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"I will return shortly with more information, Shen shixiong." Mu Qingfang reassures, tucking the pollen sample into his sleeve as he bustles back towards the main road and his waiting mobile-apothecary-slash-carriage.
Shen Qingqiu distractedly waves his fan as he watches Mu Qingfang disappear beyond the treeline, waiting until he's fully and completely out of sight before he allows himself to muffle a quick groan into his hands. He can barely hear it over the cacophony of growls and yowls and huffing and hissing coming from the bowl-shaped depression at the center of the glade, which only gets louder as he descends.
"This master left you alone for five minutes." Shen Qingqiu scolds in the abrupt silence that falls upon his return.
The fluffy brown bear cub standing on his hind legs plops onto his behind like he's still not sure how to balance, mouth closing to hide his sharp teeth. The silver kitten's fur begins to settle, his tail lashing in fury as he maintains a defensive posture.
"Think of the sect's dignity." Shen Qingqiu continues seriously, doing his best to ignore the increasingly lethal amount of moe. "Imagine what people would say, to know the War God and Demon Lord were behaving in such a childish manner."
Liu Qingge's ears flick in annoyance. Luo Binghe bats his dark-as-night, long-lashed, and peerlessly adorable eyes at him. A pale yellow pollen dusts his snout, ears, and cheeks, like he'd stuck his entire face into a bag of old flour. Liu Qingge is mostly clean in contrast, with only a single errant smear left across the top of his head.
"You missed a spot, shidi." Shen Qingqiu says flatly. Liu Qingge immediately inspects his fur with the same thorough intensity he has when cleaning Cheng Luan's blade after a battle.
"No, it's— here." Shen Qingqiu crouches down to help, rubbing the top of Liu Qingge's little kitty head until a small cloud of pollen poofs into the air.
Fans aren't just for enhancing one's poser aura, Shen Qingqiu jokes internally, quickly wafting the cloud away as he continues to indulge the urge to touch his shidi's sleek, soft fur. Liu Qingge barely pays attention to the near miss, glancing towards Luo Binghe with a distinctly unimpressed air before abruptly flattening his ears.
Luo Binghe is staring down Liu Qingge as he slowly approaches, almost looking like a sun bear for how pale his powdered face is.
Astute observational skills, Mew-shidi! Leaving Binghe covered in that much pollen is just asking for trouble. It's probably for the best if someone gets that cub cleaned up a bit.
Specifically, someone who has already been effected by said pollen, and is thus immune to any further effects.
"Well? Go on. Put that tongue to good use." Shen Qingqiu encourages as Liu Qingge continues to glare. Luo Binghe, perhaps finally sensing the urgency of the situation, stops and sits just out of arm's reach.
Shen Qingqiu gently pushes Liu Qingge forward. Luo Binghe growls and clacks his teeth.
"Oh hush. Behave." Shen Qingqiu scolds.
Luo Binghe growls again, more quietly this time, and looks away, as if to emphasize how little threat Liu Qingge poses to him.
Liu Qingge takes a single cautious step closer, looks back over his shoulder, and leans in to give Luo Binghe's cheek a tentative lick.
Shen Qingqiu can't help the smile that crosses his face. Cute!!! So cute!!!!! Undeniably, squee-inducingly, heart-stoppingly cute!!!!!!!!!! Ah, if only Shen Qingqiu had a smartphone; this would have gone hella viral on B*libili.
Liu Qingge's remaining hesitation disappears entirely when Luo Binghe doesn't react, viciously attacking his fluffy cheeks. Luo Binghe continues sitting oh-so-patiently, paws flat on the mossy ground in front of him as he watches for Shen Qingqiu's reaction.
"Be good and sit still for a minute, Binghe." Shen Qingqiu says, pressing the guard of his fan to his closed mouth.
Luo Binghe blinks guilelessly, eyes shining like dark pearls in the warm afternoon sunlight. Truly, the protagonist is unparalleled in all aspects! No creature, mythical or demonic, could hope to measure up to the cuteness that is cub Luo Binghe!!
"So obedient." Shen Qingqiu coos. "What a good boy."
Luo Binghe wriggles in place a bit, clearly happy at the praise. Liu Qingge pushes himself back, standing nearly upright on his hind paws as he looks over his hard work, Luo Binghe's dark brown fur sticking up in damp peaks where he's finished his very thorough cleaning.
Shen Qingqiu snaps his fan open to hide the twitch of his lips.
Ahhh, he really wants to bury his face in the two of them, but he has to hold back — at least until Mu Qingfang returns with more information. While there are a handful of plants in Proud Immortal Demon Way that curse those that ingest their pollen to take an animal form, none of them should effect the immune-to-all-poisons protagonist. For all they know, this could be an as of yet undiscovered species with horrific long-term side effects!
Liu Qingge seems to be satisfied with the side he's been attacking, setting his front paws back on the mossy ground and walking directly in front of Luo Binghe; presumably to continue his grooming on the cub's other, still very much pollen-covered side. Luo Binghe silently opens his mouth as he passes, catching Liu Qingge's trailing tail in his teeth.
Getting between Luo Binghe and his shizun… Liu Qingge really should have expected the clingy cub to get upset!
Predictably, Liu Qingge hisses and swats at Luo Binghe's face, leaving a few shallow scratches across his snout that don't even have time to bleed before healing shut. Luo Binghe turns to stare his shishu directly in the eyes, tail still gently held between his — now very bared — teeth. Liu Qingge's fur stands on end, a yowl building in his chest.
"Try that again, and you know what will happen," Shen Qingqiu says in a low, cold voice; clearly a mimicry of Binghe's typical tone from court. "Is that it?"
Luo Binghe huffs, mouth still stubbornly shut. Liu Qingge's ears flick back.
"Unhand me, you brute!" Shen Qingqiu says, forcing the air from his lungs in a stern half-shout. Liu Qingge's yowling cuts out abruptly. "Yes, yes, shidi, he's being quite the brute right now."
Liu Qingge turns his face away from the two of them, though his ears are still pointed attentively towards Shen Qingqiu. Pretending not to care, hm? He can practically hear Liu Qingge's typical dismissive scoff.
Shen Qingqiu takes a step closer, gently tapping Luo Binghe's side with the tip of his boot.
"Let your shishu have his tail back, Binghe."
Luo Binghe bats his eyes, hunching over to make himself even smaller. Bear cub? What bear cub? All Shen Qingqiu can see is a hundred kilo teddy bear.
"This disciple is being careful." Shen Qingqiu narrates helpfully. "Yes, of course. Binghe is the most gentle, the most sweet cub this master has ever met, impossibly cute and intelligent, with a loveliness unmatched by any other creature."
His disciple tucks his head down further, as if in embarrassment. Liu Qingge whips his tail free, spinning around to keep it far from the cub's teeth, and stretches upwards to prop his front paws on Luo Binghe's side, beginning to clean his left cheek.
"Shameful, to let yourself be caught off guard by a plant." Shen Qingqiu continues, blatantly putting words in Liu Qingge's mouth. He taps his fan shut against his palm, shaking his head. "Don't blame Binghe too much, Liu shidi, he's just a cub."
Liu Qingge ignores him and his hilarious commentary, continuing to lick, and lick, and lick. Luo Binghe wriggles in place, clearly struggling to hold still. Shen Qingqiu's fingertips itch to join in on touching his perfectly round and softly-furred ears.
He squats down in front of Luo Binghe instead, still keeping a modest distance away, and self-indulgently runs the tip of his fan across his disciple's fluffy chest. Luo Binghe nearly begins vibrating with suppressed excitement. Shen Qingqiu can't help but continue! It can't be that dangerous if he's not using his hands, right?
After a minute or two of poking and stroking to his content, Shen Qingqiu hears the strangest sound—like a motor failing to turn over.
Hold on, do bears purr!? Ahh, Shen Qingqiu's heart feels like it's going to burst!!!!!!
"Shizun should touch this disciple." Shen Qingqiu coos in a mimicry of Binghe's sticky-sweet loving shizun voice. "This disciple is so soft, surely shizun wants to?"
Luo Binghe bats his big, dark, glistening eyes, still rumbling impatiently as he waits for Shen Qingqiu to give in and sink his fingers into that thick, dark fur. Shen Qingqiu barely catches himself in time, hand half-extended before he catches sight of Binghe's damp, cowcatlicked face, the drier patches still coated in whatever pollen caused this whole incident in the first place.
"This master will have to give you a real bath before you get in bed tonight." Shen Qingqiu says sternly, propping his chin on his hand. No matter how much spit Liu Qingge uses, it's no replacement for soap.
Luo Binghe slumps miserably at the cruel denial of pets, nearly unbalancing Liu Qingge. The kitten glares at Shen Qingqiu, tail lashing, the tip of his pink, raspy tongue still sticking out.
Did he think Shen Qingqiu meant to wash him, as well?
"Is warm water too good for Liu shidi?" Shen Qingqiu teases. "Should this master dunk you in the river instead?"
Liu Qingge's tongue retreats into his mouth, his back paws inching away.
"This master knows you prefer roughing it out in the wilds, but surely one bath won't kill you?"
Luo Binghe snorts.
"Liu shishu is always welcome to use our bath." Shen Qingqiu murmurs sweetly. "Oh, Binghe, how sweet of you to say! See, shidi? No need to be stubborn."
Luo Binghe huffs in offense, rising to all fours. Liu Qingge does topple backwards, this time, barely twisting enough to catch himself. He stands stiffly, facing away from the two of them, his tail straight upright and the tip twitching about like a leaf caught in a breeze.
"Who knew you cared so much about your shishu." Shen Qingqiu says lightly, tapping his fan on Binghe's head, his shoulder, tracing down the outside of his arm. Luo Binghe bounces impatiently on his front paws, like a large dog barely holding back from jumping on his owner after being left alone at home all day.
"This disciple deeply admires shishu's strength and martial prowess, and cannot wait to spar him once again!" Shen Qingqiu continues, purposefully misinterpreting the cause of his eagerness. A chuckle escapes him as Luo Binghe's brow contorted into an all-too-human expression of disbelieving shock. "If it's that important to you, this master supposes you two could resume your spar after your bath."
Luo Binghe clacks his teeth and crouches. Shen Qingqiu doesn't even have time to feel nervous before he—
Shakes!! Himself!! Clean!!
Shen Qingqiu wriggles and rolls around, struggling to escape from his now proportionally giant pile of robes. He finally feels a light breeze cross his nose, shoving the front of his muzzle out of the layers and layers of silk, whiskers twinging unpleasantly. He crawls out with as much dignity as he can muster.
Luo Binghe is already laying down in apology, his big, dark eyes watching Shen Qingqiu with rapt attention.
Shen Qingqiu ignores him, licking a snow-white paw to try and fix his disheveled appearance. A paw! What are the odds Shen Qingqiu would be a kitten as well? If anything, he'd expected the original goods to turn into a crane, or some sort of poisonous insect.
No, wait, more importantly, why didn't he even think to hesitate before licking himself???
Liu Qingge appears at his side within moments, sitting on his haunches and leaning in to assist with grooming. Shen Qingqiu presses a paw to the top of his head, right on the darker grey mark in the middle of his brow, and firmly pushes him away. Who, exactly, is the shixiong here? Let this master keep a little bit of face!
A shadow falls across the two of them. Wet, warm air puffs across the back of Shen Qingqiu's twitching ears.
Chugging vinegar already? This clingy child. Shen Qingqiu internally rolls his eyes, turning around and raising a paw towards his disciple, who eagerly leans down to receive a scolding. Shen Qingqiu baps his forehead a few times, right where his demon mark would be, claws carefully retracted.
There. Scolded!
Something lightly brushes his fur. Shen Qingqiu glances to the side to see Liu Qingge's dark-tipped tail is laying across his own. He appreciatively headbutts his shidi's shoulder. Liu Qingge stridently avoids eye contact.
A massive snout shoves its way between them. Luo Binches whines, his eye close enough that Shen Qingqiu can see his own reflection in its infinite depths. His all-white fur is short and sleek, his whiskers are long and elegant, and his eyes seem to be just as verdant as Qing Jing peak. All in all, a decently handsome cat, enough so that the permanent crick at the tip of his tail seems a bit out of place.
Luo Binghe shoves even closer, whuffing. Shen Qingqiu headbutts him as well, rubbing his cheek along the bridge of his nose. It feels good. Like he's protecting Luo Binghe, somehow.
It seems the instincts of these bodies are quite hard to ignore, Shen Qingqiu thinks, rubbing and rubbing and rubbing until something begins to catch in his throat. No wonder these two were fighting like cats and... and bears. He licks the tip of Luo Binghe's nose, his cheek, his jaw, background birdsong drowned out by the sound of increasingly loud purring.
The fur beneath his tongue disappears. Something wraps around his waist.
"I've been gone for less than a shichen." Mu Qingfang says tightly.
"Shizun, you're being scolded." Luo Binghe coos. Shen Qingqiu continues meowing and purring in Luo Binghe's lap, wriggling around as every inch of his body is poked and rubbed and pet and squished. A furious yowling emanates from a knotted pile of Liu Qingge’s robes a few paces away.
Mu Qingfang walks over to grab the makeshift sack, holding it out at arm's length as it writhes.
"...Next time Luo shizhi can dismiss the effects of an unknown substance, it would be best to let me know before I attempt to create an antidote for something capable of overpowering a Heavenly Demon's resistance."
"This lord will keep Mu shishu's advice in mind." Luo Binghe says evenly, squishing Shen Qingqiu’s pink paw pads. The kitten bites the side of his hand in annoyance, grinding his teeth a moment before gently licking the spot he'd just bit, still purring all the while.
Mu Qingfang leaves the glade with his loud, ungrateful test subject, wisely deciding to give up on the lecture.