Chapter Text
The incident happened as Liam was walking home with two of his mates. They were talking and laughing with each other as usual, Tom was in the middle of a really interesting and funny story that Liam doesn't remember anymore, when a bunch of other boys from another school approached them hooting and hollering about some girl, hurling insults and accusations about one of them getting her pregnant.
“Who cares about her?” One of Liam’s mates had said.
“She's my sister, you dickhead.” The guy, who seemed to be the leader, said back.
Punches were thrown and truly Liam hadn’t wanted to involve himself but one of the guys grabbed him by the collar and gave him a shiner on the eye and after that he really couldn't let it go, he had to defend his own honour innit? In any case, that would've been the worst thing he had taken that afternoon if it hadn't been for the hammer one of them boys grabbed from fucking nowhere.
The blow didn’t hurt for the first 3 seconds if Liam could guess the estimate, then it felt like a white hot searing pain and an immediate headache; he fell down, which he only knew he did because in between blinks he wasn’t standing anymore and instead he was in the ground looking up at the sky dizzily, the clouds dancing in between each other and blurry, he listened to someone telling another to go and try to find an ambulance but after he really doesn't remember much, not even if he could speak again and people were to ask him, he'd just say that he woke up on the white hospital sheets, the headache still there, not searing but pounding enough that opening his eyes seemed to be much of a drag.
There were murmurs around him. “And what's to happen to him?” Said his mother’s voice just a few steps away from him.
“It's hard to say how much the blow could affect his basic functions, we’ll just have to wait and see—”
“Yeah you said that a million fucking times already mate." A frustrated sigh comes from Noel, he knows it is him, he could recognize that voice anywhere, even wounded as he is.
Mam chastises him and there's more words that come from the doctor’s mouth that Liam doesn't hear, too much mumbling for him to listen to clearly, too much ringing inside his head, too much noise. After a few minutes, there’s some silence in the room, Liam opens his eyes and blinks at the harsh lights in the hospital, there's some chairs in the corner of the room where Noel, Mam and Paul are huddled together.
“It’s no use, he’s a retard now.” Paul voices the thought everyone must be having in their own heads, but the other two people in the room raised their voices to say no, Noel accused him of being negative and their mam just didn’t want to hear it. Even Liam’s brain protests, he could get better.
“I won't be able to watch him.” Paul says, playing with his claddagh ring on his finger. “That’s all I’m saying.”
“What? He's your brother,” Noel points at Liam's direction on the bed, but no one glances at him, so Liam can still watch them in peace without being found out.
“I have a job to keep!” Paul exclaims and their mom shushes him saying Liam will wake up, but no one cares to look at him still. Paul huffs and Nol decides to speak up.
“Mam can't stop working, the meds are too expensive even with the insurance—“ Noel tried to reason and in the commotion they start exchanging words faster than Liam’s tired brain can process, the words just fly in the air and he can’t catch them enough if he wants to see their faces, process what they’re feeling.
“Then you help her! l'm not his only brother aren't I?”
“I have a job too, I don't live there anymore.”
“Me neither.”
“Don't fight children,” Mam finally spoke up, sighing. "I can make it work, I'll cut my hours, and I'll ask your aunties for help.”
“No, you don’t need to bother them at all.” Noel says after a minute of letting that sentence hang in the air, it’s just a dickhead move of them both to make their mam solely care for him, which is probably why he shakes his head and sighs too, accepting his fate. “I’ll help you then mam, he’s my brother too, Paul is right.”
“Damn right I am.” Paul murmurs and rubs his face with his open balms, pressing them into his eyes. “We've been here all night.”
“Get out then if you don't care for Liam.”
“I care, you fucking dickhead!”
“Certainly don't look like it!”
“Boys!” Mam raises her voice, sounding really tired. “Not now, Liam needs to sleep.”
“You need to sleep too, mam.” Noel takes one of her hands and speaks in that authoritative voice that makes it hard to say no to him. “Paul will take you home and I'll stay with Liam.”
Both his man and Paul stand up from their seats and gather their things to start their way home. In no time he's alone with Noel who does notice now he's awake. As soon as he does he walks over to him and takes a seat by his side, pressing his thumb gently on the edge of the bandages on Liam's head.
“They got you good kidda." Noel says, his smile is almost teasing, but he's obviously worried for him. Liam blinks and tries to say something but his tongue doesn't wanna cooperate with him so he can only grunt. “The nurses had to shave your head, I know you liked your hair long.”
He blinks more, that's sad, he thinks.
“Did you listen to everything we said?” Noel asked and Liam answered with another grunt, it seemed to be the only thing he could respond with and he didn't know it then but that would stay true for a long time afterwards. “Don't worry about mam or Bod, anything really okay?”
Noel signed, rubbing Liam's hand, the one not connected to anything. “I'll take care of you.”
Honesty laced his brother’s voice and in his newfound limited thinking capacity even Liam can feel the full force of it.
The doctor cleared him to go home two days later since his vitals signs were stable, he didn’t die or went into a vegetative stay, he even said it’s a good sign he can blink, and told him to blink once for yes and twice for no, and when Liam answered his questions well he gave a warm smile to the still frowning faces of Noel and mam.
It was still infuriating to Liam that he still hadn't found his voice yet, his tongue still refused to go where it had to, refused to make more sounds that grunts or whines or hisses. He hissed a lot those first few days, when the nurses changed his bandages and cleaned his stitches on his head, when they moved him around to change his hospital gown, when they sponge bathed him and the water was cold. That was all on the first day, on the second, Noel was present for everything. He supervised the bandage change so he could do it at home, and sponge bathed him gently, squeezing the sponge over Liam’s skin.
“This reminds me of when you were a wee lad.” Noel said, huffing, obviously meaning for it to sound teasing. Liam blinked at him to tell him to go on.
“Mam had seen better days, she needed to sleep.” Noel passed the sponge up to his neck and it tickled him. “Maybe that’s why she thought it was appropriate for a five year old to bathe his newborn brother.”
Liam blinked thrice, he still hadn’t decided what it meant, but Noel could decide for himself.
Liam had been doing a lot of listening when usually he did a lot of talking. He still hadn't decided if not talking wasn’t as bad.
The day he came home, the hospital lent them a wheel chair, his muscles could do nothing but spasms, twitches when the physical therapist came to his room before discharge, to examine him, to give his family a prognosis, to teach them exercises so he didn’t get sores of any kind. It was all exercises about moving his feet, his ankles, his knees, and Noel looked on with full concentration at the doctor’s words since everyone knew it would be him helping.
That day it had been excruciating for Liam, everything was equal parts embarrassing for him and satisfaction since Noel had to carry him around, to get him out of the cab while mam assembled his folded wheelchair they had put on the boot of the car, and then he carried him again when he had to put him to bed. Noel took his time to put his pajamas on him, taking care not to move his head too much, avoiding pulling at his bandages. Stitches are a very delicate matter that Liam knew. When Noel had been putting on his socks, Liam found that he could try and kinda wiggle his toes, it looked like a twitch, kind of a powerful one but Liam was happy about it.
After that day, life had fallen into a routine Liam had quickly had to adapt to. He didn’t go to school anymore, and Noel didn't go to work either, meaning he sat around the house moping about not being a roadie anymore, never out loud saying it was Liam's fault his dreams didn’t pan out. But it made Liam happy, because it never had sat well with him not knowing where Noel was or who he went out with. Louise came by the house some days to see him and talk to Liam, who only looked out the window at the few cars and people that passed by, instead of grunting at her pretending to listen to what she said. A week later, and when Liam could move his ankles and his wrists with a slower normalcy than before, she stopped coming. Liam didn't realise it for a few hours, could only remember that at some point in the night if Louise couldn't physically come by now she would call the house as the Coronation Street music intro started. Tonight Noel was gently combing through his growing hair, careful of the still red scar on his head, the notes of the theme song drifted up from the living room where mom sat watching it like every day of the week. Liam moved his eyes to Noel who was putting the comb back to its place, he moved his pinky and poked at his brother's wrist, when he turned to look Liam said, he tried to say Louise, it only came out as “‘uis”
Noel stared at him for a while, a few seconds probably, until he only said. “Broke up with her.”
“Wa?” Liam said, trying to ask why.
Noel blinked and sat next to him on the bed. “She just couldn't understand that she wasn't my priority anymore.”
Liam swore he smirked that day, but nothing in Noel's demeanor changed to say that Liam had all of a sudden gotten better really fast just because Noel had all but admitted his little brother was more important than his former girlfriend.
One of those days, the days he couldn't count anymore, he lifted his arm to point at one of the biscuits he wanted, the ones his mam brings home, and thanked her, a sound resembling ‘fanks’ more pronounced than before, more clear than ever, and his mother's eyes got misty eyed. She thanked the Lord that apparently Liam was getting better. Noel’s eyes were misty eyed? They were serious, he looked for lack of a better word to describe him in Liam's mind, pissed off. Liam never ever understood why.
He didn’t do that again for a while and not for a lack of trying. Liam tried a lot, when he was with people, when he was doing his exercises with Noel's eagle eyes on him and in front of his family too. He hated seeing his mother's disappointed eyes and hated seeing Paul's unsurprised ones. He felt dizzier, than before, his eyes often went blurry and large chances of his memory went missing, not that they have been good before, but sometimes he could recall stuff, and sometimes he couldn't recall what he'd done all day.
Today he was sitting in front of the telly. Noel had thought it was good to watch a movie together, so that's what they were doing, it wasn’t a good day for a puzzle, Liam’s vision swam more than usual and his hands had stopped working. His mam had called the hospital in the morning, and had gotten no good answer because she went to work quickly afterwards, exchanging murmurs between her and Noel before leaving through the door so quickly Liam couldn’t even grunt her a goodbye.
Noel had wheeled him to the living room and had made him choose the movie, some american film that Noel had wanted to watch over and over again and all because it had a sex scene in it.
Liam felt embarrassed to watch it with Noel beside him, like it was illicit even though Noel let him choose it knowing what it contained. He couldn’t help the way his body reacted to the scene once it played on the telly, and he tried to look the other way even as his cheeks went all red. If he had been normal he would’ve hid his boner with one of the sofa cushions but this time he didn’t even have that dignity and he was left at the mercy of Noel’s teases once he realized what happened.
“Oh lad, don’t be embarrassed,” Noel laughed, tussling his hair. “Your body still works in that way huh?”
His voice now sounded more intrigued than teasing and Liam wanted this topic to go away, he blinked many times, to signal to Noel that they could continue watching the movie in peace and silence, ignoring his problem downstairs. But Noel didn’t see him or maybe pretended not to know because he paused the telly and tugged at his chin so they could see each other eye to eye this time.
“I could help you, aye?” Noel said, looking deep into his eyes searching for an answer that Liam couldn’t move his lips to give. “Business like this ain’t good to leave untreated innit?”
Liam blinked many times, he still didn’t know what he wanted it to mean and Noel had learned to interpret it as he saw fit.
“Good lad.” He said with a smirk, his canines made him look like the hunter who had finally seen his prey walk into the trap he had set. “Nobody has to know, so you can’t get embarrassed uh?”
He didn’t know if what he said was supposed to be reassuring, because he wasn’t reassured, not at all. But Noel didn’t care, his fingers wandered over to his trouser buttons and Liam couldn’t help but look at his face. He literally couldn’t help it, moving his head away was a bit outside of his range of mobility for now. Noel looked up at him and he could see how it instantly bothered him, he lifted his other hand and moves his head towards the telly again.
“No need to watch what I do kidda.” The zipper coming down sounded loud to his ears. “You only need to feel it.”
It’s weird how he can feel everything that rubs against his skin, ever since he came back from the hospital he’s been able to do it, felt the soft fabric of his pajamas, he just can’t move it, can’t do nothing but twitch. Noel’s palm is warm against the fabric of his joggers and soon he deftly takes Liam’s half mast dick out, making him hiss at the lack of friction from his dry palm. Noel spits on it after Liam does that though and it feels better, it makes Liam gasp and Noel huffs like he’s laughing at him, and Liam would say something, he knows it in his being he would say something, shove his brother off of him but he can’t. He just has to sit there in this fucking wheelchair and take it. He gasps when Noel moves his wrist, rubbing the one spot Liam really likes getting rubbed.
“Look at you,” Noel says, shuffling closer to him, his breath directly over Liam’s ear, tickling him. “Shaking like a virgin.”
He burrows his face into Liam’s neck and inhales him, speeding the movements on Liam’s dick, the pleasure rising even more and more and more as Noel starts kissing his neck, murmuring stuff too low for Liam’s shaken mind to hear and process. Not that he wants to right now, words are hard, they had been before he took the hit, and they’re certainly not easier now that half the words in a conversation get lost in his mind, their meanings distorted and incomprehensible, all that he cares about right now is the hand pumping him.
There’s a rhythm to it, the slides up and down and then a flick of the wrist every so pumps, a thumb passing over the slit of his cock that makes Liam almost crazy, his pants grow increasingly louder, almost like moans, but for his voice to come out this handjob would have to be miraculous. But it’s enough that Noel leans away and with his free hand moves Liam’s chin towards him to make him look at him.
“You’re really liking this?” He sounds almost like he doesn’t even believe what he’s saying. They look into each other’s eyes for a second before Noel leans into him to kiss him, his hand moving slower, Liam feels his orgasm farther away and if Noel started this thing he should have to finish it and not get carried away by silly things like kisses, but Liam can’t say say anything and the kiss actually feels nice.
Liam groans and when Noel looks back at him he makes sure to blink, just once, just the yes, and Noel doesn’t need him to say more. He starts to pick up his pace again, flick his wrist just right, thumb at his slit and at a vein that’s just in the right place and Liam is shaking again, breathing heavily into Noel’s lips as his orgasm comes again and Liam lets it wash over him. Noel kisses him again, slowing down his movements as Liam comes down from his high.
“Ahh…” Liam moans when Noel puts pressure on his dick again, down at the base with his thumb and index and going up the shaft like he’s trying to milk him for all Liam’s worth.
“Fuck kidda.” Noel looks down at the sight but Liam wouldn’t do it even if he could, it’s just too embarrassing again. “You’re a sight.”
Liam blinks four times, maybe this could mean why or what, or just a question in general, but the important thing is Noel sees it and smiles at him.
“You’ve been just as beautiful as you always were.”
Liam blinks, even with the shaved head?
“Even with the shaved head.” Noel has always known what Liam means. “You’re always beautiful, my baby, my little brother.”
Liam feels twitches in his face, he hopes it looks enough like a smile for Noel.