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James was the youngest out of the three.
Even the youngest in the 00’ program.
Cress and Monroe were both twenty-eight, born in 1998. James was born in 2000, practically a baby.
“The younger ones have to do what the older ones say, that's law”, Monroe said and pointed to the dirty dishes on the table, “So yes, you have to clean.”
James gave Monroe a look, “It's such a low move to pull, Monroe. It should be the other way around, if I'm such a baby you should take care of me”, he pointed at Cress, “both of you should.”
Cress raised an eyebrow, “Should we?”, she flashed Monroe a short glance, their gaze met, and he looked amused.
James grinned, “If I'm such a baby to you, absolutely.”
“Don’t get over your head, pretty boy”, Cress said and threw James a dish towel, “clean up. If you do it nicely, you can pick which movie we're watching today.”
James caught the towel and narrowed his eyes, “Is this some kind of a trick?”
“No”, Cress said lightly, picking up her plate, “you can choose.”
Cress and Monroe never let James choose what to watch, his movie taste was… special. They always pulled the elderly card on this one.
James looked over to Monroe and then to Cress again, slowly picking up a glass, not breaking eye contact with Cress, “If that's a lie, you’ll both be dead by morning.”
Monroe threw an arm around James' shoulders and pulled him against his side, speaking directly into James’ ear, “Yeah sure, killed by an infant.”
Monroe was on his back in a blink. James smirked, “Such a pity the old man was fucked over by a baby.”
It was always impressing how good James really was in combat. He went eye to eye with Monroe, no doubt. She would've never expected it. But James was too cocky for his own good.
Monroe raised his arm and already opened his mouth when Cress cut in, her voice commanding, “Could we clean this up now? I want to watch a movie and then go to bed.”
James let go of Monroe instantly, he looked at Cress, blue eyes reflecting the artificial kitchen light, “Yes, ma’am.”
It amazed Cress how good James could be in following orders, as if he was looking for guidance, but also pushing the boundaries.
Like a child.
-
They had watched a crappy B-movie. It had its moments, Cress must admit, but overall it had been trashy and boring. Monroe said it was mediocre and he wouldn't watch it again, and James said it was a funny dumb movie (dumb was the right word to describe this movie).
Then they went to bed, or rather, James went to bed and Monroe had sneaked into Cress' room, fucking her from behind against the bedrest. Now they lay next to each other in her bed, Cress had a cigarette in her hand, smoke curled through the room and out of the open window, a bad habit of hers, yes, but she just couldn't quit (or hadn't tried hard enough). She didn't smoke in front of James, he had complained about it, how much he despised the smell.
It had been kinda cute though, he was, after all, such a baby sometimes.
“Cress.”
She turned her head to Monroe, cigarette between her fingers, “I wanted to ask you something”, Monroe said, he lay on his side, facing her directly.
“Yes?”, Cress said, dragging on her cigarette, blowing the smoke in the opposite direction.
“Do you have a crush on him?”
Cress dragged on the cigarette again, face blank. Interesting question. But actually, she could ask the same.
“Do you?”, she asked.
Monroe raised his arm and pulled the cigarette out of her fingers, putting it between his lips, dragging on it. At least she didn't share her bad habit alone.
“I asked you first”, Monroe said, but smiled slightly.
They both knew the answer already.
Cress rolled onto her stomach, elbows peeking in the soft mattress, head resting on her hands and looked at Monroe, “Who doesn't?”
Cress was very certain that everyone who met James did have a crush on him. He was charismatic, open, and good-looking, everyone had to be head over heels for him.
“Yeah right”, Monroe said, dragging on the cigarette, “everyone must be in love with James.”
But they both knew it wasn't this version of James they learned to adore.
“He's cute”, Cress said, “and so young”, she gave Monroe a wink, and he rolled his eyes.
-
Cress knew James had grown up in an orphanage, his parents had died when he had been a child, he had no family. Not like her or Monroe, their families were always eager to know what they were up to.
James didn't talk much about his childhood or teenage years, he had only let slip that he had been a troubled child and teen, no one had ever wanted to adopt him. He had told it with a smirk, but Cress had seen the short glance to the side, the short affirmation that he actually didn’t want to look her in the eyes, didn't like to talk about it.
James had been an only child, growing up without any siblings or parents, this must leave a mark and Cress already had an idea where to look.
When James came home, Cress was alone, she sat on the couch in the living room, watching TV. Monroe was not at home, he was out meeting some friends outside of MI6. Cress looked up from the TV, watching James come through the doorway, he hadn’t been home since yesterday evening, so she could figure what he had been up to.
James' hair was messy and his cheeks were slightly flushed from the cold, like this he looked even younger than he actually was.
Cress grabbed the remote and turned the volume off, “The lost son returns”, she turned around, facing James, “We were already worried.”
This was a bit true, of course, Monroe and she were well aware James could watch out for himself, but a note or message about where he had gone off to would’ve been nice.
James let himself fall onto the couch, body melting into the pillows, he scoffed, “As if.”
“Is it so unbelievable we’re worried about you?”, Cress asked, watching James closely, he looked tired.
James shrugged, “I don’t know.”
Not cheeky today? Odd. Cress needed to investigate.
“Where were you anyway?”
“Out”, James cut short.
Okay, James was not in a good mood. Something must’ve happened.
“Can you be more specific?”
James looked at Cress, he had light circles under his eyes, underlining her assumption, “Met someone.”
“Who?”
“Don’t know the name”, James answered and his gaze wandered to the TV, the moving pictures were reflecting in his eyes, “and I don’t care.”
“Why did you meet?”
James glanced over to her, giving her an are you serious? look, but answered anyway, “To fuck?”
Cress knew that, because of course she knew, James was not innocent. But she had never seen him with the same woman twice. Apparently James liked to fuck, but didn’t like to commit.
“Was it that bad?”
James sighed, looking at the TV again, “You can put it like that.”
“Hmh”, Cress said. They sat together in silence for a while. Cress was watching James and James was watching the TV.
Then, after a couple of minutes, James said, “She said I’m childish.”
Oh.
Cress would’ve expected anything, but not… this.
“Why’s that?”
“I… don’t know”, James said, still staring at the TV, “She said she expected me to be… older.”
“I see”, Cress said, didn’t ask if James was talking about his physical or mental age. James could act older than he actually was, that was always his advantage, but if someone had a good knowledge of human nature, they could see what James was actually looking for.
And the woman apparently had a good knowledge of human nature.
Cress had a guess, she wanted confirmation.
“James, look at me.”
James immediately looked at her, his pupils were blown against the darkness, swallowing the blue.
Cress leaned forward, raising one hand to smooth through James' hair, “Come closer.”
James blinked slowly, then leaned in, breathing the same air.
“Kiss me”, Cress said, voice low but firm.
James' gaze shot sideways and then back to her, he looked confused.
“Monroe has no problem with it”, Cress reassured, stroking through his hair, “Kiss me.”
And James kissed her without hesitation.
-
“You've to be kidding me”, Monroe said, sitting up on the couch, “James kissed you?”, he pointed at the cushion, “Here?”
“Yes”, Cress said, smile so big it split her face, “Yes, Monroe, he did, he did kiss me.”
“Unbelievable”, Monroe let himself fall back against the pillows, “and I wasn't there.”
Cress clicked with her tongue, “I’m pretty certain he wouldn't have kissed me if you had been there.”
Monroe sighed, “Yeah, probably.”
James had another relationship with Cress than with Monroe, Monroe was another man, he was James' best buddy friend. James wouldn't let himself go this easily with another male around, Cress was sure of it. They had to work on this.
“How was it though?”, Monroe asked, he sounded genuinely curious.
“Hmm”, Cress tapped against her chin, thinking, “It was cute. The kiss was kinda shy for his standards, I suppose.”
“How's that?”
“We just kissed, you know”, she leaned forward, “like this”, and kissed Monroe shortly on the mouth, her lips were closed. Monroe’s lips were warm and soft, not hot and dry like James’. She pulled back, blinking at Monroe.
“That’s it?”, Monroe asked, he looked confused, “You both didn’t do more?”
Cress shook her head, “No, I think he was kinda suppressed because he had a guilty conscience.”
Monroe frowned. Before he could say something, Cress said: “Because of you, idiot.”
“Of me?”, Monroe asked, now looking and sounding confused.
Cress gave him a look, “Of course, Lennox, oh my god, he sees you as his best buddy and he’s not dumb, he knows we date and fuck.”
Sometimes Cress didn’t know how Monroe passed the psychological test, his knowledge of human nature was lacking in some areas (maybe because he was a man).
Monroe scratched his neck, “Yeah, okay, you’re right. But I’ve no problem with it, I would kiss him myself.”
Cress tilted her head, “James doesn’t know that.”
Actually, it should be obvious what they should do now.
-
James loved to wrestle with Monroe (he was very good at it too). Cress was sure that sometimes James provoked Monroe on purpose just because he liked to challenge the other man.
It was not only in combat he challenged Monroe or her. He constantly did, he liked to be mouthy and test their patience with him. Cress had thought it would tone down a bit if they started living together, sometimes it did, but sometimes it even got worse.
But Cress was good with people and Monroe had two younger siblings, so they could manage.
“That’s bullshit”, James said, throwing his jacket on the couch, “That’s bullshit. Why do I have to be the chauffeur? That’s what I’m saying, Greenway hates me.”
Cress looked over the rim of her book, Monroe sat next to her on the couch, doom-scrolling on his phone. James had come home a couple of hours after them, being absolutely pissed about the job he got.
In the Q lab he had already been frustrated but nothing serious, he had just seemed a bit unhappy. It should’ve been obvious the topic wasn’t off the table. On the other hand, Cress was kinda surprised James showed his frustration this openly, he hadn’t done that a few weeks before. Interesting.
“He doesn’t hate you, James”, Cress said, giving her voice a calming edge.
“That’s easy to say for someone who has practically the main role”, James said, he sounded genuinely upset, “I’ll just bore myself to death in the fucking parking lot.”
“You’ll be given the main role next mission, I’m sure”, Monroe said, looking up from his phone, “Greenway can’t deny you’re good. Everyone knows.”
Monroe probably stroked James' ego a bit too much there, but whatever, James needed it right now.
“I am good”, James said, flopping down on the armchair across from them, now sulking, “That’s just unfair.”
Cress suppressed an eye roll, “James”, she put her book down, “Stop complaining, the driver is still an important job. Don’t act like a spoiled child.”
James' face went neutral the moment she had finished the sentence. Frustration and anger vanished in an instant.
Only now Cress realized what she had just said. Shit.
“You’re right”, James said, no emotion showed on his face, he smirked slightly, “My mistake.”
“James”, Cress said, practically seeing the defensive walls coming up around James' soul, “I didn’t mean it like that.”
“No need to apologize, Cress”, James said casually and stood up, “I get it.”
“James”, Monroe said, also standing up, picking up the mood swing immediately, “You know it wasn’t meant like that.”
“It’s alright”, James said again, picking up his jacket from the couch, looking down at Cress and then up to Monroe, “Like I said, I get it”, he turned around to the door, “I’ll be out this evening, don’t wait for me.”
“James—”, Cress said again, but James was already at the door and out of the flat.
Cress fell back against the pillows, she messed up, “Fuck.”
-
“Cress, he’s still an adult”, Monroe said, both sitting at the dining table, eating Indian takeout, “Even if we see him like a little brother, he’s still an adult. He managed to come this far in life, he’ll get over it and come back.”
Cress shook her head, she rarely felt guilt, but now she felt guilty, “I shouldn’t have said that, I know how sensitive this topic is for him, I shouldn’t have.”
“Cress”, Monroe took her hand and squeezed it, “We tease James all the time about him being a baby, he’ll get over it.”
“But it wasn’t teasing”, Cress said, putting her fork down, “and he knows it.”
“We’ll talk to him when he comes back”, Monroe said, searching her eyes, “It’ll be fine, Cress.”
Cress exhaled, “He trusts us, Monroe, he sees us as someone he can rely on. We’re the people he can be himself with, not this”, she gestured in the air to show her frustration, “a few weeks ago we would’ve never seen him being more emotional than making a snarky comment. He challenges us all the time, this was a challenge and we failed”, she looked at her plate, “I failed.”
Monroe squeezed her hand again, “We’ll make up for it.”
Cress smiled sadly, “We have to.”
-
It was the middle of the night when Cress woke up. She squinted against the moonlight, confused about what woke her up. She lay in Monroe’s bed, Monroe lay next to her on his stomach, breathing quietly. She frowned, why did she wake up?
A heavy blow echoed in the room and then someone giggled, a woman, someone spoke to her, a man.
James.
Suddenly Cress was awake. James had come back. Something slung around her heart, a bad feeling. Something was not right, she could feel it. Something felt off.
Cress sat up in the bed, swinging her legs over the edge, the floor was cold. She needed to see if everything was alright.
“What are you doing?”, Monroe asked behind her, voice rough from sleep, touching her back, “Cress, what happened?”
She turned around, looking at Monroe and touched his fingers on her back, “James is back, I want to take a look if he’s alright.”
The high giggling was audible again, something fell on the floor.
Monroe gave her a tired look, “Cress, I don’t think now is a good time.”
“You don’t have to come with me”, Cress said, standing up, Monroe's hand slipping onto the bedsheets, “But I need to know if James is alright.”
“Apparently he’s fucking someone in the living room, I’m sure he’s alright”, Monroe said and sighed, “Let him be, Cress, we’ll talk tomorrow.”
“No”, Cress said, slipping into her pants, “No, I need to know if he’s alright.”
Something felt off, she needed to know now. She needed to see James. Needed to know if everything was alright.
“He’ll be more pissed”, Monroe said.
“He won’t see me”, Cress said, right hand already on the door handle.
“Cress -”
“I’ve got a bad feeling, Lennox”, Cress said, looking back at Monroe, “I’ve got a bad feeling, I can’t explain it, something is off.”
Monroe’s eyes immediately cleared, “You sure?”
“Yes.”
Cress pushed the handle down, quietly opened the door, the floor was only lit by the lamp in the living room, making it difficult to see. Cress walked on the wooden floor, her bare feet making no sound, she could feel Monroe behind her, he made no sound.
She heard clothes rustling in the living room and quiet moaning, Cress looked behind her, Monroe nodded at the living room, then he pointed at himself and then at the spot he was standing on.
Cress nodded back and sneaked to the living room, pressing her back against the wall in the shadows and looked inside.
A woman sat on the couch, her red dress was pushed up, James sat in front of her, topless, her legs over his shoulder, the woman had grabbed James’ hair and pushed his face between her legs. Goosebumps spread over Cress’ body, seeing James giving head gave her some kind of kick.
James' back muscles moved under the skin, flexing in the dim light.
“Such a good boy”, the woman sighed, digging her heel into James' back, pushing him even closer, her head fell back and only now Cress realised that the woman must be roughly 10 years older than James.
Holy shit.
Suddenly the woman pulled James’ head up, smiling, “You did so good, you want some?”
James looked up at her, without hesitation he opened his mouth, the woman smiled widely and pulled a little box out of the neckline of her dress, opening it and taking out a pill, “Good boy”, she coaxed and put the pill on James’ tongue.
Ecstasy? Maybe.
James swallowed, Cress couldn’t see his face, but she was sure James was smiling, his voice sounded smooth when he said: “Always happy to satisfy.”
He lowered his head again, gripping the waist of the woman and pushed her against his mouth, the woman moaned and roughly tugged at James’ hair, “Such a well-mannered boy.”
That was enough.
Cress pulled back, staring at the wall across from her, her heart hammered in her chest. She felt so bad it hurt.
-
Two days before their first real mission, they went out. Only Cress, Monroe and James.
Cress wanted to make it up to James, wanted to show James how much Monroe and she adored him, so it was only them going out. It was a private matter.
They decided to go clubbing, dancing and drinking, distracting themselves. The moment they had walked into the high-society club, James had waved a waiter over, taking a glass of champagne from their tray and drowning it in one go.
Monroe and she had only shared a look.
James didn't act much differently around them since they had argued three days ago, but he didn't let himself go again, not allowing Cress or Monroe a glance inside his feelings. He had carefully locked this side away again.
Cress knew they had slipped up and they only had one chance to fix their mistake, and they needed to fix the mistake soon or James, the real and vulnerable James, would drift away forever.
It was today or never.
“I’m gonna fetch a drink”, James said, he nodded at the bar on the other side of the dance floor, “Will be back.”
Then he vanished into the crowd, he only wore a plain white shirt and black trousers, melting together with hundreds of other people who had the same fashion idea as him.
Monroe looked at Cress, “You sure about this? Going all in?”
Cress nodded, she was sure, no turning back now, “It's now or never.”
“It is”, Monroe said, taking her hand and squeezing it, “I trust us.”
Cress smiled up at him, stood up on her tiptoes and gave Monroe a kiss, she would never regret asking him out on a date.
Then they danced on the dance floor and drank cocktails, until James came back, urging Monroe to show him something and Monroe let himself get dragged away. Cress was alone on the dance floor, moving her body in the rhythm of the music, not putting much effort into it. It was kinda boring dancing alone among strangers.
A few minutes later James came back, Monroe wasn’t with him.
James grinned at Cress, “You don't wanna dance?”
He stood in front of her, his eyes reflected the light of the club and he slightly smelled of alcohol, his hair was messy. They stood across from each other on the dance floor, James was tipsy, Cress was not.
“I’m not good at dancing”, Cress said, voice raised against the loud music. This was her chance.
“Pff”, James grabbed her hand and pulled her against his chest, “that’s bullshit, I’m sure you dance like a goddess."
Okay, maybe James was a little more than just tipsy.
Cress laughed, happiness spreading in her chest, she could feel the connection between them, “If you say so, maybe Monroe should dance too.”
“Already danced with him”, James said and grabbed her waist, moving her in rhythm to the music, “He’s good at dancing.”
Ah, that explained what they both did while being away. Cress laughed again, Monroe was awful at dancing, but cute of James to think otherwise.
James was slightly taller than her, so he had to look down, he smiled and his eyes gleamed. Cress still had the connection, she could make it alright again. She threw her hand around James’ shoulders, looking up at him, fixating him with her eyes, “You’re not bad at dancing yourself”, Cress said, one hand coming up, stroking through James’ hair at the back of his head.
James' mouth twitched, a crooked smile, “Thanks, ma’am.”
Her chance.
Cress pressed her body against James’, relaxing in his grip, she could feel his heat through her thin dress, “You’re very good at dancing”, she smiled up at him, “Such a good dancer.”
She would make it up, she could show James how much she adored him. How much they both adored him for who he really was.
James traced her face as if he was searching for something, didn’t answer.
“A good dancer and”, she tilted her head, pushing James closer, speaking into his ear, “a good boy.”
James' fingers around her waist twitched, when she drew back, James' pupils were blown out and his eyes round. He looked like someone had punched the air out of his lungs.
“You’re our good boy, James.”
Because James was. He was their good boy, they would do anything to make him happy, he was their baby after all.
“Kiss me”, Cress said and James kissed her, his arms moved up, surrounding her torso, hugging her tightly. He really kissed her this time, mouth moving against hers.
Cress closed her eyes, letting herself fall into the feeling, the feeling of satisfaction and connection, James was theirs to care for, to teach, to protect. They had known it the moment Greenway had put James under their wing.
“Why are you always kissing Cress?”, someone asked. Monroe asked. Cress broke the kiss and turned her head, looking at Monroe, he stood beside them, pinning James under his eyes, James looked at Cress, then back to Monroe and then back to Cress.
He didn’t know what to say, he asked Cress. Searching for her guidance again, giving her the trust to let her guide him, to let himself fall into a need only others could satisfy, he gave Cress and Monroe a chance.
“Do you wanna kiss Monroe?”, Cress said, tugging at James' hair, “You can kiss him, I would love to see it.”
James looked up at Monroe, eyes blinking slowly, he didn’t move his hands from Cress’ waist. He seemed frozen.
“I suppose you’ve never kissed a man before”, Monroe said and tilted his head, “That’s alright, I can show you.”
James' gaze shortly darted to Cress, then to the opposite side, then back to Monroe and eventually he nodded.
Monroe smiled at him and leaned down, their lips met and James' hands tightened around Cress’ waist.
James had his eyes closed while kissing Monroe, his hair stood up on all sides and the tight shirt hugged his upper arm tightly, underlining the muscles there.
James was pretty, he was so damn pretty and he was theirs. He didn't belong to strangers who fucked him once and could never fill the hole in his chest.
But Monroe and Cress could and they would, James never had to fuck with strangers again to feel seen.
-
Cress and Monroe had talked about what they would do with James. How they would treat him, how they would fuck him, they had talked about it and still nothing had prepared Cress for how special James was.
They had gone home, it was after midnight and James lay in her bed, he was naked under her, looking up, glancing over her pubic bone while licking into her.
His hands were twisted into the sheets, his knuckles white, she could feel his chest moving, he moaned against her, it was so quiet Cress could only pick up the rumbling in his throat. He was generally very silent during sex, something she hadn't expected.
James squeezed his eyes shut under her, losing his rhythm in giving head, panting against her, “Stop”, Cress said, reaching behind her, touching Monroe's shoulder, looking at him, “He’s close.”
Monroe looked up, James' cock falling out of his mouth, spit glittered in the dim light. Monroe smirked, “You're kidding, already?”
Cress turned her head around again, looking down at James, his cheeks were flushed, he breathed heavily and the sweat was damp on his skin.
“Yeah, cute isn't it?”, Cress said, right hand ruffling through James' hair, “After all, he's the youngest.”
James looked away, embarrassed, unsure.
“It's alright”, Cress said, giving him a kiss on the forehead, “Nothing to be ashamed of, we see it as a compliment”, she leaned back and winked at him.
“Did you like it?”, Monroe asked, looking over Cress’ shoulder.
James' eyes moved back to them, giving them a look, “What do you think?”
“Right”, Monroe chuckled, “Stupid question.”
Cress smoothed her hand down from James' head to his cheek, touching the short stubble, “Cute.”
James' entire face turned red, he looked away again.
“Should we fuck you?”, Cress asked, tilting her head, thumb pressing into James’ bottom lip, “Would you like that?”
James swallowed, Adam's apple moving under the skin.
“Let us fuck you, we’ll make it up to you”, Cress said, moving away from James’ face, she lay next to him, head on the pillow and gestured for James to roll over.
Slowly James sat up, crawling to her, settling between her legs and moved his hand over Cress’ breasts and waist. He looked at her, hands moving up to her legs.
“It's alright”, Monroe said behind James and slung his arms around James' chest, “We like you to do it, we wanna see it.”
James swallowed again, hands tightened around Cress’ legs, then he crawled over her, Monroe's hands still touching his back, hovering behind him like a big shadow.
James’ head fell forward on Cress' shoulder when he pushed into her and his breath stuttered. Cress raised her hand, touching his cheek, while pulling him down into a kiss.
She kissed James with tongue, dominating the kiss and James started to move inside her, his breath hitched audibly.
Cress was pretty sure he wouldn't last long, but that was okay, it was not about her or Monroe going out satisfied, it was about James.
James broke the kiss and closed his eyes, finding a slow rhythm, lazily fucking her into the mattress, his hands fisting the sheet beside Cress’ head.
Monroe dragged his hands over James' shoulders and chest, “Such a pretty boy”, he said, leaning over James, pressing James back against his stomach, hooking his chin over James’ shoulder, James’ arms were trembling.
Monroe locked eyes with Cress, he moved in the rhythm of James' trust. Cress didn't need to look to know Monroe was grinding against James’ back. James' trembling arms and the stuttering in his breathing were evidence enough.
Cress grabbed James’ chin, forcing him to look at her, James opened his eyes again, looking at her, “Good boy, James”, Cress said, her voice was soft.
And finally James moaned, he bit his bottom lip, sweat was sliding down his temple.
“You're a good boy”, Cress said again, not breaking the eye contact, “You're such a good boy.”
James' eyes glittered in the moonlight and his rhythm faltered, he moaned quietly again, reaching his limit.
“Yes, you are”, Monroe said, touching James’ chest, hugging him. James blinked and a drop fell on Cress’ cheek, she didn't know if it was sweat or a tear and she wouldn't ask James.
Cress stroked his cheek and smiled, “We’ll stay with you, James, no worries.”
James moaned and his arms shook, he squeezed his eyes shut and his rhythm came to a stop, only pushing into her one final time. Cress could feel his heartbeat under his skin and the pulsing inside her.
He was gorgeous, he was special, he was theirs.
She slung her arms around James’ shoulders, pulling him down into the crook of her neck and kissed him on the cheek, “You're such a baby, James.”