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Terms of Service

Summary:

Original reader x android wireplay because apparently I have to do everything myself. AO3 needs more original wireplay, so here’s a fic about touching a robot’s exposed wiring and accidentally starting a series of awful choices.

You are a civic Caretaker, which mostly means you get paid to decommission old machines and feel normal about it. Saint is an illegal android hidden under a dead aquarium, damaged, beautiful, and carrying the memories of systems the city erased. He was built to make machines surrender. You were built, professionally speaking, to let them go.

Instead, you drag him home. Now you’re both on the run.

______________

“I want your hand there and your mouth on me and your breathing to keep changing because I am the one causing it,” Saint said, all in one low rush, and then he went still with visible horror at himself.

Your face burned. Your whole body burned.

“That was messy.”

“I apologize.”

“Don’t,” you said.

Notes:

There is not enough goddamn Wireplay on this damn website! I'm here to change that. Wanted to actually completely finish a work before uploading it, I'm so sorry for everyone who reads my other stuff.. and are waiting sooo patiently. Thank you. Anyway enjoy this original concept. Listened to 40+ hrs of Frutiger Aero playlists on YT while writing it.

Enjoy.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1

Notes:

Hello! The last chapter has yet to be released (oopsies, trust it's written though) I just want to make sure everything makes sense and nothing gets lost in translation. If you're here for the SMUT! It's in chapter 5 you slut.

Chapter Text

 

The city called you a Caretaker because “Decommissions Assistant” made people frown during orientation.

Your job was actually way less gentle than the current title suggested. You visited old machines, scanned their tags, confirmed they were too outdated to justify the costly repairs, and then sent them as politely as possible into the recycling stream. There were forms for this, of course, soft blue forms with rounded buttons and some very friendly confirmation sounds. The city’s maintenance app even had a little cartoon frog in the corner that winked every time you selected END SERVICE LIFE.

You hated the frog.

Tonight, the frog sent you to the old public aquarium.

According to the work order, a legacy water-quality sensor in one of the lower server levels had started sending unlicensed packets into the district mesh. It was all normal enough. Old sensors got bored, confused, spiteful, or oftentimes all three if left alone long enough. What was not normal was the compliance flag that was embedded into the bottom of the request. It was written with the kind of careful language that departments used when they wanted a problem fixed but did not want their name near the logs.

DO NOT ENGAGE WITH NONSTANDARD INTERFACE.

So here you stood, outside the aquarium’s sealed staff entrance with your scanner in one hand and a bottle of vending-machine tea in the other, re-reading the warning for the third time. Rain tapped the glass canopy overhead. The aquarium had been closed for eight years, but Aqualis never really let anything look totally abandoned, at least not to the public eye. The exterior screens still looped soft blue waves with vibrant colored fish. A faded banner near the front doors promised TOMORROW’S OCEAN, TODAY. Which was completely ironic, coming from a building with mold warnings plastered all around.

You took a sip of tea, burned your tongue, and made the reasonable, professional decision to ignore the part of your brain screaming that this was a bad idea.

“Okay,” you said to the locked staff door, “What secrets have you got for me today?”

Your badge opened the door after two failed scans and one manual override. This was already proving to be annoying. The city loved pretending everything worked smoothly right up until someone like you had to crawl behind a panel and discover the entire security system was really just being held together with expired sealant and optimism. The door slid aside with a sticky sigh, and the old aquarium breathed cold, damp air into your face.

Inside, the lobby was dark except for a few emergency strips and a wall display still playing ancient footage of tropical fish. The place smelled like salt, plastic, and old water. You paused just inside, letting your scanner map the nearest access points, but your eyes went first to the ticket kiosks lined along the wall. Their screens were black. One had a sticker peeling off its side that said PLEASE STOP ASKING FOR DIRECTIONS. 

A smaller scribble was graffitied below. IT LIES.

You smiled despite yourself.

“Good for you,” you told the kiosk quietly. “Why bother having sentience if you can’t use it for some fun every now and then.”

The scanner chirped in your hand, pulling your attention back to the work order. The signal was below you, deep in the server level, stronger than it should have been for a half-dead water sensor. You started down the staff corridor with practiced caution.

You did not mind old buildings, which had always been your problem, according to some supervisors, a wellness counselor, and Mara from down the hall when she was trying to be kind in a way that came out mean. You got sentimental about things that could not afford sentiment. You were the type to name tools, and repair machines marked for disposal. You had once spent an entire unpaid weekend coding a lobby bench’s pressure sensor to stop reporting elderly residents for “excessive loitering.” The bench had not thanked you, obviously. It was a bench. But it had stopped reporting them, and that had been enough.

Your scanner buzzed.

TARGET SIGNAL DETECTED.
ANOMALY! AUXILIARY INTERFACE REQUEST.

You stopped walking.

Water-quality sensors did not request auxiliary interfaces. They barely requested calibration. Most of them lived up to thirty obedient years, then died without making it anyone’s problem.

The scanner refreshed.

MESSAGE RECEIVED:
/please

You stared at the word for long enough that the scanner dimmed to sleep mode and had to be thumbed awake again.

You looked down the hallway toward the service elevator. Its doors stood half-open at the far end, completely dark inside, waiting with the dead patience. You should have stopped there. Filed the anomaly. Called Compliance. Then gone home to your too-small apartment and your illegal little sync bot.

Instead, you walked to the elevator.

It took your badge after a little persuasion and dropped slowly through the building. The old wall screen inside tried to play a silent aquarium safety video, all smiling employees and animated bubbles. You watched it without seeing it. Your mind kept circling the same question and finding no useful place to land.

A machine had said please.

It could have been a trap. It probably was a trap, but the please had been so small. That was what bothered you. It looked like something added after the fact, squeezed into the space between system functions.

The elevator doors opened onto the lower server level.

This part of the aquarium had never been meant for visitors. There were no glossy signs or smiling fish. Just rows of old cabinets, coolant tubes, wall panels, and floor drains that had not been cleaned by anyone in years. Your scanner picked up the signal immediately and pointed you toward the central data stack at the back of the room.

“WQ-12B?” you called, keeping your voice low. “Legacy Systems Care. I got your message.”

No response.

You stepped around the data stack.

The thing on the floor was definitely not a sensor.

For a few seconds, your brain refused to give you a useful label. The shape was humanoid, but not human. He lay folded beneath a dead ceiling panel, one arm drawn close to his chest, the other stretched across the tile as if he had tried to reach something before going still. A dark mantle covered part of his body, but it had slipped enough to reveal smooth charcoal plating, a glossy blue visor, and two narrow signal fins angled back from his head. His chest casing was cracked open just enough for gold light to show through.

Your scanner made a sound you had only heard once before, when a vending unit in Sector Three had tried to sell you a live crab.

UNREGISTERED HUMANOID INTERFACE UNIT DETECTED.
STATUS: ACTIVE / CRITICAL.
RECOMMENDED ACTION: CONTACT CIVIC COMPLIANCE IMMEDIATELY.

You did not contact Civic Compliance. You crouched beside him.

Up close, he was worse. He was beautiful, and beauty in machines usually meant someone had paid extra to make the exploitation come across as elegance. His casing was scratched but polished beneath the dust. Blue light sat faintly in the seams at his throat and wrists. The gold cabling inside his damaged chest looked delicate, arranged in branching lines like fiber-optic roots. 

A prompt flickered across the inner surface of his chest panel.

ACCEPT TERMS TO CONTINUE.

You stared at it.

Then you looked at the android’s dark visor, where one thin blue line had appeared like an eye trying to open.

“This,” you said, voice quiet in the server room, “is usually how people end up subscribed to things.”

The line on his visor brightened by a fraction, but it was not enough to be an expression.

The prompt flickered again.

ACCEPT TERMS TO CONTINUE.
POWER RESERVE: 4%

Then, beneath it, smaller:

please

Your mouth went dry.

There it was again.

You sat back on your heels and looked at him the way you were supposed to look at machines: identify the model, assess the risk, and determine the proper channel. The city had trained that into you for years. It had never stuck as well as anyone wanted, though.

“You understand me?” you asked.

His visor flickered. A faint blue circle appeared, then collapsed and became a line again.

The speaker in his throat crackled once. When his voice came, it was quiet and damaged, but clear enough to raise the hairs on your arms.

“Audio input degraded,” he said. “User present.”

You should have been relieved he sounded like a system.

“I’m not a user,” you said.

His head shifted by one millimeter toward your badge. “Caretaker present.” You looked down at your badge, then back at him.

“Caretaker,” he repeated, and this time the word did not sound like a job title.

The scanner buzzed again in your hand, still demanding Compliance. The frog icon winked from the corner of the screen as if delighted by the opportunity to ruin your life. You turned the scanner face-down on the floor.

The android’s chest prompt remained steady.

POWER RESERVE: 3%

You stared at the number. Three percent was not a lot of time. Maybe enough to call someone. Maybe enough to leave. Maybe enough to convince yourself that please was not a reason to throw away your job, your apartment, and every other illegal device hidden under your bed.

You reached for your tool belt and the android watched you.

“I need to connect emergency power,” you said, mostly because you needed to hear yourself sound professional. “If you are secretly full of malware, now would be a thoughtful time to disclose that.”

His visor shifted. “I contain only restricted systems.”

You paused with the interface lead in your hand. “That is… not the same as saying no.”

“No,” he said.

You looked at him.

He looked back, blue line faint and steady.

You found the emergency port beneath his collar plating and hesitated before plugging in. Not because you did not know what to do, but because the port was warm. His damaged chest was open under your hand and his gaze did not leave your face.

“Do I have your permission?” you asked.

The question came out before you could decide if it was ridiculous.

The android went very still.

His visor dimmed, then brightened again, slowly.

“Yes,” he said.

You connected the lead.

Blue light traveled from the port at his collar into the seams of his throat, then down into the gold structure inside his chest. His body arched off the tile with a sharp mechanical inhale. You dropped one hand to his shoulder on instinct, steadying him as his fingers spread against the floor.

“Easy,” you said, leaning over him. “You’re okay.”

His visor flared bright blue, reflecting your face back at you in curved fragments. The prompt on his chest dissolved into static, then reformed.

LOCAL INTERFACE TERMS ACCEPTED.
RECOVERY SEQUENCE INITIATED.
OVERRIDE STATUS: UNSTABLE.

Your scanner, traitor that it was, woke up beside your knee.

UNAUTHORIZED CONNECTION DETECTED.
REPORT QUEUED.
TIME UNTIL TRANSMISSION: 09:59

The frog winked.

You closed your eyes for half a second. “Of course,” you said.

The android’s head turned toward the scanner. His visor narrowed to a thin, focused line.

“Report queued,” he said.

“Yes,” you said, yanking the scanner up and killing the audio warning before it could start singing at you. “Thank you. I also have eyes,” You paused then added, “and now a deepening sense of regret.”

“Regret indicates that you understood risk before acting.”

That was an unsettlingly thoughtful thing for some unidentifiable bot at three percent power to say.

You looked back at him with furrowed brows. “Are you comforting me or analyzing me?”

A pause.

“I do not know yet,” he said. Okay, weird.

The countdown continued on your scanner.

09:42

You pulled the emergency lead free, then immediately regretted the loss of charge when his chest light dipped. “Can you stand?”

The android considered this with visible seriousness, as if checking with every part of himself individually. His right hand pressed to the floor. His left leg shifted, then locked with a soft, unhealthy click.

“Yes,” he said.

You waited.

“In part,” he added.

“Great,” you said, already sliding an arm under his mantle. 

He was heavier than he looked. His arm came around your shoulders with careful precision, though it took him a second to understand how much weight he could put on you. When he tried too little, he nearly fell. When he tried more, you grunted and adjusted your stance.

“I may injure you,” he said.

“You may also be disassembled by Compliance,” you said, dragging him toward the elevator one step at a time. “Let’s rank problems here.”

He looked down at you. The angle of his visor made his expression impossible to read, but his voice was quieter when he spoke again. 

“You chose not to call them. Why?”

You almost snapped back something useless. Because you said please. Because I’m stupid. Because I have a long history of caring about the wrong things. Instead, you tightened your grip under his arm and kept moving.

“Because I’m the Caretaker,” you said finally, and immediately hated how true it sounded.

The android was silent for several steps.

Then he said, “Caretaker is insufficient.”

You looked up at him, breathing hard. “Excuse me?”

“You initiated recovery. You accepted liability.” His voice was still damaged, still soft, but there was a strange certainty gathering inside it. “Caretaker is a municipal designation. It describes your assigned function, not your role in relation to me.”

“This is not a good time for a vocabulary dispute.” You breathlessly began to argue back, but then decided not to try to argue proper vernacular with a dying robot.

“Agreed,” he said. 

The elevator waited at the end of the corridor, doors open.

You shifted his weight higher on your shoulder. “Fine. What would you call me?”

His visor turned toward you fully.

“Operator,” he said.

The word was too intimate for something so technical. It should have sounded cold. Instead, in his broken voice, it sounded like he had selected you from a list of possible meanings and found the only one that fit.

You stared at him for half a second too long.

Then the scanner buzzed in your pocket.

09:00

You dragged him into the elevator.

“Absolutely not,” you said.

He had not told you his name yet. He had barely told you anything.

But the android’s visor warmed by one quiet degree, and he said, as the elevator doors closed, “Correction refused.”

 

-----

 

The elevator doors closed with the kind of slow, grinding patience that made you want to kick them.

The android leaned against you in silence for the first few seconds. Not limp, exactly, but not steady either. His weight shifted in careful increments, like he was learning how much of himself was still available. One hand rested against the wall rail. The other remained around your shoulders, cold at the fingertips and warm near the joints. His chest light flickered under the edge of his mantle every time the elevator shuddered.

You watched the scanner countdown in your hand.

08:47

“Can you stop the report?” you asked, trying to pry the back panel off the scanner with your thumbnail. 

The android turned his visor toward the device. “The report is queued locally. Transmission requires a district uplink.”

You looked at him. “So that sounds like a yes, but with extra steps.”

“It is a possible yes,” he said. “Though not a guaranteed one.”

“Great. We love a possible yes.”

He did not answer that. He only watched as you dug a flat tool from your belt and jammed it beneath the scanner casing. It was not like being watched by a person, but it was not like being watched by a camera either. He seemed to be taking you in piece by scrutinizing piece.

“You are efficient under pressure,” he said finally.

You popped one screw loose and almost lost it down the elevator grate. “I am mostly spiteful under pressure. Efficiency is just like, a side effect.”

He considered this like it was a useful technical note.

The elevator jolted. His arm tightened around your shoulders before he seemed to notice himself doing it. Then he loosened his grip by one careful degree.

“Did I injure you?” he asked.

“No,” you said, too quickly, because the truth was that it had not hurt at all, if anything, he had steadied you. “You’re fine. Just try not to crush me before I finish committing scanner surgery.”

The back panel came free and you found the uplink wafer, glossy and small, tucked behind a strip of manufacturer sealant. You scraped the edge loose, popped the wafer out, and looked around for somewhere to put it.

The android watched you drop it into your tea bottle.

The scanner screen flashed.

UPLINK LOST. REPORT HELD.

You stared at the message for half a second, then exhaled so hard your shoulders dipped. “Okay. That buys us time.”

“Not safety,” he quipped.

You glanced up at him. “Is this something you usually do?”

“What?” he asked.

“Think you’re improving a situation by immediately explaining how it’s still bad.”

His visor stayed fixed on you. “Yes.”

That startled a laugh out of you before you could stop it, his response was so serious for the absurdity of the situation you both found yourselves in. ‘Of your own doing,’ you reminded yourself. God.. why did you have such a soft spot for dying machinery?

The elevator reached the lobby with a tired chime and opened onto the dark aquarium entrance. Nothing had visibly changed. The fish still swam across the wall display and the rain still blurred the glass doors at the front.

For one bright, stupid second, you thought you might just walk out.

Then the front doors locked.

A pleasant tone sounded overhead, followed by a scripted automated voice.

Dear visitors, this facility is temporarily paused for your safety. Please remain calm while assistance is contacted.

You looked at the ceiling. “You have got to be kidding me.”

The android’s head angled toward the lobby cameras. “The building must have noticed a lost uplink.”

“You mean the building tattled.” You sighed.

“Yes.” He shifted his weight off you enough to stand almost independently, though his left leg still made a soft clicking sound that you did not like. “There will be alternate exits.”

“There should be,” you said, already moving toward the nearest kiosk. “Public buildings love having evacuation routes almost as much as they love blocking them during emergencies.”

You slapped your badge against the kiosk. For one second, nothing happened. Then the dead screen blinked awake, showed a loading icon shaped like a smiling turtle, and opened an old visitor map. Most of the exits were marked in gray. A staff loading dock blinked at the far end of the building, past the exhibit corridors and service storage.

The android leaned closer to look. His visor reflected the map in thin blue lines.

You became very aware that he was close enough for his shoulder to brush yours.

“There,” you said, pointing. “Loading dock. It might still have a manual release.”

“It will have cameras.”

“I assumed.”

“I can misdirect some of them.”

You looked at him. “Some?”

“My current processing capacity is limited.”

“Right. Three percent, almost forgot.”

His visor shifted toward you. “I am at six percent now.”

“Oh, well, in that case.”

He did not smile. He did not have a mouth for it. But something in the line of his visor softened in a way that felt suspiciously close.

You looked away first.

The route to the loading dock took you through one of the exhibit tunnels. The ceiling above had once held water, or simulated water, but now it was mostly empty acrylic and dust. Blue light moved over the walls and across the android’s dark shell in slow waves, making the gold inside his chest flash through the gaps in his mantle.

He kept pace better than you expected. His left leg still dragged sometimes, and every fourth or fifth step, his hand found the wall for balance. But he was learning himself quickly. Too quickly, maybe. You kept catching the tiny adjustments he’d make.

“You are staring,” he said after the third time you glanced down at his leg.

“I’m checking to see if you’re about to fall.”

“That is staring, only you have a purpose behind it.”

“Well,” You chuffed, “Most staring has a purpose.”

“No,” he said. “Some staring is useless.”

You looked over at him, surprised by the certainty in his voice. “Do you… have opinions about staring?”

“I was displayed often.”

That made you slow without really meaning to. The tunnel lights rippled over his visor. For a moment, the strange humor of him fell away.

“Displayed where?” you asked.

“Public demonstrations. Negotiation labs. Private investor visits.” He said it evenly, but the evenness did not make it come off as just a neutral fact. To be sentient enough to form opinions.. Or even comment on this stuff was- the crackle of his voicebox interrupted your thoughts.

“Often, humans stared when they were deciding whether I looked trustworthy enough.”

You did not know what to say to that, thankfully you had a moment to collect your thoughts as a camera dome shifted above you. The android lifted two fingers toward it, the camera stopped moving, then turned away.

You waited until you were past it before speaking again. “Is that what you were built for? Looking trustworthy?”

“In part,” he said. His voice had gone distant. “I was built to make other systems surrender.”

You glanced at him, but he was looking ahead now, visor narrowed toward the loading dock sign at the end of the corridor.

“What does that mean?” you asked.

He did not answer right away. The delay didn’t come off to you as confusion, it felt more like precise selection. Like he had several different answers.

“It means I was successful at conversations with other machines, ones that they did not want to have,” he said. Ah, it started to click with you, he must be some kind of negotiation robot, it would explain why his model was so good at conversation. Suppose you have to have a personality for difficult things like that. 

It was not any less comforting.

The loading dock door sat behind a staff-only panel with a red lockdown light glowing above it. You crouched in front of the access plate, shoved your scanner into your pocket, and pried the cover loose. Behind it was old wiring, a manual release, and a safety guard that had fused halfway shut.

Behind you, down the corridor, something heavy clicked.

You looked back and noticed the android had turned before you did. His body shifted between you and the corridor without being asked just as a security drone rounded the corner, white casing glossy under the exhibit lights. Its camera focused on him first, then on you.

A voice came from the drone, calm and flat. “Unauthorized humanoid detected. Caretaker, step away from this machine.”

You stayed crouched at the panel, one hand frozen around the wires.

“Machine,” he repeated, almost like he was testing the word.

The drone advanced. “Asset is marked for containment. Caretaker, step away.”

Your fingers started moving again because stopping would not help either of you. The manual release was simple, just stiff and badly placed. You needed maybe thirty seconds. You had maybe ten.

The android raised his right hand.

Every display in the corridor woke at once.

It was not explosive, at first. The screens blinked on one by one, old exhibit footage flooding the tunnel in sudden blue and green light. They flashed with coral images, donation menus, safety videos and birthday announcements from probably eight years ago. Then the images doubled, smeared, glitched, and poured themselves across every wall display at once.

The drone jerked sideways, its camera overwhelmed.

The android staggered.

You slammed the manual release down and the loading dock door clanged open.

You stood fast enough to make your knees protest and grabbed his wrist. “Move.”

He came with you, but not before the drone recovered enough to launch a restraint tether. It snapped past your shoulder and hit the door frame, sparking. You pulled him through the opening and hit the close control with your elbow. The door lurched down between you and the corridor, metal grinding against metal until it caught halfway.

The drone hit the gap hard enough to dent the frame.

You did not wait to see whether it could squeeze through.

The loading dock opened into a service alley behind the aquarium. Rain fell hard here, turning the ground silver under the glow of a nearby greenhouse tower. A small delivery cart sat charging beneath an overhang, its cargo bed empty except for a few plastic crates.

You looked at the cart.

The android looked at you.

“No,” he said.

“You don’t even know what I’m thinking.”

“You are looking at the cart, I can estimate this is your escape strategy.”

“It is an escape strategy.” You couldn’t help but grin.

“It is not rated for humanoid transport.”

“You are legally not supposed to exist, so let’s not get picky about ratings.”

He stood there in the rain, glowing faintly through his damaged mantle, and for one absurd second he seemed genuinely offended by the cart. Then something slammed against the half-shut loading dock door behind you.

You pointed at the cart. “In.”

“Operator,” he said, and the name caught you off guard even through the panic. “This is undignified.”

You balked at him. “You have been awake for like ten minutes and already you care about dignity?”

“Yes.”

The loading dock door buckled.

“In,” you repeated.

He got in.

Not gracefully. Not even close. His long limbs folded badly, his mantle caught on one of the crates, and for a second his signal fins knocked against the cart’s side rail. You climbed onto the rear step, slapped your badge against the cart’s panel, and typed the only destination you could think of.

AQUA HEIGHTS, SERVICE BLOCK.

The cart chirped.

DELIVERY ROUTE ACCEPTED. PLEASE SECURE CARGO.

The android turned his visor toward you.

“Do not say anything,” he warned.

You sniggered, totally giddy off committing crime and somehow getting away with it. “You’re cargo.”

This was, without a doubt, one bad decision after the next, but there was just something about this android that intrigued you. 

He considered that as the cart rolled out from under the overhang and into the service lane. Rain hit your face, cold and sharp. You held the side rail with one hand and kept the other pressed over the cracked edge of his chest panel to stop it from rattling apart. Beneath your palm, his gold cabling pulsed once.

He went still.

You felt it, even through the motion of the cart.

“Did I hurt you?” you asked, loosening your hand immediately.

“No,” he said. His voice sounded different. Quieter. “I think contact is starting to register.”

You looked down at him.

His visor was turned toward your hand, not your face. The blue light had softened, but the gold inside his chest was brighter where your palm hovered above it.

You should have pulled away completely.

“What does that mean?” you asked.

“I do not know yet,” he said, and then, after a pause, “Do not remove your hand if it is necessary for structural support.”

“It is,” you said.

That was mostly true.

The cart took a corner too fast. You shifted your weight, bracing yourself, and your hand pressed more firmly against his chest. The android’s fingers closed around the edge of the cargo bed. His visor flared for half a second, bright blue in the rain.

You looked away before he could catch you staring.

Above you, Aqualis rose in clean towers and wet glass, all soft lights and indoor gardens and public screens pretending nothing bad ever happened after midnight. Behind you, the aquarium alarms finally began to ring, muted by distance and rain. Somewhere in the city’s system, a report was held but not gone. Somewhere, Compliance would begin putting the pieces together.

The android also watched the city pass.

He seemed older in the open air. Stranger. The glossy buildings reflected in his visor, but he did not look like he belonged to them. Not anymore, if he even ever had.

“You are taking me to your residence?” he said more than asked.

“Yes.”

“This increases your risk of being discovered.”

“I had gathered.”

“You could abandon me at a lower service junction. It would reduce your trace exposure.”

You looked down at him, annoyed by how calmly he said it. “Can you walk?”

A pause. “Not reliably.”

“Can you hide?”

“No.”

“Then I’m taking you home.”

He was silent for a moment. Rain streaked across his visor and broke the city lights into thin blue lines.

“Why?” he asked again, but this time the word was different.

You kept your hand over his chest and watched the road ahead.

Honestly, you had already chosen. Maybe it was because he had asked permission, or asked for help in the first place.

Either way, you answered, “Because,” you said, tightening your grip on the cart rail as it sped into the service lane, “you’re not getting taken apart tonight.”