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They defeated Father over a week ago, and yet still everyone keeps turning down his offers of bedrooms in the palaces. Instead, they've set up camp in the garden just as they did everywhere else they've stayed. Aang says he couldn't bear to sleep where Appa couldn't be, Katara dodges his insistence, Toph just keeps flicking pebbles at his head the more he offers, and everyone else shrugs him off.
"Look, if you're so sick of camping out with us, Mister Firelord, you can go sleep in a bedroom," Sokka says around his thumb, which is jammed into his mouth to pick between his teeth with. It isn't the first time Zuko considered it, but the campfire is already going for tonight, and his shirt is open while Katara works on healing his lightning scar.
"I would rather he didn't, Sokka," Katara scolds.
Sokka shrugs, "I'm just saying, with how much he's asking I think he might want to."
Zuko sighs, and resists dropping his head in Katara's way. "No," he says, "I'm just trying to be a good host and offer you all real beds."
Aang practically starts bouncing in place as Zuko talks before cutting in immediately after and saying, "We could drag all the beds out here and sleep under the stars!"
Toph flicks a larger rock at Aang, who dodges. "Good idea, Twinkle Toes! Except, we're already sleeping under the stars." Aang deflates a little at that and nods in agreement.
Katara's hands finally retract from his chest, bringing her water with them as she swoops it neatly back into her hip flask. He nods at her in thanks as she retreats back to her sleeping bag, there is no real response to it. Conversation drifts from their sleeping arrangements to the future once again. He listens, mostly, laid back on top of his sleeping bag with a silk pillow he'd stolen from his childhood bedroom under his head. The heat of the fire slowly lulls him to sleep, and he barely remembers the conversation come morning.
Himself and Aang are the first to rise in the morning, their routine of meditation still unbroken. However, now he doesn't take his leave from the circle until long after they finish. Suki is the next to wake, watching them quietly as she puts away her bedding. Katara, if asked, will say she woke up very shortly after Suki. However, in reality, she barely woke up before Sokka. As always, Toph sleeps in the latest, and with zero shame. She snores away spread eagle and barely contained in her sleeping bag with her hair in a nest. Zuko has no doubts that she slept soundly. The palace staff bring out breakfast just as she's waking up, their timing impeccable after a week of putting up with them all.
Zuko's plans were much the same as always, sending out as many orders as possible to halt the war before negotiations can be made with other leaders. As much as he wants to order an immediate withdrawal, he knows that these things need to be discussed with the other kingdom's beforehand, especially after 100 years. Lucky enough for him there's many meetings to take place in about a week in the Earth kingdom. Aang has promised to bring them all there on Appa. After breakfast he slips away to his office, ignores the drape of the curtains behind his desk, and sets to writing.
Just as he's pondering whether or not he has access to enough messenger hawks to send out all of these orders in one go Katara slips into the room. She's holding a plate of food, and refusing to look him in the eye. He accepts it with a bow of his head, and a quiet thank you.
"I just wanted to.." and then she hesitates, still avoiding looking in his eyes. She takes a little breath and then continues, "…remind… you, that I've got to heal you after you eat."
"Of course," he concedes with no argument, he knows from experience that this is a much kinder healing experience than what it should be. "Have you eaten?" She confirms, and so he digs in. He eats in a rush, not wanting to keep her waiting for longer than necessary.
The water she heals him with sucks the heat out of his wound. It also tickles, the faint way it brushes against his unmarred skin forcing him to focus more on not kicking her than on anything else. This is the shortest of the healing sessions, and she doesn't look anywhere near as tired as she usually does when she stands up with a little sigh and ducked head. She leaves only a moment after and Zuko settles back into his work. The palace staff have taken easily to his new role as Firelord, but the same cannot be said about much of the kingdom. His Father's propaganda runs deep, he should know.
Toph is the one who comes to drag him out of his office today as dinner comes closer. His door slams open to reveal her standing there grinning ear to ear. "C'mon, Sparky," she says, "before I make you."
He pushes his chair back and stands, his wound surprisingly making no protest with the movement. "Toph, please don't destroy the palace," he sighs.
He sits between Sokka and Toph tonight, and gratefully accepts his food from the woman handing it to him. He's yet to learn all of his staff's name, but when he goes to thank her and comes up empty on a name he vows to change that. Dinner isn't quiet, he's not sure that's possible, but it is quieter than normal. Katara eats her entire plate without saying a word to anyone, she barely even notices when Toph knocks Sokka on the head with too-large of a rock, and Sokka in turn tries to put her in a headlock. He fails, of course, not even getting with an arms reach of the earthbender. Zuko covers up his chuckle as Sokka slams onto his back with another bite of food.
"Zuko," Katara's voice is heavy, and he almost misses it under Aang's laughter, "I'm sorry, it's going to scar."
Oh, that's it? "It's ok, what's another scar from family?" He laughs a little at his own joke, but it suffocates quick when the entire camp stills and stares. There's a massive boulder hovering above Aang's head that shatters into dust as Toph whips around to look at Zuko with clenched fists. "What?"
"What do you mean 'what'?" Sokka shouts.
"Why are you all looking at me like that?"
Sokka takes a deep breath as if he's about to start shouting again, but Katara cuts in quicker, "What do you mean 'another', Zuko?"
He pauses for a moment trying to remember if he ever told them about his eye. He comes up empty, but surely they heard about it from somewhere? It's the Fire Nations worse kept secret, because it was never meant to be one anyways. "Have I really never told you about my eye?" From the way Aang perks up he can assume that no, he hasn't, and they're all curious. "It's really not all that interesting of a story. When I was thirteen-"
"Thirteen?!" Sokka cuts him off again.
"Yes, as I was saying, when I was thirteen I went with my Uncle to a war meeting. He warned me to keep my mouth shut, but I thought I knew better than all of those general's. I still think I did, they had no right to use the new recruits as bait, but that's not the point. Look, I disrespected my father by speaking out of turn so he challenged me to an Agni Kai-"
"He WHAT?" Aang demands, a burst of air washing over the group with his screech.
"Can you just let me finish the story? He challenged me to an Agni Kai, I refused to fight him, so he, he burned my face to teach me a lesson before banishing me with a mission to find the Avatar." He shrugs, ignores the memory of burning flesh trying to invade his nose, and takes the final bite of his food.
There silence for a moment before Suki speaks, "You are sixteen, right?" He nods, throat a little too tight to reasonably speak.
"13, 14, 15, 16," Aang counts out quickly, "THREE YEARS? You had been looking for me for three years already?"
"Yes?"
"Aang, I don't care about your morals anymore, I'm killing that motherfucker," Sokka declares.
"It's really not that big of a deal, he's already locked up, ok?" Zuko complains.
"Not that big of a deal? Not that big of a deal? You listen here, Zuko, he would've deserved worse than he got for a lot less. He burnt half your face off!" Katara is getting close to screaming now, and Zuko can see staff watching them through the windows.
He takes a breath, "Can we please quiet down a little?"
"Quiet down? No! You're acting like he told you to go clean your room when he burnt you. Those are NOT equivalent!"
Zuko shoves up to standing, plate left on the ground, "Look, I know what he did was disproportionate and completely undeserved! All of it was, I was a child, a thirteen year old boy, but what's done is done. I'm telling you it's fine, he's gotten his punishment, and I'm satisfied."
Suki butts in, "Sokka, I'm joining you." She turns to him before continuing, "He got his punishment for the war, this is his punishment for abusing you."
"It wasn't- it's not. Besides, his punishment for this," he gestures at his scar, "cannot be worse than his punishment for waging war against the entire world!"
"It can and will be," Toph counters.
He doesn't notice the fire growing in time with his aggravated breaths, not until it bursts into a beacon of light when he finally yells, "NO! It's FINE!" He kicks at the dirt as he whips around and storms inside the palace. He finds his childhood bedroom, not the one the Firelord is supposed to sleep in and flops onto the bed. In the summer it's much too warm to sleep under the blankets, so he doesn't.
He doesn't end up falling asleep. At first he was just too angry at his friends, they didn't understand, they refused to listen to him. But slowly the pungent smell of burning flesh seeps back into his room, into his mind. He barely remembers the pain most days, but as it flickers into his mind tonight it's all he can remember. Distantly he knows he's barely breathing despite the fact that he's still as a rock in his bed. He plays through the loop of the Agni Kai again and again and again, his Father's face warping more and more with the heat of his hand with each loop.
The lamps in his room burst alight in sync as his door slams open. It's just Sokka in the doorway, who takes a slow step inside. Zuko shoots up then, whirling around to face his friend while seated on the bed.
"Whoa, easy there," Sokka says, hands raised in what Zuko has learned to be a placating manner. That doesn't stop him from flinching at the movement, and then scolding himself for the weakness. "I'm just here to check in on you, buddy, you seemed pretty upset when you stormed away back there."
"Yeah, because none of you were listening to me!"
Sokka sits on Zuko's floor then, across from him. Zuko doesn't look him in the eyes, instead staring over his head. "Well, I'm here to listen now."
He swallows, barely notices as the scent of burning flesh starts to dissipate, and then stutters into the start of a sentence, "Look, I know, I've realized, uh. My father he, he challenged me, a thirteen year old boy to an Agni Kai, and that's fucked! It's so fucked up, and I think I hate him, no, I know. It was a futile quest he sent me on, and I tried for years anyways. I spent my entire life trying, and it was NEVER good enough! But you all killing him is disproportionate, it won't solve anything!" He's heaving for breath when he finally clamps his mouth shut and looks at Sokka with wide eyes.
"It is proportionate. Hurting a child, your child is nothing like harming another adult you have no power over. His one true duty in life, as your father, should have been to protect you, to help you grow, and he didn't. In fact, not only did he not protect you, he is the person that harmed you. It's despicable, and deserves consequence."
"No, no, he wasn't a good father by any means, but he's been punished. It's fine, Sokka."
"Alright, we'll leave it. But, Zuko, know that we're on your side in all of this, all of us, we're here for you." The other man, no, the other teen stands then and sits beside Zuko on his bed. Zuko doesn't miss when he glances quickly at the door then says, "I know the other's can be a little overbearing at the best of times, so I'm assuming you want to stay in here tonight?" Zuko nods, he knows he doesn't have it in him to face their concern again tonight. "Alright! Can I sleep in here too?"
"The floor is free," Zuko concedes.
Sokka's gasp is both fake and over-dramatic, "You, my dear friend Firelord Zuko, would be so unkind as to make me, his best friend and favorite warrior Sokka, sleep on the floor when there's a perfectly good bed for us to share?"
"Fine." He tries to glare, but can't control the way the corners of his mouth twitch up into a faint smile as Sokka bounces around his room in excitement before sliding under the covers.
"Get under here so we can sleep!" Sokka demands, and Zuko listens with a sigh. "EW! Why are you so warm?"
"I'm a firebender," Zuko deadpans before immediately breaking into snickers. Sokka sighs, but stays pressed against Zuko's side anyways. The two of them fall asleep like that.