Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Shiro stepped off the sand, numb and tired and covered in blood. It was an exhaustion no amount of sleep could fix. He just needed…

    He needed to get away from here, but that wasn’t likely to happen. Not anytime soon.

    And even if he did escape, what then? He had no idea where the Holts were, no idea how to get back to Earth, no allies, nothing. He had nothing except a title he didn’t want. A title he’d earned by slaughtering other prisoners just like him, afraid and tired and hopeless.

    It was useless. He might as well die on those sands.

    Some instinct -the highest instinct of all, perhaps -kept him alive. He didn’t want to die.

    Despite everything, he didn’t want to die.

    The guards didn’t take him back to his cell -that was the luxury his winning streak had earned him: his own cell -instead taking him down unfamiliar corridors in a completely different part of the ship.

    He might have cared, months -lifetimes -ago, when he still tried to map out corridors and memorize guards patterns and…

    He didn’t care now. As long as they didn’t lead him back to the Witch’s lab, he didn’t care. And this wasn’t the right way.

    He was shoved into a shockingly nice set of rooms -certainly not a cell -with plush rugs on the floor, furniture, lights…

    He stopped, startled and confused. What-?

    “This is a reward,” said a large Galra, sitting on a sofa. “The bathroom is through that door. Bathe.”

    The words didn’t quite register at first. The Galra hadn’t even looked up, and it- it would be so easy for Shiro to-

    The Galra had one natural eye, and a prosthetic of some kind where the other would have been, as well as a prosthetic arm. Bigger and more dangerous-looking than Shiro’s.

    “Go. Bathe,” the Galra said again.

    Shiro hesitantly turned towards the door that, apparently, led to the bathroom. He didn’t think someone would hurt him here -if they wanted to hurt him, they usually just did that in his cell, or in the Witch’s lab -but…. He couldn’t quite relax.

    The prospect of an actual bath, or shower, or...whatever, was too good to pass up, though.

    He was able to lock the bathroom door behind him -although there was probably an override -and that helped some.

    There was a shower, and after a few moments, Shiro was able to get it going. The water was hot, and… They usually just had him strip so they could hose him down with cold water.

    He stripped eagerly, suddenly desperate to feel warm , for the first time in….

    The ships were always so cold .

    The water was almost too hot, when he stepped underneath the spray, but it felt so fucking good that he never wanted to leave. It soothed every aching muscle, washed away every drop of blood, made him forget everything he’d had to do to survive.

    But he couldn’t sat here forever. Surely they wouldn’t allow that.

    So he washed himself and dried himself and dressed himself (apparently they’d been expecting him, as there was a clean slave jumpsuit waiting for him) and went back into the main room.

    He’d learned not to speak unless asked to -which was only very rarely -so he stood quietly until he was noticed.

    It didn’t take long. The Galra stood. “Eat as much as you wish. Guards will collect you in the morning.”

    Shiro’s eyes fell on the spread on the coffee table. A veritable feast, even if he hadn’t been half-starved. And it was real food, too, not prison gruel.

    The Galra left without saying anything else, and then the second part of what he’d said got through.

    There was no bed here, but there wasn’t a bed in his cell, either. There was, however, a sofa, more than long enough for him to stretch out, and several blankets, and pillows…

    God, how sad has his life become, if he was excited about sleeping on a sofa?

    Still, the prospect of a hot meal of as much as he could eat and a nice place to rest his head was exciting. Almost too good to be true, but…

    Well, if they were going to do something to him, at least he’d have a full belly.

Shiro woke early in the morning, of his own volition; the food from last night was still there, so he ate what he could. There really had been too much food, and Shiro wished there was some way to sneak the rest back to his cell, but there were no hiding places on his person; the jumpsuit was skintight.

    A door opened, and Shiro tensed before he realized it wasn’t the door that led to the corridor.

    It wasn’t the Galra from last night. In fact, he barely looked Galra; other than the yellow sclera and the purple tone of his skin, he looked nearly human. A half-breed of some kind, surely.

    He wasn’t dressed like the arena or work slaves. Instead, he was draped in some kind of silky fabric, and he even wore jewelry: little piercings in his ears, delicate chains around his wrists and ankles. But there was no mistaking the golden collar around his neck.

    The slave -Shiro didn’t want to think about what kind of slave he was, but - paused for a moment. “I didn’t realize you would still be here.” He said it neutrally, and Shiro couldn’t tell if he was upset, or…

    Anyway, he’d been told that someone would collect him in the morning, and no one had come yet.

    “I will inform my master that the guards are late. Again,” the slave said, turning back  around. “You will not be punished.”

    Shiro let out a sigh of relief. He’d been punished for the guards’ mistakes before.

    He took a moment to look around. The room was nice. The bathroom had been nice. This Galra obviously had some pull. An officer, certainly, but how high up the chain of command? Pretty high, if he could afford to outfit his personal slave like that.

    But why...all of this? Why invite Shiro here to bathe and eat and sleep? No one had bothered him overnight, no one had really made any demands of him…

    It was hard to look past how nice it was, that he just couldn’t see the bigger picture. He didn’t know enough, about Galra culture, about anything.

    A few minutes later, the guards showed up and took him back to his cell to await his next match.

Chapter Text

    Lotor rarely went to the arena -it did not always dredge up good memories for him, and anyway, his father was often there -but today he did. Accompanied by Sendak, of course.

    Zarkon was not there today, and they had the Imperial box all to themselves, other than the two guards at the entrance.

    That meant Lotor didn’t have to stand behind Sendak’s shoulder or kneel at his feet; instead, he sat next to Sendak, resting his head on Sendak’s shoulder, disinterestedly watching the matches.

    The more lively matches would come later and, last of all, the Champion’s latest match.

    Lotor sighed. It would be a while yet, and there wasn’t much for him to do here.

    Sendak laughed softly. “You wanted to come with me,” he reminded Lotor.

    “I forgot how boring this could be, for a spectator.”

    He could tell that Sendak was rolling his eyes -eye -without looking. “Isn’t that how you ended up here in the first place?” He asked, tapping a claw against the collar around Lotor’s neck.

    “At least I had some fun,” Lotor grouched, pressing himself closer to Sendak’s side. It was always so cold ship-side, and these... garments… did nothing to keep the chill away. But Sendak was nice and warm.

    Sendak draped his arm over him. “You were magnificent,” he said softly. “One of the best.”

    “ One of?” Lotor asked archly.

    “You may have some competition in that department. This Champion…”

    “You like him.”

    “He reminds me of you,” Sendak said thoughtfully. “Though he didn’t choose to fight in the arena. He’s barely trained, but… He’s learning with each match. He’s smart, doesn’t make the same mistake twice. Refuses to give up or give in.”

    “Victory or death,” Lotor said quietly. “He will fail soon.”

    “Every Champion does, in time.”

    ”Hm,” was all Lotor cared to say about it.

    “I’ve ordered a gift for you,” Sendak murmured, changing the subject. “It should arrive later today.”

    It was Lotor’s turn to roll his eyes. “I fear that there are those who are starting to get the wrong idea, Sir . It is unseemly shower one’s slave in such wealth.”

    “You deserve it.”

    “Do I?” Lotor asked, looking up at him.

    “You make for a poor slave,” Sendak said, “but that is not all you are, is it, my prince?”

    Lotor inhaled sharply. It was true; he wouldn’t be a slave forever. As long as he bided his time… These poor creatures in the arena would live out the rest of their short lives here, but he wouldn’t. Sendak wouldn’t allow it.

    “Allow me to treat you like the prince you are,” Sendak continued, “so that when it is time for you to take your rightful place, you can do so with all the grace and dignity you can muster.”

    Lotor shook his head a little. Not in disagreement, just… Well. Sometimes it felt like this would last forever.    

    “Besides, I have nothing better to do with my earnings,” Sendak said. “I might as well shower you with all the finest things money can buy, because I know you won’t.”

    “It’s wasteful. Such extravagance-“

    “I want to,” Sendak murmured. “Let me.”

    Lotor smiled, privately, to himself. He wouldn’t admit it, but he did like being pampered and cared for in this way. “As you wish, Sir,” he said neutrally.

    Sendak kissed the top of his head. A tiny reward, perhaps, for letting him win. It wasn’t really an argument -they’d had this conversation numerous times over the years, and it always ended like this, and anyway, he didn’t need Sendak’s rewards. This arrangement they had wasn’t real. He was not a real slave, even is he must act like one. Even if everyone thought he was.

    The match he’d been waiting for was finally announced, and he sat up, leaning forward a little. There was no need to hide his eagerness from Sendak, not when Sendak was doing the same, watching avidly.

    The match began and ended as they all did, with the Champion retaining his title.

    However…

    He would not be led back off the sands. Normally he went almost docilely, numbly. Drained from the fight.

    Today he fought against the guards -they were well-armored, but even so - caught in some mania…

    “He’s been drugged,” Sendak noted.

    Lotor cursed. “They don’t think he can keep going much longer.” It was true that, upon closer inspection, he looked worn down. Tired. Defeated in a way that had nothing to do with his rankings.

    Various stimulants could be given to the gladiators in the arena, to make them keep going until their bodies gave out entirely. A crowd-favorite like the Champion couldn’t be allowed to start losing matches now; his death would have to be a dramatic, showy affair. Especially since he wasn’t Galra, and yet had managed to stay alive this long.

    “He can’t,” Sendak said. “It’s been almost a year; I don’t think anyone expected him to last so long.”

    The guards finally managed to drag the Champion off the sands.

    Sendak stood, and Lotor followed. There was nothing they could do from here.

    Lotor slipped through the corridors from the prisoners’ cells back to Sendak’s quarters. Technically, he wasn’t supposed to be there, but everyone knew that Sendak was his master, and they would assume that Sendak had sent him on an errand.

    After all, no one questioned Sendak, and by extension…

    He tried to quell his anger, but it was difficult, knowing what he knew now. He’d suspected, of course, but…

    The drugs they’d used on the Champion had a dual purpose, and…

    He hadn’t been in his cell, because he was being used already, by some other well-off Commander with the money to waste on such a-

    He stormed into Sendak’s quarters. “They’re whoring him out now.”

    Not all Gladiators were; sexual slavery wasn’t terribly common, which made his own situation somewhat unusual, but.

    Someone had enough interest in this Champion to-

    “Who?” Sendak asked.

    “They wouldn’t tell me,” Lotor huffed. “Only that he’s been drugged up enough that he won’t stop fucking begging for it.”

    The particular cocktail of drugs they’d given him was used recreationally, in much smaller doses, either as performance-enhancers or for sexual pleasure (or sometimes both), as lust and bloodlust were nearly the same emotion, as far as Galra were concerned.

    Sendak pinched his nose. “They probably won’t tell anyone. I’ve asked around, and apparently, he’s earned himself quite a...following, among High Command.”

    Lotor sniffed. “It’s disgusting, that they’ll use and discard him like this. How much longer do you think he’ll last?”

    “A month, at most,” Sendak said calmly. “Fortunately, we’re leaving in a week. We’ll take him with us.”

    That hadn’t been part of the plan; Lotor’s interest hadn’t been that deep, and while he was curious…. “Will they even-?”

    Sendak smirked. “You and I know that they don’t have a choice. Unless they want to take it up with Zarkon.”

    And no one ever did.

    “As far as this Champion… I imagine he’d rather be with us than in the Arena. I treat you well, don’t I?”

    Lotor laughed and slid into Sendak’s lap, draping his arms around his neck. “I’m not sure it’s quite the same thing at all. After all, we were...together, before all of this. I know you will never hurt me; he doesn’t.”

    Sendak kissed him. “I guess we could ask which he’d prefer: acting as a slave under my protection, or being forced to fight until his inevitable gory death.”

“First, we’ll need to actually talk to him,” Lotor said. “It sounds like he’ll be busy between his matches.”

“I’ll deal with that,” Sendak promised. “You just need to look as pretty as you normally do.”

“I think I can do that.”

Chapter Text

The gladiator in the arena had seemed familiar, but even so…

Sendak could never have guessed that Lotor would stoop to this level.

He didn’t dare glance at Zarkon, to see his reaction, as Lotor removed his helmet and knelt, looking beseechingly up at the Imperial box.

He’d fought his way up from the bottom to be here, the arena’s new Champion, and Sendak knew that it was all so Lotor could gain his father’s approval.

Approval he’d never get, now or ever, no matter what he did. Sendak just didn’t have the heart to tell him that.

“Get out,” Zarkon said coldly, colder than the void of space. “I will speak to my son alone.”

Sendak started to rise, as well, but Zarkon stopped him. “You will stay and witness this, Commander.”

”Yes, Sire,” Sendak said, hiding behind the obedient little soldier boy everyone thought him to be.

Lotor’s head was bowed now, his way of trying to hide his anxiety about whatever was about to happen.

It took nearly fifteen minutes for the stands to empty completely, and cold sweat was dripping down Sendak’s back by the time it was over. Lotor didn’t talk about his relationship with his father, but Sendak didn’t need to ask to know that things were….fraught. To put it mildly.

When they were alone -except for the sentries; Zarkon trusted no one enough to be completely alone with them (except for, perhaps, the witch) - Zarkon spoke: “How dare you.”

”Father, please let me-“

“Silence.”

Lotor flinched.

“You have shamed me further,” Zarkon continued. “Did you think I would be impressed by this display? Do you think I should be impressed that you managed to defeat a couple of slaves?”

“No, Father,” Lotor whispered. “I just thought-“

“You are my son, and this sort of conduct is disgraceful.”

“The Arena used to be a place for honorable combat,” Lotor said. “A place for the best warriors to showcase their skill.”

“You are not a warrior, skilled or otherwise. You are weak and pathetic, and it disgusts me to acknowledge you as my son, so I won’t. If you wish to act like a slave, then so be it. Commander.”

Sendak flinched. “Yes, Sire?”

“I am gifting you this slave, as a reward for you recent promotion. Do with him as you like, so long as he remains alive.” Zarkon stood and left before Sendak could say anything.

Which was good; Sendak didn’t know what to say.

He sat frozen for a moment, then realized Lotor was still kneeling in the sand, alone and probably terrified, although he’d never let on.

Sendak jumped over the edge of the box and knelt down by Lotor’s side. “Lotor?”

“Get away from me!” Lotor snarled. “Don’t act like you had nothing to do with this! I knew you were a possessive bastard, but I didn’t think you would stoop this low. So unless you want to lose your other eye, stay the fuck away from me.”

Sendak moved back a little; Lotor didn’t make idle threats. “I had no idea,” he said. “I didn’t know you were fighting in the arena, I didn’t ask the Emperor to- Do you really think I would-? All because I was a little jealous?”

”I don’t know,” Lotor whispered. “I don’t know anymore.” He turned away, burying his face in his hands, but Sendak knew he was crying.

    He pulled Lotor into his lap without a second thought. It was the first time he’d comforted Lotor when it wasn’t the middle of the night, but it wasn’t so different really.

    “I’m sorry this happened,” Sendak said. “If there was anything I could do, I would. But I’ll do what I can to make this...palatable for you, alright? I’m not going to ask you to do anything you don’t want to do, and I’ll- I’ll be able to protect you, and-“

    “Why doesn’t he love me?” Lotor whispered, so quietly it was almost impossible to hear.

    Sendak’s heart broke a little. “I don’t know.”

    He held Lotor for a while longer, until Lotor climbed to his feet. “There are a few things I want to get from my quarters, if I can,” he said numbly, staring at his feet. “Can I bring Kova with me?”

    “Of course,” Sendak said immediately. As if Lotor needed to ask.

    “And then… I suppose we should...talk. About this.” He wiped his eyes and turned to walk away.

    Sendak’s quarters were very nice, thanks to his recent promotion, and more than big enough for both of them and Kova.

    Lotor hadn’t collected much from his quarters -a sketch pad, Kova, a few other small items -and Sendak didn’t have much either, so…

    “Swear to me that you had nothing to do with this,” Lotor said, once the door was closed and locked behind them.

    “I swear,” Sendak said. He never would have asked for something like this. Maybe he did want Lotor all to himself, but this wasn’t how he wanted to go about that. “I’ll swear on whatever you want me to: my honor, my parents’ graves, anything .”  

    Lotor’s shoulders slumped. “Alright,” he whispered. “What- what will you do with me, then?”

    “We just have to convince everyone else that you’re my slave,” Sendak said. “What happens behind closed doors is between us.”

    Lotor nodded absently. “I...suppose so.”

    “I won’t make you do anything objectionable in public,” Sendak said, “but you will have to do what I say. But here, or when we’re alone… I won’t ask you for anything. It’s… an act, and there’s no point in acting of there’s no audience.”

    “My father expects you to-“

    “Your father said I could do with you as I wished,” Sendak said, “as long as you don’t die. This isn’t ideal, but we could make it work, Lotor.”

    “I’d deserve whatever you wanted to do to me,” Lotor said. “I’m such an idiot, for thinking that would work. I just wanted him to notice me, Sendak. I-“

    “Oh, Lotor,” Sendak said with a sigh. “He never gave you a chance, and that’s not your fault.”

    “How many of the others would have leapt at this opportunity?” Lotor asked. “They’d- hurt me, make me suffer…”

    “I won’t,” Sendak said firmly. “I promise you, Lotor. I said I would make this as palatable for you as possible, and I meant that. And it’s not forever.”

    “Isn’t it?”

    “When Zarkon dies, he won’t be around to make either of us do anything.”

    “Who’s to say that he will die?”

    “Everyone has to die sometime.”

    Lotor looked at him for a moment, then smiled a little. “If I didn’t like you so much, maybe I’d turn you over to my father for saying that. Maybe he’d-“ He stopped himself. “We’ll make this work. Thank you.”

    “Thank you,” Sendak said, “for not scratching my eye out.”

    “You’ve always been good to me,” Lotor said, “even when we were supposed to be rivals. I hope this doesn’t change that.”

    “Nothing’s changed between us,” Sendak promised.

    Lotor’s smile grew softer and fonder.

Chapter Text

Sendak was often gone by the time Lotor woke up, so he could get some time on the training deck in before he began his shift. Sometimes, though, like today, he left an offering with breakfast to let Lotor know that he was thinking about him.

    Often jewelry, although not always. Lotor himself was something of a status symbol for Sendak, and decorating him with various beautiful and expensive trinkets only added to his perceived power and position.

    And… For Lotor, those trinkets were an insurance policy. They were at war, and war was dangerous. There was always a possibility that Sendak would go into battle and not return. Not something that Lotor liked thinking about, but Sendak was the only thing standing in the way of a far worse fate, so he couldn’t afford to not confront the idea.

    If something happened, and Lotor needed to leave… He’d have these funds, disguised as shimmering jewels and brittle metals, a fortune and a half, to be sold or bartered away in exchange for safe passage, a ship, a new life… whatever he required.

    He knew, upon opening the box Sendak left for him, that this was not something he’d part with unless he was desperate and starved.

    It was, of all things, a delicate circlet, almost a crown. Simple and elegant. Not gold, as most of the things Sendak gave him were. It was silver-colored, but was probably a more expensive metal -platinum, or luxite, or some other rare ore.

    Not at all an appropriate thing to gift a slave. The quality of the jewelry Sendak gave him was already starting to raise eyebrows; there was no way he could wear this symbol of power where anyone could see him.

    Sendak probably realized that, though. What had he said at the arena yesterday? “You make for a poor slave, but that is not all you are, is it, my prince?”

    Smiling softly to himself, Lotor set the circlet on his head, already working out the best way to reward Sendak for this.

    Sendak returned to his quarters after a long day to find Lotor wearing the gift he’d left for him, and nothing else.

    Lotor only grinned seductively from where he was elegantly draped across the bed. Foreplay was a game to him, and sex was the reward for playing.

    The crown Sendak had bought him was elegant, graceful, and not at all gaudy. It was deceptively delicate, much like Lotor himself.

    Lotor wore it like he was the emperor already, fresh from the steps of the Kral Zera, radiating power that made Sendak want to knelt at his feet and beg for his favor.

    “Thank you,” Lotor said, as Sendak continued to stare, speechless. “It’s quite lovely, although I fear that our little secret may be discovered, should I wear this where others could-“

    “Then don’t,” Sendak rasped. “Wear it only for me.”

    Lotor’s grin grew broader, more knowing. “As you command, Sir.”

    “No,” Sendak said.

    “No?”

    “You are my prince,” Sendak said. “That crown is yours, and I am at your command.”

    Lotor inhaled sharply. “Is that so?” He murmured, low and deep and far less playful that before. ”Strip.”

    Sendak obeyed without hesitation. He had no reason to fear Lotor’s commands; they were in this together, and what happened here was between them alone.

    Lotor watched, of course, his eyes dark and attentive. Sendak knew he was attractive -not in a cocky, self-aggrandizing way; it was simply the truth -and he didn’t mind Lotor watching. He was going to do more than watch anyway.

    When he finished, Lotor beckoned him over with a simple, elegant gesture, crooking one finger.

    Strength was power, in the Galra view of things, but now… Lotor held more power in that finger than Sendak had in his whole body, for all that it must appear otherwise to any outsider.

    Sendak made to climb over Lotor, but Lotor shook his head, just once. “Lie back for me.”

    Sendak swallowed hard, his cock throbbing with how much he wanted, before obeying, the role so easy to fall into by now. He reached for the lube, once he was settled against the pillows, but Lotor stopped him with a hand on his wrist.

    “I thought about this today,” he murmured. “Opened myself up thinking about you, and how good your cock feels… Wanted to be ready when you returned.” He straddled Sendak’s hips, making to sink down on his cock, but Sendak stopped him with a firm grip on his waist.

    “Did you come?” He asked, blown away at the idea of Lotor fingering himself open; how had he done it? Face-down in the pillows, with his ass in the air? Leaning against the shower wall, with the water drowning out all his moans? On his knees, like he was now?

    “No,” Lotor said. “I wanted to wait for you.”

    The burst of arousal was so strong that it was like a punch to Sendak’s stomach, and it was a good thing he was still holding Lotor in place; the feeling of Lotor sinking down onto his cock would have made him come instantly.

    “ Fuck , you’re perfect,” Sendak breathed.

    Lotor’s ears went back as his eyes widened a little, but he managed to school his expression before Sendak could comment on it. He tapped on Sendak’s hand, a signal that he wanted him to let go.

    Sendak loosened his grip enough to let Lotor sink down on his cock, and it was almost too much, knowing that Lotor had prepared himself for this combined with how tight and slick he was…

    “I’ve been waiting all day for this,” Lotor said sharply, as if he knew what Sendak was thinking, “so you better make it worth my while.”

    “Yes, Your Highness,” Sendak shot back. As if he’d ever left Lotor unsatisfied.

    Lotor started slow, rolling his hips a little. The light caught on the circlet and his hair, making both glow, and he was radiant and powerful. If anyone ever found about this… Sendak would be disgraced, Lotor would be punished, probably by being given to a different, crueler commander.

    But this was just for them. It was more difficult to define their relationship in the bedroom than outside it, but this, at least, was easy. Lotor knew what he wanted and wasn’t afraid to ask for it.

    Lotor picked up the pace, his way of letting Sendak know that he knew his mind had been wandering, and that he wanted his focus back on him.

    Sendak stroked his cock a few times in apology, then tangled his hand in Lotor’s hair to pull him down for a kiss.

    Lotor moaned theatrically, like an expensive whore, one of his little quirks. He could be almost perfectly silent during sex, if he wanted to be, but he must have found it amusing.

    No matter; there were other ways to tell if he was truly enjoying himself: the way his hips stuttered in their rhythm at the change of angle, the heat coming off his cheeks and ears, the way the hair at the nape of his neck was soaked through with sweat, the little flicks and jerks of his ears.

    “You’re beautiful,” Sendak murmured. “Beautiful, sharp, deadly… Does it amuse you to know that we’ve fooled them all?”

    Lotor’s response was a soft, quiet sigh. A nod.

    Sendak bit his earlobe, hard enough to sting, and toyed with one of Lotor’s nipple piercings.

    Lotor moaned, less ostentatiously, arching his back as he came, putting his lithe body on display. He was truly beautiful like this, out of his mind with pleasure, a sight no one else alive had ever seen.

    Sendak scooped up some of his come and held his fingers up to Lotor’s lips. Lotor took them into his mouth without question, sucking and lapping the come away, shifting his hips restlessly, and that was enough to push Sendak over the edge.

    Lotor gathered himself enough to pull himself off of Sendak’s cock and collapse on the bed next to him, his chest still heaving.

    Sendak turned onto his side to study him. Lotor was more open after sex and while he woke up, so it was easier to read him, get real answers out of him.

    Plus, he was just... gorgeous . Most would have considered him exotic, if they found him attractive at all. They didn’t stop to consider his lean strength, the way he used his smaller frame to his advantage, the condensed power in his limbs.

    “Are you happy here?” Sendak asked finally, brushing Lotor’s hair back, away from his face.

    “Incredibly,” Lotor purred, as playful and seductive as ever. “How could I not be?” He teased Sendak’s cock with a few light touches, enough to make Sendak wince in discomfort at the overstimulation.

    “There’s more to life than sex,” Sendak said drily.

    Lotor shrugged. “Perhaps, but it is the most fun part, isn’t it?”

    “I just want to know if you need anything,” Sendak said. “Anything at all.” He rubbed his thumb over Lotor’s cheekbone; Lotor closed his eyes and leaned into it, a soft purr bubbling up from his chest.

    It was difficult to get him there, but it was, if nothing else, a sign of momentary contentedness.

    Sendak couldn’t resist kissing him again, and Lotor clung to him, leaving no space at all between them.

    “You still feel guilty,” Lotor murmured, “for all that this isn’t your fault.”

    “All of the jewels in the universe are a paltry sum compared to what you should have: your freedom, to begin with.”

    “And I will have that one day,” Lotor said firmly. He rubbed his cheek against Sendak’s, the purr building back up. “In the meantime… I am happy here, with you. You’ve taken such good care of me, even when you don’t have to, and I am grateful for that.”

    “You shouldn’t have to be grateful,” Sendak protested. “You deserve basic respect and-“

    Lotor laughed softly. “That’s not the way the universe works. We both know that. Your chivalry is appreciated, so let’s leave it at that.” He sat up a little and lifted the circlet off his head, carefully placing it on the bedside table. “If I didn’t know better, I’d almost think you were trying to court me, with gifts as fine as this.”

    “I just want you to remember that you are a prince, that this is not your true place,” Sendak said, as much to convince Lotor as himself.

    Lotor paused for a moment, narrowing his eyes, but he didn’t say anything about it, just curled up next to Sendak to enjoy a few minutes of quiet before dinner.

Chapter Text

Shiro had never felt this awful in his life.

    A combination of fear, uncontrollable lust, anger, and revulsion clawed at him, probably due to whatever they were injecting into him before each match now.

    He didn’t know why; no one told him anything. He hadn’t had a real conversation with anyone since Kerberos, and he missed that. He missed so many goddamn things, and he hated this, hated this burning in his veins that made him desperate and disproportionately strong and unnervingly quick to submit.

    It felt wrong , on the most basic levels.

    They’d never left him this long before. These days, after a match, he was whisked right to some high-ranking officer’s quarters, and expected to get on his knees and take… whatever they gave him.

    It felt good, and he hated that, too. It was the only good part of his days, and he almost found himself looking forward to his daily rape, as if this whole “being whole to fight to the death for sport” thing wasn’t bad enough. As if the “being experimented on in painful and sometimes humiliating ways that took away his bodily autonomy” thing wasn’t bad enough.

    No, now he was fucked up enough that he practically craved his own rape and debasement, because at least that way he had some physical contact that was at least somewhat pleasurable.

    But this...being left in his cell alone, with no one to touch him, with his wrists still shackled so he couldn’t touch himself… It was hell. He had no idea if they were just -going to leave him like this, or what, but it felt like hours had passed. Not just hours, but days, years, centuries.

    And finally the door opened, and he’d never been so fucking relieved in his life.

    He was still afraid, still angry, still… Because he didn’t know why they’d left him so long, didn’t know anything, only knew the burn of the drugs that ate into him.

    He wanted to fight this, but… If he did fight now, would they simply leave him here? Make him ride the rest of this agony out alone?

    So he complied, for all that it was a monumental effort to hold back the rage burning in his lungs, molten and vicious. It settled in his stomach, strengthening and fortifying him, adding to his prowess, and reason was so much harder to hold on to now; these desires were too animalistic, too savage, and he needed-

    But he wouldn’t get that if he was trapped in his cell, so he let the guards lead him down the corridors that twisted sinuously like he was in the belly of some great beast. If he hadn’t been drugged up to the eyeballs, he might have noticed that they were taking him down a vaguely familiar path. Not to the Witch’s lab, thank God , but...familiar all the same.

    They unshackled him and shoved him into a room, causing him to stumble a little. He caught himself, shrinking back against the door, unsure where, exactly he was, but knowing what they wanted from him.

    He wouldn’t give it to them without a fight. That was his one rule: he could enjoy it, but he had to make them fight for it. He wouldn’t roll over like an obedient dog, begging for cock.

    There was a sound of disgust from one corner of the room, and he looked: the pretty half-breed slave from a few days ago, his scowl doing nothing to detract from his beauty.

    “Did you not tell them,” he said irritably, looking at the other occupant of the room, “that you wanted him lucid?”

    “I did,” said the high-ranking officer from before. “I’ll talk to them later.”

    The slave made another disgusted sound. “You might as well send him back, then; we’ll get nothing from him in this state.”

    “No!”

    Both pairs of eyes were on Shiro in an instant, unblinking and eerie. Predatory.

    “ Please ,” Shiro breathed. The thought of being sent back to his cell… His pride was a small price to pay. “Please, I’ll do anything.”

    There was a long moment of silence as the two Galra exchanged glances.

    “You are in no condition to- to even make a rational decision,” the slave said.

    Shiro didn’t know a lot about Galra culture, but he didn’t think this was normal behavior for a slave. Too outspoken, too... in-charge .

    (The poisoned pleasure in his veins whispered: you could put him in his place, you could make him submit, you could- )

    “Please,” Shiro pleaded, on the verge of tears. Which… He hadn’t cried once while in Galra captivity. Not once. But this… This was the final straw. The prospect that they might leave him alone for a night. “I need…I can’t-“

    “Very well,” the officer said with a sigh. “Come here.”

    Shiro balked suddenly, pressing himself up against the door behind him, unreasonably afraid for some reason.

    “Fine,” the officer huffed. “Lotor?”

    The slave walked over. He was so graceful and delicate… It would be easy to break him. If he’d fought this creature in the arena… With this drug thrumming through his veins, he wasn’t sure what he would have done when he won.

    The slave flashed a coy smile over his shoulder at Shiro before he straddled the officer’s lap.

    Comparatively, he was tiny . Delicate, fragile… It woke some deep desire within Shiro -his own or the drug’s, he wasn’t sure -but he wanted… He wanted this creature, and he didn’t care what he had to do to make that happen.

    They appeared to be discussing something, but while Shiro could hear them, their conversation was just radio static: meaningless and annoying.

    He didn’t know how it happened, and that terrified him as much as it invigorated him: one moment, he was still half-crouched by the door, and the next, the pretty half-breed was underneath him, wide-eyed yet hard .

    It was puzzling, but- Shiro didn’t have the brainpower left to wonder about it.

    He didn’t like the way the pretty half-breed was glancing away, to- to the officer, who was angry, but-

    Shiro bared his teeth, and the slave underneath him laughed and smirked, and that- he couldn’t have that, either.

    And then- the half-breed was facedown on the floor, Shiro’s mech hand on the back of his neck, grinding his face into the floor, his other hand- his real hand -yanking his hips up and back-

    He didn’t have enough hands, so he had to let the half-breed go for a moment to free his cock and shred the gossamer scraps the half-breed wore.

    He didn’t care what sorts of noises the half-breed made as he thrust in. He just needed -release, of any kind, physical or emotional or- or anything, because he was losing himself and he didn’t want to, he didn’t want to do this, but he had no choice and it hurt and-

    He came abruptly, and it didn’t help.

    He didn’t know why it didn’t help. It had helped every other time.

    He sat back, confused and afraid and hurting, trying not to cry- the Galra hated weakness, and they would punish him for it, they would make it hurt worse, they would-

    The slave collapsed, his limbs too weak to hold him up any longer. A surge of panic shot through Shiro.

    He’d- he’d had his way with this slave, this high-ranking officer’s slave, and-

    And yet… the sick, violent feelings still coursed through him. It hadn’t been enough, it-

    But he didn’t know what to do anymore, and he couldn’t hold back the tears anymore, and before he knew it, he was crying into his hands, futilely trying to stifle his sobs.

    And then… Someone was pulling his hands away, wiping his tears away, gently kissing his forehead. “Shh… we’ll take care of you. It’s not your fault, you’re alright…”

Chapter Text

    “...specifically ordered that he not be drugged?” Sendak asked coldly.

    Lotor smiled to himself as he padded to the door, then schooled his expression before entering the main chamber of Sendak’s quarters.

    “Yes, sir,” the officer said quietly. He shot a glance towards Lotor, but Lotor ignored him, waiting by the door as he was supposed to until Sendak acknowledged him.

    “Did you forget?”

    “No, sir.”

    “So you made a mistake,” Sendak said, and his tone made his thoughts on that very clear. “You will be lucky if I do not decide to send you to the arena in his place. Tell your Lieutenant to give you twenty-five lashes. If you forget to do so, I won’t bother with the arena. Am I clear?”

    “Yes, sir.”

    “Get out of my sight,” Sendak snapped.

    Once the officer left, Lotor pushed himself away from the wall. “Good morning.”

    Sendak turned to him and smiled a little. “Good morning. Are you alright?”

    “I’m fine,” Lotor said. A little sore, but nothing he couldn’t handle. He wasn’t exactly used to being pushed to the floor and fucked viciously like that. Not that it hadn’t been pleasurable. Still… “Are we still leaving tomorrow?”

    Sendak nodded. “Unless something comes up, although that doesn’t seem likely at this point.”

    Lotor hummed thoughtfully and wrapped his arms around Sendak’s neck, pulling him down for a kiss. “I’ll see what I can do here.”

    “Will you be alright alone with him?” Real concern showed in Sendak’s eye; Lotor still wasn’t really used to that. “I can-“

    Lotor kissed him again, more chastely. “I’ll be fine. Don’t worry.”

    “I can’t help it.”

    “It’s unseemly to show such concern for a slave,” Lotor teased.

    Sendak just sighed. “Lotor…”

    “I can handle myself,” Lotor said firmly. “Now go, or you’ll be late.”

    Sendak huffed. “Fine. Just… If you need something, you can contact me, and I’ll come right away.”

    “I know,” Lotor said. He kissed Sendak on the cheek one last time, and sent him on his way.

    Shiro’s head was fuzzy when he woke up.

    He couldn’t remember where he was, or…

    There was a soft canopy of some silky sort of fabric over his head, and a soft mattress underneath him.

    He was in an honest-to-god bed , for the first time in… so fucking long.

    He wasn’t alone, though, and that-

    He panicked, moving before his thoughts caught up to him, without regard to who might be in bed with him, and what they could do to him.

    He pinned the other occupant down, sending a tablet flying, putting his Galra tech arm at his throat, ready to- to activate it, at the first sign of aggression.

    He realized that it was the pretty half-breed slave. He’d seen him in the Imperial Box a few times, with the one-eyed officer, and of course that night he’d showered, and last night.

    His body was sore all over, and… he felt used , and his skin crawled with the sensation.

    The slave was remarkably calm, given the situation. He just looked up at Shiro, unresisting and pliant, making no move to do anything .

    “Give me one reason why I shouldn’t just kill you right now and- and leave,” Shiro hissed. That wasn’t like him, not really, but… He was a different man now than he had been. He’d kill if it meant living another day; who knew what he’d do for a chance at freedom ?

    “You would never leave Central Command alive,” the slave said calmly. “If my master caught you, you would wish you were back in the hands of the Druids.”

    “You’re just a slave, like me,” Shiro said.

    The slave quirked an eyebrow. “Am I? Which one of us has to fight for our dinner?”

    “You…” The implication of what this slave did for his dinner was clear enough; Shiro just didn’t want to say it.

    “Appearances are deceiving,” the slave said. And then, before Shiro realized what was happening, he was on his back under the pretty half-breed, pinned down in the same position the half-breed had been in just seconds before.

    “For instance, most think me to be nothing more than a fucktoy, a pretty thing to ruin and dispose of, but if you are to come with us, you would do well to remember than I am not.”

    “Come with you?” Shiro asked. He… He didn’t want- But-

    “Yes,” the slave said. “If you wanted. You wouldn’t have to go back to the Arena, and you would be kept out of the Druid’s hands. Not ideal, but…” He traced the scar across the bridge of Shiro’s nose with such delicate, gentle fingers that Shiro fought to breathe.

    “Would I have to- to-“ He couldn’t say it.

    “No. No, last night was… an exception. You had a bad reaction to the drugs you were given. I’m going to let you up, but if you make any move to attack me, you will be sent back to the arena, alright?”

    Shiro nodded. He didn’t want to go back, and… honestly, sex might be a small price to pay, if he never had to go back there again. If it kept him from the Druids.

    The slave waited a moment, then rolled off him. “Good. There is a bath waiting for you, through that door, and then we’ll eat and talk.”

    The bath was incredibly nice. The water was recirculated somehow, kept warm and clean, and Shiro kind of just wanted to stay there forever , if he could. If he was allowed.

    Finally, the emptiness in his belly forced him out; he’d been promised food, after all, and if it was anything like what he’d had that night he’d been permitted to shower and sleep here, then…

    He dressed in a clean jumpsuit, not standard prisoners’ issue, but not anything like what the half-breed wore, before going out to the main room.

    “Why are there two bathrooms here?” He blurted.

    “I was beginning to think you might have drowned,” the half-breed drawled, not looking up from the tablet he was perusing. “It’s for convenience; one doesn’t want blood and gore tracked through the bedroom.”

    Shiro sat tentatively at the table. “Can I-?” He asked, gesturing to the remarkably large spread in front of him.

    “Help yourself.”

    “Did you mean it?” Shiro asked, around a mouthful of some sort of savory dumpling. “About me coming with you? Can you even offer that?”

    The half-breed smiled wryly. “I did mean it, and the offer was extended to you on behalf of my master, who had to go earn his commander’s salary, so that he could support my extravagant lifestyle.”

    Shiro had the sense that it was a joke, even if he didn’t really get it. “So… Your master… Our master? How is that going to work?”

    “Is that the first question you want to ask?”

    Honestly, Shiro had so many questions and half-formed accusations that he wanted to bring up, but- “No, but. I don’t know where to start. I guess… I mean, I want to know what happened last night, but I also don’t want to know.”

    “It’s less real if you don’t know,” the slave said knowingly. “Let’s start with names. My name is Lotor, and my master is Commander Sendak.”

    “My name is Shiro,” Shiro said. And it was better to at least have names to attach to these faces. “Can I ask...why? Why did you let me sleep here that night, and let me shower, and give me food? Why are you being so nice to me today? Why… why are you offering to take me with you?”

    “Because you will die very soon, otherwise. Violently, in the arena, in the thrall of whatever drugs they decide to give you. The populace must remember that no matter how popular, how strong, how...impressive any single Champion is, they are merely the dirt underneath the boots of the Galra.”

    “They’re going to make an example of me.”

    Lotor nodded once. “Of course. If a single slave can resist the Galra, even momentarily, then who knows what would happen if every slave got it into their heads that maybe the Galra weren’t as superior as they claimed? So you must die, or you must be forced into a worse form of subservience.”

    “Worse?” Shiro asked.

    “It must appear so outwardly. As I said, what happened last night was the exception, not the rule. I know how those drugs can affect the mind and body. Perhaps you didn’t want it, but… You hardly had a choice in the matter.” Lotor finally set his tablet aside. “As for what will happen behind closed doors moving forward… That’s up to you.”

    “But the commander could…?”

    Lotor bowed his head. “He could, and while I know you have no reason to trust me, believe me when I say that he won’t . I’ve not always held this station, and I- We were...together, in a manner of speaking, before, and yet… He would not so much as touch me for the first month of our new arrangement.” He smiled softly. “He’s… He’s not a good man -none of us are -but he is a better man than most. You will be safe with us, until such a time as we can secure a way out for you.”

    “You’re serious,” Shiro breathed. This was the kindest offer anyone had made him, ever, because of the circumstances, because of where he could be, right now, if not for this stranger’s… “ Why ?”

    “My master’s reasons are his own,” Lotor said, smiling and standing. “Make your decision soon; we leave tomorrow.”

    “I’ll come with you.” It was his only real option, wasn’t it? Go with them, maybe be treated well, or… die, in the arena, or in the labs. Not a difficult decision.

    “I’m glad to hear it.”

Chapter Text

    Sendak had had a long day. There was all the usual bullshit to deal with, and he had to prepare to hand off his Central Command duties to Commander Throk, who was going to take up this post starting tomorrow.

    Still… He would be glad to leave Central Command. Lotor didn’t particularly like being here, and honestly… neither did Sendak. He could discipline the soldiers under his own command when they were rude to Lotor, but he couldn’t exactly discipline other commanders.

    Lotor was waiting for him -unfortunately, not in the nude -as he usually did, and so was the Champion.

    It was...a little uncomfortable. He didn’t quite know what to say to the Champion, considering not only had he watched him fuck his- fuck Lotor -he’d then fucked him himself. It had all been drug-fueled on the Champion’s end, and it was unlikely that he remembered, but Sendak had been completely lucid last night.

    “How was your day, Sir ?” Lotor asked.

    “You know you don’t need to call me that when we’re alone,” Sendak said automatically.

    “But we aren’t alone, are we?”

    Sendak crossed the room and began stowing his armor for the evening. At least Lotor wasn’t uncomfortable; he was as much of a brat as he always was. “How long, exactly, did you think we’d be able to keep up this charade for someone who is going to live with us for the foreseeable future?”

    “Well, we’ll never know, will we?”

    “I can’t believe anyone actually thinks you’re a slave,” the Champion blurted out.

    Both Sendak and Lotor turned to him. “He doesn’t act like this in public,” Sendak said. “Usually, he’s shockingly well-behaved.”

    Lotor shrugged. “I imagine it irritates some people that you managed to ‘tame’ me, when they never could.”

    Oh, that was certainly true. It irked Zarkon to no end that Lotor’s behavior had turned around completely after Sendak took “ownership” of him. At least in public. In private, it was another matter entirely, but of course Zarkon didn’t -and would never -know about that.

    “What will I need to- do?” The Champion asked. “In public. To keep this... charade going?”

    “Lotor will take care of ‘training’ you,” Sendak said. “Which means you won’t have to be in public for a few weeks anyway. After that… We’re returning to my sector, and things are more...relaxed there, than here.”

    “ Training ?”

    Lotor shrugged. “That would be my job, I suppose, as the senior slave. Training you how best to please our master. But we only need to make everyone else think that that’s what’s going on. So I guess we’ll play cards or something.”

    “He cheats,” Sendak warned.

    “I do not ,” Lotor said, scandalized.

    “You count cards!”

    “You can’t prove that!”

    Sendak rolled his eye. “Anyway, Lotor will be with you most of the time, so if you have any questions, I’m sure he would be happy to answer them for you. If you need anything, just let one of us know, and we’ll see what we can do.”

    “And don’t worry about the cost,” Lotor said. “You don’t owe us anything.”

    “Thank you,” the Champion whispered. “I still… I don’t know why you’re helping me, but thank you.”

    The whole situation was fucking surreal. You know, as if being taken prisoner by giant cat aliens and forced to fight like a goddamn gladiator wasn’t surreal enough.

    Shiro had no fucking clue what was going on between the commander and Lotor. Lotor had implied that it was merely sexual, merely a mutual-yet-temporary arrangement, without feelings.

    But good lord . Was he just not familiar enough with Galra culture? Or was there actually something going on there? Were they both just that oblivious?

    He’d enjoy watching them dance around each other, if he didn’t die of exasperation first.

    Regardless, they were both nice enough to him, although the commander was rather cautious, and mostly let Lotor handle him.

    (Maybe that was due to what Shiro didn’t remember from the previous night; he still wasn’t sure if he wanted to know or not.)

    They had dinner, with good food, the best Shiro could ever remember having.

    “Slow down,” Lotor said gently. “You’ll make yourself sick. No one is going to take it from you.”

    Shiro blushed, but forced himself to eat more slowly, and no one said anything else about it.

    Still, the food was good, and there was a lot of it, and they let him eat as much as he wanted to, chatting about things he didn’t quite understand or care about. This Commander and that General, and…

    But none of that would matter. He was leaving. He was leaving this awful place, and while this new place they were going to wasn’t home, wasn’t Earth, it had to be better. Lotor had remarked, earlier, that the Druids only rarely visited Sendak’s sector, and there was no arena there, either.

    And… maybe… when the time was right...they’d help him get back to Earth.

    And… It was too good to be true, but he wanted to believe it, so badly that he couldn’t force himself to refuse, even if there had obvious signs of treachery.

    And there weren’t. Other than both of them being kinder to him than anyone else had been in lifetimes.

    Finally, the commander and Lotor stood. “We are leaving first thing in the morning,” the commander said. “It would be best if you got some sleep.”

    “If the sofa is not acceptable,” Lotor added, “something else can be arranged.”

    “No, it’s...it’s great. Really. Thank you.”

    They left, going to the bedroom. There was obviously something between them, and Shiro didn’t believe that it was just sexual. Just a matter of convenience.

    But… He’d have plenty of time to find out.

Chapter Text

Lotor jolted awake, glancing around frenetically, trying to calm his breathing.

    “Lotor.”

    It had been so long, that Sendak knew exactly what was going on, exactly what to do.

    (In retrospect, the first few times he’d spent the night with Sendak had been… amusing, although at the time, it had been mortifying and terrifying and awful.)

    “Sorry,” Lotor whispered. He hated being back at Central Command; this last… it had been over a year now… had been difficult for him. Always was. “Didn’t mean to wake you.”

    “It’s alright. Do you want to talk about it?”

    “No.” He never did.

    Sendak rubbed his back, and…

    They weren’t friends, exactly, but maybe that was the only word he could come up with for what this was. They both got benefits from this arrangement, and companionship was on that list.

    When left to their own devices, most Galra were incredibly physically affectionate, and Sendak was no exception. And it was nice. Even when they weren’t having sex.

    But obviously it meant nothing. Sendak was merely helping him calm down so they could both go back to sleep.

    “We’re leaving tomorrow,” Sendak reminded him. “It’ll get better.”

    Lotor nodded. “I know.”

    Sendak hugged him for a moment. “If you ever change your mind, I’ll listen.”

    Lotor smiled softly. “Thank you.” They both knew that all this would end eventually, when Zarkon had no more power to force them together, but for now… This was a nice enough place to be.

    Maybe...when it was all over… maybe he’d miss it. Parts of it. This moment, for instance.

    Commander Throk met them in the hangar the next morning, for the official hand-off, along with several other commanders and various staff. No Zarkon, which wasn’t unusual; he was rarely found anywhere other than the Arena and the Throne Room.

    (Frankly, it was preferable; it was always so uncomfortable to meet with Zarkon when he had Lotor with him.)

    “Commander Sendak,” Throk drawled. “It will be a shame to see you leave us once more.”

    Throk hadn’t been in the field in centuries, the cowardly lackey preferring to stay at Central Command so he could lick Zarkon’s boots. He wasn’t remotely upset at having Sendak leave, and he probably hoped Sendak would be killed during this upcoming campaign; it would get him that much closer to Zarkon’s favor.

    “I’m sure you will handle your duties with aplomb,” Sendak said. He turned to leave.

    “Perhaps… Commander-to-Commander,” Throk said. “Now that you have a new slave in your possession… You might consider lending out your little plaything there? Now that you’ve broken him in.”

    Not an uncommon request, exactly; just… no one asked so bluntly. “I will not consider it,” Sendak said. “I don’t let others touch my property.”

    “It’s just temporary,” Throk whined. “A few weeks, maybe? I’m sure we could-“

    “You couldn’t handle him,” Sendak said dismissively. “Much less please him.”

    “It will be so boring here, though.”

    “Perhaps if you actually fought a battle or two, you wouldn’t be so bored,” Sendak said. “Enjoy your new command.” He left, finally, still irritated by Throk and his ridiculous commands.

    Once aboard the shuttle that would take them to his command ship, Lotor sidled up to him. “Don’t let Throk bother you so much,” he murmured, digging his fingers into Sendak’s left shoulder so skillfully that Sendak’s knees nearly buckled in relief. Gods, that prosthetic was heavy.

    “He’s a slimy bootlicker.”

    “He’s probably relieved that you said no,” Lotor said. “Or at least, he should be. I would have stuffed his own cock down his throat.”

    “I know he’s scrawny, but I don’t think he’s that flexible.”

    “I never said it would still be attached. Although I’m not sure it’d be enough for him to choke on it.”

    Sendak laughed, just a little bit. “I don't think anyone else could handle you, Lotor.”

    “You couldn’t even handle me,” Lotor said. “I just let you think you can.”

    “Is that so?” Sendak asked.

    Lotor hummed.

    Shiro, who had been standing off to one side kind of awkwardly, came over. Just, not as close as Lotor, of course. “What was that about?”

    “Throk’s an ass,” Lotor said. “That’s all.”

    “If he wasn’t,” Shiro asked hesitantly, of Sendak, “would you-?”

    “No,” Sendak growled.

    “He doesn’t like sharing,” Lotor supplied.

    “How does anyone think that you’re a slave?” Shiro asked.

    Lotor shrugged.

    “Look, I took on responsibility for you. I didn’t have to, but I did. And because I did, I have a duty to ensure your well-being,” Sendak said.

    “He’s very old-fashioned,” Lotor said. “Most Galra treat their slaves like dirt.”

    Sendak felt his ears twitch. “I don’t care what the others do,” he said. “I am not them, and while you are in my care, I will treat you better than that.”

    “Yes, sir ,” Lotor drawled.

    “Well, I guess I’m in good hands,” Shiro said, and Lotor laughed. Even when directed at Sendak, it was a beautiful sound.

    Although, Sendak was starting to think that maybe he’d gotten himself in over his head on this one.

    Haxus greeted them when they stepped off the shuttle.

    “Commander.”

    “Haxus.” He waved Lotor and Shiro off; Lotor would show Shiro around and make sure he was settled. In the meantime, Sendak had work to catch up on. Not that Haxus couldn’t command competently in his absence, of course, but. “Bring me up to date on my sector.”

    They walked to the bridge, Haxus scrolling through a list of things important enough to inform Sendak about.

    Just before they got to the bridge, Haxus stopped, facing him. “Sir?”

    “Haxus?”

    “I...heard that you purchased the Champion,” Haxus said carefully. “Is he here to stay?”

    “For now.”

    “Are you sure that’s wise, Sir?”

    “Are you questioning me, Haxus?”

    “No, Sir. Only… You seem to have a- a type, if you will.”

    “A type,” Sendak said flatly.

    “I wonder if you are not developing... inappropriate feelings for what is, essentially, your chattel.”

    “That’s none of your business, Haxus,” Sendak said sternly.

    “Of course, Sir. Forgive me, I- I just wish for you to be at your best, and not... distracted- “

    “I am not distracted,” Sendak snapped.

    “As you say, Sir.”

    Haxus didn’t mention it again, but… Was it that obvious? Did everyone know? Or was Haxus just...rightfully concerned about his commanding officer’s “predilections”?

    Did Lotor know?

Chapter Text

Sendak’s ship -well, his flagship, anyway, as apparently he commanded an entire fleet -was huge . Lotor had said that there weren’t many places he wasn’t allowed to go -mostly out of safety concerns -but Shiro was still reluctant to explore by himself, simply because if he got lost, he’d probably never be found. Even after Lotor’s impromptu tour.

    It didn’t help that he couldn’t read any of the signs.

    He mentioned that to Lotor when Lotor finally took him to Sendak’s quarters, and Lotor just shrugged. “We have nothing better to do. I can teach you.”

    “Ok,” Shiro agreed, which was how he ended up sitting next to Lotor while Lotor explained the Galra alphabet.

    Everything settled down over the next few weeks. Sendak left early every morning, and came back in time for dinner most nights. Shiro spent his days with Lotor, learning to read Galra or play card games or just...walking around the ship.

    Lotor showed him to the observation deck, which always gave stunning views of the unfamiliar stars as they flew past.

    Shiro had his own room, one of the side chambers in Sendak’s quarters, with an actual bed and everything. He was allowed to come and go as he pleased, and some nights, when he couldn’t sleep, for whatever reason, he found his way to the observation deck and just...looked at the stars, for hours.

    Ever since he was a child, he’d dreamed of reaching the stars, going higher further faster than anyone else.

    And look where it had gotten him.

    But...it could be worse. He could be back in the Arena, or in the witch’s lab, or dead. He could be back on Earth, permanently grounded, unable to achieve his dreams as his body failed him.

    He’d known that the Kerberos mission would be his last. They were going to force him into early retirement after, give him a medical discharge. If he was lucky, they’d let him teach, but even then… He would have had fifteen years, tops, and all the while, he’d have to live with his gradually weakening body, the new limitations that stopped him where nothing else ever had.

    And now… They’d taken his arm, probably saving him from that fate.

    But, if he ever made it back to Earth, what was waiting for him?

    Nothing. Absolutely nothing. He’d burned all his bridges to get here, and there was no way back.

    If not for the Galra… Maybe he could have stayed out here, happily, if he knew that the Holts were alright.

    One day, he would escape, and once he knew that the Holts were ok, once he warned Earth about the Galra, maybe…

    The stars wheeled by, and he wondered if Lotor knew their names. If Galra even named their stars.

    He got restless eventually, tired of doing nothing physical. He’d had to stay in shape to stay in the pilots’ program at the Garrison, and that meant he’d been going to the gym at least five times a week since he was fifteen. After that… He’d had to work out excessively during the Kerberos mission just to maintain his muscle mass in microgravity.

    And after that… Well.

    Lotor looked fit, too, so surely he worked out somehow?

    So Shiro eventually asked, and Lotor laughed, like it was a ridiculous question (which, maybe it was), and showed him the training deck.

    “This is the deck for the high-ranking officers,” Lotor explained, “which means only Sendak and his lieutenant have access.”

    “And us.”

    Lotor nodded. “But they’re on shift during the day, so you’ll have free reign. I probably should have mentioned it sooner, but I didn’t think you’d want to spar or anything like that.”

    “I’m just… restless,” Shiro said. “I need to- do something. And I- If something happens, and I end up back in the Arena, I don’t want to feel...helpless.” He finished in a whisper, but Lotor heard.

    His expression softened a little. “Alright. I can help you.”

    “You don’t have to,” Shiro protested. “I just-“

    “I’ve spent my entire life trying to fight Galra who were larger and stronger than I, and I think I managed to learn a few things. Let me put that knowledge to good use.”

    Lotor was a formidable opponent. He was older than Shiro -by how much he wasn’t sure, though -and therefore had more experience, plus he was taller, stronger, and faster. And cunning , in a way that none of the other gladiators had been.

    It was... fun .

    It was strange to think that Shiro might ever have fun here, in captivity (he had to keep reminding himself that he was in captivity, however nice this place was), but he was having fun, trying to outsmart Lotor, trying to disarm him or pin him to the floor or the wall.

    And it was hard, too. Physically, mentally. It didn’t leave him much time to think about anything but the bout, and that was the type of clarity Shiro had been looking for. He was simply too exhausted to do more than eat, fall into bed, and sleep at the end of each session.

    He suspected that Lotor was having fun, too, although it didn’t seem to be as strenuous for him. Why should it? He’d probably been doing this since before Shiro was born- he talked sometimes as if he was centuries old, if not older, and maybe he was was. Who knew with aliens?

    Sendak came to the training deck one evening after his shift was over, when Shiro was leaning against the wall, trying to get his breath back.

    “So that’s why he’s been going off to bed early,” Sendak drawled from the doorway. “Because you keep wearing him out.”

    Lotor looked up from where he’d been bending over to “stretch” -Shiro was pretty sure he was just showing off -and grinned. “I could wear you out, Commander, if you prefer.”

    Sendak muttered something under his breath; it sounded an awful lot like “brat”.

    But then he was picking up a practice weapon and charging at Lotor.

    Or, no, that wasn’t quite right. It was a feint, intended to draw Lotor into a counterattack, but Lotor was clearly expecting this move, and it began in earnest.

    Shiro watched in awe.

    Panic and desperation made you stupid, so now that Shiro wasn’t in the Arena anymore, he’d actually improved a lot. He had time to think before he acted, weigh the risks and benefits.

    There was none of that in front of him now. Not because either of them were panicking or anything, but because they were both so practiced and comfortable. They didn’t have to waste time thinking, when they had so much experience under their belts.

    It was beautiful. Like some kind of deadly dance.

    (It was undeniably hot, too, but this situation was already complicated enough.)

    Lotor ended up pinned underneath Sendak, both his arms stretched over his head, with Sendak smirking down at him.

    “Perhaps you should practice more,” Sendak said.

    “Perhaps you should pay more attention,” Lotor said, kicking Sendak in the stomach, sending them both tumbling across the floor.

    It was kind of like watching cats fight, without all the posturing. It looked serious, but they were laughing, so surely… Surely they weren’t actually hurting each other.

    Lotor somehow managed to hook his arm around Sendak’s throat from behind, and Sendak huffed. “Alright! You win.”

    Lotor let him go, and Sendak climbed to his feet, then offered Lotor a hand up. Lotor took it, and kissed Sendak on the cheek.

    Galra flightsuits left little to the imagination, so Shiro could see that they were both hard. And it was… incredibly awkward, to even notice that. He hadn’t been looking, but-

         He felt like he was intruding, like he was seeing something he wasn’t meant to see, and yet…. He shouldn’t have been drawn to either of them -thoughts of Stockholm Syndrome whirled around in his mind - and things were already complicated enough without dealing with... this .

    Now that he’d noticed, it was difficult to look away, though, and he resigned himself to taking a cold shower in the near future.

Chapter Text

"Shiro ended up on the observation deck again, but this time, Lotor found him and silently sat down next to him.

    “Couldn’t sleep?” Shiro asked finally.

    Lotor nodded. “I didn’t want to wake Sendak.”

    “Oh.”

    They sat in silence for a while longer, and finally Lotor spoke up. “What’s Earth like?”

    “I…” Shiro didn’t know if he should tell him. The Galra were the enemy, and whatever was going on with Lotor and Sendak and Shiro didn’t change that.

    “I don’t care about the de fenses, or fortifications, or how you conduct wars,” Lotor said softly. “I…I’ve always been interested in exploring new places, and I haven’t been able to for a while. But you don’t have to share, if you don’t want to.”

    “You won’t tell anyone else about it?” Shiro asked.

    “Not a word.”

    Shiro glanced at him. Lotor was still looking out at the stars, and his profile was limned in their light. He seemed contemplative, thoughtful, but not malicious. Not untrustworthy. Not deceitful.

    So… Shiro started talking. About the places he’d been -too few, he realized now, but he’d never really been interested in terrestrial travel -about the things he’d seen and done. About the food, the weather, the animals, anything he could think of.

    It felt good to just talk about home, even if he wasn’t sure he’d ever see it again, even if he wasn’t sure he wanted to.

    And Lotor just listened, not saying anything. His ears twitched now and then, flicking up or down in surprise or shock, or just attentiveness -Shiro didn’t know.

    Finally… Shiro got to the Garrison. He hadn’t meant to talk to Lotor about it, but it had been such a big part of his life that he just...couldn’t leave it out.

    “I think… I was selfish,” Shiro said finally. “And this was my punishment.”

    “ Selfish ,” Lotor repeated quietly. “Were you really selfish for pursuing your needs ahead of the wants of others?”

    Shiro blinked. “I… don’t know. But- If I had listened to Adam, and everyone else, I would still be on Earth, safe. Married by now, probably.”

    “You would have resented him eventually,” Lotor said. “Eventually, you would have asked yourself what it would have been like to go to space as you did, and part of you would always know that he was the reason you didn’t, and you would have resented him. And you wouldn’t have been safe . Whether you knew it or not, the Galra Empire would still be there.”

    Shiro sighed. “Yeah, I guess so. I just- I wish it could have been different.”

    “Thank you,” Lotor said, “for telling me about Earth. It sounds lovely, and perhaps… Perhaps one day, I might be able to visit.”

    “Maybe,” Shiro said. As long as it wasn’t part of a Galra invasion, then that would be… good, maybe.

    Shiro wasn’t entirely sure why, but he was overcome with a desire to- to kiss Lotor. He hadn’t really been touched in a friendly way in a year (that he could remember), and Lotor was helping him to imagine a future beyond this…

    He leaned over, gently cupping Lotor’s chin and turning his face until their lips met. Lotor froze for a second, but then melted into it, his arms coming up to wrap around Shiro’s shoulders.

    When the kiss ended, Lotor pressed their foreheads together. “I shouldn’t have done that,” he said quietly.

    Oh. Right. Of course. “Will Sendak be mad?”

    “What? No,” Lotor said. “Well, probably not. But I should have pushed you away. You don’t have to- to do this.”

    “Do what?”

    “Try to...seduce me, or whatever it is that you’re doing. I won’t run away with you. When the time comes, I’ll help you escape, but I won’t go with you.”

    “That’s not-“ Shiro blinked. “But you thought about it.”

    Lotor smiled wryly. “Of course I thought about it. This might be a gilded cage, compared to where I could be, but it’s still a cage. But if I left… Sendak would be punished.”

    “And you care about him.”

    Lotor shrugged. “We...have an arrangement. If I don’t uphold my end, how can I expect him to uphold his?”

    “If you escaped with me, you’d be out of his reach.”

    Lotor shook his head. “It’s not that simple. If I went with you, we’d both be hunted down until they found us. You have a better chance on your own.”

    That puzzled Shiro; why would they waste so many resources hunting down a couple of runaway slaves?

    Then, it occurred to him that Lotor hadn’t always been a slave. Maybe, whatever he’d been before…

    “Well, until then,” Shiro said, “you don’t have to push me away.”

    “I should have,” Lotor said. “I just… I didn’t want to.”

    “Oh,” Shiro said. “Can I-?”

    “Yes,” Lotor whispered.

    The interior walls of Sendak’s quarters were not soundproof- although the exterior walls were- which had led to some frustration on Shiro’s part more than once. Lotor was hot, and he was loud . He knew he probably shouldn’t be jacking off to his captors having sex, especially when he made out with one of them regularly, but jesus…

    Tonight, though, he was awoken by a piercing scream, decidedly not a sex noise (at least he hoped not), and something had him scrambling out of bed and towards the sound before he was even really aware of being awake.

    His thoughts caught up to him when he already through the doorway of their bedroom, and he just- stopped dead.

    He wasn’t sure what he’d expected, but this wasn’t it.

    Lotor was sobbing loudly, and Sendak held him, rubbing his back and murmuring softly to him, too softly for Shiro to make out the words, but-

    Lotor had his back to the door, but Sendak glanced up and met Shiro’s eyes, even in the dark, then said something to Lotor.

    Lotor nodded, just slightly, and Sendak gestured for Shiro to -come closer?

    Shiro hesitated, then tentatively stepped forward. And kept stepping forward, until he was sitting next to Sendak, carefully stroking Lotor’s hair. (It was so fine and soft, like nothing Shiro had ever felt.)

    Lotor quieted down somewhat, mostly just trembling now, still clinging tightly to Sendak.

    “What’s wrong?” Shiro asked softly.

    “He has nightmares,” Sendak explained. “They’re not usually this bad.”

    Oh. Well, Shiro could empathize with that. “Is there something I can do?”

    Sendak sighed. “I’m going to have to leave for a few days. If you could just- make sure he’s alright… He has a hard time going back to sleep on his own after- If it’s not too much trouble…”

    “No, it’s- I get it,” Shiro said quickly. Honestly, he didn’t mind; there were worse things, and frankly, he didn’t sleep so great himself. “I can do that.”

    Sendak seemed relieved. “Thank you.”

    Shiro still did not understand what their exact relationship was -sometimes he got the feeling that they didn’t either -but he didn’t think most Galra cared for their slaves this way.

    Lotor finally pushed himself away from Sendak’s chest and wiped his face. “‘M sorry for waking both of you.”

    Sendak and Shiro both started to tell him that he had nothing to apologize for, and then stopped and exchanged glances.

    “It’s alright, baby,” Sendak said, pressing a kiss to Lotor’s forehead. “Are you ready to go back to sleep? Or do you want someone to sit up with you?”

    “I… I don’t want to keep either of you up,” Lotor said. “You need sleep.”

    “So do you,” Sendak said softly, but firmly.

    “Can you both stay?” Lotor asked tentatively.

    “That’s up to Shiro,” Sendak said, glancing at Shiro.

    This was the most comfortable bed Shiro had ever been in. “I don’t mind.”

Chapter Text

Lotor woke slowly, reluctantly. He was still tired, but he was comfortable and safe.

    It was early enough that Sendak wasn’t up yet, and Shiro was still asleep on his other side, and it was just-

    If he could stay in this half-asleep moment forever…

    Shiro rolled over in his sleep, pressing himself against Lotor’s back, and…

    He was hard.

    Lotor wasn’t sure what to do about it. He hadn’t forgotten about the night Shiro had fucked him while drugged beyond reason; it had been too good to forget. And he wouldn’t mind a sober repeat.

    He didn’t think Sendak would, either; he had his own interest in Shiro, and he couldn’t hide it from Lotor.

    But it wasn’t that simple. Maybe it could be, but things were rarely simple. He had the feeling that even this arrangement he had with Sendak wasn’t so simple anymore, and he didn’t know why. Adding a third person would only complicate matters further.

    Lotor sighed. He didn’t want Shiro to stop grinding against his ass, even if he was sound asleep, but…

    It was never really about what he wanted, and hadn’t been for a long time.

    “Shiro,” he said quietly. He would have rolled over to face him, but he had a very muscular human on one side and a very large Galra on the other, which made it difficult to maneuver. (If circumstances were different, he could have died happy here, just like this.)

    Shiro didn’t wake, so he tried again, louder. “Shiro!”

    Shiro flinched. “Mm?”

    “Having pleasant dreams?” Lotor asked, deliberately pushing back a little against Shiro’s cock.

    “ Fuck ,” Shiro gasped. “Shit, I’m so sorry. It- sometimes -it doesn’t mean anything, it’s physiological-“

    “Don’t worry about it,” Lotor said.

    Shiro pushed himself away, as far away as he could get and not fall off the bed. Lotor rolled over and faced Shiro, now that he had the room to do so.

    “I know better than anyone that this isn’t a perfect place to be,” Lotor said softly. “I’ve been here longer than you can imagine. And it’s… It’s still not freedom, even if it feels like it sometimes, compared to what we could have. That being said… There’s no reason to make it more complicated than it has to be.”

    “What do you mean by that?” Shiro asked.

    “I mean…” What did he mean? “Whatever we have now stays here. When it’s over, then it’s over, and we’ll all go our separate ways. Until then, if we must be stuck here together...why not make the most of it?”

    Shiro laughed softly. “Well, I’m not a monk.”

    “I don’t know what that means.”

    “Do you know how long it’s been since I had sex that I actually wanted to have?”

    “Too long, I’m guessing,” Lotor said.

    “Yeah,” Shiro said, rubbing the back of his neck.

    Lotor was about to say something, but then Sendak’s arm tightened a little around his waist.

    “Good morning,” Lotor said.

    “I must have overslept, if you’re awake,” Sendak teased, his voice still sleep-rough, nuzzling Lotor’s shoulder lazily.

    “It’s early,” Lotor informed him. “Early enough, anyway.”

    Sendak laughed softly, his breath tickling the back of Lotor’s neck. “So Haxus is going to tell me off again for being late. Wonderful.”

    “You’re the commander,” Lotor reminded him.

    “I have to set a ‘good example’,” Sendak replied, “or whatever it is that Haxus always yammers on about.” He sighed. “And I‘m leaving today. Is that why you’re up early? So you can kiss me goodbye?”

    “How dare you accuse me of such sentimentality,” Lotor said.

    “You’re right. Forgive me,” Sendak said. He sighed again and dragged himself out of bed. “Good morning to you, too, Shiro.”

    “Morning,” Shiro said quietly.

    Sendak left to get ready for the day, and Lotor wrapped the blankets around himself a little more firmly; Sendak was always so warm, and that was the main reason Lotor slept with him. Ships were so fucking cold all the time.

    “What was that about?” Shiro asked, frowning thoughtfully.

    “What?”

    “Just… do you guys do that every morning?”

    “Do what ?” Lotor asked, a little irritated. It was too early for this.

    Shiro shrugged. “You know. The...banter.”

    Lotor scowled. “Is there a problem?”

    Shiro paused, then smiled knowingly. “You know what? Never mind. Why’s Sendak leaving?”

    “Accepting a surrender,” Lotor said. “It’ll take a few days, but it’s still technically a war zone, so we’ll have to stay here.”

    “...ok.”

    He didn’t say anything else for a few minutes, while Lotor worked up the energy to get up.

    Just as Lotor was about to haul himself up -why were mornings so difficult ? - Shiro finally spoke again: “How is this going to work?”

    “This?”

    Shiro shrugged again and- why was he being so cagey? “You propositioned me.”

    “You humped me in your sleep,” Lotor pointed out.

    “And I told you that was an accident. But I mean… This won’t cause problems between you and Sendak, will it? I don’t need to be thrown back into the arena because he’s jealous or whatever.”

    “You wouldn’t be thrown to back into the arena,” Lotor said. “If this doesn’t work out, your next stop is the Druids’ lab.”

    “Great,” Shiro said sarcastically. “Of course you’re going to get semantic on me now.”

    “Galra aren’t naturally monogamous,” Lotor said. “And the only problem Sendak is going to have with this will be deciding who he’s more jealous of: you...or me.” With that, he rolled on top of Shiro, pinning him down and straddling his waist.

    Shiro flushed, bright red and gorgeous. He was still half-hard; Lotor ground down a little, drawing a choked-off gasp out of him.

    Lotor smirked. “I want to ride you,” he murmured, low and deep, teasing and yet completely serious.

    Gods above , it had been centuries since he’d fucked someone other than Sendak.

    Shiro swallowed hard and nodded.

    “Good,” Lotor said, leaning down to kiss him. It was probably too sloppy and filthy, for the early hour, but Lotor didn’t care.

    In moments, he had Shiro trying to buck up against him, moaning into the kiss, fully hard once more, and that was the only power Lotor had exercised for years , and it felt good.

    It felt good to know that, at least for now, there were two people who wanted him, even if they only wanted him for this. It was something . More than anything he’d ever had before.

    Lotor reached for the lube with one hand and freed Shiro’s cock with the other. He didn’t particularly care to draw this out -not this early in the morning - and anyway, he was still open enough from last night that all he really needed to do was slick Shiro’s cock up before he could sink down on it.

    It was better than Lotor had anticipated. Shiro’s cock - presumably like all humans’ -was thick from the start, unlike Galra cocks, which were tapered. As such…

    Lotor had never felt split open like this before, and he loved it immediately. The lack of ridges aside, it was perfect .

    “ Fuck ,” Shiro groaned. “You just get right to it, don’t you?” His hands settled on Lotor’s waist, not pulling or urging, just resting.

    “Why wait?” Lotor asked. He rolled his hips and fought to breathe as Shiro’s cock managed to stimulate what seemed liked every sensitive place inside him.

    Shiro was… attractive. Not Galra, but Lotor had other tastes, and Shiro seemed to meet them perfectly.

    Breathless and disheveled and falling apart underneath Lotor…

    Lotor started when a hand trailed down his back. His eyes wouldn’t quite focus when he looked, but it was only Sendak, of course.

    Shiro gripped his hips a little tighter, possessively, defiantly, but Sendak only hummed in satisfaction. “Of course you want to keep him to yourself,” he murmured to Shiro. “He’s so good at everything he does.”

    Lotor arched into Sendak’s touch, trying to stop the moan bubbling out of his throat.

    “Unfortunately,” Sendak continued, “despite the circumstances we find ourselves in...he can’t be owned. Only temporarily possessed.” He rested his chin on Lotor’s shoulder, his arm wrapping around his waist and his hand around his cock, stroking gently.

    Lotor turned to try to kiss him, but the angle wasn’t right, and all he could do was reach back to try to bring Sendak closer, reach down to try to anchor himself with a hand splayed across Shiro’s chest.

    It didn’t quite work, not in the face of this . He came, hard, beyond words and reason.

    Shiro hadn’t come yet, but Sendak simply murmured soft encouragements to Lotor, urging him on, until Shiro finally spilled inside him.

    Without Sendak, Lotor would have collapsed on Shiro’s chest; as it was, he trembled all over, panting and blissed out.

    “Now I don’t want to leave,” Sendak said, nipping Lotor’s ear gently. “Save some for me when I get back, alright, baby?”

    Lotor nodded, still a little dazed, but he panicked when Sendak stood and moved away. “Wait!”

    Sendak paused. “I have to go, Lotor.”

    “I know,” Lotor said, clambering out of Shiro’s lap, wincing a little as his cock slipped free. He wasn’t sure how he managed to stand, when his legs felt so liquid, but he did.

    He inspected Sendak’s uniform carefully, as he did whenever Sendak left to do something dangerous. It was foolish, but some part of him felt that if he didn’t, he was inviting trouble, and he couldn’t risk that.

    After a few minute adjustments, he stood on the tips of his toes to kiss Sendak’s cheek. “Be careful.”

    “I’m always careful,” Sendak said.

    Lotor scowled, and Sendak laughed.

    “I’ll be back in a few days.” He glanced between Lotor and Shiro suggestively. “You gave me several excellent reasons to return.”

    “You better,” Lotor huffed.

    Sendak picked him up, leaving his feet dangling as he kissed him and carried him back to bed. “I will. Don’t worry about me.”

    “I’m not worried,” Lotor insisted.

    Sendak just smirked. “Alright, baby. Take care of him for me,” he said, looking past Lotor to Shiro.

    Shiro nodded. “If he doesn’t kill me first.”

    Sendak laughed. “Good luck with that. Now, I really do have to go, before Haxus comes looking for me.”

    He left, and Lotor flopped on the bed next to Shiro.

    “Damn,” Shiro said. “He’s got it bad for you.”

    “Don’t be ridiculous,” Lotor said.

Chapter Text

Lotor sighed in frustration and hauled himself up, looking around for his clothes. His partner for the evening was asleep already, but Lotor knew from experience that he wasn’t welcome to stay the night.

    That was fine; he didn’t particularly want to, when he could sleep in his own bed, away from this Lieutenant’s untidy rooms and the stench of sex.

    He made sure to account for every garment as he dressed; the sex had been rather disappointing, and he did not intend to return.

    No matter; there were others with whom he could entertain himself.

    He exited the Lieutenant’s quarters as quietly as possible, though it was the middle of the night and only sentries were likely to be roaming the halls right now.

    He’d almost made it back to his own quarters when he quite literally ran into someone. His own fault; he’d been too intent on returning to his bed so he could get off properly. He didn’t know why he continued with these little liaisons, when they always ended in frustration and disappointment.

    He looked at the person he’d run into, not expecting an apology (as he never got one anyway). “Lieutenant Sendak.”

    Lieutenant Sendak bowed. “My apologies, Your Highness. I didn’t- I wasn’t-“

    Lotor waved a hand; he was fairly certain it was his fault this time, and anyway, he didn’t particularly care. People had done much worse to him on purpose. And they never apologized. “What are you doing out and about so late, Lieutenant?”

    As far as he knew, Sendak had an early morning session in the training pits with Zarkon -an honor Lotor had never been afforded -and he ought to have been in bed by now.

    Not that Lotor cared.

    Sendak’s crest stood up. “I…”

    Lotor’s interest was piqued. It was difficult to imagine the strait-laced Lieutenant doing anything that would make him this flustered. “Well?”

    “I wanted some extra time in the training pits,” Sendak said, “and this was the only time I could…”

    Disappointing. “Is that all?” Lotor huffed, making to turn away.

    It struck him, suddenly, that Sendak’s rooms weren’t in this wing; despite Zarkon’s favoritism, Sendak was still quartered with the other lieutenants. He stopped. “What are you doing here?” He demanded.

    If possible, Sendak got even more flustered. “I- I...came to speak to you, but you weren’t in your quarters, Your Highness.”

    Of course not; he’d been busy having unsatisfying sex. He hummed noncommittally, although… Why would Sendak seek him out for anything? Nobody wanted to speak to Lotor (unless he screwed up somehow) and frankly, that was how he liked it. “Excuse me,” he said finally, “it’s late and I have to- go.”

    Sendak caught his wrist before he got very far. “I’ve heard all sorts of rumors about you,” he said. “And seeing you out this late, looking as disheveled as you are, I have to wonder…”

    Lotor snatched his wrist back. “If you’re going to call me a whore, just get on with it, alright? You don’t have to dance around the subject; the gods know no one else does.”

    Sendak made a disgruntled sound deep in the back of his throat. “You are their prince. They should respect you.”

    “‘Respect’ was not the point of those encounters,” Lotor said wryly. “What do you want, Lieutenant?”

    Sendak didn’t say anything for a long moment, then just shook his head. “Nothing. My apologies for keeping you, Your Highness.”

    He turned on his heel and left, and Lotor just watched him go, confused.

    By the time he got back to his quarters, he was still half-hard, and if he got himself off to thoughts of Lieutenant Sendak worshipping him… Well, it wasn’t like anyone would ever find out.

    Lotor’s attraction for the Lieutenant was rather inconvenient, but he assumed that, as with all the other attractions he’d harbored over the years, it would fade after a couple of sessions of mediocre sex.

    So he went to Sendak’s quarters one evening.

    Sendak answered the door wearing nothing but a towel around his waist, perhaps fresh from the shower.

    Lotor almost  forgot why he was there. “Lieutenant,” he managed finally, “I hope I’m not interrupting anything?”

    “Um, no, of course not, Your Highness.” He paused, a little awkwardly. “Would you like to come in while I- dress?”

    Lotor bit his lip, but ducked into the room. “That won’t be necessary,” he murmured, unable to look away from the V of Sendak’s hips.

    Sendak made a strangled sound. “Are- are you propositioning me?”

    Lotor finally ripped his eyes away and looked up at his face. “Perhaps. If I was, would you accept?”

    Sendak swallowed hard. “I probably shouldn’t but- yes. I would.”

    Lotor smiled, and stepped a little closer. “What’s the harm? It’s just a bit of fun.”

    He was not prepared for the way Sendak pressed him back against the door (fortunately closed once more), kissing him breathlessly, bruisingly.

    It was perfect.

    It was better when Sendak asked him before working his flightsuit down, waiting for his nod patiently before going any further. It was such a small thing, and yet-

    It didn’t matter. None of it mattered. This wouldn’t last. It never did.

    He almost choked on his own tongue when Sendak sank to his knees in front of him, licking hot stripes over the crest of Lotor’s hip, nuzzling his belly a little (just above where he really wanted contact), moaning in appreciation as he firmly ran his hands over Lotor’s thighs and ass.

    It was a wholly new experience for Lotor. And he could not truthfully say that he wasn’t immediately enamored by it.

    It was just so nice to have someone even pretend that he was desirable…

    Some part of him knew that, for his own sake, he should have left right then and there.

    He didn’t. He only buried his hands in Sendak’s crest, needing to hold onto something as Sendak finally took his cock into his mouth.

    It was very late by the time Lotor gathered the energy to push himself upright and begin the process of finding his clothes.

    For once, he wasn’t in a rush to leave. His bones felt liquid, and he couldn’t remember ever being this relaxed before. Oh, sure, he was sore (and probably would be for a few days, although that thought was more arousing than he cared to admit), but it was...nice.

    He’d never felt this good after sex, and he certainly didn’t feel the need to go take care of himself this time.

    Sendak pulled him back down into the sheets. “Where are you going?”

    “Back to my quarters,” Lotor said. Where else would he go at this hour?

    “You don’t have to,” Sendak said. “Stay, if you want.”

    He should have run at that.

    He didn’t.

    He only allowed Sendak to drape an arm over his waist as he fell asleep, and he found it surprisingly easy to follow him into slumber.

Chapter Text

Sendak did not enjoy this part of his job very much. There was no honor in it, no contest of wills, no special skill needed, nothing to be tested. 

    Some primeval part of him was viscerally pleased at the victory this sort of thing implied, but it was dampened by the dull ceremony and raw fear of the surrendering party.

    He had not kept track of how many planets he’d conquered in the name of the Galra Empire; it had been many, and he’d conquer many more before his life was over. That was all that mattered. 

    All that should matter.

    Still, whether he enjoyed it or not, this was an important part of his job, so he’d do it without complaint, and he’d do it well. 

    And he really didn’t need to do much of anything. Haxus handled most of details, and all he really needed to do was be present and accept the surrender. 

    (He wished Lotor was here, honestly; he tended to make even the dullest functions more interesting with his barely-audible scathing remarks.) 

    On the third and final day of the ceremonies, just as the final agreements came to a close, something caught his attention. A tremor in the air, perhaps… Something that was out of place, something that raised his hackles.

    He had the barest instance to analyze it before the explosive device detonated. 

    It had been poorly constructed, and he was spared the full force of it. Haxus, who had been standing off to one side behind him, had been shielded completely. Some of the Sentries were destroyed, but they could be replaced. 

    The hall was eerily silent.

    It was only when Haxus touched his arm to get his attention, lips moving but no words coming out, that he realized the bomb had affected his hearing.

    He reached up to one ear, and blood came away on his fingers.

    (And now he could only be glad that Lotor wasn’t here; he couldn’t imagine what he might have done if-)

    “Clear the hall and secure our ship,” Sendak said, hoping he was speaking loudly enough for Haxus to hear. 

    Haxus nodded and began ordering Sentries around.

    Sendak was hit with a sudden wave of dizziness, and it was all he could do to keep upright. Now was not the time to show weakness.

    “Find out who did this,” Sendak said. “I don’t want this sort of stunt pulled again.”

    Haxus nodded again, and said something. Sendak had no idea what; he couldn’t read lips.

    Haxus frowned, then gestured to his ears, then Sendak, then pointed upwards.

    “No, I do not need medical attention,” Sendak said. 

    Haxus just gave him a look. 

    Another wave of dizziness broke over Sendak; this time he would have gone down if not for Haxus’s reflexes. 

    Haxus gave him another look - an “I told you so” look -and gestured for two Sentries to escort Sendak to their transport. 

    Sendak grumbled a little, but finally gave in. “Keep me apprised,” he ordered.

    Haxus saluted, fist over heart.

    Shiro looked up as Lotor cursed and raced out of the room.

    Confused, Shiro followed him -to the infirmary?

    “You idiot!” Lotor shouted, disregarding the Sentries helping Sendak sit on the cot. “I told you to be careful!”

    “I was,” Sendak said. He waved away the Sentries, but held still as the doctor began examining him. 

    “Not careful enough,” Lotor hissed.

    “It’s not even serious,” Sendak said.

    “Sir, you have a concussion, and several lacerations that will need to be stitched up,” the doctor said. “Fortunately, emergency intervention saved your hearing, but I’m recommending bedrest for several days.”

    Lotor made a noise of disgust, throwing his hands up, and left without a word.

    Shiro was torn between following him, or staying to find out what had happened. 

    Sendak closed his eye and sighed, letting the doctor guide him onto his back. “It’s best if you wait for him to cool off first,” Sendak said. “He won’t admit it, but he does have a bit of a temper sometimes.”

    “Yeah,” Shiro said, just to acknowledge Sendak’s advice. Sendak would know better than him, after all.

    “Was he alright?” Sendak asked. 

    “Mostly,” Shiro said. “A few nightmares, but I guess nothing out of the ordinary?”

    Sendak’s ears flicked. “Sounds about right.” He sounded...tired, exhausted. Bone-weary.

    The room descended into silence for a few minutes, while the doctor cleaned and stitched up the lacerations littering Sendak’s body, aside from hisses and grunts from Sendak.

    “What happened?” Shiro asked finally.

    “Insurgents,” Sendak said. “Nothing major. Haxus will deal with it.”

    “I thought this planet surrendered?”

    “The government did,” Sendak said. “Not all of the citizenry agreed. It’s not unusual.”

    “Yeah, I guess not,” Shiro said. Knowing what he did of the Galra Empire… He would have fought, too, rather than give in and become a slave, or worse. “What will happen to them?”

    “The insurgency will be put down,” Sendak said. “As for the people of this planet… It’s out of my control. My fleet isn’t equipped for occupation. We’ll be out conquering another system before the week is out.”

    “So someone else will…what, come in and govern?”

    “Mmm,” Sendak hummed in agreement. “We all have our roles.”

    The doctor finished and tidied up. “You should rest, Sir.”

    Sendak nodded, and sighed. “Go find Lotor,” he told Shiro. “Tell him I’m alright.” His mouth curved into a faint smile. “If he’s not on the training deck, he’ll be on the observation deck.”

    “Ok,” Shiro said. “Thanks.” 

    Lotor didn’t turn as someone approached from behind; the footsteps were too light to be anyone but Shiro. 

    He rubbed his cheek against the top of Kova’s head.

    “You have a cat?” Shiro asked. 

    “He’s shy,” Lotor said. “He doesn’t like meeting new people.”

    “Oh.” Shiro said down nearby. 

    He didn’t say anything for a while, just stared out at the stars, like Lotor was. “Are you alright?”

    Lotor shrugged. “I guess.”

    “Sendak’s alright.”

    “I know.”

    Shiro paused. “You seemed upset,” he said finally.

    “He could have ruined everything,” Lotor said. “Getting killed by some incompetent rebels.”

    “He’s fine,” Shiro said.

    “He won’t be every time,” Lotor said. “And then what? Do you know what will happen to us then?”

    Shiro swallowed. “No,” he said carefully. 

    “You’ll probably be sent back to the arena, if you’re lucky,” Lotor said. “But it’ll probably be the witch’s laboratory, and that’s not a fate I would wish on anyone.”

    “No,” Shiro said, shuddering. “No, but I could… Maybe we could…”

    “I wouldn’t count on it,” Lotor said. “Not both of us, together. My father would-“

    “Your father?” Shiro asked, startled. 

    Lotor froze. He’d said too much, he hadn’t been careful enough. He didn’t want Shiro to know about...any of that. But he didn’t know what else to say. 

    “What about your father?” Shiro asked again, when Lotor didn’t say anything.

    “Nothing,” Lotor said, rising with Kova still in his arms. “Nothing at all.” 

    He wasn’t proud of it, but he fled again.

    Sometimes… It seemed like that was the only thing he was good at. 

Chapter Text

Sendak made a quick recovery. He hadn’t been too worried about it.

    Lotor, on the other hand…

    He’d been avoiding everyone lately, even Shiro, and if he didn’t want to be found, he wouldn’t be; he’d spent hours upon hours pouring over the schematics of this ship, and he knew it better than anyone. 

    Lotor’s absence had Shiro on-edge; he didn’t know that this was...not normal, exactly, but not something one needed to be too concerned about. Lotor would come back when he was ready, and not a moment sooner. 

    He relayed as much to Shiro, one day while he was trying to do some work on his tablet while on bedrest. 

    “Will he be alright?” Shiro asked.

    “In time,” Sendak replied. As alright as he ever was, at any rate. “He just needs his space sometimes.” 

    “Yeah,” Shiro said quietly. “He...mentioned his father. Is there- history there?”

    History . That was definitely one word for it. “What did he say, exactly?” Sendak asked carefully. 

    Shiro shrugged. “He implied that if we...escaped? Ran away? That his father would send people after us. Or, him, I guess.”

    “It’s not my place to speak on it,” Sendak said, “if he didn’t tell you more than that.” 

    “But…” Shiro frowned. “What kind of father would allow their kid to be a slave? I mean, I know that you two have your arrangement, but I assume no one else knows, so for all he knows, you’re…”

    Sendak sighed. “Lotor’s father is… not a nice man.” Huge understatement. “It’s complicated.”

    “But-“

    “I won’t speak to you on this any further,” Sendak said. “If you want to know more, you’ll have to ask Lotor.”

    “He’s not going to tell me,” Shiro said. “He doesn’t want me to know about it, I guess.”

    It all made sense then to Sendak. 

    Of course Lotor didn’t want Shiro to know. Shiro was the only person in his life who didn’t know that he was Zarkon’s son. The only person who didn’t know that he was a prince fallen from grace, humiliated and trapped here. He could be...more himself with Shiro than anyone else.

    Of course he didn’t want that to end. 

    “It…It’s not important,” Sendak said. “It’s in the past. As long as I’m here-“

    “That’s why he’s upset,” Shiro said. “He’s worried about… that, I guess. What would happen if you weren’t.”

    “I know,” Sendak said gently. He was the only thing standing between Lotor and his father, after all. “But I’m not going anywhere.”

    “You do dangerous work,” Shiro pointed out. 

    And...well, Sendak couldn’t deny that. “If something happens… Take care of him, will you? He’s… He doesn’t do well on his own.” 

    Shiro’s expression softened considerably. “I will.” 

    Sendak couldn’t quell the wave of relief and gratitude that washed over him at that. “Thank you.”

    Shiro smiled softly, and looked about to say something, but instead he just shook his head. “I should let you rest, or work, or...whatever.” 

    “That night I was brought to you,” Shiro said slowly, nervously, “when I was drugged… What happened?”

    Sendak paused in cleaning his armor -a nightly habit of his, even if he hadn’t worn it while on bedrest -before finally asking, “Do you really want to know?”

    “No,” Shiro admitted. “But- I- There are so many secrets here, so many things I don’t know, and I think I need to know them, and this is… This is something I at least have a right to know.” 

    “Lotor’s secrets are-“

    “We’re not talking about Lotor!” Shiro snapped. “Tell me what happened!”

    Sendak sighed and stood, putting each piece of his armor back in its place. Shiro had the sense that he was stalling.

    Shiro was patient, though, and he just waited, perched on the edge of the bed, trying not to show how unsettled he was. 

    (He really didn’t want to know, after all, but whatever had happened was surely not as bad as what his imagination conjured up.) 

    “You had a bad reaction to the drugs they gave you,” Sendak began carefully. “Possibly an overdose? I’m not sure. It made you…”

    Uncontrollable. Feral. Hungry . 

    Shiro did remember that part. Some of it. Enough of it. ”I pushed Lotor down and…”

    Sendak nodded. “I would have stopped you, except that Lotor was obviously enjoying himself. He says I’m not rough enough with him sometimes.”

    Shiro blushed, a little horrified that he’d done such a thing, and that Lotor had liked it. 

    He’d had sex with Lotor a few times while Sendak was off-ship, but…

    Well, this was… different. Actually doing it was not the same as talking about it, with someone else, no less.

    And… God, Sendak had watched . 

    “Besides, you might have hurt him, or yourself, if I had tried to interfere. You weren’t… in your right mind.”

    “No,” Shiro said. “I’d never… I wouldn’t want to hurt him.”

    “I know,” Sendak said. “He told me not to stop you, anyway. We wanted to help you, and the only way to do that was to let the drug run its course, whatever else happened.”

    “He would have let me hurt him?” Shiro asked, horrified.

    “He… has a self-sacrificing streak,” Sendak said slowly. “He doesn’t really let anyone see it -he tries to disguise it as hedonism or convenience -but it’s there. He really is the best man I’ve ever known, despite everything.”

    “Or maybe because of it,” Shiro pointed out.

    “Maybe,” Sendak said doubtfully. He shook his head. “You didn’t want to talk about Lotor.”

    Shiro laughed a little, startled. “Everything seems to come back to him, anyway.”

    “Mm,” Sendak agreed. “If not for him…” He shook his head again. “All that ended up happening that night was that we took turns with you until you passed out. Nothing more than that. Not ideal, I know, but given the circumstances… I do not ask you to forgive me, but I hope you’ll at least understand .” 

    “I...do,” Shiro said slowly. “Just to clarify, you fucked me, right?”

    “Yes.” 

    And… Shiro knew he shouldn’t feel like this, but… “Would you mind, maybe, if we… while I’m not drugged?”

    Sendak was clearly shocked by the suggestion, his ears and crest standing upright. “Shiro, that’s not- you don’t owe me anything, especially not that, and I don’t think-“

    “It’s not about owing you anything,” Shiro said. “Just, if I wanted to, and you wanted to, and we were both sober, then…”

    “Shiro…” Sendak sighed. “It’s not a good idea.”

    “I know,” Shiro said. “But I- I want to know what it’s like, when I’m myself. I think… I think it might be good, to have something to replace those... memories .” 

            Not just the scattered, disjointed memories from that night, but also all the other memories, of other Galra who weren’t… who had… At least if this was something he chose, then it would be...different. Maybe not better, but-

    “I will...consider it,” Sendak said after a long moment. “But not tonight. It’s late.” 

    “Ok,” Shiro said. And things were...different, with Lotor still MIA, but they still laid down in the same bed and fell asleep together. 

Chapter Text

Lotor was back the next morning, as if nothing had happened, having crawled between Sendak and Shiro sometime during the night.

    Shiro wasn’t sure how he’d slept through that -he wasn’t a heavy sleeper anymore, and surely Lotor climbing into bed should have woken him -but he was mostly just happy to have Lotor back. 

    It just wasn’t the same without him.

    Sendak was full-on spooning Lotor, his nose firmly pressed against Lotor’s throat and his arm around Lotor’s waist, as if to keep him from leaving again. 

    They were both still sound asleep.

    Shiro still wasn’t sure what the exact nature of their relationship was -perhaps it was something as alien as they were -but he doubted he’d ever find out at this rate. Not if they kept lying to themselves and each other about how they felt. 

    It was just...complicated. And it was made even more complicated by Shiro’s own developing feelings.

    It would be best if he remained unattached and distant, but-

    They’d been so kind and good to him. 

    He’d been alone for so long, even before Kerberos, but this last year in the Arena had made him fully aware of how unfulfilling life on Earth had been. Would be, if he ever got back; they’d never let him fly again, and he had nothing and no one else waiting for him. 

    The thought occurred to him that this was the best his life had been in years . 

    It shocked him wide awake, made him sit bolt upright, hands raking through his hair.

    That couldn’t be right . 

    It was absurd . 

    He had to be losing his mind -developing Stockholm syndrome -something . 

    The Galra had captured his crew and enslaved them. Probably sent them to their deaths. They’d enslaved him. Forced him to fight and kill for their entertainment. Tortured and experimented on him. Drugged him and whored him out.

    He couldn’t like living among them. 

    Sendak might be nice , but he was still part of the Empire. He was still conquering planets, enslaving entire peoples. Maybe he didn’t rule directly over those planets, but he was still complicit. 

    ...had Lotor been complicit once, too? What had he done for his own father to make him a slave? 

    ...had it been worse than anything Sendak had done, or had Lotor refused to go that far? Maybe it had been his refusal-

    “Shiro,” Lotor murmured sleepily, reaching out for him. “Come back.”

    He couldn’t do that, but he couldn’t- he had to pretend everything was fine; he couldn’t have them ask him about it, have them go after him. “Go back to sleep,” he murmured, stroking Lotor’s hair back from his face. “It’s alright.”

    Lotor seemed to accept that; he closed his eyes, and his breathing evened back out.

    It was hard, just leaving like that, but… Wasn’t that why he had to leave? It would only get harder the longer he waited.

    Sendak woke slowly. Lotor’s presence was normal, expected, like he hadn’t been MIA for the past week.

    It was always like that: he’d get upset about something and disappear, and when he decided he was over it, he’d return like nothing had happened.

    They’d never been friends, before, but these last centuries had brought them closer than ever.

    Just…not close enough for Lotor to actually talk about his feelings.

    Would that have changed, if things were different? If Lotor wasn’t his slave, but his lover in truth? 

    It didn’t matter; that would never happen now. Once Lotor was truly free, he’d run as far and as fast as he could, and Sendak would never see him again.

    He’d let Lotor go, though, even if it killed him. 

    As he woke further -and put useless fancies aside -Sendak realized that while Lotor might be in his customary position (curled up, pressed close to Sendak, his head on Sendak’s chest and Sendak’s arm draped over him), Shiro was missing.

    It was unusual -he tended to wake early, but not earlier than Sendak, and even if he woke first, he usually stayed in bed until Lotor woke up.

    (It was nice that Lotor had someone else he felt close to now, someone without the past they had together. Maybe… maybe when it was over, when Lotor ran off to the far ends of the universe, he wouldn’t do so alone .) 

    There were no other sounds in the quarters -no water running in the bathroom, no doors opening, no footsteps -so Shiro must have left entirely.

    Not unusual, either, exactly, especially now that Lotor had shown him how to get around the ship without getting lost or being accosted by Sendak’s crew. (They wouldn’t do anything -they knew better -but Shiro was uneasy around most Galra, and with good reason.)

    It was just… early , and in Lotor’s absence, he’d developed a better understanding of Shiro, and…

    It did not feel like betrayal. Shiro owed him nothing . 

    Besides, it would feel a million times worse once Lotor left, too.

    He thought about getting up and looking for Shiro, just to make sure he was alright. It was nearly time for him to start his day, anyway.

    But… This was the first morning he’d woken up with Lotor in his arms in weeks, and he didn’t want to disturb Lotor’s slumber by moving, and he wanted to savor every moment he had with Lotor because eventually this would come to an end. 

    Lotor looked so peaceful when he slept, beautiful and unburdened and soft. If only there were some way to have him be at peace like this all the time.

    Sendak wanted to make that happen, but… How could he? 

    He was still ruminating about it when Lotor stirred awake, pressing himself back into Sendak’s embrace, humming a little in almost-contentment. 

    “Good morning,” Sendak said. 

    “Mm,” Lotor said, not fully awake yet. It could take some time for him to be fully awake and aware, if he was allowed to wake on his own.

    Sendak liked these quiet, sleepy moments more than he could ever admit. He adored the weight of Lotor’s warm body in his arms, and this was really the only time he could do so without the expectation of sex.

    (Not that Sendak didn’t like having sex with Lotor, but he wanted real intimacy, too, and the sex they had…wasn’t that.)

    “Where’s Shiro?” Lotor asked quietly.

    “I don’t know,” Sendak admitted. 

    “Oh,” Lotor said. And then he turned over, so he could face Sendak. He reached up, tracing the scars on Sendak’s face, around his bionic eye. “I’m sorry.”

    “You don’t need to be sorry,” Sendak said. “You didn’t-“

    “I care about you,” Lotor said. “The prospect of losing you was too much for me.”

    “You’re not going to lose me.”

    Lotor didn’t say anything, but his brow creased and his mouth opened, as if he wanted to say something.

    Maybe, “You can’t promise that.”

    Or, “One day I will.”

    Or, “I won’t lose you, but you’ll lose me, and it’s the same end result.” 

    Finally, Lotor just sat up and turned away. “It’s getting late, Commander.”

    Sendak barely kept himself from reaching for him. “Lotor…”

    “I’m going to see if I can find Shiro and make sure he’s alright .”

    And then he was gone. 

Chapter Text

Lotor found Shiro alone on the observation deck. His shoulders were tense, and though his back was turned to Lotor, Lotor was sure his expression was just as tense.

    “Shiro,” Lotor said, announcing his presence. He could understand Shiro’s dislike of being startled.

    Shiro’s shoulders only grew tenser. He didn’t say anything, and hesitantly, Lotor joined him at the railing.

    Neither of them said anything for a long while. It was not the companionable silence they’d shared before; this was cold and distant and…

    “Is something wrong?” Lotor asked quietly, as the storm between them only seemed to build. He hated this tension; it reminded him too much of his childhood, of always trying to guess why his father hated him. 

    The railing under Shiro’s prosthetic hand creaked and crumpled in his grasp. “Is something wrong,” Shiro repeated flatly. “Is that the road you really want to go down?”

    “Shiro,” Lotor said. He should leave -he wanted to leave -but it had never been an option then, and it was not an option now. 

    “My friends are probably dead,” Shiro hissed, “and I’m here, developing fucking Stockholm syndrome for the people that killed them, and you want to ask me if something’s wrong ?”

    “Shiro-“

    “I asked Sendak to fuck me,” Shiro said. “While you were off sulking. I actually asked the man who raped me to fuck me again. How fucked up is that?”

    “We were only trying to help you,” Lotor said.

    “Were you? How do I know you didn’t purposefully put me in that position? Drug me up, then swoop in to ‘save’ me.” He laughed bitterly. “The thing is, it almost worked. I wanted to believe that you would save me. I wanted to be saved so much, that I- You are a monster . The worst kind of monster. Maybe this is the fate you deserve.”

    “No one deserves this,” Lotor said, stung. Shiro had never been so cruel before, and it was so unexpected from him , of all people… “Shiro, please, you must believe me-“

    “Must I?” Shiro growled, and then, so quickly that Lotor was unable to prevent it, he slammed Lotor into the wall, his prosthetic hand on his throat, pinning him in place.

    Lotor tried to draw breath, struggling against him, but Shiro only tightened his grip, even as Lotor tried to claw his hand away. Maybe, in other circumstances, Lotor could have escaped his grasp, but he had been disarmed by Shiro’s presence; he’d thought that Shiro would never hurt him. 

    He’d trusted Shiro.

    Now there was only panic and betrayal. He was going to die here, like this, his almost-lover’s hand on his throat, and there was nothing he could do to stop it.

    Maybe this was the fate he deserved. 

    “Shiro-“ he tried, with the last of his breath, his vision blurring and graying. He wasn’t sure what he was going to say -maybe he’d meant to apologize, or plead for mercy, or-

    Shiro let go abruptly, and Lotor crumpled, too weak to stand, violently gasping for air. His throat ached with every breath, his heart and head were pounding, and somehow everything hurt.

    He managed to look up at Shiro.

    Shiro looked horrified, pale as a sheet, and he didn’t say anything as he backed away, slowly at first, before turning and near-sprinting away.

    Lotor let his head fall back against the wall behind him as he tried to regulate his breathing, one deep breath in, one slow breath out.

    He wasn’t entirely sure what had just happened. He knew it was not a dream; in his dreams, Shiro would have kept going until Lotor screamed himself awake. 

    He’d trusted Shiro,  more than anyone except Sendak. 

    Lotor tried to rise, and found himself to be too weak, and still shaking too hard, to manage.

    Gingerly, he touched his throat; the flesh felt swollen and bruised already. Sendak would surely see the handprint; there would be no way to hide it, as he could barely stand his own touch against the damaged area.

    He didn’t know what Sendak would do, once he found out. Months ago, at the beginning of this, Sendak would have followed up on his promise to send Shiro right back to Central Command, likely directly to the witch’s laboratory.

    But things had changed, and Lotor wouldn’t allow him to do that now. Even after this. 

    He wasn’t sure if he'd be able to stop Sendak in this state: he felt weak, and he didn’t even want to try speaking. He didn’t even think he could get back to his quarters on his own right now. 

    Not wanting to remain puddled on the floor of the observation deck forever, he reached for his comms and sent Sendak a message. He’d find a way to deal with this, one way or another. 

    Sendak burst onto the observation deck, practically sprinting to Lotor’s side. “Where are you hurt?” He demanded, half-panicked. “Do you need a doctor?”

    Lotor shook his head, then titled his head back, exposing the gruesome bruising on his throat, floridly magenta, so dark and fresh that it was nearly black in places. 

    “Oh my gods,” Sendak said. “Lotor-“

    Lotor shook his head, then typed out a message on his comms. Take me home.  

    He looked so defeated, so weary… There was a reason Lotor hadn’t limped back to their rooms on his own, so Sendak picked him up, cradling him close to his body, as if he could protect Lotor from something that had already happened.

    “You poor thing,” Sendak murmured. “Oh, baby, who would do this to you?”

    Lotor shook his head again, hiding his face against Sendak’s chest.

    Sendak sighed, and took Lotor back to their quarters. There was no one around to see them, for which Sendak was grateful; Lotor’s dignity was surely in tatters, and there was no reason to add insult to injury. 

    Their quarters were also empty. Sendak got Lotor settled in bed, then set about ordering ice packs and a soothing tea to be brought up. He wasn’t sure what else Lotor wanted or needed, and when he asked, Lotor just shook his head, curling up miserably, facing away from Sendak.

    “Lotor,” Sendak said. “I will find out who did this to you.” The observation deck had cameras, so it wouldn’t be difficult. “You don’t have to be afraid. I will make an example out of them, and no one will ever dare lay a finger on you again.”

    Lotor was silent for a long, long time. “Shiro,” he whispered, his voice so hoarse that it must have been excruciating for him to speak.

    “I don’t know where Shiro is, baby,” Sendak said. “I’ll have someone look for him, but-“ 

    Lotor shook his head, pointing to his throat once more. If anything, it looked worse now, the flesh still bruising. It was very clearly a handprint, and-

    “Shiro did this to you?” Sendak asked, confused and horrified, and- Gods, Shiro had had so many opportunities to harm Lotor, and Sendak had just left them alone together. Yes, Lotor could take care of himself, but-

    But Shiro could have killed him. Shiro had almost killed him.

    “Why?” He asked Lotor.

    Lotor shook his head, and then his shoulders started shaking with silent sobs. Sendak gathered him up in his arms once more and let him cry himself to sleep.