Comment on Your Words In My Head

  1. A fan of sardonic sprite (Guest) on Chapter 2 Wed 06 Jul 2022 11:55AM UTC

    I found this this morning while I was eating breakfast and to be honest I am surprised I hadn’t read it yet! And, like all your stories, it was so good! 😊
    I would like to say that one of my favorite types of stories is the misunderstanding… where one person reads all the scenarios wrong and when they are faced with trying to understand what happened they are presented with information that’s not false but seems to support their misunderstanding of the situation. Of course, these stories must have a happy ending where all the misunderstandings and miscommunication is resolved… so this particular story fit that to a T! 😊
    I really like how you described all of Jason’s feelings and emotions… from having that happy warm feeling for making an A+ on his English paper, to reminding himself why he shouldn’t fight students even if they’re deserving or he’s defending himself, and how all that flies out the window when the students start talking about Bruce and Dick. And then, Bruce coming in at just the right moment to save the day, and Jason… doesn’t see it like that?? Are you blind Jason? But you did such a wonderful job of going through his thoughts and what he was thinking and how he was misreading the situation that I understood! Sometimes when reading a story a character’s actions can seem to come out of left field cause it’s hard to follow that character’s train of thought, and sometimes I know this is on purpose, but I just felt you did a really good job of showing Jason’s thoughts without just telling the reader what he was thinking and letting the reader follow Jason’s logic through that. It was a good balance of showing the character’s intentions and motivations without doing a preachy or academic explanation to get that across. Great writing!
    Also I love you pulling Dick into this story! I love how he is all protective older brother and he can read Bruce’s emotions better than anyone (he is showing no emotion… he’s about 3 seconds away from an emotional meltdown… who else would know that but Dick? I loved it!) good job also to Bruce for enlisting help and not trying to do everything yourself or not bother others. And I’m so so glad Bruce knew the true story about the fight. As a reader you always want that! I’d loved to have been a fly on the wall when Bruce gave the school staff and the parents the what-for! (Also, a side note, i wonder if the school didn’t communicate with Bruce properly cause they remember how he was when he had to come and discuss some of Dick’s fights, and were like, well, we don't want to open that can of worms if we can help it… maybe we can resolve this before he gets here… oh man didn’t think this through ABORT ABORT ABORT!) I love how Dick starts to realize the whole misunderstanding and being like, oh, boy… And Dick being like, I got into 17 fights when I was in school, Jason. Perfect big brother moment!
    And Bruce… being so relieved Jason’s okay, then realizing he was so angry he didn’t realize Jason was upset and worried and scared. That he accidentally gave him the wrong idea about his anger… oh that hit me right in the heart! And his explanation to Jason about his anger was so good! And his “you belong here, Jaylad, you’re my son, I’ll always want you, you’re such a great person, I love you” speech was perfect! Yay to good father Bruce Wayne!
    Also loved your comment about “pass the emotional brain cell” 😂. Priceless!
    And boy, your note about how this parallels why Jason ended up running away to find his mother and ended up getting killed…I’m glad you pointed that out cause, wow… that’s so true! It helps me also better understand Jason as a character and why he ended up doing that. Glad you slapped your hand away from the angst itch though! 😂😊
    As always, wonderful job! Love to read your work! Thanks so much for all the great stories! 😊

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    1. sardonic_sprite on Chapter 2 Wed 06 Jul 2022 07:31PM UTC

      What's funny is usually misunderstanding stories drive me crazy. It's just that the Batfam has such dysfunctional communication already that any mistake can make sense 😂

      I'm so glad that Jason's interpretation came across as understandable. Obviously all of us on the outside know (bc I write Good Dad Bruce 😂) that Bruce is there to save the day! But poor insecure bby Jay can't see outside what he expects to see.

      Dick showed up out of nowhere when I was writing this lol, but I'm glad he did. And I honestly didn't even think of that with the school! But you're right 😂 They very much wanted to avoid A Scene but they got one anyway 😂

      If you've ever seen Monsters Inc, Bruce had that moment like when Sully roars and scares Boo. This "oh shit i scared my kid and didn't even know it"

      Dick would very much like to hand off the emotional braincell to someone else for a while, please and thank you.

      Yeah...
      Instead I wrote an entire hurt no comfort fic about Jason's death...

      You're very welcome 😊 Thank you for your lovely comments!

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      1. A fan of sardonic sprite (Guest) on Chapter 2 Wed 06 Jul 2022 08:05PM UTC

        I would agree that sometimes the misunderstanding stories can be a bit crazy or forced… but you’re right that the Batfamily’s dysfunction, not to mention the multiverses they exist in, lend themselves to great misunderstanding/mistake stories! 😂 might be one of the reasons I’ve really taken to Batman fanfic !

        It’s been a while since I’ve seen Monsters Inc. but I do remember that! And now I’m thinking about how Bruce and Sully are kinda the same and not just from accidentally scaring kids… they adopt kids that may or may not need to be adopted cause… they were sorta kidnapped??? 😂😂😂 but the kids seem to be okay with it!

        Poor Dick, he’s like why do I always have to be the one to deal with the emotional turmoil in this family? 😂

        Oh, I’ve read your hurt no comfort fics… both that one and also the one with Tim dying and Jason the angel… they’re both so good but oh gosh, they hurt… I guess that’s what you were going for, but hey, I guess you had to scratch that angst itch somehow! Just makes me need to read you fluffy stories and enjoy them all the more! 😊

        Thanks for writing back! 😊 love to hear your thoughts about your stories!

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        1. sardonic_sprite on Chapter 2 Wed 06 Jul 2022 10:01PM UTC

          Yeah, both Bruce and Sully got bit by the adoption bug 😂

          Well, Dickie, because Alfred is Done 😂😂😂

          Oh yes. My friend gave me the writing prompt for the deadTim angelJason one and I literally screamed out loud in choir 😅😅 She knew exactly where my brain would take the dialogue lines lol.

          I love to share them! ☺️

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          1. A fan of sardonic sprite (Guest) on Chapter 2 Wed 06 Jul 2022 10:26PM UTC

            It’s a great story, one you should be proud of… but gosh it’s a deep heavy one too! As much as I hated to read about Tim suffering and mourning a young death, it is comforting to know that Jason, his Robin, was there to help him see that though he shouldn’t have to die, it is okay cause the pain will soon pass and life after death can be a glorious thing… well done! Yes your narration and dialogue were good in this story…painful, but good!

            Oh, you know that’s par for the course for Alfred I guess! I was JUST reading a comic where he was asking Bruce if he was going to patrol after being up for 36 hours, and Bruce thinks about resting but heads down the the Batcave, and Alfred says “oh good show, sir. For a moment I was afraid you had a rational thought”. I thought I would die I was cackling so hard! 😂😂 Alfred’s just like, can’t talk sense into that one… what you going to do? Of course, that was pre-children Batman… maybe after kids he is a little more easily persuaded? I have my doubts though…😂

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            1. sardonic_sprite on Chapter 2 Thu 07 Jul 2022 03:43AM UTC

              Thank you! It hurt to write, honestly. I couldn't sleep until I wrote something fluffy.

              🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 omg I'm dying. Sassy Alfred is literally the best thing ever.
              See, after Dick and Jason nah, not really. It's after TIM that Bruce goes to Alfred, haunted, and apologizes for ever refusing to go to bed or rest an injury. He cannot believe he was ever as bad as Tim is, but Alfred just calmly assures him, "oh no sir you were far worse."

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              1. A fan of sardonic sprite (Guest) on Chapter 2 Thu 07 Jul 2022 01:34PM UTC

                This is too perfect! 😂😂😂 “oh no sir you were far worse” I can’t handle it! 😂😂😂
                What’s that curse parents put on their children?…”one day when you have kids, I hope they’re just like you!” 😂😂😂

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                1. sardonic_sprite on Chapter 2 Thu 07 Jul 2022 04:02PM UTC

                  Oh yeah 😂 Bruce has so many regrets

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