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Lonely and desperate bisexual M (30) seeks LOML for a day — Just for the day. You can boss me around and I'll buy you whatever you want. I whine and complain a lot so be prepared for that.
"Oh my god." Seungcheol blinks at the screen in horror. It's times like this he wishes he could become the kind of person who doesn't immediately check his phone first thing in the morning. It's too early for this. "Are you fucking–? Fuck."
Mingyu's too busy scrolling the delivery apps for something to cure his hangover to pay him any attention. He snickers when Seungcheol lets out a long, keening sound of complaint, but otherwise ignores him.
It's early Sunday after a long night of bar hopping and about four too many shots, and Seungcheol and Mingyu have just peeled themselves off Jihoon's living room sectional where they'd finally fallen asleep. Seungcheol conjures a hazy memory of Mingyu pouting at Jihoon when his boyfriend refused to let him sleep in the bedroom, insisting he had to be up early and predicting that the two of them would be up all night giggling.
Which is mostly what happened. Except a few hours in, the night had taken a turn for the worse. Jihoon had come out for a glass of water in the middle of the night, and Mingyu had rushed to catch him at the halfway point between the bedroom and the kitchen with an arm around his waist and goofy kisses pressed into the side of his face.
Seungcheol had watched pathetically from the couch, red-cheeked and wobbly where he sat. He'd just thought they're so perfect together, so in love. And then he'd thought about Jisoo and Minghao, Soonyoung and Chan. Seungkwan and Hansol.
"It's not fair," he'd whined into Mingyu's side, once Jihoon had disappeared back into the bedroom. He'd kicked his feet and wailed:
"I want that. Everyone has that. Someone to — kiss!"
and, "I'm really good at being a boyfriend. And I'm being wasted!"
and, "Even just like — for like one day, I want that."
The night had gotten hazier from there. He remembers Mingyu gasping loudly like he'd discovered electricity. He remembers him whipping out his phone and concentrating hard on whatever he was typing for what felt like hours until Seungcheol finally passed out tipped over on his side.
Well, now he knows what Mingyu had been writing. Because it turns out, the personal ad site he used sent Seungcheol a copy to his email. Of his personal ad. That Mingyu posted.
Seungcheol reads the ad again. His head falls down to meet the table with a loud clunk.
Mingyu calls out to him, soft and timid. "Okay, so don't be mad."
"I'm mad."
"Okay, well don't get madder."
"Wah, Mingyu. What else did you do?"
"I may have texted the ad to our group chat last night before I fell asleep."
Seungcheol slumps further. "Nononononono."
His phone vibrates again, and he hears Mingyu giggle at whatever new message from the chat has just come through.
Seungcheol groans and sits back up, swiping his phone off the table as he goes. The ad is still up. He reads it again.
"’Lonely and desperate—’ ‘You can be mean to me—’ ‘Buy you whatever—’" Seungcheol reads aloud in disbelieving fits and stops.
Mingyu finally looks at him, and for the first time, he looks a little chagrined.
"Aish. You make me sound like some kind of…sugar daddy."
Mingyu considers this, head tilted and frowning. "It sounds like you'd end up in more of a fin dom situation."
"A what?"
"It's like…never mind." Mingyu turns red and looks down at his phone. Immediately, all traces of shame are gone and he's laughing again. "Seungkwannie is so funny."
Seungcheol sighs and looks back down at his phone. He opens messages. Like ripping off a band-aid.
ppl who owe me money »
Gyu
[screenshot]
Jisoo
ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ
Soonyoungie
Wow hyung! Way to put yourself out there! proud of you
Jihoon
Hyung didn't post that. My dumbass drunk boyfriend did
Seungkwan
Who cares! If it works, it works. He HAS been looking pretty sad and pathetic.
Hansollie
Seungcheollie-hyung is in this chat, Boo
Seungkwan
oh my god hyung im so sorry…
i thought this was a different chat ㅋㅋㅋ
i just mean…hyung it's been six months since the breakup. you should get out there
Jihoon
it's not even an ad for a girlfriend. it's an ad for a fake girlfriend. A girlfriend-for-a-day
Soonyoung
or boyfriend!!!
don't be homophobic, jihoonie. seungcheol can fake date whoever he wants, we won't judge
Jihoon
what
Chan
hyung did anyone respond???????
Seungcheol swipes out of the app and closes his eyes, still clutching his phone. He's trying to ignore the sharp pain behind his eyes, the gross thick dryness of his mouth. He needs to get up. He needs to brush his teeth. He needs to kill Mingyu.
"Well?"
Seungcheol opens one eye to glare at Mingyu. It's like he can read Seungcheol's mind. He knows Seungcheol wants to kill him and he isn't afraid of him. That's how wrong things have gone for Seungcheol: no one's afraid of him anymore. They post embarrassing personal ads on his behalf like he's a divorced horse being put out to pasture, or whatever the dating life equivalent is.
When he mutters this out loud, Mingyu just snorts and rolls his eyes.
"You're not a divorced horse. You just got dumped," he says, waving his hand as if to encompass six of the worst months of Seungcheol's life following the complete implosion of the longest relationship he's ever had.
Then, he comes to stand in front of Seungcheol. "So?"
"So what?"
"Did anyone respond?"
"Of course no one responded. Who would respond to that? Who even looks at personal ads anymore?"
Mingyu pouts. "Did you even actually check?" He waves his hand impatiently, gesturing at Seungcheol's phone. Seungcheol just sighs and hands it over.
He sits there, sinking deeper and deeper into the couch like he's melting, while Mingyu takes free reign of his phone. After a moment, Mingyu jumps and starts dancing excitedly in place.
"Yah," Seungcheol whines. "What happened to your hangover?"
"Forget about that — hyung, you have a ton of responses!"
Despite himself, Seungcheol perks up, giving Mingyu his full attention now. "Really?"
Mingyu smirks and hands the phone back to let Seungcheol scroll his inbox. There are five responses to the ad, three of them spam.
"Okay. One of these is just asking me for photos of my feet."
"Keep going."
Seungcheol sighs, deletes the spam ones, and swipes through the remaining two emails. One of them is someone clearly just looking for a hookup, and it's not that Seungcheol is opposed to that, but the last email is what holds his attention. The subject reads 30/m/seoul — the age/sex/location format that the personal ad site requires.
All it says is:
I'll do it. Can we go to the mall? There's a new vacuum I have my eye on. Cafe on — at 10am Saturday. Red sweater.
There's no signoff, and the email is censored through the personal ad site. There's no indication as to who it could possibly be. The tone of it is rude, presumptuous.
Seungcheol stares at it for a long time. He swipes out of it, opens a puzzle game, closes it after two moves, and opens the email again. Then, feeling some odd burst of impulsive energy, he makes a decision.
"I'm gonna go."
Mingyu, looking over his shoulder to read the email, gives him a concerned look. "Hyung, I know this whole thing was my idea but…that email kind of sounds like a serial killer."
He's looking at Seungcheol like Seungcheol has just decided he's going to get a face tattoo, or go skydiving. Seungcheol just shrugs, looking back down at the email. It's really stupid. This whole thing is a really stupid idea. He should just scold Mingyu, trudge pitifully back to his own apartment, and nap off this hangover while forgetting this whole thing ever happened.
But he's been listless since the breakup. Two years with someone and nothing to show for it. You're smothering me, Seungcheol-ah, is what she'd said when she dumped him. She'd looked at him like she expected him to cry. And then she'd told him: there's a job in Osaka she didn't want to turn down. Two weeks later, she’d gotten on a plane.
The thing is, Seungcheol isn't built for being lonely. It rots him, makes him worse. He knows he's been miserable to be around, he's seen the looks his friends give him. Even if this boyfriend-for-a-day scheme turns out to just be something they all laugh at in their groupchat, it's not like things can get worse.
And there's something about the audacity of the message. He pulls it up and reads it again. He responds to the email and throws his phone on the couch, sinking back into it with a groan.
"I'm going. Mingyu-yah, make me ramyun."
🪼⋆｡𖦹°
A deep sense of embarrassment has Seungcheol's face lighting up like a traffic light when he reaches the cafe. It's crowded — anyone here could be his date for the day. But he knows, as soon as he walks in and sees him.
"Yoon Jeonghan," he mutters to himself, shaking his head as he approaches the table in the middle, where Jeonghan sits in a red cashmere sweater that Seungcheol had chipped in to buy him last year with a group of their friends.
"Ha ha, very funny," he says when he gets closer, pasting a smile on his face and trying to act like this whole stupid bit isn't pushing him to the brink.
Jeonghan looks up from his phone, confused. "Oh? Seungcheollie? What?"
It's said so sincerely that Seungcheol feels tripped up, doubt creeping in, and he backtracks. "Oh…ah. Well, I guess this is a funny coincidence."
Jeonghan tilts his head. "Why?"
There is no end to Seungheol's humiliation. Jeonghan hadn't said anything in the group chat this morning, he realizes, even though he is certainly in it. Seungcheol hadn't noticed.
He sighs and drops into the empty chair across from Jeonghan, pulling off his gloves and sliding his beanie off his hair in a slow, defeated motion.
"It's this stupid thing Mingyu did. I thought you were — never mind." he stops and looks around the cafe.
This must mean his real date is here, somewhere. He scans the crowd. It's mostly university students and people on their way to work. Not a flash of red among them.
"Oh, that," Jeonghan says casually. He picks up the americano in front of him and takes a sip. His face is pleasant, but unreadable.
"'Oh that'?" Seungcheol repeats disbelievingly. The door behind them jingles to announce a newcomer, and Seungcheol turns to look. It's a trio of teenage girls. He droops.
Jeonghan sighs, like he'd hoped that Seungcheol would figure it out on his own. "It is me. I'm your date for the day, Seungcheollie."
Seungcheol's head whips around. "You are?"
Jeonghan balks. "Well, don't act so horrified." He starts to scoot his chair away from the table, as if to leave.
Seungcheol leans towards him with his hands out, lifting himself out of the chair ever so slightly. "No! I didn't mean — just sit down."
Jeonghan's mouth curls into a satisfied smirk and he sits back down.
"So," he says casually, lifting his cup to his mouth and taking another sip. "What do you want to do today, lover?"
Seungcheol groans. He watches Jeonghan watch him. He waits for the cackle, the ah, Seungcheollie…the look on your face, ha! But Jeonghan just looks at him plainly.
"Okay." Seungcheol points a finger in Jeonghan's direction. "But I'm not buying you a vacuum."
🪼⋆｡𖦹°
Seungcheol doesn't bother with small talk when Mingyu answers his call.
"Did you put him up to this?"
Mingyu's groggy voice comes through the phone sluggishly. "Hyung?"
"Jeonghannie," Seungcheol clarifies. "Did you pay him or something?"
He pulls his jacket tighter around himself to ward off the cold. He's leaning against the wall next to the door of the cafe with his phone pressed to his ear while he waits for Jeonghan to use the restroom. Every time the door swings open as customers come and go, Seungcheol is hit with the chilly bite of early morning winter air.
"I don't— wait. Jeonghan is the one who answered your ad??" Mingyu asks, disbelief coloring his voice.
Seungcheol turns to look at the bathroom door just in time to see Jeonghan appear. He's fiddling with the coat draped over his arms, searching the pocket for his phone. He's in his own world. And then, as Seungcheol stands there staring, Jeonghan suddenly looks up and directly at him. He grins at Seungcheol, teeth shining even across the room. It causes a sharp pain in Seungcheol’s chest. Anxiety, he decides, the feeling familiar to him. He needs to hurry this conversation up.
Seungcheol presses his mouth close to his phone and says, "Yeah."
Mingyu clears his throat. "No…hyung, I didn't put him up to it. I mean he must have seen it in our group chat, but…"
"So he's just fucking with me, right?" Seungcheol grumbles.
Mingyu sighs. "Does it seem like he's fucking with you? Is he making fun of you?"
"Not any more than usual. He's actually…he's actually being really…" Seungcheol searches for the word. "Sweet."
There's silence for a moment, then Mingyu speaks. "That's nice. I think he just wanted to be nice to you, hyung."
He waits, and Mingyu clears his throat. "You know, I think Jeonghan just never knew how to get close to you. We've all been friends for so long but…"
"What are you talking about? Jeonghan and I are close!" Seungcheol feels hurt by the implication.
Immediately, he's thinking back on his interactions with Jeonghan over the years, wondering if he's been neglecting him in some way. He can't see how that would be the case, unless Jeonghan has been misinterpreting things. Seungcheol knows he can come on a little strong, approach people too aggressively. But he likes to think he's always respected Jeonghan's space.
And truthfully, Seungcheol has always wanted to be closer to Jeonghan. In a friend group as big as theirs, it's always been normal for them to group up in odd combinations, for their relationships with one another to move and shift over the years. Jeonghan has always clung to Jisoo and Seungkwan, friendly with Seungcheol but keeping a little distance between them that Seungcheol has never really understood.
If he really casts his mind back, maybe there had been times when Seungcheol had been a little overbearing. A little much. He gets that a lot. And maybe there had been times — especially early on when they first met — when Seungcheol had given into the effect Jeonghan has on him. On everyone, surely. Jeonghan is beautiful, that's just a fact. There have been a few times when Seungcheol has found himself flirting. But Jeonghan always laughs it off and retreats, and Seungcheol backs off out of respect for his boundaries, and the odd chasm between them stays as wide as ever.
Which is why Jeonghan is the last person Seungcheol would have possibly expected to answer the ad.
"You should just talk to him," Mingyu says earnestly when Seungcheol doesn't say anything else, and then he hangs up.
Seungcheol blinks down at his phone for a moment and sighs. He feels eyes on him, and when he glances up, Jeonghan is heading his way. As soon as he approaches, Seungcheol speaks up.
"We're close, right?"
He asks it so abruptly, before Jeonghan has a chance to speak, that Jeonghan just stops in his tracks and stares at him. "What?"
Seungcheol shifts his weight from foot to foot and laughs. "Nothing. Just — you're not making fun of me, right? By answering the ad?"
They're crowding the doorway, and two young women give them pointed looks when they squeeze around them to leave the cafe.
Seungcheol knows he's looking at Jeonghan intensely but he needs to know. If he's going to go through with this — and that's a big if — he needs to know if this is one of Jeonghan's weird schemes that he and Jisoo will laugh about over sheet masks and fried chicken one night.
The look Jeonghan gives him is odd; nervous but agitated. Seungcheol can't decipher it.
"No, Cheol. I'm not making fun of you." Jeonghan sighs. "Look, if the 'date' concept freaks you out, forget about it. We're just hanging out for a day. Okay? We do that all the time."
Except they don't do that all the time. It's not often they hang out just the two of them. Seungcheol squints at him, but Jeonghan just blinks back at him innocently. "Okay."
Jeonghan smiles at him and gestures at the front door of the cafe, nudging Seungcheol forward.
"I'm surprised you even showed up," Jeonghan comments lightly, when they step outside.
He bundles up immediately, shivering against the cold and murmuring a thanks when Seungcheol pulls his own scarf from around his neck and hands it over.
"I thought you'd be pissed about the whole thing. Ah but that's what you get for handing over your phone to a drunk Mingyu, I guess."
"It's Mingyu, you know how he is," Seungcheol says, flapping his hand between them. And Jeonghan nods, because he does know how Mingyu is. A hopeless romantic.
"I was mad but…" Seungcheol trails off with a shrug. "He thought he was helping. He just wanted me to get out more."
"He's taking care of you. It's like hiring a dog walker for a day," Jeonghan observes, eyes shifting to look at Seungcheol as they walk, the corner of his lip wobbling mischievously.
"Yah, Yoon Jeonghan," Seungcheol complains. "It's nothing like that. I'm not a dog. I'm a man."
"'Lonely and desperate bisexual man'," Jeonghan quotes, dodging the immediate swipe of Seungcheol's hand.
At Seungcheol's look, Jeonghan cackles loudly, nearly walking into a street sign. When the last lingering chuckles tumble out of him, his face relaxes into something soft and sweet. Seungcheol feels caught on it for a moment, he can't look away. Another one of those moments when he remembers how pretty Jeonghan is. It feels dangerous, suddenly, to have given into whatever this is.
And then a bus comes to a loud halt on the corner next to them, and the spell is broken.
"So where to first?" Jeonghan asks, looking around as if searching for activity ideas among the cramped city blocks that surround them.
Seungcheol lets out a disbelieving laugh and elbows him. "You're supposed to have that figured out, Jeonghan-ah. You're the one taking me out on a date. Or—" he trips over his words and course corrects. "Hangout. Whatever we're calling it."
Jeonghan hums. "I have an idea, but it's outside the city. We'll need to drive." Then he just looks at Seungcheol pointedly until Seungcheol sighs and leads him in the direction of his apartment.
🪼⋆｡𖦹°
A bored employee unhooks the chain to the lot to signal to the people waiting — Jeonghan and Seungcheol — that the amusement park is open.
Seungcheol looks around at the empty racetrack, the barren queue for tickets. He gets a wild thought to ask Jeonghan if he did something crazy like rent out the venue, but then a group of college students trails in behind them.
He can see staff setting up the track, wiping down the brightly colored go karts. When he looks to his left, Jeonghan is looking at him expectantly.
Seungcheol raises his eyebrows. "Here?"
Jeonghan shrugs. "You love cars."
Seungcheol feels oddly touched that Jeonghan remembers the few Formula 1 conversations he's probably witnessed him have with Mingyu.
He brings a hand up to shield his eyes from the sun and squints at the man across from him. "It's eleven in the morning, though."
Jeonghan shrugs and grins at him, jerking his head to the ticket window. When they approach, the staff member recites the rules and the driving fee, and Jeonghan just nods and looks at Seungcheol until Seungcheol pulls out his wallet.
They sit through the mandatory safety video and pick out helmets. Jeonghan gets distracted by his phone so Seungcheol chooses a red helmet and shoves it onto Jeonghan's head. When Jeonghan huffs and flips up the visor to glare at him playfully, Seungcheol laughs.
"Ah, cute."
The first go around the track, they play it safe. Seungcheol pulls across the finish line well before Jeonghan and then hoots smugly at him, pumping his fists in the air obnoxiously.
At Jeonghan's Confident enough to go again, Cheol? followed by his stupid grin, Seungcheol quickly pays for another round and off they go. Jeonghan slows down behind Seungcheol as they go around one of the sharper turns closer to the end of the track, and then, when Seungcheol's car naturally slows just past the curve, Jeonghan accelerates and flies past him. Seungcheol huffs but laughs at the victory cheers he hears Jeonghan crowing as he overtakes Seungcheol and speeds towards the finish line.
"Good job, Jeonghan-ah," Seungcheol concedes, when they're hanging their helmets up in the small locker room after the race.
Jeonghan's bent over his shoulder bag, searching through it chaotically, but he looks up when Seungcheol speaks. His mouth twitches.
"Not gonna be a sore loser, hm?"
Seungcheol pouts. "I'm never a sore loser," Seungcheol lies. He's notorious for it. Jeonghan just laughs.
"Okay, loser buys lunch." He straightens up and turns to grin, brandishing a hair tie and pulling his hair back from his face.
Seungcheol gapes at him. "I'm already buying everything!"
He braces himself when Jeonghan walks towards him, but Jeonghan just reaches out and squeezes his side, right above his hip. He's a little ticklish there, but he doesn't laugh or jump. He holds himself still. He's never spent this much time with Jeonghan alone, and he’s reminded why. He's always felt oddly nervous around him, unsure. Jeonghan's unpredictable sometimes, and even moreso, it seems, around Seungcheol.
But there's that other thing, too. The effect Jeonghan has on him. On everyone, surely.
It's here in the empty go kart track locker room with them, when Jeonghan looks at him and grins. With his hair pulled pack, he looks younger. He looks playful. Seungcheol's eyes are drawn to him, to the little wisps that escape the elastic's grasp, to the dark beauty mark on his cheek. Yeah, Jeonghan makes him feel nervous. But there have been times, over the years, when it's more like being caught in a net. Like being pulled in.
Dangerous.
Jeonghan brushes past him, towards the door. "Come on, Cheollie. I'm starving."
🪼⋆｡𖦹°
Lunch is a picnic, Jeonghan tells him. Jeonghan and Seungkwan are both like that, whimsical. Seungcheol has always found them cute for it.
But where Seungkwan might go to great lengths to find a proper picnic basket and pack it full of delicate little dishes he makes while following carefully outlined instructions from Hansol's mom's favorite cookbook, Jeonghan makes Seungcheol park outside of a convenience store and comes back out with a plastic bag. A few blocks away, they stop at a park and Jeonghan reveals a haul of junk food, premade rice balls, and a carefully covered cup of ramyun he hastily threw together at the counter and paid for with Seungcheol's card.
Seungcheol laughs and shakes his head but sits across from Jeonghan at the picnic table he's chosen and grabs a pair of chopsticks. The second Jeonghan pulls the lid off the ramyun, steam lifts off the spicy broth and curls up into the air between them.
"This is the weirdest date I've ever been on," Seungcheol comments, and then, recognizing his slip-up again, corrects quickly, "Or hangout, whatever."
Jeonghan looks at him for a moment and shrugs. "Call it whatever you want, Seungcheollie." He says it casually, but he won't look at Seungcheol. It prickles at him, and brings him back to what he's been wondering since the beginning.
He sets his chopsticks down. "Be real with me, Jeonghan. Why did you reply to the ad?"
Jeonghan pinches a big bite of noodles between his chopsticks and shovels them into his mouth. He looks…well, he looks nervous. Again, Seungcheol feels itchy. Maybe Mingyu was wrong. Maybe this is some kind of scheme, maybe Jeonghan has enlisted one of the others in it to laugh at him.
But Jeonghan chews and swallows, and then he sighs. "I felt bad. I didn't want you to get upset when no one responded to the ad."
Heat rises in Seungcheol quickly, a sharp sting of embarrassment and wounded pride. He sits up straight. "Yah." He thinks about the guy in his email with the foot fetish and doesn't say anything else. He crosses his arms over his chest, a movement Jeonghan's eyes follow.
"No, no," Jeonghan says, waving his hands at Seungcheol placatingly. "That didn't come out right. I mean who answers personal ads these days, right? That's all. I thought this would be fun." He averts his eyes, looking down as he pokes at a rice ball with the tip of his finger.
"I wanted to hang out," Jeonghan says finally, plainly. His body sags with it, like telling such a simple and earnest truth is a pin prick letting all the air out of a balloon. "I know you don't — I get that I'm not the one you usually choose to hang out with."
Some odd feeling bubbles up in Seungcheol at that. Almost anxiety but not quite. It's the sensation of something significant happening, a problem he feels an urgency to solve.
"Jeonghan-ah," he says quickly, wetting his lip and trying to decide what he wants to say. He feels like there has been a very stupid miscommunication between them until now and he feels excited to correct it. "I thought you didn't like me. Or — or something. I don't know."
He looks at Jeonghan, unsure. Talking to him feels like wading through a fog sometimes, but he feels like he's close to something. Whether or not it's just another wall, he doesn't know. He might as well find out. He's gotten this far.
"I'm glad you replied." He means it, he realizes as he says it. He is glad. He doesn't really know what's happening, but he's glad for it. He's finding that he likes the way Jeonghan keeps him on his toes. Hanging out with him feels like one of those choose-your-own-adventure books he used to read as a kid; he has no idea what's going to happen next, but he's excited to find out.
He holds his breath. Slowly, a smile held captive frees itself and spreads across Jeonghan's face, tiny teeth peeking out. He hums happily and goes back to his noodles.
"Wah," Seungcheol says loudly then, to lighten the mood. And maybe to gloat. "You wanted to hang out with me? You like me?" He's teasing. He's poking at Jeonghan, tugging teasingly at him with the goading sound of his voice. It's like something's come unstuck and he knows now, a little better, where the softer edges of Jeonghan can be found and gently pressed.
Jeonghan's cheeks turn pink and he just shoves a rice ball in Seungcheol's direction. "Eat that."
"Yah, Yoon Jeonghan," Seungcheol crows, picking it up and shoving it into his mouth.
🪼⋆｡𖦹°
Seungcheol looks up at the looming entrance to COEX Mall and frowns.
"Jeonghan-ah," he whines. "I told you I'm not buying you a vacuum."
Jeonghan makes a show of crossing his arms over his chest and giving Seungcheol a cold look. "Backing out on your promises, Cheol-ah? What kind of start to a relationship is that? Ah, really."
"A — what?" Seungcheol sputters. He tugs at Jeonghan's coat. "I told you that I wouldn't!"
"We're going to the aquarium, Seungcheollie. Relax."
Jeonghan walks ahead of him through the entrance to the mall, and Seungcheol has no choice but to follow him across the metropolis of stores and cafes to the other side of the mall where the aquarium greets them with gigantic posters promising encounters with turtles and otters.
At the ticket booth, Seungcheol hands over his card to cover the discounted price for the couples ticket package. He feels his face heat when the woman giggles before handing it back to him.
Once they're inside, Seungcheol half expects Jeonghan to cheekily make him pay the 70,000 KRW price for the special penguin feeding or to contort himself enough to crawl through the children's play area with him or something.
But Jeonghan gets quieter inside the dark labyrinth of the aquarium. He shrugs off his coat and drapes it over his arm, walking along the guided path wallpapered with facts aboout sharks. He points at a dimly lit tank full of eels and smiles at Seungcheol, and Seungcheol realizes that this is just something Jeonghan wanted to do. It's something he wanted Seungcheol to do with him. All of the mischievous pretense that’s colored the day seeps away and he’s left with: the soft look Jeonghan gives him when they pass by an octopus tank.
He starts to wonder, as he lets Jeonghan pull him by the hand over the bridge that leads to the otter pool and watches him take his phone out to zoom in on a pair of otters who are fighting over a toy, if this whole thing really is a scheme. Not a prank or a joke at Seungcheol's expense, but a scheme on Jeonghan's part with the simple objective of spending time with Seungcheol.
He starts to wonder if they've both been really stupid. That maybe they've spent years orbiting each other in the same friend group, both wanting to get closer to the other but stopped by some invisible, made-up barrier.
"Here, Hannie," Seungcheol says softly when they get to the touch pool.
All along the bottom, there are starfish clinging to the smooth surface. Above them, three or four rays swim happy laps around the large pool. Seungcheol spots a few small sharks weaving in between them, and a couple sea snails sluggishly wiggle along the sides. There's a small group of children cooing at the creatures from the other side of the exhibit, but other than that, the area is surprisingly empty.
Jeonghan looks at him, then his eyes drop to the pool. They take a seat together on the short wall, and Seungcheol takes Jeonghan's hand. He leads it to the water.
"I used to love these as a kid," he says. He positions Jeonghan's hand with his fingers, until it's resting just on the surface of the water with the flat of his palm down. "Wait for it."
They sit there, leaning over the touch pool together with Seungcheol hand holding Jeonghan's over the water. Seungcheol watches the water with a sharp eye, tracing the movements of the rays.
Then, one of the larger ones approaches them. It raises itself closer to the surface of the water, and as it swims by, it brushes its smooth body along the underside of Jeonghan's hand.
"Aigoo," he coos, following it for a few seconds as it passes by. He leaves his hand in the water for a few seconds, wiggling his fingertips just under the surface.
Seungcheol is gripped with the urge to grab Jeonghan's hand again. He doesn't even care that there are no rays swimming their way this time; he doesn't need to pretense. He just wants to hold Jeonghan's hand again.
"Before we leave, I want to see the jellyfish. Soonyoungie loves them…I told him I'd take a video," Jeonghan says to Seungcheol when he stands up, wiping the aquarium water on his jeans and smiling.
"Okay, yeah," Seungcheol replies dumbly.
Jeonghan grins again and starts walking away from the touch tanks towards the next exhibit. Seungcheol follows, his thoughts elsewhere. Thinking about how badly he still wants to hold Jeonghan's hand. Wondering when this started to feel like a real date.
It’s dangerous. It feels so dangerous.
His phone buzzes.
Gyu »
hyung hows it going
Seungcheol's fingers hover over the screen. He starts typing I don't think this date is a joke at all. He deletes it. Then he types it again. He's about to hit send when an email comes through. It's the same screened format that Jeonghan's had come through, in reply to his personal ad. The subject reads 34/m/seoul:
Whoa. I never seek out personal ads — who does anymore? — but I came across yours. It was very cute and charming ㅋㅋㅋ I'd love to take you out. You don't have to buy me anything…unless you want to, of course ;) If you're interested, message me at ———.
Something flutters low in Seungcheol's stomach. He hadn't seen any other emails come through in response to his ad since yesterday. This one is nice. It's normal. There's no request for photos of Seungcheol's feet. It's almost certainly not Jeonghan. This is an honest-to-god response to his personal ad from someone who sincerely wants to go out on a date with him. At least for a day. It has a phone number at the end.
It could still be a creep, of course. But it doesn't sound like it. It sounds like exactly what Seungcheol had wanted when he'd been drunkenly whining to Mingyu that night: a date with someone nice and interested in him.
"Seungcheollie?" Jeonghan's voice calls out.
Seungcheol's head shoots up and his eyes find Jeonghan's immediately. He's standing just inside the dimly lit corridor that leads to the jellyfish gallery, absentmindedly flipping through the aquarium map he'd picked up at the entrance. When he sees he has Seungcheol's attention, he quirks his eyebrows up and tips his head towards the exhibit in question.
When Seungcheol doesn’t move, Jeonghan’s brow furrows and he comes over to see what has caught his attention. In the split second before he steps closer, Seungcheol panics and drops his phone on the hard tile floor. He curses under his breath. He doesn’t know what’s the matter with him. He doesn’t have to hide things from Jeonghan, they’re friends. And getting an email isn’t illegal.
Jeonghan swoops down, beating Seungcheol to his phone.
“Did Channie send you the photo of Seungkwannie that he sent me? Seungkwan’s gonna–”
“No!” Seungcheol says too loudly, too quickly, and snatches his phone back.
“Oh,” Jeonghan says, eyes flitting down to the bright screen of Seungcheol’s phone and then back up again, unsure.
Seungcheol blanches. He’s acting weird. He knows the look on his face must be intense because of the way Jeonghan is responding to him. Any other time, Jeonghan would be sidling up to him, giggling and teasing him, stealing his phone away and announcing whatever has him embarrassed to whoever’s around. That all he does is stand there awkwardly means that Seungcheol either needs to shut the whole thing down or come clean.
He sighs. Then he straightens his shoulders and takes ten seconds to internally berate himself for being such a fucking lunatic. It’s just an email. This is a fake date. Probably.
"It’s, ah…" Seungcheol wets his lips. "I got another email just now." At Jeonghan's blank expression, he adds, "A response to the personal ad Mingyu posted. This guy, he — he wants to go out."
He unlocks his phone again and shows Jeonghan the email. He watches Jeonghan’s face as his eyes scan the text, the way his expression neutralizes the more he reads. Finally, he hands the phone back over silently.
The corner of his mouth twitches, but he just sniffs and looks away.
"That's good, Seungcheol. That's what you wanted. I'm sure this guy is actually serious."
Immediately, Seungcheol grimaces. Jeonghan sighs and turns back to him. "That's…that's not what I meant."
“I know what you meant,” Seungcheol lies. He doesn’t have any idea what’s happening. Nothing has made sense since he found Jeonghan waiting for him at the cafe in his red sweater at ten o’clock this morning.
But he says it anyway, softly in the hopes of smoothing out the look on Jeonghan’s face.
Jeonghan chews on his lip, giving Seungcheol a look that’s completely unreadable. Then he shrugs and turns once again to the jellyfish exhibit. He takes two long strides towards it and then stops, turning to give Seungcheol a look that clearly asks, Are you coming or not?
Seungcheol looks back down at the email. His thumb hovers over the trash icon but stops. He dims his phone and slips it into his pocket.
"I'm coming," he calls out a minute after Jeonghan gives up on him and disappears down the dark hallway.
It's crowded inside the jellyfish gallery when Seungcheol first steps into the rotunda. Kids jump and grab onto the adults guiding them through the exhibit, pointing excited figners at the jellyfish behind the glass. They appear to be part of a school group. It's chaotic, and Seungcheol loses sight of Jeonghan among the huddle of ten year olds. On the other side of the room, near the exit, one of the adults calls out to the children softly, and they start filing out.
When they're gone, Seungcheol is left standing in the middle of the room, looking at Jeonghan where he stands inches from the floor-to-ceiling glass that separates them from the dancing jellies. The crowds inside the aquarium naturally move in waves, and Seungcheol can hear voices behind them already that tell him that soon the jellyfish gallery will be crowded again.
He sidles up next to Jeonghan. The gallery is dark — much darker than the other exhibits — to showcase the backlit jellyfish that glide and flutter inside the 360 tank that surrounds them. Most of the jellies are pink or white, but the backlighting gives them an almost neon yellow hue. It's mesmerizing.
Along the curved walls of the gallery, there are small posts that display plaques with information about jellyfish engraved on them.
A particularly large jellyfish flutters close to the glass, its bell expanding right in front of Jeonghan's face before it propels forward and disappears into the tangle of jellies on the other side of the tank.
"Jellyfish don't have hearts or brains," Jeonghan reads out from the plaque closest to them.
"Lucky them," Seungcheol murmurs, and Jeonghan side-eyes him and then laughs.
The tension breaks like that, inside the jellyfish gallery. Seungcheol is glad for it. He gives Jeonghan a hesitant smile that isn’t returned, but Seungcheol doesn’t mind. All he can think about is the email, why he didn’t just delete it immediately. He’s not going to reply to that guy. He wants to hold Jeonghan’s hand again. It’s dangerous, how real this date is beginning to feel.
They stand side by side watching the jellyfish dance. Or, really, Jeonghan watches the jellyfish. Seungcheol keeps finding himself watching Jeonghan. His profile glows neon yellow in front of the lighting and his face gets so close to the tank that Seungcheol swears the tip of it presses against the glass. He laughs a little, catching Jeonghan's attention.
"Did you take a video for Soonyoungie?" Seungcheol asks knowingly.
"Ah, no I forgot," Jeonghan says, uncharacteristically sheepish when he pulls his phone out and snaps some photos.
Seungcheol watches him giggle to himself as he fires off videos of the jellyfish to Soonyoung, and he wonders if maybe this could be something more. They'd never been very close, but Seungcheol has wanted to be. Maybe, if he goes for it — really goes for it — Jeonghan could see Seungcheol like that. Like someone to take out on picnics and aquarium dates for real.
The anxious stream of his thoughts gets cut off when suddenly the gallery is full of people again. This time it's a group of university-age students and a few couples giggling to each other in matching outfits. Seungcheol gravitates closer to Jeonghan, who is back to following the trails of the jellyfish with his eyes and cooing at them.
"Ready to go?" Seungcheol murmurs.
Jeonghan turns to him, and Seungcheol realizes he's misjudged the distance quite a bit. They're close enough that Jeonghan turning his body slightly means that their arms brush. And when Jeonghan's breath hitches, his eyes wide in surprise to see Seungcheol so close, Seungcheol hears it. He can feel it.
"Seungcheollie," Jeonghan murmurs, and his eyes cut down quickly to Seungcheol's mouth.
It's quick. They cut away again just as fast, and his gaze turns shifty immediately.
It's a split second. It's a small moment that casts the entire day in a new light, and Seungcheol finds himself fighting a grin.
Jeonghan had responded to his email. Jeonghan had responded to his email. Who does that? A new certainty blooms, cautiously at first and then a rapid burst of color, in Seungcheol's chest.
That little nugget of curiosity from earlier, wondering if Jeonghan wanted to spend time with him — it reshapes itself and makes way for another, more exciting possibility. That maybe, for Jeonghan, this isn't just a pretend date or a way to make Seungcheol feel better about a silly personal ad.
Maybe Jeonghan asked Seungcheol out because he wanted to.
Jeonghan all but flees from the room, and Seungcheol trails behind him, thinking. He pulls his phone out of his pocket and deletes the email. What’s the point of holding onto it as an option? It’s not an option. He wants to ask Jeonghan out. He’s going to do it, after this. He’s just going to do it. He thinks Jeonghan will say yes. He hopes. He’s pretty sure he will.
The jellyfish exhibit is one of the last ones in the aquarium, and when they exit on the other side of the gallery, they make their way to the mall exit. Seungcheol feels giddy. He feels clever, like he's solved a particularly challenging puzzle. Jeonghan likes him.
"Still refusing to hold up your end of the deal?"
Jeonghan's lilting voice interrupts his thoughts. Seungcheol looks at him in confusion until he looks up at the store sign over their heads. Jeonghan gestures to the row of shiny stick vacuums in the display window and waggles his eyebrows.
Seungcheol smiles. He feels like could lift a car.
"I'll buy you a vacuum, Jeonghannie. Just tell me which one you want," he says happily, taking a step towards the store, ready to shell out whatever amount he needs to.
Jeonghan stops him with a strange look on his face. Seungcheol just reaches out and grips his hand, giving it a squeeze. "Come on."
"Ah, that's —" Jeonghan stops him again, pulling his hand away. He looks at Seungcheol for a moment, brow furrowed. Then, his face clears and he laughs, waving his hand dismissively. "Ah, Cheol. You don't have to buy me a vacuum. I'm just joking. Come on."
He makes for the exit and Seungcheol follows, more confused than ever.
🪼⋆｡𖦹°
When he puts the car in park in front of Jeonghan's apartment building, he's reeling from the sudden shift in mood between them. The wall is back up and Seungcheol is back to feeling confused by its scale. He's reminded of why he and Jeonghan had never gotten very close despite knowing each other all these years.
He's always felt like Jeonghan keeps himself just a little bit unknowable. There's always some invisible trench dug between them that Seungheol has never figured out how to cross. It's here now, again, in the distance between them in the front seat of Seungcheol's car.
"Well…" Jeonghan starts, gathering his coat and bag. He turns to Seungcheol and his smile is more like a thin line. "I hope you had fun, Seungcheollie."
"Ah." Seungcheol nods, and he twists his hands awkwardly around the leather of his steering wheel. "Yeah."
"Good."
Annoyance seeps in. He’s frustrated by how confused he feels, by how confusing Jeonghan can be.
Seungcheol can feel his ears getting hot, and he clenches his jaw. He puts the car in drive pointedly. "I'll see you."
He doesn't know what Jeonghan is doing in the passenger seat, what kind of expression he's making. He doesn't look. He hears him sigh again, and then the sound of him opening the car door. Then he’s nearly gone, shutting the door and hiking his bag up onto his shoulder.
At the last second, Seungcheol grips the steering wheel and makes a decision. He lowers the passenger side window.
“Jeonghan-ah?”
“Hm?”
Seungcheol leans over, straining to see Jeonghan’s face from the driver’s seat. It’s carefully neutral, again.
“Thank you,” he says pointedly. He adds, “it was a nice date.” He leaves a little emphasis on the word, to let Jeonghan know it’s intentional.
Jeonghan looks at him for a long moment. His mouth quirks up unsteadily, like a smile he’s not fully sure he’s allowing to happen, and then quickly settles again. Finally he nods, and then he walks away.
🪼⋆｡𖦹°
The day after their date, Seungcheol texts him. Then the next day. And the next. He texts him a few times.
"You've texted him seven times, hyung." Mingyu clucks his tongue, looking down at Seungcheol's text messages. "You've texted him every day!"
"That's not a lot!" Seungcheol protests, leaning across the table to grab fruitlessly at the phone. "I text all of you all day long!"
"Well yeah, but," Mingyu waves the phone at him, the screen still open to his texts with Jeonghan. His very once-sided texts with Jeonghan. "We reply."
Hansol lets out a long breath. "Oof, low blow."
"It's just how hyung is," Mingyu goes on, handing over the phone and returning to the beer he's been nursing since they got to the bar. "Typical avoidance shit. You know."
Seungcheol does know. He knows. He's been there, at brunches or over late night beers, when their friends nudge and poke Jeonghan about some date he's just been on or some guy he'd gone home with. He has joined in on the chorus of groans and eye rolls when Jeonghan would just shrug, clearly avoiding any idea of commitment.
But Seungcheol hasn’t asked him for anything. He still hasn’t even decided if the date was a real date. It’s just that if it was, then Seungcheol wants to. Ask him for something, that is. Some kind of commitment.
He’s spent a little too much time thinking about all this. Four days of unanswered texts.
He keeps thinking about the look on Jeonghan's face when Seungcheol had brought up the email, the one that’s long since deleted.
"What're we talking about?" Jeonghan drawls, making Seungcheol jump. His response is way over the top. He can tell by the way Seungkwan stares at him as he and Jeonghan slide into stools across the table from them.
Maybe Seungcheol had trailed Hansol and Mingyu to the bar because he'd known Hansol would be waiting for Seungkwan to get off work, and maybe he'd known there would be a chance Jeonghan would be with him.
"Nothing!" he says quickly, laughing inexplicably. He presses the rim of his beer bottle against his mouth.
Hansol jumps in then, to ask Seungkwan about his day. That draws Jeonghan in as well, pulling his strangely intense gaze away from Seungcheol.
Seungcheol's chest shudders, and he takes a deep breath that just narrowly avoids turning into a coughing fit. He catches Hansol's eye and tries to convey his thanks. Later, he'll have to remember to tell Hansol that he's Seungcheol's new favorite. Mingyu, however, who is texting furiously under the table and completely oblivious to the mess he has created, is still in the dog house, as far as Seungcheol's friends are concerned.
He stays on the outskirts of the conversation, which is unlike him. If Jeonghan notices, it's unclear. He doesn't look Seungcheol’s way again. It feels like old times, in a bad way. Jeonghan gives him a tight-lipped smile whenever their eyes meet by coincidence, as if they’re acquaintances. As if they’re just two people who have a lot of friends in common. It sucks.
Seungkwan definitely notices, and he hangs back when the night comes to an end and everyone starts gathering their coats and planning subway routes.
"Hyung," Seungkwan says softly so that only Seungcheol can hear. He nudges him and nods, pulling them further out of earshot.
"What is it?" Seungcheol asks warily, looking over Seungkwan's shoulder to watch Jeonghan wrap his scarf around his neck.
"Hyung," Seungkwan says more urgently. "Jeonghan's jealous."
Seungcheol's fingers slip where he's clumsily trying to button up his coat. "What?"
"About you going on a date with someone else," Seungkwan says, just as abruptly.
Seungcheol opens his mouth but Seungkwan shakes his head impatiently.
"I told hyung he was being stupid. The whole email thing. The fake date thing — I mean, what is this, a drama? Who does that?" Seungkwan rolls his eyes. Then he sighs. "But he's spent the last week wallowing over how you didn't get the hint and now you're dating someone new. I can't stand listening to it anymore, hyung. I told him to confess to you ages ago!"
Seungcheol stares at him, trying to decide what to address first.
"Are you supposed to be telling me this? Or — or shouldn't you be…I don't know…telling me more subtly at least?"
"Aish. I just said that this is not a drama. Ah, really. Ugh. You two are made for each other."
Seungkwan swats Seungcheol's forearm, with enough force and frustration that it does actually hurt a little, and then he spares a split second to look at Seungcheol worriedly, like he's going to scold Seungkwan right now. As if he doesn't have bigger things to worry about, because: what?
"What?"
"You know, hyung, if you guys just actually said things out loud — honest things! — then your lives would be a whole lot simpler."
Seungcheol rolls his eyes and huffs. "I'm not taking romantic advice from someone who is practically engaged to his childhood crush."
Seungkwan rolls his eyes again. But before he can say something disgustingly sappy about Hansol, Seungcheol cuts him off. Out of the corner of his eye, he sees Jeonghan look their way. He figures he has less than a minute before he grabs Seungkwan and drags him away. And Seungcheol won't miss his chance. If this is the chance he thinks it is.
"Seungkwan. I'm not dating anyone. I didn't go on a date. Did he tell you that? That's — he's so dramatic. Wow." His mind is reeling, picturing Jeonghan stomping home from their date and immediately complaining to Seungkwan about Seungcheol dating someone new. After getting an email.
Oh my god. Jeonghan likes me, Seungcheol realizes. More than that, Seungkwan had said ages. Jeonghan has liked him for a while now.
"It was a scheme," he murmurs happily, grinning now.
Seungkwan squints at him. "No — no, that's the opposite of what I'm saying."
Seungcheol reaches out and grabs Seungkwan's shoulders, giving him a shake. "It was a scheme. Just not to make fun of me. It was a…love scheme."
That’s why Jeonghan had been so strange in the car. It’s why he’d even shown up in the first place. He’s liked Seungcheol the entire time. Seungcheol processes it all one fact at a time. He lines them all up and goes down the line: Jeonghan likes him. Jeonghan is jealous. Jeonghan is punishing him for reading an email.
It’s dangerous. It’s stupid. It’s wonderful.
Seungkwan's mouth opens and closes a few times, and then he sighs. "You're so…" he shrugs Seungcheol's hands off his shoulders and gives him a look that's half pleading, half stern. "Just go talk to him, please? So this doesn't have to go on. I live with him, hyung, really." With one last pointed look, he turns and goes to seek out Hansol in the huddle of people.
Seungcheol's eyes go straight to Jeonghan. He's easy to spot, because he's already looking at Seungcheol.
"All of this over an email, really?" is what he opens with, after running through a hundred possible things he wants to say the second he gets close enough to Jeonghan to talk over the rabble of voices in the bar.
Jeonghan's eyes flutter closed and his shoulders slump. "Seungkwannie," he mutters, too quietly for Seungcheol to hear. But he recognizes the word in the shape of Jeonghan's lips.
He leans closer, to make sure he's heard clearly. "Jeonghan-ah," he says. "I didn't know it was a real date."
Jeonghan pulls away and gives him a hard look. There's so much going on in his expression that Seungcheol recognizes. He's realizing that he's paid much more attention to Jeonghan over the years than he's realized. He knows him well. When Jeonghan hesitates, he knows it's because, right now, he’s hesitating between staying here to endure this conversation and leaving immediately. And when Jeonghan speaks, Seungcheol sees through the frustrated tone and hears it for what it is: Jeonghan is afraid.
Outside, their friends filter out through the door behind them, only to barely glance their way as they split into pairs and yell final goodbyes as they set off in different directions. The door to the bar closes, taking the noise with it. And then it's just Seungcheol and Jeonghan, standing on the freezing cold street corner.
"It wasn't a real date," he says finally. "That was the whole thing, remember?"
"I know it wasn't supposed to be a real date but — come on, Jeonghan. I didn't need Seungkwan to tell me that you've been acting weird ever since I told you about the email."
"Cheol, it's been a week. It's not like we're the kind of friends who talk every day."
Seungcheol looks past the pang in his chest at that, because he knows what Jeonghan is trying to do. "I've wanted to be. I've…" he softens his voice and steps forward slowly, trying to make himself seem as nonthreatening and dateable as possible.
"I've wanted to be closer to you for years, Jeonghannie." It comes out too earnest, and Seungcheol tries his best to absorb his own cringe.
Jeonghan just shrugs and looks away. "It doesn't matter." He's a brick wall again, impenetrable and infuriating. For the first time, Seungcheol wonders how many times he'd given up on this over the years, worrying he was being too much, when really what Jeonghan needed was for him to just push a little harder. It feels risky, but it's a risk Seungcheol wants to take.
He grabs onto Jeonghan wrist and tugs, pulls him over to one of the benches just down the alley, outside the convenience store next to the bar. Surprisingly, Jeonghan goes. He lets Seungcheol push him down until he's sitting. The neon lights of the store sign cast him in blue and yellow, and all at once Seungcheol is reminded of the jellyfish gallery. The bright look in Jeonghan's eyes as he'd turned to Seungcheol, pointing his crooked fingers at the dozens of dancing jellyfish.
Wow, Seungcheol thinks. Wow.
"Cheol-ah, it's fine. Really. I'm just being — it's just an email. Who cares, right?"
"It's not about that. Jeonghannie, I haven't even thought about that email since I got it. I deleted it. I'm not talking about that. Or what happened last week.” He feels like he’s looking at Jeonghan so intensely that his eyes are going to start watering. “I'm talking about the last seven years."
At Seungcheol’s pointed words, Jeonghan shifts a little on the bench, and it seems to Seungcheol like he's trying to look more surprised at this line of conversation than he actually is. "What about them?"
Seungcheol almost gives up, if he's being honest. It's hard to divert from years of toeing an invisible line he's never fully understood. But maybe that's the problem. He's always turned and retreated from the wall instead of looking for a door.
"Jeonghan-ah," he says, pleading. "Did you go on a fake date with me because you've been secretly hoping I would ask you out? For years?"
"That makes me sound twelve years old."
Seungcheol just looks at him, eyebrows doing a very pointed movement that makes Jeonghan bark out a laugh despite the increasingly nauseated look on his face.
"Wow. You really have been talking to Seungkwan, huh." He scoffs and looks away.
“Jeonghan-ah,” Seungcheol says again, and this time he takes all of the impatience and the frustration and the want and injects it into the word. He puts it all out on the line. It feels like years of possibilities are making themselves known. If this is going to happen — if it could have been happening all these years — he’s not going to waste any more time.
Jeonghan hears it. He hears it all. Seungcheol can tell by the way he stiffens and looks at Seungcheol, right before his body sags with what looks like relief.
“I’ve always wanted to be close to you too. It—“ scared me, is what Jeonghan so clearly doesn’t say. Seungcheol knows Jeonghan so well, he’s paid so much more attention to him than he ever realized.
Around the corner, the door to the bar swings open again and a loud group stumbles out, trying to get their laughter under control. As they walk away and the noise fades, Seungcheol becomes too aware of the cold metal bench under them and the chill of the evening all around them. Jeonghan, who has always run colder anyway, shivers next to him. Seungcheol wants to skip all of this and just coax Jeonghan back to his place where it’s warm. He wants to press the cold tip of his nose to Jeonghan’s neck and make him yelp. Payback for making this all so complicated.
“Hey,” he says, nudging Jeonghan for his attention. He gets it immediately, which is quite a rush. It warms him instantly, and he can feel the flush of his cheeks betraying how easily it all works on him. He’s reminded of what it was like to have Jeonghan all to himself for a day, and he wants to have it again. And again, and again.
Jeonghan drags his eyes over Seungcheol’s face and then his entire torso moves along with the big breath he takes before saying, “I’ve felt – I’ve wanted you to take me on a date for years, Seungcheollie.”
It’s such a Jeonghan way of confessing something, and it does what it’s intended to do. Seungcheol lets out a surprised laugh, leaning into the fizzy happy feeling that’s filling his chest.
“Yah. All you ever had to do was ask, Jeonghan-ah. I’m not a mind reader.” He grins at Jeonghan and scoots closer until he can feel the press of Jeonghan’s thigh.
Jeonghan gets quiet and serious. “I know. I know that. I should have said something, I–”
Seungcheol reaches out and tugs on the bunched up fabric of Jeonghan’s coat, like a warning. Then, he leans in to capture Jeonghan’s mouth. It’s cold enough outside that their breath mingles between them in the seconds before their lips touch and then it’s just warm and soft, Whatever Jeonghan was going to say is forgotten in the friction.
The kiss is chaste at first, cognizant of where they are, even if it’s late and the bench is tucked away. And then that doesn’t seem to matter to either of them anymore the minute Jeonghan opens his mouth to him. It feels like a decision. Seungcheol makes a pleased sound and presses closer, bringing a gloved hand up to cup Jeonghan’s cheek. He frowns into the kiss and pulls away.
Ignoring the annoyed tilt of Jeonghan’s shining mouth, Seungcheol huffs. “Stupid gloves,” he says as he tugs at the leather until the glove comes off and he can shove it into the pocket of his jacket. He wants to touch Jeonghan. He wants to do a lot more, but his hand on Jeonghan’s cheek will do for now.
He goes back in for a kiss, but Jeonghan stops him with a small sound.
“What? You can’t change your mind now, Jeonghan, come on,” Seungcheol says, mostly playfully.
Jeonghan shakes his head. “No, no. I’m just – Cheol, I’m really fucking cold. Can we go back to your place?”
Seungcheol’s hand drops from Jeonghan’s cheek, and he’s immediately fumbling in his coat pockets for his phone to book a car. He blames his clumsiness on how quickly the cold is making his now bare hand freeze.
Jeonghan laughs, an uncharacteristically deep rumbling sound that makes Seungcheol’s head spin.
“Don’t laugh at me,” he complains, swiping through the app and trying not to be too distracted by how red Jeonghan’s mouth is after their kiss.
“Mm,” is all Jeonghan says, pressing close until the cold tip of his nose is dragging along the hinge of Seungcheol’s jaw.
“Fuck, oh my god. What am I doing? Let’s just get the train. It’s right there.”
Jeonghan’s delighted laugh fills the space behind him when Seungcheol pushes himself to his feet. It’s the tinkling gremlin laugh he’s used to, that he’s always loved. He’s always paid so much more attention to Jeonghan than he’s realized. He can’t wait to learn more.
“Come on, Jeonghan-ah,” he says urgently, tugging Jeonghan along.
🪼⋆｡𖦹°
A month later —
“Are you guys gonna be drinking?” Jihoon asks, when he comes out of his home studio to eye the assembly of people in his living room and the bottles of beer on the table. He looks pointedly between Mingyu and Seungcheol. “Hide your phone in a drawer or something this time, hyung.”
“Hey!” Mingyu pouts, shooting up immediately to drape his long limbs around Jihoon’s smaller frame. “It worked didn’t it?”
Jihoon rolls his eyes and exchanges a look with Seunkwan as if to say what are we going to do about any of this?
Jeonghan just laughs and leans over until he’s nearly tipped into Seungcheol’s laugh, cheeks flushed from the beers they’d had earlier. He smells good like he always does, like sweet oranges and the cigarette they’d shared outside the restaurant hours ago. Seungcheol turns and smacks a kiss against the side of his face.
Jihoon just sighs and turns to go. “Okay, okay, I’m going back to work. Don’t burn the place down.” He gives Mingyu a squeeze and then disappears back into his room.
“Anyway,” Seungkwan says, turning back to Jeonghan. “Why do I need to be home tomorrow?” he asks, rerouting them back to the conversation they’d been having before Jihoon came out to scold them.
Jeonghan lets out a smug little hum, looking to Seungcheol immediately. Seungcheol knows he’s being had but he doesn’t even care. This has been his life pretty much every day since he and Jeonghan started dating.
“I have a very expensive vacuum being delivered tomorrow, Seungkwan-ah,” Jeonghan says importantly. “Don’t want to miss it.”
Seungcheol makes a big show of grumbling and groaning like Jeonghan wants, but the dopey grin he knows is taking over his face gives him away. Seungkwan just looks between them and shrugs.
“Whatever, hyung.” He turns to Mingyu to say something that Seungcheol can’t hear, and they start bickering.
“It has one of those bristle things. For pet hair,” Jeonghan says to Seungcheol. As if Seungcheol isn’t the one who paid for the vacuum. He wraps a hand around Jeonghan’s thigh and nods.
“That’s great. You don’t have pets, though,” he says absently, too busy staring at the difference in the size of his hands and the small curve of Jeonghan’s thigh. He’s wearing Seungcheol’s sweat pants, but the sea of fabric doesn’t hide the shape of him.
“No, but you’ve always wanted a dog.”
Seungcheol hums and nods, because that makes sense. He lets his thumb stroke softly across Jeonghan’s knee. “Mm yeah.” Then, he stops. “What?”
Jeonghan shrugs. “That vacuum is an investment. I’ll probably have it for years. It goes where I go,” he says sagely, nodding at Seungcheol. “So you know…if, down the road, you wanted to get a dog…”
Seungcheol stares at him until he breaks, laughing softly and looking away.
“Can’t believe you let him scam you into buying him a vacuum, hyung,” Mingyu says, returning to the conversation once he and Seungkwan settle whatever they’d been arguing over.
Seungcheol just shrugs, smiling and reaching out with his free hand to grab a beer. “Most of Jeonghan’s schemes work out for me in the end.”