I didn’t mean to frighten you. Are… are you alright?”

He was trying to get her attention, but she didn’t seem to hear him, likely too afraid to listen.

“Can I… uh… help you or anything..? You want to get off the shelf, right?”

She stilled. Then her head moved up and down – as if nodding slowly. No, her gaze was swivelling from the edge of the shelf to the desk below.

“uhm.. I’m not sure what you’re thinking, but I don’t think that’s a good idea… please, I can take you down if you want, just let me get - “

Without another warning, she bolted straight for the edge.

“W-WAIT!!”

Annie

Annie’s world all but crumbled the moment she locked eyes with the Titan.

She had been seen. After all the precautions and all her years of training, she would meet her end right there and then, at the hand of the most dangerous creature on Earth.

Her father had been right all along.

She wanted to move. To scream. To close her eyes to whatever miserable fate lay before her. But her Borrower instincts hit her full force, the fight or flight instinct telling her to stay still and rely on her camouflage. They didn’t know that it was useless. That he wasn’t going to be fooled like a marten or lose interest like a cat. Already, his eyes were raking over her with the wildest mix of disbelief and curiosity.

His mouth opened slightly. “W-wha…”

When the soft breeze of his breath washed over her, she finally found the will to move.

Unfortunately, there was no real shelter behind the row of books. She was grimly reminded of that fact when the large shadow moved and blocked the light from right next to her. She needed an escape plan, and quick, but the entryway several boards lower. If she attempted to climb down, the Titan would snatch her like a berry. But if she stayed, it was only a matter of time before he lost patience.

“- want to get off the shelf, right?” The Titan’s words lit a spark. As daunting as the drop to the desk was, it was her only chance. If she used the moment of surprise to leap to the desk and then to the floor, she might make it to the cabled door in time. She had jumped from she laurel bush once when a crow had attacked her. It was a similar drop, though cushioned by grass and leaves. This surface looked unforgiving in comparison.

“uhm.. I’m not sure what you’re thinking, but I don’t think that’s a good idea… please, I can take you down if you want, just -“

Hell, no.

She didn’t think twice. No way in hell would she let him take her down like this. Not without a fight - or flight, as in this case. She dug her heels in and ran.

The booming voice of the Titan followed instantly. It took all her strength not to trip from the pain in her ears.

Then she reached the rim and leapt, arms spread wide. For a moment, she was flying, free as a bird. Her guts flipped in the weirdest directions while the air rushed past her face.

All the air was knocked out of her lungs, and a grim voice in her mind told her that she’d hit the ground far too soon.

“Shit. That was close.” A powerful voice came from above, vibrating through the air and the ground below her. The ground that was far too warm and pliant to be the desk.

Gods above.

She couldn’t stop her body from shaking when she took in her surroundings. The grooves on the palm, the fingers curling up into a wall. The heat radiating from the surface. The quick, powerful heartbeat beneath it.

Slowly, forcefully, she turned to face her captor. Her guts threatened to leave her the moment she met the Titan’s eyes. They looked as though they had never beheld something so precious and delicate – as if he wanted to hold her prisoner just to stare forever.

She had always been tiny. She knew that. But never had she felt like it so acutely as when she met those eyes.

“woah..” His heavy breath washed over her. Then she was lifted closer to his face. “I didn’t know tiny people existed. I mean, I’ve read a ton of books and stuff, but I would never have imagined - ”

Annie couldn’t quite listen to his words. The moment he opened his mouth to speak, all she could see were his teeth. Up to this day, she had not seen him eat any much – just some snacks here and there. However, there was no telling what he consumed at mealtimes.

His mother had mentioned meat earlier…

Oh gods, why did she deserve this?

“- just can’t believe how small you are. You’re really just a handful. Got it? Handful.”

His lips parted for the widest grin she’d ever seen on him, revealing the full row of teeth.

It was the final push to her panicking heart.

When Annie woke up the next time, she wished she hadn’t.

Everything was wrong. The ground felt far too soft, almost swallowing her. The ceiling was far too far away. And a face staring down at her that was far too titanic.

“H-hey…” he said in a low voice. Unlike before, his expression wasn’t solely unbridled curiosity anymore. Much to her bewilderment, he looked primarily worried.

Cautiously, as to not alarm him of her intentions, her eyes flicked sideways. Apparently, the Titan was sitting on the ground next to the bed. His hands were currently out of sight, but his shoulders alone were forming a solid wall. In every direction, the vast expanse of the bed left her exposed. She was out in the open again, alone with nothing but the Titan.

His position shifted, so that he was less looming.

“I’m uh… I’m sorry about earlier. I must have made a horrible first impression. Guess I was a bit taken by surprise there, which made me sputter all sorts of nonsense. That stupid joke was just embarrassing.”  

Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed him raising an arm to his neck. She scooted away on instinct, and he noticed with a flicker of bewilderment, prompting him to stop mid-motion and slowly lower his arm once more.

“Sorry. I suppose this must be a lot to take in.”

Yeah. Yeah, you are.

It might have just been her imagination, but when he increased their distance, it felt like he did it on purpose. It might have been just a fraction for him, but to her, the difference was immense.

He cleared his throat before and cast a sidelong glance, almost as if he were embarrassed.

“I… uh… I shouldn’t have held you like that, keeping you against your will. I hope you’ll forgive me.”

Huh?

When he glanced at her, she was utterly baffled to see an expression that was nothing short of insecure. For a moment, he looked much like a boy expecting to be chided. By.. her? What was going on here?

When she didn’t find the words to speak, he seemed somewhat disappointed.

“Well, I can’t blame you, really. I was just really surprised is all. I had never heard of tiny people like you, let alone seen one.”

More silence.

“Do you… comprehend me? Can you show me a sign that you understand?”

Annie’s thoughts swirled like a nest of agitated wasps. Should she really talk to him? Would he use it against her? To this point, he had not harmed her in any way – her near heart-attack aside. Could he actually be trusted?

“Please..?” His eyes were almost pleading now.

A tiny nod. It was all she could muster.

His eyes widened immediately, his expression shifting from worried to excited in the blink of an eye.

“So, you speak. What a relief.”

Now that she had crossed the point of no return, the questions bubbling in her head came up with full force. One, in particular.

“So, you… you won’t… you won’t devour me?”

“De-“ his voice failed him, his mouth hanging open as if he’d seen a ghost.

“You can’t be bloody serious, can you?” He was glaring at her with such intensity that she hardly dared say yes. The look on her face must have told enough for him to understand.

“Good heavens.” He pulled a hand down his face. “No wonder you panicked… Alright. Sorry for asking you this, but why on Earth would you think that?” The rising volume made her nervous again. His voice was so loud when he didn't lower it on purpose.

“I was told that T-Titans were dangerous a-and no-one would ever come back to tell a story and –“

“Wait a moment. Titans? That's what you call us?”

“Y-yeah?”

His teeth then flashed into a grin. It took all her willpower not to faint again.

“We’re humans, little one. Humans. Not Titans.”

Not... titans?

“So you’re... not… bloodthirsty and cruel?”

He shook his head no, the amused smile still lingering on his features. It lost some of its predatory edge though, instead offering something almost soft.

“B-but you’re a carnivore, right? I saw you eat that m-meat.”

For a moment he looked as if he despised himself.

“Well, yes, I can’t deny that, but we’re no cannibals. We're no monsters.”

When she didn't seem convinced, he lowered his head just a fraction, offering a warm, reassuring smile.

“I assure you, I mean you no harm. I’m just another average student trying to survive A-Levels.” He flashed a shy grin.

Annie had no idea what ‘A-levels’ were, but if they posed a threat to a Titan, they must be truly brutal.

“What’s a student?” the question left her before she could think better of it. Regret followed immediately when it broke his former, benevolent expression.

“Uhh.. what?”

She wondered if he might have offended him and if so, what the penalty was. Too late to change anything about that, though.

“I was asking… what a student was.”

“Uhm…” he was looking at her like she was something, well, out of his world. “It’s a… person who goes to school? You know, taking classes and stuff? Doing homework? Writing exams?”

She shook her head, not finding her voice anymore. In the back of her mind, she felt the urge to ask more, to dig deeper, to finally give way to the pile of questions that had built up ever since she first set foot in this world.

But she couldn’t bring herself to it. Her instincts were still on survival mode, halfway expecting him to drop the charade and turn into a predator at any moment.

When he lowered his head to take in more of her details, she did her best to keep breathing.

“I’ll be blunt. I am extremely curious about you. I've read my share of fiction and fantasy stories but... tiny people? I would have never dreamt of such a possibility, least of all here in my room." He huffed a laugh, and she had to squint at the rush of air. "Hell, a major part of me still insists that I'm hallucinating."

She could see in his eyes that he wished to come even closer, but much to her relief, he remained where he was as if held back by invisible powers. "So, if you don’t mind, I’d like to learn about you. You can ask me anything you want in return. How does that sound?"

“So… you want a bargain?”

“That sounds… somewhat dramatic. I’m not a demon or anything.”

She wasn’t sure what he was talking about. But much to her relief, he didn’t press it.

“Look. All I want is to get to know you better. Right now, I can see that you’re still quite scared of me, which is perfectly understandable. But if possible, I would hope we could become friends? If that’s alright with you, of course.”

She hesitated before speaking up again.

“If I agree, will you let me go?”

The question took him aback, and she couldn't help but be thankful for the added distance.

“Why, of course. I’m not keeping you here against your will, if that’s what you mean. I can leave the room immediately if that’s what you’d prefer. You just need to say the word.”

Annie could hardly believe her ears.

“You would.. really do that?”

“Yes, really. Though I must admit that I’d really hope to see you again.”

She pondered for a moment, still caught between reason, instinct and the overwhelming urge to satiate her need for answers about this strange world. The idea was both scary and exciting. A Titan as a friend? Has that ever happened before? Was that even possible?

“I… don’t know what ‘friendship’ entails.”

His eyes widened with something almost like worry.

“You… don’t have a friend?”

A little shake of her head.

He smiled then - a gentle, encouraging smile.

“To be honest, I’m not really sure either. Only ever had one.”

Annie wasn't sure if he really meant it, or if he just said that to gain her sympathy. It didn't really matter though, because he was clearly trying hard to make her feel comfortable. She could see that now in his actions, and feel it in the warmth of his smile. If he had any ill intentions, he would have shown them by now. 

“Okay…” she said, more to herself than anyone else. Then she surprised him by standing up and facing him directly.

“I’m in.”

He couldn’t suppress a grin.

"Well. I'd say it's settled then." He carefully raised a hand and, with glacial speed, extend his little finger towards her.

"My name's Bertholdt. Bertholdt Hoover. But you can call me Bert. Or anything else if you wish."

She looked at his finger with a mix of fear and confusion, as if expecting it to lunge like a snake. When a few moments passed, she hesitantly extended her own pinkie to touch his.

“I’m Annie.” She stared at the finger for a while longer before craning her neck to meet his eyes.

“Just Annie.”

Chapter Text

Bertholdt

Bertholdt couldn’t remember the last time he had been this tired in class. After the previous evening’s events, he hadn’t got an ounce of sleep. Too many questions were swarming through his mind - where the tiny girl came from and if she possibly lived close by, perhaps even somewhere in their house. He spent half of the night researching about tiny people, but all he found were a bunch of children’s books and their adaptions. There was not a single hint on the actual existence of tiny humans.

To be frank, a significant part of him still believed that it had all been just a dream. That he had only imagined her from the beginning. It didn’t explain the vivid memory of her, though. The ghost of her touch, her faint pressure of her weight in his hand, still lingered in the centre of his palm. It was as if her form had been imprinted on his skin.

Hopefully, she would come back soon. He just prayed he hadn’t scared her off for good.

For what must have been the hundredth time in the past twenty-four hours, he ran a hand over his scalp and grabbed a fistful of his hair. He must have lost a significant amount of hair by now.

His teacher must have mistaken the gesture with him pondering over an equation. He didn’t even notice him until the man was standing right in front of his desk.

“Trouble?”

The deadpan voice made Bertholdt jump in his seat.

“N-no. I’m fine. Just need some more time.”

The short man looked at him with piercing grey eyes. Even standing, he wasn’t taller than Bert, who was seated at his desk, and yet he was effectively staring him down. For a moment, Bert could feel that gaze going right through his façade, before the teacher glanced down at the exercise book that was still blatantly empty. A derisive snort was all the acknowledgement he got before the man walked off again.

Bertholdt released the breath he’d been holding. He was already on Mr Ackermann’s bad side, everyone who didn’t pass their GCSEs was. To him, there was only two types of people in this world. Those who excelled at it and those who were a waste of his time. There was no questioning which side he was on.

Normally, he would have been terrified by a confrontation like that. He was always nervous around him, even though he barely reached his chest while standing. Apparently, size was not everything if you could make it up with sheer composure – or, as in his case, the spirit of a harpy paired with the compassion of a rock.

Today, however, he couldn’t care less. Despite his fatigue, Bert hadn’t felt this excited in years. He wondered if he would see Annie again today. He was very tempted to skip tennis after school.

Lost in thought, he started to doodle a little figure with a ponytail. From what he recalled, she had worn simple, practical clothes with a little bag slung around her shoulder. He hadn’t caught the colour of her eyes. Next time, he’d have to pay more attention to that.

He then added a shy smile to her face.

Hopefully, he’d see her smile soon.

Perhaps if he’d paid attention for a second, he would have noticed the intensity of his teacher’s glare over his shoulder. Or the way the man inhaled sharply. Or the way he pulled out his paper fan with no shortage of drama. Perhaps, he would even have noticed the rest of the resit group watching the scene unfold, hands clamped over mouths to suppress giggles.

What he did ultimately notice, was the merciless smack! against his neck.

Annie

Annie couldn’t sleep all night, but it didn’t bother her in the slightest. With the break of dawn, she was already up and about, brimming with energy and excitement. She had actually survived an encounter with a Titan - even made friends with him! She couldn’t wait to ask him all those questions swirling in her head.

Today was Tuesday though, which meant that he might arrive late because of tennis. If she had bad luck, she wouldn’t be able to see him at all. It was in moments like this that she wished her father was privy to her actions, but she knew better than to tell him the truth. The risk that he wouldn’t allow her to leave the house again was simply too great.

So, she could only go out exploring during the day, under the pretence of going outside. The fact that she had returned late last night had already raised questions. Luckily, her father believed her when she said she had fallen asleep in the Great Ivy, but it had been a close call. He had already remarked that she spent more time outside than usual.

‘I simply enjoy the autumn colours these days’, she had said. ‘Plus, the cold doesn’t bother me as much anymore.’

There had been a touch of suspicion in his eyes. But then again, he always looked suspicious of everything.

When Wednesday afternoon arrived, Annie didn’t hesitate to climb up the Wall. He had spent the whole of the previous day waiting for the moment she could finally speak to the Titan without the sobering thought of imminent doom. It was a whole different story however, once she was back in the room. The moment she emerged into the bookshelf, the moment she beheld the enormous figure of the room’s resident sitting at his desk, her instincts were right back in charge. Doubt started to pool in her mind. Was it really safe to approach him again? What if he lied when promising he meant no harm? What if it was a trap?

Ultimately, she opted to observe him just a little longer before revealing herself.

The first change she noticed was that he seemed considerably more tired than usual. Every so often, his eyes would fall shut, his head sinking deeper into his palm. Then he’d jolt awake, straighten his posture and glance quickly towards the ivy pot. It was a good thing she had chosen a different hiding place this time - behind the row of books on a lower board.

Whenever he looked to the shelf, his expression was undeniably sad, as if disappointed that he did not find her there. He had said himself that he was extremely curious about her, so it wasn’t much of a surprise. Surely a person that looked that sad couldn’t have bad intentions?

She gathered her resolve, ready to speak up – just as he stood from his chair. Towering legs swept past the shelf as he walked towards his bag. It didn’t elude her that his steps were distinctly slower than usual, his eyes meticulously scanning the ground as if expecting her to just be standing there.

The idea alone was demeaning. As if she’d be that stupid!

When he knelt down to fetch another booklet, she noticed a large, red mark stretching across his neck like a second collar.

“What happened to your neck?” she finally spoke up, trying to ignore the hammering of her heart.

He didn’t hear her.

“Bertholdt?”

No reaction.

“Bertholdt!!”

A jolt went through the gargantuan body, then his head shot around with wide eyes, the previous exhaustion washed away in a blink.

It took him a second to find her on the lower shelf.

“Annie! You finally came back!”

The moment he turned and shot up to his feet, she started to believe that she’d just made a grave mistake. Confidence was a despicable traitor, she realised the hard way, because the moment he dropped into a crouch, it took all her willpower not to bolt straight back into the wall.

If he had noticed that his movement alone blew the bangs from her face, he didn’t show.

“I was starting to believe I had only imagined you. Where have you been?”

“Uh… h- home… I guess…” she was still busy collecting the pieces of her mind.

“Home?" He looked as though that word were new to him. "I didn’t get to ask you last time, but are you living in this house by chance? I figured you came here through that power outlet, right?"

He gestures to the socket somewhere behind her, and it took her a moment before she processed the situation.

Oh, right, he was waiting for an answer.

“Uh.. our house is somewhere below this room, yeah." She wondered if she had already revealed too much about their home’s location, but thankfully, he didn’t dig any further.

“Our? So, you’re not alone?”

“Y-yeah. I’m with my father.”

He blinked in surprise, and when his mouth opened, she knew what he'd ask next. Only her father? Why not with her mum, too? What happened to her?

Instead of all that, he silently closed it again and resorted to a warm, knowing smile.

“I’m glad to hear that. I was worried you might be living on your own. You seem awfully young for that.”

“I’m not a child anymore. I turned thirteen last month.”

“Really? I thought you were younger, given how small you are.”

She rolled her eyes in annoyance, and though he tried to look apologetic, he couldn’t hide the crafty smile playing on his lips.

“Sorry, that was rude. I shouldn’t have said that” He instinctively scratched his neck but flinched immediately at the touch.

“What did you do to your neck? It’s practically glowing red.”

“Even still? It’s been a day already…” He looked a bit uncomfortable. “My maths teacher caught me slacking off during class. I’m afraid he doesn’t take it kindly.”

“Ouch…”

“Yeah. That it was. Plus, I got extra work to do.” He gestured to the booklet he was holding.

“So this work you keep doing, it’s for your teacher? For classes?”

“Yeah, it’s homework for school. I’m currently taking classes for A-Levels.”

Her look spoke volumes.

“It’s uh, like a big test of everything you’ve learned? It’s the hardest exam in school, but also the most important one for our future.”

“So… you visit those classes to learn things?”

“Yes, exactly. I’m primarily taking classes to prepare for the test. Plus maths resits, because I failed my GCSEs. And the resit last year wasn’t successful either…” He seemed to remember something before adding “GCSEs are, uh, another important set of exams.”

“What exactly is this ‘maths’?”

His eyes perked up in bewilderment. “You don’t know what maths is?”

“I didn’t know what ‘school’ is up until now.”

“Point taken.” He then threw his head back, looking at the ceiling with mock drama.

“Bloody hell, you’re so lucky. I envy you.”

“Is it really that bad?”

“I assure you, it’s the greatest torture known to humankind.”

She didn’t comment immediately. “Actually, it sounds pretty cool.”

“You're kidding me?”

“W-well maybe not that torture thing you mentioned, but, having a place where you can learn new things every day. I wish I had that, too.”

For several moments, he only blinked at her dumbfoundedly, then his expression changed to something almost like regret.

The next moment, he seemed to have an idea.

“Well, I can’t exactly take you to school with me, but if you’re so interested about it, how about I show you?”

He had not even finished the sentence when, without warning, he flopped his hand down in front of her feet. It came so quickly that she stepped back on instinct.

Warily, she eyed the open palm offered to her. A good part of her wanted to bolt at the sudden proximity.

“I uh… I’ll think I’ll pass.. thanks.”

The disappointment lining his face was almost painful to watch.

“Don't trust me yet? That’s fine, I won’t force you to anything, I promise.”

Without another word, he stood up again and placed the booklet on the desk. Heavy vibrations went through the ground as he then started to move the entire table.

“W-what are you doing?!” She caught her balance again.

“I’m moving the desk a bit closer to the shelf.” he said as if it was the most normal thing.

“Here. Should be easier for you to reach now, right?” He smiled down at Annie, who was still level with his shins.

“I could have jumped, too.” she nagged, but already found herself climbing the ivy. Meanwhile, Bertholdt sat at the desk, watching with awe and curiosity. He looked like he was suppressing the urge to hover around her. His hands twitched here and then, as if he was about to reach out, but thankfully, he stayed rooted in his seat.

“Is that a hook on your hip?” he asked when Annie had made it to the desk.

“Uh, yeah.” She came a little closer, showing him the object with a little bit of pride. “A real borrowing hook - a Borrower’s most crucial tool."

She'd found it in dusty corner at home some years ago. From what she'd heard, it was an original tool as used by her far ancestors. She'd taken it with her in the belief that she might be needing it to get around. Truthfully though, she hadn't used it yet since the shelf and ivy were already good enough for climbing. 

“Borrower.” He let the word linger, as if tasting the sound of it. “So that’s what you call yourselves?”

“It’s what we are, yeah.”

“And what exactly do you... you know... borrow?”

That question caught her surprisingly off guard.

“To be honest, I’m not entirely sure. My father once told me that our ancestors used to be ‘actual’ borrowers. They would frequently venture to the world of Titans to gather supplies. Food, primarily, but also materials.”

“Humans.” He corrected. “And to be frank, that sounds more like stealing to me. But I guess I wouldn’t blame you. I probably wouldn’t even notice if you ever took any of my stuff.”

For a moment, he eyed her with suspicion. “Did you ever..?”

She could feel her face turning red with heat.

“Of course not! I’m not stupid! Besides, we’re perfectly fine with gathering our own supplies outside.”

He chuckled, be it from her embarrassment or her sudden outburst, then folded his arms on the desk. Cautiously, as not to startle her, he lowered his head just a little closer.

“Well, if there’s anything you’d like, just let me know.”

“Really?”

“Really.”

“Wow…” she let the idea settle. But the offer was nice. He was being nice.

“Thank you. That’s… really nice.”

He detected the ‘but’ in her expression.

“…but?”

She thought it over before concluding,

“I don’t think there’s anything I’d need.”

That clearly took him by surprise, as if he’d expected his offer to hit the mark.

“You sure there isn’t anything you’d fancy? I mean, all this must be new to you after all, right?”

She only shook her head. For a moment, he looked almost impressed by her honesty, before he assumed his former, warm smile.

“Well, let me know if you ever change your mind. The offer stands.”

Annie only nodded, feeling a bit flustered by his kindness. When she looked back up at him, he was still holding that same warm smile. He’d worn it for their entire conservation, she noticed, yet the intensity was mildly unnerving, especially out here in the open.

“Is.. something the matter?” she asked, hoping he didn’t detect the shake in her voice. His expression shifted immediately, and he pulled away again.

“Oh, I must have been staring. How rude of me.” He was about to scratch his neck again but caught himself this time. “I think part of me still can’t believe you’re actually here. I wasn’t sure if I’d ever get to see you again after… you know… everything.” He didn’t meet her eyes while he spoke.

“Well, it wasn’t easy, that’s true. I was certain I’d meet my end, and honestly, my bones are still a bit shaky even now. But I was surprised by how… nice… you are.”

He looked almost offended.

“Oh?”

Now she was the one trying to hide her embarrassment.

“I mean, you just.. uh… had this hard edge about you all the time. But when we talked, you weren’t like that at all. You’re like a completely different person now from the one I’d observed.”

“Oh.” It dawned on him. “Yeah, the last weeks have been tough. Sorry if I made you uncomfortable. If I’d known…”

“Of course you hadn’t. That was my job after all. Well, up until the end at least.”

“I think you did a great job. It was pure luck that I noticed you.”

That made her face grow even redder. For a moment, she wondered if he was doing this on purpose. Giving compliments certainly seemed to come naturally with him.

“So…” he started, “you said you wanted to see my workbook, right?”

She was happy for the distraction.

“Yeah. Right.”

He pointed at her feet. “Actually, you’re standing on top of it.”

“Oh!” He hurried off the cover, waiting for him to open the notebook. She had jumped back onto it before he had even opened it fully, scanning the pages with avid curiosity. She couldn’t make any sense of all the numbers and letters written, but it was interesting to see anyway.

“The letters are so clean. Did you write all this?”

“Oh, no, those are printed. That is my handwriting.” He pointed at a filled-in blank. “Every line’s a task for me to solve. I need to write the correct answer into the blanks.

“Oh. I see. Your handwriting is very different. Not as clean.”

“Excuse me?”

Her shoulders flinched together, and he chuckled.

“No worries, I’m just teasing. My handwriting’s terrible.” He grinned widely.

She released a breath but allowed herself to smile along. It had not even been an hour and he was already comfortable teasing her. And slowly, just little by little, she was starting to warm up to him, too.

Bertholdt

When Bertholdt returned home the next day, he noticed Annie standing on his desk in front of the framed picture. She gave him a little wave before pointing at the other guy in a brilliant orange sports shirt.

“Is that another Titan?”

He laughed to himself as he closed the door and dropped his bag. She really got straight to the point. But he was glad to see that she felt comfortable enough to move freely now.

He carefully pulled out the chair to sit down.

“Well, hello to you, too. And actually, no. That’s a human.” He flashed a shrewd smile.

“Yeah, yeah. Human.” She waved him off, deliberately ignoring him. When she turned towards the picture again, he was mildly taken aback. Even though the photo was still out of scale, it was a lot closer to Annie's size. Close enough to make him wonder how she’d look like were she human and not a Borrower. Judging by her proportions, she'd probably still be small for a human, perhaps just about the height of his ribcage. 

“Bert? Do you hear me?”

He blinked away the thought.

“S-sorry, what were you saying?”

“I was asking you what the thing he’s holding is. I noticed one in one of your bags.”

“Oh.” He cleared his throat, trying to hide the redness undoubtedly showing on his cheeks.

“It’s a tennis racket. That guy next to me is my classmate, Reiner. We used to play together as kids, but he lost interest two years ago. I still play, though.”

“And what do you do exactly during this.. ‘Tennis’?”

“Uh.. essentially, we have a large field with a net in the middle, and we hit a ball across this field. With the racket, I mean. It’s a lot more effective that way.”

“Why would you spend your time hitting a ball with a stick?” She asked, almost perplexed.

“Great question. Sounds kinda stupid if you say it like that, doesn’t it?" He shrugged before adding "It’s just a sport, really. Trains your agility and reflexes. Keeps you active.”

“Ah. I see.” He wasn’t really sure about that part.

“Don’t you have, like, Borrower sports or something?”

“Not really. I’ve never felt the need to train my agility or reflexes. I got all the training I need when scavenging.”

Scavenging. That sounded so… primitive. Like hunters and gatherers. Could she really be living like that?

“What exactly do you mean by –“

He was interrupted by a beep from the other side of the room.

“Oh. That’s my phone. Mind if I grab it? I’ll be quick.”

“Not at all. I’ll uh… wait here.”

He gave her a soft smile before standing up. The screech of the chair legs against the parquet made her flinch visibly.

“Sorry. I keep forgetting myself.” he muttered, before turning away as discreetly as possible.

Annie watched idly while Bertholdt walked over to the bed to retrieve his ‘phone’, covering the whole length of the space in three easy steps. When he came back, he could watch her gaze travelling higher and higher with every step he took. There was no mistaking the nervousness still lingering in her bones, but there was a tinge of awe, too.

"You really are the tallest of all Ti-, uh, humans, aren't you?"

He smirked, but didn’t comment any further. With a fluid, much more careful movement, he sat back down and pulled the chair a little closer.

“I’m most certainly not the tallest human on Earth, but six foot three is above average, yes.”

“That must be like… A hundred inches or so.” She mused before grinning up at him. “But I knew you were above average from the first time I saw you! Your proportions are different from ours. More stretched, if you know what I mean.”

It was clearly not meant as an insult, but the comment stung a little more than he liked to admit.

“Well, I guess you have a point there.”

She looked as if she’d expected a different reaction, suddenly seeming insecure.

Before she could say another word, Bertholdt moved to crouch down in front of the desk. He was now almost at eye level with her, hands resting on the rim not unlike a curious child.

“If I had to guess, I’d say you’re a solid… three inches?” There was a distinctly playful touch to his smirk. Feeling debased, she crossed her arms in an offended pose.

“Borrowers are four inches tall, thank you very much.”

“I kinda doubt that holds true for your case. You’re like, the size of my index finger.” He spared a quick glance “Or maybe not even that.”

Hmpf! She huffed, then after a pause:

“I’m three point two…” she mumbled under her breath.

“Pardon me?”

“Three point two!” She almost spat. Apparently, she hated being so small, even by Borrower standards.

“You realize that’s closer to three than to four, right?”

She stuck out her tongue, and he couldn’t help but laugh. The sudden volume seemed to startle her, so he tried to cover with one hand, but only with partial success.

“Sorry. That was just too cute.” He just had to say it aloud. It had been on his mind the entire time.

“What?!” Her voice was so high it nearly hit ultrasonic. It made him laugh even harder.

“Hey! Scratch that!! I am not cute!”

Bertholdt tried to cover his face. “Sorry, it just slipped.” The indignation plastered all over her face made it really hard to focus. Judging by her tone, she genuinely meant it, though.

“Alright, alright. I won’t call you cute anymore, promise.” He tried as best to wipe the grin off his face. The last thing he wanted was to insult her for good.

The distraction of his phone ringing again probably saved his skin.

“Ah. Sorry, for the interruption. I’ll mute it.”

Another message from Reiner. He quickly discarded it before muting the phone.

The moment he pulled out the phone, there was no mistaking the curiosity sparking in those Borrower eyes. Apparently, Annie had not only never talked to a human before, she had also never encountered modern technology.

“That ‘phone’ of yours. What exactly is its purpose?”

Hah. He knew it.

He mentally prepared himself for a long explanation. Not that he minded - not when it meant he could spend more time with her. Plus, the way her little blue eyes sparkled whenever he explained something was priceless. She really was cute whenever she peppered him with questions, no matter how he looked at it.

“You can use it for loads of things, actually. I mostly use it to contact people, look up information or get from A to B.”

“Where would you go? I had been wondering that a while now”

“Uh, all sorts of places. School, mostly. Sometimes to the tennis court, or just into town. You know, for groceries and stuff.” It dawned on her in the same instant that she might not even know what a grocery was. Did they have like tiny markets too? He’d have to ask about that later.

She looked almost shocked.

“There’s that many places out there..?”

He couldn’t suppress a grin.

“There’s a lot more places I can tell you. I can show you if you’d like? On the phone, I mean.”

“Yes!! Please!” She threw her hands together. Her rather childlike eagerness surprised him, yet he had to grin even wider. Carefully, he moved his arm to place it on the desk next to her. And though he didn’t miss her cautious step backwards when he came a little too close, her reservations vanished the moment the display lit up. He opened google maps and zoomed in to their house with a few swipes and double taps.

“So, uh, see that grey block there? That’s our house. We’re located on the outskirts of town, bordering the forest. Right now, we’re sitting in this corner of the building, on the second floor. This here’s the driveway, you can actually see our car parked there. And over here is-“

“You’re moving the whole world with your finger?” He was a bit surprised by the sudden interruption. But when he looked at her, her wide eyes were practically glued to the screen. He could hardly imagine what must be going through her head.

“Well, I’m not exactly moving the world, no. Just this satellite image. It’s a picture taken from the sky.”

He could tell she didn’t comprehend half of what he said, but she didn’t seem to mind.

“You can try, if you want? To move the map, I mean.”

“Really?? You mean it?”

For the first time, she looked at him without any trace of fear. The way her wide blue eyes sparkled in unbridled joy made his breath hitch for a second.

“Yes, of course. Go for it. You can’t do anything wrong.” He moved his thumb to the side, waiting patiently until she approached the large surface that was almost twice her height. When she touched the screen, he couldn’t even feel the pressure.

“Whoa…” Her voice was so soft that he almost missed it. “This is… amazing! I’m moving the world!”

He chuckled again. Never would he have thought that someone could be so delighted over something so ordinary. It was contagious, really.

“The world is so big… there’s no end to it…”

“It’s a lot bigger than just our town. I can show you if you want?”

“Yess!” She clapped her hands.

He lifted his other arm before halting mid-movement.

“I uh- I’ll need to use both arms to zoom out. Do you mind?”

“Not at all. Go ahead!”

He could see in her expression that she had not grasped the full extent to what ‘both arms’ entailed. The moment his other arm hovered above the desk, her excitement shifted to mild foreboding. He was effectively caging her in, if unintentionally, and she realised that, too.

He stopped mid-air, uncertain.

“We can, uh, we can leave it at that if you’d prefer. I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable.”

“I.. I’m fine.” Her voice came a lot more insecure than before. He noticed a little rattle in her bones. “You can go ahead. Please.”

“Are you sure? Like, really sure?”

She swallowed nervously, then added a nod.

He swallowed, too.

“Alright. Just say the word if you want me to stop ok?”

“ok.”

He contemplated her for another moment before slowly, very slowly starting to move his arm again. It amazed him, really, how brave she was. Little by little, he began to grasp just how terrifying all this must be to her. He could clearly see that she wished she hadn’t agreed to this. That, in the first place, she was too proud to admit her mistake. Yet still, she was standing her ground despite her fear.

He tried to keep his arms wide apart, though that meant leaning in even closer.

“Are you alright?”

“Yes. It’s fine.” She was hyper-focused on the screen now. “Thanks.” She added in a timid voice.

“Of course.” He smiled warmly, even though she couldn’t see him. “So, uh… where were we? Right, the map. So, I already showed you our house. And all these other houses are our town. This is England, it’s part of the UK. And this…”

They stayed like this for a while, with Annie never ceasing to ask him about the world and Bertholdt doing his best to answer. Despite her initial fear, he could see her warming up to him with every detail he explained. And by the time the sun began to set, her fear about him being close had been all but forgotten.

Chapter Text

Bertholdt

When the bell signalled the end of another lecture on the intricacies of colonialism, Bertholdt didn’t linger any longer. Normally, he’d stay for a chat with Reiner or walk home with him, but ever since he started going out with Krista, his priorities lay clearly elsewhere. He couldn’t blame him, really. But watching the couple doing their couple-y things made his stomach twist in the most uncomfortable way.

If he bolted straight after class, at least he wouldn’t have to witness Krista throwing herself around his neck as usual, or them giggling like actors of the most underfunded teenage romance.

He was halfway down the corridor when a heavy arm slung itself across his shoulder.

“Runnin’ off again, mate? Don’t think I haven’t noticed you leggin’ it every day.” Reiner gave him a suspicious smirk. Bertholdt, for his part, tried to mask his surprise as best he could.

“You really don’t miss a thing, do you? What are you, my stalker?”

He tried to play it cool. He’d always joke around with Reiner about everything. This time however, he didn’t jump on the banter, simply shrugging it off in his typical, nonchalant way.

“Just your best mate, remember? ‘Course I’d notice if something’s off.”

Beneath his friendly smile was a worry that threw Bertholdt off-balance. He’d rarely seen him serious like this before.

“Of course.” Bertholdt didn’t know what to say.

His mate gave him a sidelong glance, eyeing him up.

“Speaking of which, you’ve been proper quiet lately. You takin’ ages to reply isn’t like you, you know? Is everything alright, mate?”

Bertholdt tried not to choke on his own breath.

“Y-yes. I’m fine, really. Thanks for asking.” He could absolutely not talk to him about his thoughts on his relationship. Not now or any other time. “I’m just busier than usual these days, is all, so I wanna head home early.” he added, which was at least part of the truth. He did want to get home early so that he could spend more time with Annie. If he were lucky, she’d come to visit again.

Unfortunately, Reiner wasn’t one to be easily deflected.

“I can tell that something’s botherin’ you. Out with it. Or… wait – is that a smile on your face? Don’t tell me. Are we talking about some-one botherin’ you??”

“What?! No! No, no, no, I didn’t say that. I - ”

Reiner suddenly stood right in front of him, grabbing him firmly by the shoulders and looking deep into his eyes.

“Come on, mate, spill it. Yer meetin’ someone?” He couldn’t remember Reiner looking at him like that ever before. The intensity of his gaze made him sweat with nerves.

“N-no, I mean, well, technically, yes, but it it’s not like you –“

“You serious? That’s bloody brilliant!!” Reiner slapped his shoulder so hard he almost lost his balance. “Why didn’t you say so earlier?!”

“Reiner, seriously, it’s not like that.“

“No wonder you’ve been off your game lately. And here I was starting to blame myself.”

“Reiner, please, if you’d just listen to me for –“

“Don’t worry, mate.” he winked at him. “Your little secret’s safe with me.” He gave him a double-tap before his attention drifted over to the end of the hallway. Krista was still waiting at the classroom’s door, half waving, half jumping for her prince.

“Gotta dash. My little angel’s waiting.”

“What? W-wait!” Before Bertholdt could say another word, Rainer was already on the go.

“Keep me posted!” he threw him a thumbs-up over his shoulder. “When it’s official, we’ll do a double date!”

Bertholdt stared after him, mouth partway open. When Krista caught his eye, she gave him a bright wave, which he returned with a shy, awkward flutter of his own. The moment the couple turned away, he let out a groan, trying to shake the chaos from his head.

“Why are you doing this to me, Reiner…”

Annie

When Annie visited that afternoon, she didn’t expect Bertholdt to be back home already. Unlike usual, she didn’t find him sitting at the desk either. Instead, he was propped up in his bed, leaning against a large pillow while reading a book. He flipped through the pages one-handed, a cookie in the other. More cookies lay on a plate upon the nightstand, along with a cup of tea that filled the room with the gentle scent of herbs. Unaware of her presence, his eyes remained glued to the pages even as he blindly reached for the cup to take a sip.

It wasn’t the first time she found him reading in bed like this. The white bandages around one ankle were new, though.

For a moment, she observed him from the relative safety of the shelf, if only to make sure the coast was clear. Even though she trusted Bertholdt’s good intentions by now – after all, he had not once tried to grab her so far – crossing the border from her world to his always came with a twinge of discomfort. Staying vigilant and always assessing her surroundings were the most important principles she had learnt as a Borrower.

Once she deemed the situation safe enough, she put her grappling hook to use and moved onto the nightstand. Of course, she could’ve simply climbed down the shelf, but using the hook was quicker. Plus, it was fun, and that was reason enough. While using the hook, she could feel like a real Borrower of old.

Once on the nightstand, hesitation seized her. Doubt sprouted like thistles among grass. From this new perspective, the full extent of their size disparity was all the more glaring, and her vulnerability painfully obvious. While on the desk, parts of his body had always been hidden from view, she could now see the way his legs seemed to stretch on forever. His torso, too, towered far higher from this angle.

Despite the progress they’d made in their last talks, the nervousness was  still seeping through her bones whenever she was anywhere near the human.

She cautiously cleared her throat, once, twice, hoping to catch his attention without having to come closer.

It didn’t work.

Sighing in embarrassment, she willed her feet forward, past the bedside lamp and the cup that rose above her by a head’s length. The smell was a lot stronger up close, effectively drawing her in. Even though most of the aromas were new to her, she could make out balm and chamomile, as well as a subtle hint of apple. There was something earthy and mellow, too. Meadowsweet, perhaps? Or could it be blackberry leaves?

She didn’t get to finish her musings when her hair started to rise on her neck. The next moment, she found a giant hand reaching straight for her.

“Yikes!”

As if dodging a hawk’s attack, she dropped to her knees in the last possible moment, clinging to the plate’s rim in a death grip as the ominous shadow loomed above.

Her outburst must have been louder than she intended, because the giant hand froze in place, fingers hovering just short of the cup.

“Annie? How long have you been there?”

She didn’t dare speak. Nor did she dare look. It was as if her eyes had been glued shut, strong instincts seizing every fibre of her form.

“Shit. You’re trembling! Are you okay?”

Even with her eyes closed, she could feel the air shift above her. When the shadow finally passed, she dared take a deep breath.

She almost yelped again when something brushed her shoulder.

“S-Sorry. I just thought… never mind. I’m sorry for scaring you. It wasn’t my intention.”

When his hand finally withdrew, the relief washed over her immediately - and with it, a wave of shame. For a moment, she hated herself for this. For giving in to her instincts. For cowering under the powerful voice above, even when it spoke softly. And for being unable to explain herself. But most of all, she felt sorry for hurting her friend, who had meant no harm.

“I’m sorry.” She muttered. “I should have called out, but… I couldn’t.”

Gathering her resolve, she slowly craned her neck up to look at the human. Her friend. She caught him removing a black device from his ear before he locked eyes with her. A flicker of worry lined his face, but he smiled gently, nonetheless.

“No need to apologise. If anything, I should. I thought using one earphone would help me hear you if you came by, but looks like I was still too distracted. I’ll be more careful in the future.”

Annie wasn’t able to hold his gaze for long. Nor did she know what to say.

“Feeling better?”

She nodded silently before slowly finding her balance. Her legs were still unsteady. She just wanted to forget about this whole embarrassing ordeal as quickly as possible.

“What…” she cleared her throat “What did you do to your ankle?”

“Oh.. well. That was… something stupid, really. I wasn’t very focused in training and ended up twisting it. It’s nothing bad. I’ll be fine in a day or two. It just twinges when I put weight on it.”

“So, you got injured during tennis?”

“Exactly. Jean, my training partner, was a bit vexed from that I ditched him last session. We were supposed to compete in the team match, and he’s dead serious about it whereas I’ve been kinda distracted lately, which is partly thanks to you.” His smile gained a sly edge, and he chuckled at her embarrassment. “But today, I had to keep thinking about something Reiner said. You know, the guy from the photo.”

Annie considered to ask more about it, but the distant, almost pained look in his eyes told her not to. It was clear that he didn’t feel comfortable about it.

“You sure get injured a lot.”

He laughed at that – a warm, honest laugh that rippled through the air.

“Guess I can’t deny that. I can still feel my neck from that paper fan.” He grinned at her.

“You should’ve seen me last month. I failed to notice when Jean served and got smacked right in the face. Reiner nearly killed him for it the next day.” He grinned at the memory, but stopped when he saw the horror on Annie’s face.

“That was a joke. He would never do that.”

“Oh. Of course.” She scratched her nape. “I remember that one. Your cheek looked pretty nasty that day.”

“Yeah, right?” his grin fell. “Wait, just how long have you been watching me?”

Annie wished she could crawl back under the plate.

“Uhm… about a month, maybe? That day was the first time I came up here.”

“And then, you started watching from the ivy pot, right?”

“Well, yeah, I had to study you, learn your schedule and habits. I had the gauge the danger you posed.”

“And how am I doing so far?” The question was supposed to be playful, yet it was more serious to her than he suspected.

“Well… let’s say you started off as the embodiment of death, and now you’re more like ‘occasionally terrifying’.”

He snorted. “I feel like I should be insulted. But honestly, I’m just glad you don’t see me as some monster anymore. And I hope I can get rid of the last doubts, too, someday.”

Annie didn’t answer right away.

“B-but I don’t mean to press you or anything. Sorry if that came out wrong.”

“No, not at all.” She looked at some spot on the ground before mumbling “Actually, I’d like that, too.”

“Pardon me? I didn’t quite catch that.”

Annie remained in thought for a moment, then clenched her fists and looked straight up to meet the human’s gaze. The fierceness in her eyes startled him enough to make him straighten from his slouch. Confusion clearly creased his brow.

“Is… something wrong?”

Annie took three steps to run up, then jumped the gap onto the mattress. All the while, she remained silent.

“Did I say something wrong?”

“No.” is all she said when she approached the hand resting next to his thigh.

The sensation of his touch still lingered between her shoulder blades. He had only intended to comfort her, and she had harshly shrugged him off. Even now, she could clearly see the way his whole body was on edge. The way his hand was tense like an overstretched string, pressing into his thigh as if trying to make it as small as possible.

He was afraid of scaring her with his mere presence, even though there was nothing he could do about it.

“Do you trust me?”

The question clearly took him off-guard.

“Well… yes, of course. But why do you…?”

The words died in his throat the moment Annie climbed onto his wrist. From there, she hauled herself onto his leg and began to climb his shirt.

Bertholdt, for his part, turned into a living statue. While he had been somewhat nervous before, it was as if every fibre of his froze solid. His hands, too, hovered uselessly in the air, unsure what to do.

“W-what are you doing?!”

“What does it look like? I’m scaling you.” She said plainly, too focused on climbing. Though the climb was easy in and on itself, the nervousness seeping through her bones made her grip much more shaky than usual.

The moment she finally reached the human’s shoulder, she slumped down in relief. It was then she noticed the bead of sweat on his forehead and the redness plastered all over his face.

“Are you holding your breath?”

As if to answer, Bertholdt released a heavy gush of air, then breathed deeply. Annie almost fell from the sudden movement but managed to grab the jumper in time.

“You, uh, you really surprised me there.”

“Yeah. Me, too.”

“Are you sure you’re alright? You look like you’d rather be somewhere else right now.”

Truth be told, he was right. Being this close to Bertholdt made her hyper-aware of every of his movements. The living surface beneath her gently swayed with every breath. Warmth seeped into her wherever she touched him. And through her legs and fingertips, she could feel the small ripples of his heartbeat. It was odd, to say the least, and flooding her senses from every direction.

“I’m fine. Just a bit nervous.” She added in a low voice.

“If it’s any consolation, I’m a bit nervous, too. I’m afraid you might fall here.”

“Nah, I’ll be fine. It’s not that much of a fall. Plus, I’ve always been good at holding on. It’s nothing compared to the squirrel I tried to ride once. Nasty thing shook me off in no time. Even bit me afterwards.”

“Really…? You tried to mount a squirrel?”

“Yeah. I’d heard stories about Borrowers riding squirrels. There must be a trick to it, though. Or maybe that one was just particularly nasty.”

“That’s incredible! Well, minus the biting part.” He gradually allowed himself to relax.

“I have to say, I’m amazed by how bold you are. I don’t think I would have been so brave if I were you. I’m still only beginning to grasp how terrifying all this must be for you.”

“Yeah, Dad always says that, too. That I’m too bold for my own good.”

“Hah. Well, I can’t argue that.”

“What?! You’re on his side??” Her outburst made him flinch, and she had to tighten her grip.

While before, his gaze had been practically glued to her from the corner of his eyes, he now looked away, suddenly shy.

“Well, to be honest, I can see his point. I mean, don’t get me wrong. I’m really glad that you revealed yourself to me and came back to talk, but it was very dangerous for you to get that close to a human.”

“But.. you’re really nice. Not at all like Dad described you. You offered to be my friend.”

“Well, yes. But you couldn’t have known that, could you? What if I’d been a bad person? Someone who didn’t care? A lot of bad things could’ve happened to you if you met the wrong human. I’m really loathe to say it, but, unfortunately, not all humans have good intentions.”

“I don’t really get what you mean. You said humans didn’t eat Borrowers, right?”

“That’s true. But humans could harm you in different ways, too.”

Annie stayed silent at this.

“Annie, would you please look me in the eyes for a second?”

“Hm?”

“Will you promise me not to show yourself to another human?”

“Not even your mum?”

“Not even my mum. Hell, especially not my mum. She’d completely freak out.”

“But… she seems nice, too.”

“Please, Annie. I know this isn’t easy, but it’s really important. I’d be very worried about you otherwise.”

“You’d be… worried?”

“Yes. Very much.”

She pondered her answer for a moment.

“Ok… I promise.”

A large form rose from the depth in front of her.

“Pinkie promise?” He offered a finger.

“What’s that?”

“Actually, it’s what we did when we introduced ourselves. You know, to sort of seal the promise.”

“Seal the promise?”

“Just humour me, please?”

“Alright.” She stretched out her own pinkie to touch his.

“Thank you. It means a lot to me.”

For some reason, when Bert’s gaze lingered on her shoulders, she could feel its warmth in her own chest as well. When the intensity became a bit overbearing, she tried to distract herself by taking in the details of the room from her new vantage. From up here, she could see almost the entire room. Though she had a similar view from the shelf, but right now she was as close to his eye level as ever before.

“To be honest, I wanted to sit on your shoulder from the moment I saw you.”

“Oh?”

“Well, perhaps not the very first moment. I was pretty terrified then. But later, when I wasn’t in immediate danger, I always wondered how the world, your world, would look from your eyes.”

“And? What do you think?”

“It looks… more natural. Like everything is meant for you. Whenever I walk on the furniture, I feel out of place. Like I don’t fit.” She pondered for a moment before adding

“Plus, it’s less dusty up here.”

He snorted. “Really? Is the shelf that bad?”

“It’s a disaster. My room is not nearly this untidy, and that means something.”

“Ouch. That hurt.”

“And it’s very bare compared to my room. There’s hardly any colour.”

“So, what does your room look like then?”

She leant back on her arms, trying to summon a picture of her room in the basement.

“It’s full of things I find outside. Dried flowers and petals, but also colourful rocks or insect shells. Just last week, I found a Robin’s plume! You wouldn’t believe how soft it is! No wonder they don’t leave for winter like the others. Feathers like would make me invincible to the cold, too.”

Bertholdt chuckled at her enthusiasm. “So, you like collecting things.”

“Only the special ones, of course. I also have a large collection of the hues of green. One day, I’ll find all the greens in the world!”

“So, green is your favourite colour then?”

“Of course! What else would be?”

“I don’t know… pink? Girls like pink, don’t they?”

“Like roses? Urgh. I hate roses. Bastards always prick me.”

Bertholdt’s shoulders shook in laughter.

“Sorry. I’m just surprised by how blunt you can be.”

She didn’t really get what he meant by that. She was only being honest.

“By the way, would you like a cookie? I should have asked you earlier. Forgive my manners.”

“Uh, sure. I was wondering what exactly it was. You eat them a lot.”

“Well, you’re in for a treat. This one’s chocolate chip. Nothing special, I know, but still my favourite.”

“What’s chocolate?”

“You don’t know what chocolate is?” He sounded almost offended.

She timidly shook her head.

“Damn. How could you even live without it?”

Annie hesitated, unsure if it was a serious question when Bertholdt’s arm moved. She instinctively tightened her grip, though this time it wasn’t necessary. He didn’t need to move his upper body to reach the cookie plate.

She watched silently as he broke off a tiny piece of cookie, proffering it to her with pinched fingers.

“Here you go.”

“Thanks.” She took the morsel. Well, morsel to him. The piece was still larger than her fists. Half was the colour of hazelnuts while the other was almost as dark as Bert’s hair. It reminded her of wet mud.

Both parts were hard as hazel.

“Are you sure this is edible?” she turned the piece as if searching for a crack to open it.

“Of course.” He took a little bite himself. “Just give it a try.”

The doubtful look didn’t leave her eyes. Then she tried the chocolate.

She almost choked on it.

“Urgh! That’s awful!!”

Bertholdt blinked at her a few times, then broke into laughter. Annie had to throw herself across his shoulder to hold on. He was laughing a lot today, she realized, now quite physically.

“Seriously? You don’t like it?”

“The taste is weird. The texture, too. And it sticks everywhere! How can you even eat that?”

“I don’t know. Practice, maybe?” He shrugged, and she yelped.

“Sorry.” He held out his other hand. “I’ll take it if you don’t like it. Would be a waste.”

She gladly handed it back to him. With a flick of his wrist, she watched him pop the crumb into his mouth before finishing the – much larger – rest of the cookie. Watching him eat so close sent a little wave of nausea through her. She still couldn’t fathom the amounts he was eating. A day’s ration for him must be like a month’s supply for them. Maybe more.

“How can you eat that much…?” the question escaped without her fully realizing.

“Hm? Why, I need to grow, of course.”      

Her mouth gaped open and he chuckled.

“Just kidding. That’s not going to happen. Or at least, highly unlikely. I’m already seventeen after all.”

“You’re only seventeen?”

“What did you think?”

“Actually, I don’t know. With how tall you are, I somehow assumed you must be, like, a hundred years old.”

“A hundred?? Jesus! I’m going to die here if you keep stabbing me like that.”

And then, Annie laughed. Not just out of shyness or embarrassed, but from the bottom of her heart. It was the first time she had laughed openly in front of him.

Once she had regained her bearings, Annie noticed that Bert had gone completely silent, as if not wanting to interrupt the moment. Even when the silence lingered, it wasn’t awkward anymore, instead filled with warmth. Then, with a voice barely above a whisper, he said,

“Say, Annie… are you still feeling nervous around m-”

A jolt went through her, as if stung by a thorn. Within the blink of an eye, Annie jumped up to her feet and bolted over to Bertholdt’s neck. Needless to say, the former quiet was snuffed out like a candle.

“Annie? W-what’s wrong?”

His question was answered when the door opened the very moment Annie hid behind his neck. With her feet finding purchase on the rim of his jumper, and her hands holding on to the short hair, she tried her best to hide.

Bertholdt’s mum walked over and sat on the edge of the bed.

“How’s your foot, dear? Still swollen?”

Annie heard the sound of water dripping into a bowl. Peeking out of her hiding spot was too risky, but it sounded like his mum was replacing the bandage.

“It’s much better already, thanks. I don’t think I need to cool it anymore.”

“You sure?”

“Yes.”

Annie hoped that would settle it. That she would leave as quickly as she’d come. She didn’t want to risk breaking her promise right after she’d made it. And though she had found a liking to her, the idea of confronting yet another unfamiliar human was making her nervous all over again.

His mum put the bowl aside before moving even closer.

“How about your neck?” she inquired.

Oh, dear.

She was now sitting right in front of him, trying to glance around his head. Annie could already see her shadow enter her periphery when Bertholdt moved his shoulders to adjust.

Perhaps Annie was clenching his hair a little too tight, or maybe the trembling in her feet was perceptible to him, too, but sure enough, Annie’s world became shrouded the next moment as if a veil had descended upon her. In utter bewilderment, she saw his fingers form a loose arch, effectively shielding her from sight while giving her space to breathe and move. To his mom, it probably looked as if he was just touching his neck.

Only now, Annie realized she was standing right on top of his tender skin. She hoped she wasn’t causing him pain.

Annie flinched in surprise when a digit – his thumb – gently pressed against her shoulders and started to draw slow circles.

“It’s fine.” He said, before adding in a softer tone. “Everything’s fine.”

Annie wasn’t sure who he was talking to. His mum seemed bewildered, too.

“Speaking of… everything.” Her tone switched from medical assessment to something more tender. ”Aside from your injuries, how are you feeling? You’ve been locking yourself in your room lately. You didn’t even come down for your favourite shows. I’m starting to worry about you. Really worry.”

“I just didn’t feel like watching TV. Plus, I’m more motivated for studying.”

“Really?” She didn’t even try to mask her disbelief.

“Yes, I… I feel much better now.”

“I’m glad to hear that.” There was a pause in which Annie assumed she smiled at him before her voice regained its more professional tone.  “I’m afraid I have to leave now. Won’t be back until Wednesday. Will you be alright on your own?”

“Yes. Of course.”

“That’s my boy.” She leaned in peck to his head.

“Mum, I’m not ten anymore…”

“And yet, you’re still my boy. Always will be.” She stood and walked to the door. Before she left, she flicked on the light.

“Don’t stay up too late.”

Chapter Text

Alder

Alder had never been someone easily deceived. From the moment his daughter began flying through chores like a hawk-moth, it was clear as daylight that something was off.

Up to this day, he still debated whether it had been wise to introduce her to the outside world at such a tender age. Annie had always brimmed with curiosity – that much was certain. At times, it took on proportions that were difficult to manage, even for him. And while he had always assumed it was just a natural phase of her childhood, it turned out those childlike traits were just a part of who she was. By now, he wondered how much longer her curiosity would burn – or if it ever would wane.

In her earliest years, she had spent nearly every day outdoors– supervised, of course. It was quite a relief when, at least in recent years, she tended to stay inside during colder days. This week, however, Annie acted as if she’d been sent right back five years. Every available minute, she’d spent outside, from dawn till dusk. That, paired with her buzzing impatience whenever she was at home, was starting to worry him.

He’d considered confronting her directly, as he usually would, but for some reason, it didn’t feel right this time. The light remarks he sent her way, asking where she was off to or what kept her so busy, were brushed aside quickly and superficially. It was clear that she was hiding something. And knowing his daughter, pressing her would only drive her away. If anything, he’d risk losing her goodwill, and that was a risk he wasn’t willing to take.

Besides, she seemed happy. Happier than usual. That, more than anything, made him hesitate.

It would be fine, he told himself. He just had to be patient. He’d raised her well enough to trust that she wouldn’t take foolish risks.

And of course, he’d warned her time and time again to stay clear of the Wall, a second, more apprehensive voice chimed in.

“I’m heading out!”

Speak of the devil.

“Where to?” he caught her in the doorway, one foot already past the threshold.

“Uh.. out? I uh.. I befriended a ladybug last time. I wanted to see if they’re still there.”

“With this weather?” he raised a suspicious brow. “It’s raining buckets, haven’t you noticed?”

“Oh.” Realisation dawned on her.

“Help me with the flour, will you? I’m sure your little friend’s hiding away right now anyway. Even a skilled Borrower like you wouldn’t find them.”

“Yeah…” she sounded as if she’d lost something dear. With tired steps, she then trudged back into the house before depositing her bag and starting to peel the beechnuts.

Yes. Without doubt, something was off. Perhaps, it was wise to keep a closer eye on her from now on.

Bertholdt

When Friday came, Bertholdt’s ankle was already feeling much better. Still, he opted to stay at home for another day, just to be on the safe side.

Knowing that Annie always waited for him to come home in the afternoon, Bertholdt spent most of the day reading their current text about the intricacies of colonialism. And while he still found himself drifting off thinking about his new friend, it was way easier to stay productive than usual. Perhaps it was due to the set time frame – after all, he wanted to make room for her in the afternoon. Or maybe it was simply because his spirits lifted more and more with every day he met her.

After his mum had left yesterday, Annie had been in a rush to leave. He hadn’t even got the chance to offer her a ride down his shoulder before she was already sliding down his jumper. Apparently, she could only stay until sunset, or her father would become suspicious. For some reason, he had always assumed that her father was privy to her visits. It did explain why he had never accompanied her though. He just hoped she wouldn’t get into trouble because of him.

Unlike usual, he decided to read on his stomach today. Partly, because he wanted to see her coming this time – he still felt guilty about scaring her yesterday – and partly, because he didn’t want to loom over her. However, he also had to admit that he wished to be see her up close this time. He hoped they could talk on eye level when she came.

If she came. Given that Annie had visited him every day over the course of the past week, he kind of assumed that she would come again in the afternoon. It was already 3 pm though, and while the sun had emerged after the rain, the sky was already beginning its slow descent. Maybe, she wouldn’t come today, and he couldn’t help but feel disappointed by that.

It was a stupid thought to take her visits for granted. He knew that. After all, she had a life of her own. Still, he couldn’t stop wondering what had kept her this time. Hopefully, she hadn’t been out in the rain. Not today, when it had been pouring down. But he couldn’t quite imagine what else she’d do either. During their talks, it had mostly been him talking about himself. He made a mental note to ask more about her next time.

Just when Bertholdt had come to terms with the idea of spending the afternoon with his studies, a familiar voice pulled his attention up from his book.

“Still reading?”

It took him a moment to spot the familiar blonde mop of hair peeking out from behind the bedside lamp. Even though he felt like she’d been at ease with him yesterday she appeared a bit cautious, especially at the start. Apparently, instincts rooted deep in Borrowers. He couldn’t blame her, really.

“And here I thought you’d never come.” He offered a welcoming smile. “And yes. I’ve got history and literature for finals, so there’s a lot to read.”

“Oh. I didn’t know it was important. Sorry for interrupting.”

He set the book aside and folded his arms beneath his chin.

“Don’t be. I’ve just finished a chapter anyway, so it’s perfect timing.” In fact, he hadn’t, but that didn’t matter.

Annie waited a moment, probably to see if he would move. When he didn’t, she crossed the gap to the mattress and slowly – cautiously - walked over to him. At times like this it was clear that she was still very much a creature of the wild, with instincts and caution guiding every move. It would take more than a week for her to truly warm up with him.

The tiny blonde surprised him by walking straight up to his bent arm and climbing onto it. She let her legs dangle while reclining back on her hands.

“Those tests are really important to you, right?” He blinked in confusion.

“What makes you think that?”

“You said it yourself. That you didn’t ‘want anything else’. It’s what you need good grades for, right?”

“Oh, so you heard that, too?” His lips turned into a thin line. “Of course you did. I’m sorry for making such an awful first impression.”

“It’s fine. Though I have to admit, I felt my heart leaving me there.”

“I promise it won’t happen again.” He bit his lips before adding, “As for my studies. I chose history, literature and music because I want to follow my parent’s footsteps. My mum works as a lawyer in international business. It’s a demanding job, and I’ve always admired her for how hard she worked to get there. Even though it means she has to travel often and hasn’t always got time for me.”

He hesitated when the next thoughts dimmed his mood, as if a veil had been draped over him.

“As for my father… he was – is – a professional musician. A very successful one. He went to Vienna to study and made a career there.”

A crooked smile lined his lips, one that was paper-thin.

“It’s also where he met his great idol and teacher, Bertholdt. Hence my stupid name. I never really liked it, but since he left last year, I kind of hate it now.”

“He… left?” Annie seemed surprised to hear that. Perhaps divorce was not a common thing among Borrowers.

“Yes.” Bertholdt’s head felt heavier than before. “My parents divorced last year. My mother prepared all the legal documents on her own and managed the entire procedure herself. Doesn’t lack a sense of irony, huh?”

“I don’t really get that divorsion-thing, but you shouldn’t hate yourself for your name. I like it.” Annie stated plainly, patting his arm. Bertholdt couldn’t believe his ears.

“You’re kidding me?”

“No, really! It sounds like bird. I like birds. Well, maybe not crows and hawks, but my best friend’s a Robin. For me at least. To be honest, he never said he wanted to be my friend, too.”

Bertholdt felt his throat tighten. Annie was the first person to actually like his name, and he trusted her honesty when she said it. The way she talked with sincerity, without the heavy layers of judgement and expectations felt like balm on a deep wound.

“You really are like a little fairy, you know that?”

“A what?”

“A fairy. Little winged beings with magical powers.”

“I don’t have wings though.”

“No, but right now, I’m wondering about that magic power.” His smile faded slightly, and he swallowed.

”You know…” he began carefully, as if treading dangerous ground. He thought about stopping, about putting the walls back up as usual. But something about her made him lower his guard. He’d known her less than a week, yet somehow he felt confident enough to tread this path around her.

“Before I met you, I was depressed for a very long time. When my parents divorced and my father left, I lost half of my family. And with it, the will to look forward. It got even worse when Reiner fell in love with a girl from a lower grade. He didn’t have much time for me anymore and stopped our regular training, too. Pretty much all of my classmates avoid me because I’m awkward, and I don’t have any other friends beside Reiner, so even though I attended school, there were days I didn’t speak to a single soul. And when mum was gone for work, I’d often spend the weekends alone. That’s when my grades dropped in free fall.”

He huffed with a dash of derision.

“Hard to believe I used to be the top of my class those days. I hardly recognise myself anymore.”

For a moment, Bertholdt felt the full weight of his sombre thoughts pressing down, pushing heavily against his confidence. It would‘ve been easier to sink back into doubt and self-loathing than to fight it. He’d let it take over many times already.

This time, however, he remembered the little Borrower keeping him company, and the change she had brought to his dreary days.

Opening up to her had cost him great courage, but it also felt like taking a real breath for the first time in years.

“But…” When Bertholdt met her eyes, he was speaking directly from his heart. “You reminded me of how it feels to laugh again. How to be happy again. For that, I’ll always owe you.”

He lowered his head just a little, so that they were at eye level. He then spoke with a voice that was barely above a whisper.

“Thank you, Annie. I mean it.”

Annie sized him up for a moment, clearly studying his closeness. Then she grinned from ear to ear.

“You’re welcome!” was all she said.

Bertholdt couldn’t help but laugh. Judging by her reaction, she didn’t understand half of the extent of what he’d just confessed. And yet, her honesty was simply refreshing. Yet again, he was reminded of how straightforward and simple one could see the world.

Besides, he thought to himself, it didn’t matter if she understood. He’d be grateful to her, either way.

“Can I climb on your head then?”

Wait, what?

“What?”

“You said you owe me. And I’d really like to climb on your head. Please?”

To say he was befuddled was quite an understatement.

“Wha- why would you want that?”

She shrugged her little shoulders.

“I don’t know. The idea just plopped up.”

“Uh.. alright then. I don’t mind. Go ahead.”

Quite literally.

Bertholdt lowered his head onto his folded hands, and Annie clapped her hands in excitement before scaling his upper arm and then his shoulder.

“You’ve really taken a liking to climbing me, haven’t you?”

“I’ve always loved being in high places. Plus, you’re a lot easier to mount than a squirrel.”

“So that’s what I am to you? An oversized squirrel?”

“No, you’re far too docile for that.”

“Docile?” He resisted the urge to jerk up his head. “So first I’m a squirrel and then I’m a dog?”

“What’s a dog?”

“What’s a – never mind.” He relaxed his shoulders again, trying not to flinch at the little steps tickling over his shoulder.

“Docile… really, you should say that to my mum. She thinks I’m more bloody stubborn than a donkey.”

When Annie started grabbing his hair, he couldn’t help to squint. It wasn’t exactly painful, but not comfortable either.

He had to admit, it felt truly strange when she was sitting on his head.

“Woah... You’re even longer than your bed.”

He wasn’t, of course. His feet only hung over the edge from where he was lying.

“Are you sure you’re alright up there?”

“I’m great! Can you imagine? I’m taller than you now! Taller than the tallest titan!”

“I’m not – never mind.”

“Can you stand up? Pleaase?”

“What?! No way, that’s far too dangerous! What if you fell?”

“I won’t! Promise!”

“I… I can’t do that. It’s too risky.”

“And if I ride on your shoulder?”

“That’s basically the exact same thing.”

He could practically hear her pout.

“I’m sorry, but I really can’t. I could carry you in my hand if you like?”

More silence.

“Would uhm… would cookies make it better? I’ve got some without chocolate this time.”

“Without chocolate?”

“Yes. Just give me a sec. They’re in my bag.”

Very carefully, he moved to the side of the bed to where his bag was. He then pulled out a long packet of biscuits and a few individually wrapped oat bars.

“I also brought some flapjacks, in case you prefer those. They’re made primarily of oats, but they’ve got different flavours. This one, for instance, has hazelnut.”

He held one of the green wrappers up for her to see. The label read ‘Giant Bar’.

“Pun intended.” He added with a smirk.

If Annie was impressed, he couldn’t tell.

“Ok. Can you make the bits smaller though?”

“Even smaller than last time? That already felt tiny. But sure, I’ll try.”

With laser focus, he broke off a piece biscuit no bigger than his thumbnail, then did the same with the oat bar. Pinching both pieces at the same time, he lifted them to her general direction. He could feel her little feet when she moved to retrieve them.

“So, what do you think?” he said after some moments of quiet munching.

“Much better than chocolate for sure. The oat thing’s nice, the cookie, too.”

“Just ‘nice’? Alright then, what would be ‘best’?”

“Blackberries, of course!”

“Of course.” He teased. “Didn’t you say you hated thorns?”

“I’m making an exception for blackberries. They’re simply the best! Sweet and mellow and perfect! Shame the season’s already over, though. The dormice got the last ones.”

Bertholdt stared off thoughtfully. She couldn’t see it, but he’d just added something to his mental to-do list.

“So where would you find these blackberries? When they’re in season, I mean. Do you mean the wild bramble behind the house? Is that where you pick them?”

“Uhm.. I’m not sure. There’s the Great Rock Ring, and the haunted house. And behind that, just before the river, is the Great Thorn Wall made of bramble and blackthorn.”

“Yeah, that’s the old shed alright. And the old fireplace. Haven’t used either since I was a kid. Nor have we tended the garden ever since. Seriously though - haunted house? Why would you think that?”

“I don’t know, I never questioned it. It’s what Dad always said. Maybe he just didn’t want me to go near it. He’s absolutely terrified of Titans. He never even dared to venture past the Wall, and he’s the bravest person I know!”

“That bad?”

“Yeah! To him, Titans are like the world’s greatest calamity. All his stories describe you as cruel, bloodthirsty and incredibly dangerous.”

Bertholdt felt his neck heat up. He really hoped her dad had only heard of such stories, or made them up himself to keep Annie safe. He didn’t want to imagine what might’ve made him believe that.

“I guess it’s a good thing we haven’t met, then.”

“Yup. He’d probably die of a heart attack if he saw you. Or, more likely, he’ll try to kill you.”

He almost choked on his breath.

“Kill me?!”

Annie didn’t sound remotely bothered, which, in turn, bothered him.

“He never takes chances when he sees possible threats. And he doesn’t hesitate when it matters. He even fought off a badger once!”

“Well… good thing I’m twenty times his size then.”

“Oh, he can be very cunning. He’d try to kill you while you sleep.”

Bertholdt subconsciously put a hand to his neck, a cold shiver running down his spine with every word she said. He’d never considered that possibility.

“Jesus Christ. Now I really don’t want to get on his bad side.”

“Nope. Wouldn’t recommend. But don’t worry. He doesn’t know of you yet. I’d notice if he did.”

“Why, that’s a relief…”

For some reason, he didn’t feel relieved at all.

He really had to change the subject, and quick. What had they even been talking about?

“So, uh… aside from berries, what else do you like to eat? Do you, like, grow your own crops and vegetables somewhere in the garden?”

“We planted a few weeds some years ago, but no, not really. We just scavenge.”

There it was again. Scavenge. It sounded so… primitive. Like hunter-gatherers. As if she had to struggle daily just to get by. He really hoped she didn’t have to live like that.

“Don’t you have, like, Borrower markets? Where you can just buy food or trade something?”

“I don’t know what ‘buying’ means, but no, we’ve got no one to trade with. There used to be some more Borrower families in the forest, but I’ve never met them. Dad said they moved away around the time I was born.”

“You’re living… all on you own then?” It was almost hurting him to even voice the question.

“Yep. Just me and Dad.”

For a moment, Bertholdt didn’t know what to say. She had told him that she didn’t have any friends, but… ono one else at all? He could hardly fathom how terribly lonely that must be. Yet Annie spoke about it so casually that it threw him off even more. Did she not realise how bleak that sounded, being secluded from the rest of their species? Or was it just him being pessimistic? What if he was just projecting his own human thoughts and feelings on the matter?

“When you say ‘scavenging’, you mean gathering supplies outdoors, right? In the garden and beyond? Isn’t that… you know… kind of tough? It sounds like very hard work to me.”

“Well, it’s work, sure, but I can’t tell if it’s tough. It’s just what we do. And it’s fun, too! Definitely better than making beechnut flour. When I scavenge, at least I find new stuff.”

“You make flour out of beechnuts?”

“Yeah? Why shouldn’t we?” She sounded a bit upset.

“I… sorry, didn’t mean it like that. I just… would’ve never thought of the idea. What else do you live off, if you don’t mind me asking?”

“Uhm… let’s see. There’s less options in winter, but we’ve still got plenty. Hazelnuts and chestnuts, rowan and hawthorn berries. And beechnuts, of course. Sunroots are nice, too, but hard to reach. Plus, some fresh greens and buds. Chickweed, for example, or clover.”

“If I’m completely honest, that sounds more like a fasting diet. Are you… Are you really happy with that? Living off what little you can find outside?”

“Of course. We have enough to get us through the cold days. It’s all that matters, right?”

“Right…”

Bertholdt found himself in a loop. This wasn’t what he’d expected at all when he had intended to learn about her life. Admittedly, he didn’t know what exactly he had expected, but certainly not… this. Any human he knew would be miserable living like that, yet Annie seemed perfectly content. The way she talked about the things they scavenged, she even sounded proud of it.

He wondered, just briefly, if she’d agree to move in with him. Surely, she’d be happier, right?

“Say, Annie. Have you ever thought about moving in with me?”

“Move in?”

“Yes. Properly, I mean. I could get you everything you need. You wouldn’t have to scavenge anymore. And I bet it’s warmer up here than in the basement, right?”

“I… I’m not sure. I like visiting you. But I like being at home, too. And I like scavenging.”

To be honest, her hesitation surprised him. If he were in her shoes, he’d have jumped at the offer.

“Is it about trust? We can work on that. And I’m sure I could make peace with your dad, too.”

“No, it’s not that. I trust you. I just… I don’t know. It simply doesn’t feel right. Don’t get me wrong, your offer’s really nice, but… we don’t need it. We’re happy with our way of living.”

Bertholdt wanted to argue, to show her how much easier things could be. He just wanted to help, right?

“But…” He was cut off by his phone buzzing beside him. He’d almost forgotten it was there. The screen lit up with a new message from Reiner.

‘Hey mate, missed you in class today. How’s your foot? Any better?’

He thought about replying but decided against it. He could wait until Annie had gone.

He’d muted it when another message popped up, followed by a winking GIF.

‘Or were you just skipping class to spend more time with your crush?’

Bertholdt slammed his phone face-down so quickly he’d have cracked the screen if it weren’t for the mattress.

“What’s wrong?” Annie inquired, startled by the sudden movement. She’d been lying on his head, playing with his hair.

“N-Nothing. Forget it.” He sent up a quick prayer that she hadn’t seen the message.

“I was wondering…” Annie then started, “That ‘phone’ of yours, how does it work? Did you build it yourself?”

He chortled a laugh. “Definitely not. I’m hopeless when it comes to anything with electricity.”

“So, it’s electric? Like a light bulb?”

“Basically, yes, just a lot more sophisticated. You’re using that at home? Electric devices, I mean.”

“For light and heating, yeah. It’s one of the main reasons we live in the house, despite being so close to the Wall. Still, I didn’t know there were more uses to electricity beside that.”

“Actually, we use it for all sorts of things. The laptop, for instance, or the alarm clock. Even the piano’s electric. That way I can play with headphones.”

At the mentioning of the piano, he felt Annie shifting onto her knees.

“But you can… play without the headphones, too, right?”

Bertholdt wished he could see her face. He could practically feel her eyes light up.

“Do I hear a wish there?”

“Yes, please!! I’m dying to hear you play!”

Bertholdt chuckled, an idea forming in the back of his mind.

“Well, in that case…” was all he said before tilting his head and gently sliding her onto the mattress. Then he rose to his feet and bowed deeply, one arm tucked behind his back. With no shortage of flourish, he let his hand glide down to her feet, fingers unfurling one by one.

“Would you like to join me for a duet?”