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Gus stopped sweeping when the door opened, ready to tell the would-be patron that Shorty’s was closed. Instead, she directed the individual to the corner booth where her last customer of the night sat drinking straight from a bottle of whiskey.
Calling the Sheriff’s Department at this time of night was common, but Gus never imagined she would have to call Sheriff Haught to collect Jeremy Chetri. The young genius never struck Gus as a drinker, but she’d been wrong about people before and likely would be again.
Nicole tipped her Stetson as she walked past Gus before sliding into the booth across from Jeremy.
“Hey there, JerBear. Everything okay?” Nicole asked softly. He responded by attempting to guide the whiskey bottle to his lips.
“Whoa, let’s take a break for a while,“ Nicole suggested, as she took the bottle from him and placed it out of his reach.
Jeremy started laughing, a full-on belly laugh which eventually turned into sad whimpers. He leaned forward, dropping his head on the table, and closed his eyes.
“I’m gay, Nicole,” he mumbled.
“Ummm… okay. Thank you for trusting me with that.“ Nicole was well aware of this fact. She and her wife, Waverly, often double-dated with Jeremy and his boyfriend, Robin.
“Jeremy, Shorty’s is closed. Let’s get you home,” Nicole urged as she stood and grasped his hand.
“No,” Jeremy snapped, yanking his hand back to pound on the table. “One more round, Barkeep! Drinks for the house on me.” Jeremy chuckled, “I’ve always wanted to say that.”
“No more drinking. Let’s go, or I will toss you in the drunk tank for the night,” Nicole stated firmly. “Champ is already there. You can keep each other company.”
“I’m gay, Nicole,” Jeremy repeated.
“We’ve established that, Jer.”
“Like really, really gay.”
“Jer-“
“But my groin has the utter… audacity… to be in love with Bunny Loblaw!” Jeremy shouted.
The sound of the broom falling to the floor echoed through the mostly empty room. Gus quickly flipped the bolt, put up the closed sign, and grabbed three bottles from behind the bar. After pressing the stunned Sheriff back into the booth, she slid in next to her. There was no way Gus was going to miss whatever happened next.
“Start from the beginning, Jeremy,” Nicole said, her face still showing her shock.
✨
Vivian Chetri began working for the Black Badge Division immediately upon graduating from college. Jeremy had asked his mother to tell him the story of his parents’ whirlwind romance every night before bed for as long as he could remember. He loved listening to the story and how his mother lit up when speaking of his father.
Unfortunately, he never met the man. He died before Jeremy was born. Mitchell Jeremy Chetri also worked for the Black Badge Division, but in a unit that Vivian did not have clearance to access. BBD had no shortage of gossip, though. It was believed that those who worked in Mr. Chetri’s unit had special abilities, including an employee who could turn into a dragon.
On Jeremy’s eighth birthday, Vivian was informed that he would be forced to live in that locked unit. She would be able to visit him on Sundays. Vivian immediately packed, and the two fled in her tiny car.
That was Jeremy’s last memory of his mother. He woke in the medical unit, wrapped in bandages and an IV in his arm. He was told that his mother had died when their car crashed.
The doctors explained that his hips and pelvic bones had shattered. Fortunately, BBD had medical advancements that are not available to most. His bones were rebuilt, enabling him to walk again.
Jeremy had always known he would lose his mother on his birthday. He had tried to warn his mother multiple times, but she would tell him he couldn’t know such things.
But Jeremy knew things.
Once he was back on his feet, the unit director sat him down and asked him about his ability to know things.
When Jeremy hesitated, the doctor said, “It’s okay to talk about it, Jeremy.”
“Mom, said I shouldn’t.”
“She didn’t understand what a great gift you were given. I knew your father. Did you know he had the same gift as you?”
Jeremy looked at the man with excitement, “Really?”
“Yes,” the director said, happy to have made a connection with the boy. “He knew things.” The director looked pointedly around the room. “This is the room your dad lived in when he was young.”
Jeremy squinted his eyes, trying to determine if this man was lying.
“I’m serious, Jeremy. Your dad lived here, in this very room. He moved in here when he was eight years old. I made sure it was assigned to you.”
The doctor patted the boy’s back. “Cool, huh?”
“Cool,” Jeremy nodded.
✨
“I always thought you had the sight.” Gus was the first to speak after Jeremy finished his story.
“You did?” Jeremy slurred.
“Son, people don’t just show up at a bar with a fire extinguisher,” before Jeremy could protest, Gus continued, “and then have the need to use that extinguisher for a small fire in a trash bin.”
“Yeah, I guess that was pretty obvious,” Jeremy agreed with a shrug. “Did you know, too, Nicole?”
“Waverly and I have noticed a few things. We figured you would talk about it if, and when, you were ready,” Nicole shrugged. “So, this is something you could always do?”
“Yeah, but after my mom died, BBD tried to get me to fine-tune my ability.”
“What do you mean?” Nicole asked.
“It’s not something I do consciously. I couldn’t predict tomorrow’s lottery numbers or anything like that. I get a feeling or a vision about something not long before it happens.”
“And BBD wanted you to develop this skill to tell them about the future,” Nicole grumbled.
“Yeah. They were disappointed when they realized I had no control over what I saw. Or, who I see things about. They wanted me to be able to direct them. But I only see things occasionally. And…”
“And?” Gus urged after his words trailed off.
Jeremy flopped his head back down onto the table. “And it only works for people I care about. The more I care about someone, the more clearly I see things.”
“What do you mean by clearly?” Gus asked.
“Most of my visions are rather vague. But because I’m so close with Robin, I know he’ll call Nicole in a moment to see if she’s heard from me. My phone battery died a while ago,” he added with a one-shoulder shrug.
“Jeremy-“ Nicole was cut off by her phone’s ringtone. Glancing at the screen, she saw that it was, indeed, Robin.
“Hello.”
“Nicole, have you seen Jeremy? His phone goes right to voicemail. Waverly and I are at the BBD office. We came here thinking he was caught up in work and lost track of time.”
“Robin. I’m with him right now,” Nicole explained.
He sighed in relief before she heard him say, “He’s with Nicole.”
“Where the heck is Nicole? She said she would be home an hour ago.”
Nicole heard Waverly in the background and was sure she would find numerous texts from her worried wife.
“Where are you two?” Robin asked.
“We’re at Shorty’s with Gus. Jeremy,” Nicole sighed. “Well, Jeremy’s upset and is dealing with it like every Earp, or Earp-adjacent.”
“So he’s plowed.” Robin deadpanned.
“Yup,” Nicole said, popping the ‘p’.
“We’ll be right there.”
✨
Thirty minutes later, the group of five was found sitting around a table with fresh cups of coffee. Gus brewed it while Waverly was brought up to speed, since Robin was already aware of the situation.
Robin had Jeremy wrapped up in his arms, “Honey, I’m here now. Along with our best friends. No one here is going to judge you about this.”
“Jeremy, we would never judge you. You were born with an extraordinary ability,” Waverly said.
“I’m referring to his friendship with Bunny,” Robin replied quietly.
“Oh. Well-“ Nicole huffed when her wife elbowed her in the ribs. “Nope, no judging, JerBear.” Nicole had to sit on her hand so she wouldn’t ruffle the adorably distraught man’s hair.
“So… Bunny,” Waverly started for her friend.
“Bunny.” Jeremy nodded before taking a sip of coffee, wincing when it burned his tongue. Taking a deep breath, he started. “About two months ago, I was at the diner. Robin and I were supposed to meet for dinner, but he had to cancel.”
Waverly gave Robin a questioning look that bordered on anger on Jeremy’s behalf.
“I had to help my dad. His nurse was in a fender bender on her way over,” Robin said in his defense. He was a caregiver for his father, who had Parkinson’s.
All eyes returned to Jeremy, encouraging him to continue.
✨
“It’s okay, Babe. Really. I’ll pick up some food for all three of us and head over. Go ahead and set up the game. He likes the meatloaf, right? Okay, see you soon.” Jeremy pocketed his phone and took a seat at the counter.
“Hey, Jeremy. No Robin tonight?” Carla asked.
“No, but I need to pick up dinner for three tonight. Gonna spend the evening with both Jett men while they lose to me at Monopoly,” Jeremy laughed. “It’s hot in here tonight.”
“Yeah. The heater’s stuck on high.”
Jeremy removed his hoodie while he placed his order, “I’ll get that right in. It’ll be at least 15 minutes.“
“No hurry,” he said cheerfully. He was scrolling on his phone when someone bumped him as they took the seat next to him.
“Oh, sorry,” Jeremy said, looking up to see Bunny Loblaw sitting next to him.
“Good evening, Mr. Chetri,” Bunny greeted him politely. Her eyes drifted down to his Star Wars: A New Hope shirt.
His grin tightened as he waited for a sarcastic comment about his shirt, Star Wars, or his general nerdiness. He wondered if she was quick enough to incorporate all three. He knew Wynonna would be able to in less than a heartbeat.
“Han shot first,” she stated.
Jeremy’s face fell. Was he having a stroke? He definitely smelled toast, but he was in a diner.
“I’m sorry?” he stammered, positive he misheard.
“Han. Shot. First.” Bunny replied. “If you don’t understand that, then you are only a fair-weather fan, and you probably shouldn’t be wearing that shirt.”
Carla greeted Bunny and took her to-go order. After she left, Bunny and Jeremy fell into an in-depth analysis of George Lucas’ decision to have Han shoot first in the original film, but change it in later releases.
✨
Jeremy shook his head in disbelief, “My life changed that day, my friends. I just hadn’t realized it, yet.”
“Okay, you’re being a bit dramatic,” Waverly said, rolling her eyes slightly.
“So you and Bunny have things in common. How-“Robin cut off Gus’s question.
“There’s more.”
The group quieted so Jeremy could continue.
“We had a polite conversation that night. When my food was ready, I left and didn’t think about it again. Until…” Jeremy’s voice faded.
“Until?” Gus urged.
“I got a text on the next Saturday morning. Bunny invited me out for coffee.” Jeremy shrugged, “I assumed it was a work thing, or she wanted inside information about the Sheriff’s office, or something.”
Grinning for the first time that night, Jeremy continued, “I had this whole plan to make up stuff about a giant gnome roaming through Purgatory looking for a wife.”
“She does have an irrational fear of gnomes,” Gus added.
“It turns out, she just wanted to hang out. We meet every Saturday now. At first, we only talked about our favorite fandoms. Then, then-“ Jeremy squeezed his eyes closed.
“Then?” Nicole grew concerned, thinking back to Jeremy’s earlier statement about being gay and his groin being in love with Bunny Loblaw. “Did she force you to do something, Jeremy?”
“No, she didn’t force anything. It happened naturally.”
Waverly’s eyes grew wide, “Are you saying-“
Nodding, Jeremy said, “Yes. We became friends.”
“Friends?” Waverly questioned.
“Friends with benefits, type friends?” Nicole asked, concerned.
“Ewwww, NO, Nicole. We’re buddies. Like, hanging out on Saturdays and making plans for the midnight showing of the new Star Wars movie in the Big City next month.”
“And she isn’t forcing you to do anything?” Nicole’s question bordered on an interrogation.
“No.”
“I think I’m missing something,” Gus began, confusion evident in her voice. “She’s a Star Wars fan. How is-”
“Star Wars fan doesn’t even touch the surface,” Jeremy grumbled. “She and I have more fandoms in common than Robin and I. Star Wars, The Lord of the Rings, Harry Potter, Game of Thrones, Dune, Transformers. She has an incredible collection of both Marvel and DC comics. Plus, on the wall of her home office is a framed copy of the original 1939 Superman No. 1 comic. It was handed down from her grandfather to her father and now to her. Do you have any idea how rare that is? There are fewer than 500 in existence!” His eyes glazed over with awe, and his voice grew soft. “She showed it to me. I never thought I would actually see one, in person. It’s real, and it’s spectacular.”
“Huh”, was all Nicole could utter.
“Would not have guessed that,” Gus said, “She’s always ranting about people having weird hobbies, or having fun of any kind for that matter.”
“Right?” Robin exclaimed, “That’s exactly what I said.”
Waverly whispered, “She’s one of us. She’s a nerd.”
The group grew quiet as they mulled over everything Jeremy had confessed.
“Then your statement about your groin being in love with Bunny Loblaw meant…” Nicole prompted, hoping for a reasonable explanation, but she was pretty sure things were about to get weirder.
“After the car accident, I had to have multiple surgeries to put my hip and pelvic bones back together. I still have eight screws and three rods in me. When I get a feeling or a vision, my groin will… tingle.”
Nicole and Waverly simultaneously tilted their heads in confusion like a couple of puppies.
Jeremy continued, “I get warnings about Bunny now. At first, it was when I was near her, and only small stuff, like she was going to spill her coffee.”
“I’m really unclear as to why this is a bad thing, Jeremy. You and Bunny are friends.” Waverly elbowed her wife again when she noticed Nicole shudder. There was definitely no love lost between Nicole and Bunny.
Continuing, Waverly said, “You get these… these… alerts about people in your life. So, isn’t it natural that it would include Bunny now, too?”
“If it were only small stuff, I would agree with you, Waves.”
“But it’s no longer small stuff, is it, hon?” Robin said.
“No,” Jeremy grumbled while shaking his head.
After a few more moments of quiet, a completely frustrated Gus said, “Can we stop dancing around the point and get down to the brass tacks already?”
After a sigh so deep that it seemed to originate from the depths of Jeremy’s soul, he said, “Bunny is in danger. She’s going to hook up with a Portuguese Sailor. He'll have a heart attack, during… you know.”
Nicole grimaced and said, “Bunny in the sack is an image I will never get out of my head.”
“You’ve been hanging around with Wynonna too much, Nicole,” Gus chastised. Nicole shrugged and smirked.
Although she would never acknowledge it, Gus was thrilled that her elder niece was close friends with Nicole. The pair have each other’s backs with no questions asked. They may appear to be polar opposites, but down deep, they were two peas in a pod.
Gus was drawn from her thoughts when Waverly asked, “How does that put Bunny in danger?”
“The guy is married. His wife finds out and shows up in Purgatory. Bunny ends up with a broken nose, and her house on fire. I’ve never seen anything so clearly as that fire. Not even my mom’s death.”
“Wait! Bible-thumping Bunny Loblaw is messing around with a married man?” Nicole’s eyebrows raised almost to her hairline with glee. “The same Bunny Loblaw that spends most of her day flaunting her warped morality? Self-righteous Bunny Loblaw is not only having sex outside of marriage, but doing so with a married man? I cannot wait until Wynonna-” Waverly’s elbow to her ribs not only stopped her words, it also forced the air from her lungs.
Robin bit the inside of his cheek to keep from laughing and loudly agreeing with the redhead. Jeremy had shipped Nicole and Wynonna’s friendship as Wynaught. When Robin returned to Purgatory, he quickly became a third pea in Wynaught’s pod. Jeremy quickly named the trio Rynaught.
Trying to stay focused, Robin turned his attention to comforting his boyfriend by rubbing his back and kissing his cheek.
“I’m not sure Bunny knows he’s married.”
“How do you know he’s a Portuguese sailor? That’s oddly specific,” Waverly asked.
“I saw his wallet lying open during the fire. It showed a Portuguese identification card and a picture of him on a sailboat.”
“What did she say when you told her?” Waverly wondered.
“Told her? Have you lost your mind, Wave?”
“Yeah, I guess telling Bunny that you have a magic groin that shows the future, and it told you about her secret lover, wouldn’t exactly go over well,” Waverly mused.
“Not to mention that this lover will keel over during a romp in the sack,” Nicole added, quickly moving her arm to protect her ribs from her wife’s sharp elbow.
“Plus, he’s married, and his wife is going to break your nose and burn down your house,” Robin added.
“A giant wife-seeking gnome wandering around Purgatory would be more believable,” Gus said. Everyone mumbled their agreement.
“So what do we do?” Waverly asked.
“Nothing,” Nicole shrugged, only slightly kidding.
“Nicole. We should do something. You’re the Sheriff, and whether you like it or not, Bunny is a Purgatorian,” Waverly admonished.
“Sounds like there will be a lot of paperwork involved, Nicole said, mostly to herself, before turning to Jeremy. “Do you know when this tryst will take place?”
“Tomorrow. I don't know what time, though,” Jeremy said through a yawn.
“Do you know where?”
“I think at her house, but it’s all a little fuzzy. I can clearly see the fire. Then I see a moment from inside, including the guy’s wallet. The walls of her office were entirely covered in flames.”
“I could probably come up with a reason that I need to meet with her in the morning. I think she enjoys starting her day by telling me how disappointed she is with the Sheriff’s Department,” Nicole volunteered.
“You can’t keep her busy all day, though,” Robin replied.
“There’s not much we can do tonight. Maybe we should sleep on it and meet at the station at 8 am?” Waverly suggested.
“That’s a good idea, Waves. It will give Jeremy time to sober up,“ Robin explained.
The group looked fondly at Jeremy, who had drifted off to sleep while tucked into Robin’s shoulder.
“Gus? Will you join us?” Waverly asked softly.
“I don’t think so, honey. I’ll leave it up to you young ones,” Gus said while patting Waverly’s hand.
✨
Jeremy and Robin arrived late for the meeting, but brought cups of hot coffee for the two women as an apology. Jeremy wore dark sunglasses, doing his best to hide from a severe hangover.
Before the women could take their first sip of the hot brew, the station radio sounded with a request for medical help at Bunny’s house.
“Oh, fudge nuggets, here we go,” Waverly groaned.
“Bunny likes a sunrise smash,” Nicole joked. As she donned her stetson, she stepped out of the way of her wife’s elbow.
“Gus was right. You’ve been spending too much time with Wynonna,” Waverly huffed, before both women broke into matching grins.
“Let’s take my SUV, we need lights and sirens,” Nicole explained.
After all four slammed their car doors closed, Jeremy held his head and groaned. “Maybe lights and no sirens?”
Taking pity on her friend, she replied, “Okay, Jer, I’ll only use the siren if absolutely necessary.”
✨
Nicole parked near the ambulance as the stretcher carrying Bunny’s lover was being loaded. She went to speak with the EMTs while the other three checked on Bunny. Nicole joined the others once the ambulance departed.
“Bunny, maybe you shouldn’t stay here alone right now?”
“Waverly. I do not need a babysitter. A… a… friend was visiting. His heart gave out. That’s all,” Bunny stated firmly. Her eyes flicked to the many neighbors watching the commotion on their normally quiet street.
“Now, all of you. Please leave,” Bunny said. She turned to head back into her house when a car skidded to a stop.
A woman stormed from the driver’s seat, screaming, “Which one of you is the hussy sleeping with my husband?”
Nicole stepped forward to defuse the situation.
“Ma’am, I’m Sheriff Haught. Your husband was taken to Purgatory General. Would you like directions?”
“He’s sleeping with a cop?”
“NO!” Nicole was so shocked by the unexpected accusation that she blurted out, “I’m married.”
“So. Is. He.” she snarled.
“Well, she’s married to me,” Waverly hissed, an eyebrow raised, daring the woman to make another accusation.
The woman huffed and craned her neck to peer at Bunny.
“He’s sleeping with her, then,” she surmised as she marched toward Bunny, who was unsuccessfully hiding behind Robin.
Jeremy stood frozen, watching the chaos before his eyes. Although Robin tried to interfere, Bunny’s nose was broken from the woman’s forceful punch.
Nicole pinned the woman against her SUV, while Robin and Waverly helped Bunny. After one wrist was cuffed, the woman tossed her head back into Nicole’s face, sending the Sheriff to her knees.
Seething with anger, the woman took advantage of her momentary freedom. She snatched a gas can from her car and tossed it through Bunny’s open front door, closely followed by a lit match. Nicole radioed for backup and the fire department.
Jeremy’s groin, well past tingling, was now downright painful. “It was never about Bunny,” Jeremy mumbled with a sudden realization.
After Nicole had the woman cuffed and secured in the back of her SUV, she took a deep breath and was pleased to hear the sirens of the approaching fire trucks.
Shaking his head to clear his thoughts, Jeremy screamed, “It was never about Bunny!”
Robin and Waverly watched helplessly as Jeremy dashed into the side entrance of the burning house, with an annoyed Nicole not far behind.
When the fire trucks pulled up, the captain saw Nicole and Jeremy tumble back out the side door. He took them by their arms, half-dragging them to the truck as they coughed the dense smoke from their lungs. Waverly and Robin hugged their loved ones tightly and helped place oxygen masks over their faces.
“It was never about Bunny,” Jeremy said gleefully. He looked at the others expectantly, but with the oxygen mask on, they couldn’t understand him. He pulled down the mask and repeated himself. “It was never about Bunny.”
Holding up the frame he pulled off the wall of Bunny’s office, he said, “It was about the comic. My groin isn’t in love with Bunny. It wanted me to save Superman!”