Work Text:
*The video begins with a view of Shane and Ilya sitting at an oak wood dining room table. In front of them are two bowls, filled with water, and towels placed around them. Yuna Hollander is seen standing behind them*
Ilya: Hello everybody, you guys liked our last video so much we decided to make another one.
Shane: I wouldn’t say we decided to do this Ilya. You decided we should do this.
Yuna: Oh c’mon Shane this will be fun! Don’t be such a downer honey.
*Yuna fluffs Shane’s hair like a little kid*
Shane: Mom…don’t encourage him please.
*Ilya claps his hands once*
Ilya: Okie let’s do this. David will read the questions and Yuna will answer by dunking our faces in these bowls.
*David pokes his head into frame and waves at the camera with a smile on his face*
David: Okay first question, who is more dedicated to their job?
*Yuna dunks Shane*
Shane: Fuck that’s cold! Ilya did you fill mine with cold on purpose?
*Ilya winks at Shane and Shane makes a grumpy face*
Shane: Really? You are such an ass–
*Ilya cuts Shane off*
Ilya: David that was obvious question, throw a golf ball next time.
Shane: You mean hard ball? Like a harder question.
*Ilya rolls his eyes dramatically*
Ilya: Yes sure, whatever you say.
David: Who talks to you the most?
*Yuna dunks Ilya*
Shane: What?? I call you almost everyday!
Yuna: He texts me good morning everyday, and he usually asks me how my day was at the end.
*Shane glares at Ilya who has a mischievous grin on his face*
Shane: Oh my god you are such a suck up.
Ilya: No I am not! I just love Mama more than you.
Shane: Bullshit! You are–
*Yuna dunks both of them in their bowls and holds them for a moment before letting them back up. Both are coughing slightly from being unprepared to be dunked*
Yuna: I’m not going to tolerate the fighting, knock it off or I’m done. Am I making myself clear?
Both: Yes mom.
*David can be heard laughing under his breath behind the camera*
David: Who gives the best gifts?
*Yuna dunks Ilya*
Ilya: Oh, so no comment on that one?
Shane: No. I know that one is right, you are very thoughtful. You have a list in your notes app of all of our names and things you think they might like as gifts. You pick gifts out with your heart.
Yuna: Aw honey is that true? You are so sweet.
*Yuna leans down and hugs Ilya as pink spreads across his cheeks. Shane is smiling at his husband*
Ilya: David please next question, she is choking me.
David: Who can skate the fastest?
*Yuna dunks Shane*
Ilya: Yuna really?
Yuna: He beat you at All Stars.
Ilya: Barely.
*They all laugh at that, clearly this conversation has been had more than once*
David: Who would you call in an emergency?
Yuna dunks Shane again*
Shane: Really? I didn’t see that one coming
Ilya: Me either…
Yuna: Shane you would freak out but then snap into Captain Shane Hollander mode because you are just like me. Ilya, I love you sweetheart, but you are probably the emergency.
*Shane and Ilya exchange a look before bursting into laughter*
Ilya: That is a good point.
David: Who is most likely to bring home a stray animal?
*Shane dunks Ilya’s head in the bowl before Yuna even has time to react*
Ilya: Shane! You are not Yuna, you can’t dunk me.
Shane: Ilya you literally did bring home a stray dog. She was going to pick you, trust me.
*Ilya looks at Yuna hoping she would side with him, but she gives him a look that says, “He’s not wrong.” *
Ilya: David they are ganging up on me.
David: Son, they have been doing that to me since the day Shane was born. Don’t look to me for help because I can’t even help myself.
*The screen turns to a baby picture of Yuna and Shane. He is around 6 months old and smiling at her. The text says, “David sent this picture in with the video so I had to include it! - Harris” *
David: Who causes the most trouble?
*Yuna dunks Ilya so fast he didn’t hold his breath and comes back up coughing*
Ilya: Yuna! Are you trying to kill me??
Yuna: I think you are trying to kill me sometimes with your Tweets. I think Farah would agree, right Shane?
*Shane covers his mouth with his hand, trying not to laugh*
Ilya: Hollander, do not say a word.
David: Who’s the most dramatic?
*Yuna dunks both Ilya and Shane*
Shane: Me too?
Yuna: I was going to pick only you but then I remembered Ilya’s reaction two weekends ago when I forgot to buy his favorite ice cream.
Ilya: I had been looking forward to it all week!
Yuna: You pouted for 20 minutes.
Ilya: Cookies and cream ice cream is a big deal to me.
All of the Hollanders: We know.
Ilya: This game is starting to feel like personal attack.
David: Okay this is the last one. I need to stand up for this one.
*David moves into frame and stands behind Shane*
David: Who is your favorite child?
*Yuna dunks Ilya and David dunks Shane*
Shane: YOU PICKED ILYA? MOM WHAT THE HELL?
Yuna: Shane relax, your dad picked you.
Shane: Because he knew you were going to pick Ilya over me! I can’t believe this.
Ilya: I’m not sure why you are surprised Shanya, she says it all the time that I am her favorite son.
*Shane crosses his arms and sinks into his seat like a little kid*
Shane: This game is stupid.
This video, like their previous one, blows up on every platform. And of course, Twitter once again goes nuts over the whole thing.
@ OttawaCensOffical✅- The Hollanders had a great time playing their own version of Who’s Who!
Enjoy and we will see you guys tonight at 7pm vs Boston!
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@ OttawaCensOffical✅
➡️ @ bostonlovesroz - I did NOT have the Boston Menace being Yuna Hollander’s favorite child on my 2022 bingo card
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@ OttawaCensOffical✅
➡️ @ shanelovesilya - David Hollander you are officially my favorite. You sent in a baby picture and you made sure Shane didn’t feel left out 😭#DavidHollanderGOAT
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@ shanelovesilya
➡️ @ HollanderDavid - I’m not sure why you called me a goat but thank you anyway! 🙂
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@ HollanderDavid
➡️ @ shanelovesilya - Umm?? Hi David, it means “Greatest of all time,” also?? This is your only tweet, did you make this account just to reply? 😭
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Liked by David Hollander and Ilya Rozanov
@ OttawaCensOffical✅
➡️@ hollanov69 - Shane “Babygirl” Hollander and Ilya “Heart eyes” Rozanov prove they are competitive even off the ice in less than 10 minutes via tiktok trend
💬37 🔁93 ❤️167
@ OttawaCensOffical✅
➡️ @ T.Barrett✅ - Watching Hollzy pout at the end is the best part #CaptainPityParty
*gif of Shane pouting*
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@ T.Barrett✅
➡️@ IlyaRoz81✅ - Your body will never be found if you don’t watch yourself Barrett.
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@ OttawaCensOffical✅
➡️@ censforthewins - “sweetheart you are the emergency” IS SENDING MEEE
Ilya Rozanov never change omfg
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Liked by Shane Hollander
➡️@ censforthewin - SHANE?? The whole fam is active on twitter rn bro
@ OttawaCensOffical✅
➡️ @ puckingluvhockey - Ilya being surprised they picked him for “who causes the most trouble” is hilarious, honey your nickname is The Boston Menace and Russia’s Greatest Love Machine…who are you trying to fool
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@ OttawaCensOffical✅
➡️ @ hockeyfan3 - I just know it didn’t take much to convince Yuna to dunk these two idiots in cold water
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Liked by Yuna Hollander and Rose Landry
@ OttawaCensOffical✅
➡️@BenandJerrys✅ - Hey Yuna! We’d love to send you some ice cream so you’ll never run out of Ilya’s favorite again!
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@ BenandJerrys✅
➡️@ IlyaRoz81✅ - @YunaHollander Pick up the phone right now, i’ve called you 4 times, please answer
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@ BenandJerrys✅
➡️@YunaHollander - Only if you promise to throw in some of the non-dairy cookie dough flavor for Shane.
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@YunaHollander
➡️@BenandJerrys✅ - You got it! ❤️
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@IlyaRoz81✅ - This is the best day of all my life.
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